March 24, 2021 • 23 mins
Every expectant parent goes through the process of finding a pediatrician for their baby. But when and where do you start? What questions should you ask? This week, Heidi is joined by board certified pediatrician, Dr. Lauren Crosby, to talk through how to find the baby doctor that’s right for you and your baby.
Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Who baby a baby belof I need you, Oh hell,
I need you. What to Expect is a production of
I Heart Radio. I'm your host Heidi Murkop and I'm
a mom on a mission, a mission to help you
(00:20):
know what to expect every step of the way. Getting
ready to welcome your baby bundle, then get ready to
start shopping not only for that crip, that car seat,
and all those impossibly tiny and precious outfits, but also
shopping for a pediatrician. The right pediatriction can see you
(00:43):
and your little one and later you're not so little
one through eighteen years or so of checkups and unizations,
runny noses and fevers, tummy bugs and boo boos of
all varieties. Help you troubleshoot feeding problems, navigate napstraight, resolve rashes,
document your baby's amazing growth and development. So today we
(01:06):
are talking about how to find the baby doctor that's
right for you and your baby. And joining me today
is Dr Lauren Crosby, a board certified pediatrician here in
Los Angeles and my personal go to for all things baby,
not to mention full disclosure, pediatrician to two of my
favorite babies, Lenox and Sebastian. Welcome. Dr Crosby. Hi, hi ki,
(01:30):
thanks for having me. First of all, we have talked
a lot on what to expect about pregnancy and parenting
during a pandemic, and there's a lot to talk about.
But how has the pandemic changed the way that pediatricians practice.
That's a good question. So in a couple of ways.
One is the way our office runs is different. You know,
(01:51):
you're not going to have like tons of little kids
running around the hallways anymore, and just the stroller parking
lot that we're trying to have it not crowded. This
is are doing video visits or i tele medicine visits
or what they call it telehealth, where certain things can
be done that way where you don't even have to
leave your home and we can set up times with
people where we can look at certain things that way.
(02:11):
Like I've had very successful office visits for things like
beastings or allergic reaction type rashes that they thought were
that or you know, like ezema or rewards, or you know,
discussing medication changes. The next best thing to be in there, right, Okay,
let's say you're expecting your first baby and you don't
have the slightest clue on how to find the pediatrician
(02:35):
that you know you're going to need. Stat When is
the best time to start looking for a pediatrician? Really,
anytime during pregnancy, except for not maybe the last few weeks,
and even maybe before like thirty five, thirty six weeks,
like given at least a month or marek because you
don't know how long it's going to take, or maybe
you want to interview a bunch of people and you
(02:56):
want to have plenty of time, and it has to
match your schedules. Sometimes we play a lot of phone
to bag. So I think early is always good, definitely,
essentially because there's always a slim possibility your baby might
come early surprise you. So you want to be all set.
How do you start? What are the first things to consider?
And I would imagine the first first first thing is
(03:16):
deciding if you're going to use a pediatrician or family physician,
you know, I think that that decision depends on the
family physicians experience. You know, pediatricians are specifically trained and
only trained in the health, development and illnesses in children,
and that's very specific. So there are lots of things
(03:38):
that we scream for you know. Now I've done this
for twenty years. You know I can eyeball stuff and
be like that's okay, that's not okay, you know, things
like that. So some family physicians deal a lot more
with older kids or maybe more adults. So it depends
on how much of their practice is really real true
general pediatrics. I think that matters um And then to
(03:59):
actually find a pediatrician, you do want someone who is
board certified. It will say after their name, after the
M D or the d O, it will say f
A a P. So that's Fellow of American Academy Pediatrics,
which means they're board certified. Now some people don't put
those initials after their name, but you can always call
their office and make sure their board certified or look
them up even online. Often it's the will be a
(04:20):
lot of times it makes the initial recommendation or will
give a list of people. Call these offices, talk to
these people. Yeah, that's how Emma found you. In fact,
was her be recommended you? And you can also ask
friends or coworkers. Definitely very helpful because you may have friends.
They know you, they know your style, they know that
you're either a worried about certain things, or you're not
(04:41):
and they may be able to go this is a
good fit for you. Yeah, and I wouldn't necessarily go
by online reviews as much as those no, because sometimes,
like even like for our yell page, they'll put a
one star because the person was mad, because our office
doesn't take people who don't vaccinate. So you given you
went on yelp and give us a one start, gotcha? Yeah,
so you know what I mean. It's extremes. It's either
(05:02):
super happy or like super mad. So clearly some parents
are going to have more of a choice than others
because of insurance coverage or because of their location if
they're in a rural area where there are a few choices.
But if you have the choice, would you suggest um
having an interview, consult with a potential candidate, or would
(05:22):
you even suggest two or three? Yes, I think it's
good to kind of get a list of people and
maybe narrow it down. You could narrow it down by
how many other friends you know that go there and
I'm happy with them, or how far is the schleft
to the office, you know, especially in a city like
l A where it could take you like an hour
(05:42):
to not even go that far, so traffic, office location
and hours and all of those things do matter, and
then it is good to do a visit. We used
to bring pregnant women into the office and we would
sit down and meet with them. Now we're not, so
we're doing it either virtually on a video and visit
or via phone call too. And I feel like you
might miss a lot in a phone call if you're
(06:04):
not you know, making eye contact, at least for me,
I feel like a video call would be, if possible,
would be prefercent. That's what we do. Yes, and even
if you've made your decision without a console, do you
think it's important to have one call or video visit
before the delivery so that you're all kind of all
(06:24):
set about what's going to happen, what you can expect. Typically,
what I always did when I did those was I
also would talk about what's what's going to happen at
the hospital even during that. So I usually say so
once the baby's out, they call our office right away,
and then we come see the baby, and we kind
of give them that, but they should call if they
still have more questions. For sure, you make it sound
(06:45):
so easy once the baby's out just you know, just
like that. Let's let's dig into some of the topics
you'll want to cover with a potential pediatrisian. I imagine
some of these you could just go over with the
office off when you make your call for the appointment.
Hospital affiliation does that matter? I mean, we like to
(07:06):
see our newborns right when they come out, like we
enjoy going in the morning and seeing the new babies.
But it doesn't always work out. Sometimes their insurance doesn't
cover the hospital that were so at least if you
know we'll see them within usually forty eight hours after
going home, then that's also good because they do have
people who will cover and sometimes the OBI who delivers
(07:27):
that the hospital has a pediatrician they work with really well,
and we'll recommend to see your baby until you come
to our office. Do you think there are benefits to
going into there's probably fewer than ever. But solo practice
as opposed to group practice or a practice that combines
a nurse practitioner or physicians assistant. Some it depends on style,
Like I know there's parents, Like we have five doctors
(07:50):
right now in our practice, UM and so we have
a busy practice and a busy office. Not prouding anymore
though at least, but we do really have a good
number of patients that we see. So for us, if
you want an appointment at a certain time, like for
the check up, make it on your way out, because
an office that is on the busier side, their availability
(08:10):
maybe a little bit tighter um to get you in
at a time that you want, whereas a smaller office
maybe with one or two doctors, depending how busy they are.
You can find out those kind of things like how
long is the way time to get an appointment, same
day appointments, all of those things, and then you know
if you have qualified nurse practitioner. You know, typically pediatric
(08:31):
nurse practitioners are quite good, intend to know their limitations,
and they are also supervised by a physician as well.
It does depend on what's available in your area. I
will say. One other thing is that in our practice
I have found it's nice to have several doctors there
at one time. There's always like two or three of
us because also we'll talk to each other, run things
(08:51):
by each other, or I'll say, look, I'm not going
to be here tomorrow, but when you come back, I
want you to see doctor so and so. So I'm
gonna bring her in so you can meet her. And
now way tomorrow you come back for us to look
at the wound or the cut or listen to the lungs.
You'll know who it is and she'll be able to
know what's going on. But there's definitely a benefit to
seeing generally this same pediatation for every world baby check
(09:14):
up as possible. Yes, and you do want to know
who's covering you know if that doctor, especially in a solo,
practices on vacation because us we always have multiple ones
of us around. You're not allowed to have vacation, right,
be off, it's not like we're going anywhere, No exactly,
say cation. Um. So the phone calls when parents have questions,
(09:36):
should you ask how those are handled? Typically? Are there
call in times or is it a free for all
and you wait for a callback. Some doctors do have
call in ours where people can just call UM. A
lot of them take a message and the return the
calls like we return the calls usually between twelve fifteen
and one fifteen and then after five of it's a
specific call where they need us. But we do have
(09:58):
trained nurses who do phone calls and often are the
first ones on the phone triage because a lot of
times they can tell you, you know what, you need
to just come in. I'm going to give you an appointment,
or that is totally fine, and that is going around,
and if that fever is still there by tomorrow, we'll
just call in the morning. We'll get you in. They know.
I get messages, like yesterday, I got a few. The
nurse put them right in my box. She said, this
(10:18):
one you need to call, or this one really would
prefer to just talk to you, and that's fine, and
we just call them mat and protocol for emergencies. And
I think it's kind of like a Murphy's law of
sick kids. But it's always like Saturday night at three am.
Did you ask about that as well. Yeah. It's also
like who's covering and who handles the after hours calls.
(10:39):
So some people have on call centers that take over
and then only reach out to the actual doctor if
it's something that the on call nurse system doesn't handle. Um,
whether it's through the medical center they're affiliated with or
a company they hire for us, it's one of the
five doctors which take turns each night on call and
so after hours, it's our same phone number and it
(10:59):
gives two options. If it's the emergency, you press this
and leave a message and we get paged right away,
versus I have a question that I need to know tonight,
but I don't have no right to second. Then we
call back in about one and after two hours. On
those I'm sure you have the parents who think everything
is an emergency. We do. That's okay, we know, and
you know all those basics are super important, you know,
(11:20):
and you can ask about how billing has done all that,
all those logistics, But I think even more important than
that is making sure that pediatrician is on the same
page as you when it comes to certain philosophies and
points of view immunizations. I know that's a non negotiable
(11:48):
in your office, like every parent needs to accept immunizations
for their their baby. What would you say to a
prospective parent who comes in and says, I am really
nervous about this whole vaccination thing. I heard this or that.
As you know, it's also become like a huge topic.
(12:08):
So I do like to give them perspective because what's
happened now is because these parents are not seeing polio
every day, and they're not seeing measles, and they're not
seeing newmaccocklemaningitis and hidmeningitis with children with hearing loss and
brain damage, and you're not seeing it because of these
fabulous vaccines. That you need to realize that these diseases
(12:29):
come back when we stop vaccinating. People travel all over
the world. There are countries that don't have access to
the vaccines, and we are lucky that we have them.
So I do go through my years of experience what
I have seen, how all of us have kids. We've
all vaccinated our kids with everything. They're all totally fine
and healthy, and we just really want them to know
(12:49):
that it's benefits benefits benefits much outweigh the risk exactly,
and everyone around your baby should be up to date
on other refinings. Absolutely true breastfeeding. You're not gonna find
pediatricians who are not pro breastfeeding. Of course they're pro breastfeeding,
but should you ask about how much hands on guidance
(13:10):
you will be able to receive in the office, for instance,
are their knowledgeable nurses or even a certified lactation consultant
on staff. Because breastfeeding is the natural process that doesn't
always come naturally, so it depends how much trouble people
are having. And I have found that the nurses at
the huspital I'm affiliated with have just become better and
(13:32):
better and better, and they have great lactation consultants. So
we really like to make sure before we actually they
walk out of the hospital that they really at least
have seen someone who really can get them to latch,
and that they feel at least like they can latch
that baby before they get home. Now, sometimes it goes
off the rails once you're home, right the hospital, everything
seems to be fine, and you get home and you
can't latch her baby, and all bets off when the
(13:54):
mail comes in right right, yes, exactly, and then you're
dealing with all of those things. So um, when they
come in a day or two her and we check
in and we see how they're going, if they are
having a lot of problems, I will make a bunch
of suggestions like let's try this position, let's do this,
let's try this, maybe pump a few minutes just to
pull the nipple out and then stop and put the
baby on, and we give them lots of things they
(14:14):
can try There are some lactation consultants that we work
closely with and they always give them their card. Nowadays,
they do a lot of virtual visits, but there are
those cases where they might need like up close hands
on just to get the baby on and then they
back away and have their masks on and stand back,
and that's very short and probably low risk, and they're
very careful. On the flip side, say mom is planning
(14:36):
to for whatever reason, formula feed, should she mention that
just to get sort of a gauge of whether she
might be judged for that decision. Definitely should. I mean,
hopefully they're not being judged for that. We understand there
are certain personal decisions. For some people. That's a very
personal decision. Some can't rest feed because they have medical
(14:57):
reasons or they're on medications, or they've had surgeries on
their breast that it's not gonna work, and they know
that and it's fine, you know, and we definitely help
them through it. And some women just really don't like
the idea, or they're going back to work in two weeks,
so there's a lot of reasons. So no judge. So
you want to find a pediatrician who is supportive of
(15:18):
whatever you decide to do ultimately, whether it's breastfeed for sure,
time a long time now, nutrition and supplements, Right, if
you have strong feelings about that, is that something you
should talk to the pediatrician about for sure, because there
are a lot of them, and you're gonna hear a
lot of things, and there are only certain ones that
(15:38):
really we feel are safe to use wild breastfeeding, because
there's no studies on the impact of any of these
on newborn babies, So there's a lot we don't know,
And you certainly don't want to risk anything any kind
of danger of toxic the allergic reaction, anything like that.
So you definitely don't want to take something without checking
with your doctor completely. And I think it's just probably
(15:59):
good to get all of these issues on the table.
You don't want a parent to hold back about anything. No, definitely, definitely. Okay,
So you've covered the nuts and bolts of what is
important to look for in a pediatrician, But then there
are some intangibles, right, don't you think for Emma it
was so important to have a doctor who wasn't an
alarmist um and so her non alarmists obstetrician referred her
(16:25):
to you a non alarmists pediatrician who just as importantly
was able to take her concerns seriously while also offering reassurance.
For me, it was all about empathy and a sense
of humor. I feel like a sense of humor takes
parents far and pediatricians far in the relationship listening. I
(16:47):
was just gonna say, it's exactly like my my little
list is like, a sense of humor definitely helps. Listening
skills are super important, and also being able to give
the parent perspective too. You know, it's super important to
go look and even sometimes from my own experience with
my son's I'll even go, look, Luke broke his arm
(17:08):
in multiple places and we had to have surgery and
they had to put a ran or whatever, and we
got through it. And I've been there and this is
gonna be fine, and this is what we're gonna do,
or whatever it was. I'm able to reassure that it's
it's gonna get better, it's gonna go wait. I promise you.
You know, so, is that actually something you should put
on your checklist like that? The pediatrician is also a
(17:29):
mom or a dad You know, it's interesting because I
have friends who practice in one runs a clinic in
York and he doesn't have kids. H he's you know, fabulous,
you know, brilliant and fabulous, so like you can't. It's
funny you think that, oh, well they have to have children,
but not necessarily so interesting. But I think the perspective
is often really helpful because you've been in the trenches
(17:52):
and world perspective, like, remember, there's this many millions of
kids who have done this or been through this or
whatever and they're fine now. So yeah, what about exam
table manner? Like that's going to be super hard to judge,
you know, until your your baby is on the table.
(18:13):
So what would you look for? You know, it is
hard to tell. But I think when you do do
the interview, like you said, if you can get a
video one that at least it's helpful. I mean, I
like to talk to the babies. That's how I can
do my part of my developmental assessment is I just
let them stare at me and see what happens, you know,
and and the back and forth with the baby and
(18:33):
I dangle my step and so I kind of spend
time with them. So I can see if they're reaching
and grabbing, if they're trying to roll for things, and
and just staring at the baby is important to let
them look at your face. And I watched them, and
I watched their eye contact and the social skills. So
and you know what, as you and I know what
is better for a baby's social and language development than
people talking to them eye contact, singing, talking, narrating your day. Right,
(18:58):
So I also believe in mom gut and I feel
it's important for doctors to respect it. Remember when Emma
had lenox with the local site was infected and she
had the mom got something wasn't right, and she persevered
and sure enough he ended up very rare case, but
ended up, you know, with a staff infection. So what
(19:22):
are your feelings on mom cut. Obviously it's not gonna
be a but right. I think that it's very different
with first baby Mama and third baby momat too. But
we know that and that's fine, but we always want
to address it whatever the concern is. You know, at
least take it seriously and say, you know what, I
see why you're saying that, or you feel this way.
(19:42):
But here's X, Y and Z to explain why this
is okay, or you know what, you're absolutely right, let's
do this like you're right, I think the formula isn't
agreeing with the baby, and let's take the poop for
blood or you know, so you at least do something
to address it, and sometimes just to alleviate those worries
and concerns. And most of the time the baby is fine,
(20:04):
vast majority of time, but when in doubt, check it out.
It's just better. Now, it's better. And that actually brings
me to my final point. The way I see it,
the relationship with your pediatrician, just like your obie or
your midwife, should be a partnership. So you as parents
will contribute what you know best, and that's your baby.
And first time parents out there all saying, what do
(20:25):
you mean, I don't know anything about my baby, But
in fact, you see your baby every day, every night,
and so you will get to know your baby, and
you will know your baby best. And then the pediatrician
contributes to that partnership what he or she knows best,
and that's all the medical expertise and experience, and then
you put that together and and it's a beautiful thing.
(20:47):
But what's your best advice for building a good relationship
with the pediatrician that you do choose. I think listening
on both sides is good, you know, I think that's important.
I think that make ensure that you do ask your
questions and that they are willing to answer them so
that you don't feel brushed off or rushed is good.
(21:09):
And also, you know, on the on the parents side,
you know, making sure that you know you show up
on time for your appointments and that you kind of
follow a lot of the stuff that we suggest that
will actually help you. And if you disagree, I want
to know, you know, I'll be if or if you
tried it and it didn't work, fine, let's talk about
(21:31):
it and make clean b So communication that's the key
to any good relationship, including the relationship between parents and pediatrician.
And you will spend almost as much time with your
pediatrician as you will with your partner, so you want
to make this relationship work. So I want to thank
you Dr Crosby for joining us and walking us through
(21:52):
how to find the best pediatrician. Thank you, thanks for
having me say love my baby love. I need you,
Oh how I need you. Thanks for listening remember, I'm
always here for you. What to Expect is always here
(22:13):
for you. We're all in this together. For more on
what you heard on today's episode, visit what to Expect
dot com slash podcast. You can also check out What
to Expect when You're Expecting, What to Expect the First Year,
and the What to Expect app. And we want to
hear from you. Connect with us on our community message
(22:33):
board or on our social media. You can find me
at Heidie Murkoff and Emma at Emma Being w t
E and of course at What to Expect. Baby Love
is performed by Riley Biterer. What to Expect is a
production of I Heart Radio. From more shows from I
Heart Radio check out the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
(22:57):
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. In my
Arms right, don't You Stay? Knija Kneeda, Baby Love, Baby
Low
Who baby a baby belof I need you, Oh hell,
I need you. What to Expect is a production of
I Heart Radio. I'm your host Heidi Murkop and I'm
a mom on a mission, a mission to help you
(00:20):
know what to expect every step of the way. Getting
ready to welcome your baby bundle, then get ready to
start shopping not only for that crip, that car seat,
and all those impossibly tiny and precious outfits, but also
shopping for a pediatrician. The right pediatriction can see you
(00:43):
and your little one and later you're not so little
one through eighteen years or so of checkups and unizations,
runny noses and fevers, tummy bugs and boo boos of
all varieties. Help you troubleshoot feeding problems, navigate napstraight, resolve rashes,
document your baby's amazing growth and development. So today we
(01:06):
are talking about how to find the baby doctor that's
right for you and your baby. And joining me today
is Dr Lauren Crosby, a board certified pediatrician here in
Los Angeles and my personal go to for all things baby,
not to mention full disclosure, pediatrician to two of my
favorite babies, Lenox and Sebastian. Welcome. Dr Crosby. Hi, hi ki,
(01:30):
thanks for having me. First of all, we have talked
a lot on what to expect about pregnancy and parenting
during a pandemic, and there's a lot to talk about.
But how has the pandemic changed the way that pediatricians practice.
That's a good question. So in a couple of ways.
One is the way our office runs is different. You know,
(01:51):
you're not going to have like tons of little kids
running around the hallways anymore, and just the stroller parking
lot that we're trying to have it not crowded. This
is are doing video visits or i tele medicine visits
or what they call it telehealth, where certain things can
be done that way where you don't even have to
leave your home and we can set up times with
people where we can look at certain things that way.
(02:11):
Like I've had very successful office visits for things like
beastings or allergic reaction type rashes that they thought were
that or you know, like ezema or rewards, or you know,
discussing medication changes. The next best thing to be in there, right, Okay,
let's say you're expecting your first baby and you don't
have the slightest clue on how to find the pediatrician
(02:35):
that you know you're going to need. Stat When is
the best time to start looking for a pediatrician? Really,
anytime during pregnancy, except for not maybe the last few weeks,
and even maybe before like thirty five, thirty six weeks,
like given at least a month or marek because you
don't know how long it's going to take, or maybe
you want to interview a bunch of people and you
(02:56):
want to have plenty of time, and it has to
match your schedules. Sometimes we play a lot of phone
to bag. So I think early is always good, definitely,
essentially because there's always a slim possibility your baby might
come early surprise you. So you want to be all set.
How do you start? What are the first things to consider?
And I would imagine the first first first thing is
(03:16):
deciding if you're going to use a pediatrician or family physician,
you know, I think that that decision depends on the
family physicians experience. You know, pediatricians are specifically trained and
only trained in the health, development and illnesses in children,
and that's very specific. So there are lots of things
(03:38):
that we scream for you know. Now I've done this
for twenty years. You know I can eyeball stuff and
be like that's okay, that's not okay, you know, things
like that. So some family physicians deal a lot more
with older kids or maybe more adults. So it depends
on how much of their practice is really real true
general pediatrics. I think that matters um And then to
(03:59):
actually find a pediatrician, you do want someone who is
board certified. It will say after their name, after the
M D or the d O, it will say f
A a P. So that's Fellow of American Academy Pediatrics,
which means they're board certified. Now some people don't put
those initials after their name, but you can always call
their office and make sure their board certified or look
them up even online. Often it's the will be a
(04:20):
lot of times it makes the initial recommendation or will
give a list of people. Call these offices, talk to
these people. Yeah, that's how Emma found you. In fact,
was her be recommended you? And you can also ask
friends or coworkers. Definitely very helpful because you may have friends.
They know you, they know your style, they know that
you're either a worried about certain things, or you're not
(04:41):
and they may be able to go this is a
good fit for you. Yeah, and I wouldn't necessarily go
by online reviews as much as those no, because sometimes,
like even like for our yell page, they'll put a
one star because the person was mad, because our office
doesn't take people who don't vaccinate. So you given you
went on yelp and give us a one start, gotcha? Yeah,
so you know what I mean. It's extremes. It's either
(05:02):
super happy or like super mad. So clearly some parents
are going to have more of a choice than others
because of insurance coverage or because of their location if
they're in a rural area where there are a few choices.
But if you have the choice, would you suggest um
having an interview, consult with a potential candidate, or would
(05:22):
you even suggest two or three? Yes, I think it's
good to kind of get a list of people and
maybe narrow it down. You could narrow it down by
how many other friends you know that go there and
I'm happy with them, or how far is the schleft
to the office, you know, especially in a city like
l A where it could take you like an hour
(05:42):
to not even go that far, so traffic, office location
and hours and all of those things do matter, and
then it is good to do a visit. We used
to bring pregnant women into the office and we would
sit down and meet with them. Now we're not, so
we're doing it either virtually on a video and visit
or via phone call too. And I feel like you
might miss a lot in a phone call if you're
(06:04):
not you know, making eye contact, at least for me,
I feel like a video call would be, if possible,
would be prefercent. That's what we do. Yes, and even
if you've made your decision without a console, do you
think it's important to have one call or video visit
before the delivery so that you're all kind of all
(06:24):
set about what's going to happen, what you can expect. Typically,
what I always did when I did those was I
also would talk about what's what's going to happen at
the hospital even during that. So I usually say so
once the baby's out, they call our office right away,
and then we come see the baby, and we kind
of give them that, but they should call if they
still have more questions. For sure, you make it sound
(06:45):
so easy once the baby's out just you know, just
like that. Let's let's dig into some of the topics
you'll want to cover with a potential pediatrisian. I imagine
some of these you could just go over with the
office off when you make your call for the appointment.
Hospital affiliation does that matter? I mean, we like to
(07:06):
see our newborns right when they come out, like we
enjoy going in the morning and seeing the new babies.
But it doesn't always work out. Sometimes their insurance doesn't
cover the hospital that were so at least if you
know we'll see them within usually forty eight hours after
going home, then that's also good because they do have
people who will cover and sometimes the OBI who delivers
(07:27):
that the hospital has a pediatrician they work with really well,
and we'll recommend to see your baby until you come
to our office. Do you think there are benefits to
going into there's probably fewer than ever. But solo practice
as opposed to group practice or a practice that combines
a nurse practitioner or physicians assistant. Some it depends on style,
Like I know there's parents, Like we have five doctors
(07:50):
right now in our practice, UM and so we have
a busy practice and a busy office. Not prouding anymore
though at least, but we do really have a good
number of patients that we see. So for us, if
you want an appointment at a certain time, like for
the check up, make it on your way out, because
an office that is on the busier side, their availability
(08:10):
maybe a little bit tighter um to get you in
at a time that you want, whereas a smaller office
maybe with one or two doctors, depending how busy they are.
You can find out those kind of things like how
long is the way time to get an appointment, same
day appointments, all of those things, and then you know
if you have qualified nurse practitioner. You know, typically pediatric
(08:31):
nurse practitioners are quite good, intend to know their limitations,
and they are also supervised by a physician as well.
It does depend on what's available in your area. I
will say. One other thing is that in our practice
I have found it's nice to have several doctors there
at one time. There's always like two or three of
us because also we'll talk to each other, run things
(08:51):
by each other, or I'll say, look, I'm not going
to be here tomorrow, but when you come back, I
want you to see doctor so and so. So I'm
gonna bring her in so you can meet her. And
now way tomorrow you come back for us to look
at the wound or the cut or listen to the lungs.
You'll know who it is and she'll be able to
know what's going on. But there's definitely a benefit to
seeing generally this same pediatation for every world baby check
(09:14):
up as possible. Yes, and you do want to know
who's covering you know if that doctor, especially in a solo,
practices on vacation because us we always have multiple ones
of us around. You're not allowed to have vacation, right,
be off, it's not like we're going anywhere, No exactly,
say cation. Um. So the phone calls when parents have questions,
(09:36):
should you ask how those are handled? Typically? Are there
call in times or is it a free for all
and you wait for a callback. Some doctors do have
call in ours where people can just call UM. A
lot of them take a message and the return the
calls like we return the calls usually between twelve fifteen
and one fifteen and then after five of it's a
specific call where they need us. But we do have
(09:58):
trained nurses who do phone calls and often are the
first ones on the phone triage because a lot of
times they can tell you, you know what, you need
to just come in. I'm going to give you an appointment,
or that is totally fine, and that is going around,
and if that fever is still there by tomorrow, we'll
just call in the morning. We'll get you in. They know.
I get messages, like yesterday, I got a few. The
nurse put them right in my box. She said, this
(10:18):
one you need to call, or this one really would
prefer to just talk to you, and that's fine, and
we just call them mat and protocol for emergencies. And
I think it's kind of like a Murphy's law of
sick kids. But it's always like Saturday night at three am.
Did you ask about that as well. Yeah. It's also
like who's covering and who handles the after hours calls.
(10:39):
So some people have on call centers that take over
and then only reach out to the actual doctor if
it's something that the on call nurse system doesn't handle. Um,
whether it's through the medical center they're affiliated with or
a company they hire for us, it's one of the
five doctors which take turns each night on call and
so after hours, it's our same phone number and it
(10:59):
gives two options. If it's the emergency, you press this
and leave a message and we get paged right away,
versus I have a question that I need to know tonight,
but I don't have no right to second. Then we
call back in about one and after two hours. On
those I'm sure you have the parents who think everything
is an emergency. We do. That's okay, we know, and
you know all those basics are super important, you know,
(11:20):
and you can ask about how billing has done all that,
all those logistics, But I think even more important than
that is making sure that pediatrician is on the same
page as you when it comes to certain philosophies and
points of view immunizations. I know that's a non negotiable
(11:48):
in your office, like every parent needs to accept immunizations
for their their baby. What would you say to a
prospective parent who comes in and says, I am really
nervous about this whole vaccination thing. I heard this or that.
As you know, it's also become like a huge topic.
(12:08):
So I do like to give them perspective because what's
happened now is because these parents are not seeing polio
every day, and they're not seeing measles, and they're not
seeing newmaccocklemaningitis and hidmeningitis with children with hearing loss and
brain damage, and you're not seeing it because of these
fabulous vaccines. That you need to realize that these diseases
(12:29):
come back when we stop vaccinating. People travel all over
the world. There are countries that don't have access to
the vaccines, and we are lucky that we have them.
So I do go through my years of experience what
I have seen, how all of us have kids. We've
all vaccinated our kids with everything. They're all totally fine
and healthy, and we just really want them to know
(12:49):
that it's benefits benefits benefits much outweigh the risk exactly,
and everyone around your baby should be up to date
on other refinings. Absolutely true breastfeeding. You're not gonna find
pediatricians who are not pro breastfeeding. Of course they're pro breastfeeding,
but should you ask about how much hands on guidance
(13:10):
you will be able to receive in the office, for instance,
are their knowledgeable nurses or even a certified lactation consultant
on staff. Because breastfeeding is the natural process that doesn't
always come naturally, so it depends how much trouble people
are having. And I have found that the nurses at
the huspital I'm affiliated with have just become better and
(13:32):
better and better, and they have great lactation consultants. So
we really like to make sure before we actually they
walk out of the hospital that they really at least
have seen someone who really can get them to latch,
and that they feel at least like they can latch
that baby before they get home. Now, sometimes it goes
off the rails once you're home, right the hospital, everything
seems to be fine, and you get home and you
can't latch her baby, and all bets off when the
(13:54):
mail comes in right right, yes, exactly, and then you're
dealing with all of those things. So um, when they
come in a day or two her and we check
in and we see how they're going, if they are
having a lot of problems, I will make a bunch
of suggestions like let's try this position, let's do this,
let's try this, maybe pump a few minutes just to
pull the nipple out and then stop and put the
baby on, and we give them lots of things they
(14:14):
can try There are some lactation consultants that we work
closely with and they always give them their card. Nowadays,
they do a lot of virtual visits, but there are
those cases where they might need like up close hands
on just to get the baby on and then they
back away and have their masks on and stand back,
and that's very short and probably low risk, and they're
very careful. On the flip side, say mom is planning
(14:36):
to for whatever reason, formula feed, should she mention that
just to get sort of a gauge of whether she
might be judged for that decision. Definitely should. I mean,
hopefully they're not being judged for that. We understand there
are certain personal decisions. For some people. That's a very
personal decision. Some can't rest feed because they have medical
(14:57):
reasons or they're on medications, or they've had surgeries on
their breast that it's not gonna work, and they know
that and it's fine, you know, and we definitely help
them through it. And some women just really don't like
the idea, or they're going back to work in two weeks,
so there's a lot of reasons. So no judge. So
you want to find a pediatrician who is supportive of
(15:18):
whatever you decide to do ultimately, whether it's breastfeed for sure,
time a long time now, nutrition and supplements, Right, if
you have strong feelings about that, is that something you
should talk to the pediatrician about for sure, because there
are a lot of them, and you're gonna hear a
lot of things, and there are only certain ones that
(15:38):
really we feel are safe to use wild breastfeeding, because
there's no studies on the impact of any of these
on newborn babies, So there's a lot we don't know,
And you certainly don't want to risk anything any kind
of danger of toxic the allergic reaction, anything like that.
So you definitely don't want to take something without checking
with your doctor completely. And I think it's just probably
(15:59):
good to get all of these issues on the table.
You don't want a parent to hold back about anything. No, definitely, definitely. Okay,
So you've covered the nuts and bolts of what is
important to look for in a pediatrician, But then there
are some intangibles, right, don't you think for Emma it
was so important to have a doctor who wasn't an
alarmist um and so her non alarmists obstetrician referred her
(16:25):
to you a non alarmists pediatrician who just as importantly
was able to take her concerns seriously while also offering reassurance.
For me, it was all about empathy and a sense
of humor. I feel like a sense of humor takes
parents far and pediatricians far in the relationship listening. I
(16:47):
was just gonna say, it's exactly like my my little
list is like, a sense of humor definitely helps. Listening
skills are super important, and also being able to give
the parent perspective too. You know, it's super important to
go look and even sometimes from my own experience with
my son's I'll even go, look, Luke broke his arm
(17:08):
in multiple places and we had to have surgery and
they had to put a ran or whatever, and we
got through it. And I've been there and this is
gonna be fine, and this is what we're gonna do,
or whatever it was. I'm able to reassure that it's
it's gonna get better, it's gonna go wait. I promise you.
You know, so, is that actually something you should put
on your checklist like that? The pediatrician is also a
(17:29):
mom or a dad You know, it's interesting because I
have friends who practice in one runs a clinic in
York and he doesn't have kids. H he's you know, fabulous,
you know, brilliant and fabulous, so like you can't. It's
funny you think that, oh, well they have to have children,
but not necessarily so interesting. But I think the perspective
is often really helpful because you've been in the trenches
(17:52):
and world perspective, like, remember, there's this many millions of
kids who have done this or been through this or
whatever and they're fine now. So yeah, what about exam
table manner? Like that's going to be super hard to judge,
you know, until your your baby is on the table.
(18:13):
So what would you look for? You know, it is
hard to tell. But I think when you do do
the interview, like you said, if you can get a
video one that at least it's helpful. I mean, I
like to talk to the babies. That's how I can
do my part of my developmental assessment is I just
let them stare at me and see what happens, you know,
and and the back and forth with the baby and
(18:33):
I dangle my step and so I kind of spend
time with them. So I can see if they're reaching
and grabbing, if they're trying to roll for things, and
and just staring at the baby is important to let
them look at your face. And I watched them, and
I watched their eye contact and the social skills. So
and you know what, as you and I know what
is better for a baby's social and language development than
people talking to them eye contact, singing, talking, narrating your day. Right,
(18:58):
So I also believe in mom gut and I feel
it's important for doctors to respect it. Remember when Emma
had lenox with the local site was infected and she
had the mom got something wasn't right, and she persevered
and sure enough he ended up very rare case, but
ended up, you know, with a staff infection. So what
(19:22):
are your feelings on mom cut. Obviously it's not gonna
be a but right. I think that it's very different
with first baby Mama and third baby momat too. But
we know that and that's fine, but we always want
to address it whatever the concern is. You know, at
least take it seriously and say, you know what, I
see why you're saying that, or you feel this way.
(19:42):
But here's X, Y and Z to explain why this
is okay, or you know what, you're absolutely right, let's
do this like you're right, I think the formula isn't
agreeing with the baby, and let's take the poop for
blood or you know, so you at least do something
to address it, and sometimes just to alleviate those worries
and concerns. And most of the time the baby is fine,
(20:04):
vast majority of time, but when in doubt, check it out.
It's just better. Now, it's better. And that actually brings
me to my final point. The way I see it,
the relationship with your pediatrician, just like your obie or
your midwife, should be a partnership. So you as parents
will contribute what you know best, and that's your baby.
And first time parents out there all saying, what do
(20:25):
you mean, I don't know anything about my baby, But
in fact, you see your baby every day, every night,
and so you will get to know your baby, and
you will know your baby best. And then the pediatrician
contributes to that partnership what he or she knows best,
and that's all the medical expertise and experience, and then
you put that together and and it's a beautiful thing.
(20:47):
But what's your best advice for building a good relationship
with the pediatrician that you do choose. I think listening
on both sides is good, you know, I think that's important.
I think that make ensure that you do ask your
questions and that they are willing to answer them so
that you don't feel brushed off or rushed is good.
(21:09):
And also, you know, on the on the parents side,
you know, making sure that you know you show up
on time for your appointments and that you kind of
follow a lot of the stuff that we suggest that
will actually help you. And if you disagree, I want
to know, you know, I'll be if or if you
tried it and it didn't work, fine, let's talk about
(21:31):
it and make clean b So communication that's the key
to any good relationship, including the relationship between parents and pediatrician.
And you will spend almost as much time with your
pediatrician as you will with your partner, so you want
to make this relationship work. So I want to thank
you Dr Crosby for joining us and walking us through
(21:52):
how to find the best pediatrician. Thank you, thanks for
having me say love my baby love. I need you,
Oh how I need you. Thanks for listening remember, I'm
always here for you. What to Expect is always here
(22:13):
for you. We're all in this together. For more on
what you heard on today's episode, visit what to Expect
dot com slash podcast. You can also check out What
to Expect when You're Expecting, What to Expect the First Year,
and the What to Expect app. And we want to
hear from you. Connect with us on our community message
(22:33):
board or on our social media. You can find me
at Heidie Murkoff and Emma at Emma Being w t
E and of course at What to Expect. Baby Love
is performed by Riley Biterer. What to Expect is a
production of I Heart Radio. From more shows from I
Heart Radio check out the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
(22:57):
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. In my
Arms right, don't You Stay? Knija Kneeda, Baby Love, Baby
Low
Popular Podcasts
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com