February 5, 2025 • 13 mins
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry Letter to STEVEARVFM dot com and
click submit Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
We could be reading your letter live on the air.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
Just like we're going to read this one right here,
right now, and you never know, it could be yours.
Speaker 3 (00:20):
It could be yours. Buckle up and hold on type
guide it for you. Here it is Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Thank you nephew. Subject. If I don't do it, he
will leave me. Dear Stephen Shirley. I'm twenty nine and
my husband is thirty, and we got married four months ago.
Our wedding was won for the books, and he was
perfect until two months ago when he tried to have
sex with me three times in one day. After he proposed,
(00:47):
I spoiled him more and we started having sex once
a day. That was great, and we learned a lot
about each other sexually, but I was terrified because we
are not ready to be parents yet. After the wed
he expected sex morning and night daily. I tried to
keep up, but I had anxiety and anxiety over not
(01:08):
being on any birth control and his refusal to use protection.
He said he didn't care about having a house full
of kids, but there's no way we can have a
baby with our current finance, with our current salaries. Things
got so bad that he started taking my clothes off
as soon as I got in from work. I'm worried
about getting pregnant, so I cannot concentrate what's going on.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
What's going on.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
Luckily for me and my sanity, our lease was up,
so I have been staying with my mother for the
past two weeks and he's been staying with his mom.
My mom lectured me about not staying with my husband
for two weeks, but I told her I need a break.
She has always advised me to give it up when
he wants it and wherever he wants it. She said
(01:54):
that's how she was married for twenty nine years. I
decided to tell my husband exactly how how I'm feeling.
His response was just like my mom's. He said that
as his wife, I'm supposed to please him, and if
I don't enjoy sex like he does, then we don't
need to stay married. I don't like how he said
(02:14):
that to me, but I get it. I'm willing to
compromise with him. But if I fall short on the
amount of sex he gets, will he cheat? Am I
a newlywed fool?
Speaker 3 (02:25):
Wow?
Speaker 2 (02:26):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (02:28):
I don't think you're a newlywed fool, but you are
a newlywed and there are adjustments to be made. You, guys,
have only been married four months, and you know, you
got to kind of learn each other. And by the way,
you are his wife and not his properties, not just
what he says goes. You have a say in this
(02:48):
marriage and the sex and all of that, just like
he does. But instead you're running from him because he
wants sex three times a day or at least morning
and night, and you're not always with that your body
and he does not own you just because you're married
to him. You are right to be concerned about getting
pregnant if you're not ready, and especially if you, guys,
(03:09):
can't afford it. Your husband is controlling in this situation.
He's not considering you or your feelings and why you
feel the way you do. But here is the question,
is the only reason you're running from his constant sexual demands?
Is it because you're not on birth control and he
won't help by using protection himself. Now, that's where a
(03:32):
compromise comes in. You gotta work. You guys got to
try and work these things out. Why should the birth
control be just on you? He could wear condoms. I
know he said he wasn't, but he should. If you
guys aren't ready to get pregnant yet, you guys are
newly ways. I would hate to see you break up
over this sex thing. I really would, because he wants
(03:53):
more than you do. So I think you should please
leave your mom's house so you and your husband can
have a serious talk about this of your four year,
four month marriage. It's just not looking good right now,
this whole marriage between you guys, it's not looking good. Steve.
Speaker 4 (04:09):
The subject is if I don't do it, he will
leave me. My answer to this letter is he gone.
It's hard to pick which bump to talk to you about.
But the bump you don't want to discuss is having
a baby. Was a bump up in sex. See hear
what happened? They had a wedding, she twenty nine. He
thought they had a wedding. That was one for the books,
(04:31):
she said, But sting started after two months ago. Now
what happened was see after he proposed she said, I
spoiled him more, and we started having sex once a day. See,
once she got the ring and a commitment, she said.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
Let me lock it in.
Speaker 4 (04:55):
By spoiling him more.
Speaker 3 (04:58):
All right, so spall game went in.
Speaker 4 (05:02):
Now they getting married, he's expecting that same spailing to continue.
As a matter of fact, he picking up the pace.
He wanted morning, night, afternoon.
Speaker 3 (05:18):
Now.
Speaker 4 (05:18):
And she said that was great because they learned a
lot about each other sexually and everything.
Speaker 3 (05:23):
But after the wedding he wanted it daily. She said.
I tried to keep up, but I.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
Had anxiety over not being on birth control and his
refusal to use protection. I don't even know how this
how we have in this discussion after the marriage, all
this birth control and protection, all that should have been covered.
If y'all having sex once a day, y'all ain't had
this conversation nowhere, and then you not on birth control,
(05:56):
and then he won't use a condom.
Speaker 3 (06:01):
I thought, excuse me, was after you married?
Speaker 4 (06:05):
I thought, most married people I know have unprotected sex.
Speaker 3 (06:10):
That's most people I know.
Speaker 4 (06:12):
But due to birth control, somebody's got to practice some
type of birth control measures.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
Right?
Speaker 3 (06:17):
Should it always be on the woman? Absolutely?
Speaker 4 (06:19):
Not so it should be on him, but he don't
want to wear that and not Now y'all got a problem.
But he told you I don't care about having a
house full of kids.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
Everybody say that to Hassei.
Speaker 2 (06:33):
Hang on, hang on, yeah, Hodie, till you.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
Get a house full of kids.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
I'm killing right.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
Well that part two of Steve's response coming up on
today's Strawberry Letter at twenty three minutes after the hour.
The subject is if I don't do it, he will
leave me. We'll get back into it right after this. Hi,
this is Shirley Strawberry. And I don't know if you
know this, but I love my job. I love working
(06:59):
with Steve, Eve, and Tommy and Junior and Carla and
Monica and Dave. Of course I love all those guys.
We have a great time at work every day. Well,
if you're a business owner and you want to hire
experienced employees who love what they do too, where do
you find them? Could be a question you had. Well,
Zip recruiter is the answer. Ziprecruiters technology shows your job
(07:20):
to qualified candidates immediately, and ZipRecruiter smart technology finds top
talent fast. Go to ZipRecruiter dot com, slash Strawberry to
try it for free that ZipRecruiter dot com slash Strawberry.
All right, come on, Steve, let's recap today's Strawberry letter.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
The subject is if I don't do it, he will
leave me.
Speaker 4 (07:40):
This letter is just about a woman and a man
that's married. She's twenty nine thirty and they have a
difference of opinion on how much sex to have. After
the man proposed to her, she picked a pace up
and they was having sex daily after they got married.
He wanted morning and night. She's having anxiety and he's
saving some anxiety over it because she don't want to
get pregnant, and because cause of their salaries, she don't
(08:01):
think this is the right time. He done said just
to have sex, I don't care. We have a house
full of kids. Well, homie, that's a nice statement to make.
But he They even had a TV show that said
eight years enough. I have a saying if you got fold,
(08:23):
why would you want more? We could do that TV show.
Then there's a new series coming out called too It's Plenty,
And then there's the mega hit show that's coming out.
I don't want the ones I got, So you know,
it's a lot that can't go on in here. So
(08:43):
now she started having anxiety over this. But they don't
want to have babies now here the thing where it
took a turn. Things got so bad. He started taking
my clothes off as soon as I got in from work. Damn,
you can do that, get a break. I had to
read that line five or six times. Really, he started
(09:06):
taking my clothes offs soon as I got.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
In from work. You can do that. You can go
over to your wife and just take her closer.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
What he's too controlling.
Speaker 3 (09:18):
Hold of damp.
Speaker 4 (09:19):
You can just walk up to your wife and start
taking her clothes off.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
I didn't even put her purse down yet.
Speaker 3 (09:27):
What is mad jack?
Speaker 4 (09:29):
It's every dude listening to this going what. Luckily for
me and my sanity, our least was up. So I've
been staying with my mama for the past two weeks,
and he been staying with his mom. My mom lectured
me about not staying with my husband for two weeks,
but I told her I need a break. She's always
(09:53):
advised me giving up whenever he wanted, wherever he wanted.
She said, that's how she married for twenty nine years.
Speaker 3 (10:03):
Give it up whenever and wherever. He won't it. Where
is this marriage at?
Speaker 4 (10:12):
You can take her clothes off soon as you come
through the door, and you can get it whenever and
wherever you want it.
Speaker 3 (10:18):
Where is this marriage? I ain't get the memo.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
What I'm sitting.
Speaker 3 (10:27):
This letter is astonishing to me. Now here we go.
Speaker 4 (10:32):
I decided tell my husband exactly how I'm feeling. So
his response was, just like your mama, He said that
as your his wife, I'm supposed to please him.
Speaker 3 (10:47):
That's true, but he is supposed to please you too.
Speaker 4 (10:52):
And if I don't enjoy sex like he does, we
don't need to stay married.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
Woo after four.
Speaker 4 (11:01):
Now, listen to me. This is the fork in the
road right here. This is what this letter is all about.
If you don't like sex the way I do, we
don't need to stay married. She said, I don't like
how he said it to me, So let me tell
you what he said. Hey, look here, you heard your mama.
(11:28):
Huh what your mama say? Whenever? Wherever? Now, take your
damn clothes off. See that's this ain't gonna work.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
I don't care how he said it.
Speaker 4 (11:46):
Now, she said, I don't like the way he said
it to me. I'm willing to compromise with him. So
what is the compromise he wanted? Whenever, wherever, morning and night,
that before you go to work, as soon as you
get off, because he started taking clothes off soon as
you get in now, So what is the compromise you
gonna make. I'm gonna give you some at night. We
(12:09):
can't do this in the morning because you're gonna mess
up my hair, and we're gonna do it at night
after dinner. Stop taking my clothes off soon as I
walk through the door. I'm just trying to figure out
the compromise, right, But if I fall short on their
amount of sex he gets, will he cheat?
Speaker 3 (12:27):
I think so?
Speaker 4 (12:29):
I would?
Speaker 2 (12:31):
Yeah, he will he cheat?
Speaker 4 (12:34):
Yeah, that is what he's gonna do. Because if I'm
him thinking like this, he got cheat rolled on the wall.
It ain't no way he wanted whenever how he take
your clothes off soon as you come in the world
kind I'm marry at y'all got and my newly weird food.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:50):
Yeah, but he is too though. I think he's a lot.
I think he's over the top. I don't see how
this is gonna work, right, I don't know what your.
Speaker 3 (13:03):
Compromise it's gonna be.
Speaker 4 (13:04):
I'd love to know what it is, but right now,
in his mind, whatever, wherever you walk through the door,
take your damn.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Clothes off and drop them.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (13:17):
Now, y'all money ain't right because y'all lease up and
you living with your mama and he living with his mama.
Y'all need a stronger base. Yeah, damn get an ABB
and B when the lease is up for somewhere.
Speaker 3 (13:29):
Y'all.
Speaker 1 (13:30):
Thank you. Leave your comments on Today's letter on Instagram
and Facebook, and at Steve harveyfm dot com. You can
check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on the free iHeartRadio app.
Coming up next it is Junior and Sports Talk. Right
after this, you're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry Letter to STEVEARVFM dot com and
click submit Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
We could be reading your letter live on the air.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
Just like we're going to read this one right here,
right now, and you never know, it could be yours.
Speaker 3 (00:20):
It could be yours. Buckle up and hold on type
guide it for you. Here it is Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Thank you nephew. Subject. If I don't do it, he
will leave me. Dear Stephen Shirley. I'm twenty nine and
my husband is thirty, and we got married four months ago.
Our wedding was won for the books, and he was
perfect until two months ago when he tried to have
sex with me three times in one day. After he proposed,
(00:47):
I spoiled him more and we started having sex once
a day. That was great, and we learned a lot
about each other sexually, but I was terrified because we
are not ready to be parents yet. After the wed
he expected sex morning and night daily. I tried to
keep up, but I had anxiety and anxiety over not
(01:08):
being on any birth control and his refusal to use protection.
He said he didn't care about having a house full
of kids, but there's no way we can have a
baby with our current finance, with our current salaries. Things
got so bad that he started taking my clothes off
as soon as I got in from work. I'm worried
about getting pregnant, so I cannot concentrate what's going on.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
What's going on.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
Luckily for me and my sanity, our lease was up,
so I have been staying with my mother for the
past two weeks and he's been staying with his mom.
My mom lectured me about not staying with my husband
for two weeks, but I told her I need a break.
She has always advised me to give it up when
he wants it and wherever he wants it. She said
(01:54):
that's how she was married for twenty nine years. I
decided to tell my husband exactly how how I'm feeling.
His response was just like my mom's. He said that
as his wife, I'm supposed to please him, and if
I don't enjoy sex like he does, then we don't
need to stay married. I don't like how he said
(02:14):
that to me, but I get it. I'm willing to
compromise with him. But if I fall short on the
amount of sex he gets, will he cheat? Am I
a newlywed fool?
Speaker 3 (02:25):
Wow?
Speaker 2 (02:26):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (02:28):
I don't think you're a newlywed fool, but you are
a newlywed and there are adjustments to be made. You, guys,
have only been married four months, and you know, you
got to kind of learn each other. And by the way,
you are his wife and not his properties, not just
what he says goes. You have a say in this
(02:48):
marriage and the sex and all of that, just like
he does. But instead you're running from him because he
wants sex three times a day or at least morning
and night, and you're not always with that your body
and he does not own you just because you're married
to him. You are right to be concerned about getting
pregnant if you're not ready, and especially if you, guys,
(03:09):
can't afford it. Your husband is controlling in this situation.
He's not considering you or your feelings and why you
feel the way you do. But here is the question,
is the only reason you're running from his constant sexual demands?
Is it because you're not on birth control and he
won't help by using protection himself. Now, that's where a
(03:32):
compromise comes in. You gotta work. You guys got to
try and work these things out. Why should the birth
control be just on you? He could wear condoms. I
know he said he wasn't, but he should. If you
guys aren't ready to get pregnant yet, you guys are
newly ways. I would hate to see you break up
over this sex thing. I really would, because he wants
(03:53):
more than you do. So I think you should please
leave your mom's house so you and your husband can
have a serious talk about this of your four year,
four month marriage. It's just not looking good right now,
this whole marriage between you guys, it's not looking good. Steve.
Speaker 4 (04:09):
The subject is if I don't do it, he will
leave me. My answer to this letter is he gone.
It's hard to pick which bump to talk to you about.
But the bump you don't want to discuss is having
a baby. Was a bump up in sex. See hear
what happened? They had a wedding, she twenty nine. He
thought they had a wedding. That was one for the books,
(04:31):
she said, But sting started after two months ago. Now
what happened was see after he proposed she said, I
spoiled him more, and we started having sex once a day. See,
once she got the ring and a commitment, she said.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
Let me lock it in.
Speaker 4 (04:55):
By spoiling him more.
Speaker 3 (04:58):
All right, so spall game went in.
Speaker 4 (05:02):
Now they getting married, he's expecting that same spailing to continue.
As a matter of fact, he picking up the pace.
He wanted morning, night, afternoon.
Speaker 3 (05:18):
Now.
Speaker 4 (05:18):
And she said that was great because they learned a
lot about each other sexually and everything.
Speaker 3 (05:23):
But after the wedding he wanted it daily. She said.
I tried to keep up, but I.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
Had anxiety over not being on birth control and his
refusal to use protection. I don't even know how this
how we have in this discussion after the marriage, all
this birth control and protection, all that should have been covered.
If y'all having sex once a day, y'all ain't had
this conversation nowhere, and then you not on birth control,
(05:56):
and then he won't use a condom.
Speaker 3 (06:01):
I thought, excuse me, was after you married?
Speaker 4 (06:05):
I thought, most married people I know have unprotected sex.
Speaker 3 (06:10):
That's most people I know.
Speaker 4 (06:12):
But due to birth control, somebody's got to practice some
type of birth control measures.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
Right?
Speaker 3 (06:17):
Should it always be on the woman? Absolutely?
Speaker 4 (06:19):
Not so it should be on him, but he don't
want to wear that and not Now y'all got a problem.
But he told you I don't care about having a
house full of kids.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
Everybody say that to Hassei.
Speaker 2 (06:33):
Hang on, hang on, yeah, Hodie, till you.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
Get a house full of kids.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
I'm killing right.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
Well that part two of Steve's response coming up on
today's Strawberry Letter at twenty three minutes after the hour.
The subject is if I don't do it, he will
leave me. We'll get back into it right after this. Hi,
this is Shirley Strawberry. And I don't know if you
know this, but I love my job. I love working
(06:59):
with Steve, Eve, and Tommy and Junior and Carla and
Monica and Dave. Of course I love all those guys.
We have a great time at work every day. Well,
if you're a business owner and you want to hire
experienced employees who love what they do too, where do
you find them? Could be a question you had. Well,
Zip recruiter is the answer. Ziprecruiters technology shows your job
(07:20):
to qualified candidates immediately, and ZipRecruiter smart technology finds top
talent fast. Go to ZipRecruiter dot com, slash Strawberry to
try it for free that ZipRecruiter dot com slash Strawberry.
All right, come on, Steve, let's recap today's Strawberry letter.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
The subject is if I don't do it, he will
leave me.
Speaker 4 (07:40):
This letter is just about a woman and a man
that's married. She's twenty nine thirty and they have a
difference of opinion on how much sex to have. After
the man proposed to her, she picked a pace up
and they was having sex daily after they got married.
He wanted morning and night. She's having anxiety and he's
saving some anxiety over it because she don't want to
get pregnant, and because cause of their salaries, she don't
(08:01):
think this is the right time. He done said just
to have sex, I don't care. We have a house
full of kids. Well, homie, that's a nice statement to make.
But he They even had a TV show that said
eight years enough. I have a saying if you got fold,
(08:23):
why would you want more? We could do that TV show.
Then there's a new series coming out called too It's Plenty,
And then there's the mega hit show that's coming out.
I don't want the ones I got, So you know,
it's a lot that can't go on in here. So
(08:43):
now she started having anxiety over this. But they don't
want to have babies now here the thing where it
took a turn. Things got so bad. He started taking
my clothes off as soon as I got in from work. Damn,
you can do that, get a break. I had to
read that line five or six times. Really, he started
(09:06):
taking my clothes offs soon as I got.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
In from work. You can do that. You can go
over to your wife and just take her closer.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
What he's too controlling.
Speaker 3 (09:18):
Hold of damp.
Speaker 4 (09:19):
You can just walk up to your wife and start
taking her clothes off.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
I didn't even put her purse down yet.
Speaker 3 (09:27):
What is mad jack?
Speaker 4 (09:29):
It's every dude listening to this going what. Luckily for
me and my sanity, our least was up. So I've
been staying with my mama for the past two weeks,
and he been staying with his mom. My mom lectured
me about not staying with my husband for two weeks,
but I told her I need a break. She's always
(09:53):
advised me giving up whenever he wanted, wherever he wanted.
She said, that's how she married for twenty nine years.
Speaker 3 (10:03):
Give it up whenever and wherever. He won't it. Where
is this marriage at?
Speaker 4 (10:12):
You can take her clothes off soon as you come
through the door, and you can get it whenever and
wherever you want it.
Speaker 3 (10:18):
Where is this marriage? I ain't get the memo.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
What I'm sitting.
Speaker 3 (10:27):
This letter is astonishing to me. Now here we go.
Speaker 4 (10:32):
I decided tell my husband exactly how I'm feeling. So
his response was, just like your mama, He said that
as your his wife, I'm supposed to please him.
Speaker 3 (10:47):
That's true, but he is supposed to please you too.
Speaker 4 (10:52):
And if I don't enjoy sex like he does, we
don't need to stay married.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
Woo after four.
Speaker 4 (11:01):
Now, listen to me. This is the fork in the
road right here. This is what this letter is all about.
If you don't like sex the way I do, we
don't need to stay married. She said, I don't like
how he said it to me, So let me tell
you what he said. Hey, look here, you heard your mama.
(11:28):
Huh what your mama say? Whenever? Wherever? Now, take your
damn clothes off. See that's this ain't gonna work.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
I don't care how he said it.
Speaker 4 (11:46):
Now, she said, I don't like the way he said
it to me. I'm willing to compromise with him. So
what is the compromise he wanted? Whenever, wherever, morning and night,
that before you go to work, as soon as you
get off, because he started taking clothes off soon as
you get in now, So what is the compromise you
gonna make. I'm gonna give you some at night. We
(12:09):
can't do this in the morning because you're gonna mess
up my hair, and we're gonna do it at night
after dinner. Stop taking my clothes off soon as I
walk through the door. I'm just trying to figure out
the compromise, right, But if I fall short on their
amount of sex he gets, will he cheat?
Speaker 3 (12:27):
I think so?
Speaker 4 (12:29):
I would?
Speaker 2 (12:31):
Yeah, he will he cheat?
Speaker 4 (12:34):
Yeah, that is what he's gonna do. Because if I'm
him thinking like this, he got cheat rolled on the wall.
It ain't no way he wanted whenever how he take
your clothes off soon as you come in the world
kind I'm marry at y'all got and my newly weird food.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:50):
Yeah, but he is too though. I think he's a lot.
I think he's over the top. I don't see how
this is gonna work, right, I don't know what your.
Speaker 3 (13:03):
Compromise it's gonna be.
Speaker 4 (13:04):
I'd love to know what it is, but right now,
in his mind, whatever, wherever you walk through the door,
take your damn.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Clothes off and drop them.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (13:17):
Now, y'all money ain't right because y'all lease up and
you living with your mama and he living with his mama.
Y'all need a stronger base. Yeah, damn get an ABB
and B when the lease is up for somewhere.
Speaker 3 (13:29):
Y'all.
Speaker 1 (13:30):
Thank you. Leave your comments on Today's letter on Instagram
and Facebook, and at Steve harveyfm dot com. You can
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