Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
It's version thirteen ninety. Family, It's Sonia Blakie. The Power
couple is back. Pastors Damone and Erica Glenn.
Speaker 3 (00:10):
Everybody, I'm good.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
It's been a busy summer for you guys.
Speaker 3 (00:15):
Yeah, keeping, say the least.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
Trying to keep the couples together, encourage y'all celebrated how
many years of marriage?
Speaker 3 (00:21):
Twenty years?
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Wow, that's incredible. And your daughter went away to college.
Speaker 3 (00:25):
Yeah, away a way, that's cool, all right, any other
daddy and he's still recovery.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
That's how it was with my daughter too, when we
sent her off to film and my husband was the
first to cry.
Speaker 4 (00:39):
I was like, what's got out? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (00:42):
But that it means you've got deep roots, good love
and a strong family.
Speaker 4 (00:45):
That's what's up. That's what's up.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
So I love this October series Falling cause it's.
Speaker 4 (00:51):
Fall y'all get it.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Falling in love and choosing to stay love is a choice,
not a coincidence.
Speaker 3 (00:59):
No, never.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
I think people romanticize falling in love because it's movies.
It's the soundtrack is all the feels and everything, and
my love is a feeling.
Speaker 4 (01:11):
Love is a decision.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
A lot of people follow the feeling, and then what
do you do with a feeling face when a feeling fades? Now,
you've got to make a decision because you're not gonna
feel it every day, No, I mean some days you
don't feel like it. And so what do you do
when I love you but I don't like it? Right?
Speaker 4 (01:32):
Yeah, I'm tired of you and I don't want to
be around you.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
I don't want to talk to you, and I still
want to have enough integrity that I keep my commitment
that I made even if I don't feel like loving
you or it doesn't feel loving right now. And I
think people too are too lad with the feeling of
love and the falling in love that they don't know
how to decide or choose love.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
M Yes, well, no, it's just that I agree. I think,
especially for women, we make love just this. You know
this movie, that this fantasy that it is in R
and B song true, but it is that, but not
(02:19):
always that. And I think that people forget that it's
a covenant. When you're in marriage, it's a covenant. It
is not something that this is not your boyfriend, this
is your husband. This is the band that's over your life.
So you cannot Yeah, that's holding everything together. And so
you know, we might have a bad day, but we
might have an excellent week, or we might have a
(02:41):
couple of weeks it's not great, but we might have
some great months. And I think that people just don't
stay in it for the long haul. They just really
look at it as something that is temporary, and it's not.
It's a covenant, and it's a covenant that you made
with your spouse. It's a covenant that you made as
unto God. And when you make a covenant to God,
then you can put it back to God. God help
(03:03):
me to do what I said that I was going
to do with my vow. And he will help you.
He will help you, but you have to go back
to him when you feel like you're in your feelings
and not in your covenant.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
Help me keep my commitment, you know, because culture version
of love, and this culture that we live in is
a cutof culture. It's a cancel culture, and that stuff
gets in the water, it gets in our blood. We
quick to, we quit to without realizing that I'm sick
of this, this ain't working for me.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
I'm out of.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Here, and we just out And I mean, she said,
you might have a bad day or a bad week.
What happened? If you have a bad five years? You
know what I'm saying, this is top do us apart.
We know couples that had a bad five years, but
the install they're celebrating their twentieth year anniversary. So they
had a bad five years and a great fifteen years
because something changed, something shifted, something elevated in the context
(03:55):
of that marriage. And so we're not saying, you know,
always suck it up and stick it out when it struggle,
when you're on a struggle bus. But we are saying,
make proper adjustments and proper changements because the changes because
of real identification for love by way of Corinthians is
love is patient, Love is kind. Love always protects and
always trusts. It hopes against hope, it perseveres.
Speaker 4 (04:16):
You know.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
So sometimes people give up to fives and they don't
have a persevering love that can go through.
Speaker 4 (04:21):
And as the song say, stand the test of time.
Speaker 2 (04:26):
Falling in love versus choosing love with covenant? Does that
require a compromise? Sometimes I think it's all all of
all of love. I can't love without compromises.
Speaker 4 (04:39):
You can't.
Speaker 1 (04:39):
You can't love without forgiveness. If you say you're going
to love somebody, you are saying that you're going to
forgive them before they make a mistake, because there is
no love without forgiveness. So already built into my covenant.
Speaker 4 (04:52):
Of love that I'm going to have to forgive you.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
I'm gonna give you grace, You're gonna give me grace.
We're gonna give each other grace. It's not gonna be
perfect we don't make some mistake, and I can't really
love you in a covenant kind of love if there
is a compromise, if there isn't consistency, if there isn't
even some conditions and some expectations. That's connected to that.
But anytime, one of my mentors is to say that
(05:15):
if I have to if I tell you I love
you and I have to tell you why, then it's
not really love because love is what love does.
Speaker 4 (05:22):
Yeah, that's good, good good.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
How do you love when it's hard?
Speaker 1 (05:26):
You know?
Speaker 2 (05:26):
I mean, I guess you got to be intentional, You've
got to make decision to do it, But it can
be hard. Like you said, like five years, somebody went
through a tough five year period in their relationship. So
how do you love during those hard times?
Speaker 3 (05:37):
I think it's I think it's as we stated before
that it is definitely a decision. It is something that
cannot be based upon how you're feeling. It's something that
is bigger and greater than you. I mean, your parents
love you. You know, they have to love you. They
birked you, they came together, your adopted parents chose to
(05:58):
love you. This part person that you're married to. They had,
they're receiving all of the stuff that you are, that
you have become, all of the hang ups, all of
the hiccups, and they choose to love you. And I
think when people realize that in a marriage that love
is a choice and not something that just happens, I
(06:19):
think that there they will embrace it a little bit
differently and to look at it a little bit differently.
I think most people think that it's a feeling, and
once you realize that it's not a feeling and that
that is a choice, that I think that builds or
you have a different muscle in your relationship.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
I Mean, nobody advocates for hard times, but how do
you love when it's hard?
Speaker 4 (06:39):
I don't know you loved me until it's hard exactly.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
Don't know that it was love because it was easy.
I know it was love because it was unconvinced. It
was it was unconventional. I know it's love because it
was difficult. I know it was love because we had
an argument. I know it was love because it was tested.
I know it was love because I lost my job.
I know it's left because we had to found bankruptcy
(07:02):
and rebuild again. I know it's loved because we went
through a difficulty, a loss, a transition. I know it's
not because something happened. A friend is born for adversity.
If there's no adversity, I don't know if you're really
my friend. If there was a friend invests, there's adversity. So,
in the love kind of relationship, of a relationship of marriage,
hard times supposed to come. What people usually do at
(07:24):
hard times, they let hard times tear them apart. Hard
times are designed to bring you together. Hard times are
designed to test your love.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
So in relationships, would you say our love for each
other should model that of God's love towards us?
Speaker 3 (07:38):
Almost definitely like love God is love. And on top
of that, as a marriage, you know for us that
our kingdom believers that every time someone sees a marriage
in the world, they're seeing how Christ feels about the
Church and how he Well, yeah, that's how it should be.
And that helps you to me, that helps you to know. Okay,
(08:00):
if this is how Christ, if this is how Christ
feels about the church, and I'm that example? Am I
being the good example of that? Like, if the love
is how Christ loves the church, I haven't always been right,
I haven't always done good. But He doesn't walk away
from me. He doesn't leave me, he doesn't forsake me.
He loves me, he takes care of me. He is
(08:22):
still in relationship with me. And so if I'm supposed
to be that example, how can God be that for me?
And I can't be that for another human being that
I'm in covenant relationship with. Like I said, this ain't
my boyfriend and it's my husband.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
And I hear you chicagoing around the world saying, but
I ain't got God.
Speaker 4 (08:37):
Okay, So God is in you, and God is.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Love, and the kind of love that you want to
experience is the God kind of love. And so if
you want that kind of love, you got to give
that type of love. And I think people give too
much love with conditions and with performances, and that doesn't
mean that love doesn't have expectations to tie to it.
But at the same time, conditional love and performative love
(09:01):
is not a God kind of love.
Speaker 4 (09:02):
Love is what love does. All right, great question, great answer?
Speaker 2 (09:06):
All right. Going to close this out with pastors Damone
and Erica Glenn, how would you like to in this
falling in love versus choosing love?
Speaker 1 (09:12):
Bottom line, I just think, like we said, it's not
an accident, it's not a coincidence. It's intentional. Make a
decision to love somebody and period. Don't let anybody outside
change how you choose or decide to love. Show it,
express it, feel it, communicated. This is how I love.
When I love you, I love you, if I ever
love you, I forever love you, or I never loved you.
Speaker 2 (09:35):
All right, that's the Erica you want to give the
closing thought.
Speaker 3 (09:38):
And just you know, we have a book called The
Thirty Day Love Challenge if you need some ideas, and
it doesn't just only speak to married couples, but it
also speaks to just people in general, because I think
as an unmarried person, you practice love on the people
that are around you, which would make it easier or
be able to transfer you to into a marriage because
(09:59):
you have built that muscle of love. And so this
Thirty Day Love Challenge book, it helps you to do that.
It gives you something to do every every day for
thirty days, and it's and it's a challenge. And it's
a challenge because in the world today, love is being challenged.
So I say it is being love is being challenged,
and so you know we are we can do it.
(10:19):
We can do it, we can.
Speaker 4 (10:20):
Love love sweet.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
Okay, okay, we do right now.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
My favorite one though, is Stevie Wonder that says.
Speaker 4 (10:32):
Love's in need of love today. Like when you.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Say love needs love, that's where we are in the world.
Love needs because people don't know what real love is.
And love is a behavior that is modeled by a belief. Yeah,
so if you believe, right, you behave. You can't behave
beyond your beliefs.
Speaker 4 (10:52):
So love is.
Speaker 2 (10:53):
Love, yeah, and the commodore is Jesus is love? Okay, awesome,
that's not the lust.
Speaker 4 (11:04):
That's a whole. That's all another show, right.
Speaker 2 (11:08):
It is our October series Falling in Love and Choosing
to Stay Love y'all tune in next week. Don't forget
there's a podcast any show that you want to hear,
You can go to our website, Inspiration thirteen ninety or
simply download the iHeartRadio app. Thank you, Pastors Jamon and
Erica Glynn a pleasure.
Speaker 4 (11:24):
I appreciate you
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
It's version thirteen ninety. Family, It's Sonia Blakie. The Power
couple is back. Pastors Damone and Erica Glenn.
Speaker 3 (00:10):
Everybody, I'm good.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
It's been a busy summer for you guys.
Speaker 3 (00:15):
Yeah, keeping, say the least.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
Trying to keep the couples together, encourage y'all celebrated how
many years of marriage?
Speaker 3 (00:21):
Twenty years?
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Wow, that's incredible. And your daughter went away to college.
Speaker 3 (00:25):
Yeah, away a way, that's cool, all right, any other
daddy and he's still recovery.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
That's how it was with my daughter too, when we
sent her off to film and my husband was the
first to cry.
Speaker 4 (00:39):
I was like, what's got out? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (00:42):
But that it means you've got deep roots, good love
and a strong family.
Speaker 4 (00:45):
That's what's up. That's what's up.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
So I love this October series Falling cause it's.
Speaker 4 (00:51):
Fall y'all get it.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Falling in love and choosing to stay love is a choice,
not a coincidence.
Speaker 3 (00:59):
No, never.
Speaker 1 (01:01):
I think people romanticize falling in love because it's movies.
It's the soundtrack is all the feels and everything, and
my love is a feeling.
Speaker 4 (01:11):
Love is a decision.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
A lot of people follow the feeling, and then what
do you do with a feeling face when a feeling fades? Now,
you've got to make a decision because you're not gonna
feel it every day, No, I mean some days you
don't feel like it. And so what do you do
when I love you but I don't like it? Right?
Speaker 4 (01:32):
Yeah, I'm tired of you and I don't want to
be around you.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
I don't want to talk to you, and I still
want to have enough integrity that I keep my commitment
that I made even if I don't feel like loving
you or it doesn't feel loving right now. And I
think people too are too lad with the feeling of
love and the falling in love that they don't know
how to decide or choose love.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
M Yes, well, no, it's just that I agree. I think,
especially for women, we make love just this. You know
this movie, that this fantasy that it is in R
and B song true, but it is that, but not
(02:19):
always that. And I think that people forget that it's
a covenant. When you're in marriage, it's a covenant. It
is not something that this is not your boyfriend, this
is your husband. This is the band that's over your life.
So you cannot Yeah, that's holding everything together. And so
you know, we might have a bad day, but we
might have an excellent week, or we might have a
(02:41):
couple of weeks it's not great, but we might have
some great months. And I think that people just don't
stay in it for the long haul. They just really
look at it as something that is temporary, and it's not.
It's a covenant, and it's a covenant that you made
with your spouse. It's a covenant that you made as
unto God. And when you make a covenant to God,
then you can put it back to God. God help
(03:03):
me to do what I said that I was going
to do with my vow. And he will help you.
He will help you, but you have to go back
to him when you feel like you're in your feelings
and not in your covenant.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
Help me keep my commitment, you know, because culture version
of love, and this culture that we live in is
a cutof culture. It's a cancel culture, and that stuff
gets in the water, it gets in our blood. We
quick to, we quit to without realizing that I'm sick
of this, this ain't working for me.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
I'm out of.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Here, and we just out And I mean, she said,
you might have a bad day or a bad week.
What happened? If you have a bad five years? You
know what I'm saying, this is top do us apart.
We know couples that had a bad five years, but
the install they're celebrating their twentieth year anniversary. So they
had a bad five years and a great fifteen years
because something changed, something shifted, something elevated in the context
(03:55):
of that marriage. And so we're not saying, you know,
always suck it up and stick it out when it struggle,
when you're on a struggle bus. But we are saying,
make proper adjustments and proper changements because the changes because
of real identification for love by way of Corinthians is
love is patient, Love is kind. Love always protects and
always trusts. It hopes against hope, it perseveres.
Speaker 4 (04:16):
You know.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
So sometimes people give up to fives and they don't
have a persevering love that can go through.
Speaker 4 (04:21):
And as the song say, stand the test of time.
Speaker 2 (04:26):
Falling in love versus choosing love with covenant? Does that
require a compromise? Sometimes I think it's all all of
all of love. I can't love without compromises.
Speaker 4 (04:39):
You can't.
Speaker 1 (04:39):
You can't love without forgiveness. If you say you're going
to love somebody, you are saying that you're going to
forgive them before they make a mistake, because there is
no love without forgiveness. So already built into my covenant.
Speaker 4 (04:52):
Of love that I'm going to have to forgive you.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
I'm gonna give you grace, You're gonna give me grace.
We're gonna give each other grace. It's not gonna be
perfect we don't make some mistake, and I can't really
love you in a covenant kind of love if there
is a compromise, if there isn't consistency, if there isn't
even some conditions and some expectations. That's connected to that.
But anytime, one of my mentors is to say that
(05:15):
if I have to if I tell you I love
you and I have to tell you why, then it's
not really love because love is what love does.
Speaker 4 (05:22):
Yeah, that's good, good good.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
How do you love when it's hard?
Speaker 1 (05:26):
You know?
Speaker 2 (05:26):
I mean, I guess you got to be intentional, You've
got to make decision to do it, But it can
be hard. Like you said, like five years, somebody went
through a tough five year period in their relationship. So
how do you love during those hard times?
Speaker 3 (05:37):
I think it's I think it's as we stated before
that it is definitely a decision. It is something that
cannot be based upon how you're feeling. It's something that
is bigger and greater than you. I mean, your parents
love you. You know, they have to love you. They
birked you, they came together, your adopted parents chose to
(05:58):
love you. This part person that you're married to. They had,
they're receiving all of the stuff that you are, that
you have become, all of the hang ups, all of
the hiccups, and they choose to love you. And I
think when people realize that in a marriage that love
is a choice and not something that just happens, I
(06:19):
think that there they will embrace it a little bit
differently and to look at it a little bit differently.
I think most people think that it's a feeling, and
once you realize that it's not a feeling and that
that is a choice, that I think that builds or
you have a different muscle in your relationship.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
I Mean, nobody advocates for hard times, but how do
you love when it's hard?
Speaker 4 (06:39):
I don't know you loved me until it's hard exactly.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
Don't know that it was love because it was easy.
I know it was love because it was unconvinced. It
was it was unconventional. I know it's love because it
was difficult. I know it was love because we had
an argument. I know it was love because it was tested.
I know it was love because I lost my job.
I know it's left because we had to found bankruptcy
(07:02):
and rebuild again. I know it's loved because we went
through a difficulty, a loss, a transition. I know it's
not because something happened. A friend is born for adversity.
If there's no adversity, I don't know if you're really
my friend. If there was a friend invests, there's adversity. So,
in the love kind of relationship, of a relationship of marriage,
hard times supposed to come. What people usually do at
(07:24):
hard times, they let hard times tear them apart. Hard
times are designed to bring you together. Hard times are
designed to test your love.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
So in relationships, would you say our love for each
other should model that of God's love towards us?
Speaker 3 (07:38):
Almost definitely like love God is love. And on top
of that, as a marriage, you know for us that
our kingdom believers that every time someone sees a marriage
in the world, they're seeing how Christ feels about the
Church and how he Well, yeah, that's how it should be.
And that helps you to me, that helps you to know. Okay,
(08:00):
if this is how Christ, if this is how Christ
feels about the church, and I'm that example? Am I
being the good example of that? Like, if the love
is how Christ loves the church, I haven't always been right,
I haven't always done good. But He doesn't walk away
from me. He doesn't leave me, he doesn't forsake me.
He loves me, he takes care of me. He is
(08:22):
still in relationship with me. And so if I'm supposed
to be that example, how can God be that for me?
And I can't be that for another human being that
I'm in covenant relationship with. Like I said, this ain't
my boyfriend and it's my husband.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
And I hear you chicagoing around the world saying, but
I ain't got God.
Speaker 4 (08:37):
Okay, So God is in you, and God is.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Love, and the kind of love that you want to
experience is the God kind of love. And so if
you want that kind of love, you got to give
that type of love. And I think people give too
much love with conditions and with performances, and that doesn't
mean that love doesn't have expectations to tie to it.
But at the same time, conditional love and performative love
(09:01):
is not a God kind of love.
Speaker 4 (09:02):
Love is what love does. All right, great question, great answer?
Speaker 2 (09:06):
All right. Going to close this out with pastors Damone
and Erica Glenn, how would you like to in this
falling in love versus choosing love?
Speaker 1 (09:12):
Bottom line, I just think, like we said, it's not
an accident, it's not a coincidence. It's intentional. Make a
decision to love somebody and period. Don't let anybody outside
change how you choose or decide to love. Show it,
express it, feel it, communicated. This is how I love.
When I love you, I love you, if I ever
love you, I forever love you, or I never loved you.
Speaker 2 (09:35):
All right, that's the Erica you want to give the
closing thought.
Speaker 3 (09:38):
And just you know, we have a book called The
Thirty Day Love Challenge if you need some ideas, and
it doesn't just only speak to married couples, but it
also speaks to just people in general, because I think
as an unmarried person, you practice love on the people
that are around you, which would make it easier or
be able to transfer you to into a marriage because
(09:59):
you have built that muscle of love. And so this
Thirty Day Love Challenge book, it helps you to do that.
It gives you something to do every every day for
thirty days, and it's and it's a challenge. And it's
a challenge because in the world today, love is being challenged.
So I say it is being love is being challenged,
and so you know we are we can do it.
(10:19):
We can do it, we can.
Speaker 4 (10:20):
Love love sweet.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
Okay, okay, we do right now.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
My favorite one though, is Stevie Wonder that says.
Speaker 4 (10:32):
Love's in need of love today. Like when you.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Say love needs love, that's where we are in the world.
Love needs because people don't know what real love is.
And love is a behavior that is modeled by a belief. Yeah,
so if you believe, right, you behave. You can't behave
beyond your beliefs.
Speaker 4 (10:52):
So love is.
Speaker 2 (10:53):
Love, yeah, and the commodore is Jesus is love? Okay, awesome,
that's not the lust.
Speaker 4 (11:04):
That's a whole. That's all another show, right.
Speaker 2 (11:08):
It is our October series Falling in Love and Choosing
to Stay Love y'all tune in next week. Don't forget
there's a podcast any show that you want to hear,
You can go to our website, Inspiration thirteen ninety or
simply download the iHeartRadio app. Thank you, Pastors Jamon and
Erica Glynn a pleasure.
Speaker 4 (11:24):
I appreciate you
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