October 2, 2025 • 58 mins
In this episode of We Talk Back, AJ Holiday and Tam Bam reflect on their uneventful weekends, their shared love of scary movies, and the recent passing of Assata Shakur, a pivotal figure in Black history. They critique the controversy surrounding a poorly received Tina Turner statue and highlight Young Thug’s surprise community service concert. The conversation dives deep into personal fears—ranging from homelessness and illness to struggles with self-image and parenthood—while examining how authenticity and self-acceptance play critical roles in today’s social media-driven world. AJ and Tam also discuss the nuance of dating, the importance of financial independence, and the courage to ask for help. The episode ultimately encourages listeners to confront their fears head-on as a pathway to personal growth, stronger relationships, and emotional freedom.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to We Talk Back Podcast, the production of iHeartRadio
and the Black Effect Network.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion who talks.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
What's up y'all? Is your girl? AJ? Holiday? What's up? DAYA?
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Damn?
Speaker 1 (00:20):
Hey, y'all? I love y'all so very much. How you doing, AJ?
I'm doing. I'm doing fine. How was your weekend? Girl?
Was supposed to storm and all the stuff. So I've
been waiting for rain all fucking weekend. It didn't happen.
I know storms they were threatened using about, but shit uneventful.
(00:44):
Yeah it did rain. It did rain for us.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
We did get some weather, but it wasn't like what
I was hoping for. I was hoping to be like
rain ding and watching scary movies.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
God, have you seen that movie Him yet? No?
Speaker 2 (00:59):
I wanted to go see it just came out. I
heard it was like really mynic Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
So I saw when I saw the trailer on Instagram,
I commented and I said, you gotta know what you're
looking at when you see it, and like all these
people was commenting, like some people was like on calling
me just from that small line, like I'm a super
conspiracy theorist. From the trailer, I could see hell of shit,
(01:29):
like I know what that movie is about without watching
a movie, and it's real shit. People think they can't
be touched by stuff just because they don't believe in it.
That is not true. I do feel like they be
putting bullshit in these movies, Like I turn shit off
and I hear too much chanting and Latin and shit
like that. I fast forward because what the fuck are
y'all and what you're saying? Yeah? Yeah, And until I
(01:53):
learned Latin, I wanted to talk to me.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
I wanted to go see that movie, and I wanted
to see Strangers too.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
I didn't see the first one and me neither. You're
gonna skip. I saw the trailer for that too, Like
I can't skip. I gotta watch the other one first.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
You know. That's what That was my assignment to watch
the first one before we went to the movies. But
we didn't go to the movie, so I got time.
So I've never seen the first one.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
I think I have. We hope y'all had better weekends, yeah,
because our ship was uneventful.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
But I do have a date coming up next week
where I'm going I know and hopefully I won't be
sleep because I just feel tired for next week already.
Like it's a movie in the a scary movie in
the park, So that's gonna be cute outside it's is
it a big It's not like it's a it's outside,
(02:55):
but it's kind of lazy. It's a kiddie movie, kind
of it's Halloween Town.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
What if? Like, girl, you know what if? Yo? I
used to be terrified. I love scary movies. I love
scary movies so much. What is wrong with you? Though? Like?
Speaker 2 (03:13):
Why are you watching this crazy shit? Like I guess
I just want to feel scared.
Speaker 1 (03:16):
I like it too. I'm a scary movie a fiend.
I love.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
This is my season right here, Like this is my season.
I want to see all the scary movies. I only
want to see it with a man.
Speaker 1 (03:26):
So I'm like scarce. So shit actually fucking happen? Shit
really jump off? I'muld turn into somebody different carry out.
I think I might turn into what's the girl off
for the Walking day with the dreads? Oh Miche Michelle
(03:47):
bitchall turns to macheone so quick, girl. I literally was
just saying today, like I need one more pistol.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
You know, people be having all these guns, but if
you single, like it's only one person, only got two hands,
you really can't use all of the guns, right, But
I need one like the lions got, you know.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
Like the the uh. Get a three D printer.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
A little modification on it. What do they call it?
They call it a not a clapper, No.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Old bitch clapper, it's a switch.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
I don't want to switch necessarily, all right, Maybe I'll
get like a uh uh.
Speaker 1 (04:27):
I was researching online.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
Apparently the AR fifteen they have like a pistol like
AR fifteen, Like maybe.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
You could fold it up and ship fold it. It's crazy.
Get you just get you a three D printer. You
can have anything you want and go to jail. Bitch,
you can't be at the house printing guns. And this
is Charles America.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
We do what we went around here, apparently not you're
stole a nigga.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
Let's getting the sens. What were y'all going on this week?
Speaker 2 (05:02):
Y'all?
Speaker 1 (05:03):
I want to start off by giving a super big
rest in peace to a Sada Chakour. She made it
off this hell realm unscathed a little bit because she
definitely was skied at some point, but they haven't been
able to touch her since the seventies. Thank god.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
She became a citizen of Cuba never came back to
the United States. You know, there's a she has a
book that my best friend swears by, and she's been
telling me to read it for years, and now that
she's passed, it's just you know, prompted me to go
ahead and get that book and read it because that
is my birth about.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
To be sold out on the Amazon I bet order tonight.
Why you're thinking about it, right.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Because I want to read her story because she was
a black abolitionist, freedom fighter for all things black and
killed a New Jersey officer.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
She didn't kill anybody. That was all a lie. So
this is why she's you know, aside asylum in in
in Cuba, she was not guilty of anything. Actually, they
were under attack by New Jersey police. So I know
the Youngins may not know Assad of Shakur, but that's
who Tupac changed. Chose his name after you. No, she's
(06:19):
actually his step dad's sister, right, but his their last
name was not was it his last name originally? That's
not her real name either. Yeah, exactly that's the name
that Yeah, so that was her, that's the name they
took on. But it wasn't that he, you know, acquired
that name from her, like it was just family black
(06:41):
panther ship. Oh, I thought it was her that he
chose the name behind. No, So her real name is
I can't pronounce. Her last name is chess Mard. I
believe it's Chess and mar Joan chess Mard. So astat
As was wanted by the FBI and other law enforcement
agencies for her for her involvement in a nineteen seventy
three shootout that killed in New Jersey state trooper Warner Forrester.
(07:05):
She was convicted of murder and they senced her to
life in prison. Three armed men rolled up in the
women's facility and broke her out, and she resurfaced in Cuba. Cuba, Yeah,
under Fidel caused Castro.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
And she label her as a domestic terrorist.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
Most wanted since the seventies. She actually they they tried
to kill her the day that you know, they got
into the shootout with the police like they show first
to foolie show first. She was shot twice in the
back and they literally was like standing over her I
watched it like a documentary ones. They literally was just
standing over her like, is this bitch dad yet? And
(07:45):
then they took her, you know, to the hospital, and
then she actually got sentenced to life in prison. She's
been minding her business in Cuba and every president has
been going after her since the seventies. They have been
trying to get extraded her back to the United States.
The name and they weren't going for it, Nope. So
I'm glad. I'm glad.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
I heard her name was Tupac and a Tupac song.
I can't put my finger on the song right now,
but he was really uh huh, he said, saw the
she car Moon, Bougie Moon and all the really o
gz we out.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
What song was that? Y'all tell me what song was that?
He said that.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
But that's the first time I heard that name. I
was a little girl. Yep, all right, so.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
You even not a little one. Tupac went out, cut
it out, girl got murdered. Was that high school? In
middle school? When Tupac got murdered? Middle Okay? Yeah, for me,
I was welling out in middle school.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
So also over the weekend, they released a statue memorializing
the queen of rock and roll, Tina Turner.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
Herself hated at Brownsville, Tennessee.
Speaker 2 (08:58):
H y'all listen that wig that they gave Like, all right,
Tina didn't love some big hair, I'll give it to her.
But they really tried it with that piece of hair
on the That shit looked like what's that doctor suits book?
Speaker 1 (09:14):
God damn, I was so bad. If they ever want
to give me a statue, don't just put or just
why couldn't they just do like a I'm pretty sure
that the plenty of wax museums of her, but who asked,
Like when it was together, there's somebody like everybody looked
that was like that's the one.
Speaker 2 (09:30):
Like they didn't like have a conversation first, the same
Niggaho did Dwaye Wade?
Speaker 1 (09:35):
She did this one. I bet did they not consult
with her family members, her sons, Like nobody it is
ten foot tall at that, this is a big statue
and three feet a hair. Don't play with Tina like that. Yeah,
she could have. I was about to say she could
live without that. She can live it out that shit.
We could live without that shit. Okay, Tina would not
(09:56):
be happy if she were to see this big ass
the hair, Hey, guys, metal hair, the.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Same Dwayne Wade's statue. The last couple of statues came
out was fucked this one. The Wayne Waye's in that
statue of get that get out nigga, and he was
in the sucker's place on the statue. What about that
fat one in the damn New York Times statue.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Let's let statues go.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
They I feel like they're trying to pay us back
for taking down all of got that World War two
criminals right from around the country. I feel like they're
trying to pay us back. So he is resurrecting all
his bullshit. Nobody's asking for give us the money.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Right. That's that black girl at the time. Score.
Speaker 2 (10:38):
They ain't even put her in a qute outfit like
leaving McDonald's.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
Like I feel like her belly was hanging out a
little bit with her T shirt. Yeah, it was like
the real disrespectful and love with that girl her girls.
If you don't a statue can go to hell. So
that's statue got on my damn nerves, y'all. Soo young
thug is one hundred percent fulfilling his duties right because
(11:08):
under his release. Yeah, under his release, and like his
what is my brain? What's going on today?
Speaker 2 (11:16):
His his plea deal, his plea bargain. Right, there's certain things,
certain things he has to do.
Speaker 1 (11:22):
So one of them was like, you know, community service
and also like speaking to the youth and stuff like that.
So he put on a concert this weekend in front
of the Atlanta Courthouse. Okay, So Young Thug performs a
surprise concert in front of the full courthouse. Yeah, free
for his fans on Sunday. The rapper, who was previously
(11:43):
banned from Atlanta due to the terms of his probation
until condition was amended in December, announced the the surprise
show on Sunday, September twenty eight. So yeah, So he
tweeted a picture of the album cover. I'm trying to
figure out why he lights kin on the album cover?
Speaker 2 (12:00):
What was that about? That's what I was confused. I
thought that was someone just poking fun of him, but
he did that himself.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
Yeah, I don't know. Then he posted pictures of everybody
else white too. I was confused. Wonder maybe he like,
if we was white, would this happened to us?
Speaker 2 (12:16):
I don't know, had a reason with bullshit all the time.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
So I don't know why he was light skinned anyway.
You know, because when you see some shit real quick
on social media, like did I see that? You gotta
go back like who's that?
Speaker 2 (12:32):
It just made me think about Sammy Sosa ViBe's carteil.
Wasn't that Vibe Carteil? Like they're real white?
Speaker 1 (12:39):
Yes it is, so this says On the cover of Uy, Scottie,
thug brightened his skin and gave himself blue eyes and
a move that threw listeners off guard. After the project
went live, Thugger posted a carousel of photos of guest
artists who appear on the album, including a little baby, Quavo,
Sexy Red Timagine reimagined in a sandwich style, Yeah, excuse
(13:05):
me re imaged simular stop reimagined Beggar Thugger. Thugger captioned
the post my new friends the oh because he ain't
supposed to be around niggas.
Speaker 2 (13:19):
So not everybody white, that's what it is. Yeah, because
they abanded them from Atlanta. But you know Atlanta.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
When we think about Atlanta is Atlanta is literally just
a metro area, right, but you got all the other
you know, counties, areas, outside of Atlanta Metro Atlanta, so
you do not actually have to. But it's not right exactly,
So he's probably in Smyrna or I don't know, are
actually being Brookhaven, which is Buckhead essentially. So yeah, so
(13:50):
Thug hasn't given a concrete reason for the skin lightning.
The only clue comes from an Instagram post that went
live a few hours before the album's release, and it says,
if you want to be the biggest go white.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
I told you I'm good. I'm good at making reason,
making a reasonable Uh, I don't know out of bullshit?
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Again, did he not run it by nobody? Or like
was just like is this gonna hit? You know? Like
he his own man. You know another thing I saw
about him today he was doing an interview with somebody
I didn't care to go look and see. I'm sorry
who it was, who show it was, But he basically
said if mariot As scientists needed to go see a therapist,
(14:35):
he has failed as a man, because why you need
to go talk to somebody else? What? What? Literally? Bro, yeah,
you're probably sent her to a therapist, right, all of this?
Speaker 2 (14:51):
Definitely she told to somebody out side of you y'all
doing enough talking as far as I'm concerned, y'all need
to talk to other people.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
I'll talk to damn much. But that's kind of controlling,
like you don't want her seeking anybody, you know, because
I think that some people who haven't actually been to
theory meant to therapy, have a different idea about what
therapy even is.
Speaker 2 (15:13):
Like, they really don't give you no answers. It's not
like somebody's gonna tell her how to act or how
to be.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
Are to think? They try to. They try to make you,
like lead into your own resolutions.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
Yeah, So it's not like somebody's gonna say, hey, you
shouldn't be fucking with thugger.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
It's not a good man. He's been in prison, he
has several children. We gonna do that. The therapist ain't
gonna do that. Though, you are safe with this girl
going to therapy, right, it might make your relationship better
so or she might get the fuck about it here
right anyway, it's all better. Well, what are we talking today?
(15:51):
It's spooky season and we're talking about fear, not fear.
Ghosts and goblins and ghoules are they could be one
of your fears too, lions, right, But we're talking about
not being afraid. If I weren't afraid, all the things.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
I could do, So let's talk about that after this
commercial break.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
All right, y'all, we're back now. I have a question
for you. What would you do if fear didn't exist,
no limits, no judgment, just pure action. What would you do? So? See,
this is like I understand the question, but it should
(16:38):
actually read if prison didn't exist, what would you do?
Speaker 2 (16:44):
It was bitch a whole lot of shit? Okay, I'm
afraid to go to jail. I just got a shit
for real. The last year consequence I used to have.
I can tell you my number one fears, and I've
already met both. I used to always say, I'm afraid
of God and I'm afraid of ever being homeless. Those
(17:07):
were always my fears.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
And when y'all started, don't you gotta re imagine? You
gotta reimage? You can't like when you when you create
those things in your mind, like deep fears, you can
and manifest them. Right, So maybe if you like, if
(17:29):
you create the fear, create a solution for it at
the same motherfucking time. It's what I'm trying to say, right,
so those two things I have already met and conquered
in life. Essentially, you listen to everybody. Everybody.
Speaker 2 (17:41):
Level of homelessness is different. Okay, at your mama house,
it's homelessness, bitch. I'm at my mama house right now,
and I don't feel homeless.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Bitch. I felt homeless at my mama's house. I just
wear to god, I do.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
I'm ready for my own space again, like I've been
here since I broke my foot, and I'm ready be already, Like,
but I'm gonna give it till the beginning of the
year before I jump into anything else.
Speaker 1 (18:11):
Yeah, for reasons, but I get it. Homelessness is a
great I think that's a fear across the board for Americans,
and I don't think it was really Okay. I've never
been homeless. Okay, Okay, as long as my mom is breathing,
I'll never be homeless, right, But there is something freeing
right about not having to like pay to live life
(18:34):
for real. You could just go so wherever, Like I've
never lived any place for free, including my mama's house,
okay September, but I was able to pick up and
go and do what the fuck I want. I feel
like everybody should backpack in life at some point.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
This yeah, this last year, all right, So September is
the first month that I haven't paid rent, and that
shit felt good. I ain't gonna hold that shit felt nice.
I'm like, I don't owe anybody thousands of dollars.
Speaker 1 (19:00):
Before the right look at God, that shit was.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
But I also cannot smoke weed or walk around and
naked with a man, So there's that.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
So there is a trade off. Yeah, man, I just
like those were my biggest fears, and since being past
those things, I've had other fears. Right, I would say
one of one of my biggest fears that I've had
to overcome to move forward is literally just asking people
(19:37):
for help when you need it. That has always been
one of my biggest fears. Now I'm always the person
anybody can come to. I don't know it's because of
I don't know. I make it comfortable. It's just like,
I just know for a fact that people don't ask
people for shit that they think gonna say no.
Speaker 2 (19:53):
So every once in a while, shock the motherfucker a while,
be like no, you wasn't you wasn't you wasn't thinking
I was gonna.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
Say no this time. Yes, sometimes I will say no.
But I've always been the person people can come to.
But I can't think of anybody that I can go
to a lot of the times, like who ain't more
fucked up than me? And sometimes help is not always monetary,
you know what I'm saying. It's just like needing help
with a project or something like that, like finding somebody
who's gonna, I don't know, barter some services off. Just
(20:23):
asking somebody else for help has always been a big
struggle for me. I got some friends that really know
how to how to give work to other people, Like
what is the word I'm looking for? How to delegate? Really? Well,
that's me. I'm a delicate but I don't have a
problem with it.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
But I had to learn it too, because I found
myself in a hallway carrying a bunch of shit crying
somebody else's shit, crying because I was so overwhelmed with life,
like I'm over extending myself to other people so much
that I'm gonna I'm about to make myself sick. And
then after that, Babe, some shit changed, and now are
(21:04):
like when people come to me for shit, I'll help
them navigate all the other options.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
We can sit down and talk about all the other options.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
Un let's see if we've exhausted those. And if we
have exhausted all of those, then I'll help.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
Like money is the easiest thing for me to help with,
right because some people I just know, like, I'm gonna
get this money back, probably not from this person, but
I will get that money back before they would ever
see it, before they could ever pay me back. I'll
already have that money back. I just can make money
quicker than them, right. I know that about some people,
(21:41):
but my time, that's one thing I really like stend
you with nowadays because I would literally do shit for
people I don know, I feel like fucking doing now
know what's complete statement? My mom told me I was selfish,
and I'm like, you don't even really know me for real, right,
because nobody, none of my friends would say that Ashley
is selfish. Nobody would say that, right, But if you
(22:04):
want help her, cut grass girl, you selfish, Like, I'll
pay for somebody to come do it. But that is
not what I want to do with my Saturday. Sorry, right,
Like you're doing that ship for a workout, I'm gonna
go to the gym. We're air conditioning, but time. Like,
if somebody pick you up from the airport on time
or help you move like, they really love you. Like
I will do those things any airport.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
Pick if they pick you up from the airport, they
fuck with you for real heavy.
Speaker 1 (22:30):
Or take you want? Help you move, bitch. If somebody
come and help you move or pass, they really love you.
Speaker 2 (22:38):
And if someone clean your house for you, they love you.
Huh what to clean my friends houses? Really, I haven't
done it in a long time, though, I'll think about it.
But I definitely have friends where I come in and
clean their whole house for them.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
Now, I have cleaned the space i'm ana being in
someone's house. But to say I'm coming into another grown
woman's house and cleaning it. No, Now, if I come
and the bathroom is not to my liking, Like, don't
even worry about a baby, I'm cleaning. I'm cleaning the
area i'm ana being, but the whole house? Are you
a good friend? Job I have? I've definitely cleaned. I'm
talking shit, I'm like, why is this like that? Why
(23:16):
how long this spend? Like that house? Yeah, I've done it.
Hit they just do when they try to get a
guy to fall in love with them. They be over
there cooking and cleaning. The cooking and cleaning and near
your house not cleaning. That's bad. Okay, So now you
(23:37):
clean your friend's south, I will clean the nigga's house.
I'm gonna spend a lot of time over it, and I'm
just really just trying to make it comfortable for me.
It's not even for him. Still, it's not for you.
This dude I used to fuck with. If you're listening,
it was months year, a whole year in between us
(23:58):
seeing each other, And when I got to his place,
it's like nobody had touched that bathroom since I left
a year ago, because I would clean the bathroom all
the time. And when I got that, I'm like, who
is letting you fuck them with this bathroom? Like this?
Who letting you fuck them? I had let him fuck me,
(24:22):
but just one time because I was already there. But
who playing you fucking the regular? What this like? They're
not uthom when they come right that part.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
Jesus Like, if you go to a manhouse and you
feel like you gotta hover up all of his toilet
to use it, you probably shouldn't have sex on him.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
Hell don't know. And I'm pissing on your floor.
Speaker 2 (24:46):
Okay, I'm pissing all over your toilet. See, I'm just
treating your ship like you do. I'm pissing all over
this shit.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Guad station. This is sphinx bathroom. Bitch. This is no
fucking nigger of mine. Did you hear that?
Speaker 2 (25:04):
Er?
Speaker 1 (25:05):
This is no nigger of mine? That are crazy? All right?
What's one of my fears. I'm gonna share it with y'all.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
And this is hard for me to say, and it's
probably reflected in my social media. I fear look here ugly.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
I far it like.
Speaker 2 (25:26):
So I'm like, I'm so self conscious about how I
look on social media that I don't I end up
not posting nothing.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
I'll take a picture, I'd be.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
Like, that's cute, and then I'll analyze it seventeen thousand
different ways, and then I'll be like, I'm not posting that.
I would take outfit picks and I swear I'm the
baddest bitch in my outfit and feel like the baddest
bitch out in my outfit, and then I look at
myself in the picture and I'll be like, yours.
Speaker 1 (25:48):
Not you, girl, it's the fucking iPhone camera. I already
told you that shit. They fucking with our perception, so
we use these stupid ass filters. I know I look
bad in person than I do on the Internet.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
Yes, Internet, I'm too much finer than the Internet. And
then when I think videos. All right, so, y'all, I
got a nice smile, but these two bottom teeth, they
like the wisdoms tooth start growing in and they started shifting.
Speaker 1 (26:13):
And I feel like, curry b I'll be wearing low shirts.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
So you don't look at my bottom teeth because they cricketies.
Speaker 1 (26:21):
There, cut it out.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
They still looking at your face, girl, the face. They
looking at your smile, and don't nobody see them fucking teeth. Okay, no, no,
we we stole hard on that stuff.
Speaker 1 (26:33):
No I can. I can say I have sort of
the same fear. Right. First of all, I don't like
people my fucking life for real. But recently I saw
this girl's Instagram and she was big, honey, pretty face, okay,
big pretty, but stomach out Kuchie cut is on. She
in the drive through, in the driveway in her house.
She's like, fuck y'all, bitches, y'all just mad. Then I
(26:56):
don't give a funk.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
Y'all mad because I can get on here, look like
I'm looking and not give a damn. Had hell of
followers and people like authenticity, right, So of course if
we could just wake up and get on live, shit
would be lit.
Speaker 1 (27:13):
And not give a fuck. That's why I aspired to
you for I don't want to.
Speaker 2 (27:18):
I do I want to, I want to not. I
want to get online. I want to get on my
I g lap and not give a single solitary fuck.
Speaker 1 (27:25):
I want that, but I can't. It's so difficult. What's
unpack that a little bit? Because I feel like I
just you know how people be talking shit about women
wearing hair and make up all the shit, Like, bitch,
I'm gonna look like I'm going to a wedding every
fucking day, the same shit y'all natural bitches do y'all
when y'all gotta go to a wedding, y'all go, get
y'all a bus down, y'all, putash on top of y'all, dredge, y'all,
(27:49):
putsh on top of y'all, uh low cuts, Like I
want to look like that every day? What's wrong with that?
What's wrong with that? Nothing? I want to I want
to present my best every day, and I feel like
even like in relationships, like I remember my ex telling
me basically basically like not to wear my wigs. He
just want me to be comfortable. I'm comfortable like this.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
I'm not gonna be comfortable walking around with this shit,
this untreated ass fucking here.
Speaker 1 (28:17):
Okay, this shit as little as a motherfucker. I mean
it's stretches, but as little as I'm not comfortable. Yes,
I'm not gonna be comfortable like that. So what you
really think you're gonna do is like you think you
can take my swag. That's the cutting of the wig,
right he thought he was like taking my swag, No, bitch, like,
(28:38):
I'm still mean with without the fucking wig. I just
feel better when I look like I'm going to a
fucking wedding. And why would you not want your bitch
to feel good about yourself right at all times?
Speaker 2 (28:50):
But I think they want us to feel good about ourselves.
And it's full authenticity without weave, without lashes, without makeup, without.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
If all black women started pulling up just like that,
these niggas would definitely be leaving the community and droves
even more than they are now. That ain't with y'all.
Don't want y'all mama. It's your mama up under this wig. Nigga.
You don't want your mama. You want a bad bitch.
And all my ninge on my hinge.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
I like, I was courageous, right, And I was like,
I need these niggas to see me how.
Speaker 1 (29:27):
I am right?
Speaker 2 (29:29):
So I put one picture of myself of me in
a robe. It was you couldn't see all the robe, right,
but it was no, it was like you all these dates, bitch.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
It was my top, just the top, not even but
you could see the top of my rope.
Speaker 2 (29:43):
And I have on a bonnet and it's okay, And
like my edges is nappy and gray coming out in
front of the bonnet.
Speaker 1 (29:52):
And when I tell you, the niggas is on that picture, No,
nigga's definitely like an ugly bitch, okay. And I'm saying ugly,
Like how weed are feeling ugly? No?
Speaker 2 (30:00):
How you don't like when you know when you look
not looking the best and niggas be on you like
target so much. Picture, Yeah, and I'm surprised, like that
surprised me because I'm like, damn, that is just me,
like literally, in my mind, the most basic looking version
of myself, and it's all kinds of fishures in me
and workout gear and like looking you know, the dresses
(30:24):
on there and the one with me just in a
bonnet is like getting all the love.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
I'm like, oh shit, well.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
Maybe it ain't that bad out here when you got
like a mama and that one probably you just look
like you ready to be a wife.
Speaker 1 (30:36):
Wife. I feel like, why should not be walking around
all day with bond ands on? Okay?
Speaker 2 (30:41):
Men like you gotta feel, yes, you gotta bitch. If
you don't make it a fantasy for your nigga, he
can go look for one so and make sure make
sure you remain a fantasy. Men should na see all
the things? Why this nigga this weekend? He was like,
he was like, I almost.
Speaker 1 (30:57):
Saw your hair today, bitch.
Speaker 2 (30:59):
When I tell you I took that bonnet off and
put my hat weg on so quick, I mean you
missed it. And I was like, you wouldn't have seen
it anyway because I got a stocking cap or talking.
Speaker 1 (31:09):
You don't let them see your hair, not if it's
not first first of all. Like, right now, what I've
been doing is just slicking my shit back in the
point you tell it. I should not even like braided.
It's just like real rough right now. I am looking
for like somebody who specialized not your hairshit is cool,
but you do have to take care of your hair.
You do have to get treatments and stuff like that,
(31:31):
and I just haven't been. I haven't been taking care
of my hair. So I'm looking for somebody that I
can start a regimen with and take care of my
actual hair. But right now, it's no shape. It's just
bit you you know, you know what time it is,
so you sleep in your wing or you take it
off and just put on the hell no about it.
(31:51):
Oh no, that is miserable. No, I'm past that part, Lie.
Especially if we listen to list when I was like
just wags off.
Speaker 2 (31:59):
We would have man for the first time. And I
have them I'm wearing a wig. I let them know,
like when I come out the bathroom, my wig is
gonna stay in there, and I'm gonna put on a
bonnet or I might not. I want you to treat
my bonnet like a crown. Okay, that's what it is.
And don't be alarmed by the hair hanging up in there.
(32:22):
It's the long you're gonna be on my fucking head
because I cannot sleep like that. Yeah, but I don't
want to have sex without my hair though, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:30):
Bitch, because who ain't in there like a porn star
like flipping that shit. And don't pull it too hard,
but pull it. Yeah, we will barrow this pussy in
his hair, thank you.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
But I remember my last boyfriend. He used to do
it on purpose. He used to piss me off, like
when we were having sex, like dogy style, he'd take
my wig off and put it on his head. Stop
gay back my fucking hair ruining it for me?
Speaker 1 (32:56):
Let me find out you be wearing my shit when
I'm home. Look cute on you though, Stop, I remember
somebody's pulling my hair so hard, Like Okay, I'll glue
my wigs down sometimes and sometimes I don't, and I
have my shit blue down and nigga yanked me. Are
are you well?
Speaker 2 (33:14):
I don't know, wags, you're a bitch at the house
where But why are you pulling my hair hard like that?
Speaker 1 (33:19):
Like it's attached to my scalp? So like days where
I actually blew my shit down. Of course, I might
have to wear it to bed, like I wore my
hair to bed last night because I had shit to
do today. But on a regular day, no, I'm taking
that shit off. Have you ever remember I do having
a bonnet? Have you ever missed an opportunity because of
fear or delayed the goal or you know what? I
(33:43):
as an adult, I feel like I you know, I,
I definitely don't execute on all opportunities. And it's not
out of fear, though, it's out of fucking procrastination and laziness.
That's what I'm fighting more than fear every fucking day.
But I can remember as a child, and I recently
I was saying as how adults are really just dream killers.
You know what I'm saying. I remember like things I
(34:04):
wanted to do as a kid, and I was talked
out of doing it because of somebody else's fear. It
was never my fear, bitch. I've been a big personality.
So that's why if you don't have a parent to
cultivate that, you know, because of their fears not sharing
all your goals. Yeah, now you grow up, Yeah, that.
Speaker 2 (34:23):
People will unlock a new fear for you that you
didn't even have just by you sharing your dreams with them. Right, Okay,
new fear a lot.
Speaker 1 (34:32):
Right. I was talking to my homegirl today because she's
a whole fucking psychologist. Bitch. If you listening, sometimes I
have to be like, hey, because this bitch want map out.
She will map out her whole entire life. Like I'm
not like, I'm kind of like, go with the flow, bitch,
you figure it out. We got some time, She got
a whole I'm like, listen, I don't have all the
answers right now that you're asking me, like you're trying
(34:54):
to force me to map out the next nine fucking
ten months while I'm driving on the highway. I don't
got it. Don't ask me. Shit, I don't know what's
gonna happen, but it'll be figured out when it needs
to be. I have some procrastinations, my problem.
Speaker 2 (35:15):
I have some fears that I'm gonna share that are
gonna go. It's a little deeper, y'all, but we family
all here, and I'm gonna tell y'all my truth. This
is what this space is for. I fear.
Speaker 1 (35:27):
I'm afraid to be a mother, and I'm afraid not
to be a mother. Mm. Interesting, I'm not afraid to
like raise a child.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
I'm afraid of trying to have a child, like actually
the physical part of just because of my experience with
it before.
Speaker 1 (35:46):
That scares me.
Speaker 2 (35:47):
Then I'm afraid of picking a bad partner. M That
scares the shit out of me. But then I'm also
scared that what if I I'm like, I'm getting older,
what if I never become a mom? So those are
real life fears for me. What if you get a
serial killer? I mean you just never fucking know what She's.
Speaker 1 (36:09):
Yeah, you're just gonna have to go with with God.
Speaker 2 (36:15):
Because I mean, like when we're thinking about the simple oldfairs,
like shit could get worse.
Speaker 1 (36:19):
That's why, Like it'd be like the little things that
harass me. It's not ever like the big things. I
don't think. Okay, I've been past the fear of not
having children because I've had two tuber pregnancies years ago. Right,
I'm forty one now, and it's like that's just the reality.
I'm gonna get this bag though. I got two nieces
(36:40):
and a nephew, and I want to see them very,
very happy. Right, So if that's the way I gotta go.
I gotta go that route. I don't think it's Also,
it's not selfish for like say Frans is either one
or like I don't want to kids, this's over with.
I don't even fuck it. It's not selfish. It's not selfish
to not want to be responsible for somebody else for
the rest of your life, like your fucking life changes.
(37:02):
And without having had a kid yet, like I'm a
mother at heart, I'm a mom, like, so it.
Speaker 2 (37:08):
Doesn't scare me to actually have to have a kid.
And and but they don't stay little. You know, you're
gonna add with a teenager.
Speaker 1 (37:17):
I've always wanted a seven year old though, so I
can stay. My mama said, like, that's all I want.
My little girl will be saying, Well, my mama said, it's.
Speaker 2 (37:27):
Not the raising the kid that it's the physical part
of trying to push a kid into the world.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
I can't wait.
Speaker 2 (37:33):
That's security because I just my experience with it was
just not a healthy one, you know.
Speaker 1 (37:38):
So yeah, I can't wait. And I'm gonna do it
in the house in the pool. You're a bad bitch,
epidual me right now. Give me all Martyn medicine and drugs,
and you know, because I've had a tuer pregnancy and
I've actually been cut before, like the doctors will now
be inclined to like try to make me do like
a C section if I were to have a kid,
(37:59):
like I want to push not having no sea section
unless than my fucking stepping out this coochie feet first
like I did my mama. Okay, then I'll do a
sea section if they like breached or something like that.
You're not about to do a sea section around your
schedule because you got vacation is to I don't know
Italy next month, and that's what they be doing, scheduling
(38:19):
your child's birth around in their life, right the other
way around. Yeah, what else? I fear picking the wrong partner.
Speaker 2 (38:29):
I don't pick nobody, and then you just gotta pick
him in it. If it's not right, you just do
it again.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
I just can't pick. I just struggle with picking.
Speaker 2 (38:40):
So I'm always like dating people who are I'm always
entertaining people who I don't see future with. Like I'll
be like, oh, he's so young, this is fun. We'll
do that, but he's too young to be serious about
or he's cool, he's.
Speaker 1 (38:56):
Not talking keep talking so you can hear you bullshit.
Keep talking.
Speaker 2 (38:59):
I'm going I'm being honest right now, I'm being right. Yeah,
But I like my shit, you know my shit. My
fear is when it comes to relationships. I just I've
never been in a relationship where I wasn't forced. You
don't that, so I have to here with relationships. But
then I'm also afraid to get alone by myself. Yeah,
(39:23):
it's just so stupid, and it's so contradictory and so dumb.
Speaker 1 (39:27):
I just fear of picking the wrong partner. So I mean,
I guess I'm past that because I did that shit
a lot. Why not at another you know what I'm saying.
That's really how I be feeling. Boy Like, I love
love like. I'm never afraid to do it again. I
am never I will love like I've never been hurt before,
and I'm gonna keep doing it. I don't give a
fuck if I'm one hundred bitch, if I'm unhappy in
(39:49):
this marriage, I'm getting a fuck up out of there. Recently,
one hundred year old man or ninety something year old
man divorced his He's ninety six or something. His wife
is like ninety two and he divorced her because he.
Speaker 2 (40:00):
Found out that she cheated thirty or sixty years in
the fucking past.
Speaker 1 (40:07):
That'll be me. I'm not happy here. I'm one hundred
cave or walk cootie dry.
Speaker 2 (40:12):
I'm out of there. Yeah, I'm gonna start again, and
I think I can get me another nigga.
Speaker 1 (40:16):
Like I've been past that fear of standing in situations.
I don't even get you fucking long. I'm so scared.
I don't even get in this situation.
Speaker 2 (40:24):
Like if something about stay that, I won't even go
in that motherfucker try one.
Speaker 1 (40:30):
Just just pick go on and see what happens.
Speaker 2 (40:32):
I'm like, all right, So the movie guy, mm hm
sentia there, Okay, he yeah, there's potential there, so we'll see.
And I just watched that Boaz and Roof and y'all,
y'all need to watch that. I cried so hard watching
that movie because I was like, yeah, I want to
be in I'm like that it was so beautiful and
that man, it's so fine.
Speaker 1 (40:54):
And what's her name? I don't even know the movie.
You mentioned it to me today and I hadn't even It's.
Speaker 2 (41:02):
Like soyah soriah her she's so beautiful and Tyre.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
Lepley is just a god. He's in there and he
plays bowl ass.
Speaker 2 (41:14):
And I'm like, oh, yes, yes, send me that guy,
And that would just make you want to pray and
just be very you know, sincere about what you want
from a partner and who you want to be as
a partner. You know who you want to show up as,
so you know that.
Speaker 1 (41:33):
You got to be what you want. Right. So we
be having all these demands as women and you suck
run and run into somebody right that you wrote down.
If you want all these things out of them and
you're not ready as a woman for that type of man,
you gotta make sure you're ready for that type of man. Also, yep,
because that type of nigga comes like, ah, this bit stupid,
(41:53):
Like but don't know what you want, don't I don't
know what You gotta be sure you be decisive. You
know that part? Yeah, man. So that's something that's my fears.
That's like and.
Speaker 2 (42:07):
Another one that I'm really gonna share with y'all. I'll
be scared of like getting sick or being really sick.
That's a fear, like I'm sure everybody's scared to get
sick and be really sick and be. I don't want
to be It's the word I'm looking for.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
Burden. Yes, you took it right over my tongue. I
don't want to be a burden. Mm hmm. That's a
fear of mine. So I don't want to be alive
and sick. I'm not afraid to die, and I feel
like once you conquered the fair of death, you can
do anything on this planet. Okay, I'm more afraid of
prison than death. So it's my time to get the
(42:50):
fuck up out of here. I'm out of here. But
I do not want that's a fear of mine, to
be alive and sick, not to be sick, because I
feel like my body's gonna always fight me to have to, like, yes,
be a burden heard at somebody else, especially having children
and stuff like that, you know, like you know, just
I look at my parents. My my mama is in
(43:11):
pretty good health for her age, though she doesn't think
she is. She's in really good health. My stepdad not
so much, my daddy not so much, and my daddy
wife like shit, she's our age. Okay, I'm so grateful
that she exists because she could take care of him,
I wouldn't have to, but I think, uh, I wouldn't
(43:36):
want my kids to have to take care of me.
Speaker 2 (43:38):
Yeah, I don't want nobody. I don't want anybody to
slow anybody's life down because they taking care of me.
Speaker 1 (43:45):
That's a fear, you know. Yeah, that's a real fear. Mm.
Speaker 2 (43:50):
But nonetheless, I just be out here living like I'm fearless. Though,
But what else do you do?
Speaker 1 (43:57):
You know?
Speaker 2 (43:58):
But when it comes to that social media shit, y'all,
I just gotta lock it again because I know I
like both of us, we should both have at least
one hundred thousand followers by now.
Speaker 1 (44:11):
We should. We just want the money though. I'm gonna
tell y'all, I'm gonna be honest with y'all. Be honest,
be honest, fucking honest. I want to have enough money
so motherfuckers can't see me. I don't want like that
is not like this, And I know that's where we're
(44:31):
headed at with like AI and you know, getting rid
of actual jobs, Like you're going to literally be a
job now, right, so you're gonna have to figure out
a way to sell yourself to make money. That is
where we are with the social media, and not the
way you used to do it, like right used to shit, bitch,
I just tell them a loved one girl.
Speaker 2 (44:53):
Get each white of them niggas you fucking on to
give you a hundred dollars at least?
Speaker 1 (44:57):
That ain't even no money. I challenge that, bitch. I
love you girl, I challenged her. I said, listen, dollars,
there ain't no fucking money. Remember one year they had
a winter cold challenge. They have bitches hitting up the
nigga ain't fucking asking for on winter. Niggas was really
curving bitches by the winter cold. And you are in
(45:17):
the winter. A lot of y'all bitches fear asking niggas
for money. And that's where y'all got me fucked up
at now. I'm not I don't really ask men for money,
But I'm not fucking with somebody I know wouldn't give
me money if I need it. Okay, that's a difference.
I'm not fucking with. I'm not fucking with somebody who
can't at least take care of themselves, and I'm not
fucking with somebody who doesn't have the means if I
(45:39):
happen to need something, because I don't have a fear
of asking. I just don't because I feel like you
should just do because yeah, but they're gonna ask us
for anything they want without fear, without record, so I
don't have. You're gonna put like a little weird laugh
behind its. Yeah, and I'm mouth and your ears and
(46:01):
your fucking knows if they wanted you want to ask
for it. So stop having fear of the energy your youth.
Speaker 2 (46:09):
Yeah, okay, they were, so I don't have no fear
of asking, and I'll be real.
Speaker 1 (46:18):
How you doing? Tell me just how to ask for money? Tim, Hey, baby,
how are your day? And that's good? That's good. M
Did you had fun last night? I had such a
good time. Yeah. I want to ask you something. Remember
(46:39):
I told you about that thing I needed. I really
really would appreciate it if you could help me with that. Now.
Speaker 2 (46:47):
If you can't, it's fine, but if you could, it
would make me really really happy.
Speaker 1 (46:53):
Okay, thank you, I really appreciate me. And listen, don't
text people asking them money. You call them. You verbally
call And as I don't like somebody texting me about money,
I need you to call me and ask me verbally
for my damn money. I'm not gonna ask you what for.
I have no extra questions. If I can do it,
I'm gonna do it. If I can, I can't. If
(47:14):
you need some money from that man, you gotta get
him at face to face, all over the phone, FaceTime
or something. He gonna have to tell you no to
your face, girl, and I will always gonna be hard.
I didn't really mention what I want before I ask
him for it too. Mm hm, Like what like, I
don't know, Like something you saw that you want to
(47:35):
want to buy? It's this class I want to take.
Speaker 2 (47:39):
I like, yeah, it's this class, and I think it
would really help me with what I'm trying to do.
Speaker 1 (47:44):
Blah blah blah. But it's five thousand dollars. Man, it
is crazy. Yeah, it's crazy. But if you do, if
you know ten niggas, you do that to each one
of them, you could at least you could fundraise amongst
your contacts in your cell phone, crowd sharing with your niggas.
It's fundraising. Go fund me, yeah, fund me. But I
(48:10):
ain't like people have the time for that many people
I'm talking, I feel like, I don't know why. I
just feel like most of the people who listen to
the podcast, are like younger, yeah, so, and I know
they are afraid to ask h men for money. It
was a time I might have been afraid, but then
you realize that, like Damn said, they don't give a
(48:32):
god damn, they are asking you for whatever it is
they want. Hold chest out and yeah, and then guess
what if he say no, you could just lock the list.
Now you got to deal with him. I definitely ask
niggas for money when I get want to get rid
of it. I won't leave a nigga. I won't leave
a nigga alone.
Speaker 2 (48:50):
If he say no for a good reason, if he
has a good reason why he can't, well, if he
don't just don't want to, then you got.
Speaker 1 (49:00):
I remember one time I asked this dude I used
to fuck with. I was in college at the time,
but you know Meastionnari and Vonder living in an apartment together,
and I asked him for the pet fee, if he
would pay my pet fee for my dog and he
told me no. He was like, dang, some shit, I
want to spend money on. No, this is very important
(49:24):
to me. It's my dog. I just stopped talking to him.
And this is somebody I haven't talking to for years, Like, no,
what do you mean? I'm confused And it ain't even
that much. Yes, I'm asking you for like three hundred
and fifty dollars.
Speaker 2 (49:38):
Okay, hold out in college, that was a lot. This
was a grown man. This is not a college student.
Oh okay, this is somebody's father. Oh okay, daddy.
Speaker 1 (49:49):
If you don't pay for this, yeah yeah, pay for this.
Like what do you I mean? Yeah, that's the quickest way.
And I mean if you don't like a guy anymore,
that is also, like I said, the quickest way to
get rid of him, ask him from some outlandish amount
of money like ten grand or something like that. Man,
that nigga ain't never calling you again. You're he might
call you in a year, lady, like like, hopefully you
(50:10):
forgot about Yeah you forgot that. I ask for it again,
stilling it. I still need that land and getting the
handlob like stitched up the heavy earrings weird. And that's
only like three hundred five hundred dollars. You could get
that done quick. I need the whole blue ear nigga
ten thousand, because I said no, I can't hear no
(50:32):
what Shay. I'm trying to think if I have any
other like super fear. I used to be afraid of
the dark. I used to be afraid to sleep on
my back. I have conquered all those things. Like I said,
I was afraid of the dark, and I was afraid
to sleep on my back because I was afraid of
death and laying on my back felt like a coffin.
But now I intentionally sleep on my back because it's
good for your health and it's good to make sure
(50:54):
your body is aligned as much as possible in the
soft ass fucking mattresses, on soft mattresses. I'd be too,
I'll be like I would prefer that, not yet though,
Like that's how.
Speaker 2 (51:06):
I want it at ninety eight, not not in nineteen
ninety eight, you know, at ninety.
Speaker 1 (51:12):
Eight, so on nine to twenty eight exactly, see you.
Speaker 2 (51:17):
No, I don't want that. I just want I don't
want to die in my sleep yet. That's a fear
that's been a fear.
Speaker 1 (51:22):
Of mine, dying young. Like you know, I don't yeah
all of that. Yeah, I'm still trying to figure out
what happened with my homegirl. And it's just like her
mom just says she was. She came home and she
was in the recliner. And you know, one thing that
makes me so sad about that is that she didn't
(51:44):
have like a peace of mind before leaving the planet.
Like she was struggling and she was trying to get
out of her mom's house. You know what I'm saying, Like,
depression can really set in when you end up back
in the place you're raised in, Okay, so you really
got to go in with a plan to get the
fuck up on out of there. And she just it
just you know, she was just piling up. It was
(52:05):
just piling up. I just knew. I almost feel like
she just let go, you know what I'm saying, Like,
I just feel like she just was like, let me
get the fuck up out of here. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (52:15):
And it's but I mean I try. I'm like, at
this stage of my life, I'm trying to It's the
fear of the unknown, right because we know, we know
that we gotta die, all of us, right, But it's
just not knowing what's next. And so I just tried
to always visualize that what's next is better than what's now.
(52:38):
And it's hard because you just don't know. You all
these stories about heaven and hell and the places you
can go. And you know, I mean, nobody wants to
go and burn.
Speaker 1 (52:51):
You remember when Tie passed, how you went to school
with us, went to Benedict, finally got murdered. Yes, So
the week before Ty passed, one week to the day
that he passed, he had posted a picture of him.
I forgot the guy who was in the picture with him,
somebody from Benedict too, but he posted a picture he
and it said live because we did a lot longer.
(53:12):
And I commented and I said, do we really know that?
And he commented back, was like I think we do.
One week later he was out of here and I
went back and I commented. I was like, you know,
rest in peace to whatever one of us now gets
to experience the unknown, because I don't think this is it.
And that's why like this, like this is not this
(53:33):
the way this world that we live in is set
up where children are abused, murdered, kidnapped. It's just a
hell realm. It's nothing good about this place, you know
what I'm saying, Like evil prevails around it Like no,
I don't know if not, Like I just it's listen,
a new Earth is coming right, So things are starting
(53:53):
to be unveiled. But it takes it takes a lot
of people to be aware of the evil that actually exists,
because people don't think that these things are actually happening
in this world. No, I know they they don't think
it's a three four hundred thousand black women missing in
America annually, teenage girls like this ship is fucking happening.
This is not a good place, so there has to
(54:16):
be a better place than this. I ain't coming back.
I just I'm lif fath number nine bitches over with
for me. I just hope that there's coffee at the
next place. You're a vampire. You love coffee. Vampires drink
coffee so they don't eat drink blood. They don't have
to urge to drink blood. Get you, some macha, bitch.
(54:38):
Not you hope there's coffee. A different type of meat.
You said, some proper ship, and then I was like,
ohe they got coffee a chickenweed. You know you want
a different meat. You want to what I want?
Speaker 2 (54:52):
Some shit tie down the same old meat.
Speaker 1 (54:58):
They just break some blue meat. That be great, though,
like a new meat that takes meat you ever had before.
I eat this veggie meat from the factory and Rowley
chickpea burger. It is so good. Remember those little nuggets
from Whole Foods. Somebody used to get those, order them? Yeah,
I ordered those, that's veggie. I ordered those directly from
(55:19):
the factory. Now, like that is a good protein. What
the fuck was that you had to these little nicely
seasoned cardboard done? Yet this she used to be busting
your last busting her last laugh About fear, Ah, nothing
fear is fear but fear itself. Nothing fierce fear but fears.
(55:43):
He like, don't fear, listen, just do everything trembling and
fear and and fear. Just still do it, though, push
through because once you push through that fair the other
side is so fucking miraculous, amazing eggs. So one another.
Fair is public speaking? Right? And I have actually done
(56:05):
a couple, yes, And isn't that weird? I have done
not like not like public speaking while I'm just getting
up there talking shit. I mean like in a professional setting,
public speaking type thing, right where I have to really
uh articulate for the niggas in the room, Like, I mean,
(56:25):
one thing, you just gotta know what the fuck it
is that you're talking about. You're talking about. Yeah, I've
done toast masters several times, and I have not kicked
the fear of public speaking. I haven't. I start sweating,
Like once I get up there and start talking, I'm cool,
but I'm gonna stutter. I'm gonna farnt. I'm gonna sweat
(56:46):
far up there. Far. You really got to imagine to
hope the mic ain't like these condense ther mics. Okay,
I hope you don't pick up everything, because yes, I'm
a farnt too, and I'm gonna be sweat. But do it,
my still't do it? Yeah? Do it?
Speaker 2 (56:59):
Fear a disease, you guys, don't let it into your
spirit the best you can. And if you encourages not
being without fear, courage is doing it in that spite
of fear.
Speaker 1 (57:12):
Exactly, be courageous in all things. I challenge you all, listening.
Speaker 2 (57:17):
To the sound of our voices, to pick one thing
that brings you fear in your life right now, and
I want you to attack that fear with all the
ferocity you have in your body. Just one thing this
week that makes you afraid, that makes you scared. I
want you to attack that thing even.
Speaker 1 (57:37):
If it's that nigga, don't be putting his hands on you.
Pull me over there. We could double team him together.
Whoever it is.
Speaker 2 (57:45):
Fear him, attack that thing, y'all, because there's somebody listening
getting the ass beat.
Speaker 1 (57:51):
It's just inevitable. Oh yeah, that's at least abody. Yeah,
call me. I'll pistol whoop your nigga for you. I
promise you will, because on that one, I'm not fighting.
I'm patting like once I broke my foot.
Speaker 2 (58:06):
The all the fight that I had in me left
that for three him your friend that will call the
police for you, I doubt fast shame.
Speaker 1 (58:16):
All right, y'all, you enjoy this episode, y'all. Tune in
every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app wherever the fuck you
get your podcasts at. This is your co hosts a
j Holiday two point zero on Instagram's kick of Tam.
Speaker 2 (58:28):
Y'all, It's official Tambama on Instagram. Also, we have We
Talk About podcasts, y'all. Follow us there, y'all. Remember speak
now and neighverhold your fears, fuck fear, fucked them fears,
period deuces.
Speaker 1 (58:41):
We Talk Back podcast is a production of iHeart Radio.
Visit the iHeartRadio, app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen
to your favorite shows.
Welcome to We Talk Back Podcast, the production of iHeartRadio
and the Black Effect Network.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion who talks.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
What's up y'all? Is your girl? AJ? Holiday? What's up? DAYA?
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Damn?
Speaker 1 (00:20):
Hey, y'all? I love y'all so very much. How you doing, AJ?
I'm doing. I'm doing fine. How was your weekend? Girl?
Was supposed to storm and all the stuff. So I've
been waiting for rain all fucking weekend. It didn't happen.
I know storms they were threatened using about, but shit uneventful.
(00:44):
Yeah it did rain. It did rain for us.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
We did get some weather, but it wasn't like what
I was hoping for. I was hoping to be like
rain ding and watching scary movies.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
God, have you seen that movie Him yet? No?
Speaker 2 (00:59):
I wanted to go see it just came out. I
heard it was like really mynic Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
So I saw when I saw the trailer on Instagram,
I commented and I said, you gotta know what you're
looking at when you see it, and like all these
people was commenting, like some people was like on calling
me just from that small line, like I'm a super
conspiracy theorist. From the trailer, I could see hell of shit,
(01:29):
like I know what that movie is about without watching
a movie, and it's real shit. People think they can't
be touched by stuff just because they don't believe in it.
That is not true. I do feel like they be
putting bullshit in these movies, Like I turn shit off
and I hear too much chanting and Latin and shit
like that. I fast forward because what the fuck are
y'all and what you're saying? Yeah? Yeah, And until I
(01:53):
learned Latin, I wanted to talk to me.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
I wanted to go see that movie, and I wanted
to see Strangers too.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
I didn't see the first one and me neither. You're
gonna skip. I saw the trailer for that too, Like
I can't skip. I gotta watch the other one first.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
You know. That's what That was my assignment to watch
the first one before we went to the movies. But
we didn't go to the movie, so I got time.
So I've never seen the first one.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
I think I have. We hope y'all had better weekends, yeah,
because our ship was uneventful.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
But I do have a date coming up next week
where I'm going I know and hopefully I won't be
sleep because I just feel tired for next week already.
Like it's a movie in the a scary movie in
the park, So that's gonna be cute outside it's is
it a big It's not like it's a it's outside,
(02:55):
but it's kind of lazy. It's a kiddie movie, kind
of it's Halloween Town.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
What if? Like, girl, you know what if? Yo? I
used to be terrified. I love scary movies. I love
scary movies so much. What is wrong with you? Though? Like?
Speaker 2 (03:13):
Why are you watching this crazy shit? Like I guess
I just want to feel scared.
Speaker 1 (03:16):
I like it too. I'm a scary movie a fiend.
I love.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
This is my season right here, Like this is my season.
I want to see all the scary movies. I only
want to see it with a man.
Speaker 1 (03:26):
So I'm like scarce. So shit actually fucking happen? Shit
really jump off? I'muld turn into somebody different carry out.
I think I might turn into what's the girl off
for the Walking day with the dreads? Oh Miche Michelle
(03:47):
bitchall turns to macheone so quick, girl. I literally was
just saying today, like I need one more pistol.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
You know, people be having all these guns, but if
you single, like it's only one person, only got two hands,
you really can't use all of the guns, right, But
I need one like the lions got, you know.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
Like the the uh. Get a three D printer.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
A little modification on it. What do they call it?
They call it a not a clapper, No.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Old bitch clapper, it's a switch.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
I don't want to switch necessarily, all right, Maybe I'll
get like a uh uh.
Speaker 1 (04:27):
I was researching online.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
Apparently the AR fifteen they have like a pistol like
AR fifteen, Like maybe.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
You could fold it up and ship fold it. It's crazy.
Get you just get you a three D printer. You
can have anything you want and go to jail. Bitch,
you can't be at the house printing guns. And this
is Charles America.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
We do what we went around here, apparently not you're
stole a nigga.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
Let's getting the sens. What were y'all going on this week?
Speaker 2 (05:02):
Y'all?
Speaker 1 (05:03):
I want to start off by giving a super big
rest in peace to a Sada Chakour. She made it
off this hell realm unscathed a little bit because she
definitely was skied at some point, but they haven't been
able to touch her since the seventies. Thank god.
Speaker 2 (05:22):
She became a citizen of Cuba never came back to
the United States. You know, there's a she has a
book that my best friend swears by, and she's been
telling me to read it for years, and now that
she's passed, it's just you know, prompted me to go
ahead and get that book and read it because that
is my birth about.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
To be sold out on the Amazon I bet order tonight.
Why you're thinking about it, right.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Because I want to read her story because she was
a black abolitionist, freedom fighter for all things black and
killed a New Jersey officer.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
She didn't kill anybody. That was all a lie. So
this is why she's you know, aside asylum in in
in Cuba, she was not guilty of anything. Actually, they
were under attack by New Jersey police. So I know
the Youngins may not know Assad of Shakur, but that's
who Tupac changed. Chose his name after you. No, she's
(06:19):
actually his step dad's sister, right, but his their last
name was not was it his last name originally? That's
not her real name either. Yeah, exactly that's the name
that Yeah, so that was her, that's the name they
took on. But it wasn't that he, you know, acquired
that name from her, like it was just family black
(06:41):
panther ship. Oh, I thought it was her that he
chose the name behind. No, So her real name is
I can't pronounce. Her last name is chess Mard. I
believe it's Chess and mar Joan chess Mard. So astat
As was wanted by the FBI and other law enforcement
agencies for her for her involvement in a nineteen seventy
three shootout that killed in New Jersey state trooper Warner Forrester.
(07:05):
She was convicted of murder and they senced her to
life in prison. Three armed men rolled up in the
women's facility and broke her out, and she resurfaced in Cuba. Cuba, Yeah,
under Fidel caused Castro.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
And she label her as a domestic terrorist.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
Most wanted since the seventies. She actually they they tried
to kill her the day that you know, they got
into the shootout with the police like they show first
to foolie show first. She was shot twice in the
back and they literally was like standing over her I
watched it like a documentary ones. They literally was just
standing over her like, is this bitch dad yet? And
(07:45):
then they took her, you know, to the hospital, and
then she actually got sentenced to life in prison. She's
been minding her business in Cuba and every president has
been going after her since the seventies. They have been
trying to get extraded her back to the United States.
The name and they weren't going for it, Nope. So
I'm glad. I'm glad.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
I heard her name was Tupac and a Tupac song.
I can't put my finger on the song right now,
but he was really uh huh, he said, saw the
she car Moon, Bougie Moon and all the really o
gz we out.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
What song was that? Y'all tell me what song was that?
He said that.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
But that's the first time I heard that name. I
was a little girl. Yep, all right, so.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
You even not a little one. Tupac went out, cut
it out, girl got murdered. Was that high school? In
middle school? When Tupac got murdered? Middle Okay? Yeah, for me,
I was welling out in middle school.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
So also over the weekend, they released a statue memorializing
the queen of rock and roll, Tina Turner.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
Herself hated at Brownsville, Tennessee.
Speaker 2 (08:58):
H y'all listen that wig that they gave Like, all right,
Tina didn't love some big hair, I'll give it to her.
But they really tried it with that piece of hair
on the That shit looked like what's that doctor suits book?
Speaker 1 (09:14):
God damn, I was so bad. If they ever want
to give me a statue, don't just put or just
why couldn't they just do like a I'm pretty sure
that the plenty of wax museums of her, but who asked,
Like when it was together, there's somebody like everybody looked
that was like that's the one.
Speaker 2 (09:30):
Like they didn't like have a conversation first, the same
Niggaho did Dwaye Wade?
Speaker 1 (09:35):
She did this one. I bet did they not consult
with her family members, her sons, Like nobody it is
ten foot tall at that, this is a big statue
and three feet a hair. Don't play with Tina like that. Yeah,
she could have. I was about to say she could
live without that. She can live it out that shit.
We could live without that shit. Okay, Tina would not
(09:56):
be happy if she were to see this big ass
the hair, Hey, guys, metal hair, the.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Same Dwayne Wade's statue. The last couple of statues came
out was fucked this one. The Wayne Waye's in that
statue of get that get out nigga, and he was
in the sucker's place on the statue. What about that
fat one in the damn New York Times statue.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Let's let statues go.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
They I feel like they're trying to pay us back
for taking down all of got that World War two
criminals right from around the country. I feel like they're
trying to pay us back. So he is resurrecting all
his bullshit. Nobody's asking for give us the money.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Right. That's that black girl at the time. Score.
Speaker 2 (10:38):
They ain't even put her in a qute outfit like
leaving McDonald's.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
Like I feel like her belly was hanging out a
little bit with her T shirt. Yeah, it was like
the real disrespectful and love with that girl her girls.
If you don't a statue can go to hell. So
that's statue got on my damn nerves, y'all. Soo young
thug is one hundred percent fulfilling his duties right because
(11:08):
under his release. Yeah, under his release, and like his
what is my brain? What's going on today?
Speaker 2 (11:16):
His his plea deal, his plea bargain. Right, there's certain things,
certain things he has to do.
Speaker 1 (11:22):
So one of them was like, you know, community service
and also like speaking to the youth and stuff like that.
So he put on a concert this weekend in front
of the Atlanta Courthouse. Okay, So Young Thug performs a
surprise concert in front of the full courthouse. Yeah, free
for his fans on Sunday. The rapper, who was previously
(11:43):
banned from Atlanta due to the terms of his probation
until condition was amended in December, announced the the surprise
show on Sunday, September twenty eight. So yeah, So he
tweeted a picture of the album cover. I'm trying to
figure out why he lights kin on the album cover?
Speaker 2 (12:00):
What was that about? That's what I was confused. I
thought that was someone just poking fun of him, but
he did that himself.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
Yeah, I don't know. Then he posted pictures of everybody
else white too. I was confused. Wonder maybe he like,
if we was white, would this happened to us?
Speaker 2 (12:16):
I don't know, had a reason with bullshit all the time.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
So I don't know why he was light skinned anyway.
You know, because when you see some shit real quick
on social media, like did I see that? You gotta
go back like who's that?
Speaker 2 (12:32):
It just made me think about Sammy Sosa ViBe's carteil.
Wasn't that Vibe Carteil? Like they're real white?
Speaker 1 (12:39):
Yes it is, so this says On the cover of Uy, Scottie,
thug brightened his skin and gave himself blue eyes and
a move that threw listeners off guard. After the project
went live, Thugger posted a carousel of photos of guest
artists who appear on the album, including a little baby, Quavo,
Sexy Red Timagine reimagined in a sandwich style, Yeah, excuse
(13:05):
me re imaged simular stop reimagined Beggar Thugger. Thugger captioned
the post my new friends the oh because he ain't
supposed to be around niggas.
Speaker 2 (13:19):
So not everybody white, that's what it is. Yeah, because
they abanded them from Atlanta. But you know Atlanta.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
When we think about Atlanta is Atlanta is literally just
a metro area, right, but you got all the other
you know, counties, areas, outside of Atlanta Metro Atlanta, so
you do not actually have to. But it's not right exactly,
So he's probably in Smyrna or I don't know, are
actually being Brookhaven, which is Buckhead essentially. So yeah, so
(13:50):
Thug hasn't given a concrete reason for the skin lightning.
The only clue comes from an Instagram post that went
live a few hours before the album's release, and it says,
if you want to be the biggest go white.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
I told you I'm good. I'm good at making reason,
making a reasonable Uh, I don't know out of bullshit?
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Again, did he not run it by nobody? Or like
was just like is this gonna hit? You know? Like
he his own man. You know another thing I saw
about him today he was doing an interview with somebody
I didn't care to go look and see. I'm sorry
who it was, who show it was, But he basically
said if mariot As scientists needed to go see a therapist,
(14:35):
he has failed as a man, because why you need
to go talk to somebody else? What? What? Literally? Bro, yeah,
you're probably sent her to a therapist, right, all of this?
Speaker 2 (14:51):
Definitely she told to somebody out side of you y'all
doing enough talking as far as I'm concerned, y'all need
to talk to other people.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
I'll talk to damn much. But that's kind of controlling,
like you don't want her seeking anybody, you know, because
I think that some people who haven't actually been to
theory meant to therapy, have a different idea about what
therapy even is.
Speaker 2 (15:13):
Like, they really don't give you no answers. It's not
like somebody's gonna tell her how to act or how
to be.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
Are to think? They try to. They try to make you,
like lead into your own resolutions.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
Yeah, So it's not like somebody's gonna say, hey, you
shouldn't be fucking with thugger.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
It's not a good man. He's been in prison, he
has several children. We gonna do that. The therapist ain't
gonna do that. Though, you are safe with this girl
going to therapy, right, it might make your relationship better
so or she might get the fuck about it here
right anyway, it's all better. Well, what are we talking today?
(15:51):
It's spooky season and we're talking about fear, not fear.
Ghosts and goblins and ghoules are they could be one
of your fears too, lions, right, But we're talking about
not being afraid. If I weren't afraid, all the things.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
I could do, So let's talk about that after this
commercial break.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
All right, y'all, we're back now. I have a question
for you. What would you do if fear didn't exist,
no limits, no judgment, just pure action. What would you do? So? See,
this is like I understand the question, but it should
(16:38):
actually read if prison didn't exist, what would you do?
Speaker 2 (16:44):
It was bitch a whole lot of shit? Okay, I'm
afraid to go to jail. I just got a shit
for real. The last year consequence I used to have.
I can tell you my number one fears, and I've
already met both. I used to always say, I'm afraid
of God and I'm afraid of ever being homeless. Those
(17:07):
were always my fears.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
And when y'all started, don't you gotta re imagine? You
gotta reimage? You can't like when you when you create
those things in your mind, like deep fears, you can
and manifest them. Right, So maybe if you like, if
(17:29):
you create the fear, create a solution for it at
the same motherfucking time. It's what I'm trying to say, right,
so those two things I have already met and conquered
in life. Essentially, you listen to everybody. Everybody.
Speaker 2 (17:41):
Level of homelessness is different. Okay, at your mama house,
it's homelessness, bitch. I'm at my mama house right now,
and I don't feel homeless.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Bitch. I felt homeless at my mama's house. I just
wear to god, I do.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
I'm ready for my own space again, like I've been
here since I broke my foot, and I'm ready be already, Like,
but I'm gonna give it till the beginning of the
year before I jump into anything else.
Speaker 1 (18:11):
Yeah, for reasons, but I get it. Homelessness is a
great I think that's a fear across the board for Americans,
and I don't think it was really Okay. I've never
been homeless. Okay, Okay, as long as my mom is breathing,
I'll never be homeless, right, But there is something freeing
right about not having to like pay to live life
(18:34):
for real. You could just go so wherever, Like I've
never lived any place for free, including my mama's house,
okay September, but I was able to pick up and
go and do what the fuck I want. I feel
like everybody should backpack in life at some point.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
This yeah, this last year, all right, So September is
the first month that I haven't paid rent, and that
shit felt good. I ain't gonna hold that shit felt nice.
I'm like, I don't owe anybody thousands of dollars.
Speaker 1 (19:00):
Before the right look at God, that shit was.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
But I also cannot smoke weed or walk around and
naked with a man, So there's that.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
So there is a trade off. Yeah, man, I just
like those were my biggest fears, and since being past
those things, I've had other fears. Right, I would say
one of one of my biggest fears that I've had
to overcome to move forward is literally just asking people
(19:37):
for help when you need it. That has always been
one of my biggest fears. Now I'm always the person
anybody can come to. I don't know it's because of
I don't know. I make it comfortable. It's just like,
I just know for a fact that people don't ask
people for shit that they think gonna say no.
Speaker 2 (19:53):
So every once in a while, shock the motherfucker a while,
be like no, you wasn't you wasn't you wasn't thinking
I was gonna.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
Say no this time. Yes, sometimes I will say no.
But I've always been the person people can come to.
But I can't think of anybody that I can go
to a lot of the times, like who ain't more
fucked up than me? And sometimes help is not always monetary,
you know what I'm saying. It's just like needing help
with a project or something like that, like finding somebody
who's gonna, I don't know, barter some services off. Just
(20:23):
asking somebody else for help has always been a big
struggle for me. I got some friends that really know
how to how to give work to other people, Like
what is the word I'm looking for? How to delegate? Really? Well,
that's me. I'm a delicate but I don't have a
problem with it.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
But I had to learn it too, because I found
myself in a hallway carrying a bunch of shit crying
somebody else's shit, crying because I was so overwhelmed with life,
like I'm over extending myself to other people so much
that I'm gonna I'm about to make myself sick. And
then after that, Babe, some shit changed, and now are
(21:04):
like when people come to me for shit, I'll help
them navigate all the other options.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
We can sit down and talk about all the other options.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
Un let's see if we've exhausted those. And if we
have exhausted all of those, then I'll help.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
Like money is the easiest thing for me to help with,
right because some people I just know, like, I'm gonna
get this money back, probably not from this person, but
I will get that money back before they would ever
see it, before they could ever pay me back. I'll
already have that money back. I just can make money
quicker than them, right. I know that about some people,
(21:41):
but my time, that's one thing I really like stend
you with nowadays because I would literally do shit for
people I don know, I feel like fucking doing now
know what's complete statement? My mom told me I was selfish,
and I'm like, you don't even really know me for real, right,
because nobody, none of my friends would say that Ashley
is selfish. Nobody would say that, right, But if you
(22:04):
want help her, cut grass girl, you selfish, Like, I'll
pay for somebody to come do it. But that is
not what I want to do with my Saturday. Sorry, right,
Like you're doing that ship for a workout, I'm gonna
go to the gym. We're air conditioning, but time. Like,
if somebody pick you up from the airport on time
or help you move like, they really love you. Like
I will do those things any airport.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
Pick if they pick you up from the airport, they
fuck with you for real heavy.
Speaker 1 (22:30):
Or take you want? Help you move, bitch. If somebody
come and help you move or pass, they really love you.
Speaker 2 (22:38):
And if someone clean your house for you, they love you.
Huh what to clean my friends houses? Really, I haven't
done it in a long time, though, I'll think about it.
But I definitely have friends where I come in and
clean their whole house for them.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
Now, I have cleaned the space i'm ana being in
someone's house. But to say I'm coming into another grown
woman's house and cleaning it. No, Now, if I come
and the bathroom is not to my liking, Like, don't
even worry about a baby, I'm cleaning. I'm cleaning the
area i'm ana being, but the whole house? Are you
a good friend? Job I have? I've definitely cleaned. I'm
talking shit, I'm like, why is this like that? Why
(23:16):
how long this spend? Like that house? Yeah, I've done it.
Hit they just do when they try to get a
guy to fall in love with them. They be over
there cooking and cleaning. The cooking and cleaning and near
your house not cleaning. That's bad. Okay, So now you
(23:37):
clean your friend's south, I will clean the nigga's house.
I'm gonna spend a lot of time over it, and I'm
just really just trying to make it comfortable for me.
It's not even for him. Still, it's not for you.
This dude I used to fuck with. If you're listening,
it was months year, a whole year in between us
(23:58):
seeing each other, And when I got to his place,
it's like nobody had touched that bathroom since I left
a year ago, because I would clean the bathroom all
the time. And when I got that, I'm like, who
is letting you fuck them with this bathroom? Like this?
Who letting you fuck them? I had let him fuck me,
(24:22):
but just one time because I was already there. But
who playing you fucking the regular? What this like? They're
not uthom when they come right that part.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
Jesus Like, if you go to a manhouse and you
feel like you gotta hover up all of his toilet
to use it, you probably shouldn't have sex on him.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
Hell don't know. And I'm pissing on your floor.
Speaker 2 (24:46):
Okay, I'm pissing all over your toilet. See, I'm just
treating your ship like you do. I'm pissing all over
this shit.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Guad station. This is sphinx bathroom. Bitch. This is no
fucking nigger of mine. Did you hear that?
Speaker 2 (25:04):
Er?
Speaker 1 (25:05):
This is no nigger of mine? That are crazy? All right?
What's one of my fears. I'm gonna share it with y'all.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
And this is hard for me to say, and it's
probably reflected in my social media. I fear look here ugly.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
I far it like.
Speaker 2 (25:26):
So I'm like, I'm so self conscious about how I
look on social media that I don't I end up
not posting nothing.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
I'll take a picture, I'd be.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
Like, that's cute, and then I'll analyze it seventeen thousand
different ways, and then I'll be like, I'm not posting that.
I would take outfit picks and I swear I'm the
baddest bitch in my outfit and feel like the baddest
bitch out in my outfit, and then I look at
myself in the picture and I'll be like, yours.
Speaker 1 (25:48):
Not you, girl, it's the fucking iPhone camera. I already
told you that shit. They fucking with our perception, so
we use these stupid ass filters. I know I look
bad in person than I do on the Internet.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
Yes, Internet, I'm too much finer than the Internet. And
then when I think videos. All right, so, y'all, I
got a nice smile, but these two bottom teeth, they
like the wisdoms tooth start growing in and they started shifting.
Speaker 1 (26:13):
And I feel like, curry b I'll be wearing low shirts.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
So you don't look at my bottom teeth because they cricketies.
Speaker 1 (26:21):
There, cut it out.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
They still looking at your face, girl, the face. They
looking at your smile, and don't nobody see them fucking teeth. Okay, no, no,
we we stole hard on that stuff.
Speaker 1 (26:33):
No I can. I can say I have sort of
the same fear. Right. First of all, I don't like
people my fucking life for real. But recently I saw
this girl's Instagram and she was big, honey, pretty face, okay,
big pretty, but stomach out Kuchie cut is on. She
in the drive through, in the driveway in her house.
She's like, fuck y'all, bitches, y'all just mad. Then I
(26:56):
don't give a funk.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
Y'all mad because I can get on here, look like
I'm looking and not give a damn. Had hell of
followers and people like authenticity, right, So of course if
we could just wake up and get on live, shit
would be lit.
Speaker 1 (27:13):
And not give a fuck. That's why I aspired to
you for I don't want to.
Speaker 2 (27:18):
I do I want to, I want to not. I
want to get online. I want to get on my
I g lap and not give a single solitary fuck.
Speaker 1 (27:25):
I want that, but I can't. It's so difficult. What's
unpack that a little bit? Because I feel like I
just you know how people be talking shit about women
wearing hair and make up all the shit, Like, bitch,
I'm gonna look like I'm going to a wedding every
fucking day, the same shit y'all natural bitches do y'all
when y'all gotta go to a wedding, y'all go, get
y'all a bus down, y'all, putash on top of y'all, dredge, y'all,
(27:49):
putsh on top of y'all, uh low cuts, Like I
want to look like that every day? What's wrong with that?
What's wrong with that? Nothing? I want to I want
to present my best every day, and I feel like
even like in relationships, like I remember my ex telling
me basically basically like not to wear my wigs. He
just want me to be comfortable. I'm comfortable like this.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
I'm not gonna be comfortable walking around with this shit,
this untreated ass fucking here.
Speaker 1 (28:17):
Okay, this shit as little as a motherfucker. I mean
it's stretches, but as little as I'm not comfortable. Yes,
I'm not gonna be comfortable like that. So what you
really think you're gonna do is like you think you
can take my swag. That's the cutting of the wig,
right he thought he was like taking my swag, No, bitch, like,
(28:38):
I'm still mean with without the fucking wig. I just
feel better when I look like I'm going to a
fucking wedding. And why would you not want your bitch
to feel good about yourself right at all times?
Speaker 2 (28:50):
But I think they want us to feel good about ourselves.
And it's full authenticity without weave, without lashes, without makeup, without.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
If all black women started pulling up just like that,
these niggas would definitely be leaving the community and droves
even more than they are now. That ain't with y'all.
Don't want y'all mama. It's your mama up under this wig. Nigga.
You don't want your mama. You want a bad bitch.
And all my ninge on my hinge.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
I like, I was courageous, right, And I was like,
I need these niggas to see me how.
Speaker 1 (29:27):
I am right?
Speaker 2 (29:29):
So I put one picture of myself of me in
a robe. It was you couldn't see all the robe, right,
but it was no, it was like you all these dates, bitch.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
It was my top, just the top, not even but
you could see the top of my rope.
Speaker 2 (29:43):
And I have on a bonnet and it's okay, And
like my edges is nappy and gray coming out in
front of the bonnet.
Speaker 1 (29:52):
And when I tell you, the niggas is on that picture, No,
nigga's definitely like an ugly bitch, okay. And I'm saying ugly,
Like how weed are feeling ugly? No?
Speaker 2 (30:00):
How you don't like when you know when you look
not looking the best and niggas be on you like
target so much. Picture, Yeah, and I'm surprised, like that
surprised me because I'm like, damn, that is just me,
like literally, in my mind, the most basic looking version
of myself, and it's all kinds of fishures in me
and workout gear and like looking you know, the dresses
(30:24):
on there and the one with me just in a
bonnet is like getting all the love.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
I'm like, oh shit, well.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
Maybe it ain't that bad out here when you got
like a mama and that one probably you just look
like you ready to be a wife.
Speaker 1 (30:36):
Wife. I feel like, why should not be walking around
all day with bond ands on? Okay?
Speaker 2 (30:41):
Men like you gotta feel, yes, you gotta bitch. If
you don't make it a fantasy for your nigga, he
can go look for one so and make sure make
sure you remain a fantasy. Men should na see all
the things? Why this nigga this weekend? He was like,
he was like, I almost.
Speaker 1 (30:57):
Saw your hair today, bitch.
Speaker 2 (30:59):
When I tell you I took that bonnet off and
put my hat weg on so quick, I mean you
missed it. And I was like, you wouldn't have seen
it anyway because I got a stocking cap or talking.
Speaker 1 (31:09):
You don't let them see your hair, not if it's
not first first of all. Like, right now, what I've
been doing is just slicking my shit back in the
point you tell it. I should not even like braided.
It's just like real rough right now. I am looking
for like somebody who specialized not your hairshit is cool,
but you do have to take care of your hair.
You do have to get treatments and stuff like that,
(31:31):
and I just haven't been. I haven't been taking care
of my hair. So I'm looking for somebody that I
can start a regimen with and take care of my
actual hair. But right now, it's no shape. It's just
bit you you know, you know what time it is,
so you sleep in your wing or you take it
off and just put on the hell no about it.
(31:51):
Oh no, that is miserable. No, I'm past that part, Lie.
Especially if we listen to list when I was like
just wags off.
Speaker 2 (31:59):
We would have man for the first time. And I
have them I'm wearing a wig. I let them know,
like when I come out the bathroom, my wig is
gonna stay in there, and I'm gonna put on a
bonnet or I might not. I want you to treat
my bonnet like a crown. Okay, that's what it is.
And don't be alarmed by the hair hanging up in there.
(32:22):
It's the long you're gonna be on my fucking head
because I cannot sleep like that. Yeah, but I don't
want to have sex without my hair though, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:30):
Bitch, because who ain't in there like a porn star
like flipping that shit. And don't pull it too hard,
but pull it. Yeah, we will barrow this pussy in
his hair, thank you.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
But I remember my last boyfriend. He used to do
it on purpose. He used to piss me off, like
when we were having sex, like dogy style, he'd take
my wig off and put it on his head. Stop
gay back my fucking hair ruining it for me?
Speaker 1 (32:56):
Let me find out you be wearing my shit when
I'm home. Look cute on you though, Stop, I remember
somebody's pulling my hair so hard, Like Okay, I'll glue
my wigs down sometimes and sometimes I don't, and I
have my shit blue down and nigga yanked me. Are
are you well?
Speaker 2 (33:14):
I don't know, wags, you're a bitch at the house
where But why are you pulling my hair hard like that?
Speaker 1 (33:19):
Like it's attached to my scalp? So like days where
I actually blew my shit down. Of course, I might
have to wear it to bed, like I wore my
hair to bed last night because I had shit to
do today. But on a regular day, no, I'm taking
that shit off. Have you ever remember I do having
a bonnet? Have you ever missed an opportunity because of
fear or delayed the goal or you know what? I
(33:43):
as an adult, I feel like I you know, I,
I definitely don't execute on all opportunities. And it's not
out of fear, though, it's out of fucking procrastination and laziness.
That's what I'm fighting more than fear every fucking day.
But I can remember as a child, and I recently
I was saying as how adults are really just dream killers.
You know what I'm saying. I remember like things I
(34:04):
wanted to do as a kid, and I was talked
out of doing it because of somebody else's fear. It
was never my fear, bitch. I've been a big personality.
So that's why if you don't have a parent to
cultivate that, you know, because of their fears not sharing
all your goals. Yeah, now you grow up, Yeah, that.
Speaker 2 (34:23):
People will unlock a new fear for you that you
didn't even have just by you sharing your dreams with them. Right, Okay,
new fear a lot.
Speaker 1 (34:32):
Right. I was talking to my homegirl today because she's
a whole fucking psychologist. Bitch. If you listening, sometimes I
have to be like, hey, because this bitch want map out.
She will map out her whole entire life. Like I'm
not like, I'm kind of like, go with the flow, bitch,
you figure it out. We got some time, She got
a whole I'm like, listen, I don't have all the
answers right now that you're asking me, like you're trying
(34:54):
to force me to map out the next nine fucking
ten months while I'm driving on the highway. I don't
got it. Don't ask me. Shit, I don't know what's
gonna happen, but it'll be figured out when it needs
to be. I have some procrastinations, my problem.
Speaker 2 (35:15):
I have some fears that I'm gonna share that are
gonna go. It's a little deeper, y'all, but we family
all here, and I'm gonna tell y'all my truth. This
is what this space is for. I fear.
Speaker 1 (35:27):
I'm afraid to be a mother, and I'm afraid not
to be a mother. Mm. Interesting, I'm not afraid to
like raise a child.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
I'm afraid of trying to have a child, like actually
the physical part of just because of my experience with
it before.
Speaker 1 (35:46):
That scares me.
Speaker 2 (35:47):
Then I'm afraid of picking a bad partner. M That
scares the shit out of me. But then I'm also
scared that what if I I'm like, I'm getting older,
what if I never become a mom? So those are
real life fears for me. What if you get a
serial killer? I mean you just never fucking know what She's.
Speaker 1 (36:09):
Yeah, you're just gonna have to go with with God.
Speaker 2 (36:15):
Because I mean, like when we're thinking about the simple oldfairs,
like shit could get worse.
Speaker 1 (36:19):
That's why, Like it'd be like the little things that
harass me. It's not ever like the big things. I
don't think. Okay, I've been past the fear of not
having children because I've had two tuber pregnancies years ago. Right,
I'm forty one now, and it's like that's just the reality.
I'm gonna get this bag though. I got two nieces
(36:40):
and a nephew, and I want to see them very,
very happy. Right, So if that's the way I gotta go.
I gotta go that route. I don't think it's Also,
it's not selfish for like say Frans is either one
or like I don't want to kids, this's over with.
I don't even fuck it. It's not selfish. It's not selfish
to not want to be responsible for somebody else for
the rest of your life, like your fucking life changes.
(37:02):
And without having had a kid yet, like I'm a
mother at heart, I'm a mom, like, so it.
Speaker 2 (37:08):
Doesn't scare me to actually have to have a kid.
And and but they don't stay little. You know, you're
gonna add with a teenager.
Speaker 1 (37:17):
I've always wanted a seven year old though, so I
can stay. My mama said, like, that's all I want.
My little girl will be saying, Well, my mama said, it's.
Speaker 2 (37:27):
Not the raising the kid that it's the physical part
of trying to push a kid into the world.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
I can't wait.
Speaker 2 (37:33):
That's security because I just my experience with it was
just not a healthy one, you know.
Speaker 1 (37:38):
So yeah, I can't wait. And I'm gonna do it
in the house in the pool. You're a bad bitch,
epidual me right now. Give me all Martyn medicine and drugs,
and you know, because I've had a tuer pregnancy and
I've actually been cut before, like the doctors will now
be inclined to like try to make me do like
a C section if I were to have a kid,
(37:59):
like I want to push not having no sea section
unless than my fucking stepping out this coochie feet first
like I did my mama. Okay, then I'll do a
sea section if they like breached or something like that.
You're not about to do a sea section around your
schedule because you got vacation is to I don't know
Italy next month, and that's what they be doing, scheduling
(38:19):
your child's birth around in their life, right the other
way around. Yeah, what else? I fear picking the wrong partner.
Speaker 2 (38:29):
I don't pick nobody, and then you just gotta pick
him in it. If it's not right, you just do
it again.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
I just can't pick. I just struggle with picking.
Speaker 2 (38:40):
So I'm always like dating people who are I'm always
entertaining people who I don't see future with. Like I'll
be like, oh, he's so young, this is fun. We'll
do that, but he's too young to be serious about
or he's cool, he's.
Speaker 1 (38:56):
Not talking keep talking so you can hear you bullshit.
Keep talking.
Speaker 2 (38:59):
I'm going I'm being honest right now, I'm being right. Yeah,
But I like my shit, you know my shit. My
fear is when it comes to relationships. I just I've
never been in a relationship where I wasn't forced. You
don't that, so I have to here with relationships. But
then I'm also afraid to get alone by myself. Yeah,
(39:23):
it's just so stupid, and it's so contradictory and so dumb.
Speaker 1 (39:27):
I just fear of picking the wrong partner. So I mean,
I guess I'm past that because I did that shit
a lot. Why not at another you know what I'm saying.
That's really how I be feeling. Boy Like, I love
love like. I'm never afraid to do it again. I
am never I will love like I've never been hurt before,
and I'm gonna keep doing it. I don't give a
fuck if I'm one hundred bitch, if I'm unhappy in
(39:49):
this marriage, I'm getting a fuck up out of there. Recently,
one hundred year old man or ninety something year old
man divorced his He's ninety six or something. His wife
is like ninety two and he divorced her because he.
Speaker 2 (40:00):
Found out that she cheated thirty or sixty years in
the fucking past.
Speaker 1 (40:07):
That'll be me. I'm not happy here. I'm one hundred
cave or walk cootie dry.
Speaker 2 (40:12):
I'm out of there. Yeah, I'm gonna start again, and
I think I can get me another nigga.
Speaker 1 (40:16):
Like I've been past that fear of standing in situations.
I don't even get you fucking long. I'm so scared.
I don't even get in this situation.
Speaker 2 (40:24):
Like if something about stay that, I won't even go
in that motherfucker try one.
Speaker 1 (40:30):
Just just pick go on and see what happens.
Speaker 2 (40:32):
I'm like, all right, So the movie guy, mm hm
sentia there, Okay, he yeah, there's potential there, so we'll see.
And I just watched that Boaz and Roof and y'all,
y'all need to watch that. I cried so hard watching
that movie because I was like, yeah, I want to
be in I'm like that it was so beautiful and
that man, it's so fine.
Speaker 1 (40:54):
And what's her name? I don't even know the movie.
You mentioned it to me today and I hadn't even It's.
Speaker 2 (41:02):
Like soyah soriah her she's so beautiful and Tyre.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
Lepley is just a god. He's in there and he
plays bowl ass.
Speaker 2 (41:14):
And I'm like, oh, yes, yes, send me that guy,
And that would just make you want to pray and
just be very you know, sincere about what you want
from a partner and who you want to be as
a partner. You know who you want to show up as,
so you know that.
Speaker 1 (41:33):
You got to be what you want. Right. So we
be having all these demands as women and you suck
run and run into somebody right that you wrote down.
If you want all these things out of them and
you're not ready as a woman for that type of man,
you gotta make sure you're ready for that type of man. Also, yep,
because that type of nigga comes like, ah, this bit stupid,
(41:53):
Like but don't know what you want, don't I don't
know what You gotta be sure you be decisive. You
know that part? Yeah, man. So that's something that's my fears.
That's like and.
Speaker 2 (42:07):
Another one that I'm really gonna share with y'all. I'll
be scared of like getting sick or being really sick.
That's a fear, like I'm sure everybody's scared to get
sick and be really sick and be. I don't want
to be It's the word I'm looking for.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
Burden. Yes, you took it right over my tongue. I
don't want to be a burden. Mm hmm. That's a
fear of mine. So I don't want to be alive
and sick. I'm not afraid to die, and I feel
like once you conquered the fair of death, you can
do anything on this planet. Okay, I'm more afraid of
prison than death. So it's my time to get the
(42:50):
fuck up out of here. I'm out of here. But
I do not want that's a fear of mine, to
be alive and sick, not to be sick, because I
feel like my body's gonna always fight me to have to, like, yes,
be a burden heard at somebody else, especially having children
and stuff like that, you know, like you know, just
I look at my parents. My my mama is in
(43:11):
pretty good health for her age, though she doesn't think
she is. She's in really good health. My stepdad not
so much, my daddy not so much, and my daddy
wife like shit, she's our age. Okay, I'm so grateful
that she exists because she could take care of him,
I wouldn't have to, but I think, uh, I wouldn't
(43:36):
want my kids to have to take care of me.
Speaker 2 (43:38):
Yeah, I don't want nobody. I don't want anybody to
slow anybody's life down because they taking care of me.
Speaker 1 (43:45):
That's a fear, you know. Yeah, that's a real fear. Mm.
Speaker 2 (43:50):
But nonetheless, I just be out here living like I'm fearless. Though,
But what else do you do?
Speaker 1 (43:57):
You know?
Speaker 2 (43:58):
But when it comes to that social media shit, y'all,
I just gotta lock it again because I know I
like both of us, we should both have at least
one hundred thousand followers by now.
Speaker 1 (44:11):
We should. We just want the money though. I'm gonna
tell y'all, I'm gonna be honest with y'all. Be honest,
be honest, fucking honest. I want to have enough money
so motherfuckers can't see me. I don't want like that
is not like this, And I know that's where we're
(44:31):
headed at with like AI and you know, getting rid
of actual jobs, Like you're going to literally be a
job now, right, so you're gonna have to figure out
a way to sell yourself to make money. That is
where we are with the social media, and not the
way you used to do it, like right used to shit, bitch,
I just tell them a loved one girl.
Speaker 2 (44:53):
Get each white of them niggas you fucking on to
give you a hundred dollars at least?
Speaker 1 (44:57):
That ain't even no money. I challenge that, bitch. I
love you girl, I challenged her. I said, listen, dollars,
there ain't no fucking money. Remember one year they had
a winter cold challenge. They have bitches hitting up the
nigga ain't fucking asking for on winter. Niggas was really
curving bitches by the winter cold. And you are in
(45:17):
the winter. A lot of y'all bitches fear asking niggas
for money. And that's where y'all got me fucked up
at now. I'm not I don't really ask men for money,
But I'm not fucking with somebody I know wouldn't give
me money if I need it. Okay, that's a difference.
I'm not fucking with. I'm not fucking with somebody who
can't at least take care of themselves, and I'm not
fucking with somebody who doesn't have the means if I
(45:39):
happen to need something, because I don't have a fear
of asking. I just don't because I feel like you
should just do because yeah, but they're gonna ask us
for anything they want without fear, without record, so I
don't have. You're gonna put like a little weird laugh
behind its. Yeah, and I'm mouth and your ears and
(46:01):
your fucking knows if they wanted you want to ask
for it. So stop having fear of the energy your youth.
Speaker 2 (46:09):
Yeah, okay, they were, so I don't have no fear
of asking, and I'll be real.
Speaker 1 (46:18):
How you doing? Tell me just how to ask for money? Tim, Hey, baby,
how are your day? And that's good? That's good. M
Did you had fun last night? I had such a
good time. Yeah. I want to ask you something. Remember
(46:39):
I told you about that thing I needed. I really
really would appreciate it if you could help me with that. Now.
Speaker 2 (46:47):
If you can't, it's fine, but if you could, it
would make me really really happy.
Speaker 1 (46:53):
Okay, thank you, I really appreciate me. And listen, don't
text people asking them money. You call them. You verbally
call And as I don't like somebody texting me about money,
I need you to call me and ask me verbally
for my damn money. I'm not gonna ask you what for.
I have no extra questions. If I can do it,
I'm gonna do it. If I can, I can't. If
(47:14):
you need some money from that man, you gotta get
him at face to face, all over the phone, FaceTime
or something. He gonna have to tell you no to
your face, girl, and I will always gonna be hard.
I didn't really mention what I want before I ask
him for it too. Mm hm, Like what like, I
don't know, Like something you saw that you want to
(47:35):
want to buy? It's this class I want to take.
Speaker 2 (47:39):
I like, yeah, it's this class, and I think it
would really help me with what I'm trying to do.
Speaker 1 (47:44):
Blah blah blah. But it's five thousand dollars. Man, it
is crazy. Yeah, it's crazy. But if you do, if
you know ten niggas, you do that to each one
of them, you could at least you could fundraise amongst
your contacts in your cell phone, crowd sharing with your niggas.
It's fundraising. Go fund me, yeah, fund me. But I
(48:10):
ain't like people have the time for that many people
I'm talking, I feel like, I don't know why. I
just feel like most of the people who listen to
the podcast, are like younger, yeah, so, and I know
they are afraid to ask h men for money. It
was a time I might have been afraid, but then
you realize that, like Damn said, they don't give a
(48:32):
god damn, they are asking you for whatever it is
they want. Hold chest out and yeah, and then guess
what if he say no, you could just lock the list.
Now you got to deal with him. I definitely ask
niggas for money when I get want to get rid
of it. I won't leave a nigga. I won't leave
a nigga alone.
Speaker 2 (48:50):
If he say no for a good reason, if he
has a good reason why he can't, well, if he
don't just don't want to, then you got.
Speaker 1 (49:00):
I remember one time I asked this dude I used
to fuck with. I was in college at the time,
but you know Meastionnari and Vonder living in an apartment together,
and I asked him for the pet fee, if he
would pay my pet fee for my dog and he
told me no. He was like, dang, some shit, I
want to spend money on. No, this is very important
(49:24):
to me. It's my dog. I just stopped talking to him.
And this is somebody I haven't talking to for years, Like, no,
what do you mean? I'm confused And it ain't even
that much. Yes, I'm asking you for like three hundred
and fifty dollars.
Speaker 2 (49:38):
Okay, hold out in college, that was a lot. This
was a grown man. This is not a college student.
Oh okay, this is somebody's father. Oh okay, daddy.
Speaker 1 (49:49):
If you don't pay for this, yeah yeah, pay for this.
Like what do you I mean? Yeah, that's the quickest way.
And I mean if you don't like a guy anymore,
that is also, like I said, the quickest way to
get rid of him, ask him from some outlandish amount
of money like ten grand or something like that. Man,
that nigga ain't never calling you again. You're he might
call you in a year, lady, like like, hopefully you
(50:10):
forgot about Yeah you forgot that. I ask for it again,
stilling it. I still need that land and getting the
handlob like stitched up the heavy earrings weird. And that's
only like three hundred five hundred dollars. You could get
that done quick. I need the whole blue ear nigga
ten thousand, because I said no, I can't hear no
(50:32):
what Shay. I'm trying to think if I have any
other like super fear. I used to be afraid of
the dark. I used to be afraid to sleep on
my back. I have conquered all those things. Like I said,
I was afraid of the dark, and I was afraid
to sleep on my back because I was afraid of
death and laying on my back felt like a coffin.
But now I intentionally sleep on my back because it's
good for your health and it's good to make sure
(50:54):
your body is aligned as much as possible in the
soft ass fucking mattresses, on soft mattresses. I'd be too,
I'll be like I would prefer that, not yet though,
Like that's how.
Speaker 2 (51:06):
I want it at ninety eight, not not in nineteen
ninety eight, you know, at ninety.
Speaker 1 (51:12):
Eight, so on nine to twenty eight exactly, see you.
Speaker 2 (51:17):
No, I don't want that. I just want I don't
want to die in my sleep yet. That's a fear
that's been a fear.
Speaker 1 (51:22):
Of mine, dying young. Like you know, I don't yeah
all of that. Yeah, I'm still trying to figure out
what happened with my homegirl. And it's just like her
mom just says she was. She came home and she
was in the recliner. And you know, one thing that
makes me so sad about that is that she didn't
(51:44):
have like a peace of mind before leaving the planet.
Like she was struggling and she was trying to get
out of her mom's house. You know what I'm saying, Like,
depression can really set in when you end up back
in the place you're raised in, Okay, so you really
got to go in with a plan to get the
fuck up on out of there. And she just it
just you know, she was just piling up. It was
(52:05):
just piling up. I just knew. I almost feel like
she just let go, you know what I'm saying, Like,
I just feel like she just was like, let me
get the fuck up out of here. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (52:15):
And it's but I mean I try. I'm like, at
this stage of my life, I'm trying to It's the
fear of the unknown, right because we know, we know
that we gotta die, all of us, right, But it's
just not knowing what's next. And so I just tried
to always visualize that what's next is better than what's now.
(52:38):
And it's hard because you just don't know. You all
these stories about heaven and hell and the places you
can go. And you know, I mean, nobody wants to
go and burn.
Speaker 1 (52:51):
You remember when Tie passed, how you went to school
with us, went to Benedict, finally got murdered. Yes, So
the week before Ty passed, one week to the day
that he passed, he had posted a picture of him.
I forgot the guy who was in the picture with him,
somebody from Benedict too, but he posted a picture he
and it said live because we did a lot longer.
(53:12):
And I commented and I said, do we really know that?
And he commented back, was like I think we do.
One week later he was out of here and I
went back and I commented. I was like, you know,
rest in peace to whatever one of us now gets
to experience the unknown, because I don't think this is it.
And that's why like this, like this is not this
(53:33):
the way this world that we live in is set
up where children are abused, murdered, kidnapped. It's just a
hell realm. It's nothing good about this place, you know
what I'm saying, Like evil prevails around it Like no,
I don't know if not, Like I just it's listen,
a new Earth is coming right, So things are starting
(53:53):
to be unveiled. But it takes it takes a lot
of people to be aware of the evil that actually exists,
because people don't think that these things are actually happening
in this world. No, I know they they don't think
it's a three four hundred thousand black women missing in
America annually, teenage girls like this ship is fucking happening.
This is not a good place, so there has to
(54:16):
be a better place than this. I ain't coming back.
I just I'm lif fath number nine bitches over with
for me. I just hope that there's coffee at the
next place. You're a vampire. You love coffee. Vampires drink
coffee so they don't eat drink blood. They don't have
to urge to drink blood. Get you, some macha, bitch.
(54:38):
Not you hope there's coffee. A different type of meat.
You said, some proper ship, and then I was like,
ohe they got coffee a chickenweed. You know you want
a different meat. You want to what I want?
Speaker 2 (54:52):
Some shit tie down the same old meat.
Speaker 1 (54:58):
They just break some blue meat. That be great, though,
like a new meat that takes meat you ever had before.
I eat this veggie meat from the factory and Rowley
chickpea burger. It is so good. Remember those little nuggets
from Whole Foods. Somebody used to get those, order them? Yeah,
I ordered those, that's veggie. I ordered those directly from
(55:19):
the factory. Now, like that is a good protein. What
the fuck was that you had to these little nicely
seasoned cardboard done? Yet this she used to be busting
your last busting her last laugh About fear, Ah, nothing
fear is fear but fear itself. Nothing fierce fear but fears.
(55:43):
He like, don't fear, listen, just do everything trembling and
fear and and fear. Just still do it, though, push
through because once you push through that fair the other
side is so fucking miraculous, amazing eggs. So one another.
Fair is public speaking? Right? And I have actually done
(56:05):
a couple, yes, And isn't that weird? I have done
not like not like public speaking while I'm just getting
up there talking shit. I mean like in a professional setting,
public speaking type thing, right where I have to really
uh articulate for the niggas in the room, Like, I mean,
(56:25):
one thing, you just gotta know what the fuck it
is that you're talking about. You're talking about. Yeah, I've
done toast masters several times, and I have not kicked
the fear of public speaking. I haven't. I start sweating,
Like once I get up there and start talking, I'm cool,
but I'm gonna stutter. I'm gonna farnt. I'm gonna sweat
(56:46):
far up there. Far. You really got to imagine to
hope the mic ain't like these condense ther mics. Okay,
I hope you don't pick up everything, because yes, I'm
a farnt too, and I'm gonna be sweat. But do it,
my still't do it? Yeah? Do it?
Speaker 2 (56:59):
Fear a disease, you guys, don't let it into your
spirit the best you can. And if you encourages not
being without fear, courage is doing it in that spite
of fear.
Speaker 1 (57:12):
Exactly, be courageous in all things. I challenge you all, listening.
Speaker 2 (57:17):
To the sound of our voices, to pick one thing
that brings you fear in your life right now, and
I want you to attack that fear with all the
ferocity you have in your body. Just one thing this
week that makes you afraid, that makes you scared. I
want you to attack that thing even.
Speaker 1 (57:37):
If it's that nigga, don't be putting his hands on you.
Pull me over there. We could double team him together.
Whoever it is.
Speaker 2 (57:45):
Fear him, attack that thing, y'all, because there's somebody listening
getting the ass beat.
Speaker 1 (57:51):
It's just inevitable. Oh yeah, that's at least abody. Yeah,
call me. I'll pistol whoop your nigga for you. I
promise you will, because on that one, I'm not fighting.
I'm patting like once I broke my foot.
Speaker 2 (58:06):
The all the fight that I had in me left
that for three him your friend that will call the
police for you, I doubt fast shame.
Speaker 1 (58:16):
All right, y'all, you enjoy this episode, y'all. Tune in
every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app wherever the fuck you
get your podcasts at. This is your co hosts a
j Holiday two point zero on Instagram's kick of Tam.
Speaker 2 (58:28):
Y'all, It's official Tambama on Instagram. Also, we have We
Talk About podcasts, y'all. Follow us there, y'all. Remember speak
now and neighverhold your fears, fuck fear, fucked them fears,
period deuces.
Speaker 1 (58:41):
We Talk Back podcast is a production of iHeart Radio.
Visit the iHeartRadio, app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen
to your favorite shows.
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