Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, works, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry Letter to STEVEHARVEFM dot com and
click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your letter
live on the air, just like we're going to read
this one right here, right now, and you never know,
it could be yours.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
It could be yours. Buckle up and hold on type
we got it. Tol you here it is Strawberry.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Let up, all right, nephew, thank you. Subject. Should I
give this man a second chance? Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm
thirty three, and I'm having a hard time dating black men.
I'm running into the wrong one, so I won't say
that all black men are a trip. I was dating
a guy that I met on a blind date. He
was married to a white woman for four years, and
(00:47):
I could see why he's divorced. I shouldn't have kept
dating him after our first date. He's very confident and cocky.
He brags about working out all of the time, and
he loves talking about his two cars, his new small home.
The house has nothing to brag about. But I was
happy for him and helped him decorate the house. Three
(01:08):
months into dating, he wouldn't talk when we went on dates.
He said that I overtalk him and it's always mindless conversation.
That was quite offensive, but I kept dating him. We
started having sex, and I had to limit it to
a few days a week because I felt like we
shouldn't even be having sex before marriage. He said, that's
(01:29):
exactly why black women get left behind, because we have
too many hang ups and rules when we're dating. He's
also commented on my attitude and basically referred to me
as an angry black woman. After a waitress filled a
glass of water on me by mistake. I was shocked,
but not mad, and I was not rude to that woman.
(01:50):
I could back on the time I spent with him,
and then he ghosted me. Weeks later, he was dating
another woman and he posted her on Facebook. Was jealous
because I never got posted, so I called to tell
him that. He said he posted her to get my attention.
He said he misses me, and he asked if he
can get a second chance. I was excited at first,
(02:13):
and then I remembered how he treated me. Is it
a bad idea to give him a second chance. Yes,
it's a bad idea. I think you need to reread
your own letter that you wrote us so you can
really hear what you've said about this man, especially the
angry black woman part. This is even more offensive coming
from a black man. I'm sure with the stupid stuff
(02:36):
that was coming out of his mouth on a regular
he gave you plenty of stuff to be angry about.
I bet his ex was an angry white woman with him.
You got to ask yourself, how has he changed from
the first time around, Because you don't post yourself with
another woman. If you want to get back with someone,
you call her, you apologize, you ask for forgiveness, you
(02:58):
come bearing gifts anything other than what he did.
Speaker 3 (03:01):
I think this guy is immature.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
I think he's disrespectful, and if you take him back,
it's going to be more of the same.
Speaker 3 (03:07):
He has shown you who he is. Believe him.
Speaker 4 (03:11):
Steve Well, I agree with you, Shirley. The problem I
have with this letter is near everything.
Speaker 2 (03:21):
Just every line in it. Should I get this man
a second chance? Okay?
Speaker 4 (03:27):
Well let's see if you should. I'm thirty three. I'm
having a hard time dating black man. All right, Well,
get a white man what's get a Latino man, get
an Asian man. Go ahead, go ahead. I don't know
what y'all think. Fitna happened? We are all the same, Hey,
(03:51):
we the same? But go ahead and try it.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
I'm running it. I'm running into the wrong one.
Speaker 4 (03:58):
So I won't say that all black men on trip
you attract the wrong one, and you picked the wrong one.
I was dating a guy I met on a blind date.
He was married to a white woman for four years,
and I could see why he's divorced. So you having
trouble dating black men. H you go get a black
(04:19):
man that's having trouble dating black women. So he's married
to a white woman, and you thought, well, since he
married a white woman, let me give it a shout.
What what was your plan was you getting? Was you
gonna act more white?
Speaker 3 (04:37):
What? What?
Speaker 4 (04:37):
What was what was the thought process here? I'm just
trying to figure out what what what this got to
do with anything? I shouldn't have kept dating him after
that first date? Well why ain't you stopped?
Speaker 2 (04:50):
See? I told you, I just have a problem with everything.
In this letter. He's confident, in cocky.
Speaker 4 (04:57):
He brags about working out all the time, and he
loves talking about his two cars and his new small home. Well,
you know, he probably come from one raggedy car, and
he probably had an apartment, brun the gym all the time.
He cocky talking about working out. And now you got
two cars in a little house. Ain't no wrong with time.
(05:17):
The house has nothing to brag about. But I was
happy for him, and I helped him decorate the house.
Oh now you out there decorating a little tiny home. Okay,
oh okay, what you want?
Speaker 1 (05:30):
What?
Speaker 2 (05:30):
You had to buy one pair of curtain? That's all? What?
What what we do?
Speaker 4 (05:37):
You just bought one rug and you take your toe,
and when you using a toilet, you take your toe
and you start cooking, you take your toe and you
slide the rug over in front of the stove. And
then when you go sit on the toilet, you slide
the rug back in front of the toilet. That's how
you decorate a tiny home. You can save money. You
ain't got the Bible, you know, one you been one
(05:59):
pair of curtains?
Speaker 2 (06:00):
Doc. Okay, anyway, here we go ahead.
Speaker 4 (06:08):
And we'll come back and I'll just finish up with
what's wrong with.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
The whole lest all right, all right, we'll have part
two of your response to today's Strawberry.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
Letter Steve at twenty three minutes after the hour.
Speaker 1 (06:19):
Today's title is the subject is should I give this
man a second chance?
Speaker 3 (06:24):
We'll get back into it right after this.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Gosh, people, this is Kirk Franklin.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
Hey, this is Sakka Khan. What's going on? This is
your boy Kevin Hart?
Speaker 2 (06:31):
Hey, what up?
Speaker 3 (06:32):
This is your boy Chris Brown?
Speaker 4 (06:33):
What your boy? The Big Snoop Dogg.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
This is?
Speaker 2 (06:39):
This is your boy Sandy Entertainer.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
This is JR.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
Linda Adam less of, It's DJ Caviln.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
And you're listening to Steve Harvey Morning Show.
Speaker 4 (06:46):
There's morning shows, and there's the Greatest Steve Harvey Morning Show.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Another one.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
You're listening Steve Harvey Morning Show.
Speaker 5 (06:59):
If you're a homeowner, you know it took years of saving,
planning and hard work to get in the door then
make that house a home. Now, all that effort has
built something hugely valuable, equity. It's the portion of your
homes you truly own that can be tapped to fun
what's next? And Rocket Mortgage is here to help you
turn your home's equity into cash fund your next drink.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
With Rocket Mortgage.
Speaker 5 (07:18):
Visit Rocket mortgage dot com today to find out more.
Rocket Mortgage LLC license in fifty states. N MLS Consumer
Access dot Org number thirty thirty.
Speaker 1 (07:28):
All right, come on, Steve, let's recap today's strawberry letter.
The subject is should I give this man a second chance?
Speaker 4 (07:35):
Well, since I started this letter, I found nothing redeeming
in this letter, So let's just go through it real
quickly and to get to the end.
Speaker 2 (07:43):
Should you just give him a second chance? Thirty three?
Speaker 4 (07:47):
You're having a hard time dating black men, Okay, I said, so, well,
go get another one, white Latino Asian.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Just go get another I won't say that all black men.
Speaker 4 (07:58):
In the trip, I was dating a guy met on
the black He was married to a white woman for
four years, and I can see why he's divorced. Oh okay,
So since you having trouble dating black men, you decided
to date another black man that didn't like black women.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
And that's not that. Maybe he found love in this
white lady. I don't know.
Speaker 4 (08:17):
You can find love anywhere. I guess so, but I
don't know why you put this in the letter. So okay,
nice try Oh I shouldn't have kept dating him after
our first date right there?
Speaker 2 (08:29):
Why did you keep dating him? Then?
Speaker 4 (08:31):
Okay, he's confident in cocky brags about working out all
the time. He loved talking about his two cars and
his new small home. He got a tiny house and
got two calls. Okay, said, but you you were happy
for him, and you helped him decorate the house. Don't
take long, don't take long. Tiny houses just need one
throw rug and you just pull it with your toe
around the house and let it be the rug whoever
(08:53):
you like. You you want a rug to get out
the bed, just pull it with your toe for about
me in front of the toilet, and you can step
out on the floor. Be You could take that same
toe and drag it in front of the shower, and
now you step out on that same rug right after
the shower. And then you go in there to cook.
Just take your toe and pull that rug right over
in front of that stove and start cooking. And then
(09:14):
it's time to eat. Take the other toe and drag
it by your chair, and now you could eat barefoot
by the tape. It's so beautiful. There's a lot of
advantages of tiny houses. You're crazy, but you're gonna have
to get your toes worked on. You're gonna have to
get your toe strip up because that's how you pull
that rug around.
Speaker 3 (09:32):
Work your toes. You need to go to the gym.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
Yeah, that big toe.
Speaker 4 (09:35):
You got to make that big toe strong because you
get a cramp in it if you ain't careful. And anyway,
and then I told him, y'all was going out for
three months and he wouldn't talk on the dates. He said,
you over talked to him in that and with mindless
conversation and that was offensive. But you kept dating him
(09:57):
and I started having sex with him, and I had
to limit it to a few days a week because
I felt like we shouldn't even.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Be having sex before marriage.
Speaker 4 (10:04):
Did you tell him that this is just something you
came up with, because because he was busy, seemed like
you had to cut him down. And then anyway, he said,
that's exactly why black women get left behind, because we
got too many hang ups and rules when we dating.
But he was married to the white lady and he
got a divorce, so maybe it's him, Yeah, maybe it's him.
(10:27):
He also commented on my attitude and basically referred to
me as an angry black woman after a waitress spilled
a glass of water on me by mistake. I was shocked,
but not mad, and was not rude to that woman.
I cut back on the time I spent with him,
and then he ghosted me. One weeks later he was
dating another one. He put another lady. He put that
on Facebook. I got jealous. I called him and I
(10:47):
told him, you ain't never post me. He said, he
posted her to get my attention. Well, where did he
lose your phone number?
Speaker 1 (10:57):
Exactly?
Speaker 4 (11:00):
He said, he misses me and asked if he can
get a second chance. I was excited at first, and
then I remembered how he treated me. Is it a
bad idea to give him a second chance? A second
chance to do what you did? Not give this man one.
Speaker 2 (11:15):
Redeeming quality in this thof he cocky and confidence.
Speaker 4 (11:19):
He brag about working out, He brag about them two cards,
bragging about that tiny house. You stitt up in that
tiny house, trying to act like it ain't tiny. You
can see the TV from everywhere in the house. You
in bed, watching TV, cooking, watching the same TV show.
(11:44):
Can't put two TVs, and it ain't in no walls
in the tiny house. For no two TVs. We all
got to watch his one TV. Now you're in the
bathroom watching the same TV. I'm over here trying to
fight his chicken, and you were in here with that
dough crack looking at if you don't shut this though, So, lady,
(12:06):
I don't know a second chance to do what right?
But you got excited and then you remembered. You remember
that it didn't work you. Did you remember that you
should have stopped dating him after the first date.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Did you remember that he called you an angry black woman?
Speaker 4 (12:23):
Did you remember that he told you that's why black
women get left behind, because y'all got too many rules
and hang ups. He gonna bring them same concerns back
with it. Stop listen to me, ladies. Stop being tired
of being alone. Stop being tired of it makes you desperate,
(12:45):
because in your alone time is your repair time.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
In your alone time is.
Speaker 4 (12:55):
Your time to receive everything else God have for you
that you will blocking by being in the wrong relationship.
God got something fun you. You just got to be
able to let something go, that's true. And you know
the hardest thing to let go of your past?
Speaker 3 (13:17):
Amen to that, all right?
Speaker 4 (13:20):
And that's the one thing that will keep you from
having a bright future. So going back there and get
you a little mister.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
Leave your comments on today's.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Two cars in front of the house. You can't even
see that.
Speaker 1 (13:37):
Living on Instagram and Facebook and Steve Harvey f M.
Check us out on the Strawberry Letter podcast too. It's
on the free iHeartRadio app. You're listening to the Steve
Harvey Morning Show.