Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
The Breakfast Club wanting everybody is j n V just hilarious.
Charlamagne the guy. We are the Breakfast Club. We got
a special guest in the building.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Yes, sir, that Grbo.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
Welcome and congratulations man the number one record a couple
of weeks ago.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Grass Man, thank you. I'm good.
Speaker 3 (00:20):
I'm good.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
I'm glad to be here. I do feel number one record.
I feel good. I'm not gonna lie. I feel great.
It feel great.
Speaker 4 (00:27):
I'll just be trying to like stay in the moment
really just just keep it like up you know, like
when you where you got those type of moments you
just trying to figure out like all right, well I
me personally, like I gotta figure out what's the next
best thing, Like what do I do next?
Speaker 2 (00:42):
From that?
Speaker 4 (00:42):
Like I try to live in a moment and grasp
up that energy, but just keep it going, like I'm
not trying to catch another number one.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
I'm just trying to keep it going.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
Did you expect that to be the record because it's
not your typical of course, Well, it was just you
just spitting nah, hell no, for sure.
Speaker 4 (00:56):
I was just literally I can't say it enough. It
was just me just having fun in the studio. I
was in New York and was in the studio me
south Side Smack and you know the south Side, Like
I really, I'd be having to give a lot of
credit to Big Bro because he want the only people
that could tell me, like, rap on this, just rap
on this and figure it out like just rap. And
(01:17):
that's what I did, and that that changed my life.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
As a single.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Who picked it as a single? Like was it just
I was just gonna release and see what happened, and
it just took over.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
And that's what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (01:28):
That's why, like, as artists, you gotta like really just
bet on yourself for real, for real, because I was
in a mode of just trying to do music and
see what the streets connected to. I didn't even like
that song came out and December on my app.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
I got an.
Speaker 4 (01:44):
App on my own app, like where I just put
out music material content. All this is just for the
people who really support me. Like you know what I'm saying,
My fans, they know about the Jeerbo app. I put
it out on my app on a project that I
was just recording all samples too. I did a project
with all samples and it couldn't even go on Apple Music.
(02:05):
It couldn't go on DSPs. You know what I'm saying. Like,
I put it out on the app in December, and
the label put it out on DSPs in like March April.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
So it's like you guys, just try just see what
the streets congratulations on your app appreciate it. Has it
changed the bag? Has that single changed your bag? Absolutely?
See I'll be thinking that.
Speaker 5 (02:25):
You know a lot of people be fronting on like
the power of radio and having a big radio record
speak to that.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
Man. For sure.
Speaker 4 (02:32):
I've always been like I knew because I've been independent
this whole time, So I know about like analytics, I
know about like residuals, I know what, like one record
could really change your life, you know what I'm saying. Like,
and I finally caught that record that like that life
changed the record.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
So yeah, the bag been crazy.
Speaker 5 (02:49):
The royalties from radio are better than the streaming.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
Yeah, absolutely for sure.
Speaker 4 (02:54):
And it's like once you once you get a song
that really go radio, it's like it's just like it
just changed everything.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Real change the places you actually perform a for sure.
Speaker 4 (03:06):
Exactly like you could put you could put you put
money in radio for sure, for what to do what
it's supposed to do. But just like even like it's
a difference between like putting something in radio for just
get on the radio, but to get like rhythmic play
rip playlists, you know what I'm saying. Like all of that,
it's just a big super difference. Like I'll be talking
to like Make all the time. And just like once
(03:28):
you get a record, like I'm not even talking about
what legit, Like there's certain records that like the format
where you know it could go radio, you know what
I'm saying, Like I feel like every artist, all you
need is like one radio record a year, just one,
Like you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Ain't easy.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
It's not easy at all.
Speaker 4 (03:44):
But like you know, hit Maker, that's my big brother,
Like he the god of this, like you know what
I'm saying, Like he know the whole formal He do
it like and that's why he's so rich. Like that
riches because he on radio every year at least point
it out right suit her Willow herb. I was just
trying to like tap into like that old hunger, like
(04:08):
my old self. And when I be rapping good and
like I'll be reading the comments and sometimes my fans
be like, oh that ain't dang you heard what that's
Little Herd. You know what I'm saying, Like, I feel
like that was like one of my best eras of rap.
Like I always been able to rap all my mom
I'm an EMC, so it's like I don't care if
I'm not even all the way tapped into like my
(04:29):
confidence and all of this. I'm always gonna be able
to rap good, you feel me, But like once you
really focus on straight rap, it's different. And that's what
I was trying to do. So that's why I went
and like name my album Little Herb. Like I was
going up like listening to old interviews, listening to old
music videos and I mean watch old music videos, listen
to old songs and things like that, and like I
(04:53):
was just trying to find like a higher level of.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
Rap for myself, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (05:00):
Like, and I say this all the time, like you
could really get caught up in what's in front of you,
Like always been the type of person like I say
this a lot a lot of rooms that I was in,
I wasn't really in the rooms, you know what I'm saying,
because I'm thinking about like my past, I'm thinking about
what I gotta do when I get out the room.
Like I'm just saying what's up, Like there's certain conversations
(05:21):
that I really couldn't have because my mind is all
over the place, you feel me, Like so like in
this like era where I am mentally, I was just
trying to.
Speaker 2 (05:31):
Like find that old hunger that made me enjoy what.
Speaker 4 (05:35):
I have now, Like you know what I'm saying, Like
like that's that's why I really name my project Little Herb,
because like you were, like on the day to day,
I'm thirty years old. I'm been rapping since I was
like sixteen for real, for real, Like you feel me,
and I was trying to figure out like damn, like
like all the steps to that it took me to
get here. You feel what I'm saying, Like I forgot
(05:56):
a lot. I'm not gonna lie. It's a lot of
that I did that I forgot. So it's like I
want to to make myself remember, so I had to
like go back in and like tap in on my
old self.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
For real.
Speaker 5 (06:06):
I heard you say, a Little Herb is a full
circle moment, and it's a return to the fundamentals.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
But you closing the chapter on the little herb area.
Speaker 5 (06:13):
What what is closing that chapter actually look like?
Speaker 4 (06:16):
Closing that chapter is like for real, just letting go,
Like there's a lot of I held on to that
I just don't need no more, like for real, for real,
like the street therapy right there, just letting go for
real real and it is. It is definitely therapy that
helped me. It's like a lot of that you hold
on to you just like just let it go, Just
(06:37):
let it go and just let it find you. You
know what I'm saying, Like, no, for real, Like I
was one of the people that just like my heart
is so big, and I feel.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
Like people knew that, Like people knew.
Speaker 4 (06:49):
That, Like they grabbed me, and I'm grabbing them back,
you feel what I'm saying, Like I'm holding on to
that type of It's like that's just letting that chapter go.
Speaker 2 (06:56):
Like and people been saying.
Speaker 4 (06:58):
This to me for years and I've been on it,
but I never really acted on it. Like I shouldn't
focus on nothing but music and my family and like God,
like that's the only thing that I should wake up
and care about.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
I shouldn't really give a fuck.
Speaker 4 (07:10):
About how somebody else eat or how somebody else get
the work or get the sleep of any of that,
and not worried about that for years. Like let's be
closing that chapter, like I'm gonna tap into this, tell
my story and just let go for let go and
let God for real for and that go for everything
and everybody. And it's a whole nother chapter. Open it
for me because everything that got me here, I don't.
(07:34):
I don't even really have it no more for real,
for like all my friends did, I'm Finn be a real,
one hundred percent independent artist, Like I don't got no label,
no production company. I'm one hundred percent a real new
person and a new artist. So it's like I just
want to just tap into this do what I need
to do. And I'm already doing it for real, but
(07:55):
just like letting go for real, like I don't. I
don't want to have no attachments other than family.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
All we got more with g Herbal when we come back,
it's the breakfast club, good morning, huh.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
Every day, some new people with my right now, but
life still live, trying down the strip. Half a million dollars,
whip five ms, but a can't for ice like this.
Everything I want to hit, I've cut them off. The
list asks about me word around the town.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
I'm a pillow. I won't get my heart. I'm putting
it at I'm not a sell big o Gee.
Speaker 4 (08:47):
I'm him parked the back the lamb and then go
g l e I'm tripped catching lamb brick daeween.
Speaker 5 (08:52):
And like this.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
Oh you know that rap comes to the rack.
Speaker 4 (08:55):
No cake for got them racks back, man, my partice
stack will lick all blue hand like flat tax. That's
a tumble in my nestack.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
Everybody Larry Charlamade and the guy we ared to practice
Club g Herbo is here. Now you talk about Meek
Mill changing your life, right, yeah, he was your inspiration, man,
break that down to what you see the meat that
made you think that you can do it.
Speaker 4 (09:18):
I've just got done listening to We're Gonna get this
money right now on my way here. Like Meek is
my favorite rapper for real, bro, it's my big brother.
And I was just with Meek last night. We just
did a song last we was in the studio last night,
I believe. But like I used to listen to me
and watch me when he was a battle rapper, but
when he really got rich and made this happen, it's
like all right, but that like it's different from me
(09:41):
watching like Wayne and whole Man, you know what I'm saying,
Like I couldn't like I could relate to it.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
But it's like.
Speaker 4 (09:50):
When I grew up and me, I've seen him the
rich already, Like I seen Meek turn rich, coming from
the streets and going through all this that he went
through and really like talking about it and preaching like
positivity and motivation. That made me feel like I just
want to be like that for real real, Like that
could really like help me grow into the artist that
(10:12):
I am today, for real real because like damn, like
it's Meek, Like it's not like he was an artist
and he was like far away, you feel what I'm saying,
Like I felt like I could grasp on to that
and become that, Like this is a real streak that
became the biggest in the world, Like he became the
biggest best rat and he's a rap guy.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Like I love rapping.
Speaker 4 (10:35):
I'm an mc so, I studied that first and foremost,
but just a blueprinter like and like he like.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
He gave you the real blueprint, like you get on,
you take care, you do what you supposed to do.
Speaker 4 (10:47):
You take care of your family, your mother like to
make me like I just used to have to just
get money to my mama, just like thinking about that
type of you know what I'm saying, Like I retire
my mom when I was sixteen years old, bro literally
and they put a lot of press showed me. I
told my mama stopped working when I was sixteen. She
never worked since, but take care of her, my aunties,
my whole family since I was sixteen.
Speaker 2 (11:08):
That's a lot of pressure, a lot of pressure.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
Now you're the meat meal for a lot of these
younger artists, So what do you show them to show
them that they can do it?
Speaker 2 (11:17):
What do you do different?
Speaker 1 (11:18):
So because you know, you got a lot of kids
watching it and they want.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
To be arrible for sure.
Speaker 4 (11:22):
Like for me, it's I just try to like what's
the word, like you gotta like show them like like
what meat did for real, like tangible.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
You just gotta show the like I like.
Speaker 4 (11:33):
The thing with me that I feel like make a
difference a lot is I let people see me in
a physical like you gotta see it like have conversations
like seeing this, believing you feel what I'm saying, Like
you know you could do this when you could actually
get in front of somebody like me. Growing up, I
never seen nobody that I looked up to, and I
wanted to be like in front of me talking to me.
(11:53):
You know what I'm saying, Like I just had to
have a man power, like I could do it. I'm
gonna do it, you knowel what I'm saying. And it
happened for me. And when I got a certain age
like nineteen twenty eight, like those ages when I started
traveling and having conversations with people that I looked up to,
But like fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, them years really matter whereas
like you know what I'm saying, I try to be
(12:15):
the person where I just go back and do certain
things and go touch the community, and you know what
I'm saying, tell them that they could really make it,
like this is nothing for real, like but like and
I ain't gonna say it's nothing like it's it's a task.
For sure, it's hard, but it's easy at the same time.
All you gotta do is wake up and strive to
(12:37):
go get it and want to do it and believe
that you could do it. You just got to have
a vision, you feel what I'm saying. And when I
go look at like these kids and be going to
talk and have conversations, like they got the same power
that I got, Like they really got something in them.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
They just don't think it's possible.
Speaker 4 (12:54):
This is really possible, like they when you wake up
and all you got is this four block radius and
your hood and that you're dealing with every day, you
think that's your life, but it's like it's so much
outside of that.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
All you gotta know is how to break that cycle.
Speaker 4 (13:08):
And you know what I'm saying, Like, that's that's the
thing with me, Like I feel like that's what make
a difference in why people like believe in me because
I try.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
I let him touch me, I let them, you know
what I'm saying, pauls Like, you know what I'm saying.
I go see the people. I'm thinking about something now.
Speaker 5 (13:24):
And you made me think about it when you said
you've been rapping since she was nineteen, because I can
remember like your first I can remember your first early
breakfast club interviews, right. But then it started getting me
thinking about all of these artists we've seen from Chicago
that have come through come through here the past fifteen years.
You talk about what's possible. Man, you are proof that's
surviving as possible. Chief keepers, proof that surviving is sure.
(13:47):
So so definitely, you know what I mean. People like
Dirk that's locked up, people like Bo that's no longer here,
plenty of artists you probably interview from Chicago.
Speaker 2 (13:54):
How does that feel feel? Great?
Speaker 5 (13:56):
Man?
Speaker 4 (13:57):
You know, and I'm gonna say this again, I'm gonna
shall make out real quick because he just told me
the other day, and this it feel different. It's a
different feeling than him saying. It's like he's like, man,
want you to chosen one. It's certain things that just
affect you differently, you know what I'm saying. And I
learned that from the streets, Like I didn't bump my
(14:17):
head so many times and did so much and been
arrested and fell off and came back or whatever the
case may be.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (14:24):
It's like when you do certain things, God just punish
you differently because you can't get away with that, you
know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
Like you would think you would see somebody else doing
it like, oh.
Speaker 4 (14:33):
He did it, and you can't do that because God
got a different path for you. And surviving in Chicago,
just making it out of the streets alone is a blessing.
Like it's literally like I'd be seeing some of my
homies and certain people that just like and I understand
that other people don't get it. Like it's certain people
where you just like you just like wash your hands
(14:55):
with everything. I know certain there was real menaces in
the streets that don't do nothing but just be at
home with their girl and their kids now because they
just want peace.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
Like, damn, I made it out there. I can't believe
I'm still alive.
Speaker 4 (15:08):
Like a lot of people never experience life to that
capacity where they're just grateful that they're alive, that they
still here, you knowe what I'm saying. And it's a
lot of people when it comes surviving, you gotta make
decisions and it got to be calculated, and it's a
lot of people that's just raised off survival.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
When you will do anything, it's a difference like when.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
You survive and you just raised off survival, Like I'm
trying to explain that with Like, it's certain people where
if you just like survival is your first instinct.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
You will do anything right.
Speaker 4 (15:41):
You would kill your closest friend, you a snitch, rob,
steal from your mama, your grandma, And you gotta understand this,
like it's just life. It's certain people who don't know
nothing else. They was raised off of survival. They mother
and father raised them off of survivals. So it's like
a lot of people don't understand that, you know what
(16:02):
I'm saying, It's just me being here today. I try to,
Like I think that's one of the reasons why, like
I probably got took advantage of so much because I
understand both sides of the fence, and I try to
get everybody the benefit of the doubt, you know what
I'm saying, Like I try to like think about putting
myself in other people's shoes before I make a decision,
(16:23):
you know what I'm saying. Like I always before I
do anything, I always think about the consequences, repercussions, everything.
So if I do something to anybody or do anything,
I thought about it so many times I'm comfortable with
having it play out, you know what I'm saying, And
like you, like it's only certain people that think like that,
especially in life and coming from Chicago, you got to
(16:45):
think about both sides of the fence. It's certain people
that think a lot, and it's certain people that don't
think at all. You feel me and like it's a
blessing to be here for sure. For sure, because I've
seen a lot. I experienced a lot. I've seen a
lot of death, and I just come from one of
the toughest neighborhoods in Chicago, like one of the most
poverty struck in neighborhoods where it's like I was a
(17:06):
kid and people used to like a lady walked out.
I think I said this before on a breakfast club
interview when I was when I was in Shorty, Like
a lady walked up on me. I'm waiting on my mom.
She coming from the launder. Mail lady walked up on me,
like you got some sea. I'm like mm, She like what.
Speaker 2 (17:22):
I'm like what. She's like, you got some ce? She
asks for crack.
Speaker 4 (17:25):
I'm like nine years old, I'm like nineteen, wait on
my mama to come in the house, like you got
some See.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
I'm like what.
Speaker 4 (17:33):
Yeah, she asked me if I had cracked, literally a
kid three in the morning I'm outside because that's now
your selling crack for real, for real, Like when.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
Did you get something? That's the statute of limitations with
this call like some crack. It's a statute of limitations,
for sure. We got more with g Herbo when we
come back. It's the Breakfast Club morning. If this world
(18:02):
was my, Hey Roman, normal.
Speaker 3 (18:04):
Seven bay drop it like it's hot. If this world
was a mine, not taking dreams and making the most
a fly? If this world was mine, not taking in
amazing in front of God and should do something to
that light Hit them strictly with that five fi five
five five five fine five, Hey Roman normal, seven bay
(18:26):
drop it like it's hot. If this world was a mine,
not taking dreams and made the most apply. If this
world was mine, not taking in an amazing in front
of God and should do something to that light hit
them strictly with the five.
Speaker 2 (18:38):
It's a video dance.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
Let a watch you a fan?
Speaker 2 (18:41):
He a fly, It's just one of Kumbaya. Nah, it's
swell count peas always girl, God.
Speaker 1 (18:51):
Warning, everybody's the DJ Envy just Hilarie Charlamagne the God.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
We are the Breakfast Club.
Speaker 5 (18:56):
We're still kicking it with g Herbal that therapeutic was
just album in regard to your grieving process, because I
hear you mentioned your brother a lot, especially on Give
It All.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
How did that help?
Speaker 4 (19:07):
I ain't gonna lie that I've been dealing with del
since I was a kid, bro Like I lost I
started losing friends when I was like fourteen years old,
you know, Like, and I'm talking about that, I'm touching
on that my and my hour, my project. But you
gotta really like realize I'm thirty years old. I've been
losing people I love for fifteen years and still managing
(19:30):
to wake up and make it happen and beg herbo
and take pictures and smile for the fans, Like I
really didn't lost some of my best friends and had
to go do a show that same day, you.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
Know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (19:43):
Like my homie cap did twenty fifteen, I had to
perform in front of ten thousand people.
Speaker 2 (19:47):
I just had to find it emmy. A lot of
people can't do that.
Speaker 4 (19:50):
A lot of people like now I just lost my
homie fish going to go spind like I want to
go do the show. So it's like I feel like
I'm really destined for this shows my own destiny. I
chose my own path, and I'm saying that, like for
me the experience all of that death and I feel
like I was numb to it. When my little brother died,
it changed my life. That was some of the worst
(20:12):
pain that I ever felt in my life ever, Like
I could never I never could fathom, like and I'm
a street Like when I wake out, when I walk
out the house, I feel like I'm gonna die, Like
you know, like I really feel like that, and that's
what get me home. You feel what I'm saying, like
every step, every move that I take is calculated. And
(20:33):
I never felt like he was gonna die, you know
what I'm saying. Like, no, boys, I never ever think
like him. Hell No, I just I never thought he
was going to die. Every day I wake out, wake up,
I really feel like I'm gonna die. I feel like
somebody would do something to me. And that's just the
life I live.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
And that's just you still feel like that because I
remember the last time you said you feel like that,
you said you would go into therapy to help you
get and it helped me with.
Speaker 2 (20:56):
It helped me with it.
Speaker 4 (20:57):
But like, nah, hell no, and I'm glad that even
going through therapy and like growing and healing the way
that I've healed in my life, I'm kind of glad
that I never lost that edge for real, because that's
how I protect myself, That's how I protect my children,
That's how I make sure I get back home. You feel,
I'm saying, like, I'm not out here thucking. I ain't
(21:18):
wild and I ain't doing no crazy. Some days I
leave the house and it just be just me by myself,
no security, nothing, But I'm still on point. I'm still
watching my back, I'm still aware of my surroundings, you
feel I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
So it's like, I'm glad that I never lost that
edge for real, for real.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
And when like going back to what you know, what
I'm saying, what you said, Charla Mane, Like when my
little brother died, I lost myself, Like I became an alcoholic,
like a badass alcoholic. I never used to drink bro
I used to drink a fifth of liquor every single day,
just like every day by myself. Like, and my girl
was pregnant when he died, you feel me like, and
(21:57):
I was like I was trying to like be that
week around her you feel me? Because she she know
I didn't been through like she didn't been around me,
and I hadn't lost homies, you know what I'm saying. Like,
and she used to like say, like snap out of it,
like you feel me, Like she used to like say it,
but it's like I can't.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
It was just so hard for me.
Speaker 4 (22:16):
I really couldn't for real, Like I used to have
to leave the house just to go cry, like set
of God, like just go get in the con just
cry for hour straight because I didn't want to do
that in front of her. And I felt like I
should have. I should have, I should have.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
But I was like I don't know. I just And
when she said snap out of it, what does she mean?
Speaker 4 (22:35):
Like not snap out of the grief, snap out of
the healing, snap out of the crashing out like drinking,
drinking every day and wanting to go to the club
and just feel something because I really can't feel nothing,
you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
Like that was like that's what she used to tell
me to snap out of and it was like it
was hard. Man, I ain't gonna lie.
Speaker 5 (22:53):
I want to go back to one thing you said
in regards to how you react to death, because you know,
staying busy as a response to trauma, right, and we
saw that in real time, if you don't mind me
bringing it up, Like like people don't know to day
your father passed, God blessed it. I came here, you
was scheduled to do a breakfast club interview. You came
in the studio and still wanted to do it, like
(23:14):
bro go home, like what And I love you forever
for that because I really was here to do that.
Speaker 4 (23:21):
And it's like that's the thing, like I'm so used
to death and used to just like I didn't even
process it for real, like I came here because it's
like I really was in my head trying to forget
that my dad is dead. But I gotta like understand it.
I gotta know, like, yeah, my pop's just that today.
I need to process that. Like and you had just
got the news while you was in the on the way, Yeah,
(23:44):
my dad was in the hospital. I knew he was
sick and I found out he died, and I just
came here.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
I don't know. I just like I don't even like
what are you doing? Like we're not doing h No.
He told me like bro. Just go home, like just
leave bro for real. For the rest of that day,
Like what did you do? Did you reflect on it?
Were you afraid to even? I was afraid.
Speaker 4 (24:07):
I was afraid because like when you lose a parent,
that's different, real real my dad, like I didn't. I
didn't have an absent father, like my father been living
with me my entire life, like my mother and my
dad been together forty years for real, for real, like
and I think I was just trying to like not
feel it, like not processing, like you.
Speaker 2 (24:27):
Know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (24:28):
I was just like, all right, ben, let me just
do it, and like that's the that's the problem, Like
that's the thing, Like you feel like, all right, let
me just do it and push through this, and this
is my job, this is my life. Like you got
to put that to the side. Sometimes when you're going
through things like that, you feel what I'm saying. And
the rest of that day for me was really just
like I was scared, Like I ain't want to call
my mama. I didn't want to talk to my sister.
(24:48):
It took me so long, and just asked my sister,
are you okay?
Speaker 2 (24:51):
How you doing? It was super hard? You were okay.
Speaker 4 (24:54):
Yeah, Like I was scared to like have them conversations
with her, like how you feeling?
Speaker 2 (24:59):
You know what I'm saying?
Speaker 4 (25:00):
My mom like I keep my mom close to me,
and my mom like this you feel me and I
know it, like I could see it. I know she
was not okay, And I used to avoid them conversations,
you know what I'm saying, Like she would bring stuff
up and like send me pictures and all that.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
It was it was like I didn't have been in therapy.
Speaker 4 (25:19):
I'm a person that's not like shy from my emotions,
like I'm intune my emotions all of that. But just
like it was hard because like for me, just I
just thought he hit more time, Like I just wanted
him to be here. So I wasn't trying to like
live in reality because I'm still I was still grieving
my little brother, you feel what I'm saying. So when
that happened, it was just like I didn't want to
(25:40):
believe that my dad was dead because I'll be on
the road sometimes I go eight months without seeing my pops.
So it's like you feel me, like eight nine months
without seeing them at all. Sometimes I go months without
talking to him. So I was trying to like tap
into that, like you feel me, like, let me just
get that mentality like he like he here, but you
know what I'm saying, but he my my pop's really
(26:02):
Like that's crazy. I think about that every day, like
man really died on me, and it's crazy. Like I
pray every day, like I pray so much because my pops,
my last conversation with him. My dad died the day
after his birthday, like my birthday October eighth, my dad
birthday October sixteenth. He died on seventeen and my last
conversation with him, I called him. I said every birthday.
(26:24):
I said, man, you're on your way. Boy, you're getting old.
You're getting old?
Speaker 2 (26:28):
What? And he died?
Speaker 4 (26:29):
Like that was the last thing I said to my pops,
Like boy, you on your way. Boy, you about to
be seventy. You know what I'm saying, Like you getting old?
Stop getting old?
Speaker 2 (26:40):
A dream like you said that I was on my way. Yeah,
I hope. So I want him to now you haven't check.
I want him to. I hope he.
Speaker 4 (26:48):
I hope he's telling me that the night like that
be a lot of comfort for real, for real, Like.
Speaker 5 (26:52):
Is it hard to write about. I mean, like I said,
you right about your brother now? Yeah, but brother would
have three years ago five is so is it hard?
It's hard to put that on paper right now.
Speaker 4 (27:03):
And in a way like only like I'll just like
for sure, like in a way I just rap about
like my pop's passing.
Speaker 2 (27:10):
I never like I didn't got all the way, like
I didn't.
Speaker 4 (27:13):
Made songs like paying how much to my brother, like
give it all that song it's about my brother, and
made songs just talking about how I felt that day,
Like I didn't made multiple songs about my brother died,
like I ain't did that for my pop.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
Shit all I said on Wax for Real is just
like my dad did. Like I never spoke about the
emotions how I felt, none of that.
Speaker 4 (27:33):
So yeah, it is definitely tough because I don't know
I feel like mentally or just where I met in life,
like I ain't been able to tap into that pain.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
We want to get into something with that.
Speaker 1 (27:45):
But what you want to hear that? Man, Let's play
give it out. It's one of my favorite songs, and
we appreciate you for joining us. Brother pick up her
at album this week. See Her gets the breakfast, talk about.
Speaker 2 (28:01):
I give it off, no for the money. In the
same give it off the money.
Speaker 4 (28:07):
Take me back in two thousand and five when I
ain't even wrapped, falling in the alley. It's against pockets flat.
But we was happy and my head was snappy.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
Riding on the bus. Ain't had no traffic.
Speaker 4 (28:17):
It was just seeing you.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
Shoty. Now you're going with them, going through shouting you
pick up whatever you.
Speaker 4 (28:21):
Call, passed the bill, but we had too soft trying
to catch the old that a new party brought. Wasn't
that for you? I'm side now My drugs wait too
often because I've seen you in a comfort and I
should have been there with you because I would have
been tossed. And can't never forget that. They remember they
all lost their whole game. Got a real pint because
we've been neling. The crosses almost made us pump. I'm
already pumped up.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
Getting your mold.
Speaker 4 (28:43):
It's an ice out one fifty parm I gottam floss up.
Make it back to high school. Yeah, we had it hard,
but we were soft up. Living fast. You with the
passenger and all was the track. Honker had a whole
I was getting mad at us every bitch walking. I
was blowing my gun at fifteenth and they won't be.
They just tossed and hit the rules when those when
sixteen had them all with we with the always top
from jet to jet. That's like though, finally gonna check
(29:03):
the check like a psycho. Tipsy can't to wipe me
a bodio. We ran trains and holds in Ohio. That's
my brain that only God know. You told me stuff
only I know, and you CHURCHI grows to ma bro
shut off. Fine, so that's my final Who here that
and became a savage?
Speaker 2 (29:15):
Let us block go. That's on rock though happy we
ever felt it.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
Real pain make you turn selfish when it's sane because
you couldn't help it. Now your brain thinking about the
old age that this should never be the same because
I lost my brother to that game. All I see
is flames. I'm a fire burning in my eyes
The Breakfast Club wanting everybody is j n V just hilarious.
Charlamagne the guy. We are the Breakfast Club. We got
a special guest in the building.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Yes, sir, that Grbo.
Speaker 1 (00:13):
Welcome and congratulations man the number one record a couple
of weeks ago.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Grass Man, thank you. I'm good.
Speaker 3 (00:20):
I'm good.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
I'm glad to be here. I do feel number one record.
I feel good. I'm not gonna lie. I feel great.
It feel great.
Speaker 4 (00:27):
I'll just be trying to like stay in the moment
really just just keep it like up you know, like
when you where you got those type of moments you
just trying to figure out like all right, well I
me personally, like I gotta figure out what's the next
best thing, Like what do I do next?
Speaker 2 (00:42):
From that?
Speaker 4 (00:42):
Like I try to live in a moment and grasp
up that energy, but just keep it going, like I'm
not trying to catch another number one.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
I'm just trying to keep it going.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
Did you expect that to be the record because it's
not your typical of course, Well, it was just you
just spitting nah, hell no, for sure.
Speaker 4 (00:56):
I was just literally I can't say it enough. It
was just me just having fun in the studio. I
was in New York and was in the studio me
south Side Smack and you know the south Side, Like
I really, I'd be having to give a lot of
credit to Big Bro because he want the only people
that could tell me, like, rap on this, just rap
on this and figure it out like just rap. And
(01:17):
that's what I did, and that that changed my life.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
As a single.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Who picked it as a single? Like was it just
I was just gonna release and see what happened, and
it just took over.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
And that's what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (01:28):
That's why, like, as artists, you gotta like really just
bet on yourself for real, for real, because I was
in a mode of just trying to do music and
see what the streets connected to. I didn't even like
that song came out and December on my app.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
I got an.
Speaker 4 (01:44):
App on my own app, like where I just put
out music material content. All this is just for the
people who really support me. Like you know what I'm saying,
My fans, they know about the Jeerbo app. I put
it out on my app on a project that I
was just recording all samples too. I did a project
with all samples and it couldn't even go on Apple Music.
(02:05):
It couldn't go on DSPs. You know what I'm saying. Like,
I put it out on the app in December, and
the label put it out on DSPs in like March April.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
So it's like you guys, just try just see what
the streets congratulations on your app appreciate it. Has it
changed the bag? Has that single changed your bag? Absolutely?
See I'll be thinking that.
Speaker 5 (02:25):
You know a lot of people be fronting on like
the power of radio and having a big radio record
speak to that.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
Man. For sure.
Speaker 4 (02:32):
I've always been like I knew because I've been independent
this whole time, So I know about like analytics, I
know about like residuals, I know what, like one record
could really change your life, you know what I'm saying. Like,
and I finally caught that record that like that life
changed the record.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
So yeah, the bag been crazy.
Speaker 5 (02:49):
The royalties from radio are better than the streaming.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
Yeah, absolutely for sure.
Speaker 4 (02:54):
And it's like once you once you get a song
that really go radio, it's like it's just like it
just changed everything.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Real change the places you actually perform a for sure.
Speaker 4 (03:06):
Exactly like you could put you could put you put
money in radio for sure, for what to do what
it's supposed to do. But just like even like it's
a difference between like putting something in radio for just
get on the radio, but to get like rhythmic play
rip playlists, you know what I'm saying. Like all of that,
it's just a big super difference. Like I'll be talking
to like Make all the time. And just like once
(03:28):
you get a record, like I'm not even talking about
what legit, Like there's certain records that like the format
where you know it could go radio, you know what
I'm saying, Like I feel like every artist, all you
need is like one radio record a year, just one,
Like you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Ain't easy.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
It's not easy at all.
Speaker 4 (03:44):
But like you know, hit Maker, that's my big brother,
Like he the god of this, like you know what
I'm saying, Like he know the whole formal He do
it like and that's why he's so rich. Like that
riches because he on radio every year at least point
it out right suit her Willow herb. I was just
trying to like tap into like that old hunger, like
(04:08):
my old self. And when I be rapping good and
like I'll be reading the comments and sometimes my fans
be like, oh that ain't dang you heard what that's
Little Herd. You know what I'm saying, Like, I feel
like that was like one of my best eras of rap.
Like I always been able to rap all my mom
I'm an EMC, so it's like I don't care if
I'm not even all the way tapped into like my
(04:29):
confidence and all of this. I'm always gonna be able
to rap good, you feel me, But like once you
really focus on straight rap, it's different. And that's what
I was trying to do. So that's why I went
and like name my album Little Herb. Like I was
going up like listening to old interviews, listening to old
music videos and I mean watch old music videos, listen
to old songs and things like that, and like I
(04:53):
was just trying to find like a higher level of.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
Rap for myself, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (05:00):
Like, and I say this all the time, like you
could really get caught up in what's in front of you,
Like always been the type of person like I say
this a lot a lot of rooms that I was in,
I wasn't really in the rooms, you know what I'm saying,
because I'm thinking about like my past, I'm thinking about
what I gotta do when I get out the room.
Like I'm just saying what's up, Like there's certain conversations
(05:21):
that I really couldn't have because my mind is all
over the place, you feel me, Like so like in
this like era where I am mentally, I was just
trying to.
Speaker 2 (05:31):
Like find that old hunger that made me enjoy what.
Speaker 4 (05:35):
I have now, Like you know what I'm saying, Like
like that's that's why I really name my project Little Herb,
because like you were, like on the day to day,
I'm thirty years old. I'm been rapping since I was
like sixteen for real, for real, Like you feel me,
and I was trying to figure out like damn, like
like all the steps to that it took me to
get here. You feel what I'm saying, Like I forgot
(05:56):
a lot. I'm not gonna lie. It's a lot of
that I did that I forgot. So it's like I
want to to make myself remember, so I had to
like go back in and like tap in on my
old self.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
For real.
Speaker 5 (06:06):
I heard you say, a Little Herb is a full
circle moment, and it's a return to the fundamentals.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
But you closing the chapter on the little herb area.
Speaker 5 (06:13):
What what is closing that chapter actually look like?
Speaker 4 (06:16):
Closing that chapter is like for real, just letting go,
Like there's a lot of I held on to that
I just don't need no more, like for real, for real,
like the street therapy right there, just letting go for
real real and it is. It is definitely therapy that
helped me. It's like a lot of that you hold
on to you just like just let it go, Just
(06:37):
let it go and just let it find you. You
know what I'm saying, Like, no, for real, Like I
was one of the people that just like my heart
is so big, and I feel.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
Like people knew that, Like people knew.
Speaker 4 (06:49):
That, Like they grabbed me, and I'm grabbing them back,
you feel what I'm saying, Like I'm holding on to
that type of It's like that's just letting that chapter go.
Speaker 2 (06:56):
Like and people been saying.
Speaker 4 (06:58):
This to me for years and I've been on it,
but I never really acted on it. Like I shouldn't
focus on nothing but music and my family and like God,
like that's the only thing that I should wake up
and care about.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
I shouldn't really give a fuck.
Speaker 4 (07:10):
About how somebody else eat or how somebody else get
the work or get the sleep of any of that,
and not worried about that for years. Like let's be
closing that chapter, like I'm gonna tap into this, tell
my story and just let go for let go and
let God for real for and that go for everything
and everybody. And it's a whole nother chapter. Open it
for me because everything that got me here, I don't.
(07:34):
I don't even really have it no more for real,
for like all my friends did, I'm Finn be a real,
one hundred percent independent artist, Like I don't got no label,
no production company. I'm one hundred percent a real new
person and a new artist. So it's like I just
want to just tap into this do what I need
to do. And I'm already doing it for real, but
(07:55):
just like letting go for real, like I don't. I
don't want to have no attachments other than family.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
All we got more with g Herbal when we come back,
it's the breakfast club, good morning, huh.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
Every day, some new people with my right now, but
life still live, trying down the strip. Half a million dollars,
whip five ms, but a can't for ice like this.
Everything I want to hit, I've cut them off. The
list asks about me word around the town.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
I'm a pillow. I won't get my heart. I'm putting
it at I'm not a sell big o Gee.
Speaker 4 (08:47):
I'm him parked the back the lamb and then go
g l e I'm tripped catching lamb brick daeween.
Speaker 5 (08:52):
And like this.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
Oh you know that rap comes to the rack.
Speaker 4 (08:55):
No cake for got them racks back, man, my partice
stack will lick all blue hand like flat tax. That's
a tumble in my nestack.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
Everybody Larry Charlamade and the guy we ared to practice
Club g Herbo is here. Now you talk about Meek
Mill changing your life, right, yeah, he was your inspiration, man,
break that down to what you see the meat that
made you think that you can do it.
Speaker 4 (09:18):
I've just got done listening to We're Gonna get this
money right now on my way here. Like Meek is
my favorite rapper for real, bro, it's my big brother.
And I was just with Meek last night. We just
did a song last we was in the studio last night,
I believe. But like I used to listen to me
and watch me when he was a battle rapper, but
when he really got rich and made this happen, it's
like all right, but that like it's different from me
(09:41):
watching like Wayne and whole Man, you know what I'm saying,
Like I couldn't like I could relate to it.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
But it's like.
Speaker 4 (09:50):
When I grew up and me, I've seen him the
rich already, Like I seen Meek turn rich, coming from
the streets and going through all this that he went
through and really like talking about it and preaching like
positivity and motivation. That made me feel like I just
want to be like that for real real, Like that
could really like help me grow into the artist that
(10:12):
I am today, for real real because like damn, like
it's Meek, Like it's not like he was an artist
and he was like far away, you feel what I'm saying,
Like I felt like I could grasp on to that
and become that, Like this is a real streak that
became the biggest in the world, Like he became the
biggest best rat and he's a rap guy.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Like I love rapping.
Speaker 4 (10:35):
I'm an mc so, I studied that first and foremost,
but just a blueprinter like and like he like.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
He gave you the real blueprint, like you get on,
you take care, you do what you supposed to do.
Speaker 4 (10:47):
You take care of your family, your mother like to
make me like I just used to have to just
get money to my mama, just like thinking about that
type of you know what I'm saying, Like I retire
my mom when I was sixteen years old, bro literally
and they put a lot of press showed me. I
told my mama stopped working when I was sixteen. She
never worked since, but take care of her, my aunties,
my whole family since I was sixteen.
Speaker 2 (11:08):
That's a lot of pressure, a lot of pressure.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
Now you're the meat meal for a lot of these
younger artists, So what do you show them to show
them that they can do it?
Speaker 2 (11:17):
What do you do different?
Speaker 1 (11:18):
So because you know, you got a lot of kids
watching it and they want.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
To be arrible for sure.
Speaker 4 (11:22):
Like for me, it's I just try to like what's
the word, like you gotta like show them like like
what meat did for real, like tangible.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
You just gotta show the like I like.
Speaker 4 (11:33):
The thing with me that I feel like make a
difference a lot is I let people see me in
a physical like you gotta see it like have conversations
like seeing this, believing you feel what I'm saying, Like
you know you could do this when you could actually
get in front of somebody like me. Growing up, I
never seen nobody that I looked up to, and I
wanted to be like in front of me talking to me.
(11:53):
You know what I'm saying, Like I just had to
have a man power, like I could do it. I'm
gonna do it, you knowel what I'm saying. And it
happened for me. And when I got a certain age
like nineteen twenty eight, like those ages when I started
traveling and having conversations with people that I looked up to,
But like fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, them years really matter whereas
like you know what I'm saying, I try to be
(12:15):
the person where I just go back and do certain
things and go touch the community, and you know what
I'm saying, tell them that they could really make it,
like this is nothing for real, like but like and
I ain't gonna say it's nothing like it's it's a task.
For sure, it's hard, but it's easy at the same time.
All you gotta do is wake up and strive to
(12:37):
go get it and want to do it and believe
that you could do it. You just got to have
a vision, you feel what I'm saying. And when I
go look at like these kids and be going to
talk and have conversations, like they got the same power
that I got, Like they really got something in them.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
They just don't think it's possible.
Speaker 4 (12:54):
This is really possible, like they when you wake up
and all you got is this four block radius and
your hood and that you're dealing with every day, you
think that's your life, but it's like it's so much
outside of that.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
All you gotta know is how to break that cycle.
Speaker 4 (13:08):
And you know what I'm saying, Like, that's that's the
thing with me, Like I feel like that's what make
a difference in why people like believe in me because
I try.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
I let him touch me, I let them, you know
what I'm saying, pauls Like, you know what I'm saying.
I go see the people. I'm thinking about something now.
Speaker 5 (13:24):
And you made me think about it when you said
you've been rapping since she was nineteen, because I can
remember like your first I can remember your first early
breakfast club interviews, right. But then it started getting me
thinking about all of these artists we've seen from Chicago
that have come through come through here the past fifteen years.
You talk about what's possible. Man, you are proof that's
surviving as possible. Chief keepers, proof that surviving is sure.
(13:47):
So so definitely, you know what I mean. People like
Dirk that's locked up, people like Bo that's no longer here,
plenty of artists you probably interview from Chicago.
Speaker 2 (13:54):
How does that feel feel? Great?
Speaker 5 (13:56):
Man?
Speaker 4 (13:57):
You know, and I'm gonna say this again, I'm gonna
shall make out real quick because he just told me
the other day, and this it feel different. It's a
different feeling than him saying. It's like he's like, man,
want you to chosen one. It's certain things that just
affect you differently, you know what I'm saying. And I
learned that from the streets, Like I didn't bump my
(14:17):
head so many times and did so much and been
arrested and fell off and came back or whatever the
case may be.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (14:24):
It's like when you do certain things, God just punish
you differently because you can't get away with that, you
know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
Like you would think you would see somebody else doing
it like, oh.
Speaker 4 (14:33):
He did it, and you can't do that because God
got a different path for you. And surviving in Chicago,
just making it out of the streets alone is a blessing.
Like it's literally like I'd be seeing some of my
homies and certain people that just like and I understand
that other people don't get it. Like it's certain people
where you just like you just like wash your hands
(14:55):
with everything. I know certain there was real menaces in
the streets that don't do nothing but just be at
home with their girl and their kids now because they
just want peace.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
Like, damn, I made it out there. I can't believe
I'm still alive.
Speaker 4 (15:08):
Like a lot of people never experience life to that
capacity where they're just grateful that they're alive, that they
still here, you knowe what I'm saying. And it's a
lot of people when it comes surviving, you gotta make
decisions and it got to be calculated, and it's a
lot of people that's just raised off survival.
Speaker 2 (15:26):
When you will do anything, it's a difference like when.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
You survive and you just raised off survival, Like I'm
trying to explain that with Like, it's certain people where
if you just like survival is your first instinct.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
You will do anything right.
Speaker 4 (15:41):
You would kill your closest friend, you a snitch, rob,
steal from your mama, your grandma, And you gotta understand this,
like it's just life. It's certain people who don't know
nothing else. They was raised off of survival. They mother
and father raised them off of survivals. So it's like
a lot of people don't understand that, you know what
(16:02):
I'm saying, It's just me being here today. I try to,
Like I think that's one of the reasons why, like
I probably got took advantage of so much because I
understand both sides of the fence, and I try to
get everybody the benefit of the doubt, you know what
I'm saying, Like I try to like think about putting
myself in other people's shoes before I make a decision,
(16:23):
you know what I'm saying. Like I always before I
do anything, I always think about the consequences, repercussions, everything.
So if I do something to anybody or do anything,
I thought about it so many times I'm comfortable with
having it play out, you know what I'm saying, And
like you, like it's only certain people that think like that,
especially in life and coming from Chicago, you got to
(16:45):
think about both sides of the fence. It's certain people
that think a lot, and it's certain people that don't
think at all. You feel me and like it's a
blessing to be here for sure. For sure, because I've
seen a lot. I experienced a lot. I've seen a
lot of death, and I just come from one of
the toughest neighborhoods in Chicago, like one of the most
poverty struck in neighborhoods where it's like I was a
(17:06):
kid and people used to like a lady walked out.
I think I said this before on a breakfast club
interview when I was when I was in Shorty, Like
a lady walked up on me. I'm waiting on my mom.
She coming from the launder. Mail lady walked up on me,
like you got some sea. I'm like mm, She like what.
Speaker 2 (17:22):
I'm like what. She's like, you got some ce? She
asks for crack.
Speaker 4 (17:25):
I'm like nine years old, I'm like nineteen, wait on
my mama to come in the house, like you got
some See.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
I'm like what.
Speaker 4 (17:33):
Yeah, she asked me if I had cracked, literally a
kid three in the morning I'm outside because that's now
your selling crack for real, for real, Like when.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
Did you get something? That's the statute of limitations with
this call like some crack. It's a statute of limitations,
for sure. We got more with g Herbo when we
come back. It's the Breakfast Club morning. If this world
(18:02):
was my, Hey Roman, normal.
Speaker 3 (18:04):
Seven bay drop it like it's hot. If this world
was a mine, not taking dreams and making the most
a fly? If this world was mine, not taking in
amazing in front of God and should do something to
that light Hit them strictly with that five fi five
five five five fine five, Hey Roman normal, seven bay
(18:26):
drop it like it's hot. If this world was a mine,
not taking dreams and made the most apply. If this
world was mine, not taking in an amazing in front
of God and should do something to that light hit
them strictly with the five.
Speaker 2 (18:38):
It's a video dance.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
Let a watch you a fan?
Speaker 2 (18:41):
He a fly, It's just one of Kumbaya. Nah, it's
swell count peas always girl, God.
Speaker 1 (18:51):
Warning, everybody's the DJ Envy just Hilarie Charlamagne the God.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
We are the Breakfast Club.
Speaker 5 (18:56):
We're still kicking it with g Herbal that therapeutic was
just album in regard to your grieving process, because I
hear you mentioned your brother a lot, especially on Give
It All.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
How did that help?
Speaker 4 (19:07):
I ain't gonna lie that I've been dealing with del
since I was a kid, bro Like I lost I
started losing friends when I was like fourteen years old,
you know, Like, and I'm talking about that, I'm touching
on that my and my hour, my project. But you
gotta really like realize I'm thirty years old. I've been
losing people I love for fifteen years and still managing
(19:30):
to wake up and make it happen and beg herbo
and take pictures and smile for the fans, Like I
really didn't lost some of my best friends and had
to go do a show that same day, you.
Speaker 2 (19:42):
Know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (19:43):
Like my homie cap did twenty fifteen, I had to
perform in front of ten thousand people.
Speaker 2 (19:47):
I just had to find it emmy. A lot of
people can't do that.
Speaker 4 (19:50):
A lot of people like now I just lost my
homie fish going to go spind like I want to
go do the show. So it's like I feel like
I'm really destined for this shows my own destiny. I
chose my own path, and I'm saying that, like for
me the experience all of that death and I feel
like I was numb to it. When my little brother died,
it changed my life. That was some of the worst
(20:12):
pain that I ever felt in my life ever, Like
I could never I never could fathom, like and I'm
a street Like when I wake out, when I walk
out the house, I feel like I'm gonna die, Like
you know, like I really feel like that, and that's
what get me home. You feel what I'm saying, like
every step, every move that I take is calculated. And
(20:33):
I never felt like he was gonna die, you know
what I'm saying. Like, no, boys, I never ever think
like him. Hell No, I just I never thought he
was going to die. Every day I wake out, wake up,
I really feel like I'm gonna die. I feel like
somebody would do something to me. And that's just the
life I live.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
And that's just you still feel like that because I
remember the last time you said you feel like that,
you said you would go into therapy to help you
get and it helped me with.
Speaker 2 (20:56):
It helped me with it.
Speaker 4 (20:57):
But like, nah, hell no, and I'm glad that even
going through therapy and like growing and healing the way
that I've healed in my life, I'm kind of glad
that I never lost that edge for real, because that's
how I protect myself, That's how I protect my children,
That's how I make sure I get back home. You feel,
I'm saying, like, I'm not out here thucking. I ain't
(21:18):
wild and I ain't doing no crazy. Some days I
leave the house and it just be just me by myself,
no security, nothing, But I'm still on point. I'm still
watching my back, I'm still aware of my surroundings, you
feel I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
So it's like, I'm glad that I never lost that
edge for real, for real.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
And when like going back to what you know, what
I'm saying, what you said, Charla Mane, Like when my
little brother died, I lost myself, Like I became an alcoholic,
like a badass alcoholic. I never used to drink bro
I used to drink a fifth of liquor every single day,
just like every day by myself. Like, and my girl
was pregnant when he died, you feel me like, and
(21:57):
I was like I was trying to like be that
week around her you feel me? Because she she know
I didn't been through like she didn't been around me,
and I hadn't lost homies, you know what I'm saying. Like,
and she used to like say, like snap out of it,
like you feel me, Like she used to like say it,
but it's like I can't.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
It was just so hard for me.
Speaker 4 (22:16):
I really couldn't for real, Like I used to have
to leave the house just to go cry, like set
of God, like just go get in the con just
cry for hour straight because I didn't want to do
that in front of her. And I felt like I
should have. I should have, I should have.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
But I was like I don't know. I just And
when she said snap out of it, what does she mean?
Speaker 4 (22:35):
Like not snap out of the grief, snap out of
the healing, snap out of the crashing out like drinking,
drinking every day and wanting to go to the club
and just feel something because I really can't feel nothing,
you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
Like that was like that's what she used to tell
me to snap out of and it was like it
was hard. Man, I ain't gonna lie.
Speaker 5 (22:53):
I want to go back to one thing you said
in regards to how you react to death, because you know,
staying busy as a response to trauma, right, and we
saw that in real time, if you don't mind me
bringing it up, Like like people don't know to day
your father passed, God blessed it. I came here, you
was scheduled to do a breakfast club interview. You came
in the studio and still wanted to do it, like
(23:14):
bro go home, like what And I love you forever
for that because I really was here to do that.
Speaker 4 (23:21):
And it's like that's the thing, like I'm so used
to death and used to just like I didn't even
process it for real, like I came here because it's
like I really was in my head trying to forget
that my dad is dead. But I gotta like understand it.
I gotta know, like, yeah, my pop's just that today.
I need to process that. Like and you had just
got the news while you was in the on the way, Yeah,
(23:44):
my dad was in the hospital. I knew he was
sick and I found out he died, and I just
came here.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
I don't know. I just like I don't even like
what are you doing? Like we're not doing h No.
He told me like bro. Just go home, like just
leave bro for real. For the rest of that day,
Like what did you do? Did you reflect on it?
Were you afraid to even? I was afraid.
Speaker 4 (24:07):
I was afraid because like when you lose a parent,
that's different, real real my dad, like I didn't. I
didn't have an absent father, like my father been living
with me my entire life, like my mother and my
dad been together forty years for real, for real, like
and I think I was just trying to like not
feel it, like not processing, like you.
Speaker 2 (24:27):
Know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4 (24:28):
I was just like, all right, ben, let me just
do it, and like that's the that's the problem, Like
that's the thing, Like you feel like, all right, let
me just do it and push through this, and this
is my job, this is my life. Like you got
to put that to the side. Sometimes when you're going
through things like that, you feel what I'm saying. And
the rest of that day for me was really just
like I was scared, Like I ain't want to call
my mama. I didn't want to talk to my sister.
(24:48):
It took me so long, and just asked my sister,
are you okay?
Speaker 2 (24:51):
How you doing? It was super hard? You were okay.
Speaker 4 (24:54):
Yeah, Like I was scared to like have them conversations
with her, like how you feeling?
Speaker 2 (24:59):
You know what I'm saying?
Speaker 4 (25:00):
My mom like I keep my mom close to me,
and my mom like this you feel me and I
know it, like I could see it. I know she
was not okay, And I used to avoid them conversations,
you know what I'm saying, Like she would bring stuff
up and like send me pictures and all that.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
It was it was like I didn't have been in therapy.
Speaker 4 (25:19):
I'm a person that's not like shy from my emotions,
like I'm intune my emotions all of that. But just
like it was hard because like for me, just I
just thought he hit more time, Like I just wanted
him to be here. So I wasn't trying to like
live in reality because I'm still I was still grieving
my little brother, you feel what I'm saying. So when
that happened, it was just like I didn't want to
(25:40):
believe that my dad was dead because I'll be on
the road sometimes I go eight months without seeing my pops.
So it's like you feel me, like eight nine months
without seeing them at all. Sometimes I go months without
talking to him. So I was trying to like tap
into that, like you feel me, like, let me just
get that mentality like he like he here, but you
know what I'm saying, but he my my pop's really
(26:02):
Like that's crazy. I think about that every day, like
man really died on me, and it's crazy. Like I
pray every day, like I pray so much because my pops,
my last conversation with him. My dad died the day
after his birthday, like my birthday October eighth, my dad
birthday October sixteenth. He died on seventeen and my last
conversation with him, I called him. I said every birthday.
(26:24):
I said, man, you're on your way. Boy, you're getting old.
You're getting old?
Speaker 2 (26:28):
What? And he died?
Speaker 4 (26:29):
Like that was the last thing I said to my pops,
Like boy, you on your way. Boy, you about to
be seventy. You know what I'm saying, Like you getting old?
Stop getting old?
Speaker 2 (26:40):
A dream like you said that I was on my way. Yeah,
I hope. So I want him to now you haven't check.
I want him to. I hope he.
Speaker 4 (26:48):
I hope he's telling me that the night like that
be a lot of comfort for real, for real, Like.
Speaker 5 (26:52):
Is it hard to write about. I mean, like I said,
you right about your brother now? Yeah, but brother would
have three years ago five is so is it hard?
It's hard to put that on paper right now.
Speaker 4 (27:03):
And in a way like only like I'll just like
for sure, like in a way I just rap about
like my pop's passing.
Speaker 2 (27:10):
I never like I didn't got all the way, like
I didn't.
Speaker 4 (27:13):
Made songs like paying how much to my brother, like
give it all that song it's about my brother, and
made songs just talking about how I felt that day,
Like I didn't made multiple songs about my brother died,
like I ain't did that for my pop.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
Shit all I said on Wax for Real is just
like my dad did. Like I never spoke about the
emotions how I felt, none of that.
Speaker 4 (27:33):
So yeah, it is definitely tough because I don't know
I feel like mentally or just where I met in life,
like I ain't been able to tap into that pain.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
We want to get into something with that.
Speaker 1 (27:45):
But what you want to hear that? Man, Let's play
give it out. It's one of my favorite songs, and
we appreciate you for joining us. Brother pick up her
at album this week. See Her gets the breakfast, talk about.
Speaker 2 (28:01):
I give it off, no for the money. In the
same give it off the money.
Speaker 4 (28:07):
Take me back in two thousand and five when I
ain't even wrapped, falling in the alley. It's against pockets flat.
But we was happy and my head was snappy.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
Riding on the bus. Ain't had no traffic.
Speaker 4 (28:17):
It was just seeing you.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
Shoty. Now you're going with them, going through shouting you
pick up whatever you.
Speaker 4 (28:21):
Call, passed the bill, but we had too soft trying
to catch the old that a new party brought. Wasn't
that for you? I'm side now My drugs wait too
often because I've seen you in a comfort and I
should have been there with you because I would have
been tossed. And can't never forget that. They remember they
all lost their whole game. Got a real pint because
we've been neling. The crosses almost made us pump. I'm
already pumped up.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
Getting your mold.
Speaker 4 (28:43):
It's an ice out one fifty parm I gottam floss up.
Make it back to high school. Yeah, we had it hard,
but we were soft up. Living fast. You with the
passenger and all was the track. Honker had a whole
I was getting mad at us every bitch walking. I
was blowing my gun at fifteenth and they won't be.
They just tossed and hit the rules when those when
sixteen had them all with we with the always top
from jet to jet. That's like though, finally gonna check
(29:03):
the check like a psycho. Tipsy can't to wipe me
a bodio. We ran trains and holds in Ohio. That's
my brain that only God know. You told me stuff
only I know, and you CHURCHI grows to ma bro
shut off. Fine, so that's my final Who here that
and became a savage?
Speaker 2 (29:15):
Let us block go. That's on rock though happy we
ever felt it.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
Real pain make you turn selfish when it's sane because
you couldn't help it. Now your brain thinking about the
old age that this should never be the same because
I lost my brother to that game. All I see
is flames. I'm a fire burning in my eyes
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