August 12, 2022 • 13 mins
Dear Steve and Shirley, I’ve been in a relationship for almost two years and when I think about the things this man has shown me sexually and mentally, I am floored. He literally takes my breath away. But there are a few problems with our relationship. We’ve never spent a night together and I’ve never met his family, except for his twin daughters and their mother. It was a quick “Hi” and “Bye” when we ran into them at Target..............
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if you need
advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more. Please
submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve Harvey FM and click
submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your letter live
on the air, just like we're going to read this
one right here, right now. Buggle up, hold on tight.
(00:21):
We got it for you. Here It is Drawberry Letter.
Thank you, nephew. Subject My man treats me like an afterthought.
Dear Stephen Shirley. I've been in a relationship for almost
two years, and when I think about the things this
man has shown me sexually and mentally, I am floored.
He literally takes my breath away. But there are a
(00:45):
few problems with our relationship. We've never spent a night together,
and I've never met his family except for his twin
daughters and their mother. What except for his twin daughters
and their mother. It was a quick high and by
when we ran into them at Target. We were not
together on our one year anniversary because of his job.
(01:10):
You got it now. I didn't see him on Valentine's
Day because he had his daughters that night. I saw
him the next day and he gave me flowers. His
birthday is three days before Christmas, but I didn't see
him until Christmas Eve because his grandparents were in town.
There was nothing on Christmas Day, and he went to
church for New Year's Eve without me. Then he came
(01:34):
over for a few hours on New Year's Day to
make up for it. I don't discuss how I feel
about things for fear of running him off, because he
told me his ex girlfriend nagged him a lot. He
is always busy if I asked to see him. If
I asked to see him, but when he calls me,
I will drop everything to be with him. I don't
(01:54):
know why he's acting this way, and I pray it's
not what my subconsciousness telling me it is. In his
defense end, he does work extreme hours. He has his
kids every other weekend, and he likes to chill with
his boys to unwind. I offered to cook dinner at
his house so we could have a heart to heart,
and he said he still needs to buy furniture and
(02:14):
fix his place up before I can come over. I
need him to make me a priority in his life.
How can I get this through to him? Has our
relationship run its course, He'll never make you a priority.
He'll never do that because guess what, he already has
a priority in his life. Okay, he has a priority.
You should have titled and titled this letter for two
(02:37):
years I've been in a relationship with a married man,
because that's what it is. I mean, think about it.
You never ever get holidays. You don't get Christmas. You
don't even get his birthday, which is three days before Christmas.
You don't get New Year's Eve. You don't get New
Year's Day, well, you get a couple of hours when
he decides to come over. You don't get Valentine's Day,
(02:58):
that's the day for lovers. You don't get anything. And
he played you so hard. He told you his ex
girlfriend nagged a lot. So now you're scared, you said,
you're scared of running him off. You're scared to tell
him how you feel and what all of this means
to you, and why doesn't he spend more time with you,
and what's going on. You're scared to bring up how
(03:19):
you feel he puts you off. He's always too busy
for you. He's got the kids every other weekend, or
he's going out with his boys. You can't even go
over his house because he doesn't have any furniture, really,
and you make excuses for him at every turn. You
have to stop this talking about in his defense, he's
very busy, Yeah, busy with his wife and family running
(03:42):
away from you. You have to stop all of this.
You got to stop seeing him. You have to stop
answering his call, stop calling him, stop everything, all of
the above, because you already know what's going on. You
said it. You're subconscious. You don't want it to be
what you're subconscious is telling you that it is. Well,
that's what it is. Listen to your self conscious, all right. Please,
(04:03):
please don't be stupid on this. I mean, don't be
just don't be. Get yourself together. Listen to your head
and not your heart. In this situation, the man has
a wife. Steve, I just wow, I know how long
have we been doing these letters? Yeah? How obvious does
(04:24):
it have to be? Yeah? How many times have we
given advice on this subject? Right here? You say, my
man treats me like an afterthought. That's cause that's what
you are. See. You solved that the answer is in
the letter. I've been in relationship for two years and
(04:45):
now hear what you hear you, hear the glory of it.
When I think about the thing this man has shown
me sexually and mentally, I'm floored. Why well, let's talk
about what he didn't showed you. We don't know what
he's doing sexually, but obviously you sprung. He literally takes
my breath away. Now he go to letter. We've got
some problems though I've never spent an we've never spent
(05:05):
a night together, and I've never met his family. What
two years and you ain't been over his house? And
later on in the letters say because he ain't got
no furniture? Who take two years to get a couch?
A couch? Who have got this place? And in two
(05:27):
years ain't got a couch, ain't got no damn bad
ain't got a TV? Who been a day house for
two years without no damn cable? And somewhere that sick?
Where do he eat when he at home? What do
you mean he don't have furniture? Listen to me, And
I've never met his family except for his twin daughters
(05:50):
and named mother. And it was a quick hind by
we ran into them and talking that was an accident.
That was a damn accident. He damn show. Wasn't it
for you to meet them in? But you did? We
were not together on our one year anniversary. That's because
y'all don't have anniversary. What did you What did you
(06:10):
making up? Y'all don't have anniversary because of his job.
I didn't see him on Valentine's Day. That because you
ain't his Valentine. I'm gonna just give it to you
because he had his daughters that night. Who'll spend Valentine's
with the damn kids? Right, we're supposed to be having
(06:31):
sex on Valentine's Day? What did your kids in here? Fault?
Keep your asswa fing the dog crazy? I got the
rest of it for you when I come back, Steve,
I'm not even pulling no punches with this. Please don't.
We'll have part two Steve's response coming up at twenty
(06:52):
three minutes after the hour. You're listening, all right, Steve,
come on, let's recap today's Strawberry letter. My man treats
me like an afterthought. Well that's caused you are, and
it's all in the damn letter. Other than when y'all
having this crazy ass sex where you didn't learn so
much you on the floe. So now he literally takes
(07:16):
my breath away. But then we got some problems. She
ain't never spend the night at the man's house two years?
Why because he say he don't have no furniture yet.
My question is, who ain't bought a couch in two years?
(07:36):
I don't know where do he eat when he at home?
He just standing in the middle of the floor with
some containers. I've never met his family except for his
twin daughters and their mother. And it was a real
quick hid by we ran into them at Target. That
(07:59):
was a damn accident. Oh yeah, we were not together
on our one year anniversary. That's because y'all don't have anniversaries.
I'm just going over what I went over and then
we'll get to the rest of it. Because of his job,
I didn't see him on Valentine's Day. No, that ain't
caused his job. It's because you didn't see him on
Valentine's Day because you ain't as Valentine because he had
(08:20):
his daughters that night. Who the hell spend Valentine Night
with their kids, even if it's my week of custody.
Somebody for the watch their ass or Valentine's Night because
I got to go see somebody naked with a dipper
on with a bowling arrow Cupid. I didn't played Cupid
(08:40):
on Valentine's Day. I didn't jumped out the closet with
a dipper A long time ago. Y'all ain't know me.
Then I was young. I had the body for that dipper.
I saw him the next day and he gave me flowers.
You know why you got flowers because he spent all
(09:03):
the money on the press and the candy on the
other girl. And anybody can give you flowers, that's just stop.
They sell them on the corner. His birthday is three
days before Christmas, but I didn't see him until Christmas
Eve because his grandparents was in time. Wow, who need
four days with some old ass people that say marry Christmas?
(09:26):
Who needs full damn days with some old people that
say mary Christmas? Then there was nothing on Christmas Day
as Joe. No, no, no no, that's where you're wrong. Oh,
Christmas Day was popping. It was jis family woman. Christmas
was lit. It just wasn't with you, because who can
(09:50):
leave their house on Christmas Day? And why would he
not come over to your house on Christmas Day? He
got no damn furniture. He didn't even got a little nothing.
Sit on and look at the damn lights on the tree.
Everybody like putting the tree up, getting a cup of call,
felt some hot chocolate, looking at the tree and they
dream and then having fun. That's the purpose of a tree. Christmas. Yeah,
(10:15):
that was nothing on Christmas Day. And he went to
church on New Year's Eve without me. That man was
not in church on New Year's Eve. He was just
without you. He told you he went to church on
New Year's Eve. His ass ain't go to church on
New Year's Eve. Then he came over for a few
hours on New Year's Day to make up for it. Oh.
(10:38):
I bet that's when y'all was in the flow having
some of that mind blowing sex. I don't discuss how
I feel about things. For feel running him off because
he told me his ex girlfriend nagged him a lot.
You know why, because she was trying to figure out
how the hell you gonna come over because he had
he ain't had no furniture in this apartment for about
eight years. She wearing his asked the death about coming over,
(11:01):
and she had never spent the night over there. Okay,
he's always busy if I ask to see him, but
when he calls me, I drop everything. I don't know
why he's acting this way. What you've been with him
two years and you don't know why he acted in
this way. He can't act no other way. He got
(11:22):
a family. He got a family. He can't act no
other way. I pray is not what my suspicion is
telling me. It is stop praying for something God gives
you to protect you. You have this thing called intuition.
It's telling you. Now you want to call it yourself conscious.
(11:44):
I'm prayers, not what my self conscious is telling me.
It's your intuition and it is telling you that. And
God gives it to women to protect them. And all
of women out there listening, No, every time they go
against what their intuition tells them, they pay for Every
woman has done it. True. Now in his defense, he
(12:05):
does work extreme hours. What is he a force fighter?
Come on? What job he got where he work for
stream hours? What is he in the UFC fighter? What
is extreme hours? So he don't get no time? He
working all these hours and still can't buy no damn
(12:27):
couch and bed. But he worked extreme hours daint. He
has his kids every other weekend, and he likes to
cheer with his boys on wine. I like cheering with
my boys online too, but I'd rather be somewhere having sex.
What are you talking about? I want to cook dinner
(12:48):
at his house. He can't have you over there. Somebody
over there already cooking and they're not gonna understand you
coming over because that's they kitchen, right all right. I
need him to make me a proud in his life.
He's not. How can I get through to him? You can't.
Is our relationship run his course? You have no relationship.
That's your strawberry lever all right? Thank you, Steve. Post
(13:10):
your comments on today's Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey FM
on Instagram and Facebook, and please don't forget to check
out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand. You're listening to
this Stave Harvey Morning Show
Time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if you need
advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more. Please
submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve Harvey FM and click
submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your letter live
on the air, just like we're going to read this
one right here, right now. Buggle up, hold on tight.
(00:21):
We got it for you. Here It is Drawberry Letter.
Thank you, nephew. Subject My man treats me like an afterthought.
Dear Stephen Shirley. I've been in a relationship for almost
two years, and when I think about the things this
man has shown me sexually and mentally, I am floored.
He literally takes my breath away. But there are a
(00:45):
few problems with our relationship. We've never spent a night together,
and I've never met his family except for his twin
daughters and their mother. What except for his twin daughters
and their mother. It was a quick high and by
when we ran into them at Target. We were not
together on our one year anniversary because of his job.
(01:10):
You got it now. I didn't see him on Valentine's
Day because he had his daughters that night. I saw
him the next day and he gave me flowers. His
birthday is three days before Christmas, but I didn't see
him until Christmas Eve because his grandparents were in town.
There was nothing on Christmas Day, and he went to
church for New Year's Eve without me. Then he came
(01:34):
over for a few hours on New Year's Day to
make up for it. I don't discuss how I feel
about things for fear of running him off, because he
told me his ex girlfriend nagged him a lot. He
is always busy if I asked to see him. If
I asked to see him, but when he calls me,
I will drop everything to be with him. I don't
(01:54):
know why he's acting this way, and I pray it's
not what my subconsciousness telling me it is. In his
defense end, he does work extreme hours. He has his
kids every other weekend, and he likes to chill with
his boys to unwind. I offered to cook dinner at
his house so we could have a heart to heart,
and he said he still needs to buy furniture and
(02:14):
fix his place up before I can come over. I
need him to make me a priority in his life.
How can I get this through to him? Has our
relationship run its course, He'll never make you a priority.
He'll never do that because guess what, he already has
a priority in his life. Okay, he has a priority.
You should have titled and titled this letter for two
(02:37):
years I've been in a relationship with a married man,
because that's what it is. I mean, think about it.
You never ever get holidays. You don't get Christmas. You
don't even get his birthday, which is three days before Christmas.
You don't get New Year's Eve. You don't get New
Year's Day, well, you get a couple of hours when
he decides to come over. You don't get Valentine's Day,
(02:58):
that's the day for lovers. You don't get anything. And
he played you so hard. He told you his ex
girlfriend nagged a lot. So now you're scared, you said,
you're scared of running him off. You're scared to tell
him how you feel and what all of this means
to you, and why doesn't he spend more time with you,
and what's going on. You're scared to bring up how
(03:19):
you feel he puts you off. He's always too busy
for you. He's got the kids every other weekend, or
he's going out with his boys. You can't even go
over his house because he doesn't have any furniture, really,
and you make excuses for him at every turn. You
have to stop this talking about in his defense, he's
very busy, Yeah, busy with his wife and family running
(03:42):
away from you. You have to stop all of this.
You got to stop seeing him. You have to stop
answering his call, stop calling him, stop everything, all of
the above, because you already know what's going on. You
said it. You're subconscious. You don't want it to be
what you're subconscious is telling you that it is. Well,
that's what it is. Listen to your self conscious, all right. Please,
(04:03):
please don't be stupid on this. I mean, don't be
just don't be. Get yourself together. Listen to your head
and not your heart. In this situation, the man has
a wife. Steve, I just wow, I know how long
have we been doing these letters? Yeah? How obvious does
(04:24):
it have to be? Yeah? How many times have we
given advice on this subject? Right here? You say, my
man treats me like an afterthought. That's cause that's what
you are. See. You solved that the answer is in
the letter. I've been in relationship for two years and
(04:45):
now hear what you hear you, hear the glory of it.
When I think about the thing this man has shown
me sexually and mentally, I'm floored. Why well, let's talk
about what he didn't showed you. We don't know what
he's doing sexually, but obviously you sprung. He literally takes
my breath away. Now he go to letter. We've got
some problems though I've never spent an we've never spent
(05:05):
a night together, and I've never met his family. What
two years and you ain't been over his house? And
later on in the letters say because he ain't got
no furniture? Who take two years to get a couch?
A couch? Who have got this place? And in two
(05:27):
years ain't got a couch, ain't got no damn bad
ain't got a TV? Who been a day house for
two years without no damn cable? And somewhere that sick?
Where do he eat when he at home? What do
you mean he don't have furniture? Listen to me, And
I've never met his family except for his twin daughters
(05:50):
and named mother. And it was a quick hind by
we ran into them and talking that was an accident.
That was a damn accident. He damn show. Wasn't it
for you to meet them in? But you did? We
were not together on our one year anniversary. That's because
y'all don't have anniversary. What did you What did you
(06:10):
making up? Y'all don't have anniversary because of his job.
I didn't see him on Valentine's Day. That because you
ain't his Valentine. I'm gonna just give it to you
because he had his daughters that night. Who'll spend Valentine's
with the damn kids? Right, we're supposed to be having
(06:31):
sex on Valentine's Day? What did your kids in here? Fault?
Keep your asswa fing the dog crazy? I got the
rest of it for you when I come back, Steve,
I'm not even pulling no punches with this. Please don't.
We'll have part two Steve's response coming up at twenty
(06:52):
three minutes after the hour. You're listening, all right, Steve,
come on, let's recap today's Strawberry letter. My man treats
me like an afterthought. Well that's caused you are, and
it's all in the damn letter. Other than when y'all
having this crazy ass sex where you didn't learn so
much you on the floe. So now he literally takes
(07:16):
my breath away. But then we got some problems. She
ain't never spend the night at the man's house two years?
Why because he say he don't have no furniture yet.
My question is, who ain't bought a couch in two years?
(07:36):
I don't know where do he eat when he at home?
He just standing in the middle of the floor with
some containers. I've never met his family except for his
twin daughters and their mother. And it was a real
quick hid by we ran into them at Target. That
(07:59):
was a damn accident. Oh yeah, we were not together
on our one year anniversary. That's because y'all don't have anniversaries.
I'm just going over what I went over and then
we'll get to the rest of it. Because of his job,
I didn't see him on Valentine's Day. No, that ain't
caused his job. It's because you didn't see him on
Valentine's Day because you ain't as Valentine because he had
(08:20):
his daughters that night. Who the hell spend Valentine Night
with their kids, even if it's my week of custody.
Somebody for the watch their ass or Valentine's Night because
I got to go see somebody naked with a dipper
on with a bowling arrow Cupid. I didn't played Cupid
(08:40):
on Valentine's Day. I didn't jumped out the closet with
a dipper A long time ago. Y'all ain't know me.
Then I was young. I had the body for that dipper.
I saw him the next day and he gave me flowers.
You know why you got flowers because he spent all
(09:03):
the money on the press and the candy on the
other girl. And anybody can give you flowers, that's just stop.
They sell them on the corner. His birthday is three
days before Christmas, but I didn't see him until Christmas
Eve because his grandparents was in time. Wow, who need
four days with some old ass people that say marry Christmas?
(09:26):
Who needs full damn days with some old people that
say mary Christmas? Then there was nothing on Christmas Day
as Joe. No, no, no no, that's where you're wrong. Oh,
Christmas Day was popping. It was jis family woman. Christmas
was lit. It just wasn't with you, because who can
(09:50):
leave their house on Christmas Day? And why would he
not come over to your house on Christmas Day? He
got no damn furniture. He didn't even got a little nothing.
Sit on and look at the damn lights on the tree.
Everybody like putting the tree up, getting a cup of call,
felt some hot chocolate, looking at the tree and they
dream and then having fun. That's the purpose of a tree. Christmas. Yeah,
(10:15):
that was nothing on Christmas Day. And he went to
church on New Year's Eve without me. That man was
not in church on New Year's Eve. He was just
without you. He told you he went to church on
New Year's Eve. His ass ain't go to church on
New Year's Eve. Then he came over for a few
hours on New Year's Day to make up for it. Oh.
(10:38):
I bet that's when y'all was in the flow having
some of that mind blowing sex. I don't discuss how
I feel about things. For feel running him off because
he told me his ex girlfriend nagged him a lot.
You know why, because she was trying to figure out
how the hell you gonna come over because he had
he ain't had no furniture in this apartment for about
eight years. She wearing his asked the death about coming over,
(11:01):
and she had never spent the night over there. Okay,
he's always busy if I ask to see him, but
when he calls me, I drop everything. I don't know
why he's acting this way. What you've been with him
two years and you don't know why he acted in
this way. He can't act no other way. He got
(11:22):
a family. He got a family. He can't act no
other way. I pray is not what my suspicion is
telling me. It is stop praying for something God gives
you to protect you. You have this thing called intuition.
It's telling you. Now you want to call it yourself conscious.
(11:44):
I'm prayers, not what my self conscious is telling me.
It's your intuition and it is telling you that. And
God gives it to women to protect them. And all
of women out there listening, No, every time they go
against what their intuition tells them, they pay for Every
woman has done it. True. Now in his defense, he
(12:05):
does work extreme hours. What is he a force fighter?
Come on? What job he got where he work for
stream hours? What is he in the UFC fighter? What
is extreme hours? So he don't get no time? He
working all these hours and still can't buy no damn
(12:27):
couch and bed. But he worked extreme hours daint. He
has his kids every other weekend, and he likes to
cheer with his boys on wine. I like cheering with
my boys online too, but I'd rather be somewhere having sex.
What are you talking about? I want to cook dinner
(12:48):
at his house. He can't have you over there. Somebody
over there already cooking and they're not gonna understand you
coming over because that's they kitchen, right all right. I
need him to make me a proud in his life.
He's not. How can I get through to him? You can't.
Is our relationship run his course? You have no relationship.
That's your strawberry lever all right? Thank you, Steve. Post
(13:10):
your comments on today's Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey FM
on Instagram and Facebook, and please don't forget to check
out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand. You're listening to
this Stave Harvey Morning Show
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