February 3, 2021 • 27 mins
It’s one of the first big decisions you’ll make for your baby—their name. This week, Heidi and Emma break down the biggest baby name trends, and everything from how to deal with opinions from family, to the biggest questions and best baby name advice from the What To Expect community.
Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Who baby A baby? I need you, Oh hell, I
need you. What to Expect is a production of I
Heart Radio. I'm your host Heidi Murko and I'm a
mom on a mission, A mission to help you know
(00:21):
what to expect every step of the way. A baby
by any name would smell a sweet. That's just a fact.
So what's in a name? Too soon to be parents,
whether they're expecting their first bundle or their fifth, a
lot hangs on that name. Choice names are, after all,
(00:41):
for life, for better, for worse, for mispronounced from misspelled.
Some parents have those baby names picked out before they
even start trying to conceive boy less and girl less
first names and middle names. Lucky them. But if you're
still not sold on a name or family only feuds
are fueling a contentious debate, or you're just playing stressed
(01:04):
about the responsibility of naming the bundle you'll soon be
bringing home, you're not alone. Lucky you. We're here to help. Today.
We are breaking down latest trends in baby names and
your biggest questions about what to call your little one.
Besides sweet, I'm here with Emma. A baby I named personally.
(01:26):
I like it, I didn't like it. When I was
like nine, I wanted to be in Michelle after Michelle Tanner.
But um, now I'm happy with it. Okay, how did
you choose Lennox and Sebastian. So Lennox I looked at
like a literature baby name book. One night in the
middle of the night when I couldn't sleep, I was like, oh,
I love Lennox. It's like a Shakespearean play. I think
(01:48):
it's King Lear and his middle name is Page after
Jimmy Page. Sebastian's name is a lot more fun. I
wanted to name him something else, and my husband's like, no,
we have to name a Sebastian. What did you want
to name like West or something. I don't know. There's
a kin Lennox's class names now, so it would be weird. Yeah,
so with your names, um, Emma, I love the book
(02:08):
by Jane Austen, so that was a no brainer. Now, Wyatt,
we didn't know the gender with either one of you,
so if why it had been a girl, he would
have been Willa, which I still wish I had another
girl to name Will. I love that name. He broke
the mold with me, Mom, true that with why we
were all set on the name Winston until like thirty
seven weeks when Eric just all of a sudden realized
(02:34):
the baby's names should be Wyatt. He's a big fan
of Western so that made sense. He's not a Winston,
he's so a Wyatt. So how far into your pregnancy
were you when you knew the gender? So that gave
you a head start. Um, I don't pretty like immediately
like he was like, okay, it's Sebastian. Okay, um, and
then Lennox I think halfway through. Okay. So baby names
(02:57):
here in the US, of course, anything seem to go um,
and not just when it comes to celebrity baby names anymore.
People get super creative, and for the most part in
the US, you can by law and name your baby
anything you want to. I mean, there are some states
that limit the total number of letters if you add
(03:18):
up the first, middle, and last name, so it can
all fit on a legal form um. But those letters
can spell just about anything. No number. Elon Musk learned
about the hard way. No numbers, yes, but in other
parts of the world apparently not so much. I did
not know this until I was digging a little bit.
But baby names are actually restricted by law in some countries,
(03:40):
and that's including countries like Denmark, Norway, Sweden, Germany, New Zealand.
For instance, in many countries, you can't name your baby
something that could be potentially embarrassing or have them made
fun of or negatively impact a child's well being. Some
obvious example balls would be Satan Hitler Anus. Yeah, you
(04:05):
can't name your baby anus. Governments have also rejected names
that are even more random, like sexy fruit I'm still
stuck on anus um. Also, unconventional spellings of traditional names
are discouraged now. Some countries like Norway and Sweden, require
that a first name sounds like a first name. Anderson.
(04:25):
You can't name your baby Anderson, So sorry about that,
Anderson cooper um. Some countries banned brand names, and that
would include some names that are pretty popular here like Chanel,
Mercedes and in Sweden you can't name your kid I Kea.
I'm okay with that. Some countries don't allow names that
aren't gender specific, like the name has to tell you
(04:48):
right away whether it's a boy or girl, So a
lot of favorite names here would be out, like Charlie.
I love that super cute Charlie, so cute for a girl,
but apparently it's not legal in Germany and Iceland. There
are also plenty of baby name traditions from around the
world that date way back. In some parts of Africa,
I thought this was so sweet. An elder in the
(05:11):
village picks the name and whispers it into the baby's
ear before they announced it at the baby naming ceremony,
because the belief is that the baby should hear his
or her name, especially beautiful thing I've ever heard. You know,
Let's take a quick break and when we come back,
we're going over our community's biggest questions about baby names. So, Emma,
(05:50):
let's read through some of these messages from what to Expect.
So we looked at some of the posts about baby
names on the what to Expect community message boards, and
there's a lot of them. We pulled out some of
the topics of conversation you all have. Um Emma, let's
read through some of these and discuss on the other side.
What are the most popular ways people come up with names,
(06:14):
I mean, besides just liking how it sounds for the moment.
I actually signed thousands of books a year, and I
have heard just about every baby name out there. Oh yeah,
I bet I've heard it all. I've spelled it all.
And there are a lot of families, you know. I
sign a lot of books from military families, and a
(06:35):
lot of those families the tradition is you give your
baby dad's name. Um, so it's a lot of junior seconds,
thirds force five. I've had six. I think I'm not
sure I went any higher than that that would be impressed.
Some families actually just used the same name for the
father and son, so for instance, Marcus and Marcus, not
Marcus senior and Marcus juior, Marcus Marcus. Some do diminutives,
(07:00):
like Jonathan and Johnny. Um, wasn't it George Foreman who
named all his sons George. I looked it up and
he gave each one a number two, So George one
George too. It's a little confusing maybe, but I guess
you don't get the names mixed up. That's a plus. Um,
some people do. I think this is so cute. Some
people do. See jays for you know, Christopher John or
(07:23):
John um ore J's t js and I feel like
those are names that you know, sure their nicknames, but
their nicknames that you can grow with. Biblical names are
always popular. Some people choose them because they're religious. Some
people just choose them because their traditional names. Some families
(07:44):
keep the biblical theme going for all their kids. So
you've got Samuel, Noah, Isaac. Isaiah is one that I
always forget how to spell Ezekiel, or let's say Mohammed, Aliyah,
Hannah esther all. This ancestry dot com has brought back
a lot of ancestral names. Now. Some parents named baby
(08:08):
after where they were conceived. So, Emma, you would have
been Greenwich Village. I know a mom on Instagram said
Hayden Park after the neighborhood where her baby was conceived.
That's really pretty. Yeah, it's really pretty. It's like Beyonce's
line Ivy Park. I'm not mad. A lot of military
families were always moving around from base to base. Sometimes
(08:30):
they choose the name from the place that they're based
when the baby's conceived, so like Hawaiian name and Italian name,
a Japanese name. I had a mom who didn't know
the baby's gender yet when I signed her book, so
I signed it to both the boy and girl named.
The boy name was going to be Ben after Big Ben,
not Benjamin Benn and the girl name was going to
(08:51):
be Abbey, after Westminster Abbey. That cute. Um celebrity names.
One mom told me Reese Witherspoon. She named her baby Reese.
I think there's been a run on Chase. I'm not
sure if that was from Chase Crawford or whether it's
from Pap Patrol if they have a younger kid, maybe
(09:13):
Pap Patrol. When I was in high school, that name
was pretty popular to Chase. I like that name. It's
a good, sturdy name. I think it's coming back, making
a comeback. Sophia is like super popular. I think it's
like at the top of the list right now. But
it's not from Sophia Lorenne. That's what somebody a few
people told me on Instagram. It was after Sophia Lorene. H.
I finm sure names like Blake for Blake Lively. Also,
(09:37):
I'm sure a lot of character names. Yeah, I've heard
a lot of movie characters. So Aurelia from Love actually
is one that I've heard several times. One of my
favorite all time movies. Oh yeah, that's a big one.
Disney characters, UM names from music, characters and books. UM.
Somebody mentioned characters from Game of Thrones. I've never seen it. Aria,
(10:01):
I haven't seen I saw like one season, but that's
a big one. Okay, Eighties TV and movie characters, especially
for moms of a certain generation. I have no idea
any of those constellations, stars, planets, mercury. I hear a
lot of Greek gods. I get Adonis, Apollo, Ena, Venus, whoa, Yeah,
(10:25):
I've seen a lot of newborn adonis Is. That's adorable.
Donnie Presidents Kennedy. Oh yeah, that's great for I know
a girl Kennedy. Also, you can use that for both genders. Yep, Theodore,
I love that. Teddy Rosevel Well, I love Teddy so
that I know a teddy girl. And President's kids like Malia.
(10:47):
That's a great one from President Obama. Sports figures Nolan
after Nolan Ryan. There's also a naming tradition, a Jewish
naming tradition, where you name your baby after a relative ooside,
but you don't necessarily have to use that particular name,
but the name should start with the same letter. There's
also names that come from tragedies, like this year, there
(11:09):
have been a lot of Koby's and Gianna's. I also
wonder if Ruth is going to make it come back.
Maybe Ruth Bader. That's the cutest little girl name ever, Ruth,
are you kidding? Best legacy ever? Old school names. So
I love when babies are named like old people, because
(11:29):
don't they look like little men anyway? A lot of
the time they do. It's literally like Benjamin Button. The
name kind of fits. So Grandpa names like Daddy is
or Eugene. That's the best time ever. Parents Bernard, will
my heart be Stanley? And then this grandma names like Irene, Mabel, Harriet, Edith, Dorothy,
(11:55):
eleanor has made a huge comeback, Florence. You can call
it baby flow yeah, except anything about the progressive I know.
I was thinking that at the same time. Everyone it
for me, but God or your aunt flow right, Please
somebody naming your baby Wilber I know, and or Clarence
and then d m me and show me a picture
(12:15):
of them, or Mabel or d m me too. Um.
And then when people go by the meaning of the name,
some people don't care. We didn't care, but somehow your
name's actually fit the meaning. So Emma comes from all embracing,
which I did not know until I looked it up.
But all embracing. That's totally you. That's me Why it
(12:37):
means strong, brave, and hearty, which is like incredible because
his preschool teacher when he was to described him as stoic.
I really don't know many two year olds who are
described as stoic, but that's why he's definitely stoic, completely
someone you've met. Sometimes parents will name their kids after
(12:58):
someone they've met once they really like the name, or
someone you know, you babysat for now. Popularity is a
funny thing. No one named their kids Emma or Wyatt.
When we did, we thought we were picking names that
would never become popular, and go figure, they're super super popular.
So there's really no guarantee that when you pick your
(13:20):
name that is going to remain uncommon. Um. Some people
like to avoid super popular names. Others embrace trends. They
hear a name, they hear it a lot, they like it,
they use it, it doesn't matter if it's about to
break the top ten. Others look for names that are
not too popular, not too uncommon, you know, just right.
(13:41):
It's it's a very important choice. I need to tell
you one funny story. One mom told me that her husband,
when he was in high school. He had Bob Marley
come to him in a dream. Really yeah, and he
promised for some reason, he promised Bob Marley and his
dream to name his firstborn son after him. And so
(14:06):
you know, she met him. They got married, not her
and Bob Marley, her and her husband. And he said, well,
by the way, our son has to be named after
Bob Marley. And she didn't like the name Bob. She
didn't like the name Robert, so they named their baby Morley.
Their firstborn son was Morley, and then they wanted to
keep the music theme, so they named the second one
Morrison and call may. So it's so cute, Maury, that's
(14:29):
so great. Have you ever heard of people inventing their
own name. I feel like that's really popular. Yeah, that's
very popular, and you can definitely do that, um, at
least if you live in the US. Some people blend
two names together. Sometimes they change a letter, like instead
of Olivia, it's Olivia with an A, or Arissa instead
(14:49):
of Alissa or Marissa. But I feel like changing names
is great because that's solidified that you won't have a
name that's like super popular. Even if the name was popular,
the spelling is different, so of like keeps you in
that unique little bubble. Yeah, some people do Brianna instead
of Brianna. You can take Oakley and make it Oaklynn.
I've heard that a lot. But then your kid gets
(15:12):
to the gas station or the souvenir shop and there
are no key chains or cups. There's never a key
chain for either of my kids. No, And it's funny.
There were no Emma's back when you were growing up.
There were no Wyatts. Maybe there are now now we're
lousy with Emma's now they probably are. But actually, you know,
that could be a blessing, one mom pointed out, because
then you don't have to buy all those collectibles. True,
(15:34):
there are a lot of tricky spellings too, and sometimes
they're on purpose, sometimes not. There must be seventeen ways
to spell Riley and Kayla and Kylie and Mackenzie. I
mean even Sarah has to well, actually three ways. I
know Sarah who spelled s e r A. I met
(15:54):
a mom whose father misspelled her name on her birth certificate.
I wish I could remember for the name. It was
something super it was super simple, and he didn't know
how to spell it, so he put the wrong spelling
down and she had to live with it. But you know,
of course now it's a great story, that's amazing. And
then of course there's misspelling on purpose creative spelling. My
(16:17):
sister's name is Sandy with two ease, and that said
my name is Heidi, but nobody can spell it. Really,
there's no tricks. It's just nobody can spell Heidi. Well,
sometimes people spell my name with one M. It's rare,
but it happens. So what about thinking whether the name
has a nickname? Like some just naturally do some don't.
(16:41):
I remember when you named Lennox, we were thinking, oh,
that means we're going to call him Len, and he
is such a Len. We call him Len all the time.
It's so cute. With Seby, I don't even call him no,
I don't ever call him Sebastian. I think that, you know,
you really you need to sit there and like trying
(17:01):
to think of all the nicknames that your kid could
possibly have, because school, school can be rough. What happens
if you and your partner do not agree on the
name that I feel like the finals say should be
going to the person who pushes that child out, that's true,
or gives birth to it. Somehow did the heavy listing parents?
(17:24):
You know, sometimes they had a mom who told me
she and her husband talked about it on their first
date and apparently they agreed on the name so they
could move to the next step. That's a very important
first stake conversation. I know some parents have kept a
list since high school. I have, and you didn't use
(17:44):
any of them like that. No, I've been in the
awkward position of signing books. You know, the mom's there
and she doesn't like the name the dad wants, and
the dad doesn't like the name she wants, and so
they asked me to sign the name that they like.
And I feel that's a lot of pressure, A little
awkward about that, but still some people take it so
(18:07):
seriously they actually do bracket a limit. My husband, you know,
I let him have it because it was his first
and it was my second. So I was like, you
know what you do you okay, if you decide on
a name during pregnancy, should you tell your friends and family?
I feel like I did not tell. The majority of
(18:30):
my family told us. I mean my extended family. I
told a few people, but I kept it on the dal.
A lot of horror stories I've read on what to
Expect message boards of moms sharing names and people making
negative comments, which is I've seen that that's so mean. Yeah,
you can think it, but don't say it, or write it,
(18:53):
write it in a on a piece of paper and
just throw it in the trash. Should they never seen you?
Don't say it out loud. Now. A lot of moms
told me they actually like to share the name so
that they get personalized gifts for their babies. But I
did have one mom who did a gender reveal with
the name. Everything was picked out a whole nine yards,
picked out the registry based on the gender only, and
(19:15):
turned out when the baby was born he was a
she and they had to redo everything. I mean, it
doesn't happen often that those mistakes were me, but it
does happen for me that I feel a little guilty
about it, because what about the peanut gallery, Like, what
should you do if there's pressure from a family member
to name the baby after a relative or to use
(19:36):
a letter in honor of someone and you don't want to.
I really don't know why people think they get a
vote on someone else's baby. I mean, even if it's
their grandchild. They just don't get a vote. I mean,
opinions from the Peanut Gallery about your Peanuts name should
not matter. The problem is that they actually can hurt,
(19:59):
and they can hurt a lot. I mean, this is
how I look at it. You made this baby together,
you raise the baby together, you pay babies bills together,
You get to name the baby together without outside interference.
You are the only ones who should have a vote.
I mean that doesn't stop mothers and mother in laws,
(20:21):
fathers and father in laws from giving their two cents
and even saying, you know, I've heard some incredibly hurtful
things that family members have said, laying on the guilt
when they don't like your choice. That's not fair, or
getting all passive aggressive about it, or pressure and you
(20:41):
even some family members pressure parents to change the name.
It's so messed up. Emma, one of the moms on
your Instagram said she listened to the Peanut Gallery, actually
changed her baby's name based on the Peanut Gallery and
still has name recrap. I mean, I think that's so
beyond unfair and messed up. You should name your child
(21:03):
what you want to name your child, not what your
mother in law wants you to name your child. She
got to pick her son's name, she should let you
and your husband pick your name. And also, I don't
think it's fair that if you have decided on a name,
for anybody to have any sort of voice in that.
You know, if you're kind of throwing names out there,
it's okay to say, I mean it's not my favorite,
but I like this one more. That's fine, But you
(21:25):
don't need when that name is solid, you know what,
just let it go. You know what happened with your
middle name? My mother hated it and we ended up
because I felt so super guilty and I was so hormonal.
We added another name to your your official name, just
to a piece er, and we totally regretted it and
we never used it. She didn't like my first name either.
(21:46):
Did she know she didn't like any of it? Yes?
So the only two people who should be able to
change baby's name, in my opinion, are the parents. I say,
tell them to butt out nicely, firmly or not nicely,
if that's what it takes. The hormones talking. I'm pregnant.
(22:18):
Can we really wait to decide on name until the
baby is born? Is it true that you just know
when you see them or know that like that's not
the right name. Three months ago you see your kids like,
oh that is not a Freend, that is a Henry.
You know, it sounds like a movie cliche, but in
fact a surprising number of parents say this. Um, there's
(22:42):
still the minority by far like need to know ahead
of time, but sometimes, you know, kind of use that
birth moment to solidify how they feel about a name,
to confirm that it fits. Um. Most parents have at
least one name picked out already. Some actually do. I've
heard several cass of parents changing the baby's name because
(23:02):
it didn't fit once they held their baby. Usually they're
not starting from scratch. Um, they've got a list of contenders.
One thing that's actually I remember giving birth, you were like,
come on, Sebastian's coming. Like it gave me that push
that I was about to meet a person with a
name rather than just a baby. I don't know for me,
that was kind of helpful during delivery. Any other tips
(23:24):
or things that you know we really should be aware of.
There's an article and was respect dot com with women
saying what they wish they've known before they picked their
baby names. Some of the biggest takeaways pay attention to
the initials. Babies with TRD, for instance, as initials. That
sounds like turd, Alyssa Samantha Smiths. That makes an ass
(23:45):
out of you and me. Amy Schumer remember changed her
baby's name after realizing the gene ATel sounded like genital.
I'm not mad at that, though, I mean Lennox is
lp A little People's Association of America and SETTI is
s s A, which is Social Security Administration. Oh, you're right,
(24:06):
that's cute. One mom suggests that don't waste the middle name.
You might need it one day if you have another
baby of the same gender. Also important, say it out loud. Surprisingly,
some parents never end up saying the baby's name out
wowd they write it down. You know. Something else to
remember is that you can change your mind. You can
change your mind right up until you signed the birth
(24:28):
certificate and leave the hospital. Sure, a lot of people
do that, by the way, like a lot of people,
A lot of people do. I know a pair of
parents that debated for two days and finally settled before
they were discharged, and another mom on what to expect,
regretted not knowing this because she ended up with a
name like that she was coming up with under pressure.
(24:50):
She didn't really like it, but she felt pressured by
the nurses to sign the papers, and so she settled
on it. I'm sure she loves the baby, of course.
Here's my biggest takeaway my baby name. Bottom line, it's
your decision. It's a lot of pressure anyway to pick
out a name for life, so you have to make
sure you pick one without added pressure from anyone else.
(25:13):
Take your time, be open to change in your mind
when you meet your baby, and don't let anyone tell
you what to do. It's up to you and your partner.
I have to share one thing that a mom said
that was just so incredibly sweet. She said, whatever name
you choose, make sure you feel love, enjoy when you
say it. And for me, that says at all. Once
(25:37):
everyone holds that sweet baby of yours, the name will
be just as sweet. Baby love, my baby love. I
need you, Oh how I need you. Thanks for listening.
Remember I'm always here for you. What to Expect is
(25:59):
always here for you. We are all in this together.
For more on what you heard on today's episode, visit
what to Expect dot com slash podcast. You can also
check out What to Expect when You're Expecting, What to
Expect the First Year, and the What to Expect app.
And we want to hear from you. Connect with us
on our community message board or on our social media.
(26:22):
You can find me at Heidi Murkoff and Emma at
Emma Being w t E and of course at What
to Expect. Baby Love is performed by Riley Beater. What
to Expect is a production of I Heart Radio. From
more shows from I Heart Radio, check out the i
heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to
(26:45):
your favorite shows in my Arms, what on, Just Stain, Nija, Nija,
Baby Baby four
Who baby A baby? I need you, Oh hell, I
need you. What to Expect is a production of I
Heart Radio. I'm your host Heidi Murko and I'm a
mom on a mission, A mission to help you know
(00:21):
what to expect every step of the way. A baby
by any name would smell a sweet. That's just a fact.
So what's in a name? Too soon to be parents,
whether they're expecting their first bundle or their fifth, a
lot hangs on that name. Choice names are, after all,
(00:41):
for life, for better, for worse, for mispronounced from misspelled.
Some parents have those baby names picked out before they
even start trying to conceive boy less and girl less
first names and middle names. Lucky them. But if you're
still not sold on a name or family only feuds
are fueling a contentious debate, or you're just playing stressed
(01:04):
about the responsibility of naming the bundle you'll soon be
bringing home, you're not alone. Lucky you. We're here to help. Today.
We are breaking down latest trends in baby names and
your biggest questions about what to call your little one.
Besides sweet, I'm here with Emma. A baby I named personally.
(01:26):
I like it, I didn't like it. When I was
like nine, I wanted to be in Michelle after Michelle Tanner.
But um, now I'm happy with it. Okay, how did
you choose Lennox and Sebastian. So Lennox I looked at
like a literature baby name book. One night in the
middle of the night when I couldn't sleep, I was like, oh,
I love Lennox. It's like a Shakespearean play. I think
(01:48):
it's King Lear and his middle name is Page after
Jimmy Page. Sebastian's name is a lot more fun. I
wanted to name him something else, and my husband's like, no,
we have to name a Sebastian. What did you want
to name like West or something. I don't know. There's
a kin Lennox's class names now, so it would be weird. Yeah,
so with your names, um, Emma, I love the book
(02:08):
by Jane Austen, so that was a no brainer. Now, Wyatt,
we didn't know the gender with either one of you,
so if why it had been a girl, he would
have been Willa, which I still wish I had another
girl to name Will. I love that name. He broke
the mold with me, Mom, true that with why we
were all set on the name Winston until like thirty
seven weeks when Eric just all of a sudden realized
(02:34):
the baby's names should be Wyatt. He's a big fan
of Western so that made sense. He's not a Winston,
he's so a Wyatt. So how far into your pregnancy
were you when you knew the gender? So that gave
you a head start. Um, I don't pretty like immediately
like he was like, okay, it's Sebastian. Okay, um, and
then Lennox I think halfway through. Okay. So baby names
(02:57):
here in the US, of course, anything seem to go um,
and not just when it comes to celebrity baby names anymore.
People get super creative, and for the most part in
the US, you can by law and name your baby
anything you want to. I mean, there are some states
that limit the total number of letters if you add
(03:18):
up the first, middle, and last name, so it can
all fit on a legal form um. But those letters
can spell just about anything. No number. Elon Musk learned
about the hard way. No numbers, yes, but in other
parts of the world apparently not so much. I did
not know this until I was digging a little bit.
But baby names are actually restricted by law in some countries,
(03:40):
and that's including countries like Denmark, Norway, Sweden, Germany, New Zealand.
For instance, in many countries, you can't name your baby
something that could be potentially embarrassing or have them made
fun of or negatively impact a child's well being. Some
obvious example balls would be Satan Hitler Anus. Yeah, you
(04:05):
can't name your baby anus. Governments have also rejected names
that are even more random, like sexy fruit I'm still
stuck on anus um. Also, unconventional spellings of traditional names
are discouraged now. Some countries like Norway and Sweden, require
that a first name sounds like a first name. Anderson.
(04:25):
You can't name your baby Anderson, So sorry about that,
Anderson cooper um. Some countries banned brand names, and that
would include some names that are pretty popular here like Chanel,
Mercedes and in Sweden you can't name your kid I Kea.
I'm okay with that. Some countries don't allow names that
aren't gender specific, like the name has to tell you
(04:48):
right away whether it's a boy or girl, So a
lot of favorite names here would be out, like Charlie.
I love that super cute Charlie, so cute for a girl,
but apparently it's not legal in Germany and Iceland. There
are also plenty of baby name traditions from around the
world that date way back. In some parts of Africa,
I thought this was so sweet. An elder in the
(05:11):
village picks the name and whispers it into the baby's
ear before they announced it at the baby naming ceremony,
because the belief is that the baby should hear his
or her name, especially beautiful thing I've ever heard. You know,
Let's take a quick break and when we come back,
we're going over our community's biggest questions about baby names. So, Emma,
(05:50):
let's read through some of these messages from what to Expect.
So we looked at some of the posts about baby
names on the what to Expect community message boards, and
there's a lot of them. We pulled out some of
the topics of conversation you all have. Um Emma, let's
read through some of these and discuss on the other side.
What are the most popular ways people come up with names,
(06:14):
I mean, besides just liking how it sounds for the moment.
I actually signed thousands of books a year, and I
have heard just about every baby name out there. Oh yeah,
I bet I've heard it all. I've spelled it all.
And there are a lot of families, you know. I
sign a lot of books from military families, and a
(06:35):
lot of those families the tradition is you give your
baby dad's name. Um, so it's a lot of junior seconds,
thirds force five. I've had six. I think I'm not
sure I went any higher than that that would be impressed.
Some families actually just used the same name for the
father and son, so for instance, Marcus and Marcus, not
Marcus senior and Marcus juior, Marcus Marcus. Some do diminutives,
(07:00):
like Jonathan and Johnny. Um, wasn't it George Foreman who
named all his sons George. I looked it up and
he gave each one a number two, So George one
George too. It's a little confusing maybe, but I guess
you don't get the names mixed up. That's a plus. Um,
some people do. I think this is so cute. Some
people do. See jays for you know, Christopher John or
(07:23):
John um ore J's t js and I feel like
those are names that you know, sure their nicknames, but
their nicknames that you can grow with. Biblical names are
always popular. Some people choose them because they're religious. Some
people just choose them because their traditional names. Some families
(07:44):
keep the biblical theme going for all their kids. So
you've got Samuel, Noah, Isaac. Isaiah is one that I
always forget how to spell Ezekiel, or let's say Mohammed, Aliyah,
Hannah esther all. This ancestry dot com has brought back
a lot of ancestral names. Now. Some parents named baby
(08:08):
after where they were conceived. So, Emma, you would have
been Greenwich Village. I know a mom on Instagram said
Hayden Park after the neighborhood where her baby was conceived.
That's really pretty. Yeah, it's really pretty. It's like Beyonce's
line Ivy Park. I'm not mad. A lot of military
families were always moving around from base to base. Sometimes
(08:30):
they choose the name from the place that they're based
when the baby's conceived, so like Hawaiian name and Italian name,
a Japanese name. I had a mom who didn't know
the baby's gender yet when I signed her book, so
I signed it to both the boy and girl named.
The boy name was going to be Ben after Big Ben,
not Benjamin Benn and the girl name was going to
(08:51):
be Abbey, after Westminster Abbey. That cute. Um celebrity names.
One mom told me Reese Witherspoon. She named her baby Reese.
I think there's been a run on Chase. I'm not
sure if that was from Chase Crawford or whether it's
from Pap Patrol if they have a younger kid, maybe
(09:13):
Pap Patrol. When I was in high school, that name
was pretty popular to Chase. I like that name. It's
a good, sturdy name. I think it's coming back, making
a comeback. Sophia is like super popular. I think it's
like at the top of the list right now. But
it's not from Sophia Lorenne. That's what somebody a few
people told me on Instagram. It was after Sophia Lorene. H.
I finm sure names like Blake for Blake Lively. Also,
(09:37):
I'm sure a lot of character names. Yeah, I've heard
a lot of movie characters. So Aurelia from Love actually
is one that I've heard several times. One of my
favorite all time movies. Oh yeah, that's a big one.
Disney characters, UM names from music, characters and books. UM.
Somebody mentioned characters from Game of Thrones. I've never seen it. Aria,
(10:01):
I haven't seen I saw like one season, but that's
a big one. Okay, Eighties TV and movie characters, especially
for moms of a certain generation. I have no idea
any of those constellations, stars, planets, mercury. I hear a
lot of Greek gods. I get Adonis, Apollo, Ena, Venus, whoa, Yeah,
(10:25):
I've seen a lot of newborn adonis Is. That's adorable.
Donnie Presidents Kennedy. Oh yeah, that's great for I know
a girl Kennedy. Also, you can use that for both genders. Yep, Theodore,
I love that. Teddy Rosevel Well, I love Teddy so
that I know a teddy girl. And President's kids like Malia.
(10:47):
That's a great one from President Obama. Sports figures Nolan
after Nolan Ryan. There's also a naming tradition, a Jewish
naming tradition, where you name your baby after a relative ooside,
but you don't necessarily have to use that particular name,
but the name should start with the same letter. There's
also names that come from tragedies, like this year, there
(11:09):
have been a lot of Koby's and Gianna's. I also
wonder if Ruth is going to make it come back.
Maybe Ruth Bader. That's the cutest little girl name ever, Ruth,
are you kidding? Best legacy ever? Old school names. So
I love when babies are named like old people, because
(11:29):
don't they look like little men anyway? A lot of
the time they do. It's literally like Benjamin Button. The
name kind of fits. So Grandpa names like Daddy is
or Eugene. That's the best time ever. Parents Bernard, will
my heart be Stanley? And then this grandma names like Irene, Mabel, Harriet, Edith, Dorothy,
(11:55):
eleanor has made a huge comeback, Florence. You can call
it baby flow yeah, except anything about the progressive I know.
I was thinking that at the same time. Everyone it
for me, but God or your aunt flow right, Please
somebody naming your baby Wilber I know, and or Clarence
and then d m me and show me a picture
(12:15):
of them, or Mabel or d m me too. Um.
And then when people go by the meaning of the name,
some people don't care. We didn't care, but somehow your
name's actually fit the meaning. So Emma comes from all embracing,
which I did not know until I looked it up.
But all embracing. That's totally you. That's me Why it
(12:37):
means strong, brave, and hearty, which is like incredible because
his preschool teacher when he was to described him as stoic.
I really don't know many two year olds who are
described as stoic, but that's why he's definitely stoic, completely
someone you've met. Sometimes parents will name their kids after
(12:58):
someone they've met once they really like the name, or
someone you know, you babysat for now. Popularity is a
funny thing. No one named their kids Emma or Wyatt.
When we did, we thought we were picking names that
would never become popular, and go figure, they're super super popular.
So there's really no guarantee that when you pick your
(13:20):
name that is going to remain uncommon. Um. Some people
like to avoid super popular names. Others embrace trends. They
hear a name, they hear it a lot, they like it,
they use it, it doesn't matter if it's about to
break the top ten. Others look for names that are
not too popular, not too uncommon, you know, just right.
(13:41):
It's it's a very important choice. I need to tell
you one funny story. One mom told me that her husband,
when he was in high school. He had Bob Marley
come to him in a dream. Really yeah, and he
promised for some reason, he promised Bob Marley and his
dream to name his firstborn son after him. And so
(14:06):
you know, she met him. They got married, not her
and Bob Marley, her and her husband. And he said, well,
by the way, our son has to be named after
Bob Marley. And she didn't like the name Bob. She
didn't like the name Robert, so they named their baby Morley.
Their firstborn son was Morley, and then they wanted to
keep the music theme, so they named the second one
Morrison and call may. So it's so cute, Maury, that's
(14:29):
so great. Have you ever heard of people inventing their
own name. I feel like that's really popular. Yeah, that's
very popular, and you can definitely do that, um, at
least if you live in the US. Some people blend
two names together. Sometimes they change a letter, like instead
of Olivia, it's Olivia with an A, or Arissa instead
(14:49):
of Alissa or Marissa. But I feel like changing names
is great because that's solidified that you won't have a
name that's like super popular. Even if the name was popular,
the spelling is different, so of like keeps you in
that unique little bubble. Yeah, some people do Brianna instead
of Brianna. You can take Oakley and make it Oaklynn.
I've heard that a lot. But then your kid gets
(15:12):
to the gas station or the souvenir shop and there
are no key chains or cups. There's never a key
chain for either of my kids. No, And it's funny.
There were no Emma's back when you were growing up.
There were no Wyatts. Maybe there are now now we're
lousy with Emma's now they probably are. But actually, you know,
that could be a blessing, one mom pointed out, because
then you don't have to buy all those collectibles. True,
(15:34):
there are a lot of tricky spellings too, and sometimes
they're on purpose, sometimes not. There must be seventeen ways
to spell Riley and Kayla and Kylie and Mackenzie. I
mean even Sarah has to well, actually three ways. I
know Sarah who spelled s e r A. I met
(15:54):
a mom whose father misspelled her name on her birth certificate.
I wish I could remember for the name. It was
something super it was super simple, and he didn't know
how to spell it, so he put the wrong spelling
down and she had to live with it. But you know,
of course now it's a great story, that's amazing. And
then of course there's misspelling on purpose creative spelling. My
(16:17):
sister's name is Sandy with two ease, and that said
my name is Heidi, but nobody can spell it. Really,
there's no tricks. It's just nobody can spell Heidi. Well,
sometimes people spell my name with one M. It's rare,
but it happens. So what about thinking whether the name
has a nickname? Like some just naturally do some don't.
(16:41):
I remember when you named Lennox, we were thinking, oh,
that means we're going to call him Len, and he
is such a Len. We call him Len all the time.
It's so cute. With Seby, I don't even call him no,
I don't ever call him Sebastian. I think that, you know,
you really you need to sit there and like trying
(17:01):
to think of all the nicknames that your kid could
possibly have, because school, school can be rough. What happens
if you and your partner do not agree on the
name that I feel like the finals say should be
going to the person who pushes that child out, that's true,
or gives birth to it. Somehow did the heavy listing parents?
(17:24):
You know, sometimes they had a mom who told me
she and her husband talked about it on their first
date and apparently they agreed on the name so they
could move to the next step. That's a very important
first stake conversation. I know some parents have kept a
list since high school. I have, and you didn't use
(17:44):
any of them like that. No, I've been in the
awkward position of signing books. You know, the mom's there
and she doesn't like the name the dad wants, and
the dad doesn't like the name she wants, and so
they asked me to sign the name that they like.
And I feel that's a lot of pressure, A little
awkward about that, but still some people take it so
(18:07):
seriously they actually do bracket a limit. My husband, you know,
I let him have it because it was his first
and it was my second. So I was like, you
know what you do you okay, if you decide on
a name during pregnancy, should you tell your friends and family?
I feel like I did not tell. The majority of
(18:30):
my family told us. I mean my extended family. I
told a few people, but I kept it on the dal.
A lot of horror stories I've read on what to
Expect message boards of moms sharing names and people making
negative comments, which is I've seen that that's so mean. Yeah,
you can think it, but don't say it, or write it,
(18:53):
write it in a on a piece of paper and
just throw it in the trash. Should they never seen you?
Don't say it out loud. Now. A lot of moms
told me they actually like to share the name so
that they get personalized gifts for their babies. But I
did have one mom who did a gender reveal with
the name. Everything was picked out a whole nine yards,
picked out the registry based on the gender only, and
(19:15):
turned out when the baby was born he was a
she and they had to redo everything. I mean, it
doesn't happen often that those mistakes were me, but it
does happen for me that I feel a little guilty
about it, because what about the peanut gallery, Like, what
should you do if there's pressure from a family member
to name the baby after a relative or to use
(19:36):
a letter in honor of someone and you don't want to.
I really don't know why people think they get a
vote on someone else's baby. I mean, even if it's
their grandchild. They just don't get a vote. I mean,
opinions from the Peanut Gallery about your Peanuts name should
not matter. The problem is that they actually can hurt,
(19:59):
and they can hurt a lot. I mean, this is
how I look at it. You made this baby together,
you raise the baby together, you pay babies bills together,
You get to name the baby together without outside interference.
You are the only ones who should have a vote.
I mean that doesn't stop mothers and mother in laws,
(20:21):
fathers and father in laws from giving their two cents
and even saying, you know, I've heard some incredibly hurtful
things that family members have said, laying on the guilt
when they don't like your choice. That's not fair, or
getting all passive aggressive about it, or pressure and you
(20:41):
even some family members pressure parents to change the name.
It's so messed up. Emma, one of the moms on
your Instagram said she listened to the Peanut Gallery, actually
changed her baby's name based on the Peanut Gallery and
still has name recrap. I mean, I think that's so
beyond unfair and messed up. You should name your child
(21:03):
what you want to name your child, not what your
mother in law wants you to name your child. She
got to pick her son's name, she should let you
and your husband pick your name. And also, I don't
think it's fair that if you have decided on a name,
for anybody to have any sort of voice in that.
You know, if you're kind of throwing names out there,
it's okay to say, I mean it's not my favorite,
but I like this one more. That's fine, But you
(21:25):
don't need when that name is solid, you know what,
just let it go. You know what happened with your
middle name? My mother hated it and we ended up
because I felt so super guilty and I was so hormonal.
We added another name to your your official name, just
to a piece er, and we totally regretted it and
we never used it. She didn't like my first name either.
(21:46):
Did she know she didn't like any of it? Yes?
So the only two people who should be able to
change baby's name, in my opinion, are the parents. I say,
tell them to butt out nicely, firmly or not nicely,
if that's what it takes. The hormones talking. I'm pregnant.
(22:18):
Can we really wait to decide on name until the
baby is born? Is it true that you just know
when you see them or know that like that's not
the right name. Three months ago you see your kids like,
oh that is not a Freend, that is a Henry.
You know, it sounds like a movie cliche, but in
fact a surprising number of parents say this. Um, there's
(22:42):
still the minority by far like need to know ahead
of time, but sometimes, you know, kind of use that
birth moment to solidify how they feel about a name,
to confirm that it fits. Um. Most parents have at
least one name picked out already. Some actually do. I've
heard several cass of parents changing the baby's name because
(23:02):
it didn't fit once they held their baby. Usually they're
not starting from scratch. Um, they've got a list of contenders.
One thing that's actually I remember giving birth, you were like,
come on, Sebastian's coming. Like it gave me that push
that I was about to meet a person with a
name rather than just a baby. I don't know for me,
that was kind of helpful during delivery. Any other tips
(23:24):
or things that you know we really should be aware of.
There's an article and was respect dot com with women
saying what they wish they've known before they picked their
baby names. Some of the biggest takeaways pay attention to
the initials. Babies with TRD, for instance, as initials. That
sounds like turd, Alyssa Samantha Smiths. That makes an ass
(23:45):
out of you and me. Amy Schumer remember changed her
baby's name after realizing the gene ATel sounded like genital.
I'm not mad at that, though, I mean Lennox is
lp A little People's Association of America and SETTI is
s s A, which is Social Security Administration. Oh, you're right,
(24:06):
that's cute. One mom suggests that don't waste the middle name.
You might need it one day if you have another
baby of the same gender. Also important, say it out loud. Surprisingly,
some parents never end up saying the baby's name out
wowd they write it down. You know. Something else to
remember is that you can change your mind. You can
change your mind right up until you signed the birth
(24:28):
certificate and leave the hospital. Sure, a lot of people
do that, by the way, like a lot of people,
A lot of people do. I know a pair of
parents that debated for two days and finally settled before
they were discharged, and another mom on what to expect,
regretted not knowing this because she ended up with a
name like that she was coming up with under pressure.
(24:50):
She didn't really like it, but she felt pressured by
the nurses to sign the papers, and so she settled
on it. I'm sure she loves the baby, of course.
Here's my biggest takeaway my baby name. Bottom line, it's
your decision. It's a lot of pressure anyway to pick
out a name for life, so you have to make
sure you pick one without added pressure from anyone else.
(25:13):
Take your time, be open to change in your mind
when you meet your baby, and don't let anyone tell
you what to do. It's up to you and your partner.
I have to share one thing that a mom said
that was just so incredibly sweet. She said, whatever name
you choose, make sure you feel love, enjoy when you
say it. And for me, that says at all. Once
(25:37):
everyone holds that sweet baby of yours, the name will
be just as sweet. Baby love, my baby love. I
need you, Oh how I need you. Thanks for listening.
Remember I'm always here for you. What to Expect is
(25:59):
always here for you. We are all in this together.
For more on what you heard on today's episode, visit
what to Expect dot com slash podcast. You can also
check out What to Expect when You're Expecting, What to
Expect the First Year, and the What to Expect app.
And we want to hear from you. Connect with us
on our community message board or on our social media.
(26:22):
You can find me at Heidi Murkoff and Emma at
Emma Being w t E and of course at What
to Expect. Baby Love is performed by Riley Beater. What
to Expect is a production of I Heart Radio. From
more shows from I Heart Radio, check out the i
heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to
(26:45):
your favorite shows in my Arms, what on, Just Stain, Nija, Nija,
Baby Baby four
Popular Podcasts
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com