October 13, 2025 • 26 mins
One episode with Tom Schwartz just isn’t enough.
Tom and Lala take a walk down the VPR memory lane and recall some of the cringiest moments on the show. From throwing shade to throwing drinks, these are some of the moments they wish they could forget!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello, Gorgeous. It's Lala Kent. Welcome to Untraditionally, Lala. Hey, Gorgeous,
Lala Kent. Welcome to the bonus episode of Untraditionally Lala.
I have Tom Scholtz. Today. We're going to be talking
about iconic vander Pump moments. And there's a moment that
we talked about on the regular episode that has, to
(00:22):
my dismay, made its way back to the Internet. So
I'm not it's so mortifying you that I'm already now
now just doing what I did on the regular, where
you're like, you are you saying you can ask me anything?
And I'm like, why the fuck did I do that?
Speaker 2 (00:38):
So good? You still got it?
Speaker 1 (00:40):
I don't still got it? But that's okay, Okay, iconic lines?
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Do I have to say? Who would guess who it is? No?
Speaker 1 (00:50):
I mean I did not come up with these iconic
lines because I would never put so many under my own. Sure, Okay,
what would you say? Is the most iconic line that
I've said? Okay, are you trying to get popped? Bamby
eyed bitch all iconic?
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Man? Trying to get popped?
Speaker 3 (01:13):
Is number one most iconic thing you've ever said? Are
you trying to get along. I still think about it,
and people quoted to me all the time. I'm in
Swartz and Sandy's Rip Tom, Tom, I hear that line
all the time.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
You're trying to get popped, and.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
Then Ariana, I don't want to get popped.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
The reaction was so funny because you were You said
it with conviction, You were dead serious.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
I am from the eight to one. I know nothing
about that life, you guys, not even the slightest clue.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
Who was I That baby eyed bitch was the most poignant,
most poignant thing I think you ever said in it,
because when I get angry, I just my mind goes blank.
Speaker 3 (01:54):
But I feel like you become like very articulate in
a venomous way, like yeah, you're good with your words
when you're upset.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Well, here's what happens, Tom, is people poke at me, yeah,
and then they get the wrath that's so intense that
I end up having to apologize profusely and I can't
take it back. So what I'm trying to do, or
what I've been trying to implement in the past couple
of years, a couple of months, whatever it may be,
(02:24):
is like in a moment where you're feeling rage, take
a beat and pinpoint how you're feeling so that you
don't just speal.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
That's not fun.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
I know, I know, but you want to know what's
the worst is going home and beating yourself up over
it and not being able to sleep and having massive
amounts of anxiety.
Speaker 3 (02:46):
I still feel guilty for calling Shina a bootleg Kardashian.
Like I know, it was like seven years ago, and
I like when I'm mean to peoples, it haunts me.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
You don't feel bad that you told me I was
a bootleg housewife and you and those lips, I almost
flipped a pizza in your lap.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
I was, well, God, I literally forgot about that until
just now. Sorry, I don't want to I don't want
to blame all that. I gotta blame that one on
the all cahol.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
Let me tell you something short.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Sorry, sorry, that so mean.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
No, But when someone I live for a time where
you're just delivering it to me, so then I don't
feel guilty about coming back.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
You know, I both.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Mama, you were poking, however I did. I started it
because I said, instead of a drink being thrown on
you, you deserve to be punched in the face. Those are
fighting words.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
No, I was like, and I felt I don't know
why I was so triggered that day. Well, I had
a drink thrown on my face, but I was very upset,
like I wanted to fight him. I'm not a fighter.
And then I was like then and then I turned
into like comedy almost. I was like, I actually thought
it was hilarious, and we like hugged it out the
next day. I know that's always good for TV. But
like he was, yeah, I mean I made a snarky
(04:01):
ass comment.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
It wasn't though. It just didn't land because he was
still hurt from like whatever he was feeling. But I
remember after you were mean to me, you poked your
head through this like wall of string, and you were like, oh,
I'm sorry, I go shut the fuck up.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
I know, I apologize.
Speaker 1 (04:18):
We were all on one hundred.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
I went after your lips, so, I mean I picked them.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
You never go after someone's looks like that.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
But here's the thing. It would be one thing if
I was like born with these lips and you made
fun of them. It's like they're from God. But like
I literally went into a doctor and said give me
these lips. It's like, I'm not offended hand picks.
Speaker 3 (04:39):
Listen, do whatever makes you happy people who are listening,
but just don't fuck with your lips.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
It's always doesn't end well, fuck you, I'm poking. I'm pokeing.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
No, but I'm glad you said that, because it can
get very gnarly, very quick. They wouldn't touch him again.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
They don't look like they did in that one moment.
They look lovely.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
That's what I was trying to get them back to.
And my doctor was like, we're not fucking with your lips.
I was like, God, just put a noodle in the lips.
I will say, they'll filler in the cheeks. Don't ever
do it. Not that you would, but that's like I
got it. And then I went in and immediately had
it dissolved. Really yeah, I did not like it.
Speaker 3 (05:16):
It looked just you look so natural. You don't look
like you've had any surgery. Oh wow, you do.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
Thinks if I were to show you my lop sided tits,
you'd be like someone put a knife in her. Someone
put a knife in her, which, by the way, I'm
totally having done.
Speaker 2 (05:31):
You're getting your breast redone a reproduction.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
Not a reduction. I'm not trying to have mosquito bites, buddy.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
I had no idea what your boobs look like. I
don't know if they're big, medium, small.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
That's fucked up that you wouldn't notice that.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
I mean, i've never seen you naked.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
Well, there's always time today, you have until six pm.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
Although I got punished for allegedly seeing your boobs and Hawaii,
but I never actually saw them.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Oh and that's when they were cute and perky.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Oh that's okay, we were all cute and perky.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
Then we really were your iconic lines. Dude. I used
to live with Kristen. She's the only person I've ever
wanted to murder.
Speaker 3 (06:06):
It's so weird because now I'm so fucking I've always
been tight. That's just a brother's sister thing. Like we
had such a love and not even a love hate,
just love. But like when you're that close to someone,
it's like, yeah, man, that was my sister and she
still is and I love her, but yeah, there was
when I lived together, I had a lot of rage
towards her.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
I love, Like, what that is such a shorts answer,
that's true.
Speaker 3 (06:26):
It's like we've hung out like NonStop, and we were besties.
But also like sometime, you know, I think, like.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
What would she do that would make you want to
murder her?
Speaker 3 (06:34):
Just like her there late night. I don't want to
dredge up the past, but her and Tom late night
like three am fights.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
I'm in the room right next door, and I like
I I.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
My worst sound in the world, My most hated sound
in the world is two people fighting.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
It just gives me so much stress and anxiety.
Speaker 3 (06:51):
And like you took it on, yeah, and I sometimes
it would spill over into my room and stuff and like.
Speaker 1 (06:55):
Yeah, but oh they would come in and try to
drag you into it.
Speaker 3 (06:58):
No, just I don't know, man, I think I repressed it.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
I don't even know how I got to that point.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
But there was a time when I lived with her
where yeah, she was driving me crazy. But now we
joke about it all the time and we love them.
Speaker 1 (07:09):
You know what women always go through at least one
relationship that is like that, where it's fueled by alcohol.
You're young, you got roommates, you have a boyfriend who
keeps fucking up and is making you crazy, which was
the title of her book. He's making you crazy. And
now anytime a man is like that woman's crazy, I'm like, no, no, no, no,
we're gonna need to start from the beginning. What did
(07:31):
you do to make her crazy? Because it's always your
guy's fault.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Well, i'll take it. I'll take it.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
It is always your guy's fault.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
It's yeah, no comment.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
I'm literally just a bartender. Were you ever just a bartender?
I remember you being way bad at that.
Speaker 2 (07:50):
Listen. I'm a great mixologist.
Speaker 3 (07:53):
I can make good cocktails and come, I can curate
a menu, but under pressure, I can't make drinks and
talk to you at the same time.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
I don't have the ability.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
So it's one of the other, and you need to
be good at both in order to be a good bartender.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
I crack under pressure.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
You do mm hm. I feel like you thrive.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Depends on what kind of pressure it' you thrive. Like
if someone I remember like doing okay in school and
then the moment they were like and now there's a test,
it was like, oh my god, I've forgotten everything. Where
am I? What's my name? That kind of pressure I crack.
And and by the way, I was the worst hostess ever.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
I remember I have such clear memories of you hosting
and just like, yeah, like your outfits you would wear,
like really, yeah, you're kind of like, I don't know,
scantily clad.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
Also like you.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Know, no, I remember Diana always being furious because she's like,
that's not where they're supposed to go on, Like, there's
four people, so wherever there's four seats, that's where they're
going to be going.
Speaker 3 (08:53):
Like, we have similar energies when it comes to working
in bars and restaurants.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
Although I've done it in my whole.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Life, hardest job I've ever had, Why do I.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Keep coming back.
Speaker 3 (09:02):
I don't know why because I'm like I hated it
since the beginning, but I always kept coming back as
parts of it.
Speaker 1 (09:07):
I love to the restaurant business.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
I love people, and I love hanging out with people
and being an environment where they're in a good mood,
they're not stressed out about their life, they're having a cocktail.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
So then maybe you should just stick to like doing
appearances at other people's bars, because then you don't have
the pressure of like the alcohol and how much it's
going to cost and like, oh my god, we ordered
too much food that went to waste and what a
waste of money. Like all of those things I feel
like would give me anxiety.
Speaker 3 (09:31):
I will never invest in another bar in miles. This
is a matter how much money I have. I would
never put my name on a lease for a bar.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
Again in my life.
Speaker 3 (09:38):
I would help contribute creatively or something like a.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
Tom Tom situation. You do another one of these invest.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
As long as I have zero liability. Mmm, but I
wouldn't do.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
You guys, you do not want to open a bar restaurant.
I've seen behind the curtains. It is fucking stressful. It'll
eat you alive, coming home late, fox up your sleeping hours,
you miss all the holidays. It's so not worth it
of money you could make as capped unless you scale
and like have a franchise. I mean you can listen.
There's a lot of people who make a lot of money,
but just a lot of people who lose a lot
(10:08):
of money too. It's very scary business.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
It doesn't look fun to me in the least.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
It's scary, horrifying. I have nightmares sometimes still PTSD. I'm
not even joking.
Speaker 3 (10:18):
Yeah, I actually have nightmares about the bar sometimes.
Speaker 1 (10:32):
How much all in all, did you guys invest in
that I probably lost.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
Like six six seven hundred grand, which is insane. I
don't know, six hundred grand a house, for sure, that's
that's a night, the down payment on a beautiful, beautiful house.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
Yeah, like I could have bought like three five rental
properties in Florida or something like cheese.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
I don't think about her anymore. I I released it.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
Sorry, I didn't mean to bring it.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
I was.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
I went on like I had so much, both the
pent up resentment and frustrations, and but I let it
all go.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
I've truly good for you.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
That's very hard to do.
Speaker 3 (11:08):
No, it felt so good, like it was like a
demon leaving my body. Yeah, it was so nice.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
Resentment is the one thing that is the hardest to
get rid of. Yeah, it will eat you alive.
Speaker 3 (11:17):
No, I feel free. I'm skipping and frolicking everywhere.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
Now, good for you. Yeah, Plus, you have a hot
girlfriend that probably helps you know, fuck the resentment out
of you with their hot face. God, do you remember
when James and I were on Watch Rabins Live during
twenty fifteen where we cussed so much that Andy literally
banned us forever.
Speaker 3 (11:39):
Yeah, it's probably one of the most iconic episodes ever,
and I just like to look on Andy's face.
Speaker 2 (11:44):
He was genuinely so. He hated as you guys. He
hated you.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
So I have zero recollection of being there at all. Truthfully,
I didn't realize it was so bad, Like I went
to the club after to celebrate, like how well we did?
Speaker 3 (11:58):
It was so bad. It was good and it was
iconic and I got to talked about earlier. You salvaged
it at the end, singing and James freestyling. That made
up for the whole episode.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
It haunts me, an, can I tell you? I was
so happy because I would tell people about this, and
I wrote about it years ago in my book, and
there were people that would ask me where they can
find it. They couldn't find it on the internet anywhere. Well,
recently it has reappeared and it is my biggest fucking
nightmare that it is. No not thank you. I commented
(12:30):
on it and was like, when someone asks me why
I got sober, this is a part of the montage
that plays in my mind.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
If you haven't seen it, just go on TikTok you'll
find it.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
Talking about my panties dropping, make it go, Pop Pop
Pop until my panties go drop, drop drop. That is
repulsive and disgusting. And I thought, in my mind, wherever
my mind was at that time, thought I was slaying
the I was like, I'm for sure getting a record deal.
Where's Where's doctor Trey? No, you were a little Deululu
(13:07):
Dela law as fuck. I'm sending ocean in that video
when she turns eighteen. Oh Jesus, please don't.
Speaker 2 (13:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
Can I tell you the guy that did my makeup
in that Water Happins Live appearance. I loved my face
so much and maybe it was good, maybe it was bad.
I can't remember. I cannot watch the video. But I
brought him to La to do my first reunion season
four makeup and he had learned a new technique. And
that's when you guys were blessed with my glam on
(13:39):
the season four reunion.
Speaker 3 (13:41):
Yes, that's actually a good photo.
Speaker 1 (13:46):
That is not what it looked like. Your outfit with
that horrendous shade of blue. There it is there, she is.
I want that on a sweatshirt.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
It's so weird that you were like a caricature of
yourself almost you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (13:58):
And what is that blonde hair? It's like very yellow.
Speaker 3 (14:01):
I liked it like your I think your dark era
was your best era. You look gorgeous now.
Speaker 1 (14:06):
But thank you that when I look at that I
go reading ring book, I look like a fucking color wheel.
Speaker 2 (14:14):
Were you self aware at that time? Did you have
did you have the frontal lobe?
Speaker 1 (14:19):
No? Not quite. I was only twenty four. I hadn't
quite developed. I feel like mine developed closer to thirty,
Thank heavens. James shade to Schwartz. Schwartz suggested a sandwich
that could kill a hangover. James then said he wants
a mand witch. We all know Tom likes to sloppy Joe.
(14:42):
Where do you and Joe stand today?
Speaker 3 (14:44):
I have heart, yeah, far apart, but there's no bad blood.
I wish nothing but the best for her. But I
kept her block for some private reasons and stuff. But no,
I honestly if she's if she hears this, I'm always
rooting for her.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Like I hope you're doing well.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
You were you PR trained?
Speaker 2 (15:02):
No? Wow? God, no, how do you get PR trained?
What do you do?
Speaker 1 (15:06):
You are the most like PC person on the planet?
Speaker 2 (15:10):
What does what does media chaining look like? Have you
had it?
Speaker 1 (15:13):
Are you I need constant crisis pr I can't shut
the fuck up.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
Do you like study or do you sit down and
go through?
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Yes, it's like someone who comes in and they're like,
when you're asked this kind of question, they teach you
how to reframe it. Yeah, so that you the person
asking feels like you answered it but you said nothing
at all.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
You know.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
It's the best at that of all time. The goat
Lisa vander Palm. She is so good in a cheeky
smart way.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
She throws shade though, which is what I love about her.
She will because she's not boring.
Speaker 2 (15:45):
Yeah, no, she is great in an interview. She doesn't
hold back. She's spicy, cheeky, but.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
If she if there's something she's not comfortable addressing, she'll
redirect it in a way and not really say much.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
But it's still charming and it's yeah anyway.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
The accent is so flawless too. If I had an accent,
then I feel like everything that came out of my
mouth would be like so much more.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
I miss Lisa.
Speaker 3 (16:06):
I haven't talked to him. I got a FaceTime or
later check in. I know he's the busiest fucking Vegas now.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
The shirtless brawl. Sandoval and Jack's took their shirts off
to fight. Stossy's boyfriend Frank, I don't think I was
around during that. Were you there?
Speaker 2 (16:22):
It was insane?
Speaker 3 (16:24):
Guy, I cannot I think they if anything, I don't don't.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
They could fully capture the stakes of how intense it was.
Speaker 3 (16:31):
It was a barroom brawl, like chairs were flying across
the room.
Speaker 2 (16:35):
It was insane, like it was violent.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
Why why did the shirts get well? Chairs are being
thrown them? Violent?
Speaker 3 (16:43):
One actually got injured. It was all more huffing and puffing,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
It was like, is it because Jackson was in a
knit sweater so he was hot?
Speaker 2 (16:50):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (16:51):
But maybe flying a little too high.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
I'm trying to think the practical reasons why people rip
the sh I know it's a sh like an alpha move.
Speaker 2 (16:58):
It's like beating your chest like a gorilla.
Speaker 3 (17:00):
But like, what are the practical reasons to take your
shirt off so people can't grab it?
Speaker 2 (17:04):
Like? I think it's just a flex a show of machismo, right.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
I mean, I've never been in a fight where I've
removed my shirt.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
Not yet.
Speaker 1 (17:24):
Stassy's Revenge Starssy Trash, Jacks's apartment and drinks six hundred
dollars worth of fish champagne. What was his response when
he found that out? Did he come back to the
boys and thought, holy shit, six hundred dollars? How wild?
Six hundred dollars? Was that just one bottle?
Speaker 2 (17:39):
We used to do catering jobs and we would steal them.
Speaker 1 (17:43):
Oh so it's not like paid for them.
Speaker 3 (17:44):
No, No, we would do private jobs and they were
they like they were you know, they were overstocked, like
and they had big you know, big companies like a
Mowett would be like one of the promoters are what's
the word, I can't think sponsors, sponsor Jesus of the
events and the like.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
You know, we'll take a bottle or two and throw
them in our bag. You know, we wouldn't get greedy.
Speaker 3 (18:05):
But yeah, but like every every single catering job I
ever did, I would take at least two bottles.
Speaker 2 (18:10):
Wow. Yeah, and I regret nothing.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
Why would you?
Speaker 3 (18:14):
And there was times I took more maybe ten fifteen,
but just clinking from two to fifty although no, okay, And.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
There some days I was like, fucking, I'm taking the
whole case.
Speaker 3 (18:27):
I got fired from one of my jobs. Actually, I
never told anyone that it was the last one. It
was one of my I forget the name of the company,
but it was like my favorite company to work for,
and they were so sweet. But I one of the
bartenders went home six. So I was just slanging drinks and.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
That's that's my wheelhouse.
Speaker 3 (18:40):
You know, you're porn Boka Sota's shots, Like that's my specialty.
Speaker 2 (18:44):
Oh yeah, Jack and Cox.
Speaker 3 (18:45):
But I took like two bottles of tequila and for
some reason, the managers went in my bag and they're like,
we're gonna have to ask you to leave, and it
was all somber.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
Did you have to leave the bottles behind you?
Speaker 2 (18:56):
And they never hired me again.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
But I was like, come on, did you get to
keep the bottles?
Speaker 2 (18:59):
Though? Like come on, dude, Like really, who cares?
Speaker 1 (19:04):
Who cares?
Speaker 2 (19:05):
They have billions of dollars? Like it's just you know
what I.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
Mean, right, do you know how much money the alcohol
industry brings in?
Speaker 3 (19:10):
And I know what the bodel is actually it's like, dude, anyway,
how old were you? I think this is this is
before the show started. This is like twenty ten.
Speaker 1 (19:20):
Oh yeah, why would you ever in your whole life
throw a drink on Katie during an argument, and that
couldn't have been the first time you so you so
flawlessly dumped the drink.
Speaker 2 (19:30):
I'm in my entire life, I've done that. I know that.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Really like what possessed you.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
I don't know. I was like she was. I have
no excuse for it.
Speaker 3 (19:37):
I think I lost my mind, clearly, I don't know,
but I think if I remember, it wasn't like I
threw it in her face.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
I just kind to throw it in her direction.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
No, you dumped it on her head.
Speaker 2 (19:46):
No I did not.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
I saw the footage.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
I'm going to make people go.
Speaker 3 (19:50):
Look at that because that was like my lowest moment.
But I think I just lost my mind that trip.
I was just in such a bad place. I fucking
lost my mind.
Speaker 1 (19:58):
Do you remember when Dody threw a drink at James
when we were in Mexico and it landed on me,
And the whole reason it was thrown was because Jack's
and Sandoval made up this lie that James, you were
fucked up. You couldn't even function. You guys had just
gone coffing. You guys had just.
Speaker 3 (20:18):
Gone call that one of our sloppiest days. Ever, the
sloppiest is the night before.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
Yes, it was very intense.
Speaker 2 (20:25):
That's that's where I woke up in the wrong resort.
Speaker 1 (20:27):
On the wrong beach. Yeah, he was you were elsewhere?
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (20:31):
And the way that it was like one one of
the times I looked at and felt so badly for James,
like rewatching it and him being like, do I hang
out with Kristen? Not really? A little bit, not really,
And everyone's like, we asked him if he hooked up
with Kristen and he said a little bit, not really,
and he was like, I didn't do that, and he
(20:53):
was like crying to me in my room. Then he
got a drink thrown on him. What did drink's being
thrown on? Vander Pump? Do you think the new season
will have a lot of drinks being thrown?
Speaker 2 (21:01):
I hope. So.
Speaker 3 (21:02):
I love a good drink throw. It's like one of
the pillars of any great reality. So you knew the
occasional drink throw. I don't ever want to be a
part of that again in my life, but it's really inerting.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
One else needs to do it.
Speaker 3 (21:13):
I love a good drink throw. Yeah, yeah, I like
women on women drink throwing. Not that's like almost fetishizing it.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
No, but and I love when they're in white T
shirts with no bra. But it's like a fucking weirdo.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
There's a double stand No, it's not sexual in nature,
but it's like maybe there's a double standard. Like when
guys do it seem so like bitchy they just I
don't know, like aggressive, like violent for some reason.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
Like when I see like the Housewives do it, it's
like funny.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
It's because I think you also, like myself, appreciate the
art of reality television.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
I sure do.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
I want to ask you something very quickly. You said
that you had a crush on Alexia from Miami.
Speaker 2 (21:53):
I don't know when I ever said that, but I
think I did say it.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
Yeah, but listen, I saw it in a lot of places.
She's fucking stunning.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
She's gorgeous, and she's so damn charming.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
And I've always like, I've always liked I think for
like I don't know Miami women, Cuban women, God like,
I just I've never dated one, but I've always been.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
You could not handle all that, honey, That's what I hear.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
Let me, that's what I hear.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
But you could not handle gorge and I.
Speaker 3 (22:19):
Went to her salon and had such a good time.
And she's cool as ship. We had so much fun.
Speaker 1 (22:24):
But yeah, that's the one time I was jealous of you.
Speaker 2 (22:26):
Have you hung out with her?
Speaker 1 (22:28):
No, we communicate via Instagram, though.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
She's so fun. And yeah, housewives with Miami or the ship?
What's your favorite housewives? Oh see?
Speaker 1 (22:40):
Or I mean, uh, fucking Miami's crushing it?
Speaker 2 (22:44):
Yeah, Miami, Saltlake Cities like Numbers.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
Is very good.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
It's so good.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
Did you notice during the wedding or did you watch
it where Sandoval wipes the tears?
Speaker 2 (22:53):
Oh? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (22:54):
With his dogs? With your dogs?
Speaker 3 (22:56):
So sweet, so sweet. Butter is such an EmPATH, like
he did. I know he was there crying too. He's
such a sweet guy.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
He's such an empathy. I can't I want you to
have children, just so I can see what changes with
you and your dogs. I remember Lily laying her head
on the bath and I was like expecting ocean and
I looked at her and we made like just the
most soul to soul connection. I was like, Lily, I
(23:26):
will never love this baby more than I love you.
Don't even worry about it, girl, moment I came home,
Lily's on the bed. I'm like, Lily, you gotta get
off the bed. No hair near the baby, off the bed.
Not saying that I don't love her.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
It just shifts.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
But I would just be curious to see.
Speaker 2 (23:42):
Yeah, I can't wait too.
Speaker 1 (23:43):
I loved when he wiped the tears with butter. Didn't
have blonde streaks. I have the blonde or like silver streaks.
Speaker 2 (23:53):
I liked his silver streak era.
Speaker 1 (23:55):
It was horrendous.
Speaker 2 (23:56):
I liked it. It was very very nineties boy band.
Speaker 1 (23:59):
Don't fuel don't fuel it, please don't for the love
of God. Last one was the New Orleans bachelor party.
He's a fucking battered wife, kicks the door in.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
I think I should have died on that trip. No,
I don't want to say that.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
But were you taking a deuce? You were sitting on
the door.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
I was just taking a moment because I was so
stressed out and I just felt like crying. I remember
just being really like intoxicated, and I.
Speaker 2 (24:28):
Just was like sad.
Speaker 3 (24:29):
I remember I was junkie, but I was more. I
was really sad and stressed out. I felt like I
was like I was gonna lose like the love of
my life. At the time, I was like, I fucking
sabotaging my relationship.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
Yeah, and the instead you went on to sabotage it
anyway when it ended anyway.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
Oh, listen, I think it was probably, Yeah, that was probably.
Speaker 2 (24:50):
That's my favorite, probably my favorite episode.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
I think I never saw it. Yeah, I'm going to
go back and watch it.
Speaker 2 (24:56):
It's so funny.
Speaker 1 (24:57):
I have to go back and watch it.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
It's so fun looking funny.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
I need to go back to season one and watch
all the vander Pump roles because and stop when I enter,
but I do not. During COVID, I went back and watched,
but for some reason, I'm not remembering anything that happens,
Like I'm not remembering the Frank fight right with them.
I want to give one teaser, Yeah, that that is
(25:22):
not the last time people are going to see you
dressed as a girl.
Speaker 2 (25:25):
That's true.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
I'm very excited about it.
Speaker 3 (25:28):
True, and I think I totally redeemed myself.
Speaker 1 (25:30):
I think you did too, I don't.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
I hate that one of my legacies is being the
ugliest man as a woman ever and when people comment
that to me all the time, like Schwartz, you're You're
a pretty good looking dude. You're kind of sexy, but
like you are the ugliest woman on the planet.
Speaker 2 (25:46):
I hear that a lot. The ugliest.
Speaker 1 (25:48):
Well, let's hope you don't pro create girls. Oh and
the girls always look just like their dad from what
I've heard. All Right, Schwartzy, thanks for sticking around for
the Boner episode. I appreciate you. Thank you guys for
listening to another episode of the Bonus untraditionally, Lala, I
will catch you guys on Wednesday and again next week. Bye.
Hello, Gorgeous. It's Lala Kent. Welcome to Untraditionally, Lala. Hey, Gorgeous,
Lala Kent. Welcome to the bonus episode of Untraditionally Lala.
I have Tom Scholtz. Today. We're going to be talking
about iconic vander Pump moments. And there's a moment that
we talked about on the regular episode that has, to
(00:22):
my dismay, made its way back to the Internet. So
I'm not it's so mortifying you that I'm already now
now just doing what I did on the regular, where
you're like, you are you saying you can ask me anything?
And I'm like, why the fuck did I do that?
Speaker 2 (00:38):
So good? You still got it?
Speaker 1 (00:40):
I don't still got it? But that's okay, Okay, iconic lines?
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Do I have to say? Who would guess who it is? No?
Speaker 1 (00:50):
I mean I did not come up with these iconic
lines because I would never put so many under my own. Sure, Okay,
what would you say? Is the most iconic line that
I've said? Okay, are you trying to get popped? Bamby
eyed bitch all iconic?
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Man? Trying to get popped?
Speaker 3 (01:13):
Is number one most iconic thing you've ever said? Are
you trying to get along. I still think about it,
and people quoted to me all the time. I'm in
Swartz and Sandy's Rip Tom, Tom, I hear that line
all the time.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
You're trying to get popped, and.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
Then Ariana, I don't want to get popped.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
The reaction was so funny because you were You said
it with conviction, You were dead serious.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
I am from the eight to one. I know nothing
about that life, you guys, not even the slightest clue.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
Who was I That baby eyed bitch was the most poignant,
most poignant thing I think you ever said in it,
because when I get angry, I just my mind goes blank.
Speaker 3 (01:54):
But I feel like you become like very articulate in
a venomous way, like yeah, you're good with your words
when you're upset.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Well, here's what happens, Tom, is people poke at me, yeah,
and then they get the wrath that's so intense that
I end up having to apologize profusely and I can't
take it back. So what I'm trying to do, or
what I've been trying to implement in the past couple
of years, a couple of months, whatever it may be,
(02:24):
is like in a moment where you're feeling rage, take
a beat and pinpoint how you're feeling so that you
don't just speal.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
That's not fun.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
I know, I know, but you want to know what's
the worst is going home and beating yourself up over
it and not being able to sleep and having massive
amounts of anxiety.
Speaker 3 (02:46):
I still feel guilty for calling Shina a bootleg Kardashian.
Like I know, it was like seven years ago, and
I like when I'm mean to peoples, it haunts me.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
You don't feel bad that you told me I was
a bootleg housewife and you and those lips, I almost
flipped a pizza in your lap.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
I was, well, God, I literally forgot about that until
just now. Sorry, I don't want to I don't want
to blame all that. I gotta blame that one on
the all cahol.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
Let me tell you something short.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Sorry, sorry, that so mean.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
No, But when someone I live for a time where
you're just delivering it to me, so then I don't
feel guilty about coming back.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
You know, I both.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Mama, you were poking, however I did. I started it
because I said, instead of a drink being thrown on
you, you deserve to be punched in the face. Those are
fighting words.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
No, I was like, and I felt I don't know
why I was so triggered that day. Well, I had
a drink thrown on my face, but I was very upset,
like I wanted to fight him. I'm not a fighter.
And then I was like then and then I turned
into like comedy almost. I was like, I actually thought
it was hilarious, and we like hugged it out the
next day. I know that's always good for TV. But
like he was, yeah, I mean I made a snarky
(04:01):
ass comment.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
It wasn't though. It just didn't land because he was
still hurt from like whatever he was feeling. But I
remember after you were mean to me, you poked your
head through this like wall of string, and you were like, oh,
I'm sorry, I go shut the fuck up.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
I know, I apologize.
Speaker 1 (04:18):
We were all on one hundred.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
I went after your lips, so, I mean I picked them.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
You never go after someone's looks like that.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
But here's the thing. It would be one thing if
I was like born with these lips and you made
fun of them. It's like they're from God. But like
I literally went into a doctor and said give me
these lips. It's like, I'm not offended hand picks.
Speaker 3 (04:39):
Listen, do whatever makes you happy people who are listening,
but just don't fuck with your lips.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
It's always doesn't end well, fuck you, I'm poking. I'm pokeing.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
No, but I'm glad you said that, because it can
get very gnarly, very quick. They wouldn't touch him again.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
They don't look like they did in that one moment.
They look lovely.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
That's what I was trying to get them back to.
And my doctor was like, we're not fucking with your lips.
I was like, God, just put a noodle in the lips.
I will say, they'll filler in the cheeks. Don't ever
do it. Not that you would, but that's like I
got it. And then I went in and immediately had
it dissolved. Really yeah, I did not like it.
Speaker 3 (05:16):
It looked just you look so natural. You don't look
like you've had any surgery. Oh wow, you do.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
Thinks if I were to show you my lop sided tits,
you'd be like someone put a knife in her. Someone
put a knife in her, which, by the way, I'm
totally having done.
Speaker 2 (05:31):
You're getting your breast redone a reproduction.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
Not a reduction. I'm not trying to have mosquito bites, buddy.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
I had no idea what your boobs look like. I
don't know if they're big, medium, small.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
That's fucked up that you wouldn't notice that.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
I mean, i've never seen you naked.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
Well, there's always time today, you have until six pm.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
Although I got punished for allegedly seeing your boobs and Hawaii,
but I never actually saw them.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Oh and that's when they were cute and perky.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Oh that's okay, we were all cute and perky.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
Then we really were your iconic lines. Dude. I used
to live with Kristen. She's the only person I've ever
wanted to murder.
Speaker 3 (06:06):
It's so weird because now I'm so fucking I've always
been tight. That's just a brother's sister thing. Like we
had such a love and not even a love hate,
just love. But like when you're that close to someone,
it's like, yeah, man, that was my sister and she
still is and I love her, but yeah, there was
when I lived together, I had a lot of rage
towards her.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
I love, Like, what that is such a shorts answer,
that's true.
Speaker 3 (06:26):
It's like we've hung out like NonStop, and we were besties.
But also like sometime, you know, I think, like.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
What would she do that would make you want to
murder her?
Speaker 3 (06:34):
Just like her there late night. I don't want to
dredge up the past, but her and Tom late night
like three am fights.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
I'm in the room right next door, and I like
I I.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
My worst sound in the world, My most hated sound
in the world is two people fighting.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
It just gives me so much stress and anxiety.
Speaker 3 (06:51):
And like you took it on, yeah, and I sometimes
it would spill over into my room and stuff and like.
Speaker 1 (06:55):
Yeah, but oh they would come in and try to
drag you into it.
Speaker 3 (06:58):
No, just I don't know, man, I think I repressed it.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
I don't even know how I got to that point.
Speaker 3 (07:03):
But there was a time when I lived with her
where yeah, she was driving me crazy. But now we
joke about it all the time and we love them.
Speaker 1 (07:09):
You know what women always go through at least one
relationship that is like that, where it's fueled by alcohol.
You're young, you got roommates, you have a boyfriend who
keeps fucking up and is making you crazy, which was
the title of her book. He's making you crazy. And
now anytime a man is like that woman's crazy, I'm like, no, no, no, no,
we're gonna need to start from the beginning. What did
(07:31):
you do to make her crazy? Because it's always your
guy's fault.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Well, i'll take it. I'll take it.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
It is always your guy's fault.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
It's yeah, no comment.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
I'm literally just a bartender. Were you ever just a bartender?
I remember you being way bad at that.
Speaker 2 (07:50):
Listen. I'm a great mixologist.
Speaker 3 (07:53):
I can make good cocktails and come, I can curate
a menu, but under pressure, I can't make drinks and
talk to you at the same time.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
I don't have the ability.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
So it's one of the other, and you need to
be good at both in order to be a good bartender.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
I crack under pressure.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
You do mm hm. I feel like you thrive.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Depends on what kind of pressure it' you thrive. Like
if someone I remember like doing okay in school and
then the moment they were like and now there's a test,
it was like, oh my god, I've forgotten everything. Where
am I? What's my name? That kind of pressure I crack.
And and by the way, I was the worst hostess ever.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
I remember I have such clear memories of you hosting
and just like, yeah, like your outfits you would wear,
like really, yeah, you're kind of like, I don't know,
scantily clad.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
Also like you.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Know, no, I remember Diana always being furious because she's like,
that's not where they're supposed to go on, Like, there's
four people, so wherever there's four seats, that's where they're
going to be going.
Speaker 3 (08:53):
Like, we have similar energies when it comes to working
in bars and restaurants.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
Although I've done it in my whole.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Life, hardest job I've ever had, Why do I.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Keep coming back.
Speaker 3 (09:02):
I don't know why because I'm like I hated it
since the beginning, but I always kept coming back as
parts of it.
Speaker 1 (09:07):
I love to the restaurant business.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
I love people, and I love hanging out with people
and being an environment where they're in a good mood,
they're not stressed out about their life, they're having a cocktail.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
So then maybe you should just stick to like doing
appearances at other people's bars, because then you don't have
the pressure of like the alcohol and how much it's
going to cost and like, oh my god, we ordered
too much food that went to waste and what a
waste of money. Like all of those things I feel
like would give me anxiety.
Speaker 3 (09:31):
I will never invest in another bar in miles. This
is a matter how much money I have. I would
never put my name on a lease for a bar.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
Again in my life.
Speaker 3 (09:38):
I would help contribute creatively or something like a.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
Tom Tom situation. You do another one of these invest.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
As long as I have zero liability. Mmm, but I
wouldn't do.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
You guys, you do not want to open a bar restaurant.
I've seen behind the curtains. It is fucking stressful. It'll
eat you alive, coming home late, fox up your sleeping hours,
you miss all the holidays. It's so not worth it
of money you could make as capped unless you scale
and like have a franchise. I mean you can listen.
There's a lot of people who make a lot of money,
but just a lot of people who lose a lot
(10:08):
of money too. It's very scary business.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
It doesn't look fun to me in the least.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
It's scary, horrifying. I have nightmares sometimes still PTSD. I'm
not even joking.
Speaker 3 (10:18):
Yeah, I actually have nightmares about the bar sometimes.
Speaker 1 (10:32):
How much all in all, did you guys invest in
that I probably lost.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
Like six six seven hundred grand, which is insane. I
don't know, six hundred grand a house, for sure, that's
that's a night, the down payment on a beautiful, beautiful house.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
Oh my god.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
Yeah, like I could have bought like three five rental
properties in Florida or something like cheese.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
I don't think about her anymore. I I released it.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
Sorry, I didn't mean to bring it.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
I was.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
I went on like I had so much, both the
pent up resentment and frustrations, and but I let it
all go.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
I've truly good for you.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
That's very hard to do.
Speaker 3 (11:08):
No, it felt so good, like it was like a
demon leaving my body. Yeah, it was so nice.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
Resentment is the one thing that is the hardest to
get rid of. Yeah, it will eat you alive.
Speaker 3 (11:17):
No, I feel free. I'm skipping and frolicking everywhere.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
Now, good for you. Yeah, Plus, you have a hot
girlfriend that probably helps you know, fuck the resentment out
of you with their hot face. God, do you remember
when James and I were on Watch Rabins Live during
twenty fifteen where we cussed so much that Andy literally
banned us forever.
Speaker 3 (11:39):
Yeah, it's probably one of the most iconic episodes ever,
and I just like to look on Andy's face.
Speaker 2 (11:44):
He was genuinely so. He hated as you guys. He
hated you.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
So I have zero recollection of being there at all. Truthfully,
I didn't realize it was so bad, Like I went
to the club after to celebrate, like how well we did?
Speaker 3 (11:58):
It was so bad. It was good and it was
iconic and I got to talked about earlier. You salvaged
it at the end, singing and James freestyling. That made
up for the whole episode.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
It haunts me, an, can I tell you? I was
so happy because I would tell people about this, and
I wrote about it years ago in my book, and
there were people that would ask me where they can
find it. They couldn't find it on the internet anywhere. Well,
recently it has reappeared and it is my biggest fucking
nightmare that it is. No not thank you. I commented
(12:30):
on it and was like, when someone asks me why
I got sober, this is a part of the montage
that plays in my mind.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
If you haven't seen it, just go on TikTok you'll
find it.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
Talking about my panties dropping, make it go, Pop Pop
Pop until my panties go drop, drop drop. That is
repulsive and disgusting. And I thought, in my mind, wherever
my mind was at that time, thought I was slaying
the I was like, I'm for sure getting a record deal.
Where's Where's doctor Trey? No, you were a little Deululu
(13:07):
Dela law as fuck. I'm sending ocean in that video
when she turns eighteen. Oh Jesus, please don't.
Speaker 2 (13:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
Can I tell you the guy that did my makeup
in that Water Happins Live appearance. I loved my face
so much and maybe it was good, maybe it was bad.
I can't remember. I cannot watch the video. But I
brought him to La to do my first reunion season
four makeup and he had learned a new technique. And
that's when you guys were blessed with my glam on
(13:39):
the season four reunion.
Speaker 3 (13:41):
Yes, that's actually a good photo.
Speaker 1 (13:46):
That is not what it looked like. Your outfit with
that horrendous shade of blue. There it is there, she is.
I want that on a sweatshirt.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
It's so weird that you were like a caricature of
yourself almost you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (13:58):
And what is that blonde hair? It's like very yellow.
Speaker 3 (14:01):
I liked it like your I think your dark era
was your best era. You look gorgeous now.
Speaker 1 (14:06):
But thank you that when I look at that I
go reading ring book, I look like a fucking color wheel.
Speaker 2 (14:14):
Were you self aware at that time? Did you have
did you have the frontal lobe?
Speaker 1 (14:19):
No? Not quite. I was only twenty four. I hadn't
quite developed. I feel like mine developed closer to thirty,
Thank heavens. James shade to Schwartz. Schwartz suggested a sandwich
that could kill a hangover. James then said he wants
a mand witch. We all know Tom likes to sloppy Joe.
(14:42):
Where do you and Joe stand today?
Speaker 3 (14:44):
I have heart, yeah, far apart, but there's no bad blood.
I wish nothing but the best for her. But I
kept her block for some private reasons and stuff. But no,
I honestly if she's if she hears this, I'm always
rooting for her.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Like I hope you're doing well.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
You were you PR trained?
Speaker 2 (15:02):
No? Wow? God, no, how do you get PR trained?
What do you do?
Speaker 1 (15:06):
You are the most like PC person on the planet?
Speaker 2 (15:10):
What does what does media chaining look like? Have you
had it?
Speaker 1 (15:13):
Are you I need constant crisis pr I can't shut
the fuck up.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
Do you like study or do you sit down and
go through?
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Yes, it's like someone who comes in and they're like,
when you're asked this kind of question, they teach you
how to reframe it. Yeah, so that you the person
asking feels like you answered it but you said nothing
at all.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
You know.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
It's the best at that of all time. The goat
Lisa vander Palm. She is so good in a cheeky
smart way.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
She throws shade though, which is what I love about her.
She will because she's not boring.
Speaker 2 (15:45):
Yeah, no, she is great in an interview. She doesn't
hold back. She's spicy, cheeky, but.
Speaker 3 (15:49):
If she if there's something she's not comfortable addressing, she'll
redirect it in a way and not really say much.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
But it's still charming and it's yeah anyway.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
The accent is so flawless too. If I had an accent,
then I feel like everything that came out of my
mouth would be like so much more.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
I miss Lisa.
Speaker 3 (16:06):
I haven't talked to him. I got a FaceTime or
later check in. I know he's the busiest fucking Vegas now.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
The shirtless brawl. Sandoval and Jack's took their shirts off
to fight. Stossy's boyfriend Frank, I don't think I was
around during that. Were you there?
Speaker 2 (16:22):
It was insane?
Speaker 3 (16:24):
Guy, I cannot I think they if anything, I don't don't.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
They could fully capture the stakes of how intense it was.
Speaker 3 (16:31):
It was a barroom brawl, like chairs were flying across
the room.
Speaker 2 (16:35):
It was insane, like it was violent.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
Why why did the shirts get well? Chairs are being
thrown them? Violent?
Speaker 3 (16:43):
One actually got injured. It was all more huffing and puffing,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
It was like, is it because Jackson was in a
knit sweater so he was hot?
Speaker 2 (16:50):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (16:51):
But maybe flying a little too high.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
I'm trying to think the practical reasons why people rip
the sh I know it's a sh like an alpha move.
Speaker 2 (16:58):
It's like beating your chest like a gorilla.
Speaker 3 (17:00):
But like, what are the practical reasons to take your
shirt off so people can't grab it?
Speaker 2 (17:04):
Like? I think it's just a flex a show of machismo, right.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
I mean, I've never been in a fight where I've
removed my shirt.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
Not yet.
Speaker 1 (17:24):
Stassy's Revenge Starssy Trash, Jacks's apartment and drinks six hundred
dollars worth of fish champagne. What was his response when
he found that out? Did he come back to the
boys and thought, holy shit, six hundred dollars? How wild?
Six hundred dollars? Was that just one bottle?
Speaker 2 (17:39):
We used to do catering jobs and we would steal them.
Speaker 1 (17:43):
Oh so it's not like paid for them.
Speaker 3 (17:44):
No, No, we would do private jobs and they were
they like they were you know, they were overstocked, like
and they had big you know, big companies like a
Mowett would be like one of the promoters are what's
the word, I can't think sponsors, sponsor Jesus of the
events and the like.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
You know, we'll take a bottle or two and throw
them in our bag. You know, we wouldn't get greedy.
Speaker 3 (18:05):
But yeah, but like every every single catering job I
ever did, I would take at least two bottles.
Speaker 2 (18:10):
Wow. Yeah, and I regret nothing.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
Why would you?
Speaker 3 (18:14):
And there was times I took more maybe ten fifteen,
but just clinking from two to fifty although no, okay, And.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
There some days I was like, fucking, I'm taking the
whole case.
Speaker 3 (18:27):
I got fired from one of my jobs. Actually, I
never told anyone that it was the last one. It
was one of my I forget the name of the company,
but it was like my favorite company to work for,
and they were so sweet. But I one of the
bartenders went home six. So I was just slanging drinks and.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
That's that's my wheelhouse.
Speaker 3 (18:40):
You know, you're porn Boka Sota's shots, Like that's my specialty.
Speaker 2 (18:44):
Oh yeah, Jack and Cox.
Speaker 3 (18:45):
But I took like two bottles of tequila and for
some reason, the managers went in my bag and they're like,
we're gonna have to ask you to leave, and it
was all somber.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
Did you have to leave the bottles behind you?
Speaker 2 (18:56):
And they never hired me again.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
But I was like, come on, did you get to
keep the bottles?
Speaker 2 (18:59):
Though? Like come on, dude, Like really, who cares?
Speaker 1 (19:04):
Who cares?
Speaker 2 (19:05):
They have billions of dollars? Like it's just you know
what I.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
Mean, right, do you know how much money the alcohol
industry brings in?
Speaker 3 (19:10):
And I know what the bodel is actually it's like, dude, anyway,
how old were you? I think this is this is
before the show started. This is like twenty ten.
Speaker 1 (19:20):
Oh yeah, why would you ever in your whole life
throw a drink on Katie during an argument, and that
couldn't have been the first time you so you so
flawlessly dumped the drink.
Speaker 2 (19:30):
I'm in my entire life, I've done that. I know that.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Really like what possessed you.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
I don't know. I was like she was. I have
no excuse for it.
Speaker 3 (19:37):
I think I lost my mind, clearly, I don't know,
but I think if I remember, it wasn't like I
threw it in her face.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
I just kind to throw it in her direction.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
No, you dumped it on her head.
Speaker 2 (19:46):
No I did not.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
I saw the footage.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
I'm going to make people go.
Speaker 3 (19:50):
Look at that because that was like my lowest moment.
But I think I just lost my mind that trip.
I was just in such a bad place. I fucking
lost my mind.
Speaker 1 (19:58):
Do you remember when Dody threw a drink at James
when we were in Mexico and it landed on me,
And the whole reason it was thrown was because Jack's
and Sandoval made up this lie that James, you were
fucked up. You couldn't even function. You guys had just
gone coffing. You guys had just.
Speaker 3 (20:18):
Gone call that one of our sloppiest days. Ever, the
sloppiest is the night before.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
Yes, it was very intense.
Speaker 2 (20:25):
That's that's where I woke up in the wrong resort.
Speaker 1 (20:27):
On the wrong beach. Yeah, he was you were elsewhere?
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (20:31):
And the way that it was like one one of
the times I looked at and felt so badly for James,
like rewatching it and him being like, do I hang
out with Kristen? Not really? A little bit, not really,
And everyone's like, we asked him if he hooked up
with Kristen and he said a little bit, not really,
and he was like, I didn't do that, and he
(20:53):
was like crying to me in my room. Then he
got a drink thrown on him. What did drink's being
thrown on? Vander Pump? Do you think the new season
will have a lot of drinks being thrown?
Speaker 2 (21:01):
I hope. So.
Speaker 3 (21:02):
I love a good drink throw. It's like one of
the pillars of any great reality. So you knew the
occasional drink throw. I don't ever want to be a
part of that again in my life, but it's really inerting.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
One else needs to do it.
Speaker 3 (21:13):
I love a good drink throw. Yeah, yeah, I like
women on women drink throwing. Not that's like almost fetishizing it.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
No, but and I love when they're in white T
shirts with no bra. But it's like a fucking weirdo.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
There's a double stand No, it's not sexual in nature,
but it's like maybe there's a double standard. Like when
guys do it seem so like bitchy they just I
don't know, like aggressive, like violent for some reason.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
Like when I see like the Housewives do it, it's
like funny.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
It's because I think you also, like myself, appreciate the
art of reality television.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
I sure do.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
I want to ask you something very quickly. You said
that you had a crush on Alexia from Miami.
Speaker 2 (21:53):
I don't know when I ever said that, but I
think I did say it.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
Yeah, but listen, I saw it in a lot of places.
She's fucking stunning.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
She's gorgeous, and she's so damn charming.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
And I've always like, I've always liked I think for
like I don't know Miami women, Cuban women, God like,
I just I've never dated one, but I've always been.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
You could not handle all that, honey, That's what I hear.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
Let me, that's what I hear.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
But you could not handle gorge and I.
Speaker 3 (22:19):
Went to her salon and had such a good time.
And she's cool as ship. We had so much fun.
Speaker 1 (22:24):
But yeah, that's the one time I was jealous of you.
Speaker 2 (22:26):
Have you hung out with her?
Speaker 1 (22:28):
No, we communicate via Instagram, though.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
She's so fun. And yeah, housewives with Miami or the ship?
What's your favorite housewives? Oh see?
Speaker 1 (22:40):
Or I mean, uh, fucking Miami's crushing it?
Speaker 2 (22:44):
Yeah, Miami, Saltlake Cities like Numbers.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
Is very good.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
It's so good.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
Did you notice during the wedding or did you watch
it where Sandoval wipes the tears?
Speaker 2 (22:53):
Oh? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (22:54):
With his dogs? With your dogs?
Speaker 3 (22:56):
So sweet, so sweet. Butter is such an EmPATH, like
he did. I know he was there crying too. He's
such a sweet guy.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
He's such an empathy. I can't I want you to
have children, just so I can see what changes with
you and your dogs. I remember Lily laying her head
on the bath and I was like expecting ocean and
I looked at her and we made like just the
most soul to soul connection. I was like, Lily, I
(23:26):
will never love this baby more than I love you.
Don't even worry about it, girl, moment I came home,
Lily's on the bed. I'm like, Lily, you gotta get
off the bed. No hair near the baby, off the bed.
Not saying that I don't love her.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
It just shifts.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
But I would just be curious to see.
Speaker 2 (23:42):
Yeah, I can't wait too.
Speaker 1 (23:43):
I loved when he wiped the tears with butter. Didn't
have blonde streaks. I have the blonde or like silver streaks.
Speaker 2 (23:53):
I liked his silver streak era.
Speaker 1 (23:55):
It was horrendous.
Speaker 2 (23:56):
I liked it. It was very very nineties boy band.
Speaker 1 (23:59):
Don't fuel don't fuel it, please don't for the love
of God. Last one was the New Orleans bachelor party.
He's a fucking battered wife, kicks the door in.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
I think I should have died on that trip. No,
I don't want to say that.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
But were you taking a deuce? You were sitting on
the door.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
I was just taking a moment because I was so
stressed out and I just felt like crying. I remember
just being really like intoxicated, and I.
Speaker 2 (24:28):
Just was like sad.
Speaker 3 (24:29):
I remember I was junkie, but I was more. I
was really sad and stressed out. I felt like I
was like I was gonna lose like the love of
my life. At the time, I was like, I fucking
sabotaging my relationship.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
Yeah, and the instead you went on to sabotage it
anyway when it ended anyway.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
Oh, listen, I think it was probably, Yeah, that was probably.
Speaker 2 (24:50):
That's my favorite, probably my favorite episode.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
I think I never saw it. Yeah, I'm going to
go back and watch it.
Speaker 2 (24:56):
It's so funny.
Speaker 1 (24:57):
I have to go back and watch it.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
It's so fun looking funny.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
I need to go back to season one and watch
all the vander Pump roles because and stop when I enter,
but I do not. During COVID, I went back and watched,
but for some reason, I'm not remembering anything that happens,
Like I'm not remembering the Frank fight right with them.
I want to give one teaser, Yeah, that that is
(25:22):
not the last time people are going to see you
dressed as a girl.
Speaker 2 (25:25):
That's true.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
I'm very excited about it.
Speaker 3 (25:28):
True, and I think I totally redeemed myself.
Speaker 1 (25:30):
I think you did too, I don't.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
I hate that one of my legacies is being the
ugliest man as a woman ever and when people comment
that to me all the time, like Schwartz, you're You're
a pretty good looking dude. You're kind of sexy, but
like you are the ugliest woman on the planet.
Speaker 2 (25:46):
I hear that a lot. The ugliest.
Speaker 1 (25:48):
Well, let's hope you don't pro create girls. Oh and
the girls always look just like their dad from what
I've heard. All Right, Schwartzy, thanks for sticking around for
the Boner episode. I appreciate you. Thank you guys for
listening to another episode of the Bonus untraditionally, Lala, I
will catch you guys on Wednesday and again next week. Bye.
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