Broke Bestie

AJ and Tam Bam recap highlights from a recent cruise while opening up about the real-life conversations that followed once the vacation ended. From the emotional realities of aging parents and family health concerns to the growing responsibilities that come with adulthood, the hosts reflect on how life shifts as priorities change.

The discussion expands into modern relationship dynamics, with a sharp focus on financial boundaries, expectations, and independence. AJ and Tam Bam unpack topics like financial celibacy, navigating friendships with money disparities, being the so-called “broke bestie,” and how grief and healing play out publicly in the age of social media. 

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to We Talk Back Podcast, the production of iHeartRadio
and the Black Effect Network.

Speaker 2 (00:08):
We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion. Who talks.
What's up?

Speaker 1 (00:16):
Y'all's your girl? A j holiday? What's up? Tam Damn?

Speaker 2 (00:20):
Hey, y'all, it's Tan band. I love y'all so much.
How you doing? Hey day?

Speaker 1 (00:24):
Why are you doing this? You want to fight?

Speaker 2 (00:26):
No, I'm just in a good mood. I'm fresh off
of vacation.

Speaker 1 (00:29):
Hey, what was that looking like?

Speaker 2 (00:33):
Girl? I cut up so bad on them people boat.
I went on a cruise, and I'm not a cruise
girl because I always end up sick. But this time
I started taking my druma met a day before and
I was taking it just twice a day the whole time,
and I never got sick. And I just must have
drank liquor all day for fold age straight?

Speaker 1 (00:56):
Did y'all have the top shelf package?

Speaker 2 (00:58):
And I should have got a pack. I did not
get a package, and that was a mistake.

Speaker 1 (01:04):
So you just on the boat buying liquor.

Speaker 2 (01:06):
I was. I was swiping other people sell a car.

Speaker 1 (01:12):
Where the boat left for. I don't really like cruises
like that. I only been on a cruise one time.

Speaker 2 (01:16):
Though I'm not a huge fan of them either, because
it just feels even though the ships are huge, they're
like a little floating city almost, you just still feel confined.
It's like you living in the mall or something.

Speaker 1 (01:31):
So the one cruise I went on was leaving out
of Charleston. Y'all, just imagine how country that was. And
it's like everybody from North Carolina, Virginia, South Carolina was
on this cruise. I think the Lick Cruises be leaving
like from.

Speaker 2 (01:43):
Miami, and shit, yeah that's where we left.

Speaker 1 (01:46):
And I have no no balcony, Like we booked it
last minute. It was like the hole in the wall,
like the hole, like the window in the wall, like
the circle. M you gotta have a balcony on.

Speaker 2 (01:58):
Your cruise, I said.

Speaker 1 (02:00):
Like I was stuck in a cheap motel on the
fucking ocean.

Speaker 2 (02:02):
Bitch, you gotta have a balcony. I won't go on
one if I can if I don't have a balcony,
because I gotta have a place on my who smoke it, girl,
My axe was selling drugs on the boat.

Speaker 1 (02:16):
And I mean, like for real, they got a jail
on the boat. There's their laws on the ocean.

Speaker 2 (02:21):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (02:21):
Them people could do what they want. It's people who
have come up missing on them.

Speaker 2 (02:25):
Oh yeah, somebody get thrown overboard. Me tell you there's
a there's a jail on there.

Speaker 1 (02:30):
Though.

Speaker 2 (02:30):
You cut up, they'll put you in jail. They got
security and they all arrest you. I know for a fact,
not because I got arrested, but I know somebody who did.
And they was locked up the whole cruise.

Speaker 1 (02:39):
That's crazy. This nigga was smoking weed in the cabin.
The people came to the door. It was like, mister
so and so are you in there? Are you smoking
weed in the cabin? And he like got real crunk
on them, like real nasty. That's how That's how I
knew in our relationship when he would be lying because
he got people get real angry. Yeah, like you he

(03:01):
got tha crawled on those people. Know damn well, he
in the room smoking girl exactly.

Speaker 2 (03:07):
I was danti. I got a video I'm probably posted
on We talked back page on the story. I like,
my knees is back good. I don't know if that
liquor had them oiled up without was getting to the
flow at the party in the whole time in the water.
I spent like three hours in the water, like in
the water. I've never done that before. It was a pool,

(03:30):
a beach club, and it was called the Hideaway Pool Club.
And you know, I got the bar in the water.
I had a time.

Speaker 1 (03:39):
That's on the boat or wherever y'all doted.

Speaker 2 (03:41):
That was in Bahamas or it was like called Cococaine
or something like that. It's an island, it's not I
don't know if it's not the Bahamas. I think the
island is owned by the cruise line. Hmmm, I don't know.
I might be wrong. But it was good. It wasn't Carnival.
We were on Royal correct, oh roy Okay, Yeah, and

(04:02):
it was a nice time. We had a good time.
Everybody got along, so it's fun.

Speaker 1 (04:08):
What about daddy My daddy wife, she works for a
shipping company and they own like cruises like we can
get like family discounted, like luxury cruises, like even like
shit in Europe. You just gotta fly, you know, to
catch the cruise or whatever. But yeah, I don't never
be having nobody who want to really go on a cruise.
I asked my boyfriend about it, and the Nigga started

(04:29):
sending me like all of these ships turned upside down
in the ocean.

Speaker 2 (04:35):
It is harry the idea, especially when you go out
on that balcony at night and all you see is
the vast, black, pitch black ocean. It makes you realize
how small you are for real.

Speaker 1 (04:48):
Yes, yes, Like it wasn't until the end of the
cruise I was on it. I realized that, bitch, we
could have died. It could have been some real Titanic shit,
Like you literally are so helpless in the middle of
the oce.

Speaker 2 (05:01):
And if a storm hit, y'all just rocking, you know. Yeah.
I met this to this guy. He was a security guard.
He was from South Africa. He was in love with
me on that boat. First of all, I was having
my way or it was some white boys on there.
These white boys was kind of fire, y'all. They're trying
to get me to getting at Jakuzi with him, but
I ain't doing it. I came back with the same
amount of pussy I left with. I'm so proud of myself.

(05:22):
But he said, if I want to go on another cruise,
he'll get it. So if you would to go on
the cruise, I'll take you. I gotta go back to
the same place because that's the only place he going
for the next six months. But if you want to go,
we could go.

Speaker 1 (05:32):
They living on the ship, you know what. I'm old
people live on a cruise ship instead of paying rent places.

Speaker 2 (05:37):
But yeah, he lives on like he works on his boat.
It's a six month contract, so he just lived there
for six months.

Speaker 1 (05:42):
Well, he's telling him at security, nigga, Yeah, okay, yeah,
we can use his employee discount for Royal Caribbean. But yeah,
but that was nothing much this weekend. Man, Like my
daddy in the hospital, y'all. You know you're getting when
your parents started getting sick of shit like that. It's
just you know, I was talking to one of my

(06:04):
homegirls and you know, I guess sounding regular, and she
was like, girl.

Speaker 2 (06:08):
I know you were scared.

Speaker 1 (06:08):
I'm like, no, like this is literally a part of life. Yeah,
you know what I'm saying. And I feel like the
first time your parents get real, real sick, you start
preparing for stupid shit. Like my daddy definitely gonna be around,
but his body's just breaking down. He's just getting older
and older older. Yeah, dad just turned seventy five.

Speaker 2 (06:28):
But yeah, that's he getting up there.

Speaker 1 (06:31):
Hell yeah, man, But seventy five, like we are not
living longer than our elders, like they still outliving us.
Seventy five is still a long time.

Speaker 2 (06:41):
Yeah, you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 (06:43):
It's a lot of people, younger people who have been
passing and I and our elder still around here kicking
it with diabetes and everything else.

Speaker 2 (06:51):
Yeah, I just want to avoid that that I don't
want to be. I knock a wood because diabetes is
just like crazy in our community.

Speaker 1 (06:58):
Absolutely. I don't realize how how bad it is and
like it literally, like it's serious. It's very very seas
My daddy's diabetic, So of course that's where it starts,
right m hm. But you got we gotta take care
of ourselves, man, We gotta eat better as as as
young adults. You know what I'm saying. I got to

(07:19):
work out because I don't want to be old, alive
and sick. I don't I don't want that. We want that,
and I don't want people to have to care for me.
And y'all shout out to my stop shout out to
my stamp mama. Only a couple of years older than me,
because man, that is she is she there for my daddy?
Okay when I can't be thank god, you know what

(07:40):
I'm saying, Like I have to heavily this worry about
my mama. You know what I'm saying. But yeah, she
she she's do that's blessing. Yes, I'm grateful for her.

Speaker 2 (07:51):
Yes, let's get in the sense. You see this this
woman she went on Beyon Internet because saying that women
should ask permission, but for using someone else's husband to
grab something high off the grocery store shelf. And these
two women approached her husband and asks that could they

(08:14):
please excuse me, sir, could you please help me get
that off the top shelf. I'm vertically challenged. They didn't
say all of that, but I mean it was evident
that they were sure. And she said that her husband
looked at her and then she looked at him and
gave him the okay that he could do it. But
she feels like women should ask the woman, can your
husband help me? Versus just saying it to the actual man.

Speaker 1 (08:38):
And if you ugly just say that girl cheated on you. Yes,
you feel small your damn self, because right you that insecure.

Speaker 2 (08:51):
That a woman can't even what's yeah, like, you can't
They can't ask for help. They say, excuse me, sir,
can I have a piece of or dig they want
some grits off the top shit for something like that.
God damn.

Speaker 1 (09:02):
If I see any woman struggling to do anything and
I got a capable man next to me, I'm actually
sending him over there to help you, right what we'll
be talking about?

Speaker 2 (09:11):
And if he don't, I'm like, i'n be like, what's
wrong with you? Why aren't you helping? You? See them
right there? I'm sure too, motherfucking help all of us.

Speaker 1 (09:21):
Weirdol. She's a weirdo.

Speaker 2 (09:23):
Man, that's weird.

Speaker 1 (09:24):
Man. Listen, if you could bag him, you can have them.
You cannot be that in sahre man. You know what
I'm saying. He's going to fuck who you want to
fuck anyway. You cannot control people in that manner. And
then to go on the internet and talk about it
like you got your man in check, like he know better, that's.

Speaker 2 (09:38):
Even more whack, right, that's worse. Yeah, that's the worst
part of it. Where's your boss, sir? Where's your boss at?
Because you had to look at her to help. It's crazy, your.

Speaker 1 (09:53):
Little regular day glass face. Anyway, No, you.

Speaker 2 (09:56):
Said something else before we recorded. You said, don't ask
your man.

Speaker 1 (10:00):
Oh, don't ask my man for no fucking money. Okay,
don't ask listeny. Don't no nigga that I'm associated with
should a friend be asking them for money? Okay? And
let me tell you I got a city. I have
a friend who asked And before we started recording, I

(10:21):
have a friend who asked my daddy to help her
get her car fixed. Before I feel like you want
to suck my daddy, dick, she already did fuck your daddy,
because why the fuck? I don't even know that. No,
I don't even know that this happened. His girlfriend told
me that you asked him to help you fix your car.

Speaker 2 (10:43):
And do you talk to this friend on the phone?
Do y'all communicate? Hell? No, Oh that wasn't because of it.
That what I'm just saying. She ain't say nothing because
she don't talk to you. No.

Speaker 1 (10:56):
At the time, yes, at the time, yeah, of course,
like we have. We don't talk now, but at the time, yes,
this is my friend. So what I'm saying is, why
would my friend that's like you calling Rome my daddy
and asking him to help you fix your car, even
if it's like him he fixed cars, right, My daddy
knows how to fix cars, but never knew that you

(11:18):
called my daddy. His girlfriend felt a way about it
and told me about it.

Speaker 2 (11:23):
Yeah, that is fun.

Speaker 1 (11:24):
That's the ship I'm talking about right there, because you
would ask my daddy for some money, right.

Speaker 2 (11:29):
I'm not me. She's not saying I would ask her.
I would not ask you, daddy.

Speaker 1 (11:34):
I'm kind of explaining perception and like, come on, they
gotta they gotta.

Speaker 2 (11:39):
Know how Sometimes they don't know, and they'll be like,
don't be asking a daddy for money. See, that's the problem.

Speaker 1 (11:48):
You as imploral like plural you right, you asking? Yeah? Yeah,
like why would you be asking my man for money?
Asking any man associated with me for money? I have
a problem with that, and I don't know that you
did that. That's a problem.

Speaker 2 (12:05):
So let me ask you this. My friend, one of
her close friends or her ex husband. They just got
a divorced. He has rental properties. One of her close
friends needed a place to stay and went to her
ex husband for an apartment. She got the apartment but

(12:31):
never paid the rent, so then he called the ex
wife because they still communicate, and was like, I'm about
to evict your friend. She's like, you're about to evict who?
She's like, I talked to this girl all the time,
and she never said that she even came to you
rent to rent a place.

Speaker 1 (12:51):
Now, that's fucked up. That's weird over here.

Speaker 2 (12:56):
Don't I didn't know about the rental. I don't need
to know nothing about the eviction.

Speaker 1 (12:59):
Yeah, that's y'all business. Once y'all have a conversation, and
y'all do business. Do not try to bring me back
into the thing, because why am I just now finding
out that she didn't pay the rent? You done give
her a lease and everything else. Why am I just
finding out that she's even living in your place? Y'all
both kept it for me? For what reason?

Speaker 2 (13:18):
And if she's he claimed, he assumed that she knew. Yeah, like,
that's your friend you talk to all the time. I
just assume that you knew.

Speaker 1 (13:30):
Interesting.

Speaker 2 (13:31):
But I wanted to let you know that I'm about
to put your friend out.

Speaker 1 (13:33):
You know, My thing is, see see you have to
Why would you not tell me that you hitting up
my ex husband for a place to live, or why
would you not say don't. Don't Derek got some apartments
or whatever, got some places. You think he got something
for rent? Like, why would that not be a conversation,
especially when you talk to me right exactly? Why would

(13:56):
you circumvent me to then not pay him the rent? Right?

Speaker 2 (14:00):
So?

Speaker 1 (14:01):
Yeah, see that type of ship right there, it's weird
old shit.

Speaker 2 (14:05):
Yeah, that's weirdo weird. Sure, but getting the grists off
the top, that's fine. Helping you carry your twocase down
the steps, that's fine, you know, like right, you ain't tripping.

Speaker 1 (14:19):
Yeah, So the Internet is coming from one of my
Gemini Brotherren or whatever you call it, Masika. She's a
Gemini two child, Masika. You owed me fifty seven dollars.
I had bought a raffle from her one time for
like some shit she was doing online and she never
like followed through with the raffle.

Speaker 2 (14:37):
Bit.

Speaker 1 (14:37):
You owe me fifty seven dollars. So how much of
it the ship was? Fifty dollars plus? Never?

Speaker 2 (14:42):
What was it for?

Speaker 1 (14:44):
Like apple products, like apple like raffling, like roundless time,
like a Christmas one year or something like that. She
was doing something, Yeah, she never she never did.

Speaker 2 (14:55):
The raffle, right, niggas was just waiting.

Speaker 1 (14:58):
It's fun raising right, croudfriending. Yeah. So recently her estranged
husband passed away, so people online are like questioning her
because she just recently posted a picture posted up with
another man, her current boyfriend, so the post says. The

(15:18):
Sekret responds after social users questioned her grieving the passing
of her a strained husband, says people don't realize her
new man Bino may be helping her. She said, I
have to continue to living my fucking life. This is
what the caption says. But when he this guy passed
like a month ago, right it was? I feel like

(15:39):
it was just like a month and a half ago.
A couple of weeks ago, the headline came out that
he had he had died, and she like put out
this super heartfelt message of online letter to him, Darris
my darish Jamar.

Speaker 2 (15:54):
Did it have dashes in it?

Speaker 1 (15:59):
Why do you say that.

Speaker 2 (16:01):
If it's a dash in it? At gpt ro dishes.
Anytime I see a dash, which you ain't right, it's
funk out of here girl.

Speaker 1 (16:08):
When I tell you that, that is a whole conversation
I just had with somebody because my friend is falling
out with a friend, and we know this friend can't
really talk that well, and she sent all this crazy
ass responses like with all these bitch don't know, normal
person just be using all these hyphens and the longer hyphen,

(16:31):
the one that's a little piece of longer like whatever
that is the dash Nobody uses that in the real
English language for real when.

Speaker 2 (16:40):
They nobody's that is super formal. And if I see
a lot of dot dots, I think you took the
dash out and put that there. But it's okay.

Speaker 1 (16:50):
We onto yall, niggas, We.

Speaker 2 (16:55):
Argue your motherfucker.

Speaker 1 (16:56):
We onto you niggas, because like, listen, man, if you
you are allowing chat ept to formulate your thoughts, when
are you thinking.

Speaker 2 (17:06):
Well, you know, I use chat GPT too, though I.

Speaker 1 (17:08):
Do, everybody does. It depends on how you're using it,
you know what I'm saying. Right, you clearly didn't have
a response to none of this shit, so you let
jack jackie. You basically put she basically put my homegirl's
text messages in chat ept and allowed chat Gypt to
then think for her to respond to her. Yeah, that

(17:30):
is you're we are very much so digressing as a people. Used,
But yeah, I don't. I mean, I don't know if
they were so actively married. It's just so weird though.
Have you seen the guy she's with now? No, he's
just like a young ass y in well he ain't

(17:51):
got no facial here, nah, and got a mouthful of
gold teeth.

Speaker 2 (17:56):
Everybody listen, I don't question nobody grieving. Everybody grieve different.
Everybody goes through their grooving process different. I don't even
think her and that man was together at the time,
but that still didn't make it hurt that her baby,
you know, her husband, she was in love with him
at some point.

Speaker 1 (18:12):
Yeah, and they have kids together, right, so is it
two kids? They might have two kids together. Yeah, But
looking at I was about to talk about her guy,
so looking at him, it just reminds me of the
guy that what's the girl delicious? You seen delicious boyfriend?

Speaker 2 (18:29):
Mm hmm.

Speaker 1 (18:30):
Where they going at with these la gangsters? What these niggas?
These niggas is killers.

Speaker 2 (18:39):
I'm at her that type man. I used to like
them when I was younger. I don't want no more
of that shit.

Speaker 1 (18:43):
Girl, I'm good. Did you want in jail? The niggas
doant something to go to?

Speaker 2 (18:48):
Jail.

Speaker 1 (18:48):
They don't look like they not going to jail.

Speaker 2 (18:51):
One of my friends, her homegirls, she fucking with some
gangster and she is like, a really, she's Green. She's
not in no street chicks, She's Mary Green. A bullet
grazed her head in the car with him. I'm talking
about she got a bullet burned on the side of
her head where she got grazed.

Speaker 1 (19:11):
By morning, and you.

Speaker 2 (19:13):
Still fucking with him. Whatever bullet you get next. You
know you know what I'm saying, like, leave that man alone.
He's gonna get you killed. Are you crazy.

Speaker 1 (19:24):
Think about going to jail? Like what? Dying never crossed
my mind? Because I'm not about to be right around
with the Yian. I'm gonna meet his ass everywhere.

Speaker 2 (19:35):
You nowhere, there's nowhere you can't take the mind.

Speaker 1 (19:38):
I'll meet you.

Speaker 2 (19:40):
No, we're not going not to eat a bullet.

Speaker 1 (19:43):
Did you hear what I said? A bullet or to
all of that happening? You just fucking with a Wiian.
I'm not pulling like I'll meet you. I'm not getting
in the car with you. If you really are, If
I even think you living like that girl, I fucking
with you.

Speaker 2 (19:59):
If I think like that and now you got great.
I wouldn't it. Ain't no dick that will let me
want me to get grazed by a bullet on my face,
on her face, bitch, she got yeah nah?

Speaker 1 (20:13):
And how old is she?

Speaker 2 (20:15):
Almost forty? Girl?

Speaker 1 (20:18):
By you remember, bitches thought it was cute for a
niggat to smash them with the with the pistol. I
would see people post stuff like that, like what they
want they they not have sex with them, but with
the pistol in his hand, Like fucking them with the
pistol in their hand.

Speaker 2 (20:33):
Bitches is nut using.

Speaker 1 (20:35):
The pistol to smash them, but just you know, having
it on them. I guess. I don't know, like I've
never been into that type of stupidity.

Speaker 2 (20:43):
No, that's weird, No, thank you.

Speaker 1 (20:50):
So apparently the men's the men's the guys they would
like to invoke financial celibacy. Okay it what's that? I
think we should wait a little while if I give
you a dollar, basically like we be waiting to fuck.

Speaker 2 (21:08):
Listen, listen, babe, I fuck with you. But I'm just
not ready for all of that, okay.

Speaker 3 (21:13):
Not.

Speaker 1 (21:16):
Because I always like men value their pop pocket and
we value our pussy. So we know that, but we
still want you to give us the money.

Speaker 2 (21:25):
How how do you make me right? Just what you said?

Speaker 1 (21:29):
Put the Yeah, just put the tipping. Let me get
that car so I can put the tip of it
in the ATM just to tick. And we treated like
some pussy like, yeah, I just want to sort of tipping.

Speaker 2 (21:42):
Let me tap one time. Just let me tap.

Speaker 3 (21:47):
Just give me the last four digits the last don't
have the last four digits? Yeah, baby baby, let me
get that up off you. Yeah, that's all I'm laying.
Biggas started acting like they own financial celibacy. I met
the finessing yo, baby yo, slippy, let me let me
put that.

Speaker 1 (22:09):
Anytime a nigga text me they miss me, I'm like,
you never gave me money. How do you miss me?
Men only miss women that they have invested in. That
nigga does not miss you. You're just trying to finesse
this phone. You don't miss me. You never gave me
any money. You do not miss me. Does that make
sense to you?

Speaker 2 (22:27):
No, what you're saying don't make sense.

Speaker 1 (22:30):
You cannot possibly, nigga, we've been chatting. However, we've been chatting.
We've been texting whatever. We might talk on the phone
a few times, and you text me and tell me
you miss me. You don't miss me. You never gave
me any money.

Speaker 2 (22:46):
Missing somebody work.

Speaker 1 (22:48):
Yes, it is men like like. I just feel like
as a man like, dude, if I was a man like,
I'm not really missing you. I'm trying to fuck I'm
trying to do something right.

Speaker 2 (23:03):
Like.

Speaker 1 (23:03):
The people that I really miss are the people I
gave money to. Those are the women I love you,
see what I'm saying, Like, those are the people I
really fuck with. If I never gave you money, bitch,
I don't fuck with you. If a nigga never gave
you money, he don't fuck with you. That not true.

Speaker 2 (23:21):
No, I agree. If they're not invested in you, they
probably don't care about you. But I don't think that.
Don't mean they don't miss you any bitch that they
can deal with that they don't have to give money.
I think they would probably miss a lot.

Speaker 1 (23:38):
Nah, you never gave me no money.

Speaker 2 (23:39):
You don't miss me because you were.

Speaker 1 (23:44):
You said, because I was easy.

Speaker 2 (23:46):
Yeah, I'd mean like, if they never give.

Speaker 1 (23:51):
You money, you were very the God's damn.

Speaker 2 (23:56):
No, I'm just saying like not you per se just
like you yeah like yeah, like you're very miserable because
you were easy to obtain and keep on. I didn't
have to spend no money exactly.

Speaker 1 (24:10):
Men do not miss women they had to spend no
money with, not for real. They just maybe they don't
want to spend money with the person they know they
got to spend money with, so they come into your
discount pussy green backs.

Speaker 2 (24:31):
What were we talking about this week.

Speaker 1 (24:33):
And talk about the broke friend you know, I mean
it broke bestI like either, And.

Speaker 2 (24:42):
We're not talking about yourll kids. We're talking about your
real friends.

Speaker 1 (24:48):
And maybe at some point you've been to broke best
in life.

Speaker 2 (24:51):
I've definitely been to broke best before. Let's talk about it.
We'll be right back, all.

Speaker 1 (25:00):
Right, y'all, Today we are talking about your broke bestie.
Vacation season is gonna be coming out very much soon
or maybe y'all are planning some share right now. Y'all
know that list's gonna get real short, never be time
exactly by the time the vacation ends up coming, you
might end up going by your damn self and your
one other homegirl who has the money that's one part

(25:21):
of the broke bestie conversation. But I don't think that
you have to stop being friends with somebody just because
y'all in different tax prackets.

Speaker 2 (25:35):
Basically, No, I think you just have to know your
personnel for real, Like it's some friends that you're gonna
invite to do certain things, in some friends you're not,
because you just might know that right now, they ain't
got it. So we was all, let me just say this.
We was on the trip, and they was making like,

(25:58):
I've known these girls for a long time, right, And
they was making fun of me because all right, at
this stage in our life, the bill come, we just
split it evenly. We ain't itemizing shit, We ain't seeing
who had what. It's just like we counted up and
just chop it up. But they was making fun of
me because at one time I'd be like, somebody owes

(26:20):
me a dollar seventy nine cents more, I don't know,
Like we did the math and I'm still a dollar
seventy nine cents short. Like I used to penny pitch
to the to the t to the exact coin. But
at that time in my life, which was I was
a young woman and I didn't have, like want any

(26:43):
financial freedom. I was living hand to mouth. I don't
know if you know what that means, but like, yeah, girl,
now you aj goddamn the listeners you're looking at me?
Who look at I don't know, not you, but like

(27:04):
you know when I get it, you know. And I
didn't really have a huge support system where I could
be like, hey, I'm I don't have no money, you know.
So that's why I feel like I had to be
like very conscious about how I spent every penny that
I got. You know, as I grew older and more
financially stable, that was able to change. But my back

(27:26):
then they'd be like, damn, it's only two dollars. I
need my two dollars, bitch of value. I can go
to Wendy's and get you know, nine your nincent man.

Speaker 1 (27:41):
My one of my ex best friends, you know. Now,
my mama, we definitely weren't rich, right, but my mom
she's very very good with money, and she ain't buying
shit you don't need. Okay, So people living in the hood,
they probably had way more shit than I had grown up,

(28:03):
but we grew up in a in a home. My
mom was paying a mortgage on right. But I had
a friend and this is from through from high school
to college to you know, grown grown age adult, you know,
early twenties and shit like that. But I felt like
she just always resented me because I had it and
not even a lot, right, because at some point we

(28:25):
all started working. So if I we were like going
out to dinner and she's like that, if she have it,
I got it, and vice versa. Right, But at some
point I think my income elevated quicker than hers, like
finishing college or in college, you know what I'm saying,
So I can remember, like just I never if I
got it, you can have it. That goes really for anybody,

(28:47):
you know what I'm saying. If somebody asked you for
something and I can stand it, I'm gonna give it
to you for sure. I remember standing in Express with
her and I asked her. I think it was for
like literally some a dollar and some change. When I
tell you, she hounded me. And I had spent so
much money on this bitch over the years. It was

(29:09):
literally like two dollars or some change. She was hounding
me for it.

Speaker 2 (29:13):
How old were y'all at this point?

Speaker 1 (29:15):
We probably was like I don't know, twenty twenty twenty,
like twenty like twenty years old. But girl, you got
here in my car on my gas you know, like,
I'm not trying to calculate up on a bitch, But
come on, now, two dollars you about to hand me
for two dollars?

Speaker 2 (29:35):
So what she asked you for the two dollars back?

Speaker 1 (29:38):
Yes, she did, and I got annoyed very fast, and
I did give her her two dollars back. And this
is probably the first time I ever spoken about this
out loud. But that's some bumshit, bitch.

Speaker 2 (29:53):
I understand he was growth like that makes me think
of me like eighteen years old in college. I don't
have any need money. That two dollars is dinner, make money.

Speaker 1 (30:04):
You got my money. Do you see what I'm saying?
My money is your money. At some point you gonna
get these This is the way she was hounding me
for these two dollars. At some point you're gonna get
them two dollars out of me.

Speaker 2 (30:17):
It's crazy two dollars too.

Speaker 1 (30:20):
I knew you were exact. I hope you were exaggerated.

Speaker 2 (30:23):
I'll the amount, but.

Speaker 1 (30:26):
It was for real two dollars. And that's something like
my money is your money. So at some point you're
gonna get these two dollars out of me? Are you
really have nothing else in your pocket right now and
you need these two dollars? I probably needed to hear
that to be okay with how she was hounding me.

Speaker 2 (30:40):
Well, maybe that's what the case was, though, because when
you when you're college age and you don't come from
like wealth, college kids be broke.

Speaker 1 (30:53):
I used to everybody was broke, but she was fucking
I had a nigga who was bringing me a car
so I could drive home gas. Like you know what
I'm saying, Like, Yeah, that is the difference. You see
what I'm saying, Like, at some point my mama stopped
doing for me in college, right and my freshman year
in college I had to fend for myself. We got

(31:14):
the same shit going on. Why are you broken? You
having sex?

Speaker 2 (31:18):
No? I agree there, what.

Speaker 1 (31:21):
Is happening so you could get money? You sitting on it?

Speaker 2 (31:25):
But that's prosecution, Scott. Don't tell the girls that. Not
if you're in college and your dating someone just as
broke as you. Y'all are two broke students, y'all just
trying to figure it out and make it work and
rubbing pennies together. I remember me and my friend Stephanie
going to Wendy's and I think we had three dollars

(31:47):
between the two of us. Dude, like that was it.
We were so broke, you know, And we went and
got Wendy's Value menu and split a cheeseburger and half
is split nuggets like this niggas was broke. Yeah, we
were sitting on but we wasn't.

Speaker 1 (32:05):
We wasn't selling pussy, Like it's not selling pussy. He
can at least take you to Walmart. He can at
least take you to get something to eat. I guess,
I don't know. I definitely had.

Speaker 2 (32:15):
But you were probably dealing with boyfriend.

Speaker 1 (32:17):
And I had a boyfriend outside of college. Yes, you
gotta get to all what get a girlfriend.

Speaker 2 (32:23):
At the time, it was broker than me. He was
from New York and he was like he was cold
at BA house and wash clothes like we was poor,
you know. So I mean college students. We're talking about
your eighteen nineteen years old, so you just were young.
But once you get a little older, I think you
start switching up how you move when it comes to money.

Speaker 1 (32:48):
Yeah, because you know, as we grow our money grows
in or should mm hmm, And friendships can't always keep up, right,
So I have a friend right now, Oh I don't
be knowing who'll be listening nowadays, like personally.

Speaker 2 (33:06):
Right, yeah, but you're not dropping no names.

Speaker 1 (33:08):
So yeah, but she just recently got ousted from a
baby shower because she was acting on some broke shit.
Whereas this friend threw her an entire baby shower, and
now it's her time. She's having another baby, and somebody
else is throwing a baby shower and they're collectively put

(33:29):
money in the pot like to do different things. She
just didn't have it to do anything right, and everybody
understood that. So she was asked to do like some task,
so she said, okay about the yeah, yeah exactly. So
she told the person who asked her to do the task,
like can you pick up the cake or whatever? She
told that person yeah. But then she told somebody else

(33:50):
that they trying to low girl her. That's an internal problem, right,
Nobody is low girling you. Nobody even knows that this
has happened, right, But this is how you're feeling because
your money fucked up right now, and instead of you
just recognizing that because everybody else recognizes it, and they're
not putting pressure on you for any you know, financial contribution.

(34:13):
They have some tasks you can still contribute. It doesn't
have to be monetary, right, But that's the ego. That's
an ego thing right there, that's would be that's accountability.

Speaker 2 (34:28):
You know.

Speaker 1 (34:28):
It's a lot of different things wrapped up in there.
But one thing that is not is not your friend's fault. Right,
So if comments was made shit like her and all
her friends, they be high rolling. They gotta do this,
they gotta do that. So when you start like critiquing
what other grown thirty forty year old people are doing
are able to do and you're not able to do it,

(34:50):
that doesn't make they're not wrong for being an adult,
you know what I'm saying and trying to live life.
Because first of all, a lot of people be having
Hella bills, right, but they gonna live first, which I
agree with, fucking bills a little bit, fuck them a
little bit, but yeah, live also, right. But she's just
right now, she's just in between blessings. You're not broke.

(35:13):
You're in between blessings broke. This is a state of
mind right, you just broke. You ain't trying to do
nothing to get out of that. And the thing is that, y'all.
I like listening to Reverend Ike. Reverend Ike said if
you if you curse the rich, you'll never be one. Okay,
So you can't just be talking shit. I don't believe

(35:33):
in a non prosperous god. I don't want to go
to no church where the preacher broke, Okay. I don't
want to go to no hospital where the doctor broke.

Speaker 2 (35:42):
Like.

Speaker 1 (35:43):
I don't want no broke shit because that is not
my state of mind.

Speaker 2 (35:46):
Right.

Speaker 1 (35:47):
I believe should be compensated and be making money and
be very prosperous. That's what I'm That's the energy I'm
fucking with, Like that type of energy that is broke
bitch energy. For sure, you're thinking this is not gonna
This is not where you're going to be. Always so
congratulate and appreciate and show gratitude until you get to
where you're going.

Speaker 2 (36:08):
Have you ever had like something really good happened for
you and somebody that you thought was gonna be celebrating
allow us was real quiet?

Speaker 1 (36:17):
Yes, absolutely, and sometimes it could be a motherfucker with money, right,
it's just still the thing's not happening for them, so
they can even you know, be happy for you in
that moment.

Speaker 2 (36:29):
You know, effort. I've had that happen and at first
I was feeling a way, but then I, you know what,
I decided not to take it personal because it wasn't
about me. You know, whatever they were, whatever they were feeling,
was an internal thing, and I did not take it
personal at the time. I just was like, you know what,
everybody going through their own shit. I don't know what

(36:50):
she's going through right now.

Speaker 1 (36:51):
She might exactly.

Speaker 2 (36:52):
You know.

Speaker 1 (36:54):
I think a lot of times if we just stepped
back and realized, most shit don't got nothing to do
with you. Lot of things right and the things that do,
you know what got to do with you. But a
lot of times things the way people feel it do
start with them internally. And even if you feel like
you are, like this feeling is warranted right still, so

(37:15):
you can stay on top of your blessings. Make it
you the problem, just make I am learning to be
the problem, and I'm okay with that shit. It's my fault.

Speaker 2 (37:25):
Let me tell you all this. And this is me
being vulnerable and metting at a time where I was
like Loki hating on my friend one time. Well, this
is job, I'm a human, this is me being honest,
all right. So at that time, me and her would
like share designer bags, right, we would swap out if

(37:47):
her bag mashed my office bar. You know, girls, barshit,
somebody broke into my house and stole a bunch of
shit out of my apartment and her bag got stolen.
So I had to replace her bag, which was like
almost three grand, and I gave her her money. You know,

(38:10):
you know, I pay my debts, so I pay her.
And she was calling me to show me the new
bag she bought with the money I just sent her,
and I was like, bitch, I don't even want to
see it. And I was just like, I don't want
to see that motherfucking bag. Bitch, I don't. And I

(38:32):
felt like I like she kind of felt salty that
I wasn't happy about her new bag. But I am
always happy when you get something new, Like, yes, my
friend called that she you know, she bossy, but when.

Speaker 1 (38:46):
It's you felt like you bought it. Yeah, I felt
like I bought that shit. I'm looking at this guy
because I'm trying to think that if my friend got robbed,
would I charge her for my stolen item. I don't
know that I would, because at this point I probably
paid for it myself. Okay, right, and now I'm asking

(39:09):
her to cough up three thousand dollars for the bag.
I don't know. I don't know. Let's file this insurance clan. See,
we can get this goddamn money.

Speaker 2 (39:17):
I know.

Speaker 1 (39:17):
If I don't know, I think I would just eat it. Honestly,
I think I would have just ate it. I don't
know if I would have made. I think that you,
if you were the one that this shit got stolen from,
you would want your three bands too. Yeah, yeah, see,
And this is where like, okay, you can understand where
you're listen.

Speaker 2 (39:36):
And that's why I paid my desk. Listen, I had it,
I was responsible for somebody stole it from me. Listen,
I replace what I you know, but don't call me
bout no new shit you got with my three bands.
I don't want to hear it. Now.

Speaker 1 (39:51):
Let me tell you how I know this bitch, you
want them three thousand dollars because when we first started
this podcast, okay, we was using some wine glass. Is
this bitch's house. When I tell y'all, tell me ask
how me for a month to replace her broken wine glass.
She did that. He on the other hand, I would
just bought me a new wine glass. That's just it.

(40:13):
It was an accident.

Speaker 2 (40:15):
It was like an accident. Did you remember?

Speaker 1 (40:18):
I sure did. On the way to record one day,
you reminded me via text message, and I stopped right
at the I think it was the container store, createing barrel,
praying barrel, crateing fucking barrel.

Speaker 2 (40:29):
You know.

Speaker 1 (40:32):
Her wine glass?

Speaker 2 (40:33):
Okay, it was one glass and they wasn't even exclusive
glasses either, but they're so cute. I can't wait wait
to move back in mind.

Speaker 1 (40:41):
Girl, I'm not I'm just going to replace my ship
like I don't have people break so much shit if
I really really love it. I feel like you should
take the initiative, initiative and go replace my ship. But
I'm not about to ask you to if it was
an accident, but I feel like you should automatically do it.
Like well, I feel like you offered to repla though

(41:01):
I did not.

Speaker 2 (41:02):
No, you never did.

Speaker 1 (41:05):
I might have. Even if I offered. You shouldn't have
held me to God, damn bitch, damn my glass. You
haven't brought my glass, Like, let me get your glass
instead of four, now it's three. It's like a wino, right,
I need my glass.

Speaker 2 (41:27):
Yeah. But yeah, So a friend who maybe I was
hating a little bit at that time, but only because
it was my money. If it was I mean, guess
technically it wasn't my money. It was her money. I
replaced something that belonged to her. But because I had
to fork over that money, it just hurt a little
bit to see because that was in my head, that's
whatever you bought supposed to be mine.

Speaker 1 (41:50):
Right. I could have bought that bag for three bands.
I just bought you a bag for three thousand. Yeah,
I I don't know. That is a lot of money.
That is a high priced item I would have I
would have least settled for fifteen hundred.

Speaker 2 (42:04):
Yeah. But and this is that. That was when I
learned my lesson about exchanging shit with each other, Like,
don't borrow my ship and I ain't borrowing yours because
I do not want to have to replace it if
you gonna miss me.

Speaker 1 (42:19):
Yeah, I really don't, you know. My mama taught me
that a long time ago. Don't be letting people borrow
your shit. Don't you borrows people things? If you need something,
let me know something, you know, I really don't ask
people for personal items.

Speaker 2 (42:31):
I have.

Speaker 1 (42:32):
I have a lot of shit went walking out the door.
What people you let hole things? They act like they
forgot to give it to you. You knew you wanted
this ship when I when I let you hold and
when you asked me about it? What you so and
so at let me borrow that? When you asked me
about it, you was already plotting on accidentally taking that
shit three hours back to your fucking house. But I

(42:56):
feel like I have had a friend who I'm no
longer friends with. She had got a large settlement from
a car accident she got into, like a real bad
car accident when she got really fucked up, and like
during the time from this accident, it might have been
like a year and a half where she was waiting
on this settlement. Our relationship like plummeted during that time.

(43:19):
Like I was going through like a bad ass breakup
at the time, her and her boyfriend and they were
trying to get like stable and then they actually they
were engaged to they were trying to get stabled and
with housing and all that stuff, but they had this
big ass in between blessings. They had this super blessing
coming through, and our relationship just declined at that point.
And I feel like the people who I am no

(43:39):
longer friends with, I know their struggles and I know
like their upbringing, I know how they struggled in life,
and I feel like they couldn't wait to one up
me when that is never my mind said bitch, because
this person couldn't never let me get my hand on

(44:01):
that type of money first and not make sure she
was straight. And not saying that, I like think she
should have made sure I was good, right, But I
just realized that the whole time, our friendship just wasn't
what I thought it was. You know what I'm saying
for money, not even I don't even think it's money.
I think a lot of times, the problems I have

(44:22):
with people, it could be like that's part of it, right,
I have more money in my fucking twenties. Hey, first
of all, I gotta go real hard. You probably the
next ten years you.

Speaker 2 (44:32):
Probably didn't have more money. You just probably got more
financial responsibilities now than you did when you were bitch.

Speaker 1 (44:37):
We still ain't got no turn Like I feel like,
as long as you don't want no kids, you balling,
that's not it. But I just always had my own place,
you know what I'm saying. For the most part, I
have always had bills, Yes, but it's parting.

Speaker 2 (44:51):
The eggs twenty seven dollars back then. Yes, it wasn't
as high as it is all these you know, the
responsibilities have changed. Then you were accruing student loans, now
you're paying them. You're like, just you might've been on
your parents' insurance then now you gotta pay health insurance.
I don't feel care when nobody's saying, once you get

(45:12):
closer to the forty, you going to the doctor way
more you did than you did when you was twenty
years old.

Speaker 1 (45:16):
Why the fuck was Mike Cole paying eighty dollars? Yeah,
primary healthcare visit.

Speaker 2 (45:21):
Yeah, So just shit like that, that shit started adding up.
You're not wearing cheap ass clothes no more.

Speaker 1 (45:30):
Like how girl, we was in college shopping at BB
and ART and B.

Speaker 2 (45:34):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (45:34):
I don't know how to fuck or where we was
like my little friends group where we was getting the
money from, but we was in there BB and R
and b was not fucking cheap. I mean, you're paying
one hundred and twenty five dollars then in college for shirt.

Speaker 2 (45:49):
Right, I don't know. You couldn't tell me shit in
my little art and b I just love that shit.

Speaker 1 (45:55):
Where was we getting the money from? You're putting some
Baker pumps and some Baker pumps. You know what I'm saying.
I don't know. I don't know he was getting money
from for real Express Express ain't never been cheap. No,
I started college with Hella Express. My sister be boosting too, bitch.
I had so much Tommy Hill figure and shit like
that back then.

Speaker 2 (46:18):
My sister was I'm about.

Speaker 1 (46:19):
To say, Phil to kill her. I need some shit
tied again. She not got arrested a couple of times.
She don't do that shit no more. But what was
I saying? Yeah, I don't know. I think it's sometimes
it's the motion, right, just you always have emotion, and
I know I make it look good even if I
don't have it good Like I don't have it, I'm

(46:40):
gonna still make it look like I got in. You
know what I'm saying. I've been big money my whole
life and fucking broke financially, you know people, I would
always be surprised, like when guys or even homegirls like,
I don't know what about me? What makes you think
I got money for you to borrow? Is it not

(47:01):
ever like surprising when somebody calls and ask you for money?

Speaker 2 (47:04):
It is very surprises to me because they know I
ain't giving out no money, like I will get money,
but everybody knows that I'm the very last option.

Speaker 1 (47:13):
Like do I look like a lick? Do I look
like a lick?

Speaker 2 (47:17):
Like?

Speaker 1 (47:18):
Do I look like a safe space that you could?
I ask people for money. I ask men for money,
So why the fuck are you coming over here asking
me for money? Are you okay? Are you okay?

Speaker 2 (47:29):
Okay?

Speaker 1 (47:30):
Are you okay? Group trips so vacation and shit like that. Like,
like I said, the vacation starts with how many people
in the group, and by the end of the damn
I don't know the how many. Ever, four months y'all
got to pay towards this thing. Half the group done
fell out and then be upset when you stop inviting

(47:53):
them places you It's not that I'm now I am
like considering your pockets even when you're not right. So
It's not that I don't want you to do this thing.
I just don't want to put any stress or pressure
on you to do it.

Speaker 2 (48:09):
So I don't even I don't even consider that because
I be feeling like people are an adult. I don't
count people pocket either. You can do it, you're gonna
do it. If you can't, you can't.

Speaker 1 (48:20):
So you're gonna still invite them.

Speaker 2 (48:22):
Yeah, it's up to you to decide how you want
to allocate your money, right, Yeah, so go ahead now.
If you make poor choices, that's on you, baby girl.

Speaker 1 (48:31):
I don't know what to tell you all on the boat,
all on the cruise and then you got rented when
you get back.

Speaker 2 (48:38):
But in the rent Onney is crazy. But I don't
think I have friends that are like we're I think
we're all at of age where we're not making them
ass choices like that.

Speaker 1 (48:48):
I don't know. I feel like some people probably still are,
like they just trying to live right now, and then
they resent it and they have buyers re morse. You know,
when the thing is over and now you're mad at
everybody else but yourself. Sometimes you got to stay in
the house. Yeah, sometimes you gotta sit down. You save
so much money. Well, I don't know now because of

(49:10):
online shopping, bitch, because I be in the dark. Last
night was planning a vacation booking. I don't know how
the fuck I'm about to pay for this ship, bitch.
But I'm out for Christmas.

Speaker 2 (49:21):
Legionary, bitch, huh this year?

Speaker 1 (49:25):
Yeah, yeah, I'm book I booked for the twenty ninth,
twenty exees me the twenty what's the day after Christmas?
Twenty sixth, twenty seventh, so the twenty seventh to January second.
I'm out.

Speaker 2 (49:38):
I know that's right. You're going with your man? Where
you are going?

Speaker 1 (49:44):
Beatos?

Speaker 2 (49:45):
Are you listen? That been on the bucket list? So
I'll let you're going.

Speaker 1 (49:49):
I know, so I've been. I tried to see where
else because the longer you wait, you know, the plane tickets,
everything go up. But I'm out, man, I need a vacation.
I haven't felt like I deserved a vacation in a
long time because I've been just out here doing what
the fuck I want to do. I feel like I
deserve a vacation right now, and I'm taking.

Speaker 2 (50:09):
I always feel like I deserve it. I just got
back and I feel like I deserve another one, all right?

Speaker 1 (50:14):
And restaurants without checking budgets? Do I need to check
with you to see do I need to consider somebody's
pocket before I pick what restaurant we're gonna eat at.
I feel like most of my friends, if we don't
spend money on nothing else, we spend money on food.

Speaker 2 (50:26):
Right, we're gonna go eat or just don't go, like
you don't have to go Like that's the thing I
would listen. I'll let you know up front what I'm
gonna spend. If you invite me to something I'm not,
I'll be like, oh no, I ain't doing all of that.
And then here's my thing. I want to go to everything,

(50:49):
so I like I would to. In just the past
month and a half, I went to New Orleans, now
went to Chicago, New Orleans, New York, Texas. Then the
crew with different bitches for every trip. But I I'm

(51:14):
frugal though, Like, I'm not spending too much every place
because I got bitches. Next week, I'm going somewhere with
so I can't run it up with y'all, but I'm
gonna do enough. You know.

Speaker 1 (51:28):
You feel you do not make your friend feel away, though,
is that even a thing like if you have a
I remember a friend asked me if I wanted to
go out to eat, and this is like when we're
now older. This is the person who actually for the
two dollars back. So now we're a little older, right,
she got a kid, now all this shit. And I
remember calling to ask me if I wanted to go
out to eat because she was in town, and she

(51:50):
was like, and I'm paying for She said, I'm gonna
pay too for once. What is the phrase? Basically she's saying,
and I'm paying because you always was paying for me before, Right,
that's on your mind. I never thought about the only
time I would think about things I paid for is
when she would act selfish.

Speaker 2 (52:06):
Well maybe she was just trying to let you know
she's paying it for it. She want to treat you.

Speaker 1 (52:11):
That was like a good gesture, I guess, But our
friendship ultimately ended up ending really because of like money shit.
Like just I remember when she first got her driver's
license and she was like she sent me a picture
of her license and she was like, don't it look

(52:32):
like don't I look like my mama on this license?

Speaker 2 (52:36):
MH.

Speaker 1 (52:37):
I was like, yeah, like a black panther because she
had her afro. Right, you asked me if you look
like your mama, a fifty sixty something year old lady,
and you got an afro on your driver's license. I
was like, yeah, you look like your mama. Not I
said her mom's name, now, not like your mama. Yeah,
she was like. She messaged me back. She was like,
why because I'm not hidden behind We even makeup. It

(53:00):
was like, Hello, that ain't I ain't never had nobody
taking me to get a driver's license in a car? Hello?
What ain't mad about it? Girls? So all these years,
mind you, I got a car our last year of
high school, and that car got both her and I
to work. That car got both her and I to college.

Speaker 2 (53:18):
Mm hmm.

Speaker 1 (53:19):
Whatever I had, you had, right, But our entire entire friendship,
you have been like tallying up some shit on me
that I'm not right. You're tallying up what I'm able
to do for you. I'm not tallying up what I've
done for you. Yeah, somehow you built resentment towards me

(53:40):
for being capable. Right, that has nothing to do with me.
And I think sometimes if anybody like I shouldn't have
to dumb myself down to ever make anybody else feel
comfortable like this, BO says, don't intentionally flex? How do
you intentionally flex? You gotta always be intentionally doing something

(54:02):
to somebody who can't, because they just gonna be feeling
a way. If they gonna feel the way, it's not
there's no avoiding that, you know what I'm saying, It's
no avoiding that mental illness, because that's what it is.

Speaker 2 (54:14):
It's hating, Like, is there a way that you're flaunting
your wealth or riches? I can't. I don't know. Yeah,
I don't agree with that because I don't.

Speaker 1 (54:25):
Know to be flying, But you would think that it
would be the little things that somebody's so jealous of.
It's your area, your energy, your motion, right, don't add
money on top of that, because I had motion before
I have money. I had the energy before I had
the bag, and I still ain't got no bag, you

(54:47):
know what I'm saying, Like, not the big bag, not
what I consider a bag. I saw. I thought about
this topic because I saw a post online today and
this dude was saying he was like this bitches all
mented on his post, and this shit fucked me up.
She said, he said. The person commented and said, everybody
ain't struggling like I'm all right, and it made him think,

(55:11):
like we like a lot of people like post about
struggling and this, this, this that and the that, this
that and the third going on in life, and that's
not everybody's situation. Situation.

Speaker 2 (55:23):
Yeah, because when I was saying like I was poor
in college, it's some people listening like, I don't know
what that's like. You know, it's probably like we got
listeners that don't have can't identify with being a poor
college too, right, you know.

Speaker 1 (55:35):
So I've always been a hybrid, always been that in
the middle. You know what I'm saying. I never had everything.
I don't feel like I ever had enough of anything.
Have ever missed a meal? Yeah?

Speaker 2 (55:49):
I have.

Speaker 1 (55:50):
As an adult, I have missed. Let me stop lying,
hold on because you got something to eat.

Speaker 2 (55:57):
I don't think I ever missed a meal.

Speaker 1 (55:59):
I think I have. I've never missed a meal. I've
never my LIFs ain't never been off in my house
as a child or as an adult. It's those are
the things I'm a I'm a paid before I do
anything else. That's you're not You're not being responsible. Your
life is the biggest business you'll ever run.

Speaker 2 (56:16):
But I mean, everybody bottom different, you know, so yeah,
what some might consider what I might consider I'm doing well,
I'm wealthy. Is a person out there listening would be like,
if I ever get to that, like coming to America,
maybe one day you can have all of this, And
he was like, that would be something. Yeah, because now

(56:37):
I'm for as fuck right everybody you know, everybody's wealthybody different. Yeah,
but don't I don't think you should, Like, I think
it's mean girl energy to pick your friends based on
how much money they got or how they come and financially.

Speaker 1 (57:00):
Or hear somebody you been friends with for a long time,
you know what I'm saying that, And this is like
you leveled up quicker. Yeah, you know, but I wouldn't
like they can't keep up.

Speaker 2 (57:12):
But you're not. You're not going to discard them because
of that, you know, Like.

Speaker 1 (57:15):
No, absolutely not, but they might discard you, you know
what I'm saying, Like that happens, They might start a
lot of times, people who are really wealthy will tell
you it's not them that change, just the people around
them that changed. People start treating you differently, we don't
even got no bags, but we we we got motion. Right,

(57:37):
people don't treat you differently. Yeah, just thinking you got
some shit going on that you might not.

Speaker 2 (57:44):
Right.

Speaker 1 (57:44):
I always get a surcharge on shit just because I
know Charlemagne, motherfucker always trying to tax me or some shit.
I don't have Charlamagne's money that part. So you know, people,
it's just a thing, right. And I feel like if
success oftentimes either Goner's admiration or a goners hater, like

(58:07):
a hater, you become a hater. And adults just have
a hard time admitting that they fucking hatter, so they
will create reasons to justify the hate. Or she be flexing,
or her and an't her friends, they be doing too much,
Like no, you're not doing enough because you could be
making more money, but you like to lay down. I
like to lay down too. At some point you got

(58:28):
to get.

Speaker 2 (58:28):
Up right, I agree. Or you know what, some people
are okay with not having a lot of money, but
and if you like, I think everybody wants more money.
But I think people some people are okay with like
having just a regular house, a regular job. They can

(58:48):
feed their family, they can make sure their kids are healthy,
absolutely yeah, and they're not trying to go on the yacht.
They're not trying to buy a expensive bags and all that.

Speaker 1 (59:01):
Shit is just I don't do none of that. Mean
I definitely like a low boat trip on Victis, Yeah,
But like all the materialistic things, like I always say,
I want it, I like to buy experiences. It's never
gonna be things and stuff.

Speaker 2 (59:17):
I want both. I love me a good bag, a
good shoe.

Speaker 1 (59:23):
Right now, if I gotta choose, you see what I'm saying, yeah,
and not saying that I really have to choose. I'm
not just living for me. I don't even have kids yet,
but I think about right now, at this age, if
I have a kid, what am I leaving for them?
That's why I'm like, I got a grind for the
next ten years because I did what the fuck I
want I wanted to for the last ten years. So
the next ten years, girl, we're gonna be fucking fifty sixty.

(59:46):
That shit is coming girl. Whatever, girl, it is fucking coming,
and it's coming. So what a full one k looking like? Right?
What a retirement looking like? There's other things to consider
other than yourself and your fun today.

Speaker 2 (01:00:00):
No, I agree.

Speaker 1 (01:00:02):
So if if right now, at this, at that age,
and you still worrying about, you know, not being being
able to eat with your friends or do a vacation
with your friends, when you gonna do something different, I agree.
Were getting older and I feel like there's a certain
like there's just adult shit that people are gonna want

(01:00:22):
to do, and it's nobody else's fault if you can't
do adult shit with them.

Speaker 2 (01:00:28):
This is true. What you're gonna do barbecue mildew.

Speaker 1 (01:00:32):
Yeah, what you're gonna do, barbecue mildewyep, for real, for real.

Speaker 2 (01:00:37):
That's my last last.

Speaker 1 (01:00:39):
My last last is take the trip, bitch. If you
gotta pop some extra pussy to do it, don't do that. Listen,
they fucking anyway, Why would you not? The men know
they gotta come with the offerings.

Speaker 2 (01:00:54):
Y'all.

Speaker 1 (01:00:54):
Do not let these niggas. Oh, you shouldn't be fucking,
You shouldn't go on a trip, and you shouldn't be
having sex. I'm gonna challenge y'all bitches in twenty twenty six,
if you, if your finances are not in order, do
not pop that pussy in twenty twenty six. You do
not deserve to be popping that pussy bottom line, Okay,

(01:01:15):
I do you know what?

Speaker 2 (01:01:16):
Not? Only do you not this? Nobody deserves to be
inside your body if they can't help you, if you're
if you're fucked up out here? Why is anybody inside
your body?

Speaker 1 (01:01:33):
Why you not? Time cannot come thinking about my light built.

Speaker 2 (01:01:41):
Right that part?

Speaker 1 (01:01:42):
I just a loved one to get one hundred dollars
from every nigga she fucking.

Speaker 2 (01:01:47):
I challenge you to do that if she couldn't, can you.

Speaker 1 (01:01:50):
Get I don't know. I didn't never follow up. I
just was like, I just threw it out there, like
I can't be sucking dick to pay your light bil,
because that's how I feel. If I not to say that,
I gotta get this money from this man to do
this thing for this person, but his money is mine too, essentially, right,

(01:02:11):
So if I I am fucking with somebody that I
know that will do anything for me, at some point
I might have to use them to do something for you.
Why I gotta do that when you fucking too?

Speaker 2 (01:02:23):
Yeah, I'm tripping. It's a little prostituting a little bit,
but I get where you're going. Where you're going twenty.

Speaker 1 (01:02:31):
Twenty six challenge, do not pop that pussy if you
ain't popping no bands, okay, and watch out life get
if all. Everything feels so much better when you got
money in the bank. Everything is lit. It feels good
to party with money, It feels good to have sex

(01:02:54):
with money. You have to worry about some shit.

Speaker 2 (01:02:57):
It just will take me where. I also challenged the girl,
don't spend your money on a bunch of things, like
what catch y'all said, don't waste money on the bag
and can't put a bag in it if you can't.
If you're using all your money on stuff, but if
some shit happen, you can't fund your life, that's a problem.

(01:03:20):
Stop doing that. You don't want to just look good,
you really want to be good.

Speaker 1 (01:03:26):
I see that happening of wearing their money.

Speaker 2 (01:03:29):
Like girl got all kind of Chanel bags and all
the shoes, and a nigga was like funding a lot
of this stuff, and then he decided to stop paying
her rent. She was evicted immediately immediately.

Speaker 1 (01:03:46):
What are you doing? The bags are an investment, right,
so you can sell them, But then people be still
trying to hold on the stuff to still look good
for then that whole time their life and fucking shambles.
Probably got a kid out here, just it doesn't make
any sense.

Speaker 2 (01:04:02):
I saw this one girl, she had like all the designer,
all the designer. I'm talking about closet stupid. And then
what was about her business was like she had like
a boutique or something like it. It was folding and
she wanted to GoFundMe. She put up like a gofund
me asking people to give her money. Girl, if you
don't sell all that shit, you got all that, but

(01:04:22):
you're want to keep it. You want to keep all
that stuff and use everybody else money. No start over
with that. You have what it? That's why when on
What's That Show with Mary J. Blige the Tahatas and
they was like trying to come up with.

Speaker 1 (01:04:38):
How was that right? I've been wearing design and shit
for thirty seasons straight. Now admit that knowing guitar sweater,
little throat shit you had on bitch, y'all buy it
right now.

Speaker 2 (01:04:51):
I would literally watch the show and take their outfits
and like add it up, remember, and I screenshot and
post the prices of all that shit. Y'all got what
y'all need? Why is y'all killing people. Y'all got this
ship right there.

Speaker 1 (01:05:07):
They one bill away from being a regular nigga. You'll
don't live your life like that man. That ship is
really whack. And I mean, aside from rent life insurance.
Something happening you now. You're trying to get do dinners
and go fundy for a funeral you ask deserve to
be cremated. You did not. Oh, we're gonna We're gonna
make you pay for it. Like did he made Biggie

(01:05:29):
pay for his own funeral. We won't rec that's crazy.
We're gonna recoup it.

Speaker 2 (01:05:37):
Wow, that's time to go.

Speaker 1 (01:05:40):
Yeah, all right, we all enjoyed this episode. Y'all tuned
in every Thursday in the Black Effect. I heart Radio Apple.
Where the fuck you get your podcasts at this jo
go host a j holiday two play old on instagrams.
Kick a Tam.

Speaker 2 (01:05:53):
Y'all its official Tam Bam on Instagram. Y'all follow We
Talked Back podcast on Instagram. I love y'all so much,
and I really appreciate y'all for joining us every week
and being our homegirls and listen to us, listening to
us talk ran about nothing yep every week and I
love y'all for it. Y'all remember speaking now.

Speaker 1 (01:06:13):
I don't know. Never hold no hold yoge wallet, hold
on to some of that money.

Speaker 2 (01:06:19):
Stop running it up.

Speaker 1 (01:06:20):
Don't try to hold your friend accountable for having a bag.
Can't be mad at her.

Speaker 2 (01:06:26):
Bit. Bye, y'all, Deuces.

Speaker 1 (01:06:30):
We Talk Back Podcast is the production of iHeartRadio. Visit
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