A True Tangent

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
All right, let's do a tangent, shall we. I don't
know what we'll make this quick. I'm tired today. I'm
already tired. It's only Monday. I'm already tired. Like, how
can that be?

Speaker 2 (00:08):
It's hard.

Speaker 1 (00:09):
I got a lot of rest yesterday. But no, it's
been a lot yesterday. I did nothing. I was alone.
I was on my own.

Speaker 2 (00:15):
You don't want to come over.

Speaker 1 (00:16):
Oh I wasn't invited, so I kind of do anything either.

Speaker 2 (00:18):
But I would have invited you.

Speaker 1 (00:19):
I thank you. I appreciate that. No, it's hard to
know when to come over my door.

Speaker 3 (00:31):
Calen has seen my door and it is revolving people
and people out.

Speaker 2 (00:35):
It's friend's nightmare, it really is.

Speaker 1 (00:37):
You guys can come over. I just need notice. I
need like several weeks. No, No, you guys can come
over whenever you want. But I wouldn't say that my
house is the hangout house, you know. I wouldn't say
the neighbors are you know. I wouldn't say it's an
open door policy for the old neighbors and just stop
on buy whenever they feel like it.

Speaker 2 (00:56):
No, it's not like friends.

Speaker 1 (00:57):
No. So I live in a high rise and I'm
the who like, I will try, like, if there are
other people walking towards the elevator behind me, I'll try
and time the walk so that I don't have to
be in the elevator with other people. You can do
the same thing.

Speaker 4 (01:10):
I say, No, Mike does this, like.

Speaker 1 (01:12):
I just if I can avoid it, and I'm not
gonna let slam in your face. But I will absolutely
pretend like there's nobody about thirty feet behind me, and
then there's there are four elevators, right, you can get
your own elevator. Everything will be fine. But I'm not
gonna stand there and hold the elevator so that I
can talk to some stranger. No, I'm not. Mike does
this too.

Speaker 4 (01:31):
It's so bad. It's with the neighbors.

Speaker 5 (01:34):
Like we don't live it in like a high rise
where we live in houses, so there are you know, houses.

Speaker 4 (01:38):
Next to us.

Speaker 5 (01:38):
But if we're like leaving and we're walking to the
car and he sees a neighbor going to get in
the car, he'll want to wait to pull out of
the driveway so we don't drive by them. So he
has to wave, like he doesn't even want to wave
through a window at the neighbors.

Speaker 1 (01:53):
I just like solitude, you know, I like solitude, and
I feel like I use a lot of my social
energy here. I'm an introvert by nature, and I use
a lot of what I got right here, and I
leave it all on the field, okay, and then I
walk out of here and there's not much left. And
so what I'm not trying to do is then have
a random conversation with a stranger. I'm just not so

(02:16):
I'm not. Guys, I want to play a clip for you.
I mean, it's actually kind of serious for once on
the tangent, but this is absolutely fucking frightening. And I
really hope this woman is not for real. But this
went viral last week and it was shared on x
by Daily Loud. But this is what it says. HIV

(02:38):
positive woman explains why she does not tell people that
she has the STD Why and this is a quote
from her Why should I have to disclose? Your health
is your priority? Now? That is true. However, if you
have what could potentially be a deadly disease, it would
be really nice of you to let people know, oh

(03:00):
before they engage, Because while I would agree that you know, yeah,
you should be responsible for yourself and your own will
being and not count on somebody else to tell you
the truth. I also think it's pretty fucking shitty if
you have something that's communicable and you don't tell someone
that you have it. I do believe that you have

(03:20):
that obligation as a decent human being to protect other
people from the thing that you got from somebody, probably unknowingly.
So then why would you do that to somebody else
on purpose?

Speaker 2 (03:31):
Shouldn't she get jail time for this?

Speaker 1 (03:33):
That's what I thought. I don't know that this isn't
a crime. Actually I really don't like I actually don't know.
But listen here she is this lady.

Speaker 6 (03:40):
I'm HIV positive, right, and this is just a PSA
to those that are not HIV positive. Disclosure is my
choice when I disclose, and how I disclose and who
I disclosed to is up to me. I find it
so crazy how people are telling me that I need
to disclose before I go on a date, that I
need to disclose before I kiss somebody. This is the

(04:00):
craziest one. Before I even tell them my name. It's
not happening. I don't think that it's my responsibility to
tell someone that I'm HIV positive. If they are treating
me as if I'm not, your health is your responsibility?
Adopt the mindset of medical practitioners. Assume that everyone has
something until they prove to you that they do not.

(04:21):
Why are you kissing a stranger or trying to kiss
a stranger that you just met. Why are you trying
to have intercourse with someone raw that you just met.
You don't know me from a hole in a wall.
Why are you trying to put your thing inside of
me without any kind of protection? Why do I have
to be the one to say, hey, chill out, I'm
HIV positive instead of you asking taking the time to

(04:42):
know me, get to know me, Let's go get tested together.
If you want to take the next step, Why do
I have to be the one protecting you from yourself?

Speaker 1 (04:49):
Because you know you have something right now? If I'm irresponsible,
you and you don't know, and we're both collectively irresponsible,
that's one thing. But you know, so you're just gonna
let somebody expose themselves to that, even if they're an
idiot like you. Don't you don't believe that you have
any responsibility as somebody who knows that you could potentially

(05:14):
pass on to someone a deadly disease. Now is that
person an idiot? Maybe? But like, if you have that knowledge,
I guess I don't know why you're not sharing, right.

Speaker 7 (05:23):
And if you're judging someone for hugging up with you
without a condom, you're also involved in that, Like you're
also doing that just match.

Speaker 1 (05:30):
She's acting as though she's a bystander. Like. No, I
certainly hope that if any of that activity is taking place,
that you're consenting to it and you're doing it too.
So who kisses a random I don't know. Why are
we having this conversation? I guess you do, right, I guess,
I mean, I do you know what I mean? But
it's just and I would agree, you know, I mean,
we've all probably done stupid things when it comes to that,

(05:52):
but I would agree. You know you have to be done.
But now you have to be that much more careful
because apparently you've got folks out there. I'm not saying
it's everybody, because I don't think it is, but you
got folks out there like this who don't think that
they owe anybody anything. Now, do I think you have
to tell somebody when you match them on a dating app? No?
Do I think that you have to tell them in
the course of getting to know someone. No, But do
I think you have a moral and ethical obligation and

(06:14):
tell someone when it gets to the point of physical contact, Hey,
I have something that could hurt you. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.

Speaker 3 (06:22):
I wouldn't even say just getting to know them off
the app, Like if we're starting to have text conversation
about hooking up or hanging out, I think that's the
perfect time to be like, Hey, just so.

Speaker 1 (06:31):
You clear, I've had more than one person in my
dating life over twenty five years tell me that they
had her pies and that was nice of them. And
it didn't happen like when we matched or when we met.
It was more like, hey, this is heading in that direction.
I need you to know what you're up against. And
then I chose in both cases not to It wasn't
something that I was it was I barely knew the person.

(06:52):
It was like, I don't know. I mean, I suppose
if I if there was a ton of context and
I thought maybe I was going to marry this or
I don't know, I don't know in what world it
would happen. But I'm not saying that I disqualified this
human being as a person. I just I wasn't willing
to take that risk for myself, and it was early
in the process and we parted ways. But I was

(07:13):
very grateful in both examples that the person was upfront,
because I apparently there are people out there who are
not and I would think, how many times are you
honest and how many times do you do the right
thing and people say it's not for me before maybe
you're no longer incentivized to do that, because well, I'm
tired of being rejected and that sucks. That must suck,

(07:35):
especially considering a lot of people it happened unbeknownst to them,
it happened from in loving partnerships. Even like I'm not
blaming the person who had happened too, It's not something
when I if I've been out with you once and
I'm not sure where it's going. It's an added layer
that I'm not sure I'm prepared for for me. But
I appreciate the transparency, and I always thank the person
like I'm always very I say always. In both examples,

(07:59):
it was like, I just want to stop and say,
that was very brave of you to say that, And
I'm very grateful that you did. The conversation goes just
like that because it must really suck.

Speaker 2 (08:07):
Yeah, you don't want to shame them after no vulnerable
to tell you that, no.

Speaker 1 (08:11):
And you know, look, there there is really no shame.
I mean, these things happen and I'm sorry it happened
to you, and I'm sorry it's happened to people, and
it's just I'm not sure that that's a risk I'm
willing to take. You know, after just getting to know someone,
very very early in the process of getting to know someone.

Speaker 2 (08:25):
There's actually a guy on TikTok that I really admire.

Speaker 7 (08:28):
He goes live and he says, I am hurties positive,
ask any questions you want to, let's make this an
open dialogue. And I really admired his strength and I
thought that was awesome and it was fascinating to me,
and like, yeah, we could all have this mentality like
you know, hurt people, hurt people, or I.

Speaker 2 (08:45):
Don't owe anyone anything.

Speaker 7 (08:46):
But imagine if we all operated like that in life,
you know what I mean. I mean, there is like
human decency and someone did that to you and you
didn't want that, so I don't know that would be
very hard for me to live with myself doing that. Now,
I can't imagine to or to begin to imagine what
it's like to have to live with something like that.

Speaker 2 (09:05):
And it wasn't your fault. But let's not just hurt
people because we were.

Speaker 1 (09:10):
Hurt, right, you know, right? And I will say I
over the years, and a lot of years, I mean,
I guess when I was much much younger, I was
of the impression that it was only sort of people
involved in risky activity that got that kind of stuff,
you know, like it was you were just out here
just hoeing it up, not being safe, not being careful,

(09:31):
only to find out I know people personally who have
encountered this kind of stuff within the confines of a
loving partnership. Either their partner didn't know, their partner cheated,
their partner did know and just didn't tell them, and
that's fucked up, you know. So I guess it's not
fair to place a stigma on people for whom this

(09:52):
has happened, But I will put a stigma on that
person because I do believe that, Okay, it happened. So
then you've got to tell people. You can't just let
me walk into that like that's not fair. I'm sorry
that happened to you, but you can't just how can
you just lay there and granted everyone's you know, responsible
for their own health and well being, but if you
knew that something was going to hurt someone potentially, why

(10:14):
would you let them? Why would you allow that to
happen to them?

Speaker 2 (10:17):
Yeah, and it's like tough, you know.

Speaker 7 (10:19):
Okay, so you could say the only way to protect
yourself is to be one hundred percent you know where
kind of every time. But it's just like, you know,
if someone discovers they're an alcoholic or something like, it's
not fair that like I could try my first sip
of alcohol and be completely fine, where another person, you know,
tries it and they have a lifelong disease. So I
think it's like, I don't know, it's kind of similar
to that where it's like, Okay, we're gonna pretend like
no one's ever let their guard down or made a

(10:41):
quote unquote mistake and you're hooking up with someone and
you don't ask the questions or you're in the heat
of the moment, Like it's not fair to just blame
people for doing that. You know.

Speaker 1 (10:50):
I don't know, but I think even if I'm being safe,
I still think you have an obligation to tell me. Yeah,
if you know you've got something of any kind for
sure that could hurt me. Still, I don't think you
have to you have to. Look, I mean, even if
I am being careful and taking precautions, precaution, precaution, precaution,
whatever it is.

Speaker 2 (11:09):
Yeah, it's like the damn measles thing at Michigan State.

Speaker 7 (11:13):
I saw a doctor posting where my sister goes that
like they someone had measles in their office and he
was doing the contact tracing like he was like, I'm
not saying who this person is, but I'm going to
read all the places that they were and you should
get checked out.

Speaker 2 (11:26):
You know. It's just I feel like you have an obligation.

Speaker 1 (11:29):
But yeah, I think if you've got any anything that
could be sexually transmitted or otherwise, I mean, shit, if
I've got pneumonia right and I'm out here, like you know,
making out with somebody, I should probably give you, hey,
heads up, i haven't been feeling well this week, or
hey heads up, I'm just getting over something like because
maybe maybe what what wasn't a big deal for me
will wind up being a big deal for you. Yes, sir,

(11:50):
you know what I mean. And it happens in this
room all the time. One person gets sick, we talk
about it like, hey, what do you got and what's
going on? And you know, should you come in? Should
you not come in? Because it is it worth exposing
you know whatever, sore throat, whatever it is, neurovirus to
everybody in the room. And the answer oftentimes just know
it's not just don't come to work. It's no big deal.
I think that's fair. Yeah, I agree, put this lady

(12:12):
out here just it's not it's not cool, And I agree,
like you are responsible for yourself, right, Like if you're
just doing stupid stuff, then maybe bad things will happen.
I don't know. But if I know that something bad
could happen and I and I don't say, hey, maybe
we should be more careful here because heads up, then
that's fucked up.

Speaker 7 (12:30):
And I have seen people too over getting something and win.
I mean, if you knowingly happy.

Speaker 1 (12:35):
We've done stories about it, like celebrities are supposedly have
been suited because they knew yep, and God forbid. The
person who doesn't know and then still transmits to somebody,
because you know, there's stuff that can lie dormant within
you forever. But then it's it's you know, more sensitive
in other people. And you know, bear people who have
herpes that don't even know it because they've never had
an outbreak ever, and so there they could be unknowingly

(12:57):
giving it to someone. And but again, if you know
you have herpes, if you know you have HIV, if
you know you have whatever, I think you have an
obligation to say that. And I'm sorry for those people
because again, you're going to get there, there's going to
be various reactions that are going to be hurtful to you. Yeah,
and that sucks and that's not fair, But I don't

(13:17):
think that negates your obligation to share with people. But
you got that going on.

Speaker 3 (13:21):
I think you're like fucking with somebody's health, you.

Speaker 1 (13:23):
Know, so I definitely fucking with someone.

Speaker 3 (13:26):
I think that's why it's very important if I can
tell you that I have a cold, like I should
tell you that I have this if we're going to
be intimate, because like you said, you don't know how
it's going to affect that person's body or whatever.

Speaker 1 (13:36):
Or whatever it might be, right, right. Some things is
not as simple as I say simple. But it's not
just okay, you're going to have this this, these outbreaks
or whatever like it's in some people the HPV and
these kind of things become cancerous. So if you knew,
if you knew, now that being said, a lot of
guys are carrying HPV, I think, I think, isn't it.
I don't. I'm not a physician currently, I'm not licensed
right now. I'm working to get my license back. But

(13:59):
most men have it, but yeah, don't most men have
some strain of HPV and don't and we'll never know
and don't know, and there's no test, no, and some
and most people will never know. So I know that
most women get guarda cel and that kind of thing.

Speaker 7 (14:11):
And can you get gardasil too, now, uh okay, yeah,
but it says approximately forty five percent of male adults
ages eighteen to fifty nine in the US have HPV.

Speaker 1 (14:20):
I wonder if you have to be pretty young to
get gardas seil, because I would imagine if you already
have it, the Guardasil is not going to help you.

Speaker 7 (14:25):
I asked when I got it, They asked, you know,
are you already sexually active.

Speaker 2 (14:31):
But I do know that men can.

Speaker 7 (14:32):
Get guard to CEL and it's important. You know, if
I had a son, is that the.

Speaker 3 (14:35):
Three shot one? Because we got that when I was
what eleven twelve? Yeah, it was definitely not active, but
I thought that was really young. But I get it
now sure as an adult. For sure, I get that.

Speaker 7 (14:44):
Well just because of you know, they don't show symptoms typically,
so correct.

Speaker 1 (14:49):
Yeah, looking up to see what the qualifications are for men,
because I've never it's never been offered to me.

Speaker 2 (14:54):
Yeah, it's like a new or thing.

Speaker 1 (14:55):
I mean, I'm also maybe they just think it's a
lost cause, know you, you've been a little busy, so I'm
trying to me. This doesn't seem to right.

Speaker 3 (15:09):
Yeah, yeah, fun, Yeah, literally, I don't think you guys.

Speaker 2 (15:12):
Nothing would happen.

Speaker 1 (15:13):
Vaccination is not recommended for anyone older than twenty six.
Oh wow, this is from the CDC. Now again, I
don't know. Male. Female doesn't seem to specify here.

Speaker 2 (15:22):
Well, you're right, if you already have it, like.

Speaker 1 (15:23):
Yeah, then it would be a good Yeah. So I
wonder if maybe now it's become what they do for
people much younger who maybe aren't active yet. Who haven't
been exposed to it.

Speaker 7 (15:32):
Yeah, and that's important because a lot of people are
getting throw cancer from it.

Speaker 2 (15:35):
Yeah, you know what I mean, a lot of men
are getting throat cancer.

Speaker 4 (15:39):
So I can do something to us if you do.

Speaker 7 (15:41):
An act on a woman, Oh you wouldn't just get
throw cancer having each PV.

Speaker 2 (15:45):
You have to do that act to someone who.

Speaker 4 (15:47):
Has it probably won't happen to me.

Speaker 2 (15:50):
Maybe when as you know, never say never a right, Oh.

Speaker 1 (15:56):
Oh wow, okay, is it too late now to say sorry?

Speaker 4 (16:02):
What do you mean?

Speaker 1 (16:05):
Baby? Baby? Baby?

Speaker 3 (16:08):
You never do?

Speaker 1 (16:12):
I think. I just remember I saw this last week
and I was like, oh my god, like, oh my god,
Like this is where we're at with people. It's yeah,
I have a deadly disease and it sucks for me.
But fuck you if you're not gonna you know, but again, like,
are you as a sexual partner, are you just laying
there just watching this happen like you know? I mean, no,
you're an active participant, like you are not. You are

(16:34):
culpable here, you know what I'm saying, Like, you're this
is not an activity that is that is being for
hopefully being forced upon you. You know, if you're going
out with someone and you're choosing to engage in sexual
intercourse with them, then you are not just your hands
are dirty on this, you know what I mean. Yes,
I'm responsible too. I mean for me to say, well,
I have no responsibility if I have unprotected sex with someone,

(16:55):
but I would argue that if I have unprotected sex
with someone who knowingly has HIV, like, that's a huge problem.
Why would you? Why would you do that to somebody?

Speaker 7 (17:04):
Yeah, And it's also like you know, if you do
tell someone, it's not always going to be a no.
I have friends who do have herpies. Unfortunately someone didn't
tell them and gave it to them. And I've had
you know, one of my friends is dating someone who
doesn't have it and they figured it out and there's
medication and everything.

Speaker 1 (17:19):
So and the same can be true for HAV. I mean,
you know, Matthew Johnson stayed married right for all those
years and I know now it could be undetectable and
all that stuff. So it's not like an automatic no.
I mean, I'm sure for a lot of people it's
a no. But I still think that I don't know
how I could live. I don't know how I'll just
put it. I'll put it in my own terms. I
don't know how I could live with myself knowing that

(17:41):
I had something and was exposing people to it because
they were choosing to be careless too. Like it's just
like that doesn't I don't think that negates your obligation morally.

Speaker 7 (17:51):
No, No, I feel like it speaks to a selfishness
that is getting more and more prevalent in the world.

Speaker 2 (17:55):
And I think that that's a bummer.

Speaker 1 (17:56):
I mean, it would be like if I'm I mean,
I'm being dramatic here, but be like if I'm standing
on a street corner and I'm washing someone walk into
traffic who can't see or hear or doesn't know that
they're doing it, and it's like no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
hold on, you know what I mean, Like, no, I'm
gonna grab your arm. I'm gonna pull you back and
be and you can get mad at me if you
want to. But it's like, hey, I didn't, I don't
know if you saw that. I don't want you to

(18:17):
get hurt, you know, Like that's that's what we do,
is like fellow humans. I mean, but can you imagine
is standing there and watching someone just walk into traffic
and you're like, well, it wasn't me. You should have
looked both ways. Not my problem, right, It's like, no,
that's just I don't it's I feel like it's sad
if that's what we're headed where it says, not my problem.

Speaker 7 (18:37):
Yeah, I mean, and by the way, we have all
the sympathy in the world for anyone dealing with anything
that you know that they got unbeknownst to them, you know,
without knowing it was coming to them.

Speaker 1 (18:47):
But I mean, but my guess is the vast majority
of people, if for some reason that applies to you
unfortunately that you would that you would disclose because it's
the right thing to do, if you know. So anyway
I saw that, I was like, holy shit, yeah that's
I Also. I also am, you know, no longer sexually active.
I've decided I've just I just tape it up now
and I.

Speaker 2 (19:09):
Behind like a vagina you know, you know?

Speaker 4 (19:14):
Or is it looking back at you? I can't do that?

Speaker 1 (19:19):
What do I wrap it? Look? You know? I don't.

Speaker 6 (19:23):
I don't.

Speaker 1 (19:24):
I don't think I don't. I'm better than average, but
I'm certainly not wrapping this thing around my body. Or something.
It ain't like that, all right, I ain't tying this
thing and knots all right. I mean I'm doing okay
for myself, but like it's not to the point where
you know, yeah it's the water. That was an improv
game that I just didn't know where to go.

Speaker 2 (19:48):
Who's in your dream?

Speaker 1 (19:49):
Like I just admitted to tucking and taping all day.

Speaker 4 (19:53):
It's the only way I can sleep.

Speaker 1 (19:56):
Yeah, so you guys, I don't do that, Like, I don't.
I don't pretend I have a vagina. I don't tuck
it in.

Speaker 5 (20:01):
I don't playing house and be like, look at my vagina.

Speaker 4 (20:05):
It's just like comfortable for me.

Speaker 1 (20:06):
But on the long list of things that I've had
women ask me about over the years about being a man,
like do you ever do you ever like tuck it
and then pretend like I've heard that one, I've heard
one of the other ones. I've heard all you know,
every everyone, every guy's just looking at each other's dicks
in the bathroom. That's not happening.

Speaker 4 (20:23):
Happening things we can like whoo oh yeah, helicopter.

Speaker 1 (20:28):
Yeah, y'all think I'm out here helicopter in it all
the time, Like that's that's just once or twice a day.
It's not like that every time, right.

Speaker 5 (20:37):
Just don't need a little serotonin. I just go in
the bathroom. I'm like, oh yeah, I look at like yeah.

Speaker 1 (20:41):
I'm trying to think of the other things that women
seem to think that we do all the time because
we have penises. I don't know that we're always messing
with it, like not always.

Speaker 4 (20:50):
Yeah, trying to put it somewhere. I am like checking, well,
that's true. Yeah, I'm checking it throughout the day, just
to make sure everything is still there.

Speaker 2 (20:59):
In between legs when you sleep, So.

Speaker 5 (21:00):
I sleep by my side and so like I have
to like tuck close my legs and then roll over
to the side, and I'm like reached my full level
of comfort.

Speaker 2 (21:10):
Or else what would happen if you left?

Speaker 4 (21:12):
I just want to be comfortable.

Speaker 5 (21:14):
I don't think like I need it needs to be secure,
like you know. So it's like stuck in there, like
ready to go because I feel like if you just
lay your side, stuff's hanging, shifting and moving.

Speaker 1 (21:25):
Like yeah, I know, it just is what it is,
you know, I just let it chill. Yeah, I don't
know what it is. Yeah, No, I know, yeah.

Speaker 2 (21:40):
I guess, yeah, no.

Speaker 1 (21:43):
Between your legs and then like I sleep like that.

Speaker 4 (21:47):
But why, I don't know. It's just comfortable for me and.

Speaker 5 (21:50):
Like it feels like it's like like it's contained, it's secure.

Speaker 4 (21:54):
We're not moving around.

Speaker 5 (21:55):
You know, my biggest fear is that my balls are
going to somehow tangle into each other.

Speaker 4 (21:59):
Okay, that's my biggest fear in life. So I feel
like maybe that is like keeping it.

Speaker 1 (22:04):
You know, I've lived forty four years and I've never
felt as though my balls tangled up. Oh god, Oh no,
I mean that would be extremely painful and problematic. It
would be, but I'm sure you'd wake up. It would hurt, yes,
So I'm pretty sure you.

Speaker 4 (22:19):
Heard them accidentally touch Oh my god, it's the worst pain.
Wait you to touch, I will say.

Speaker 1 (22:26):
I will say this, you guys are you guys deal
with all different levels of pain and a much higher consistency.
You know, anatomy has blessed you with that as women.
But I will say, I don't know what else to
compare it to, but getting kicked in the balls is
an unbelievable amount of pain. It is a crippling pain.
It goes through your whole Now it's brief, you know,

(22:48):
we're talking a couple of minutes max. But it is
absolutely showstoppingly, wildly breathtakingly painful.

Speaker 4 (22:55):
I'm incapacitated.

Speaker 7 (22:56):
I accellently uh tap my stepdad there and I he
dropped and couldn't breathe and I was like, oh.

Speaker 2 (23:02):
Never again, Like that was such an accident.

Speaker 1 (23:04):
My bad, Like I'm not a dude. Here is out
here trying to tell you that like being a dude's
hard or whatever. Like no, I've always said this, like
you guys have it way harder, but that that particular
thing that you guys will never know is very undesirable.

Speaker 2 (23:18):
Yeah, it doesn't look fun.

Speaker 4 (23:19):
And the emotional pain of when you do it to
yourself and you're like, I'm.

Speaker 2 (23:22):
A dum Yeah you tip of yourself.

Speaker 4 (23:24):
Yes, like when you accidentally like hit yourself.

Speaker 1 (23:27):
Or it is something that with toddlers that hobby will
have to be very aware of this, Like my nieces
they don't know, but you know, they're at that level.
So they'll like reach out to grab or like not
to fall, or they'll or they'll come like run into
you or whatever and like and they just follow it.
They go right for them, They go right for the
mid section.

Speaker 2 (23:46):
Yes, they do.

Speaker 1 (23:47):
And or they'll come PLoP down on you, they'll come
jump on you or whatever, or their legs just swinging
around because like my brother in law is like, dude,
you got to wear a fucking cup around this house,
like because you have no idea how many times I've
been kicking the balls by this and I see it
all because it's like that's just how tall they are.
And they don't know, you know, So it'll be like
Bobby and she'll like reach your arm out and then

(24:07):
I'm like, no, you're gonna fall Bobby. Yeah. Yeah, they don't.
They don't know. They don't know about that. All right,
Well there's the tangent. See, we made it. We made
it funny or I don't know if it was funny
about we made it something. We went from a serious
topic of disgust to uh, apparently Jason likes pending as

(24:30):
a vagina when yeah, it would be strange to have
to not have a an appendage down there. That would
be weird, Like when I like to have a vagina
when there's just nothing like because I'm just used to
having it's kind of a pain. In the ass like
certain pants, and I can with athletics, you can get

(24:50):
a little chase, a little chase fee you know.

Speaker 4 (24:53):
Vagina, Yeah, I'd be like, what I put in there?
In there? What could I like to stick up in there?
How far does it?

Speaker 1 (25:00):
Oh?

Speaker 3 (25:01):
Yeah, one time did you say to us, You're like,
if I had a vagina, my peah, balance would be
all fucked up and it would.

Speaker 5 (25:06):
Just know, you wouldn't having everything'd be uncomfortable.

Speaker 7 (25:12):
And also as me, if I could put a pill
bottle in there and I said, no, are you sure?

Speaker 2 (25:17):
Yes, you try you see the end of it.

Speaker 1 (25:23):
Theoretically you could cap out.

Speaker 2 (25:25):
Oh, I mean I guess so.

Speaker 1 (25:27):
But like like you wouldn't Like theoretically you could.

Speaker 5 (25:30):
I feel like it would fit right because that's the
size of like a dude.

Speaker 1 (25:34):
Yeah, but like, I'm not sure why you would do
that smuggling in theory you I think you could look
at the size of a baby's head for sure. Yeah,
it's possible. I just don't know what the fuck you're
doing that for.

Speaker 4 (25:45):
If you're trying to bring drugs into a prison.

Speaker 2 (25:47):
That's not how I would smuggle them.

Speaker 7 (25:48):
I could put something up my cooter, but I'm not
using eight same size the whole way pill bottle.

Speaker 4 (25:53):
It'd be easier to put it there than your butthole. Right,
everything is tight. Your buttholes tighter.

Speaker 2 (26:00):
It is the buttholes.

Speaker 3 (26:02):
We talk about that enough.

Speaker 1 (26:08):
We don't talk about it enough, like what we need
to bring more awareness to how tight your but.

Speaker 7 (26:13):
It's also one of them is dry and one of
them is theoretically wet when you're shoving ship up there.

Speaker 4 (26:18):
So so the vagina is the way to go. If
you're trying.

Speaker 2 (26:20):
To measure one day, it's got to be tighter. It
just has to be.

Speaker 1 (26:23):
Why are we measure how would we measure it? No,
one's arguing with you.

Speaker 5 (26:28):
Let's see what can fit in one and not the other,
and we'll just increase the size one is.

Speaker 1 (26:33):
One is intended to be more malleable than the other.
One's supposed to be.

Speaker 2 (26:37):
Okay, Can I do want to be gross?

Speaker 1 (26:38):
Oh Jesus, go ahead.

Speaker 3 (26:41):
When you take a poop, right and it's like a
good poop, do.

Speaker 2 (26:44):
You usually leave them? I don't take them.

Speaker 4 (26:47):
Eyes If you did that, I don't know.

Speaker 2 (26:49):
Think about it. They're like kind of fat.

Speaker 4 (26:51):
Yeah, it could be fat? Those fat?

Speaker 2 (26:56):
So how did that come out of that.

Speaker 1 (27:00):
My mom is on this kick now that I have
to get a colonoscope.

Speaker 4 (27:03):
You do you do well?

Speaker 1 (27:04):
Forty five? Is that is the new? Uh? Is the new?
A used to be fifty?

Speaker 2 (27:09):
You have family history, don't you?

Speaker 1 (27:11):
So? Forty five?

Speaker 4 (27:12):
Mike, I'm trying to get him to go to and.

Speaker 1 (27:13):
So she's like, you're gonna have to go next year,
Like you're gonna have to go because you have we
have family history, like you're doing it, and I'm like, fuck,
And I don't want I don't want to do this.
I don't want to do this for one hundred reasons.
One I don't want to go to the hospital. And
I'm gonna do it. By the way, these are all
bullshit excuses. But I'm glad to do it, Yes, But one,
I don't want to go to the hospital. Two I don't.
I don't it seems awkward. I don't want to do

(27:34):
the prep. And then honestly, I don't want them to
fucking find anything, like I don't want to. I don't
want to find out I got something I didn't know
I have and then everything gets fucked up. Now I
understand if they do, then maybe they can fix it
and then it's fine and it's treatable, and this better
now than later, which is why I'm gonna go. But
I did think the other day. I don't I have
not googled this. I don't want to see any of
the equipment. But from what I understand, the camera they

(27:56):
stick up there is very tiny, yes, and and you
know yes, if you go number two it's much larger.
So like, I can deal with this. You can't.

Speaker 4 (28:04):
It's going different directions. Oh yeah, that that's good too.

Speaker 2 (28:09):
I'll go with you. It's the best nap I ever had.

Speaker 1 (28:11):
You don't you any evidence that you had a camera
up your ass? No? So you woke up and it
was just like you didn't feel anything. You're like, yeah,
you were like, it's not weird down there.

Speaker 7 (28:21):
No, I promise you no, you like just like sharden everywhere. Well,
you know, the prep makes things a little looser.

Speaker 1 (28:29):
And they do blow air up there.

Speaker 2 (28:31):
Oh you do let out like the longest part of
your life. Nurses are like really used to it.

Speaker 7 (28:37):
But you know, for as a human, you're like, this
is really fucking because they do put.

Speaker 2 (28:41):
Air up there. Oh you're awake for that.

Speaker 7 (28:43):
If sometimes you can be awake, and I think they
need you to fart.

Speaker 2 (28:46):
Someone correct me if I'm wrong, but they you.

Speaker 4 (28:48):
Know, there's like, no, this sounds amazing.

Speaker 1 (28:58):
I'm not fucking with you. I may find a place
like in the Maldives or something that I mean, I
may find like a place like at least I can
just I can go and get one. I can just
go to the beach afterwards. Just something I don't know. Like,
you're gonna have to You're gonna have to hide this.
It's like when you're a kid and they like your mom,
like hide your medicine and food, or like with your
dog when it won't take the pails, you wrap it
and bacon.

Speaker 4 (29:18):
Yes, you're gonna have to.

Speaker 1 (29:19):
You're gonna have to wrap this and bacon in order
for me because it's like bacon, No, really, bacon. We're
going to Balie. Oh cool, and then like we're gonna
need to take like one hour to shake camera up
your ass. But then other than that, like the rest
of the trip, you can do whatever the fuck you want.

Speaker 2 (29:33):
With those drugs.

Speaker 7 (29:33):
You'll be telling them any hole you want, baby, Wow,
that's what you'll be saying.

Speaker 4 (29:39):
Okay, I'm going ever for two weeks.

Speaker 2 (29:40):
I would want to go. I love that stuff. You
would love the prep, you sick?

Speaker 1 (29:45):
I would fucking me. We have a photo shoot tomorrow.
Maybe I should go ahead and take the prep now,
but I thank you. What kind of fucking photo shoot
is this tomorrow?

Speaker 2 (29:55):
But you know it's your right.

Speaker 1 (30:01):
I don't know, but it has way more to do
with my own phobias of the hospital and doctors and
and and and it just seems awkward to me. And
everyone tells me that of all the things, it is like,
no big deal. I mean, I've had them fucking buyobs
parts of my body while I'm awake. You know that
that's fucked up. At least on this you're asleep. But
you know me, it's like let sleeping dogs lie. Like

(30:21):
if there's something going on inside of me, it's gonna
take me tomorrow. And I don't know, then take me, Jesus,
take me, Pope, no, take me no, no. I'm just saying,
leave them here. And I know that's not responsible, and
I'm going to go and this is all for not
but I am kind of in the mindset I don't
have kids, I don't have a wife. It's like, what
if I go in there and they're like, dude, you
got stage four, bro, And I didn't even know it.

(30:44):
I didn't even know it, and I was none the wiser,
And here I am just going about my life and
then one day I'm not gonna wake up. I would
rather that than them say to me. Now, granted, the
other end of the spectrum is you're sick, we can
fix it. It'll be temporarily shitty, and then you're gonna
be you'll probably live a lot longer. Great, I'm okay.
But then there's the other side of the coin, which

(31:05):
is we can't do shit about this, or we can try,
but you're gonna feel like shit for the rest of
your life, you know what I mean. I've seen this
too many times, and yes, it's because people waited too
long most of the time. Most of the time, that's why.
But like I've also seen it where people it's like
I just it's a terrible ride. It's a terrible ride.
And then sadly, we know some people who have lost

(31:26):
the lost that battle and the the latter part of
their life was miserable. And I don't love you.

Speaker 2 (31:35):
It's your responsibility for.

Speaker 1 (31:36):
That, I agree, And that's why I'm gonna do it.

Speaker 7 (31:38):
It sucks, it's scary, but you know, you're not having
any symptoms early detection.

Speaker 1 (31:43):
No, I don't have any sympt of course I have looked.

Speaker 2 (31:46):
Of course you have like every day.

Speaker 1 (31:48):
At the symptom, not at my pupa, at the symptoms.
Lst O good. Yeah, it's a little concerning to me
that people could have these symptoms and then they don't
do anything about it. Like that's like the symptoms like
black stool blood. I'm going I'm sorry. If I got
either one of those, we are going somewhere where. Yeah,
we're going to have.

Speaker 7 (32:07):
A line because I like people that don't go to
the doctor, like I want to shake them.

Speaker 1 (32:11):
No, if I got something like that going on, We're
going to have a conversation like this. But if nothing's
going on, and nothing is going on the knock on
wood part of me doesn't really want to know.

Speaker 2 (32:20):
Listen, we'll have someone come to the studio. We'll all
go live on air. Ye all do one. I'll do
it right next to you.

Speaker 1 (32:26):
You are not looking at the inside of my asshole
on the radio, I won't look. I've done a lot
of things for ratings over the year, years. I've done
a lot of things to be a spectacle, to try
and get people listening to this fucking thing. I will
talk about it. So I'm blue in the face, but
we are. You guys don't get to look at the
inside of my asshole. After the entertainment report, before the

(32:46):
showdown in a circle seven thirty five, we're gonna do
a colon Oscar all yeah.

Speaker 2 (32:54):
Awareness.

Speaker 1 (32:55):
I think we're doing the awareness. Hey, trust me. I'm
sure it will be discussed when I have to finally
pull the trigger and go next year. And I think
everybody should do it. But I'm a hypocrite, and so
I want everyone to do all this shit I don't
want to.

Speaker 2 (33:06):
Do, and someone has to be there taping you when
you go in.

Speaker 1 (33:09):
Absolutely, I'll say you better come to BALI. Then that's
where I'm gonna be. Oh no, under a palm treating.
I tell you what it's all I'm gonna do. I'm
gonna asleep on the beach. You can do whatever the
fuck you want with me, and then just make sure
I'm right back there farting when I wake up. That's
all I care. All right, there's the tangent. If you
would set this is a preset on the iHeart app.

(33:31):
Please also the Fred Show on demand and then wherever
you listen to us and thank you for listening.