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May 4, 2025 • 13 mins
We spoke with Executive Director Donna Cavalier about a fundraiser for the American Cancer Society.
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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Good morning, Thank you for listening to Community Access. I
have two guests in studio today from the Miss Beauty
of Courage inaugural pageant for cancer patients and survivors, Donna
Cavalier and Kimberly Co Francesco.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
Good morning, ladies.

Speaker 3 (00:15):
Good morning, Good morning, Ally.

Speaker 1 (00:17):
Thank you so much for being here. So we're going
to talk about this amazing pageant. But tell me how
did it come about? Why did you create it?

Speaker 4 (00:26):
Well, I'm a cancer survivor. It's been about seven years
for me now, and a few years back, I was
reflecting a little bit on how I went through my
cancer journey and had you really thought about the intentional
optimism and positivity that I tried to maintain throughout the time.

(00:46):
And I got this idea one day that I wanted
to raise awareness about a message. Wasn't sure exactly what
that message was, but I googled how to raise awareness
about a message and pageantry came up, which I had
never done anything with pageantry before. I never even went
to prom in high school. But for whatever reason, there's
a there's a concept or a theory called post traumatic

(01:08):
growth theory. After you experienced some sort of traumatic experience,
and I think that's what happened to me, and I said, sure,
why not, I'm going to be in my first pageant
at almost fifty years old.

Speaker 3 (01:19):
So I was in Missus Connecticut and won that.

Speaker 4 (01:22):
And my sister Donna and I have had Beauty of
Courage as a way to give back to the cancer
community for makeup and beauty related products, and so we
both started really being interested in the pageant world and
really appreciated all of the lovely ladies that we've met
and just you know, celebrating with one another. So when

(01:46):
the Cancer Society was looking for some opportunities for fundraising
events in the area, we merged the two passions together,
so Beauty of Courage and the pageant system, and that's
how the Beauty Courage pageant came to be.

Speaker 3 (02:01):
Donna, would you add anything else?

Speaker 5 (02:03):
No, pretty much, just exactly what you said. We're really excited.
It's the first time doing this and we've got some
great contestants and we're just looking forward to letting them
have their data shine.

Speaker 2 (02:14):
What is Beauty of Courage?

Speaker 4 (02:16):
So, Beauty of Courage is a self funded charity that
Donna and I started quite a few years back now,
and it just provides beauty related resources to cancer patients
and survivors.

Speaker 3 (02:28):
So could be makeup, could be just retail therapy.

Speaker 4 (02:32):
You know, sometimes we just give gift cards to go
to the mall and just relax, right because I know,
as a woman, I.

Speaker 3 (02:38):
Loved shopping throughout all of my treatment.

Speaker 4 (02:40):
When I was having good days, I wanted to go
to the mall and just you know, kind of get
my mind off of everything else. And so we did
that to give back to the cancer community. And so
this pageant is the next sort of realization of that,
where we can bring even more people together and just
spoil them for the day. You know, these ladies, they're
going to have their hair and their makeup done, and

(03:03):
you know, just kind of everybody treating them like the
Queen's for the day, and it's something to get their
mind off of all of the other things that are
going on in their life.

Speaker 1 (03:12):
What's so interesting is that you could have pulled up
anything on Google, but they brought you to pageant.

Speaker 5 (03:19):
This is so very true, and I just wanted to
add Also, unlike traditional pageants, this pageant is all self
funded by my sister and I, so the contestants don't
have to pay anything to be in the pageant, and
we've gotten you know, so many volunteers to come forth
and donate prizes.

Speaker 3 (03:38):
And stuff like that, so it's.

Speaker 5 (03:40):
Completely free for them, including we've collected and purchased dresses
for like the past year in preparation so that we
could offer loner dresses to the contestants. So the whole
point was for it to be as easy and seamless
as possible and for them to not have to spend
any money traditional pageants.

Speaker 3 (03:58):
I did one myself.

Speaker 5 (03:59):
It was something like eight hundred dollars to enter, So
I think taking that pressure off of them with like
you know, some of them, especially still in treatment, maybe
they don't have the funds for it. So it is
a completely free pageant for the contestants. And then of
course the tickets are donation based and those donations go
to the American Cancer Society. Really for life and Waterbury Beautiful.

Speaker 1 (04:22):
I want to go back to missus Connecticut for a moment.
Why did you decide you'd like to do something like that?
Had you ever done other pageants?

Speaker 5 (04:29):
No?

Speaker 3 (04:30):
Never, never, And I.

Speaker 4 (04:32):
Was forty nine when I competed in Missus Connecticut and won,
so I'm technically Missus Connecticut twenty twenty two and went
to Vegas, walked on the same stage that Elvis performed
on for six hundred plus shows when he was in residency,
and let me just tell you, it was you know,
you're up against the top of the top, the fifty

(04:54):
women from across the United States.

Speaker 3 (04:57):
So Vegas was terrified.

Speaker 4 (05:00):
Exhausting, and exhilarating all in one ten day period of time,
because it was amazing and such an incredible experience and
the relationships that you create with the women will will
last forever. My roommate was missus New Hampshire. I adore her,
you know, Missus Rhode Island, Missus Connecticut.

Speaker 3 (05:19):
All of the ladies that are from this area.

Speaker 4 (05:22):
You just bond with one another and it was such
an incredible time. First time ever I was, you know,
in Vegas or in Missus America. You have to wear
five inch heels, so that was fun learning how to
walk in five inch heels across the stage the size.

Speaker 3 (05:38):
Of a football field.

Speaker 2 (05:39):
I love it.

Speaker 4 (05:40):
I joke sometimes with people, I say walking across the
stage and five inch heels was probably more traumatic than
going through my cancer treatment. Really, yes, which is why
this pageant is going to be.

Speaker 3 (05:53):
And we keep saying that, like as low stress as possible.

Speaker 4 (05:57):
No bathing suits, no talent. You know, we're just trying
to make it as easy as possible for the ladies
to just enjoy the day and not have to worry about,
you know, stressing about anything.

Speaker 1 (06:09):
About fifteen years ago, I had gotten very, very sick.
The doctor said to me, it's either the good cancer
or the bad cancer. And I'm fine, thank god. And
I went through everything. And about a year after, I
went to Africa and I did missions work. Yes, so
you did a pageant? What was it inside of you
that was like?

Speaker 2 (06:30):
For me?

Speaker 1 (06:31):
I never wanted to be afraid again. Yes, I said,
I will not allow this to control me or ruin me.
And so I went and I did something that was
very scary for me.

Speaker 2 (06:41):
Was it the same for you?

Speaker 3 (06:42):
Exactly? Yeah, that's exactly right.

Speaker 4 (06:44):
And I actually just learned about post traumatic growth theory
about two months ago. I didn't know that was a thing,
and I couldn't figure it out because I literally would
say to myself every year, I'm going to do something
that scares me.

Speaker 3 (06:56):
So last year I learned.

Speaker 4 (06:58):
I took sailing lessons, which wasn't that scary, but it
was scary enough for me because park in the boat
was scary.

Speaker 3 (07:04):
Parking the boat was scary for sure. For sure.

Speaker 4 (07:07):
The year before that, I did a TED Talk Ted
X Talk, which was very scary.

Speaker 3 (07:12):
What did I do?

Speaker 5 (07:13):
Oh?

Speaker 3 (07:13):
And then the year before that was the pageant.

Speaker 4 (07:15):
So it's it's true, you do you and some people
do and some people don't. But for the people that
do experience that post traumatic growth, you're just looking for
those opportunities to not be afraid anymore. All of a
sudden you're like, hey, exactly, I'm not afraid of this anymore.

Speaker 3 (07:30):
I'm gonna do anything right.

Speaker 5 (07:32):
Actually trickles to the supporters too. Yeah, watching her and
seeing her and just a traumatic event of going through that.
As a supporter, I kind of wanted the new lease
on life with her. I'm like, well, you know what
I mean, she can go through this, then I could
go through anything as well. So I kind of jumped
on board with all the all the stuff that she
wanted to do. The TED Talk, I was right there

(07:54):
in the stands. I wasn't on the sailboat with her,
but she did get me on a plane because I
was not going to let my sister go to Las
Vegas and compete for Missus America and not be there.
So first time on a plane at fifty two years
old or sometimes she flew and I loved it, by
the way, and.

Speaker 4 (08:12):
And I did get her to compete in missus Connecticut
last year. So Donna got her first taste of pageantry
last year. And as terrifying as it is walking across
the stage and heels, she loved it and she had
a great time.

Speaker 2 (08:23):
You're a good sister.

Speaker 1 (08:24):
Oh okay, she's a mer I just want to throw
this out there for people who have gone through post
traumatic anything. There is something called EMDR. I don't know
if you're familiar with trauma therapy, and it just teaches
you how to shut down those triggers or those intrusive
thoughts as they come in. So if you're that person,
a divorce, something traumatic at all from your childhood, whether

(08:45):
a sickness, just want to put that out there for you.
If you want to ask a health provider about AMDR,
let's talk about the pageant.

Speaker 2 (08:52):
I'm going to be the EMC. This is right up
my alley. No pun intended. I was Misswatertown.

Speaker 1 (08:58):
Many years ago, I was in the Miss America Scholarship pageant,
so I am a firm believer in it. I often
have to put out that disclaimer it's not honey boo boo.

Speaker 2 (09:09):
I'm like, no, it's not honey boo boo. So take
me through the day.

Speaker 1 (09:12):
How will it go for people who would like to
attend or who would like to be a contestant.

Speaker 4 (09:17):
Yeah, absolutely so, Donnie, you want to walk a stoveray.
So the contestants will r pretty early that Sunday morning
because we'll have our hair and makeup people there, so
we have volunteers in the community. We're actually still looking
for a couple additional hair and makeup people, so if
we have any volunteers that can join us on May eighteenth,
that would be fabulous. But the ladies will arrive and

(09:39):
start getting all dolled up and ready. The judges interviews
will start around eleven o'clock that morning, which is behind
closed doors, so they'll be They'll have three judging categories
for the day. It's the private interview with the judges
and then evening down of course when the pageant starts,
and then the last segment, which is I'm to what

(10:00):
you're probably familiar with with the on stage question. Instead
of on stage question, we're doing something a little bit
different and it's words of wisdom. So each lady will
share about twenty to thirty seconds of her words of wisdoms.
You know what, for example, what would you give what
advice would you give to.

Speaker 3 (10:15):
A newly diagnosed cancer patient?

Speaker 4 (10:16):
Right, And the idea there is to be able to share, right,
We're sharing our stories, we're sharing our experiences and really
helping to inspire and you know, new cancer survivors and
really helping to make an impact. And so there's those
three categories. They'll be you know, basically treated to just
being a queen for the day. And then two lucky ladies.

(10:39):
Because we have two age categories. The response has been
so great we wanted to give that opportunity to more
than one. So there'll be a mis Beauty of Courage
Elite and a mis Beauty of Courage Classic. Both of
them will win a beautiful Sworsky crystal crown sash and
some prizes, and then they'll be you know, representing Misbautio

(11:03):
Courage throughout the next year and come back next year
to give that Crown to the next the next.

Speaker 1 (11:09):
Lady, you said that you have people who've donated dresses
and hair and yacup, so you're just gonna love on
these people.

Speaker 5 (11:17):
It's gift cards. We've gotten really an outpouring of support
from the community for for all the things that we needed,
Like Kimberly said, the hair and makeup, people, like I said,
gift cards, dresses. You coming to do that and see
like incredible.

Speaker 2 (11:36):
And we are so grateful to thank you. I'm so great.
It's my pleasure, honestly.

Speaker 4 (11:41):
Yeah. As a matter of fact, speA can addresses Lorie
from Dazzle's Boutique in Watertown. I stopped in there the
other day because I wanted to pick up some additional dresses.
I think you've I mentioned don and I have been
collecting them over the last year or so. If we
see them on sale or whatever, we buy them. And
so I was telling Laurie, the owner about it the
other day, and she gave me a ton of dresses

(12:02):
at an incredible discount, and I literally started crying. I
just said, you have no idea how much these ladies
are going to appreciate these dresses. And it's just things
like that like the community coming out. You know, Donn
and I we're you know, obviously we're putting on the event,
but the more help we can get from the community
is just making it all that more special for these
beautiful ladies.

Speaker 1 (12:22):
If you're interested in being a contestant, you can go
to Beautyofcourage dot org. You can also donate, volunteer, you
can do hair and makeup, bring dresses, make a donation,
anything you can think of. It's Sunday, May eighteenth, at
one o'clock at the Heritage Hotel and Spot in Southbury.
Again go to Beautyofcourage dot org. I want to thank

(12:43):
Donna Cavalier and Kimberly Coofrancesco for putting on this pageant,
paying it forward, and just just being amazing people. Thank
you so much for sharing your story.

Speaker 3 (12:53):
Thank you, Thank you so much for having us.

Speaker 5 (12:55):
Thank you so very much.

Speaker 2 (12:57):
We truly appreciate you. Thank you,
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