December 9, 2025 • 42 mins
What happens when one of the internet’s biggest comedy creators finally slows down and looks inward?
In this episode of You Versus You, Lex Borrero sits down with Lele Pons to explore the woman behind the viral videos: the immigrant child who didn’t speak the language, the only child craving validation, the creator battling OCD and mental health, and now the mother learning to love her imperfections and slow down.
Lele opens up about:
• How physical comedy and dark humor became her survival tools
• The moment Will Smith told her she inspired him
• Leaving Venezuela, culture shock in the U.S., and feeling completely alone
• OCD, intrusive thoughts, and why mental health is an explanation, not an excuse
• Fame, loneliness, and becoming a “character” instead of herself
• How her husband taught her to love her imperfections
• Motherhood, legacy, and the one word that defines her today: “unbreakable.”
If you’ve ever struggled with validation, burnout, or feeling “not enough,” this conversation will hit home. This is not a highlight reel – this is the real Lele Pons, in a safe space, facing her own battle of you versus you.
■ Subscribe to You Versus You for more conversations on purpose, mental health, and the human condition.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to another episode of You Versus You. Today, I
have global influencer, actor, director, producer, business woman, you name it,
She's done it all, lell it punts. We touch on
motherhood has changed her life, her influence, how she deals
with fame, and how mental health has been her superpower.
Let it Welcome to you versus You.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
I'm so excited to have you here. I'm glad that
we were able to make the time to share this
safe space. And you know, you build an amazing career
making people laugh.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
But what is one thing that makes you laugh until
you cry?
Speaker 2 (00:33):
One thing? I like? Man, I like the humor back
in the day, Like I like dark humor, like well,
White Chicks the best, My god, man, White Chicks is
such a funny movie. I love dry humor too, like
Adam Sandler, just like I like humor that you just
(00:54):
like the you like the stupidest lyne But it's just
like any like little things make me laugh to be honest,
Like when there's like you know in those movies when
they like someone's doing a joke right and there's that
one person in the back who come in something no
one actually cares. I love that person.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Okay, you know what I mean, Like that person is
like you stick like Barry Adam Sandler in the background.
Mm hmm.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
I was watching a video last night of you know,
people with their dogs, Like they're walking into the house
and then the dog pulls them and they just like
go flying, and I'm just I was literally dying. Oh my,
I love that kind of thing. I don't know why,
but I like.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Physical comedy is the best, so good, the best.
Speaker 1 (01:36):
Ridiculousness to me is the best.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
Oh my god, to.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
See people get her. I don't know why.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
I mean that was how I started my career and
Vine just getting hurt.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
Talking about Vine. If you could sit down with the
girl who started ten years ago and ye, yes, her
first one, what would you tell her about that journey
she's about to go on.
Speaker 2 (01:55):
You're gonna make Shakira. That's right, You're gonna make Shagara.
Gonna be really close with her and different, not too close,
but like just you're gonna enough. You're gonna be like,
no way, I don't believe him. I would like I
would tell her things that she's manifested, that they came true,
you know, because as time went on, I had different goals,
but I know the goals that I had when I
(02:16):
was on Vine, which was, you know, to dance Gasolina
like you know, the Shakira and and meet these people
and like so it's like that she would understand like,
for example, you're gonna be a mom, you're gonna be married,
You're going to I don't know, my god do dancing
with the stars, you know, like she at that moment,
I don't think. And every year there's something.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
You know, out of all the things you've been able
to accomplish, is there one that stands out is like, wow,
I can't believe I did that.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
Not that I can't believe I did that. There was
one moment in my career that I was like, I
definitely did something good in my career that this happened
when Will Smith when I met him for me, when
he was like, you were one of the reasons why
or you you know, inspired me to do videos you
I watched you just like you know, build your career.
(03:06):
I was like, I made it. I somehow influencer touched
such a great actor likes someone that I love actors
and I love directing and I love that. So that's
my world. I love that more than anything. So the
fact that as I'm seeing someone grew, like, you know,
(03:27):
in their career, they're looking back at me, that they're
also looking at me. It's like you never know who's watching.
And like for him to say that, you know how
many people can say it, but for him to say it,
I believe.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
It, you know, you know it's the I have a
crazy Will Smith story. So when I was a kid,
I was obsessed with bad boys, like to the point
that I went to the theater Wow, and I stole
the poster, Like they just stole. They had a huge
wall poster outside, you know the vinyls that they put
And I told my friend, and here's the thing, we're
gonna go, like right around two in the morning, nobody's
(03:59):
going to see me. And I took the wall poster
off the theater sur prisident never got arrested us, and I
put it on the back wall of my room.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
And my dream was always to work with Will Smith
and to have something to do with bad boys, so
much so that tiny one of the years, for my birthday,
he gave me an old VHS of Bad Boys and
I had it in my office and one day Will
Smith walks in and he asked me to manage him,
(04:34):
and I couldn't believe that. Like I was staring at him,
staring at the at the at the movie. I was like,
is this really happened? And I got the chance for
the past two years to spend time with him, and
there's so many of those moments. I think that's like
the highlight of my.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
Career, you see, like those like little moments that it's like, man,
I understand it because it was a dream of yours,
like you were you know what I mean, and then
somehow it becomes true. That's what you would say to
your younger self.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
I couldn't believe. And the first time actually that we met,
he was screening parts of the new movie for me
and so I would say, oh hi, Will, Oh my god.
He was wearing orange, which is meaningful color for me,
and I was like, this is a sign. But the
like we're about to go into the theater and I'm like,
I have to go to the bathroom and he's like, oh,
me too. So literally my first time is with Will
Smiths were like sh sh sh hi, what's up? Man?
(05:27):
You know, He's like, how's that piss? Going, it's going, well,
that's crazy. So that's an amazing thing about you know,
the career that we've choseness the opportunities to do these
things that just seemed like so far off. Yes, if
you look back in all the things that you've done
as well, which one has touched the most about yourself?
Speaker 2 (05:49):
When I did my documentary about mental health, I think
it touched me and I was happy to touch at
least one person, you know. Doing the documentary about the
secret I have pons on YouTube was something that, like,
you know, it's even if it wasn't like the biggest
for many people, or I think for me, it was
like it was very important, and it was in a
moment that not a lot in twenty eighteen, not a
(06:11):
lot of people were talking about mental health. It wasn't
like a thing you know now it's I love that,
it's like something that, like I hear a lot about
mental health and in your experience and being vulnerable. So
I think that's one of them. That's definitely one of them.
I think my YouTube videos with my friends, I mean
(06:31):
it's like it's it's just like, I my god, it's
just I had so much fun. There's nothing better than
doing something that you love.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
Do you feel like some of that once it turned
into a real business and you had to deliver and
continue to deliver.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
Has that when when something you know, it's crazy, when
something turns into a business, sometimes you might lose how
you started, which was just for fun, you know, because
it becomes a business and there's people involved and then.
But I really never lost that, you know, because of
the friends that I made in my YouTube Hannah Ann
(07:11):
or Rudy Shots, Nana, so many, so many people that
I h Thanks to them, I am where I am today.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
In your journey, you've been very outspoken. As you mentioned
at the beginning of the documentary of your mental health.
What do you think is the most misunderstood part about
dealing with mental health issues?
Speaker 2 (07:32):
You know what it is understanding? Let me explain why
if you're not going through it, people don't see it
as their problem. People don't understand. So I think that
for example, of you right now you're having an episode,
I'm here, I'm gonna be like, oh like usually people
will be like, oh my god, like what's gonna because
(07:53):
you're not living it. So my thing is like mental
health is real for the person it's super real, and
that's something that not a lot of people understand, so
they just kind of you as like you're crazy or
this everybody on the internet when they do something that
for people are like, oh my gosh, she's crazy. Probably
something's happening, bro, you know what I mean? And also
(08:17):
very important. I don't think that using mental health sometimes
for actions is some like, oh, it's not an excuse, right,
but it's an explanation. I think there's in many cases
it is an explanation. Why did you do that? I
was like, it's not an excuse, but let me explain
to you why I yelled when I when I didn't
have to yell, you know, but no excuse, don't use
(08:41):
it an excuse.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Doctor Saliz wrote a book about the power of differences,
and it was that in There's genius in what people
call disorders. Oh yeah, do you feel that these things
that you know have been mental health struggles for you
have also been your superpowers? Yes?
Speaker 2 (09:00):
Sure? Yeah, Because let's say this, if everything in your
life has been perfect, you don't fight, and fighting is
what keeps you going, what makes you grow. So if
everything's perfect handed to you, everything is great, how do
(09:21):
you live, you're not human like you know what I mean.
I feel like my mental health has made me get
up because I don't want to be my diagnose. I
don't want to. I want to be better than that,
you know, so I want to use that and be
something else. So I think it makes you stronger, But
obviously it depends on the actions you're going to take.
(09:42):
You know, many times, you know, I didn't want to
go to therapy. Many times I didn't want to take
my pills. And those times because I, you know, I
I I was responsible, things happened. Of course, because it's
a chemical imbalance. You know. Sometimes you know, you might
not don't even have anything, But if you don't talk
about maybe I don't know you have depression, you don't
(10:04):
talk about it, it's going to hit you. For everybody,
we live in a world that is it's it's very toxic.
This world is very, very toxic, and it's getting to
a point that being mean and hateful and everything, it's
it's like a thing now, you know. So I don't know,
it's just like it's a very lonely world. So you
(10:26):
got to talk about your problems.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
You got to do that. Yeah, motherhood, what has it
touched it so far?
Speaker 2 (10:34):
My god, Oh, motherhood. It is such a different love.
It is a love that I actually love to love
someone more than you, more than anything in the world.
You know, I like that. It's not I'm not the
(10:54):
center of my story anymore.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
I like that.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
I like that the main character. I'll be in the
main character too. But is this baby, because you're about
to teach a like a person, like a human everything,
and I love to help with that process. So for me,
motherhood is starting all over again, and for me the
(11:19):
most important role that you're ever going to have, because
you can be anything you want. But what are you
leaving behind. You're leaving behind your grand your grandchildren, your daughter,
your son, your legacy. You're humans, you know, even if
you don't even have to have a baby about like,
even if you touch it, it's like you help a
(11:40):
niece for example. You know, for me, is helping my
daughter grow and seeing how she evolves and how she
physically changes. It's the it's the best gift ever, even
when she was inside inside me. There's an app called
what to Expect when You're expecting and just knowing, like
(12:03):
this week you make the ears, this week you make
the vocal cords. I love that process. I love to
love something more than anything in the world, and I
generally cannot. It's scary. It is scary and overwhelming because
even me being here in New York and now with her,
it's like a part of me is like somewhere, Like
(12:24):
I like, I don't have an arm, Like something's like missing,
you know. And it's scary because it's not about you anymore.
Speaker 1 (12:31):
Yeah, But I like that.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
I like that feeling that is not about you. I
like that it's about her everything.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
You know. One of the things that I've learned about
fatherhood and I talk a lot about it in this show,
is it gave me compassion towards my parents.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
Oh my god, I have so much. I always have respect,
but I understand my mom more and I know what
she went through and I love her. I mean, I've
always loved her, but I respect love, understanding all these
stuff together at once. And I think about like like
(13:04):
I was a baby, you know, like I can't believe
that I'm alive. You know that she kept me alive.
Can you believe that, like your mom kept you alive
because you are so vulnerable, you don't know what's going
You can't even see right, You see blurry, and I'm
here because of her, and you start to see that more.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
And she did all that while trying to figure out
her own life. Yes, one of the things that I've
I've taken into fatherhood for myself is the best thing
I can do for my child is to better me,
because there'll be a better example. I can take her
mistakes in a better way. And Will says this famously
where he says, the best part of being a parent
(13:42):
is where you get to a stage that you can
tell your kids I don't know, but we're gonna figure
it out together. I love that. And I love that
because you know, especially as Latinos, there's this ego thing
that comes with being a parent where it's like no, no, no, no,
you're gonna listen to me. Okay, you're gonna go left
because I told you left. And the truth is, we
just don't know, right, We're all still trying to figure
(14:06):
it out. We're all in this battle of you versus
you every day.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
Yeah. I teach my parents a lot. Yeah, Oh isn't
that crazy?
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Gon' ass kids?
Speaker 2 (14:14):
Yeah, And I mean they taught me everything, but I
do teach my So I wonder what my daughter is
definitely going to teach me a bunch of stuff, you know,
So I'm excited about that too.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
I think that's that's the truth. I think they're here
to teach you, to give you a lesson. They're here also,
Like one of the things that my daughter taught me
right away was I'll never forget this. She was stuck
in the ballpin. She was about a year and a half.
She was like crying and my wife weren't running to
grab her, and I said, hey, just give her a second.
I just want to see what happens. No, but she's
(14:44):
trying not just wait. And there was a point where
my daughter just said, oh, they ain't coming, push herself
out like backflip out of the ballpin, and then kept
on playing. And I said, wow, the human brain has
a capacity to help you so your problems. Yeah, it's
just that we are so programmed to not want to
(15:05):
sit in the hard times. Do not want to be
in the fire, And in the fire is the lesson.
After that, she never cried again in evolvement because she
knew she could get out. Yeah, And I thought that
that was such a personal lesson for me because again,
historically you've been taught, Hey, you're going through a hard time,
don't worry the lights at the end of the tunnel. Yeah,
(15:26):
like get out, You're going to get out through it.
And it's like, how about if we just learned to
love to sit in the fire and learn to dance
in it and in that find the gold. And that
brings me to my next question. Fellow he said, would
ask you, mom, what's the hardest part of being you?
What would you tell her?
Speaker 2 (15:43):
I think the hardest thing about being me is accepting
when I'm wrong. We always want to be right. We
don't want to be wrong, you know, we don't want
to make mistakes and everything. But it's okay accepting that
I'm wrong, except that I need help, accepting that I
need to go to therapy, that I that, you know,
(16:04):
accepting that it's it's okay to not to be perfect.
It's okay, you know. That for me is you know,
and I feel like for many people, you know, we
don't want to be wrong. You know, it's like, damn,
I fucked up, you know, especially for a daughter, you know,
for I don't want to fuck up for her. I
don't want to make mistake because I want her to
be like, you know, see my mom as like, oh,
like I want to be yes. So when it comes
(16:26):
to her, that would be it.
Speaker 1 (16:27):
The biggest lesson Your mistakes has touched you that you
want to teach her, And what's the biggest lesson? Your
success has touched you that you want to teach her
every mistake.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
It's okay to make mistakes, but you have to learn
from every single mistake and be better. Prove yourself that
you are not your mistake. So I think that's very important.
I've made many mistakes, but I but every single mistake
has led me to become a better person. No mistake
(17:00):
that I've made has made me a worse person. And
success something that success has taught me to slow down.
Success has taught me to slow down because I've done
so many things. And when you're really successful, let's say that,
you know, you forget almost everything and you just remember
(17:20):
what you did last year or two years ago, three years.
And I've been in this for thirteen years and I
don't remember anything from my first six years.
Speaker 1 (17:27):
You know, that's an interesting concept because again another another
through line that I heard everybody that's here and I
can relate to. It is when you're in the run
of success, when you're in the midst of like your
world and you're building, you're living so much for the
next moment that you forget to live that moment. Don
(17:47):
the author of un Charged Journey. He says most humans
live the experience for what they're hoping the experience is,
or what tomorrow will be, then the experience itself. And
I love that because I think if there's one thing
that I've been really wanted to teach people about you
versus you is one, you know, you're you're your biggest enemy,
like you're in your head you have every superpower to
(18:09):
overcome anything, and you have every power to them your
life in your mind. Two, we don't actually control anything.
You don't control our next breath, let alone how many
times we overplanned something and it doesn't come out exactly
how we want, like, yeah, So releasing of that and
(18:30):
being able to take the moment just for what it is.
Speaker 2 (18:32):
Yeah. I do, though, believe that you do control your
actions and how you're going to move forward after you
know what I mean, Like, if you make a miss,
for example, you make if you make a mistake, if
you do something. You have the option. You know, are
you gonna you know, sit back and cry or are
you gonna walk out? You know, I do believe you
do have control of your action. You have no control
(18:53):
of anything, nothing.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
Other than yourself, other than your versus.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
Yes, it's just you, you verse. And I do want
to teach that to my daughter. That's why I'm saying,
you're gonna make mistakes. So where are you gonna go?
There's always like two paths, And I'll love you no
matter what.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
Oh, I would say more than ever. Kids grow up
today wanting to be at La punts right, wanting to
be either a streamer or a content creator. Yeah, there's
a little girl like you watching this and says, oh
my god, I love Lela. Why would be the three
advice that you would give her on her way up?
Speaker 2 (19:31):
I know this is so cliche of like me saying like, oh,
don't listen to haters. I would literally say, the bigger
you are, the more haters you're gonna get. Just have
that already in mind, all right, If you don't get hate,
you're not big, you know what I mean? Because I
feel like the like, look at Taylor Swift, My god,
you know, she even gets booted, but she's the biggest
(19:53):
and she will always be, you know, So have that
in mind already. If you're doing this because you want
to be famous and you want to be loved and
you want to be popular, don't you know, like, don't
do it for that, Do it because you really love it.
That's another thing I want to say, if you really
that you really love it, Because if you really love something,
you're not ever gonna get tired of it, you know,
because going into something depends on the reason or the
(20:15):
or your motives. What's going to make you like lasts
longer is if you're having a blast and you and
you even if like you have to take a break,
you don't even want to take a break, you know.
And that's the last thing that I want to tell
that that child is take a break. Even if everything's
going great, Oh you're on top of the world, take
(20:35):
a two week break, I swear to God, because if
you don't take a small break one you might lose yourself.
You might make mistakes because you're going too fast. Don't
go too fast. Be present, And you know, we always
have that moment that when so much is happening, you
lose yourself, you get a you have a meltdown. So
before you even even if it's everything's perfect, have a break.
(20:58):
My every every single time that I've made mistakes or
I've done bad choices or like a bad brand, not brand,
like a bad call on my career is because I
was going way too fast and I didn't take a break.
Speaker 1 (21:25):
One of the things that we talk about on the
show a lot is our brains are trying to make
decisions while sitting in a car listening to hard rock music.
That's your brain every single day. And we've been taught
this idea that the only way to succeed is hustling
harder than everybody else. And that's smarter.
Speaker 2 (21:45):
It's hustling smarter.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
I say, it's not one hundred percent of the shots
you don't take, it's one hundred percent of the shots
you don't see.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Work in silence. Work in silence that way. Privacy is
your power. It is partably And I'm a hypocrite because
everything is public for me. But trust me, Like the
people say, Adele, all these people that come out all
of a sudden, they're like Liddy Gaga, you know what
I mean, Like they don't have to announce everything. You know,
(22:15):
they're working, and then all of a sudden they pop
out doing like something that they've been working on for example.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
You know, Yeah, I think the challenge in a lot
of the conversations with a lot of successful people, the
challenge is always learning to stay still doing you learn
to be a doer, and standing still is where you
listen when you hear. And I really have learned that
in my own personal life that the idea that we
earn something, or the idea that it's our hard work
(22:43):
who gets to something, and we realize that it's all
a gift. We're good shepherds of that gift, and we
can put discipline and but I really encourage people to
generally learn how to stand still and let give your
brain an opportunity to be able to hear, to get clarity,
and to be able to see. I really believe that.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
And it's not a waste of time. It's actually gonna
save you more time because you're going to use your
time wisely, you know, if you take if you do that,
I do completely agree with them.
Speaker 1 (23:13):
I had Charlie walk here yesterday, who worked you know,
famously with Taylor Shift throughout her whole career.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
I know him.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
He said something that I thought was really great. He said,
Taylor understands that her fans are the boss, and she
works really hard at pleasing her boss and storytelling to
her boss. Do you agree with that in your case?
Speaker 2 (23:32):
Yeah, I mean I think, you know, like her doing
like the East Easter eggs, you know, that's how you
call it. That's for the fans. She does extra she
she she makes them like it's entertaining because they're kind
of a part of it, you know. There is probably
like the boss like she like, they work together, you know.
(23:54):
And I like also the fact that, let me tell you,
she probably does take breaks, you know what I mean,
And in those breaks she's at home silence, you know
what I mean. She's never like I'm pretty sure that
who posts for her on social media as somebody, you know.
Like I mean, if you give everything to people, almost
nothing is yours, you know what I mean. Like every
when you put something out, it belongs to the rest
(24:17):
of the world, you know. So it's good to be
a little bit back because people like mystery people let
people miss you, you know, because if you're always on
their faces, they get tired.
Speaker 1 (24:34):
Sometimes, I think that's one of the hardest things for me,
you know, in the era of social media, is this
idea of kind of giving every part Because I'm such
an introretet I enjoy like nobody knowing I have like
the same five friends my whole life. I don't like associate.
So one of the hardest things, like with my team
is like, but you got to do content, but you
(24:56):
gotta do this, but you gotta. I found it to
be something that I really really stro. If you can
give me anyatives, what would they be in activating my
social media presence?
Speaker 2 (25:07):
Like you want me to give you a tip of
how to become bigger onto the.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
Media, how to just be comfortable with social media?
Speaker 2 (25:15):
I would say, be your audience? What would if you
were your audience? What would you like to see? When
I pose on social media, I think of like what
would if I was someone that would follow me? What
would I like to see? You know what I mean?
That's why I've been able to Okay, I started on
vine I was sixteen years old. Okay, well they're growing
(25:37):
with me. Do they want to see me come? Always
be the same girl? No, Like, you have to choose
a path, you have to show everybody where you're going
through because their fat they're going with you, they're growing
up with you. So you know, you go, you move
for the first time to your apartment, your first job,
you change friends, you find a guy, you get married,
(25:59):
you have advocate. I mean, it doesn't have to be
like that, but like being able to tell a story
with your experience is something that I would follow you
for that, you know, not did.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Write that down in the journal. Let's talk about your childhood.
So you left Venezuela, came to the US. How was
that experience?
Speaker 2 (26:20):
It was very hard because I came in an age
where I was starting to talk, you know what I mean.
And from the age of let's say two to five
and a half, almost six, Yeah, five and almost six,
you already started to talk. You haven't gotten to school yet,
so imagine, okay, I'm good at talking and communicating. Now
(26:44):
you're gonna go to a school that does not speak Spanish.
So I'm like, how do I communicate with my friend?
There's my first day of school and I don't even
know how to communicate with anybody because nobody in my
school talked English, I mean Spanish. So that for me
was the challenge. If I had left, for example, maybe
a lot older, for example, after like you know, because
(27:06):
they also teach you it's English, you know, in school.
But if either had left, let's say maybe at two
or three, you know, I would have been better like
communicating in school, or if I left later also, but
I was there in the like the first day of
school was in a school that I did not know
how to talk and also had just learned, you know,
(27:27):
the communica. I was five, so it was hard.
Speaker 1 (27:30):
Yeah, those those first I went through the same thing,
but I was a little older. I got to the
US when I was seven. I'm not that older talking
about like I get in and I remember the first
day of school because I had I remember her name.
Her name was Miss Brown, and she she was trying
to teach easel. And I had a bunch of kids
(27:54):
that were Portuguese in my class, so they didn't even
speak Spanish on top of that, so I was like god,
only Spanish speaking and other six classmates were Portuguese, and
I was trying to have a conversation with them. So
because I couldn't communicate, I would just draw. And I
remember I got like my first question a girl and
she was Portuguese, and I would draw like a miky
mouse and send it to her and be like, you know,
(28:15):
but I those moments are hard. I think, you know,
we underestimate the shock that it does to a kid
to learn that.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
Yes, especially because you know, if you know you're moving
to let's say America or somewhere anywhere Italy, your mom
and your dad they start prepping you or talking. Mine
was just we moved from one day to another for
family reasons. Yeah, do you get what I mean?
Speaker 1 (28:38):
Same.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
I hadn't even know we were moving. They told me,
like when we arrived, like in Miami, they were like,
this is going to be our home. You're starting school
in like a month, okay, Like you know, so they
didn't prep you. It was not I wasn't prepped. And
in the same year that I moved to Miami and
I was already feeling lonely, my father and my mom separated,
(29:01):
so I had no friends, Like I didn't know how
to speak in my in my high school and my
in my kindergarten, and my parents separated, you know what
I mean? And I had problem mentally I didn't know yet,
you know. Oh, CD, for example, was a big, big
one that I had, so everything came together, you know.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
So, yeah, that culture shock. Similar to your story. I
came from one day to the next, and I came
from living a life in Columbia that was like privileged.
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Oh my god, yes, I had last I remember my life,
my life, yeah, in.
Speaker 1 (29:36):
This little apartment, and I remember my mom having to
start frying food to sell at the airports. And I
would go to school or Lino like straight fang. And
to this day it's something that like, I hate smelling
like food. It's like the one if the place smells
like food when I walk into the.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
Yeah, you know that sometimes what you go through when
you're young, Yeah, it kind of you don't know why,
but it kind of like.
Speaker 1 (30:03):
Yeah, it creates a neumal path in your brain that
teaches your identity or this trauma.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
That you will deal with and you don't even know
until you talk to a therapist and you go like, ah,
I remember that.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
That's why I'm like, this is there a part of
your childhood you're still dealing with.
Speaker 2 (30:19):
This is horrible, but like, well, not horrible, but a
validation by some other people, which is a big mistake
because I really wanted to have friends. I started to
be like the physical comedy clown of the school my
grade because I wanted you know, people to like, oh, like,
you know, invite me to stop because she's a funny one,
so do. And I remember there was this one girl
(30:42):
that was like, oh, she's like she would invite me
because she either they were laughing with me or laughing
at me, but she would be like, oh, like let
it do something funny. She would literally say that. She
would be like, let it do something funny for us
like that, you know, because I wanted friends so badly
because I was an only child. Also, you know, my
parents were you know, separated, new school, everything. So I
(31:06):
was like, okay, well I don't know how to communicate,
so I'm just gonna be like funny or like fall
I don't know, you know. So as an early age,
I was trying to fit in by you know, comedy
or something or you know, being like a validate. Also,
when your parents separated, you don't even know why. After
I knew why, I was like, my god, this my
(31:27):
dad like not love me, you know, like obviously he did,
but he didn't tell me the reason why in that moment,
which I think he should have, you know, but for
years I never knew why. So in my mind as
a six year old, I didn't understand. So I was like,
oh my god, I hope they like me this person
like nah, you know. So it followed me to like
(31:48):
even social media. Many things that we do in social
media is because like, oh my god, like I'm gonna
post this, I wonder how many you know likes it's
gonna happen, you know what I mean? But I didn't.
The good thing is like in Vine, I actually did
it for myself, you know, because in Vine in my
high school, nobody really like I was. I was not
(32:09):
like you know, and I just did Vine because there
are so many weird people on Vine that were doing
the same thing. I felt like connected that I wanted
to become friends with them, so I collabed with them,
but it wasn't a thing. So I think that's also
helped me.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
Does that part of you manifest and other things outside
of social media that do you feel like when you're
in your personal relationship? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (32:32):
Yeah, sometimes yeah, I mean sometimes yeah. With relationships and
you and my husband, it's like it's like literally like
I know you did it, Like I see the work
are you doing or something I don't know. It could
be like did you see like my hair and everything?
He's like, yeah, I told you, like I saw it.
I love it. And I was like, yeah, but but
but did you see that I did something different? You know,
like I know I saw it. You know. It's like
it's like the constant need of just like yeah, like
(32:56):
be validated. I don't know. Yeah, but that's not that
is a problem.
Speaker 1 (33:00):
By the way, It's really interesting, right. I had doctor
Gail Saltz yesterday, who's a psychiatrist who studies the power
in differences, right, and most of us were driven by
these hurts, by these things that make us so different.
Speaker 2 (33:14):
Right.
Speaker 1 (33:15):
Yes, And I would say one hundred out of one
hundred people that have sat on that chair where you're sitting,
I've struggled with the same, struggle with the same I
think as a society, we struggle with not feeling enough
because we're programmed every day to not feel enough. Right.
Like that's how I sell you a really expensive jacket
by saying, if you don't have the expensive jacket, you
know it look really good. Yeah, but it is something
(33:37):
that affects everyday life because you filter all the information
that's happening around you.
Speaker 2 (33:42):
And yes, even if people say something to you like oh,
like you're this, you're that, you're sometimes you don't believe it,
you know, and that's a problem. That's why for me
when when Will Smith told me that, I believed it
because who are you? You're not my mom? You know.
Their mom's always.
Speaker 3 (34:03):
One of the first people that I studied when I
wanted to do social media. I was like, she is
magical and how you could make the beginning, middle and
end in sixteen seconds was just like spectacular.
Speaker 2 (34:20):
And I respect you and admire you so much that
you're not a you don't bullshit. So it was one
of the first time that I was like, I mean,
I guess I am you know.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
So that's why let's talk about love. What was the
hardest part about finding someone to truly give yourself to
with fame, with the acclaim, with kind of your lifestyle.
Speaker 2 (34:43):
Too, is trust because when you're famous, or even when
you're rich, famous, popular, whatever you have, the famous, well
you really you have a thing of like why are
you with me? Why are you with me? Because like
there's a lot of beautiful, amazing people, there's not that
many and you know you might have something that they want,
(35:06):
you know, so it's first, I would say, patients get
to know, don't go straight into it. Like I when
I met my husband right now, we were together. We
were never together at the beginning. It took us like
a year to actually be together, you know, and we
even like he went this way, I went that way.
So when I found out he wanted me for me
(35:28):
because you know, like I don't want anything from you
and I don't want it, and he didn't want anything
for me, That's when I started the relationship there, you know,
but you know I was holding like, you know, study
the person first, because you have to protect yourself so
much in this in this world period. You have to
protect yourself because I want to go into a relationship
(35:51):
not with the mentality of like, well I just want
to go on this and maybe we end up together,
we don't. I don't care. No, I don't want to
waste time. So if I'm gonna let myself be with
someone and let that person in, is because that person's
going to stay.
Speaker 1 (36:05):
No, I feel I feel the same. I mean, I
think for me, the hardest part historically was that like
just finding someone that I could that I would trust
enough because I love hard. That's the thing.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Like I wear my heart in my sleeve, and I
don't want to cry, you know, I don't.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
Yeah, and I definitely don't want to cry. So what's
the biggest lesson he's taught you?
Speaker 2 (36:24):
A big lesson that Guana has taught me is to
embrace your imperfections because he loves my imperfections. So if
he loves it, and he told me, you know, yeah,
but look how you do this. I know it's not perfect,
but it's look at how fun, you know, Like some
he gives me examples of what he likes that I
don't like about myself. But I'm like, well, actually you
(36:44):
put it.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
That way, you know, sounds pretty good.
Speaker 2 (36:46):
Yeah, So to love your imperfections.
Speaker 1 (36:48):
I love that. What's your relationship with Fame? Do you
like it?
Speaker 2 (36:52):
Do you honestly like? It's my I think it's my responsibility.
If you know, I chose this life. I chose it.
I could have walked out, So I have to be
okay with where comes at me and I can leave
any time I want, you know. And if I'm still
here is because I love to do videos and everything
Fame came with what happened because I did do Vine
(37:12):
when it was not there was no word for influencer.
I did not you think Vine famous, like, you know,
I didn't know what that meant. But I loved doing
what I did so much, and I started growing, growing, growing,
And it wasn't like a thing like, oh, I got
a million followers in a year. No, no, no, it
was very slow. It took me like four years to
(37:32):
get a million, you know, like it was just so
so because I loved doing what I was doing, and
you know, not a lot of people understood it. So
with that came fame, right, and I loved it because
I loved the fame because of the people that I met,
for example, Will Smith, Adrian Brodi, Paris Hilton. I love
meeting people that I admire, for example, I love from
(37:53):
fame because it's a beautiful world that I've grown up
with and I'm privileged to be in the same room
with so many people that I love because I do
love movies and shows and music, so that I do
things and also like the things like that. It gives
you with opportunities as well. But it's just also it's
(38:13):
very lonely sometimes because the comments get to you. You know,
you don't want to tell it like and it's embarrassing
to be like, I don't like this guy told me
that I'm this and this, you know what I mean?
Like you want to be strong, like you know, like
I promise you that I've seen so many bad comments
and you don't even know who the person is. You
know that person left a long time ago. It's like
(38:34):
in the weird names you know, like Alex five four
three two that you know like who. So it is
it is tough because you get lost and like you,
sometimes you become a character. You don't even become yourself.
And I've seen that with friends of mine and I
saw it with me. I became the character that I
was playing in my videos and that wasn't me. So
(38:56):
when I go back to Miami, my family is like,
why are you talking like that? Talk normal? And that's
something from fame that scares me is that you, without
knowing become fake version of yourself that you created.
Speaker 1 (39:09):
For you know, for people talking about identity, where do
you feel the most comfortable being you? It's it at home?
Is it in front of the camera? Like where have
you been able to find that comfort of saying, okay,
this is the most developed version of myself because I
know for like you said, in our business, I created Lex.
(39:30):
Lex is the music executive, really successful manager, but myself,
which is what I'm now learning more and more through
this process of you versus you to separate is a
kid who loves cars, who like sings in the shower,
who's like, who's the complete opicer of people get intimidated
(39:51):
by meeting me in this side and I am like
the complete opposite human.
Speaker 2 (39:55):
I mean when I get drunk, you see the yeah right, no, no, no,
But I think directing my videos and making content that
I love, not for brandios, not for a reality show,
not for anything or script or anything. Every video that
I do on Instagram, on TikTok is me. It is
(40:18):
really me. It's a way I communicate. I don't even
talk sometimes, it's just a way to communicate, and that
is me. I love comedy, I love being relatable, right.
I love to do that, and I like to be creative.
I like the creativity. You know. I think that, and
then I think that me at home, me and me
(40:40):
at home and me with my friends. I'm I've learned
to be just really real with them with close friends
from my childhood, it was all.
Speaker 1 (40:50):
Said and done tomorrow, what message would you want to
leave to humanity if.
Speaker 2 (40:55):
Everything was done? Be better? Like, be better next time,
because there's a reason why the humanity is gone, for
it to happen, for humanity to be completely outs because
we did something. So let's find out what we did
so the next time the next humans come, they don't
go through what we're about to go through.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
You know, words have power, and we talk a lot
about on this show that while we're a lot more
kind to other people, we're really hard to ourselves.
Speaker 2 (41:24):
Yeah, worst enemies.
Speaker 1 (41:27):
What is one word that Lela needs to hear in
order to win her battle of you versus you today?
Speaker 2 (41:36):
One word unbreakable. I think that's one word that I
can describe myself. And there's a I don't know what movie,
but there's a there's something that my mom and everybody
always tells me, and I think it's a very famous
call that says this shall pass. Where was that movie
for this too shall pass? Yes, because you don't see
(41:59):
it in that moment, but it's but it does everything.
Speaker 1 (42:05):
Everything passes will famously says it and over until it's over,
and if you're still alive, then that means it was
not over. Let thank you for being part of you
versus You. I love that conversation. Thanks for making time,
and let this be the first of many. Thank you
You Versus You as a production of Me on sixteen
(42:27):
and Entertained Studios in partnership with the Iheartmichael to that
podcast network For more podcasts, listen to the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Welcome to another episode of You Versus You. Today, I
have global influencer, actor, director, producer, business woman, you name it,
She's done it all, lell it punts. We touch on
motherhood has changed her life, her influence, how she deals
with fame, and how mental health has been her superpower.
Let it Welcome to you versus You.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
I'm so excited to have you here. I'm glad that
we were able to make the time to share this
safe space. And you know, you build an amazing career
making people laugh.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
But what is one thing that makes you laugh until
you cry?
Speaker 2 (00:33):
One thing? I like? Man, I like the humor back
in the day, Like I like dark humor, like well,
White Chicks the best, My god, man, White Chicks is
such a funny movie. I love dry humor too, like
Adam Sandler, just like I like humor that you just
(00:54):
like the you like the stupidest lyne But it's just
like any like little things make me laugh to be honest,
Like when there's like you know in those movies when
they like someone's doing a joke right and there's that
one person in the back who come in something no
one actually cares. I love that person.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
Okay, you know what I mean, Like that person is
like you stick like Barry Adam Sandler in the background.
Mm hmm.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
I was watching a video last night of you know,
people with their dogs, Like they're walking into the house
and then the dog pulls them and they just like
go flying, and I'm just I was literally dying. Oh my,
I love that kind of thing. I don't know why,
but I like.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Physical comedy is the best, so good, the best.
Speaker 1 (01:36):
Ridiculousness to me is the best.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
Oh my god, to.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
See people get her. I don't know why.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
I mean that was how I started my career and
Vine just getting hurt.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
Talking about Vine. If you could sit down with the
girl who started ten years ago and ye, yes, her
first one, what would you tell her about that journey
she's about to go on.
Speaker 2 (01:55):
You're gonna make Shakira. That's right, You're gonna make Shagara.
Gonna be really close with her and different, not too close,
but like just you're gonna enough. You're gonna be like,
no way, I don't believe him. I would like I
would tell her things that she's manifested, that they came true,
you know, because as time went on, I had different goals,
but I know the goals that I had when I
(02:16):
was on Vine, which was, you know, to dance Gasolina
like you know, the Shakira and and meet these people
and like so it's like that she would understand like,
for example, you're gonna be a mom, you're gonna be married,
You're going to I don't know, my god do dancing
with the stars, you know, like she at that moment,
I don't think. And every year there's something.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
You know, out of all the things you've been able
to accomplish, is there one that stands out is like, wow,
I can't believe I did that.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
Not that I can't believe I did that. There was
one moment in my career that I was like, I
definitely did something good in my career that this happened
when Will Smith when I met him for me, when
he was like, you were one of the reasons why
or you you know, inspired me to do videos you
I watched you just like you know, build your career.
(03:06):
I was like, I made it. I somehow influencer touched
such a great actor likes someone that I love actors
and I love directing and I love that. So that's
my world. I love that more than anything. So the
fact that as I'm seeing someone grew, like, you know,
(03:27):
in their career, they're looking back at me, that they're
also looking at me. It's like you never know who's watching.
And like for him to say that, you know how
many people can say it, but for him to say it,
I believe.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
It, you know, you know it's the I have a
crazy Will Smith story. So when I was a kid,
I was obsessed with bad boys, like to the point
that I went to the theater Wow, and I stole
the poster, Like they just stole. They had a huge
wall poster outside, you know the vinyls that they put
And I told my friend, and here's the thing, we're
gonna go, like right around two in the morning, nobody's
(03:59):
going to see me. And I took the wall poster
off the theater sur prisident never got arrested us, and I
put it on the back wall of my room.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
And my dream was always to work with Will Smith
and to have something to do with bad boys, so
much so that tiny one of the years, for my birthday,
he gave me an old VHS of Bad Boys and
I had it in my office and one day Will
Smith walks in and he asked me to manage him,
(04:34):
and I couldn't believe that. Like I was staring at him,
staring at the at the at the movie. I was like,
is this really happened? And I got the chance for
the past two years to spend time with him, and
there's so many of those moments. I think that's like
the highlight of my.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
Career, you see, like those like little moments that it's like, man,
I understand it because it was a dream of yours,
like you were you know what I mean, and then
somehow it becomes true. That's what you would say to
your younger self.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
I couldn't believe. And the first time actually that we met,
he was screening parts of the new movie for me
and so I would say, oh hi, Will, Oh my god.
He was wearing orange, which is meaningful color for me,
and I was like, this is a sign. But the
like we're about to go into the theater and I'm like,
I have to go to the bathroom and he's like, oh,
me too. So literally my first time is with Will
Smiths were like sh sh sh hi, what's up? Man?
(05:27):
You know, He's like, how's that piss? Going, it's going, well,
that's crazy. So that's an amazing thing about you know,
the career that we've choseness the opportunities to do these
things that just seemed like so far off. Yes, if
you look back in all the things that you've done
as well, which one has touched the most about yourself?
Speaker 2 (05:49):
When I did my documentary about mental health, I think
it touched me and I was happy to touch at
least one person, you know. Doing the documentary about the
secret I have pons on YouTube was something that, like,
you know, it's even if it wasn't like the biggest
for many people, or I think for me, it was
like it was very important, and it was in a
moment that not a lot in twenty eighteen, not a
(06:11):
lot of people were talking about mental health. It wasn't
like a thing you know now it's I love that,
it's like something that, like I hear a lot about
mental health and in your experience and being vulnerable. So
I think that's one of them. That's definitely one of them.
I think my YouTube videos with my friends, I mean
(06:31):
it's like it's it's just like, I my god, it's
just I had so much fun. There's nothing better than
doing something that you love.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
Do you feel like some of that once it turned
into a real business and you had to deliver and
continue to deliver.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
Has that when when something you know, it's crazy, when
something turns into a business, sometimes you might lose how
you started, which was just for fun, you know, because
it becomes a business and there's people involved and then.
But I really never lost that, you know, because of
the friends that I made in my YouTube Hannah Ann
(07:11):
or Rudy Shots, Nana, so many, so many people that
I h Thanks to them, I am where I am today.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
In your journey, you've been very outspoken. As you mentioned
at the beginning of the documentary of your mental health.
What do you think is the most misunderstood part about
dealing with mental health issues?
Speaker 2 (07:32):
You know what it is understanding? Let me explain why
if you're not going through it, people don't see it
as their problem. People don't understand. So I think that
for example, of you right now you're having an episode,
I'm here, I'm gonna be like, oh like usually people
will be like, oh my god, like what's gonna because
(07:53):
you're not living it. So my thing is like mental
health is real for the person it's super real, and
that's something that not a lot of people understand, so
they just kind of you as like you're crazy or
this everybody on the internet when they do something that
for people are like, oh my gosh, she's crazy. Probably
something's happening, bro, you know what I mean? And also
(08:17):
very important. I don't think that using mental health sometimes
for actions is some like, oh, it's not an excuse, right,
but it's an explanation. I think there's in many cases
it is an explanation. Why did you do that? I
was like, it's not an excuse, but let me explain
to you why I yelled when I when I didn't
have to yell, you know, but no excuse, don't use
(08:41):
it an excuse.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Doctor Saliz wrote a book about the power of differences,
and it was that in There's genius in what people
call disorders. Oh yeah, do you feel that these things
that you know have been mental health struggles for you
have also been your superpowers? Yes?
Speaker 2 (09:00):
Sure? Yeah, Because let's say this, if everything in your
life has been perfect, you don't fight, and fighting is
what keeps you going, what makes you grow. So if
everything's perfect handed to you, everything is great, how do
(09:21):
you live, you're not human like you know what I mean.
I feel like my mental health has made me get
up because I don't want to be my diagnose. I
don't want to. I want to be better than that,
you know, so I want to use that and be
something else. So I think it makes you stronger, But
obviously it depends on the actions you're going to take.
(09:42):
You know, many times, you know, I didn't want to
go to therapy. Many times I didn't want to take
my pills. And those times because I, you know, I
I I was responsible, things happened. Of course, because it's
a chemical imbalance. You know. Sometimes you know, you might
not don't even have anything, But if you don't talk
about maybe I don't know you have depression, you don't
(10:04):
talk about it, it's going to hit you. For everybody,
we live in a world that is it's it's very toxic.
This world is very, very toxic, and it's getting to
a point that being mean and hateful and everything, it's
it's like a thing now, you know. So I don't know,
it's just like it's a very lonely world. So you
(10:26):
got to talk about your problems.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
You got to do that. Yeah, motherhood, what has it
touched it so far?
Speaker 2 (10:34):
My god, Oh, motherhood. It is such a different love.
It is a love that I actually love to love
someone more than you, more than anything in the world.
You know, I like that. It's not I'm not the
(10:54):
center of my story anymore.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
I like that.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
I like that the main character. I'll be in the
main character too. But is this baby, because you're about
to teach a like a person, like a human everything,
and I love to help with that process. So for me,
motherhood is starting all over again, and for me the
(11:19):
most important role that you're ever going to have, because
you can be anything you want. But what are you
leaving behind. You're leaving behind your grand your grandchildren, your daughter,
your son, your legacy. You're humans, you know, even if
you don't even have to have a baby about like,
even if you touch it, it's like you help a
(11:40):
niece for example. You know, for me, is helping my
daughter grow and seeing how she evolves and how she
physically changes. It's the it's the best gift ever, even
when she was inside inside me. There's an app called
what to Expect when You're expecting and just knowing, like
(12:03):
this week you make the ears, this week you make
the vocal cords. I love that process. I love to
love something more than anything in the world, and I
generally cannot. It's scary. It is scary and overwhelming because
even me being here in New York and now with her,
it's like a part of me is like somewhere, Like
(12:24):
I like, I don't have an arm, Like something's like missing,
you know. And it's scary because it's not about you anymore.
Speaker 1 (12:31):
Yeah, But I like that.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
I like that feeling that is not about you. I
like that it's about her everything.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
You know. One of the things that I've learned about
fatherhood and I talk a lot about it in this show,
is it gave me compassion towards my parents.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
Oh my god, I have so much. I always have respect,
but I understand my mom more and I know what
she went through and I love her. I mean, I've
always loved her, but I respect love, understanding all these
stuff together at once. And I think about like like
(13:04):
I was a baby, you know, like I can't believe
that I'm alive. You know that she kept me alive.
Can you believe that, like your mom kept you alive
because you are so vulnerable, you don't know what's going
You can't even see right, You see blurry, and I'm
here because of her, and you start to see that more.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
And she did all that while trying to figure out
her own life. Yes, one of the things that I've
I've taken into fatherhood for myself is the best thing
I can do for my child is to better me,
because there'll be a better example. I can take her
mistakes in a better way. And Will says this famously
where he says, the best part of being a parent
(13:42):
is where you get to a stage that you can
tell your kids I don't know, but we're gonna figure
it out together. I love that. And I love that
because you know, especially as Latinos, there's this ego thing
that comes with being a parent where it's like no, no, no, no,
you're gonna listen to me. Okay, you're gonna go left
because I told you left. And the truth is, we
just don't know, right, We're all still trying to figure
(14:06):
it out. We're all in this battle of you versus
you every day.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
Yeah. I teach my parents a lot. Yeah, Oh isn't
that crazy?
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Gon' ass kids?
Speaker 2 (14:14):
Yeah, And I mean they taught me everything, but I
do teach my So I wonder what my daughter is
definitely going to teach me a bunch of stuff, you know,
So I'm excited about that too.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
I think that's that's the truth. I think they're here
to teach you, to give you a lesson. They're here also,
Like one of the things that my daughter taught me
right away was I'll never forget this. She was stuck
in the ballpin. She was about a year and a half.
She was like crying and my wife weren't running to
grab her, and I said, hey, just give her a second.
I just want to see what happens. No, but she's
(14:44):
trying not just wait. And there was a point where
my daughter just said, oh, they ain't coming, push herself
out like backflip out of the ballpin, and then kept
on playing. And I said, wow, the human brain has
a capacity to help you so your problems. Yeah, it's
just that we are so programmed to not want to
(15:05):
sit in the hard times. Do not want to be
in the fire, And in the fire is the lesson.
After that, she never cried again in evolvement because she
knew she could get out. Yeah, And I thought that
that was such a personal lesson for me because again,
historically you've been taught, Hey, you're going through a hard time,
don't worry the lights at the end of the tunnel. Yeah,
(15:26):
like get out, You're going to get out through it.
And it's like, how about if we just learned to
love to sit in the fire and learn to dance
in it and in that find the gold. And that
brings me to my next question. Fellow he said, would
ask you, mom, what's the hardest part of being you?
What would you tell her?
Speaker 2 (15:43):
I think the hardest thing about being me is accepting
when I'm wrong. We always want to be right. We
don't want to be wrong, you know, we don't want
to make mistakes and everything. But it's okay accepting that
I'm wrong, except that I need help, accepting that I
need to go to therapy, that I that, you know,
(16:04):
accepting that it's it's okay to not to be perfect.
It's okay, you know. That for me is you know,
and I feel like for many people, you know, we
don't want to be wrong. You know, it's like, damn,
I fucked up, you know, especially for a daughter, you know,
for I don't want to fuck up for her. I
don't want to make mistake because I want her to
be like, you know, see my mom as like, oh,
like I want to be yes. So when it comes
(16:26):
to her, that would be it.
Speaker 1 (16:27):
The biggest lesson Your mistakes has touched you that you
want to teach her, And what's the biggest lesson? Your
success has touched you that you want to teach her
every mistake.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
It's okay to make mistakes, but you have to learn
from every single mistake and be better. Prove yourself that
you are not your mistake. So I think that's very important.
I've made many mistakes, but I but every single mistake
has led me to become a better person. No mistake
(17:00):
that I've made has made me a worse person. And
success something that success has taught me to slow down.
Success has taught me to slow down because I've done
so many things. And when you're really successful, let's say that,
you know, you forget almost everything and you just remember
(17:20):
what you did last year or two years ago, three years.
And I've been in this for thirteen years and I
don't remember anything from my first six years.
Speaker 1 (17:27):
You know, that's an interesting concept because again another another
through line that I heard everybody that's here and I
can relate to. It is when you're in the run
of success, when you're in the midst of like your
world and you're building, you're living so much for the
next moment that you forget to live that moment. Don
(17:47):
the author of un Charged Journey. He says most humans
live the experience for what they're hoping the experience is,
or what tomorrow will be, then the experience itself. And
I love that because I think if there's one thing
that I've been really wanted to teach people about you
versus you is one, you know, you're you're your biggest enemy,
like you're in your head you have every superpower to
(18:09):
overcome anything, and you have every power to them your
life in your mind. Two, we don't actually control anything.
You don't control our next breath, let alone how many
times we overplanned something and it doesn't come out exactly
how we want, like, yeah, So releasing of that and
(18:30):
being able to take the moment just for what it is.
Speaker 2 (18:32):
Yeah. I do, though, believe that you do control your
actions and how you're going to move forward after you
know what I mean, Like, if you make a miss,
for example, you make if you make a mistake, if
you do something. You have the option. You know, are
you gonna you know, sit back and cry or are
you gonna walk out? You know, I do believe you
do have control of your action. You have no control
(18:53):
of anything, nothing.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
Other than yourself, other than your versus.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
Yes, it's just you, you verse. And I do want
to teach that to my daughter. That's why I'm saying,
you're gonna make mistakes. So where are you gonna go?
There's always like two paths, And I'll love you no
matter what.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
Oh, I would say more than ever. Kids grow up
today wanting to be at La punts right, wanting to
be either a streamer or a content creator. Yeah, there's
a little girl like you watching this and says, oh
my god, I love Lela. Why would be the three
advice that you would give her on her way up?
Speaker 2 (19:31):
I know this is so cliche of like me saying like, oh,
don't listen to haters. I would literally say, the bigger
you are, the more haters you're gonna get. Just have
that already in mind, all right, If you don't get hate,
you're not big, you know what I mean? Because I
feel like the like, look at Taylor Swift, My god,
you know, she even gets booted, but she's the biggest
(19:53):
and she will always be, you know, So have that
in mind already. If you're doing this because you want
to be famous and you want to be loved and
you want to be popular, don't you know, like, don't
do it for that, Do it because you really love it.
That's another thing I want to say, if you really
that you really love it, Because if you really love something,
you're not ever gonna get tired of it, you know,
because going into something depends on the reason or the
(20:15):
or your motives. What's going to make you like lasts
longer is if you're having a blast and you and
you even if like you have to take a break,
you don't even want to take a break, you know.
And that's the last thing that I want to tell
that that child is take a break. Even if everything's
going great, Oh you're on top of the world, take
(20:35):
a two week break, I swear to God, because if
you don't take a small break one you might lose yourself.
You might make mistakes because you're going too fast. Don't
go too fast. Be present, And you know, we always
have that moment that when so much is happening, you
lose yourself, you get a you have a meltdown. So
before you even even if it's everything's perfect, have a break.
(20:58):
My every every single time that I've made mistakes or
I've done bad choices or like a bad brand, not brand,
like a bad call on my career is because I
was going way too fast and I didn't take a break.
Speaker 1 (21:25):
One of the things that we talk about on the
show a lot is our brains are trying to make
decisions while sitting in a car listening to hard rock music.
That's your brain every single day. And we've been taught
this idea that the only way to succeed is hustling
harder than everybody else. And that's smarter.
Speaker 2 (21:45):
It's hustling smarter.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
I say, it's not one hundred percent of the shots
you don't take, it's one hundred percent of the shots
you don't see.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Work in silence. Work in silence that way. Privacy is
your power. It is partably And I'm a hypocrite because
everything is public for me. But trust me, Like the
people say, Adele, all these people that come out all
of a sudden, they're like Liddy Gaga, you know what
I mean, Like they don't have to announce everything. You know,
(22:15):
they're working, and then all of a sudden they pop
out doing like something that they've been working on for example.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
You know, Yeah, I think the challenge in a lot
of the conversations with a lot of successful people, the
challenge is always learning to stay still doing you learn
to be a doer, and standing still is where you
listen when you hear. And I really have learned that
in my own personal life that the idea that we
earn something, or the idea that it's our hard work
(22:43):
who gets to something, and we realize that it's all
a gift. We're good shepherds of that gift, and we
can put discipline and but I really encourage people to
generally learn how to stand still and let give your
brain an opportunity to be able to hear, to get clarity,
and to be able to see. I really believe that.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
And it's not a waste of time. It's actually gonna
save you more time because you're going to use your
time wisely, you know, if you take if you do that,
I do completely agree with them.
Speaker 1 (23:13):
I had Charlie walk here yesterday, who worked you know,
famously with Taylor Shift throughout her whole career.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
I know him.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
He said something that I thought was really great. He said,
Taylor understands that her fans are the boss, and she
works really hard at pleasing her boss and storytelling to
her boss. Do you agree with that in your case?
Speaker 2 (23:32):
Yeah, I mean I think, you know, like her doing
like the East Easter eggs, you know, that's how you
call it. That's for the fans. She does extra she
she she makes them like it's entertaining because they're kind
of a part of it, you know. There is probably
like the boss like she like, they work together, you know.
(23:54):
And I like also the fact that, let me tell you,
she probably does take breaks, you know what I mean,
And in those breaks she's at home silence, you know
what I mean. She's never like I'm pretty sure that
who posts for her on social media as somebody, you know.
Like I mean, if you give everything to people, almost
nothing is yours, you know what I mean. Like every
when you put something out, it belongs to the rest
(24:17):
of the world, you know. So it's good to be
a little bit back because people like mystery people let
people miss you, you know, because if you're always on
their faces, they get tired.
Speaker 1 (24:34):
Sometimes, I think that's one of the hardest things for me,
you know, in the era of social media, is this
idea of kind of giving every part Because I'm such
an introretet I enjoy like nobody knowing I have like
the same five friends my whole life. I don't like associate.
So one of the hardest things, like with my team
is like, but you got to do content, but you
(24:56):
gotta do this, but you gotta. I found it to
be something that I really really stro. If you can
give me anyatives, what would they be in activating my
social media presence?
Speaker 2 (25:07):
Like you want me to give you a tip of
how to become bigger onto the.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
Media, how to just be comfortable with social media?
Speaker 2 (25:15):
I would say, be your audience? What would if you
were your audience? What would you like to see? When
I pose on social media, I think of like what
would if I was someone that would follow me? What
would I like to see? You know what I mean?
That's why I've been able to Okay, I started on
vine I was sixteen years old. Okay, well they're growing
(25:37):
with me. Do they want to see me come? Always
be the same girl? No, Like, you have to choose
a path, you have to show everybody where you're going
through because their fat they're going with you, they're growing
up with you. So you know, you go, you move
for the first time to your apartment, your first job,
you change friends, you find a guy, you get married,
(25:59):
you have advocate. I mean, it doesn't have to be
like that, but like being able to tell a story
with your experience is something that I would follow you
for that, you know, not did.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Write that down in the journal. Let's talk about your childhood.
So you left Venezuela, came to the US. How was
that experience?
Speaker 2 (26:20):
It was very hard because I came in an age
where I was starting to talk, you know what I mean.
And from the age of let's say two to five
and a half, almost six, Yeah, five and almost six,
you already started to talk. You haven't gotten to school yet,
so imagine, okay, I'm good at talking and communicating. Now
(26:44):
you're gonna go to a school that does not speak Spanish.
So I'm like, how do I communicate with my friend?
There's my first day of school and I don't even
know how to communicate with anybody because nobody in my
school talked English, I mean Spanish. So that for me
was the challenge. If I had left, for example, maybe
a lot older, for example, after like you know, because
(27:06):
they also teach you it's English, you know, in school.
But if either had left, let's say maybe at two
or three, you know, I would have been better like
communicating in school, or if I left later also, but
I was there in the like the first day of
school was in a school that I did not know
how to talk and also had just learned, you know,
(27:27):
the communica. I was five, so it was hard.
Speaker 1 (27:30):
Yeah, those those first I went through the same thing,
but I was a little older. I got to the
US when I was seven. I'm not that older talking
about like I get in and I remember the first
day of school because I had I remember her name.
Her name was Miss Brown, and she she was trying
to teach easel. And I had a bunch of kids
(27:54):
that were Portuguese in my class, so they didn't even
speak Spanish on top of that, so I was like god,
only Spanish speaking and other six classmates were Portuguese, and
I was trying to have a conversation with them. So
because I couldn't communicate, I would just draw. And I
remember I got like my first question a girl and
she was Portuguese, and I would draw like a miky
mouse and send it to her and be like, you know,
(28:15):
but I those moments are hard. I think, you know,
we underestimate the shock that it does to a kid
to learn that.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
Yes, especially because you know, if you know you're moving
to let's say America or somewhere anywhere Italy, your mom
and your dad they start prepping you or talking. Mine
was just we moved from one day to another for
family reasons. Yeah, do you get what I mean?
Speaker 1 (28:38):
Same.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
I hadn't even know we were moving. They told me,
like when we arrived, like in Miami, they were like,
this is going to be our home. You're starting school
in like a month, okay, Like you know, so they
didn't prep you. It was not I wasn't prepped. And
in the same year that I moved to Miami and
I was already feeling lonely, my father and my mom separated,
(29:01):
so I had no friends, Like I didn't know how
to speak in my in my high school and my
in my kindergarten, and my parents separated, you know what
I mean? And I had problem mentally I didn't know yet,
you know. Oh, CD, for example, was a big, big
one that I had, so everything came together, you know.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
So, yeah, that culture shock. Similar to your story. I
came from one day to the next, and I came
from living a life in Columbia that was like privileged.
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Oh my god, yes, I had last I remember my life,
my life, yeah, in.
Speaker 1 (29:36):
This little apartment, and I remember my mom having to
start frying food to sell at the airports. And I
would go to school or Lino like straight fang. And
to this day it's something that like, I hate smelling
like food. It's like the one if the place smells
like food when I walk into the.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
Yeah, you know that sometimes what you go through when
you're young, Yeah, it kind of you don't know why,
but it kind of like.
Speaker 1 (30:03):
Yeah, it creates a neumal path in your brain that
teaches your identity or this trauma.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
That you will deal with and you don't even know
until you talk to a therapist and you go like, ah,
I remember that.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
That's why I'm like, this is there a part of
your childhood you're still dealing with.
Speaker 2 (30:19):
This is horrible, but like, well, not horrible, but a
validation by some other people, which is a big mistake
because I really wanted to have friends. I started to
be like the physical comedy clown of the school my
grade because I wanted you know, people to like, oh, like,
you know, invite me to stop because she's a funny one,
so do. And I remember there was this one girl
(30:42):
that was like, oh, she's like she would invite me
because she either they were laughing with me or laughing
at me, but she would be like, oh, like let
it do something funny. She would literally say that. She
would be like, let it do something funny for us
like that, you know, because I wanted friends so badly
because I was an only child. Also, you know, my
parents were you know, separated, new school, everything. So I
(31:06):
was like, okay, well I don't know how to communicate,
so I'm just gonna be like funny or like fall
I don't know, you know. So as an early age,
I was trying to fit in by you know, comedy
or something or you know, being like a validate. Also,
when your parents separated, you don't even know why. After
I knew why, I was like, my god, this my
(31:27):
dad like not love me, you know, like obviously he did,
but he didn't tell me the reason why in that moment,
which I think he should have, you know, but for
years I never knew why. So in my mind as
a six year old, I didn't understand. So I was like,
oh my god, I hope they like me this person
like nah, you know. So it followed me to like
(31:48):
even social media. Many things that we do in social
media is because like, oh my god, like I'm gonna
post this, I wonder how many you know likes it's
gonna happen, you know what I mean? But I didn't.
The good thing is like in Vine, I actually did
it for myself, you know, because in Vine in my
high school, nobody really like I was. I was not
(32:09):
like you know, and I just did Vine because there
are so many weird people on Vine that were doing
the same thing. I felt like connected that I wanted
to become friends with them, so I collabed with them,
but it wasn't a thing. So I think that's also
helped me.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
Does that part of you manifest and other things outside
of social media that do you feel like when you're
in your personal relationship? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (32:32):
Yeah, sometimes yeah, I mean sometimes yeah. With relationships and
you and my husband, it's like it's like literally like
I know you did it, Like I see the work
are you doing or something I don't know. It could
be like did you see like my hair and everything?
He's like, yeah, I told you, like I saw it.
I love it. And I was like, yeah, but but
but did you see that I did something different? You know,
like I know I saw it. You know. It's like
it's like the constant need of just like yeah, like
(32:56):
be validated. I don't know. Yeah, but that's not that
is a problem.
Speaker 1 (33:00):
By the way, It's really interesting, right. I had doctor
Gail Saltz yesterday, who's a psychiatrist who studies the power
in differences, right, and most of us were driven by
these hurts, by these things that make us so different.
Speaker 2 (33:14):
Right.
Speaker 1 (33:15):
Yes, And I would say one hundred out of one
hundred people that have sat on that chair where you're sitting,
I've struggled with the same, struggle with the same I
think as a society, we struggle with not feeling enough
because we're programmed every day to not feel enough. Right.
Like that's how I sell you a really expensive jacket
by saying, if you don't have the expensive jacket, you
know it look really good. Yeah, but it is something
(33:37):
that affects everyday life because you filter all the information
that's happening around you.
Speaker 2 (33:42):
And yes, even if people say something to you like oh,
like you're this, you're that, you're sometimes you don't believe it,
you know, and that's a problem. That's why for me
when when Will Smith told me that, I believed it
because who are you? You're not my mom? You know.
Their mom's always.
Speaker 3 (34:03):
One of the first people that I studied when I
wanted to do social media. I was like, she is
magical and how you could make the beginning, middle and
end in sixteen seconds was just like spectacular.
Speaker 2 (34:20):
And I respect you and admire you so much that
you're not a you don't bullshit. So it was one
of the first time that I was like, I mean,
I guess I am you know.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
So that's why let's talk about love. What was the
hardest part about finding someone to truly give yourself to
with fame, with the acclaim, with kind of your lifestyle.
Speaker 2 (34:43):
Too, is trust because when you're famous, or even when
you're rich, famous, popular, whatever you have, the famous, well
you really you have a thing of like why are
you with me? Why are you with me? Because like
there's a lot of beautiful, amazing people, there's not that
many and you know you might have something that they want,
(35:06):
you know, so it's first, I would say, patients get
to know, don't go straight into it. Like I when
I met my husband right now, we were together. We
were never together at the beginning. It took us like
a year to actually be together, you know, and we
even like he went this way, I went that way.
So when I found out he wanted me for me
(35:28):
because you know, like I don't want anything from you
and I don't want it, and he didn't want anything
for me, That's when I started the relationship there, you know,
but you know I was holding like, you know, study
the person first, because you have to protect yourself so
much in this in this world period. You have to
protect yourself because I want to go into a relationship
(35:51):
not with the mentality of like, well I just want
to go on this and maybe we end up together,
we don't. I don't care. No, I don't want to
waste time. So if I'm gonna let myself be with
someone and let that person in, is because that person's
going to stay.
Speaker 1 (36:05):
No, I feel I feel the same. I mean, I
think for me, the hardest part historically was that like
just finding someone that I could that I would trust
enough because I love hard. That's the thing.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Like I wear my heart in my sleeve, and I
don't want to cry, you know, I don't.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
Yeah, and I definitely don't want to cry. So what's
the biggest lesson he's taught you?
Speaker 2 (36:24):
A big lesson that Guana has taught me is to
embrace your imperfections because he loves my imperfections. So if
he loves it, and he told me, you know, yeah,
but look how you do this. I know it's not perfect,
but it's look at how fun, you know, Like some
he gives me examples of what he likes that I
don't like about myself. But I'm like, well, actually you
(36:44):
put it.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
That way, you know, sounds pretty good.
Speaker 2 (36:46):
Yeah, So to love your imperfections.
Speaker 1 (36:48):
I love that. What's your relationship with Fame? Do you
like it?
Speaker 2 (36:52):
Do you honestly like? It's my I think it's my responsibility.
If you know, I chose this life. I chose it.
I could have walked out, So I have to be
okay with where comes at me and I can leave
any time I want, you know. And if I'm still
here is because I love to do videos and everything
Fame came with what happened because I did do Vine
(37:12):
when it was not there was no word for influencer.
I did not you think Vine famous, like, you know,
I didn't know what that meant. But I loved doing
what I did so much, and I started growing, growing, growing,
And it wasn't like a thing like, oh, I got
a million followers in a year. No, no, no, it
was very slow. It took me like four years to
(37:32):
get a million, you know, like it was just so
so because I loved doing what I was doing, and
you know, not a lot of people understood it. So
with that came fame, right, and I loved it because
I loved the fame because of the people that I met,
for example, Will Smith, Adrian Brodi, Paris Hilton. I love
meeting people that I admire, for example, I love from
(37:53):
fame because it's a beautiful world that I've grown up
with and I'm privileged to be in the same room
with so many people that I love because I do
love movies and shows and music, so that I do
things and also like the things like that. It gives
you with opportunities as well. But it's just also it's
(38:13):
very lonely sometimes because the comments get to you. You know,
you don't want to tell it like and it's embarrassing
to be like, I don't like this guy told me
that I'm this and this, you know what I mean?
Like you want to be strong, like you know, like
I promise you that I've seen so many bad comments
and you don't even know who the person is. You
know that person left a long time ago. It's like
(38:34):
in the weird names you know, like Alex five four
three two that you know like who. So it is
it is tough because you get lost and like you,
sometimes you become a character. You don't even become yourself.
And I've seen that with friends of mine and I
saw it with me. I became the character that I
was playing in my videos and that wasn't me. So
(38:56):
when I go back to Miami, my family is like,
why are you talking like that? Talk normal? And that's
something from fame that scares me is that you, without
knowing become fake version of yourself that you created.
Speaker 1 (39:09):
For you know, for people talking about identity, where do
you feel the most comfortable being you? It's it at home?
Is it in front of the camera? Like where have
you been able to find that comfort of saying, okay,
this is the most developed version of myself because I
know for like you said, in our business, I created Lex.
(39:30):
Lex is the music executive, really successful manager, but myself,
which is what I'm now learning more and more through
this process of you versus you to separate is a
kid who loves cars, who like sings in the shower,
who's like, who's the complete opicer of people get intimidated
(39:51):
by meeting me in this side and I am like
the complete opposite human.
Speaker 2 (39:55):
I mean when I get drunk, you see the yeah right, no, no, no,
But I think directing my videos and making content that
I love, not for brandios, not for a reality show,
not for anything or script or anything. Every video that
I do on Instagram, on TikTok is me. It is
(40:18):
really me. It's a way I communicate. I don't even
talk sometimes, it's just a way to communicate, and that
is me. I love comedy, I love being relatable, right.
I love to do that, and I like to be creative.
I like the creativity. You know. I think that, and
then I think that me at home, me and me
(40:40):
at home and me with my friends. I'm I've learned
to be just really real with them with close friends
from my childhood, it was all.
Speaker 1 (40:50):
Said and done tomorrow, what message would you want to
leave to humanity if.
Speaker 2 (40:55):
Everything was done? Be better? Like, be better next time,
because there's a reason why the humanity is gone, for
it to happen, for humanity to be completely outs because
we did something. So let's find out what we did
so the next time the next humans come, they don't
go through what we're about to go through.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
You know, words have power, and we talk a lot
about on this show that while we're a lot more
kind to other people, we're really hard to ourselves.
Speaker 2 (41:24):
Yeah, worst enemies.
Speaker 1 (41:27):
What is one word that Lela needs to hear in
order to win her battle of you versus you today?
Speaker 2 (41:36):
One word unbreakable. I think that's one word that I
can describe myself. And there's a I don't know what movie,
but there's a there's something that my mom and everybody
always tells me, and I think it's a very famous
call that says this shall pass. Where was that movie
for this too shall pass? Yes, because you don't see
(41:59):
it in that moment, but it's but it does everything.
Speaker 1 (42:05):
Everything passes will famously says it and over until it's over,
and if you're still alive, then that means it was
not over. Let thank you for being part of you
versus You. I love that conversation. Thanks for making time,
and let this be the first of many. Thank you
You Versus You as a production of Me on sixteen
(42:27):
and Entertained Studios in partnership with the Iheartmichael to that
podcast network For more podcasts, listen to the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
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