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February 19, 2025 13 mins

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Speaker 1 (00:00):
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve BARVFM dot com
by clicking.

Speaker 2 (00:11):
Submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading.

Speaker 1 (00:13):
Your letter live on the air, just like we're going
to read this one right here, right now. And you
never know, this one could be yours.

Speaker 3 (00:21):
It could be yours. Buckle up and hold on tight.

Speaker 4 (00:23):
Be got it for you Here it is Strawberry Letter.

Speaker 2 (00:26):
Thank you, nephew.

Speaker 1 (00:27):
Subject My husband loves to go tit for tat with me.
Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm in my mid thirties and I've
been married for a year. My husband was great at first,
but I'm seeing a side of him that's been bugging me.
When we first met, I was in a relationship and
my boyfriend had cheated on me. So I slept with
the guy that I'm now married to to get back

(00:51):
at my boyfriend. My now husband knew what I was
doing and he was with it as long as he
could sleep with me. We became close after that, and
he eventually got a divorce and I broke up with
my boyfriend, so we could be together. After a few
months of living with him, he spent the night with
his ex wife. He said that he thought I would

(01:11):
understand since I'm a cheater, that struck a chord with me.
But what could I say? I did cheat on my
ex with him. So fast forward to a few years
down the line and we had a major argument and
I left his house for two months. During the breakup,
I was messing with a barber that cuts my son's hair.
I never expected anyone to find out, but the stylist

(01:33):
started gossiping and the rumor spread. I ended up getting
back with my man and we got married a year ago.
Just days after the wedding, he let me know that
he knew all about me and the barber sneaking around.
I admitted that I did it because I never want
to lie to my husband. I felt so good about
being honest, but my husband always has to go tit

(01:56):
for tat with me, and I was afraid he would
seek revenge. Last week, he stayed out all night and
he told me that he was with his ex wife.
This marriage won't last if he's always playing tit for
tat with me. How can we remain faithful and stop
playing these games faithful. Well, I don't know how you can.

(02:16):
I don't think you can. You've proven that time and
time again, both of you had. Haven't you heard the saying,
if he'll cheat with you, he'll cheat on you. That's
a real saying, and it applies here. This marriage was
doomed before it even started because you guys cheated. You
cheated on him, You cheated with him on your boyfriend,

(02:37):
and he cheated with you on his wife. Then he
left his wife to marry you. I mean, this is
a mess on every level. And can I just say
that cheating is not really what they meant when they
were talking about tit for tat. I mean, okay, tit
for tat does mean, you know, giving back an equal
retaliation for something done to you. We can say that,

(02:58):
but not in cheating. Though not in cheating. That's just
too much, it's too far. Just leave if you got
to do all of this, I don't understand why you're
staying when you know he cheats and he knows you cheat.

Speaker 2 (03:12):
What kind of marriage is this?

Speaker 1 (03:13):
And you guys can't get past it because the trust
is broken?

Speaker 2 (03:18):
What are you gonna do about this? This is crazy?

Speaker 4 (03:20):
Steve First of all, there's no point in writing us
this letter nothing. There is not one single redeeming quality.
And then the one redeeming quality you try to show backfire.

(03:42):
So here we go. My husband loves to go tit
for tat with me. Well, that means you do something,
I do something, You do something I do You do
it back, and you do it.

Speaker 3 (03:53):
I do it, I do it, you do it. That's okay,
got it? Okay, we're going. I mean you and your
mid thirties. You've been married for a year.

Speaker 4 (03:59):
Your husband was great at first, but I'm seeing a
side of him that's been bugging me. When y'all first met,
you were in a relationship with your boyfriend who cheated
on you. So you slept with the guy that you
married to. Now to get back at my boyfriend. All right,

(04:20):
here we go. Now you did something lady to your
boyfriend that was tit for tap. You cheating on me.
I'm gonna cheat for you. You introduced this, but it
wasn't just you because watch this, my now husband knew
I was doing.

Speaker 3 (04:39):
It, and he was with it as long as he
could sleep with me. Ain't that always the case?

Speaker 4 (04:46):
We became close after that, he eventually got a divorce
and I broke up and Nober, you can't just throw
that in now. We sought that, you said, we became
close after he eventually got a divorce and I broke
up my boyfriend so we could be together. Wait a minute,
so now he was cheating on his wife with you,

(05:11):
so he was she know his wife?

Speaker 3 (05:14):
You cheated on your boyfriend with him?

Speaker 4 (05:16):
He was cool with it. After a few months of
living with him, Where has come from? Y'all just moved it?
See you throwing stuff in here? Like ain't nobody reading
this damn letter? After a few months of living with him?

Speaker 3 (05:28):
What you living with him?

Speaker 1 (05:30):
Fall?

Speaker 4 (05:32):
He spent the night with his ex wife?

Speaker 3 (05:35):
What this letter?

Speaker 1 (05:41):
You?

Speaker 3 (05:42):
You could never take a breath in this letter?

Speaker 4 (05:46):
One thing I would get a later, lady, she must
you remember that book used to come out called Reader's Digest.

Speaker 1 (05:52):
Uh huh.

Speaker 3 (05:53):
What Readers Digest.

Speaker 4 (05:54):
Did was it took long stories and condensed them where
you could help and read it.

Speaker 3 (05:59):
Well, this is to digest trouble day? Did she just help?
And after few moss and he spent the night with
his ex wife.

Speaker 4 (06:08):
He said, he thought I would understand since I'm a
cheating that struck a chord with me. But what could
I say? Okay, I don't know what you could have said,
But what you could have said? What like we said, Yeah,
I did cheat on my ex with him. So when

(06:30):
we come back, we'll read the rest of this crazy
ass letter.

Speaker 1 (06:34):
Yes, all right, Steve, hang on, we'll have part two
of your response coming up at twenty three minutes after
the hour. Today's Strawberry letter subject my husband loves to
go tit for tat with me. We'll get into it,
back into it right after this. Hey, this is your
girl Shirley's Strawberry. And according to research, a major challenge

(06:58):
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can invite top candidates for your job to apply. Go

(07:21):
to ZipRecruiter dot com slash strawberry to try it for free.
That's ZipRecruiter dot com slash strawberry. All right, come on, Steve,
let's recap Today's Strawberry letter, the subject my husband loves
to go tit for tat with me.

Speaker 3 (07:36):
This letter is so crazy, y'all.

Speaker 4 (07:37):
This is a letter about two people who don't need
to be married. This woman uh is married now and
the way they met was she was in a relationship
with her boyfriend. Her boyfriend cheated on her, so to
get back at him, she started cheating with another guy.
The guy she started cheating with is her husband. Now

(08:00):
he knew her husband knew that she had this ex
boyfriend and was cheating on him, but he was cool
with it. So then, y'all, after you left your boyfriend
and he got a divorce, he threw that in their owners.
Then you discovered that your boyfriend was cheating on his wife.

Speaker 3 (08:23):
Your boyfriend is now your husband, who.

Speaker 4 (08:25):
Was cheating on his wife. So both y'all was cheating
at the same time. So y'all got a divorce, broke
up with your boyfriend so we could be together. Then
as soon as y'all got together, y'all obviously moved in
a few moments have to live it with him.

Speaker 3 (08:38):
He spent the night with his ex wife.

Speaker 4 (08:41):
He said he thought I would understand since I'm a cheater,
and I guess he was saying, you already know I'm
a cheater because I was cheating on my wife when
I was with you, and it was cool with you
cause you cheating on your boyfriend.

Speaker 3 (08:55):
So when I saw cheating on, cheating on with her gear,
what is the damn right?

Speaker 2 (09:01):
You nailed it, Steve.

Speaker 4 (09:03):
That struck a card with me. But what could I say?
I did cheat on my ex with him. So fast
forward a few years down the line, we had a
major argument and I left his house.

Speaker 3 (09:13):
For two months.

Speaker 4 (09:15):
Okay, during the breakup, I was messing with a barber
that cuts my son's hair. You don't waste no damn ton,
You get right on back in the relationship. Because soon
as you and your boyfriend broke up and he got divorced,
y'all moved in together. As soon as y'all had argument

(09:35):
and you left his house, I would go down here
and sleep.

Speaker 3 (09:38):
With my son's barber.

Speaker 4 (09:41):
I never expected anybody to find out, but the styling
started gossipling in the rumor spread. Then I ended up
getting back with my man and we got married a
year ago on the basis of what the what?

Speaker 3 (09:57):
What was this marriage for cheating? I don't understand it,
and say, days days after the wind.

Speaker 4 (10:08):
He let me know he knew all about me and
the barber sneaking around. I admitted it because I never
want to lie to my husband.

Speaker 3 (10:15):
Pumped the breaks right here where even morals come from
all the time.

Speaker 4 (10:22):
Now, all of a sudden, you want to be moral.

Speaker 3 (10:27):
I never want to lie to my husband.

Speaker 4 (10:30):
Wait a minute, since when and lion become worse than cheat?

Speaker 3 (10:38):
Don't understand?

Speaker 4 (10:41):
Let's talk about the importance, the significance and the value
of lying.

Speaker 2 (10:47):
Don't they go together?

Speaker 4 (10:48):
Though?

Speaker 2 (10:49):
What cheating and lying?

Speaker 3 (10:51):
Oh? Absolutely one has nothing to do with the other.

Speaker 2 (10:58):
I think if you cheat, your lying?

Speaker 3 (11:02):
No, sure it, that's not the case.

Speaker 4 (11:05):
Lying is a separate skill set that requires lion holds
relationships together.

Speaker 3 (11:13):
Lying leads to everlasting peace.

Speaker 4 (11:17):
Lion is needed in order to maintain a level of serenity.
Don't you Dawn put cheating in jar me? How dare you?
But it felt so good about being honest? You finally

(11:37):
you're talking about honesty?

Speaker 3 (11:38):
Felt good? Okay?

Speaker 4 (11:40):
But my husband always has to go tip for tap
with me, and I was afraid he would seek revenge.
That's what you did in the beginning, last week he
stayed out all night and he told me he was
with his ex wife. This marriage won't last if he's
always playing tip for tappa me?

Speaker 3 (11:57):
What marriage?

Speaker 4 (12:00):
What marriage are y'all talking about? I don't understand when
people get married. You remember these words y'all say at
the altar? Come remember that? So now I'm just trying
to ask you. I'm asking you now, which one of
them words did you say?

Speaker 3 (12:18):
Maybe y'all wrote.

Speaker 2 (12:19):
Your own vial that could have happened.

Speaker 3 (12:21):
There could have.

Speaker 4 (12:22):
Been it and them ain't worth for domn How can
we remain faithful and stop playing these games?

Speaker 3 (12:32):
Y'all can't.

Speaker 4 (12:34):
Ain't neither one of y'all has a track record of
being faithful.

Speaker 3 (12:39):
Faithful is not what you do. Y'all don't need.

Speaker 4 (12:43):
To be married because as soon as something go wrong,
y'all go get somebody else.

Speaker 3 (12:48):
It ain't even got to be nothing wrong.

Speaker 4 (12:50):
But he done already told you since you cheat, I
know you understand.

Speaker 3 (12:55):
I'm over here with my ex wife.

Speaker 2 (12:57):
It's kind of like an open marriage, is it?

Speaker 3 (13:00):
This one right here? Open and she's do.

Speaker 2 (13:03):
Whatever they want to do and come back to each other.

Speaker 4 (13:06):
I don't know what this is, yes, but everybody. But
why is everybody surprised when they wouldn't when it wouldn't
work when they get to open news though?

Speaker 3 (13:18):
What is this all a gasp for? Man? Please buye?
Why y'all married? Why y'all write us?

Speaker 1 (13:25):
Leave your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter on Instagram and
Facebook at Steve Harvey FM, and check us out on
the Strawberry Letter podcast on the free iHeartRadio app. Coming
up next, it is Junior and Sports Talk right after this.

Speaker 3 (13:39):
YO, this is Jamie Fox, This is Kim Whitley.

Speaker 2 (13:41):
You already know what it is masin mat Chico Bean
and you are now listening to the Steve Horvey Morning Show.
You're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show.
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Host

Shirley Strawberry

Shirley Strawberry

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