All Episodes

February 22, 2024 13 mins

Dear Steve and Shirley, I'm a forty eight year old divorced female and I'm trying online dating. My niece helped me do my dating profile and we used a real photo of me, but she suggested that I lie about my interests so I would attract a man with a nice body. So I said that I love working out, running and traveling. The app matched me with a tall, muscular, older man. He isn't cute, but we've been dating for six weeks getting to really know each other and I like him a lot. He runs marathons and he asked me to do a charity run with him in April. I said yes because I didn't know how to say no..................................

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mark as Played
Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry Letter to stevearvfm dot com and
click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your letter
live on the air, just like we're going to read
this one right here, right now, and you never know,
it could be yours.

Speaker 2 (00:21):
It could be yours. Buckle up and hold on tight.
We got it for you. Here it is Strawberry Letter.

Speaker 1 (00:26):
Thank you nephew. Subject I'm too out of shape for him.
Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm a forty eight year old divorced
female and I'm trying online dating. My niece helped me
do my dating profile and we used a real photo
of me, but she suggested that I lie about my
interests so I would attract a man with a nice body.
So I said that I love working out, running and traveling.

(00:50):
The app matched me with a tall, muscular, older man.
He isn't cute, but we've been dating for six weeks
getting to really know each other, and I like him
a lot. He runs marathons and he asked me to
do a charity run with him in April. I said yes,
but I didn't know how because I didn't know how
to say no. We started working out together and it

(01:11):
was obvious that I didn't know what to do in
the gym. I told him that I do yoga now
instead of going to the gym another lie. We worked
out so hard that my head hurt. Then we went
to my house and he told me that we were
getting in the shower together. He looked at me in
the eye and said he wanted me, and he'd been
waiting for this moment. My head was hurting, and I

(01:34):
was so nervous because I look a lot better in
my clothes than I do naked. The shower was uncomfortable,
and it felt like he realized I didn't work out
by the way he looked at my body. After the shower,
you already know, we went straight to my bed. It
was our first time together, and I had such a
hard time keeping up with him. My leg was not

(01:55):
supposed to bend the way he bent it, and it's
still hurting even surely, I have lied and ended up
with a man that is too good to be true.
I'm too out of shape for him. I can't have
sex with him again. I'm too afraid. How do I
fix my livees? But keep this man, what are you
so afraid of? I mean, working out will make you

(02:18):
more flexible, But wait a minute before you do anything
anything else. You have to learn how to say no
if you're uncomfortable, if you don't want to do something,
you can say no. You can say I'm not ready,
you can say I need more time. All of that
is okay. The second thing you need to do is
get your confidence up. Okay, that's what's sexy to a man.

(02:39):
Men are visual. You're obviously not as bad as you
think because he's seen you naked in the shower and
in the bedroom and he wasn't complaining. You just weren't
comfortable with how you looked. I think women in general
are much too hard on ourselves, and you have to
start feeling good about you. And you have to start
doing that now. You can't expect anyone else to if

(03:00):
you don't. Men pick up on those signals. You can
still work out, you can still do things with him,
You just have to go at your own pace. You
can't try to keep up with him if it's too much.
You're doing this for you, remember, not him. The third
thing I have to say to you is that people
do this all the time. Everyone lies or stretches the

(03:20):
truth on these dating sites, so some even go as
far as catfishing. I'm sure you've seen the show catfishing.
You haven't done any of that, and he's still there,
So again, don't be so hard on yourself. Anyway, didn't
you say he wasn't cute. You said he wasn't cute,
So he's probably glad to have a woman like you.

(03:41):
Be confident, Steve.

Speaker 2 (03:43):
Once again, we'd have read two different letters. Yeah, here
I go.

Speaker 3 (03:52):
I just want to say before I do this letter,
forgive me for those of you that might be slightly
put off.

Speaker 2 (04:01):
Or what shall they say, put a.

Speaker 3 (04:02):
Back by what I may say in my response. But
in the words of Lord John, here I go. So
here we go. Dear Stephen Shell. I'm a forty eight
year old divorce female and I'm trying online dating.

Speaker 2 (04:26):
Very good.

Speaker 3 (04:26):
Sixty five percent of most marriages today come from online dating.

Speaker 2 (04:30):
That's a new stat that's out.

Speaker 3 (04:32):
My niece helped me do my dating profile. We use
a real photo of.

Speaker 2 (04:36):
Me, Thank you, thank you.

Speaker 3 (04:38):
But she suggested I lie by my interest, so I
would attract a man with a nice body.

Speaker 2 (04:44):
Now let's start writing here.

Speaker 3 (04:48):
If you're gonna attract a man with a nice body,
the man with the nice body probably didn't got his
body like that because he won't to attract a woman.
And with a nice body, let's just go there. A
man is in the gym to be fit because he
liked to be fit. He probably gonna look for somebody fit.

(05:10):
That's why your niece told you to lie and tell
them your interest is that so you can find a
nice fit man. Well, you got to be fit too,
that's the key. You looking for fit, he looking for fit.
But now so I said that I love working out,

(05:30):
running and traveling. God, dog, did you write running in there?
Who liked running? Not too many people so already now see.
And then Shirley said what she Shelly just be lying
to y'all. Shirley said, you should always tell the truth.

(05:52):
Then she said, everybody lie. Well, but see now, if
you go lie, you're gonna have to work on your lion,
because y'all up in here telling lies.

Speaker 2 (06:06):
You can't got no bet.

Speaker 3 (06:07):
I love working out and running, big ass, hain't run no, well,
I ain't even been to the jail.

Speaker 2 (06:15):
She said, let me, I shouldn't just tell you something.
I'm not saying. This is the case with this lady.

Speaker 3 (06:19):
But if you chubby, if you're chubby, you you probably
don't run, and you shouldn't because it's bad on your joints.

Speaker 2 (06:28):
You're gonna miss your whole Here run, junior.

Speaker 1 (06:31):
Hang on, we'll have part two response Steve coming shot
out of shape, I stop coming up. Twenty three minutes
after the hour, we'll get back into the letter. It's
called I'm too out of shape for him. We'll hear
part two of Steve's response right after that. Boy, you're

(06:52):
listening hard Morning show. All right, Come on, Steve, let's
recap today's Strawberry letter. The subject I'm too out.

Speaker 3 (06:59):
Of well, you said it in your letter, so now
while I got to watch what I say. You're funny
eight years old. Your divorce. Ain't nothing wrong with that.
Your niece helped you get a dating profile. Use a
real photo on yourself that would shoulders up, shoulders up,
real photo, shoulders up, head shot.

Speaker 2 (07:17):
What you did, what you did? Then she suggested that
you lie.

Speaker 3 (07:22):
About your interest so that you would have trust you
to track a man with a nice body, so I said,
I love working out, running and traveling. Really okay, now
work on your lion, Work on your lion. The app
matched me with a tall, muscular, older man.

Speaker 2 (07:44):
He isn't cute. Oh, don't try to low rate him. Now.

Speaker 3 (07:48):
See you're trying to make us think something wrong with him.
But you got just what you asked for. Muscular. He
in shape because he in that gym. Matched you up
because you said you love to work out and run.
He isn't cute, but we've been dating for six weeks.
Obviously you can stomach it. He might not be cute,

(08:09):
but he ain't flat out ugly.

Speaker 2 (08:12):
Though, why are you mad? Though? No?

Speaker 3 (08:15):
She lied, No, No, I'm getting that man. We've been
dating for six weeks and getting really didn't know each other,
and I like him a lot because he got personality.
He runs marathons and he asked me to do a
charity run with him in April. I said yes because
I don't know how to say no. Now hold up,
now you're finna go run See this dating that right here?

(08:38):
For a minute, I thought this was Tommy, because we
got Tommy loved to work out, he stay in shape,
and Tommy run a lot and Tommy in good airs
shape too, So I thought this was Tommy right here.
But Tommy, well, you know, they said he was tall,
and now I.

Speaker 2 (08:52):
Said, okay, but.

Speaker 3 (08:55):
She said he was unattracted now right there, right there,
now that.

Speaker 2 (09:01):
It was you.

Speaker 3 (09:03):
Because I'm right there with you on that. I've been
trying to tell you for a while. But anyway, it
ain't something. I said yes because I don't know how
to say no. We started working out together and it
was obvious I don't know what to do in the gym.
I told him I do yoga now instead of going
to the gym. Another lie. Yeah, see, listen to me.
You got to work on your lion. You got to

(09:24):
do something. You got to do like you got to
say like you went to ribbon dancing. You gotta do
stuff people can't check on it. Yeah, you gotta do
stuff like that. You know, you play pickleball, stuff like that.
You gotta say stuff that you know other black people
don't do. Sitting up, been here lying talking about you
in the gym, and you run another lie.

Speaker 2 (09:42):
We worked out so hard my head hurt.

Speaker 3 (09:45):
Then we went to my house and he told me
we was getting in the shower together. He looked at
her in my eyes and said he wanted me, and
he'd been waiting for this moment. My head was hurting,
and I was so nervous because I look a lot
better in my clothes than I do naked. That's ninety
eight percent of the people in the world, Lady, don't
worry about that.

Speaker 2 (10:03):
Everybody looked better in clothes.

Speaker 3 (10:07):
So I was nervous because I look a lot better
in my clothes than I do naked.

Speaker 2 (10:12):
The shower was uncomfortable. Now, let's get back to this weight. Now.
The shower was uncomfortable because it was crowded in there.

Speaker 3 (10:21):
You got your little chubby ass up in there, and
that shower got crowded. Big muscle, uglass dude in that
big muscle with the trade face, he up in there,
just in that strong.

Speaker 2 (10:31):
All the muscles.

Speaker 3 (10:31):
He flexted your little chubby ass in there. And now
you uncomfortable in the shot because it's crowded in there
too much weight. Y'all all up against the glass and
tore the damn curtain down there. Y'all got water all
over the toilet.

Speaker 1 (10:43):
See where is that in the letter?

Speaker 3 (10:46):
It's in there, Shirley ain't depends and I felt like
he realized that I didn't work out by the way
he looked at my body because he was looking round it,
around it. He couldn't find the knob in there. He
was trying to get the water a little hotter, but
he couldn't reach the knob because you was all in

(11:08):
the knob, the nozzle and the window all up in here.
Chubby Asten told him, you like running. You know you
ain't ran, no damn well, you run up them steps
so you'll fall out anyway. After the shower, you already know.
We went straight to my bed. You had to hear
up and get under them sheets. He went straight to

(11:31):
my bed. It was our first time together. And I
had such a hard time keeping up with him because
he in the gym. He in shape, and I'm to
tell you something about ugly man too. We got to
be able to bring it because we might not get
a second chance. So you couldn't even hardly keep up
with him. My leg was not supposed to be in
that way. He bent it and it's still hurting. It

(11:52):
supposed to go back there. Oh, he didn't do nothing.
He ain't seen before. He had your ankle in his
hand and it was back there by the other girl.
If yours don't go back there, Shirley come talking about
you need to get more flexible. You ain't gonna get
flexible by the next date.

Speaker 2 (12:06):
That's for days.

Speaker 3 (12:09):
That's run and tell a whole hamstrang out trying to
keep over the fool in this bed.

Speaker 2 (12:14):
This is over with.

Speaker 3 (12:15):
This relationship is done. You fought there, you and your
old ass husband wasn't doing none of that. I have
lied and ended up with the man that's too good
to be true. I'm too out of shape him. I
can't have sex with him again. That's right now. I'm
too afraid he should be. How do I fix my lives?

(12:35):
I'll keeping this man?

Speaker 2 (12:36):
He gone?

Speaker 1 (12:37):
He is gone.

Speaker 2 (12:38):
He gone.

Speaker 3 (12:39):
Shelly, Lie and your leg don't go back there.

Speaker 2 (12:44):
What we ain't here do now?

Speaker 3 (12:46):
You ain't flexing, Chubby, You ain't flexible. At least be flexible.

Speaker 1 (12:51):
Post your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey FM,
and check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on the free
iHeartRadio app. It never sounded so good, so you should
download it today. Coming up in forty six minutes after
the hour, Junior is here with sports talk. Right after this,
you're listening to The Dave Harvey Morning Show
Advertise With Us

Host

Shirley Strawberry

Shirley Strawberry

Popular Podcasts

24/7 News: The Latest

24/7 News: The Latest

The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.

Therapy Gecko

Therapy Gecko

An unlicensed lizard psychologist travels the universe talking to strangers about absolutely nothing. TO CALL THE GECKO: follow me on https://www.twitch.tv/lyleforever to get a notification for when I am taking calls. I am usually live Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays but lately a lot of other times too. I am a gecko.

Music, radio and podcasts, all free. Listen online or download the iHeart App.

Connect

© 2025 iHeartMedia, Inc.