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One December evening in 2019, Chris Stedman noticed a new message in his inbox from his friend Alex, sent at exactly 7 p.m. He and Alex hadn’t talked in a while—was Alex writing to tell him off for being a bad friend? But it wasn’t that. “listen,” the note read. “i am writing to let you know that when you receive this scheduled email, i will no longer be alive.” At the bottom of his message, Alex included a link to a private SoundCloud account. “here’s Alice recordings,” he wrote. Alice. Alex had talked to Chris about her before. A Britney Spears superfan, Alex had befriended this anonymous figure in a Britney fan forum years earlier. Alice had become the stuff of legend in Britney fan circles, and for good reason—she happens to sound exactly like Britney herself. Why was Alex including these recordings in his goodbye email? Who was Alice, really, and what had she meant to Alex? More importantly, could she help Chris understand why his friend was gone? With help from Alex’s loved ones, Chris decides to track down the elusive Alice, in the hopes that she can answer some of the questions Alex couldn’t.
Episodes
A show about looking for answers in the digital breadcrumbs people leave behind.
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A scheduled goodbye email raises as many questions as it answers.
Note: This series discusses topics that may be triggering to some listeners, including depression and suicide. If you or someone you know is having suicidal thoughts, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or text 741741 to speak to somebody immediately.
Created, written, hosted, and executive produced by Chris Stedman
Co-...
Some of the people who knew Alex best look back on how he changed their lives—and then give Chris the push he needs.
Note: This series discusses topics that may be triggering to some listeners, including depression and suicide. If you or someone you know is having suicidal thoughts, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or text 741741 to speak to somebody immediately.
Created, written, ...
Chris goes down the rabbit hole.
Update: Cara Cunningham, creator of the iconic “Leave Britney Alone” video referenced in this episode, announced her transition in August 2021. “I’m happy to be in a place where I can embrace who I am,” Cunningham wrote in her announcement. We couldn’t be happier for her, too.
Note: This series discusses topics that may be triggering to some listeners, including depression and suicide. If you ...
Chris finds some of the answers he's looking for in a Google folder Alex left behind—and others during a conversation with someone else who loved Alex dearly.
Note: This series discusses topics that may be triggering to some listeners, including depression and suicide. If you or someone you know is having suicidal thoughts, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or text 741741 to speak to s...
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