Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
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Speaker 2 (00:19):
And Moore. And you're going to love this part.
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(00:47):
that's I can't wait for them. It sounds fun, fun, fun. Yeah,
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for today's Strawberry Letter. And if you need advice relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting,
and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM
(01:08):
dot com. That's STEVEHARVEYFM dot com and click submit Strawberry Letter.
We could be reading your letter live on the air,
just like we're going to read this one right here,
right now, and you never know, it could be yours.
Speaker 3 (01:21):
It could be yours. Buckle up and hold on tight.
We got it for you here it is strawberry.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
Let us thank you, nep you subject. Why is he
trying to finesse my fineness? Dear Stephen Shirley, I've met
a man that is controlling, but I like him a lot.
He has some great characteristics that would make him a
good husband. He's thirty eight and I'm thirty seven. He
checks off all the boxes as far as having a
(01:45):
promising career, his own house, and he has a big,
loving family. He is a personal stylist for an upscale store,
and he has several private female clients. He said he
loved my style when we met, and he inspired me
to get my haircut and get some highlights. The only
problem I'm having with him now is that he's treating
(02:07):
me like I'm one of his clients. And it's like
he's memorized my entire closet to the point where he
tells me what he'd like for me to wear when
we go out. He'll suggest that I wear yellow if
he is wearing yellow, and he'll say what shoes I
should wear with the outfit. If I don't take his suggestions,
he comments on my choices when.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
He picks me up.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
It's annoying, and I've told him politely that I'm not
one of his clients. Then there's the problems we have
at the gym that's where we met after he came
over and corrected me on using a machine improperly. Now
he makes comments on what exercises I should do to
get the body type that he desires. I told this
(02:48):
boy I was fine when he met me, and I
don't need him to finesse my fineness that goes for
in the gym and in my closet. It would be
a shame if the table's turned and I start directing
him in the bedroom and telling him what kind of
loving that I desire. I am starting to think he
sees me as one of his projects that he wants
to make perfect.
Speaker 2 (03:09):
I'm my own person.
Speaker 1 (03:10):
And I want to continue to get to know him,
but he needs to relax on all of his unwanted opinions.
Is this a character flaw? Should we break up or
can this be fixed?
Speaker 2 (03:22):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (03:23):
I think he needs to get him some business. You're
definitely not his project or his client. He needs some kids,
he needs a pet or something like that. If he
wants to tell people what to do and what to
wear and how to work out of the gym, you're
a grown woman. And he is controlling and who he is,
that's who he is.
Speaker 2 (03:44):
This is who he is.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
He wants you to work out a certain way so
you can get the body he desires.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
What about the body you're already.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
In the gym. He's just too much. You said you're
your own person. I hope you don't budge on this.
Remind him again who you are and that you were
already fine. And that's why he hollered at you in
the first place in the gym. Remember that. Tell him
you know how to dress already. You say you like him,
you want to continue to get to know him, but
(04:14):
please don't be fooled. I mean, this is what you're
gonna get. You're gonna get a controlling man who thinks
he can boss you around. If you don't want a
controlling man, this man is not the one for you.
The first line in your letter was that he is controlling.
The last line is can it be fixed? It doesn't
sound like it can be fixed, because that's how he is,
(04:34):
like I said, But it depends on whether he wants
to be fixed or not, or he understands that what
he's doing is not cool, it's annoying you. And it
depends on if he cares that this is a major
problem for you. One thing's for sure is he can
only do this to you as long as you let him,
or until you leave him.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Steve, it's a good letter.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
It is.
Speaker 3 (04:54):
It is, you know, well, it is really a good letter.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
So I'm try, please try, Steve.
Speaker 3 (05:02):
You know, you know what.
Speaker 4 (05:03):
They call in for help, But sometimes I just, you know,
some days I just don't feel like helping nobody.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
But she does need help because he's on her nervous
with all of this, and that.
Speaker 4 (05:14):
Today ain't a real help for day for me will
help her, you know, I need help, my damn sir.
I don't see nobody talking about Steve needything was wrong Steve.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
She's a metal woman. Oh that's right here.
Speaker 4 (05:28):
I call he met a man that's controlling, but she
likes him a lot. He's got a lot of great characteristics.
He's thirty eight, you thirty seven. Check off all the boxes,
got a promising career, got his own house, got a big,
loving family. He's a personal stylist for an upscale store,
and he's got a lot of female clients. So now
(05:50):
he's talked to you about your hand and kind of
made you change it. The thing that's happening, though, is
kind of lonely problem you haven't you say. He can
kind of memorize your whole closet. So when y'all go out,
if he wearing yellow, he'll call and tell you to
wear yeller and tell you what shoes wear. But then
if you get if you don't want to wear that,
which what shoes wear should be a feeling, you know.
(06:13):
Sometimes you know, I got a stylist, he pick a
lot of stuff out.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
I go, I ain't winning it now.
Speaker 4 (06:18):
I throw his little last into suthing, you know, because
all them they fragile. I throw his a little last
into something. But you're just gonna be a little broken
ass boy today.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
As far as I'm concerned, because I'm not worried. How
about that, Well.
Speaker 4 (06:32):
I just wanted to share with you that that's what
happens here when you deal with these people.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
That I'll tell you how to cope it.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
Well, thank you for giving her some help. We'll have
part two of your response Steve coming up at twenty
three minutes after the hour. Today's strawberry letter, subject why
is he trying to finesse my fineness? We'll get back
into it right after this. You're listening Steve Harvey Morning Show.
All right, Steve, come on, let's recap today's strawberry letter,
(06:58):
the subject why is he trying to the next my fineness?
Speaker 4 (07:03):
Well, she'd have met this guy the Dayton. He's thirty
and she served seven. He checks off all the blocks
he's controlling. But she likes the man a lot, got
his own house, got his own business, got a great career,
great family. He's a stylist at an upscale store. He's
got several female clients. He's convinced her to change her
(07:24):
hair a little bit. She kind of like a little.
Speaker 3 (07:26):
Bit of advice.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
But he's the problem is he just start memorizing her
whole wardrobe now, and like, if he's gonna wear yellow,
he'll tell her to wear yellow. And when she don't
want to wear that, which will what you're wearing should
be a feeling that day She'll come out in something else,
and then he'll be picking on her choices. He'll be
commenting on her choices. And you know, and you've been
(07:51):
annoyed by this, and you've politely told him I'm not
one of your clients. And then y'all got another problem
because y'all at the gym. Now the way y'all met
at the gym where you were using the machining correctly,
he came over and corrected. Now every time y'all go
to the gym, he telling you what machine to use
so you can sculpt the body that he wants.
Speaker 3 (08:14):
He want. Now, is he taking it too far? Of
course he is.
Speaker 4 (08:19):
And then you told him that when you met at him,
he met you, you was fine and you don't need
him to finesse your fineness.
Speaker 3 (08:27):
I like put that system, yes.
Speaker 4 (08:30):
And that goes for in the gym and then my closet.
Then you thought about, well, I could hurt him if
I started giving him instructions on how I wanted to
be loved in the bedroom. See, now you're gonna sting
his ass. You're gonna sting it. Well, you know since
we passed out instruction all that. Who how high you
(08:51):
think you doing?
Speaker 2 (08:51):
It?
Speaker 3 (08:51):
Ain't really all that?
Speaker 4 (08:52):
Who who? How?
Speaker 3 (08:54):
You know you need to change some things?
Speaker 4 (08:58):
And she says, I think he sees me is one
of his projects he wants to make perfectly.
Speaker 3 (09:03):
I'm my own person.
Speaker 4 (09:04):
I want to continue to get to know him, but
he needs to relax on all his unwanted opinions. Is
this a character flaws? Should we break up? Or can
can this be fixed? This can be fixed. He's probably
a great die. He doesn't even realize he's being annoying.
He has a job where people pay him for his opinion,
(09:24):
but he brings the job home. That's the problem. He
brings the job home. And so now he's treating you,
like you say, as a client, and you don't want that.
You want a relationship with the man. You don't want
a client subordinate relationship. You don't want Tom I'm paying
(09:46):
for your services. No, I want to have relationship. So
you got to sit him down and have this conversation,
and the conversation should have those talking points in it.
I just feel like nothing I do is good ano
for you. I know you are paid to give your
opinion and to style people, but sometimes I just want
(10:06):
to wear what I want to wear. Now if you're
unhappy with the way I dress, then maybe you need
to start seeing somebody else. Because of wearing exactly what
you want me to wear a premium importance to you,
and you're going to be unhappy with my own selections.
I think we should part ways now. I don't want
to do this because I think you're a great guy.
(10:27):
But I also think that this can work out if
you would just allow me to be me and you
accept me for me. Now, if I ask your opinion,
I would love to hear what you have to say.
But if I don't ask it, then I'm very happy
with the selection I made, and I would like you
to compliment me on it. And this is where he
got to put his big boy pants on. How many times, Felas,
(10:50):
do you have to tell your girl she look good
and something when she don't? All she just don't all
the time, and we do it all the damn time.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
Sorry, you like it? I love it? I love your paper.
Oh yeah that's beautiful. Yeah, you look you look crazy.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
It's makes me look just.
Speaker 4 (11:06):
Looking just smack check asked crazy. Hell yeah, look you
make you you said before you put your dress on.
Speaker 2 (11:13):
You better not say it though?
Speaker 1 (11:16):
No, Hm, anybody won't do over these three guys, y'all
do what y'all say it all the time.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
Maybe look good.
Speaker 4 (11:26):
I don't say none wrong, My baby look good, nothing wrong.
Speaker 1 (11:29):
That's very smart of you, very good looking, all three
of them very good.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
I'm on newly wed. What you got newly?
Speaker 3 (11:37):
I said?
Speaker 2 (11:37):
I said the same thing times I said, you look good, baby?
Speaker 3 (11:39):
What you put on? I said all the time, look good?
Now the person over there with a microphone and it doesn't.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
And what stee?
Speaker 3 (11:49):
Do I look fat in this?
Speaker 4 (11:50):
No?
Speaker 3 (11:51):
No, no, you don't look fatty.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
But what are you saying to yourself though under your breath?
Speaker 3 (11:55):
Or you want the truth?
Speaker 4 (11:57):
Yeah? You look fat with your dress, you look fat
in your pennies. My god, but my kind of fat.
And this is the fat I like, Oh baby, that's beautiful.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
But on the.
Speaker 4 (12:17):
Inside, I know that's my kind of fat anyway, So
I like, you know you have to be honest, but
you have to be not honest in order to keep
the relationship. I want you, Yeah, you have to.
Speaker 3 (12:34):
You can't tell the truth, baby, baby? Do you like
my hair?
Speaker 1 (12:39):
What?
Speaker 4 (12:39):
Hell?
Speaker 3 (12:39):
Which one you're talking about? Yours are the one you bought?
What you need which hell you want me to like?
I have a question.
Speaker 4 (12:46):
Oh you want me to like the whole hairstyle, then
it's cool. But if you're asking me if I like
the head of yours or the one in the bag,
I haven't really decided.
Speaker 1 (12:55):
What's your comments on today's Strawberry Letter and Steve you.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
Can hide them blue marks. I know that on.
Speaker 1 (13:01):
Instagram, Facebook, and check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on
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Speaker 2 (13:07):
You can download it right now.
Speaker 3 (13:09):
The tracks for showing coming.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
Up in forty six minutes after the hour, we got
Junior here with Sports Talk.
Speaker 2 (13:14):
Right after this, you're listening Harvey Morning Show