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February 10, 2025 47 mins

In this very special episode, Karen and Chris celebrate Chris's birthday with a chat about skeleton motorcyclists, sneaking into pools and more!

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Are you leaving?

Speaker 2 (00:03):
I you wanna way back home? Either way, we want
to be there.

Speaker 3 (00:10):
Doesn't matter how much baggage you claim, and give us
time and a terminol.

Speaker 2 (00:17):
And gaggie ad.

Speaker 1 (00:19):
We want to send you off InStyle.

Speaker 2 (00:23):
We wanna welcome you back home.

Speaker 1 (00:27):
Tell us all about it. We scared her? Was it fine? Malborn?

(00:48):
Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Do you need to ride? Do your need to ride?

Speaker 2 (01:01):
To ride with Karen and Chris? Welcome to Do you
need to ride? This is Chris.

Speaker 1 (01:17):
Fairbanks and this is Karen Colgarreth.

Speaker 2 (01:19):
We are leaving for my house, which is rare, I know,
but it's so exciting. Please take a left.

Speaker 1 (01:26):
Okay. Another reason today is exciting is because it's Chris's birthday.

Speaker 2 (01:33):
That's right, I am fifty years old.

Speaker 1 (01:37):
Is this the Big five? Oh?

Speaker 2 (01:39):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (01:39):
Holy shit? How do you feel?

Speaker 2 (01:41):
I mean? I went to bed feeling like, oh my god,
I can't believe I'm at a halfway point, and then
I woke up like, who am I fooling? I'm not
going to live to be a hundred. Maybe that'd be
great if I did. I'm not saying I won't. My
great grandma did. But it's more of a three fourths.
Oh god, is it two thirds?

Speaker 1 (02:00):
Could be a two thirds or could be a seven
tenths or.

Speaker 2 (02:03):
Yeah, if you're a oh no, that would have to
be an accident.

Speaker 1 (02:07):
Maybe these guys are no, they this is gorgeous.

Speaker 2 (02:14):
Yes, I this is Look at this, Look at this
rounded glass on this is that a turn? Yeah?

Speaker 1 (02:22):
That's so pretty.

Speaker 2 (02:23):
That is the kind of As a kid, an anxious kid,
I had nightmares about a baseball knowing into that kind
of class, in that kind of glass, or that.

Speaker 1 (02:32):
Was sent there by you, or just in general.

Speaker 2 (02:34):
Just in general, I just felt for homeowners, even as
a child.

Speaker 1 (02:38):
Of course you did. You've always been an EmPATH.

Speaker 2 (02:41):
Uh and we shall turn right, okay.

Speaker 3 (02:45):
But all these yes, all these people have to do
their things, all dough mine.

Speaker 2 (02:50):
The uncontrolled intersections around here. This is the I think
we've driven through in the past. We have for sure, Okay, okay,
So everyone knows this is the most Victorian homes in
all of Los Angeles, and I live near it, although
I am not in it, but it is. I get
so excited about them that this is where I drive

(03:12):
around and do my cameos.

Speaker 3 (03:16):
It's just so pretty. It's like there's actually architecture interesting.
I mean that it's interesting, like what was that?

Speaker 2 (03:23):
Even that rundown kind of a lot of them look
like haunted houses, especially the Thriller house. But there is
one street that is one more one more block and
the Milturn Left. But I want to get everyone's feedback
about this house that seemingly has a CBGB's awning, which

(03:45):
I've seen the guy out there working on his motorcycle.
Left turn here, Carroll Avenue is apparently the street. This
is the this is a horse historic street with the
most Victorian homes. That is the Thriller House there?

Speaker 1 (04:00):
Oh cool? So has it always looked like that?

Speaker 2 (04:03):
I burnt. I don't know. And it's funny, very fittingly.
The person that lives in there just peeks out the
window and there's one flickering light. She's really in character.

Speaker 1 (04:12):
Wow. But oh look at the yes.

Speaker 2 (04:16):
Look at that rounded like, I don't even know what
that is.

Speaker 1 (04:21):
I don't either, have never seen that. And there's a
lot of Victorian.

Speaker 3 (04:23):
Homes in my hometown, so like I kind of thought
I've seen it all before.

Speaker 2 (04:27):
And this is this one house. The more gothic. Of
these had a Black Lives Matter a poster and the
other one had a Trump thing. But I saw them always.

Speaker 1 (04:37):
Almost like across the street from each other.

Speaker 2 (04:39):
Yeah, but I see it. I've driven through here enough
to see that they are indeed friends and they put
their politics aside. Nice to take a rite, okay, and yes, yes.

Speaker 1 (04:52):
Wow, you know it's funny. I'm the one.

Speaker 3 (04:54):
I was having all those reactions like I hadn't been
there before, even though I'm like, yes, we've done this,
like at least twice.

Speaker 1 (04:59):
But I feel like I.

Speaker 3 (05:00):
Always looked up instead of down, so like I was
always looking at the same side of the street, and
the other side of the street had those crazy like
that was like a porch with a built wooden instead
of like the usual lattice. It was circular porthole, a
gigantic port hole.

Speaker 2 (05:20):
Yeah. Yeah, like you're walking into a submarine shaped porch.

Speaker 1 (05:26):
Or a Lord of the Rings style port.

Speaker 2 (05:29):
Or some sort of a horizontal well.

Speaker 3 (05:33):
It's the ring well turned sideways and the girl with
the wet hair comes out forward from.

Speaker 2 (05:38):
It, right right. It's horrifying and gothic but so ornate,
and you really got to appreciate the woodwork. And then
you're just in a neighborhood like this. These are the
homes that like remind me of any university district in
like a Midwest town.

Speaker 1 (05:57):
These lemon trees in the front yards very inniscent of
old Los Angeles when it was all citrus groves.

Speaker 2 (06:04):
Yeah, there are a lot of lemon trees.

Speaker 1 (06:07):
Oh there's one for sale. Just the tree, please, we'll
take four lemons. That's seven thousand dollars. Put a skeleton
on a.

Speaker 2 (06:17):
Bike, take it right here. Oh that's fun. That's what
you do when that's the bike equivalent of right, okay,
putting like a planting flowers in the hood of your camaro.
Yeah on blocks. Yeah, this is it's just a cool neighborhood.

(06:37):
The fact that we're near downtown it's not lost on me.
Although i'm lost right now. I'm so sorry, but I
know that I had a mission.

Speaker 1 (06:50):
Well we'll just drive around, yeah, just go up and down.
It is.

Speaker 2 (06:54):
It is a fun care free I mean you can
take a rider. Not here, of course, because there's a house,
but anywhere you go, we're gonna.

Speaker 1 (07:03):
Want to take it. Right.

Speaker 3 (07:04):
Oh thinks okay, right, could someone please move these recycling bins.

Speaker 2 (07:09):
I mean, that's how you know you're in a neighborhood
that really they're all in agreeance with some sort of ordinance.
They have meetings, and that's one of these meetings. They're like,
I think they should be twelve feet because the garbage
guy told me that. Okay, all adjourned gavel. It seems
like that kind of neighborhood.

Speaker 3 (07:30):
But I mean like saying we need to put them
this far into the street, right.

Speaker 2 (07:34):
Some people came, yeah, it's like, okay, where this is
our third session about six to twelve feet, which is
going to be where you don't get that kind of
neighborhood action action and other parts of Los Angeles. Okay,
this is I think the right street, and up on
the left there's a CBGB's that rock club even though

(08:00):
stands for country, blues and blue grass a lot of bands. Okay,
what do you think is that authentic or did the guy.

Speaker 3 (08:09):
Just ooh, it kind of does look authentic. I mean,
I wouldn't know. It's not like I saw it in
real life.

Speaker 2 (08:17):
In New York.

Speaker 3 (08:18):
But that's fucking I mean, it is the mfug thing.
I wonder if that's the correct I wonder if they
did that, because that's three fifteen and CBGB's was three
fifteen on whatever street.

Speaker 2 (08:30):
They were all, oh, maybe or maybe the guy that
lives there was a door guy only.

Speaker 1 (08:36):
So you look up what the real one looks like.

Speaker 2 (08:39):
That's what I think that's gonna it's immediately gonna be Oh,
they were all bright red because that one's sort of
a alien skin tone.

Speaker 1 (08:51):
It was gray, very gray green. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (08:55):
And of course this house on the right, I never
know where I am anyway, there's a house from one
tree Hill somewhere in here.

Speaker 3 (09:06):
Wait, I have breaking news though, because yes, do you
want to hear about Blossom's adventure.

Speaker 1 (09:11):
Like a squirrel? Yeah, literally, just sitting in the street
eating a nut, like a like a cartoon in the world.

Speaker 2 (09:18):
Hye bye, casual squirrel with great postures.

Speaker 1 (09:20):
You know why, because that casual squirrel feels protected by
these garbage cans that the way out in the fucking street.

Speaker 2 (09:26):
You know what. The meting squirrels were brought up.

Speaker 1 (09:28):
They were like, we must protect these nut eating squirrels.

Speaker 2 (09:31):
And they have names. Okay, that dilapidated, sure, shingle. It
looks haunted, but look at it's stacked up. It reminds
me of Astoria, Oregon. It's a goony's house right there.

Speaker 1 (09:43):
Yeah, totally.

Speaker 3 (09:47):
So the other morning, Blossom's like, I have to get
out into the yard at five point fifteen, and I
was like, are you serious?

Speaker 1 (09:54):
This is irritating, which is real insistent. So I got
up and let her out through the siding glass or
my bedroom, and then ten minutes go by. I'm just
laying there, Me and Frank get up and then we
hear Blossom yelp out in the yard and she comes
running in right and so I'm like, what did you
do whatever? And she looks super scared. I look out

(10:15):
the window. Two full sized coyotes. Oh shit, are walking away.
So they're on the near They're on the house side
of the path of the pool, not the other side,
and they are walking away.

Speaker 3 (10:27):
And then like ten minutes later, I'm out feeding them whatever,
doing our morning routine, and I look down. Her leg
is bleeding. They nipped her no way, yes, and I
had to.

Speaker 1 (10:38):
Take her to the vet, the emergency VT. And she
got bitten.

Speaker 3 (10:42):
She got like nipped and almost taken by a coyote.

Speaker 1 (10:45):
She got away and now she has a little her
little treated puncture wound and she has to work cone.

Speaker 2 (10:52):
Oh no, but I'm so glad.

Speaker 1 (10:55):
That's Oh my god.

Speaker 2 (10:56):
I thought I would think your yard would be the
safest because it's not, like, doesn't it drop off after
the pool?

Speaker 1 (11:04):
There's like yes, but they I think they live at
the bottom of the of like there's like a lot
of wild because it's just empty fields in all of
the neighbor's backyards. So I think there's a lot of
wildlife back there.

Speaker 2 (11:19):
And yell a motor cycle look at him, go uh yeah,
that is my worst fear. And I'm not even a
dog owner.

Speaker 1 (11:29):
It was pretty crazy. But she she has made it
through the rain. But you know, as opposed to just
having you name random one tree hill houses, I thought
i'd bring a little bring a little breaking news to
the poet.

Speaker 2 (11:42):
Well, back to the subject at hand. The UPN Network
shot a lot of.

Speaker 1 (11:47):
The subject of men. Is this really how you want
to spend your birthday? Chris? It doesn't make sense.

Speaker 2 (11:52):
Old homes are my birds. I watch them, I drive
by slow, I peek in them. OEPs. No, it was
just something nearby.

Speaker 1 (12:04):
No, No, it's good.

Speaker 2 (12:06):
But what are you going to do? I mean lifestyle
change wise, How are you going to battle these coyotes
because they are conniving. They will taunt a dog and
have their friends waiting around the corner, like coyotes are masterful.

Speaker 1 (12:21):
Yes, that's why she thought. I'm sure she thought they
were friends and so that they could go and play together.
Happy Birthdays.

Speaker 2 (12:28):
Oh my gosh, are you kidding me?

Speaker 1 (12:30):
I'm handing Chris a big birthday present.

Speaker 2 (12:32):
This makes me so happy. I didn't even know that
you knew. I was all excited to surprise you.

Speaker 1 (12:38):
I knew and you do. Do you know why? Because
of our masterful producer on the least, who texted me
and was like, I feel like this is something you
would want to know if you don't know already. And
I was like, oh, of course I already knew.

Speaker 2 (12:50):
I know. I didn't know because I never have even
when I should. Family members. My sister makes a calendar
with photos of the days with like remember your niece's birthday,
and I get that's why I get these hard copy calendars.
The only way people were getting it right for a
while is when we were all on Facebook.

Speaker 3 (13:10):
Yeah that's right, and you could just see other people
doing it and you're like.

Speaker 2 (13:13):
Hey, whoa, this is big, big, beautiful.

Speaker 1 (13:19):
Or a frame I gave Chris and or a frame
which we have done commercials for ourselves.

Speaker 2 (13:24):
Right, this is the equivalent, and I'm going to read
the card out loud all their stickers thank you. Oh
that that's so me. A dog with a with his
hat bill flipped out his punk rock dog and oh yeah,
that's a that's a very salivating dog. And then wait,

(13:47):
where have I seen this butt man before?

Speaker 3 (13:49):
It's Eric who drew the bananas logo. He's a skateboard
guy and he's like an illustrator comic book guy.

Speaker 2 (13:57):
Okay, that's why it looks familiar, because I'm a skateboard.

Speaker 1 (14:01):
Guy exactly, and he's super cool.

Speaker 2 (14:05):
Happy birthday, my friend loved KK. Thank you KK.

Speaker 1 (14:10):
You're welcome.

Speaker 2 (14:12):
People know that that's when we call each other when
we're out of the.

Speaker 3 (14:17):
Studio and we just don't have time to share full
names to each other.

Speaker 2 (14:22):
What are the dimensions of this frame? I am this
is the biggest picture frame ever. It's like an art
gallery size.

Speaker 1 (14:30):
It is now. Also, please fully feel free to keep
it and regift it to your sister or somebody if
you feel like somebody else will love it more.

Speaker 2 (14:41):
But my sister has or frames she purchased through our
you know code discount code. But this one, this sign,
I mean, this is nice. And I had some too
that I gave away his gifts and leaving none no
frames for thine self.

Speaker 1 (15:03):
Right you always give them away? Yes, but I do
have a little.

Speaker 3 (15:06):
They were very generous and I'm sorry because this really
does sound like a commercial and it's not. But they
just gave us so many because we did ads for
so long that I'm like, hey, who wants one?

Speaker 1 (15:17):
Everyone loves them?

Speaker 2 (15:19):
Well I need some? Should we mention oneskin because I
need a refill? I'm just kidding. We have great sponsors.
It's our point.

Speaker 1 (15:31):
Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.

Speaker 2 (15:32):
Thanks and you paid unslated ad plug. I'm very excited
about this. Yeah, great, Yeah I am.

Speaker 1 (15:39):
I think that's a really mature gift to get for
your fiftieth birthday, a digital frame where you can focus
on family.

Speaker 2 (15:47):
I wonder is I probably shouldn't because of the size
of this. I should get some nice high reds photos,
ketsups be you know, all connected to my Instagram and
then pixel city you know what I mean, don't get
me a start.

Speaker 1 (16:04):
Take a look. I don't know if that's how it is.

Speaker 2 (16:06):
Yeah, I don't know either.

Speaker 3 (16:08):
I mean on my dad's which is regular size, smaller
than that one. All of the pictures are digital and
they look great. Oh they're like phone pictures.

Speaker 2 (16:16):
Right, I'm excited, yay for my birthday. I have where
there's going to be a photo booth or what is
it with a red carpet and a point and shoot
or a oh step and repeat, a step and repeat. Sorry,
been a while since I modeled.

Speaker 1 (16:32):
Sorry, really quick, K and K donut? Did you know
that was there?

Speaker 2 (16:36):
I never put it together. And it's funny because I
call you KK all the time.

Speaker 1 (16:41):
It's all happening. Okay. Sorry, you're saying you have never modeled,
and yet.

Speaker 2 (16:46):
Well I did. I was a foot model for a while,
but I have not ever seen a photo. You know,
when you're at an event, like I'd get invited to
Comedy Central stuff once, you know, a decade ago, and
then you'd go look up the photos and it says
Getty Images. So I on plexiglass in the foreground of

(17:09):
this photo backdrop, I'm printing out a Getty Images thing
on plexiglass. So it's in front of everyone, which gives
each photo a hilarious legitimacy and a wink to showbiz.
Do you think.

Speaker 1 (17:25):
Absolutely the Getty people may sue you. Just keep it
in mind, just be ready in case they do.

Speaker 2 (17:32):
I it did cross my mind. But it is also yeah,
it is their logo and they'll switch up the phone.

Speaker 3 (17:41):
Well it's the whole it's not just the logo, but
it's the whole way they watermark their own pictures, right,
so you're kind of like it's mine too, which I
think they don't like.

Speaker 2 (17:51):
Yeah, who I mean, that would be if the best
case scenario, if it looking I think I wanted to
be crooked and because I'm just gonna put a on
campaign sign wires and it'll be like crooked and I'm
going to make the letters slightly askew. We'll see. But
you're now that but you're just saying legal standpoint.

Speaker 1 (18:13):
But you're just saying purely for your birthday as this
funny thing, right, Okay, But it.

Speaker 2 (18:18):
Is a photo booth where from an iPad people can
email the photos to themselves. Oftentimes you can pay for
that service, but there are apps where you know there's
just a ring light and a red carpet. People can
take photos and send them to themselves, so it's not
like they're going online.

Speaker 1 (18:39):
Then I think. Then I think, as a.

Speaker 2 (18:42):
Now I'm worried about getting sued by the Getty people.

Speaker 1 (18:45):
I didn't understand. I thought you were talking about something else,
because you were you started that talking about Comedy Central
and all these things, so the right kind of confused.

Speaker 2 (18:53):
But here's my thing, Christopher Nolan talk.

Speaker 1 (18:57):
It's what's the value of that? Because like, it's a
fun joke to you.

Speaker 3 (19:00):
But then I bet you all those people who absolutely
want to post those pictures, is that a positive for them?

Speaker 1 (19:09):
That Getty is on there? It looks like it's something.

Speaker 2 (19:12):
Yeah, because the background I made it says fifty years
at Fairbanks, and there's Ivy Leave like film Fest Laurels,
so it really looks like we're at some sort of
a event. The backdrop is a perfect white, you know,
spandex sheet that covers this frame, and it looks like
we're at an event. And I just thought, what everyone

(19:35):
loves getting photos taken in front of those things photo ops,
why not provide one in a hilarious way wonderful?

Speaker 1 (19:44):
Sorry, I think I wasn't listening.

Speaker 2 (19:45):
No, no, And I do have trouble getting from point
A to.

Speaker 3 (19:49):
Point B, and I have trouble following in any way,
shape or form when people are speaking.

Speaker 1 (19:55):
I guess, no, it's me.

Speaker 2 (19:57):
Howard Kramer, I believe, has called me a huge I'm
in screensaver because yeah, I don't quite know where it's
but I do know why he's saying it.

Speaker 3 (20:09):
Yes, it's a it's not super specific, but it is
just kind of a funny.

Speaker 1 (20:13):
You have an ability to when you're.

Speaker 3 (20:16):
Speaking, Uh, you kind of sound like toasters bouncing right.

Speaker 2 (20:21):
There's a lot of buffering that goes on.

Speaker 1 (20:23):
There's a big green, beautiful hill with a beautiful blue
sky behind it. Is that you?

Speaker 2 (20:30):
Oh, yes, exactly. I thought you meant.

Speaker 1 (20:33):
Yes.

Speaker 2 (20:33):
There's a kaleidoscopy wheel that's always churning as I think,
but the sky. I love that. It's raining. We need it,
we want it. Bring it on for your birthday?

Speaker 1 (20:46):
Do you want a milkshake from McDonald's.

Speaker 2 (20:50):
Oh sure, Oh you mean right now? It is my
birthday now?

Speaker 1 (20:57):
Yeah, it's your birthday now. And there's a McDonald's right there.

Speaker 2 (20:59):
Yes, thank you, that's really very nice. I didn't know
you already got me a big, nice frame I would love.

Speaker 1 (21:09):
Okay, let's see if I don't kill us both by
making this left turn.

Speaker 3 (21:14):
And I did it, oops, but very close, but I didn't.
Bob Newhart is eternal.

Speaker 2 (21:23):
Yes, I I should listen to my button down mind
of Bob Newhart if you haven't, if you're maybe not
even familiar with him or only know him from one
of his TV shows, Right, Bob Newhart's stand up is
very ahead of its time and great. Yeah, not ahead

(21:44):
of its time compared to today. I don't think anyone's doing
one end of a phone call on stage, but if
you saw it today, you'd be like, oh, someone's doing that.
At the time, people were losing their minds and arena's
were filled.

Speaker 1 (22:00):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (22:01):
Like, if you think about someone like Bob Newhart touring
and selling out to like middle aged folks, I think
is who went to see comedy back then? Now you
know it's just a bunch of spray painting kids with mohawks.

Speaker 1 (22:16):
Well also though, back then young people look like middle
aged people, so it's kind of kind of hard to tell.

Speaker 2 (22:22):
Right, That's what I'm noticing when I because you know,
turning fifty it's crazy not to just look at an
old photo of like here's the us UCLA football team,
Like when you're in a sports bar, it's like nineteen
forty five, and everyone looks like the Three Stooges. So
they're just like a bunch of mow and cheps balding.

(22:47):
So a couple of the kids have cigarettes in their mouth.

Speaker 1 (22:49):
Thank you, Oh my.

Speaker 2 (22:53):
Okay, and I believe that's yours.

Speaker 1 (22:59):
Thank you, thank you.

Speaker 2 (23:02):
It's my birthday, Mike Flurry, it's a milkshake. Oh is
it just a milkshake? I can't remember?

Speaker 3 (23:10):
And he goes, we don't have that, but we have milkshakes,
and he goes vanilla or chocolate medium, and then you
go strawberry.

Speaker 2 (23:18):
I very much did not. Nobody was saying maybe it's
because I wasn't close to the speaker.

Speaker 1 (23:25):
That's true.

Speaker 2 (23:26):
Oh I can't wait. I have a feeling we're gonna
have to run around the building again and thank him
because he said sorry five times.

Speaker 1 (23:34):
I know, thank you.

Speaker 2 (23:38):
The great part of this beverage is the silent enjoyment.
Oh zero sound here. I am enjoying it. I guarantee
you could hear a pin drop because it.

Speaker 1 (23:51):
Takes a lot of power to suction up that milkshake.

Speaker 2 (23:56):
Yeah, you gotta be careful. Actually, I don't want to
burst a blood vessel in my eye.

Speaker 3 (24:01):
Hmmm.

Speaker 2 (24:04):
That is I mean, I've never accused anything of being
too chocolate.

Speaker 1 (24:08):
This is to chocolate.

Speaker 2 (24:11):
No, it's more it is as chocolatey as a piece
of chocolate.

Speaker 1 (24:15):
Wow.

Speaker 2 (24:17):
I wish Yeah, flavor Wise housed the room for the
ice because I'm basically drinking a chocolate war delicious.

Speaker 1 (24:26):
That's exciting.

Speaker 2 (24:27):
El Sid on the right, did you know that was
a It was a comedy venue when I used to
perform there often, but it was before that a restaurant
that was prison themed and each booth was behind bars,
and all the waiters were wearing prisoner outfits. And they

(24:48):
have photos of it. It seems like the craziest theme
ever from back when forty five year olds were on
the UCLA football team.

Speaker 1 (24:58):
It's like.

Speaker 2 (25:00):
Larious these photos and you can tell even by the
looks on the people's faces that they're like, this is
a weird. I'm all for prison themed.

Speaker 1 (25:11):
Events, sure, fun, but is this appropriate? Have you?

Speaker 2 (25:17):
Of course you have being a Bay Area kid gone
to the Alcatraz tour? Yes, where they have like the
recording of and you can hear as you hear the
recordings that are walking you through the prison, you can
hear hired actors like saying things in the background, and

(25:37):
they say funny things.

Speaker 1 (25:39):
They're kind of the rabble trying to make it seem realistic,
like a prison.

Speaker 2 (25:43):
You are about to make me punch you with my fist,
I said, no, one says that. Yeah, it's just it's just.

Speaker 1 (25:50):
Not in prison, they don't warn you.

Speaker 2 (25:52):
Yeah, it's just when extra's riff, you know, you know
how it is.

Speaker 1 (25:58):
I wonder if one of those extra was Robin Williams.

Speaker 2 (26:03):
What do you know of Robin Williams's earlier work? Was
he a Bay Area struggling actor?

Speaker 1 (26:10):
He was a San Fran guy. Do you want any
fries with your shake?

Speaker 2 (26:13):
Oh? Yeah, you know, I'm not going to be one
of these people that dips it in the shake. I've
seen that you can.

Speaker 1 (26:20):
Why not? You're fifty now, I you're right.

Speaker 2 (26:23):
Why don't I do it? Even though when I see it,
I walk the room, Well, there's a lid, thank you,
welcome those There's a reason people just want those fries.

Speaker 1 (26:37):
I know, they're so fucking good.

Speaker 2 (26:39):
Yeah, the flavor of other fries. Really, it's just so
obviously a potato that is something else that is chemicals.

Speaker 1 (26:49):
There's a lot of salt, sugar.

Speaker 2 (26:53):
I mean, hey, there's no escaping chemicals. They are raining
down upon us.

Speaker 1 (26:57):
They are inside us. The plastics are inside it.

Speaker 2 (27:01):
Yeah, I might as well have control over some of
the chemicals entering.

Speaker 1 (27:06):
Yeah, I get to choose.

Speaker 2 (27:08):
Yeah, uh yeah, there are those are delicious, man, right,
I feel like a gerbil.

Speaker 1 (27:16):
Why could you want more?

Speaker 2 (27:17):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (27:19):
That was my big thing, or kind of like my
secret shame, which was that I would always like after
a comedy show or like going out at night, on
my way home, I'd be like, well, I have to
get McDonald's. I'm out you know what I mean, Like,
I'm out here.

Speaker 3 (27:36):
I need to eat fries. Yeah, And then I'd be like,
what are you doing? You're not like, don't do it,
it's not worth it or whatever. But it's like there
are chemicals that are like, yes, you will do it,
and you buy it right now.

Speaker 2 (27:48):
Well, it's hard not to get into that habit. I
think mine was always Taco Bell because I don't like
to eat before a show. I'm riddled with anxiety before
to this day not as bad, but early years in Hollywood,
I'm like, well, I can't eat. I have to have

(28:08):
that frantic energy of being hungry because of one time
I was full and had low energy that dictated the
rest of my life. And so I wait till after
a show, and then I go, what's available? Oh, nothing
but drive through. Let's do it. Let's do it.

Speaker 1 (28:31):
Let's go for.

Speaker 2 (28:32):
It, you and me together, body.

Speaker 1 (28:35):
I am so sick of this car's GPS just leading
me down impossible left turns. It's all it does. It's
so irritating. Just like, here's a great way to go
to get away from traffic, take a left on sunset.
It's five pm with everyone wanting to kill you.

Speaker 2 (28:54):
Yeah. Yeah, Maybe it's elon tapping into a thing kind
of like my Instagram. It's leading me to all day things.
I am very much non interested. Now he's like, it's
all of the directions are right leaning, where it's just
you never can go left.

Speaker 1 (29:09):
He knows my political affiliation.

Speaker 2 (29:10):
He's going to fuck me over, and he loves puns.

Speaker 1 (29:13):
I already looked up by just by the bye, I
already looked up my trade in I've got my trade
in thing lined up. I'm getting rid of this car
for sure.

Speaker 2 (29:23):
Right, Well, do you remember that there are a couple
guys that he pushed out of the company m hmm
that originally conceived this car. I know for good reasons.
You bought it for good reasons. I don't beat yourself up.
And as the sticker that almost made it on your
car says, you bought it before you knew how crazy

(29:47):
he was or something like.

Speaker 1 (29:48):
That, Yeah, what an Asthley was. Yes, also that technically
that sticker made it onto the car, right, because there's
still an O and a Y and an A back there.

Speaker 2 (30:00):
Yeah. I just it's just a visual IQ test brain teaser,
which I think we're are we about to replay an
old patent episode? I think it's coming up. But his
show that show it, I am so good at it.

(30:23):
And it's because you know, how are these photos different?
Which one is a perfect mirrored image of this photo?
What is the pattern with these numbers? But it's not math,
it's just looking for patterns and things. And I remembered
a long time ago, and I'm you know, I don't brag,
but I took an IQ test in college and they

(30:46):
were like, well, this is your i Q, and I'm like,
that's there's no way because that was all stuff that
was easy for me. There's no English in math. And
they're like, yeah, that's not when an IQ is based
on you're bad at those things because you have ADHD
or whatever. Right, So it is those kind of questions.

Speaker 1 (31:08):
I want what was your IQ because I couldn't tell
if you were saying when you said that's not it?

Speaker 2 (31:13):
Well was it?

Speaker 1 (31:14):
Because it was really high or really long?

Speaker 2 (31:16):
They said it was high, but I didn't want to.
I don't remember what it was. Come on, I don't know.
I don't remember. That's see, that's the part of my brain.

Speaker 1 (31:26):
Over one thirty.

Speaker 2 (31:29):
No, I don't think so. But it was it was
one hundred something. I don't know. I do know it
was a hundred something. Wait, what is is one thirty average? No?

Speaker 1 (31:43):
No, no, it's high, okay, but I mean I think
it's it's over a hundred. I feel like the when
people brag about a rhyme and mensa right, Like, for example,
I just watched an episode of Seinfeld, which is my
new weird addict show, because I never watched it the
first time around, and now I'm.

Speaker 2 (32:02):
Sorry you didn't. Oh that's great. Have you heard it? Cheers,
you'll love it? Oh who was a mensa? But I'm
vaguely remembering.

Speaker 1 (32:12):
Elane just brags that her IQ is like pardon me,
one forty or one fifty, right or something like that,
but then once she takes the test, it's not.

Speaker 2 (32:23):
Oh right, you know whatever. Well, that's more what I
was doubting. When I took this test. It was given
to me by a ta in a lab for psycholog
like psychology credit or something yea, so it was it
was not done by like a guy in a lab
coat that's done it many times.

Speaker 1 (32:43):
It's way more legit than me taking it on like
a I was going to brag them up mine, but
it was an internet test. I had this friend that
was obsessed with IQs and like her own IQ and
being smarter than other people.

Speaker 3 (33:00):
Right, you really fucked me. But we were stoned when
we took the IQ test. I was and I got
like one thirty nine or something wild, and she was
really mad because I got higher than her, and.

Speaker 1 (33:16):
She was like, how did you do that? I don't
even know what this test is, like, this is like
you know.

Speaker 2 (33:21):
What, Oh, I think that that has a lot to
do the anxiety that I would get when a test
meant something like going towards your grade. I it bothered
me throughout all of my schooling, but this test was like, oh,
credit in a lab, sure, whatever, right, Oh, these are

(33:42):
pictures that one. Oh that's the missing piece. And then
they're like, but but sir, I'm not saying he said
the word genius, but other geniuses were mentioned by name.

Speaker 1 (33:58):
Albert Einstein.

Speaker 2 (34:00):
Albert Einstein, that's the only genius anyone can summon from memory.

Speaker 1 (34:07):
Him and Andy Richter. He's supposed to be very smart.

Speaker 2 (34:10):
Oh yeah, sure I could Yes, I could tell.

Speaker 1 (34:15):
He won Jeopardy a bunch of times. Oh really yeah,
like Celebrity Jeopardy, Jeopardy he just destroyed.

Speaker 2 (34:22):
That's amazing. What a terrible trait to be for a
side host that can only chime in every once in
a while, like, oh, I actually know exactly what should
be said right now, But I'll do my job.

Speaker 1 (34:36):
I just have to sit here and wait for the zinger.

Speaker 2 (34:40):
Oh someone has a pet snake or something?

Speaker 1 (34:44):
Is that what that is?

Speaker 2 (34:44):
I just love looking in windows.

Speaker 1 (34:46):
Are they're grown weed? Yeah? Oh yeah, there's a lot
of people walking dogs today? Is it because they just
stopped raining?

Speaker 2 (34:55):
I think dogs really love I mean it's the only
way they really get to travel the world is by
smelling new smells. And when it's rating, it's just like,
where are we Hawaii?

Speaker 1 (35:11):
You know they can't they're freaking out. Have you ever
gone to that's an air one. There's a hotel over
here that has a.

Speaker 2 (35:22):
Yeah, it's the wrap it around there. There's no rules here.
They put these sticks up. But what rideshare drivers always
park in the middle. Yes, this hotel, Michelle Bluno always
stays here. And so I've hung out by the pool
and it's it's very it's very cool.

Speaker 1 (35:38):
That pool area looks so cool.

Speaker 2 (35:40):
It is I want to go to it. It is
you can. I think you can go there and say
I'm just here for a sandwich and then just jump
in naked.

Speaker 3 (35:51):
And then order sandwich stripped down really fast. Yeah, get
in that pool.

Speaker 2 (35:56):
But still before you run out, go sorry, I got
a sandwich Earlier.

Speaker 1 (36:02):
As you're getting out of the pool, you're like, will
you hear me that sandwich?

Speaker 2 (36:04):
I have to dry off, and they're like, get chase
you out with a rolling pin.

Speaker 3 (36:08):
Get it?

Speaker 1 (36:08):
Out of here. I bought a sandwitch. I am allowed
to be here.

Speaker 2 (36:13):
I'm not done making the bread. That's why I'm showing
you this rolling pin that when we had Jake Johansson
on a decade.

Speaker 1 (36:22):
Ago, we shouldn't get him again.

Speaker 2 (36:25):
Remember how funny he was again and took this as
an assignment to like, because that was when we actually
picked up people at airport. Uh huh at airport.

Speaker 1 (36:36):
At the airport, we.

Speaker 2 (36:37):
Pick up that airport, take them to a dark alley.
What country? It's many different countries, that's all, you know.
I'm not alien and alienating a very high IQ by the.

Speaker 1 (36:49):
Way, Yeah, so much so that you could do three
and four accents at once.

Speaker 2 (36:53):
Yeah, but I can't finish a sentence. He just said sorry.
I what did he say about coin? I had a pocket?
I can't remember. It was so funny right away. And
then he talked about when we dropped him off, his
wife was gonna chase him out of the house with
a rolling pin, which made us laugh so hard because

(37:16):
that's like a reference from Andy Capp or some terrible
comic strip. I don't know, just the idea of being
chased with a rolling pin.

Speaker 3 (37:26):
I feel like that episode and if anyone cares, you
should go find it and listen to it. It's that
That's why I got into stand up, that kind of
riffing where it feels like everyone's kind of in love
with each other, Like the way he wants talking is
like yes, yes, it's like it's that energy of like
like the best first date of all time, but you're

(37:46):
just all comics friends driving around but like loving each
other's mind.

Speaker 2 (37:50):
Yeah, it's hard to I mean with this podcast has
evolved into more of a well oiled machine. Where were
you used to? We've had some big top names in
here now, but back then we were giddy children. But
we still get giddy and silly with a Bruce McCullough
or someone that we just admire.

Speaker 3 (38:10):
So remember when he called us, Remember what did he say? Oh,
my little weirdo.

Speaker 2 (38:14):
Children, my little weirdo babies, or I think it was
weirdo children. Yeah, which, like I was like a pilot
stamping wings on my little vest that I fly in
my flying vest. Is that comedy, yeah, just the stamp
of approval. Yes, But if someone calls you a baby

(38:36):
or a child or a weirdo on their own, but
from the mouth of mister Pajamas himself. That's just one
of his online personas. Hi, mister Pajamas here, that's.

Speaker 1 (38:50):
Right when he kind of walks around like he's gonna say,
I'm going to do a show in Toronto.

Speaker 2 (38:56):
Yeah, just a character solely based on the fact he
puts on pajamas before recording. Uh. Yeah, we get very
excited to riff. And it is that childhood thing, like
at a sleepover with cool kids where everyone gets so
hyper and excited, laughing and drinks too much caffeine. It's great,

(39:23):
it's it's maybe it's the fact that I'm turning exactly
one half of my life old today, but I've been yeah, yeah,
I'm going to be one hundred, and I just am
a lot of memories, childhood memories of things like that,
like parties, and I'm about to have a birthday party.

(39:43):
I haven't the last time I had a birthday party.
I invited the most hyper a group of boys that
what I had in common with them is they'd sleep
over and we'd draw pictures. So it was boys that
like to calm there and draw very well, which if
you could imagine, you put them all outside with a

(40:05):
stick in a pinionta and they're it's just all a
spectrum of ill behavior. And then these two sweet girls,
Elise and Olivia, where my friends in school, and they're
just nice, smart girls that were terrified they showed up
at my party. I didn't think, like, oh, these were

(40:28):
in fifth grade, it's totally normal to invite a group
of hyper crazy boys. And then the smartest two girls
who were all the photos were just them hiding by
the fence and froving, red faced, lunatic wielding a bat,

(40:48):
swinging at candy. And yeah, yeah, it's fourth or fifth grade,
and you know that's the age where it's like clearly
every girl figured out behavior in school and everything before
the boys. We were all just like a couple of

(41:08):
those kids probably still had some sort of a diaper on.
But oh man, it was it. I think back on
that because I remembered being embarrassed that I didn't curate
the list more and invite more friends of theirs, maybe
not just a random group of just eight kids.

Speaker 1 (41:29):
Yeah, that's it. Well, and also doing co ed that
you were a bit of a bit ahead of your.

Speaker 2 (41:33):
Time, right, Yeah, I did want everyone to know that
there was a brag in there.

Speaker 1 (41:39):
Yeah, I'll brag for you. Yeah, yeah, you won't do it,
I'll do it.

Speaker 2 (41:43):
Yeah I did. But because it backfired, and because Olivia
and a Lease were uh, it's great. I remember their names.
That's the thing. I'm remembering childhood things I hope to
remember at some point last week or this year.

Speaker 1 (42:01):
But you know what, focus on what you can remember. Yes, yes,
do gus on a Lease? Focus on Olivia?

Speaker 2 (42:07):
Yes, yes, sweet sweet girls that were terrified. And then
the years after that, I'm like, okay, wild boys only,
let's take.

Speaker 1 (42:15):
Our shirts off and go for it.

Speaker 2 (42:17):
Yeah, set up the tripod we are wrestling or there.
There'd be kids that didn't have a lot of other friends,
but they saw me as a safe person. So I
befriended kids with like emotional problems. And then I have
a party and there's this kid. They my friends like

(42:39):
wanted him to leave and it was time to sleep
and he had a hysterical breakdown. Yeah, this kid, I can't.
I do remember his name, but I don't. We don't
need to say it first and last names. No, Well,
you don't take that tone. You do it all the.

Speaker 3 (42:57):
Time, not when it's connected to having a nervous right right.

Speaker 2 (43:03):
Anyway, well, I think that was his name, but his pillow.
Everyone was yelling at him. He's like, I will leave,
knock it off. And then his pillow was close to
the space heater and burst into flames. So now, and
I remember my dad just coming down and there's a fire,
a flaming pillow and he was just tossing kids out

(43:29):
of the way of the pillow. Children were flying, and
water was poured on the pillow and it was it
was And then we all just went to sleep silently
because we were all in trouble.

Speaker 1 (43:42):
In a smoky room. Just wait, did that get Was
it his own pillow from home?

Speaker 2 (43:48):
Probably? Yeah, yeah, it was a bunch of kids, so
hopefully it wasn't one of our Back then though pillows
where you know you used him, You take the pillowcase.
Often it's just been dipped in coffee somehow.

Speaker 1 (44:04):
Yeah, just so gross.

Speaker 2 (44:05):
Now we know to buy new pillows every.

Speaker 1 (44:09):
Ten years and get the inner case and then the
outer case, right, you know.

Speaker 2 (44:14):
Yeah, we're into we're conscious of microbes. I now have
an air purifier. Multiple we have to think about what's
going into us because if you get under a microscope,
it's stuffed with six legs.

Speaker 1 (44:30):
I mean it's so if you get under a microscope,
everything is a horrifying sci fi nightmare. Right, you know
watch that habit.

Speaker 2 (44:39):
And if you're able to get physically under a microscope,
Oh the damage that's done. Your Rick Marine, You've been
shrunk your inner space.

Speaker 1 (44:48):
There's a we Got bad News for you. You're too small.

Speaker 2 (44:51):
Yeah. The original title of the Rick Branda's film We've
Got Big News called You're Too Small, and then they
did some spitballing.

Speaker 1 (45:01):
They said people aren't really getting what this is about.

Speaker 2 (45:06):
Yeah, it's one of those far fetched ideas that you
wonder how how was this movie made? But I did
watch Inner Space just for the Martin short of it.

Speaker 1 (45:17):
Right, it's so good.

Speaker 2 (45:19):
It holds up.

Speaker 1 (45:20):
Yeah, that's a good movie. It's a great movie, although it.

Speaker 3 (45:23):
Is a little claustrophobic where it's like he's inside a person.
He's just kind of stuck inside, right short.

Speaker 2 (45:29):
Yeah, it is you feel for him, you.

Speaker 1 (45:32):
Feel I don't want to be in there, I guess
is my ultimate comment.

Speaker 2 (45:37):
But the cool you don't expect the special effects to
be practically done like they when he's going into a heart,
they actually built a heart like that is pumping. It's
not just video from a monitor. Like all of the
traveling through the body is the most amazing, like probably

(46:00):
done on a tabletop, like all the effects. It's so
cool and it's just one of those movies. Why I've
been here? This is not I feel like I've been here?

Speaker 3 (46:13):
Should roll down the window so it doesn't smell like franchchise?

Speaker 2 (46:17):
Well, should we wrap wrap up this historic fifty year
birthday episode?

Speaker 1 (46:25):
Chris, Happy Birthday?

Speaker 3 (46:27):
I would like to speak on behalf of the whole
audience and say that we appreciate you and we love
you and.

Speaker 1 (46:35):
Whether you are or are not like a screensaver? Is
that what he said?

Speaker 3 (46:40):
Yes, you're a hilarious, delightful man that should live at
least twenty more years.

Speaker 2 (46:46):
Yeah. Thanks, yay, that's my favorite. It had the tone
of vopeful, but twenty thank you, twenty would be great, right,
so much, thank you. It's been a great birthday.

Speaker 3 (47:00):
Ry birthday, and you've been listening to do you need
a ride?

Speaker 1 (47:05):
Dyn Ar?

Speaker 2 (47:14):
This has been an exactly right production.

Speaker 1 (47:17):
Our senior producer is Annalise Nelson.

Speaker 2 (47:20):
Mixed by Edson Choy, our.

Speaker 1 (47:22):
Talent booker is Patrick Cootner.

Speaker 2 (47:24):
Theme song by Karen Kilgareth, artwork by Chris Fairbanks.

Speaker 3 (47:28):
Follow the show on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook at dinar
podcast That's d y n ar Podcast.

Speaker 2 (47:35):
For more information, go to exactly rightmedia dot com.

Speaker 1 (47:38):
Thank you, Oh You're welcome.

Speaker 2 (47:44):
We flipped. We flipped.

Speaker 1 (47:46):
We flipped the script after fourteen years
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Karen Kilgariff

Karen Kilgariff

Chris Fairbanks

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