Is There Something Better Out There

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
Well, Happy Valentine's Day. It is time now for the
Strawberry Letter, and if you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex,
parenting and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve
HARVEYFM dot com and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could
be reading your letter live on the air, just like
we're gonna read this one right here, right now, and

(00:24):
you never know. It could be yours. It could be yours.
Buckle up a hole on type. We got it for you.
Here it is Strawberry Letter. Thank you nephew. Subject. Is
there something better out there? Dear Stephen Shirley. I'm fifty
two years old and I've been dating a married man
for fourteen years. Our arrangement works out great, and we
have a condo together, and we traveled together. My family

(00:47):
loves him, and I love his family. Our condo is
downtown and his house in the suburbs with his wife
is in the suburbs with his wife, so I've never
run into them together. He put me in his will
recently after he had his appendix removed, and that strengthened
his commitment to me. Our connection is so real. I

(01:08):
lost a lot of married girlfriends over the years that
say I'm a homewrecker and I need to get a
life and leave this man alone. I believe it is
possible to love more than one person, so that is
why I have been thinking about stepping out on my
men and getting a man on the side. I have
been with the same guy for fourteen years, and I
know he's not having sex with his wife, but I

(01:31):
want to experiment a little with someone new, just in
case he is. I meet men all the time, but
the one I met last week has really got my attention.
The first night, he sent me nudes and I was
very impressed. I told him I am in a relationship
and he said that's fine for now, but I'm going
to be his woman one day soon. He is fifty

(01:54):
and he's never been married. I want to get to
know him, but he wants to rush right into sex.
I like, I should be honest with my boyfriend and
tell him I've met someone. This new guy said, I
don't have to tell my married man anything. He said,
I should have a man all to myself, and I'm
selling myself short. I'm not like other women that need

(02:14):
a man around all of the time. So I was content.
The new guy has me thinking is there something better
out there? Or does he just want to have sex? Well?
Yes and yes? Is there something better out there? Yes?
Does he just want to have sex? Yes? I cannot
believe this letter. I mean, really, do you hear yourself.

(02:36):
You've been with a married man for fourteen years that
you've been fooled into thinking doesn't have sex with his wife. Wow.
Just because you guys have a condo together, just because
you travel together, doesn't mean they are not at home
in the suburbs doing it. He lives with her, he
sleeps with her. Okay, you wrote this letter like everything

(03:00):
is fine, You're cool, everything's good. Well, it's not fine.
Everything is not good. Everyone sees this, but you. The
married women that used to be your friends don't like you.
He's creeping, he's cheating with you. You're still the other woman,
You're still the side piece to jump off all of that.
He may have put you in his will, but really,
if something happens to him, who do you think the

(03:22):
insurance company is gonna contact? Not you the wife? Okay,
you have no rights, you have no say in this
man's life. That would be fourteen years you put in
for nothing. What a waste. Don't you want a man
of your own? And I'll tell you this, this new man,
I don't think he's right either, because he just wants sex.

(03:44):
You said it yourself, you need to get out of
this going nowhere relationship. Don't even entertain this new guy.
So yes, again, there is something better out there for you,
but you can't see it because you won't get out
of your own way. You are fifty two years old.
You gotta do better for yourself. Neither one of these
guys mean you any good, So stop letting them use

(04:04):
you for sex and just get out now. Steve, I'm
gonna just jump right into this letter right here, because
this letter right here is kind of makes me mad.
Throughout the letter, it's fifty two year old woman, been
dating the married man for fourteen years. She started this
when she was thirty eight. That's a big chunk of

(04:24):
your life dedicated to something that ain't going nowhere. Obviously,
our arrangement works out great, and we have a condo together,
and we traveled together. My family loves him, I love
his family. Where is this going? Our condo is downtown
and his houses and the suburbs with his wife. So
I've never running to them together. Well, that's because it's

(04:46):
the perfect distance. You downtown, durn the suburbs. He got
a creep crib and you in it. He put me
in his real recently after he had his appendix removed,
and that strengthen his commitment to me. No, lady, he
hold you. He put you in his will. He told
you that you sit up there and tell your wife

(05:07):
were fit to put this in the wheel? Were you crazy? Honey?
Put you in no damn will. He told you that
that line made me sicken. In any other line damn
than in this letter. Put you in his will. Our
connection is so real. I lost a lot of married
girlfriends over the years and say, I'm a home wreck
and I needed to get a life and lead this

(05:27):
man alone. I believe it's possible to love more than
one person. So that is why I'm half thinking about
stepping out on my man and getting a man on
the side. Well why not? Why not you a side?
Now you are? Now you're thinking about getting a man
on the side. And you say it's because you believe
that a person can love more than one person. That

(05:51):
that's what he told you. See, he took the married
dude told you that that's where you got that from.
So now you're thinking, well, okay, well, since he loved
two people, let me go love two people. I've been
with the same guy for fourteen years and I know
he's not having sex with his wife. What what in
fourteen years? They ain't got no kids? This man ain't

(06:16):
got no kids. How you think they got him? I
want to experiment with a little, a little with someone new,
just in case he is. I thought you said he
wouldn't having sex. Now you say you want to experiment
on the side, just in case heah, you mean just
in case he having sex at his house and the

(06:36):
end the penhouse, little girl. All right, Steve, hang on,
hang on, Okay. We'll have part two of your response
coming up at twenty three minutes after the hour today's
Strawberry Letters subject is there something better out there? We'll
get back into it right after this You're listening show.

(06:58):
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(07:20):
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two five one fifty four hundred. All right, Steve, come on,
let's recap today's strawberry letter. The subject is is there
something better out there? Fitted you? Y'all? Woman been dating
this man for fourteen years. The arrangement is great. He
got a a little apartment together downtown. His family lives

(07:42):
out in the suburbs. She feels as though their relationship
to strengthen now because he put me in his wheel
recently after his appendix, and that strengthen his commitment to me.
That didn't listen to me. How does that strengthen his commitment?
He puts you in the wheel? This is after he died.

(08:04):
But what where's the commitment after he died? Do you
understand what the wheel is? It's enforced after the depth
of the person. If he's strengthening his commitment to you,
it ain't after death. He goes, he ain't committed to
nobody now, And let me tell you something. You ain't

(08:27):
in no wheel. He told you he put you in
the wheel. You believe anything, you can't You kind of stupid. Really,
I then you said, I believe it's possible a little
more than one person. That's because he told you that too.
That's why I've been thinking about stepping out on my
man and getting a man on the side. I've been
in the same guy for fourteen years. I know he's

(08:48):
not having sex with his wife. He is, but I
want to experiment a little with someone new, just in
case he is. Okay, he's having sex with his wife.
I'm just gonna tell you that man and that you
want to experience with somebody, just in case he is ain't. No,
in case he is. I meet me and all the time.
But the one I met last week really got my attention. Okay,

(09:08):
listen to this line. The first night he sent me nudes,
and I was very impressed. You was impressed. The first
night he sent you nudes, and you was impressed. Your
aunt should have been scared. See, you don't know what
to feel. This man just met you, and all of
a sudden he's sending the nude pictures and you was impressed.

(09:31):
Your ass should have been scared. I told him I'm
in a relationship, and he said, that's fine for now,
but I'm going to be his woman one day soon. Okay, ladies,
don't want to teach you all something. If a man
says to you, you gonna be my woman one day soon,
I want you to hear what that really means. That

(09:53):
means you gonna be his woman for one day, and
the next line as soon as possible. So as soon
as possible, you're gonna be his woman for one day. Now.
He had already sent you news, and then he follows
it up with this line. Right, he didn't even know you.

(10:15):
He's fifty and he's never been married, and I want
to get to know him, but he wants to rush
right into sex. That's why he sent the news. You
got the new picture. You're right about that. He sent
you the new picture first night. I feel like I

(10:37):
should be honest with my boyfriend and tell him I
met someone. Okay, then what okay, go ahead and try
that and then write us back. Let us know how.
We go ahead and tell him that. The new guy said,
I don't have to tell my married man anything. Boy.

(10:58):
People can just tell you anything. Yo. Bother side said,
you ain't got to tell him nothing. You should have
a man all to yourself, and I'm selling myself short.
I'm not like other women that need a man around
all the time. So I was content. The new guy
has me thinking, is there's something better out there? Does

(11:19):
he just want to say? Shirley's absolutely right, Yes he
does want to say, and that's all he wanted to say.
He just met you. He's send you nudes the first night.
You impressed and you should have been scared. Who does
that if you meet a guy on the first night
he sent your new picture of himself? What you think
he wants? How stupid can you be? Didn't he tell

(11:44):
you don't need to tell your friend nothing because he
know now he gonna talk you out of sleeping with him. Look, lady,
you got low self esteem fourteen years you with someone
that ain't going nowhere. Now you're want experiment, But because
you don't have any experience at dating, you just have
experience at creeping. Now you don't even know what to

(12:06):
say to the dude that's dating. So lady, I don't look,
I don't know. I don't let me see what she
asked us far. Is that something better out there? Of
course it is? Yeah, But See the problem with you
getting something better is you ain't what better people want.
See that's a word. You can't get what you don't give.

(12:32):
You want a man that's upstanding, it's gonna treat you
right when you're not treating other people right. Or you
want somebody to treat you a certain way when you
let anybody treat you any kind of way. So is
it something better out there? To answer that question is
absolutely there's something better out there. But that's something better
is looking for something better hisself and right now you

(12:56):
ain't it. So I don't know what you want, and
I don't know what anybody out there wants that does
this type of thing. So that's it for you. I
don't know what else to tell you. Yeah, now, look,
let's be adults about this whole thing. Situations happen, that's life.

(13:16):
But lady you wrote in I'm just telling you you're
going down and you're to know where relationship, and you
just gotta understand that if you were seeing other people
trying to get your life together, I'd understand that you've
been on hold for fourteen years. Yeah, all right, thank you. Steve.
Post your comments on today's Strawberry Letter. It's Steve Harvey,

(13:39):
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Letter podcast on demand now coming up At forty six
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Sports Talk. Right after this, you're listening to Harvey Morning Show.