Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if
you need advice and relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry Letter to STEVEVARVFM dot com and
click submit Strawberry Letter Now. Before we actually get to you,
nephew and the letter, I want to ask everybody to
come and join me. This Saturday, October fourth. I will
(00:20):
be in Chicago, that is my hometown. I'll be there
for the ninth annual celebration, Sister Strutt. It's the Pink
Celebration and honor of breast cancer Awareness. Put on your pink,
ladies and gentlemen, come on out to the Salvation Army
Ray and Joan Krop Community Center at twelve fifty West
(00:40):
one hundred and nineteenth Street in Chicago on the South Side.
It's at ten am sharp. I will be there and
I would love it if you would come and join me.
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
That's it.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
Who go ahead, net?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Who cool? Cool? All right? Welcome up? A hold on tight,
we got it for you here. It is Strawberry.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
Let us all right, nephew, thank you. Subject and I
think he lied about leaving me. Dear Stephen Shirley, my
husband and I are in a long distance marriage. We
have been married for eighteen years, and he moved in
with his mother back in his hometown two years ago.
He said it would be temporary, but his mom's health
(01:18):
did not improve until recently. I didn't move with him
because our daughter wanted to finish high school with her friend.
He only came home a few times to visit us
after he moved. The last time he came home was
in June for our daughter's graduation, and he was very
distant and he acted like a guest in our home. Recently,
on Facebook, I saw pictures of him and his mother
(01:41):
out at church and at a Labor day outing. I
told him that if his mom is doing a lot better,
then maybe he should come back home, because it's lonely
without our daughter at home with me. He said his
mom's health is not better and she has good days
and bad days. I told him I was coming to
visit his mom and maybe that would help her feel better.
(02:02):
He said that I should wait until closer to the
holidays and he'll come see me and bring his mom.
I didn't like that response, so I booked a flight
to see him. I went straight to his mom's house
and I saw a first sale sign in the front yard.
I called my husband and he said that he would
come pick me up. It took him an hour to
(02:23):
get there, and he took me to a hotel. He
said that he and his mom are living in a
small apartment because there was mold in her house. He
said she was having a bad day, so it's best
that I stay at the hotel. When he left me
at the hotel, I took a taxi to the airport
and I left town. I think he left me intentionally,
(02:45):
but blamed it on his mom's health. It's been two
weeks since I went to his hometown and I haven't
heard from him. Is my marriage over? Yes, yes it is.
This is a case of too much, too little, too late.
And as a matter of fact, I'm going to ask
you this what marriage. This is clearly not any type
(03:06):
of union, partnership, situationship, any type of relationship. It's not
even a friendship. At this point, your husband is gone.
He is gone, and he lives with his mom. Period.
That's the end of this story. When and if he
does come home, quote unquote, you say he acts like
a guest in his own house. This man has checked
(03:27):
out of this marriage and whatever he's got going on
out of town, that is where his heart is, out
of sight, out of mind. As it pertains to you,
what have you, guys done to keep this marriage strong? Nothing?
For your part? What did you do you let this
go on for so long? I mean, this happened two
years ago. Why didn't you question it then? Why didn't
(03:49):
you and your daughter go visit him? Why didn't you
stay at the house. Why you know, are you at
a hotel? Why couldn't his mom come and stay with
you guys for a while? I mean, is he and
the only child? These are so many questions that I have.
Does he have another family?
Speaker 2 (04:05):
There?
Speaker 1 (04:05):
None of this is making sense to me. So to
answer your original question, is your marriage over?
Speaker 2 (04:11):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (04:11):
Your marriage is over?
Speaker 3 (04:13):
Steeve, Yeah, it ain't in the words or in the
way Charles White would say, yeah, yeah, you don't have
a marriage. I think he lied about leaving me. I
don't even know how that's the title of the letter.
Which part of this you ain't see? Because it's the
whole letter is clear. So I'm trying to figure out
(04:35):
what part of the letter when you was typing it
that you didn't see let's walk through it. My husband
now are in a long distance marriage. Okay, I've heard
of long dis relationship, So a marriage is a relationship.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
It can happen. We've been married for eighteen years.
Speaker 3 (04:52):
He moved in with his mother back in his hometown
two years ago. He said it would be temporary, but
his mom's health did not improve until recently. I didn't
move with him because our daughter wanted to finish high
school with her friends. He only came home a few
times to visit after he moved.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
All right, did you get all that?
Speaker 3 (05:13):
He only came to visit a few times after he moved.
Keyword visit. When you go home, you don't visit, You
just go back home. So he only visited two times. No,
he didn't come back home. That's the part you miss it.
He didn't came home. The last time he came home
(05:36):
was in June for our daughter's graduation. See now you're
trying to interject home. No, listen, the last time he
visited was in June for our daughter's graduation. And he
was very distant, and he acted like a guest in
our home. That's because it's not his home.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
He just visiting.
Speaker 3 (05:56):
That's why he acts strange because he was. He's already
checked out. It's a whole nother family somewhere. I don't
know how you don't see this. It's a whole. It's
a girl involved. This ain't your mama. No, no, this
is not about his mama. That mammy is sick anyway,
you said. Recently on Facebook, I saw pictures of him,
(06:17):
he and his mother out at church and at a
labor day out. I told him if his mom was
doing a lot better, then maybe he should come back
home because it's lonely without our daughter at home with me.
He said, his mom's health ain't better. That's right, it
ain't better. On We was just went to church to
get prayer. I had to take her back home. She
(06:38):
was sick right after that.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
Hang up. We'll have part two of your response coming
up to Steve at twenty three minutes.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
Churches for Sick People.
Speaker 1 (06:45):
Today's Strawberry Letters. Subject is I think he lied about
leaving me. We'll get back into it right after this.
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Speaker 1 (07:29):
All right, come on, Steve, Let's recap today's strawberry letter.
The subject is I think he lied about leaving me.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
This woman is delusional. She wrote a letter that has
evidence all the way through it.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
She don't see.
Speaker 3 (07:42):
Then, A long distant relationship, a long distance marriage. Long
diess relationships happen all the time, a marriage's relationship. So
I can deal with that one right there. He moved
back to his hometown two years ago because mama was
sick and he went to help take care of it.
You didn't move because your daughter wanted to finish high
school with a friend, so you stayed in town. Now,
he only came to visit a couple of times in
(08:04):
two years then because he was just visiting. And then
you said the last time he came home, No no, no, no,
don't stay home. See because when you came, when you
said he came to visit. When you come home, you
don't visit, you go home. Then the next thing you
said was he came home to our daughter's graduation. No no, no, no,
(08:25):
he came back to visit, and he was acting strange
and distant. That's cause he don't stay that no more.
See what part of is you'll see. Then recently on Facebook,
you saw pictures of here and his mama out at
church and at a labor day outing. Then you said, well,
since your mama feeling better, maybe you can come on
back home, because it's lonely here with the daughter gone.
(08:48):
He said, mama not doing better. We just went to
church and to the barbecue or labor day. Soon as
we went to church, she.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
Got sick at the church. I had take her home.
Speaker 3 (09:01):
Then when she got better, I tried to take her
to get some barbecue at the labor day and shake
the barbecue.
Speaker 2 (09:06):
Got sick again.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
Was that how it happened?
Speaker 2 (09:11):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (09:13):
So then you said, well, maybe if you come and
visit her mom, it'll make her feel better. My mama
don't even like you. You gonna make her sick off.
He said, no, just wait till she feel better. Then
I'm gonna bring her to see you at the holidays.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (09:34):
I didn't like that response, so I booked a flight
to see him. I went straight to his mom's house
and saw a false sale sign in the front yard.
I called my husband. He said he would come pick
me up. It took him an hour to get that,
and he took me to a hotel. He said, he
and his mom is living in a small apartment because
that was mold in her house.
Speaker 2 (09:54):
Come on, boy, come on, come through.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
Life.
Speaker 2 (09:58):
Boy.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
That's that's one right there. That's one right there. So
now you're gonna sell the mold infested house? Is you
gonna put that on the disclosure farm? Are you gonna
tell the people that is? But see, he can't take
you there because him and his mama don't live in
no apartment. The mama lives somewhere else. He getting the
(10:20):
money so he can help the mama sell the house
and make some profit and move him and his girl
to a new place that he got. See it's a
girl in here. You don't stay away from sex for
two years to help your mama. You don't that ain't
what you do.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
He can't.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
He can't. He can't do that. Two years with our sex,
we wouldn't even have teeth. We to grind them all down.
No sexual too easy, I'd be blind.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
Anyway.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
He said, him and his mama live in a small apartment. No,
his mama that moved into a small apartment. He lived
over there with a girl. And then you said, and
then you said, you want to go over there and
see her. He said she was having a bad day,
so it's best that I stay at the hotel. When
he left me at the hotel, I took a taxi
(11:19):
to the airport and I left town.
Speaker 2 (11:21):
That's right, girl, you show it.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
I think he left me intentionally, but blamed it on
his mom's health. It's been two weeks since I went
to his hometown, and I ain't heard from him.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
It's my marriage over.
Speaker 3 (11:33):
If your husband ain't called you in two weeks, if
your husband ain't scared to miss a date, I can't listen.
I cannot not call my wife for a date. You
ain't that busy partner. He done went two weeks. You
(11:54):
got in that taxi went right back to the airport.
It's been two weeks and you ain't heard from him.
Is our marriage over? Your marriage was over when he
went to stay with him, Mama, your marriage was over
when he came to visit you and your daughter for
a graduation, and he was actually strange and just he
had been checked out. Now, what your move is is
(12:18):
to get this divorce or you can live your best life,
because right now it's not a good life.
Speaker 2 (12:25):
Why would you want a man that don't want you? Why?
Speaker 3 (12:32):
See, I've wanted a woman that didn't want me before,
probably work probably fifteen twenty maybe twenty five of them.
That's been at least fifteen twenty five women I thought
was fining. Hell didn't won't have had nothing to do with me.
I clearly, I clearly have been that dog. But you're
(12:57):
sitting up in here. Why would you.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
Want man that don't want you?
Speaker 1 (13:04):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (13:05):
It all started back within that Bielbs when she told me, no,
I'm not going to the junior prom with you. I
asked her why she started for because I don't like
your facial features.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
And that's when hoodlist started right here. And you you
have a story too, you just don't want to tell us.
Speaker 1 (13:30):
Leave your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 2 (13:32):
I know you had one, you got one recently.
Speaker 1 (13:35):
And Facebook and Steve Harvey FM and check us out
on the Strawberry Letter podcast.
Speaker 3 (13:39):
And you was over in the hospital and that lady
said shut your little up and sports.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
Talk right after this, Hey us up, God, this is fantasia.
Speaker 4 (13:48):
Right now, you're listening to my man, the Steve Harvey
Morning Show.
Speaker 1 (13:52):
You're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show.