Coworker Probs On A Monday

It's never good when you have to deal with a bad coworker on a Monday and we're talking red flags that you stayed in a relationship through. 

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Sady Show, Good Morning.

Speaker 2 (00:03):
Bustin's number one for hip hop jam in ninety four
or five.

Speaker 3 (00:10):
Hi, everybody, good morning. It's just funny that this is
a sensitive subject for some. I don't to each to
their own. Really, at the end of the day, can
we as outsiders looking in be like, oh, that's weird,
that's interesting. Sure. My daughter is going to be one

(00:33):
and a half next month. I still breastfeeder. I don't
pump anymore. She eats full on breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
She drinks cow's milk canal. But when I'm home, like
if I am there, she still likes to nurse. I
am still supplying milk, and milk is still happening, and

(00:54):
she's a milk monster. Like a milk monster. I had
planned on jan one, kind of starting to wean her.
If if you want to see what I'm physically talking
about at Ashley Feldman Twe's on the Ashley like I
will start just be having a random conversation with somebody.

Speaker 4 (01:10):
She doesn't care who's in the room.

Speaker 3 (01:12):
She's ripped down my sweat or she gets frustrated when
I tell her no. It's like again, she's her nutrition
comes from breakfast, lunch, dinner. That's where she gets her nutrition.
But this is something that she does. On top of that,
I feel like I'm trying to like, I don't I
don't owe this to anybody, but I'm just saying, like
this works for us in our home. I breastfed Lela

(01:33):
all the way till I think sixteen or seventeen months
as well.

Speaker 5 (01:36):
But breastfeeding from like the get go is always like
a diversive topic because some people think you should be breasfeeding,
some people don't actually do it.

Speaker 6 (01:44):
It's a whole thing.

Speaker 3 (01:45):
And listen, I am so proud of myself that I
breastfed both kids. Neither one of them ever had a
sip of formula. I breastfed and I'm still breastfeeding. But
I also if I wasn't able to do it when
the time came, that's okay too. Like I wouldn't be
able to look at a kid and be like, oh,
breastfed baby, Like that's not the way the world works.
I'm so proud of my body that I was able

(02:06):
to do it. And it's a full time commitment. It's
a full time job. So for that part, I'm proud,
but I am I don't know how I am gonna
start getting this this little thing off the boob because
she's obsessed, like and it's it's a real conversation in
our house where we're like I might have to go
away for a weekend, like just like disappear because she's
she's a milk monsters. There's like signs when you know

(02:29):
that they basically run you. And one of the signs
is when they're breastfeeding on the one boob, but they
like twiddle with the other nipple. And she knows she
twiddles like she like she like basically looks at me
like like she twiddles.

Speaker 4 (02:41):
I don't even know if that's a word, but you.

Speaker 3 (02:42):
Get what I'm Satand but again, she's one and a half.
She's still a baby, Like she's one and a half
years old.

Speaker 4 (02:49):
Next month.

Speaker 3 (02:50):
We're having this conversation because Coco, who's married to Iced Tea,
went viral for saying that she breastfed her kid until
she was six.

Speaker 7 (03:01):
Are you still breastfeeding, Chanelle or did you guys finally
wean off or is that something that you guys still do.

Speaker 8 (03:06):
So the whole concept of the breastleeding thing, it wasn't
like I was feeding her.

Speaker 9 (03:12):
Because she needed a meal.

Speaker 8 (03:14):
Right, she was able to eat you know by a year,
you know, full like solids. It was more of a
bonding experience and the more of like, okay, i'll give
you the milk. But it was more like she wanted
to be around me. So I was like, I'm going
to let her stop when she wants to stop. She's
not going to be sixteen on my boom, right, She's

(03:36):
going to eventually figure out, Okay, this is kind of
strange or weird and stuff.

Speaker 4 (03:40):
And that happened around six.

Speaker 8 (03:43):
So that was about six, which was still extremely a
long amount of time apparently. But in Europe they're doing
until seven right there.

Speaker 3 (03:49):
It's nothing for them.

Speaker 8 (03:50):
I mean, Americans think that's weird.

Speaker 3 (03:55):
Seven year old like a whole. It actually has gotten
to a point now where I can like be sitting
on like the couch and she can kind of like
walk over and.

Speaker 5 (04:06):
Like it six is listen, My youngest is eight and
two years ago again, he was walking talking first grade.

Speaker 6 (04:14):
And all that like that is very very weird. And
I just think, like I don't.

Speaker 5 (04:18):
Care if some what somebody does, how mother's parent and
all that stuff. I'm a man, so I don't have
any opinion on even stuff like this, but I will say,
when you see an older kid breastfeeding, it is definitely weird.
Like they put it in movies as a joke, as
a comedy.

Speaker 4 (04:33):
Where are you at with Daisy's age?

Speaker 3 (04:34):
Like, do you find that?

Speaker 6 (04:35):
It's to me, it's what you want.

Speaker 4 (04:37):
But if you do, you think it's still weird.

Speaker 5 (04:39):
That it's fine, it's not a problem. No, she's still
really young, so no, but she was.

Speaker 4 (04:43):
What's your age cut off? Like where you're like, Okay,
that is weird.

Speaker 6 (04:45):
Okay, I think kindergarten is too old.

Speaker 3 (04:48):
That's my opinion. Yeah, I listen, I'm not fighting, I'm asking.
I'm not at six.

Speaker 6 (04:53):
They're getting on the bus to go to school. Yeah,
that's too old in my opinion.

Speaker 3 (04:57):
Six one seven nine three one one nine four five
six one seven nine three one one nine four five.
Sometimes breastfeedings moms get really defensive. I'm a breastfeeding mom,
so saying, but I think what people don't talk about
a lot in the in the breastfeeding world is stopping
is really emotional. So I think people push that because

(05:20):
you do, you have this bond with them, You're the
one who you know puts them down and stuff, and
there is this like emotional connection to it. She's not
wrong when she says that. And I really struggled with
Leila because it is just like chip in your brain
where it's like, Okay, they're not a baby anymore, so
we're down with this and we have to stop this.
But they're now wait a second, I'm you know you
missed the baby times and you're just nestled in your
in your bosom.

Speaker 5 (05:40):
Yeah, I see what you're setting up. You're setting up
that lady's gonna be like ten on the boom and that's.

Speaker 3 (05:44):
Just like da I'm sorry.

Speaker 4 (05:47):
Still yet.

Speaker 3 (05:51):
Six is crazy? Six one seven nine three one one
nine four five, but one and a half stop high
everybody morning. It's Ashley in the gym in morning show.
It's funny. I I have gotten people who have written
me and been nasty to me about the fact that

(06:12):
I'm still breastfeeding Daisy. First off, I want to write
back what I can't say it, but I want to
go off because it's like, first off, who comments on
things like that? I don't know, But Daisy's not even
a year and a half old, will be a year
and a half next month. This is the exact same
timeline I was on with Layla. The difference is Layla

(06:33):
was ready to be weaned off this milk monster at home.
She's yes, I it's not gonna be prey and my
goal was jan one, but I don't even know. Weaning
is hard, especially when you have a milk monster. But
weaning is hard emotionally because it does it triggers something
in you that you know they're not a baby anymore
and those moments are going away. And I've been fortunate enough.
I've breasted both of them, and I love doing it.

(06:56):
I can't talk more highly of doing it. If you're
someone who's trying to decide, you don't know fits for
you or not. I loved it so much, full time
job crazy, Like remember the days when I was pumping
in here and trying. I hate pumping. Pumping can go
to hell, but I do love the actual act of it.
I'm not doing it till she's so soft.

Speaker 4 (07:12):
No, I'm not doing it until she's six.

Speaker 3 (07:16):
Cocoa iced teas wife was like, oh yeah, breast fatter until.

Speaker 4 (07:18):
She was six.

Speaker 3 (07:19):
Like what Maureene is in Londonderry, Hi Maureene, good morning, Hi.

Speaker 10 (07:25):
I see good morning.

Speaker 3 (07:27):
This is hilarious because I will say once they hit one,
they start to get acrobatic. When they breastfeed and they
do wild things. It becomes like it's like a workout.
So you actually you actually stopped around a year.

Speaker 11 (07:40):
And why I stopped you around a year because my
work schedule at the time was in a llowying for
me to pump as much.

Speaker 12 (07:49):
As I needed to, okay, And when I leaned her
at first it was hard, but she was fine with it.
But then when I would be in things like bathing
suits or low cut top, I learned that I would
have to be very careful because she'd retrite it, just
pull them out.

Speaker 11 (08:06):
Oh, it didn't matter where we were.

Speaker 12 (08:09):
And I was telling Santi it happened in a smoothie shop.

Speaker 10 (08:14):
It was the most embarrassing one.

Speaker 12 (08:16):
I was top and she pulled it out in a
smoothie line. I just tucked it back in and ran out.

Speaker 3 (08:25):
You know, it doesn't And Maureen, I feel this so
much because it doesn't matter what I'm in. I could
be in twelve sweatshirts and a jacket and she's trying
to stick her whole head up my shirt. So I
get it, and thank you so much for the call,
because it is true. They start to get they get
they wizen up, and they're like, okay, well now I'm
gonna have to get in there, and how am I
going to figure it out? I mean sometimes she'll be

(08:46):
breastfeeding and her feet will be at my face. Think
about that, like she's in crazy positions because.

Speaker 4 (08:50):
She's fair now, Cynthia is in Lynn.

Speaker 3 (08:54):
Cynthia also breastsped for close to two years, which is
probably what will end up happening for me. But you know,
I was trying to explain to everybody, it's not just
like one day you wake up and you're like, okay,
we're done here.

Speaker 4 (09:05):
It's it's sad for us too.

Speaker 3 (09:08):
Good morning, good morning.

Speaker 11 (09:10):
Hi. Yeah, so I wanted to call and just say
I can totally relate. I breastfed my first one for
a year, my second one for a year, and then
my third one was two years and two months.

Speaker 13 (09:23):
Damn.

Speaker 11 (09:25):
I think it was a while. But I think at
the third one, I'm like, you know what, it doesn't
change anything in my daily life to keep breastfeeding her
since she was still liking it and I'm like, you know,
eventually I wean her because I didn't want her to
get too attached. But I think a year and a
half for you, like absolutely still a baby appropriate.

Speaker 3 (09:48):
Like yeah, nothing's like I'm not out here having a
conversation of like okay, I'm putting her on a bus
and I'm giving her one last teach before she leaves.
Like these people are crazy. They're writing me like these
messages as if I'm discussed saying, wait, what what did it?
Looks so weird, But Cynthia, thank you for the call.

Speaker 5 (10:04):
It's not six Yeah, Like I think if like the
baby can ask for it, then it's probably then it's
too old.

Speaker 3 (10:11):
Well listen, I'm trying to teach her words, like she
can say things yeah.

Speaker 5 (10:14):
Okay sorry if they can ask it in a sentence,
and then maybe like I want some milk to school, that's.

Speaker 3 (10:22):
Too old okay, Yeah, she's doing that. Goodbye and morning show.

Speaker 14 (10:27):
Good morning.

Speaker 2 (10:28):
Bostin's number one for hip hop jam in ninety four
or five.

Speaker 4 (10:34):
Hi, everybody, good morning. Oh big stretch, stretching.

Speaker 3 (10:40):
The weekend just it did comes and it goes and
it's always quick, and I know I miss things. I
miss you over the weekend, So tell me everything. What
did I miss? How are you doing? We're talking about
whatever you want? Six one seven, nine, three one one
nine four five. Cindy is in Boston. Cindy is sin
I'm gonna be honest with you. Nineteen, but Santi says,

(11:02):
you sound.

Speaker 4 (11:03):
Out a day over eleven. Let's test this out.

Speaker 3 (11:05):
Say Hi, I'm Cindy from Boston.

Speaker 10 (11:08):
Hi, I'm Sinddy from Boston.

Speaker 6 (11:10):
Okay, yeah, she aged it up a bit.

Speaker 3 (11:12):
Now she's thirteen, Cindy, So we're going through it a
little bit with our boyfriend.

Speaker 4 (11:17):
But you are nineteen. How old is your boyfriend?

Speaker 10 (11:20):
He's twenty one?

Speaker 4 (11:21):
Okay, nineteen and a twenty one year old's boyfriend. What happened?

Speaker 3 (11:24):
What's going on?

Speaker 10 (11:25):
So I went on a vacation with my friend this
week and I went to New York and she didn't
want me to go because over the summer he wanted
to go to Puerto Rico. And I was like, no,
you're not going to Puerto Rico because you're gonna go
to clubs and parties and that's crazy. And so then
I went to New York. But I didn't do any
of that stuff, like I went to like Canal Street,
like you know what I mean, Times Square, regular things.

(11:47):
And now he's not texting me, and he's like, Okay,
now I'm gonna go on a vacation too, and you
can't tell.

Speaker 9 (11:51):
Me what to do.

Speaker 4 (11:53):
I'm you know who side I'm on. Unfortunately his.

Speaker 3 (11:57):
First off, you can't tell a twenty one year old
man he can't go on a trip. And then you
go on a trip yourself, Like that's like, we have
to take a step back. I realize what you're saying
that you didn't do all those things. But you have
to trust him. Okay, you have to trust him enough
to go on those trips and say he does go
to a club, trust him enough to dance around and
go home and not go home with another female.

Speaker 13 (12:18):
You know what I mean.

Speaker 10 (12:19):
Yep, but he would never let me go to a club.
But so he can go, but I can't go.

Speaker 3 (12:25):
Well, first off, can I tell you? Can I tell
you the real truth? This is not this is not
a healthy relationship. Like you guys are young, but this
tip for tat I'm not going.

Speaker 4 (12:35):
You're not going. You can't go.

Speaker 3 (12:36):
I can't go. That's not healthy. That's you guys are
young again, but that this is a really tough foundation
for any sort of relationship.

Speaker 4 (12:45):
It's not going to last.

Speaker 10 (12:48):
So what should I do? Well, I'm sure my text
or anything.

Speaker 3 (12:55):
I know, and I'm sure that's probably that's probably killing you.
And I'm sorry for that because I know that hurts
because he's probably your you know, that's your best friend,
that's your boyfriend, that's all of these things. But Son,
you got to understand what I'm trying to say. Listen,
I'm thirty nine years old. I'm an old lady, and
I've been through many relationships in my time. If you

(13:18):
are feeling like this is the way all relationships are
supposed to be, where he tells you what to do
and you tell him what to do, and nobody has
any fun and they don't do anything other than with
each other. Like, that's not the basis, that's not the
grounds for a healthy, strong relationship.

Speaker 4 (13:34):
Unfortunately. Yeah, I don't want to tell.

Speaker 3 (13:39):
You, like, don't be with him, you know, but I
do think you guys, my first advice would be to
have a sit down conversation where you guys kind of
iron out these these things. I don't know, why do
you guys have no trust in each other. Why doesn't
he want you to go into clubs? Why can't he
go out to clubs? And not specifically clubs, I mean
even trips, like where where did this come from?

Speaker 4 (13:59):
Was there?

Speaker 10 (14:01):
So he's always been like very like when we before
we started dating, he would always be like like we'd
be like in the like whatever talking stage, and he
would be like going out to clubs and stuff, and
he'd be like, Okay, well technically can go, but because
I'm single. But he would act like we were dating
and saying he was going to ask me out, but
he's st clubs and texting other girls. And then he
started he asked me out, so that we started dating,

(14:23):
and like obviously he was being loyal, but it's like
he always thinks that I want to be like doing
something else, even though he's the one that always wants
to go to clubs, goes out and all the stuff,
and I don't do that. Yeah, so it's like he
does it, but he thinks I want to do it.

Speaker 3 (14:39):
Yeah I'm I'm I have him having an internal battle
here because my, my, the girl and me wants to
tell you, this is not the man for you.

Speaker 4 (14:48):
This is what he's he's.

Speaker 3 (14:51):
Manipulating you, right, He's telling you like, Okay, we're together now,
so I'm not talking to their girls, I'm not texting
their girls.

Speaker 4 (14:57):
You can't go to the club.

Speaker 3 (14:58):
I can go to the club whilst probably doing that
stuff or doing something else shady on the side.

Speaker 4 (15:03):
That's what I want to tell you to do.

Speaker 3 (15:05):
But that's a girl, you mean. But I also know
that that's probably you're nineteen years old. This will feel
like the end of the world for you if you
guys break up.

Speaker 10 (15:13):
Yeah, And he also says like he doesn't go to
the club, but he was like, oh, but I can
go to clubs because I'm not going to approach girls.
But guys are going to approach you. So you can't
go because the guys are going to approach you.

Speaker 3 (15:25):
So he's keeping you on lock and key while he's
able to do what he wants. I hate that, I
said in the beginning, because I didn't really get a
background that I stand with him. Just what I don't
stand for is anybody telling you what you ken and
can't do. There can be a discussion, Hey, you went
to New York. You went to the club that hurt
my feelings. And then you guys can have a discussion

(15:45):
as to why you can go to the club, hang
out with your girlfriends, and go home. But these are
all conversations that I feel like come with age and maturity,
and I just don't think you guys are there yet.
You know, you're nineteen, he's twenty one. I just I
don't know.

Speaker 4 (16:01):
I think you should be single.

Speaker 3 (16:03):
I think you should live it up and be nineteen
and go to New York City and not worry about
having to come home to a boyfriend who's going to
ignore you because you went to see a Christmas tree
you know.

Speaker 11 (16:13):
Yeah.

Speaker 10 (16:14):
Yeah, And like I told him, like, oh, like, oh,
I know, you said you don't agree with like saying
no to like the club. Like I told him that, like,
oh yeah, you could go to Portiso, but don't go
to the club. And he was like, okay, no, So
then he just canceled the whole trip. And then now
that I'm going to go to New York, but then
I wasn't going to do that. He still wasn't okay
with it because he didn't get to go, you know
what I mean.

Speaker 3 (16:32):
And you told him he can go to Puerto Rico
and not go to clubs because he told he's been
telling you you can't go to clubs, right, It was
kind of.

Speaker 10 (16:37):
Like a yeah, and then he was like and then
he was like, but what else would I do there?
Like that was his plan?

Speaker 3 (16:43):
Yeah, I mean he's twenty one years old, go away.

Speaker 6 (16:45):
Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 4 (16:46):
Yeah, but he's.

Speaker 6 (16:46):
Twenty one, he's a twenty one year olds.

Speaker 4 (16:48):
That is what he wants to do.

Speaker 3 (16:50):
And you're nineteen and you go to New York and
you know, you get to go around and do what
you want to. I don't know. I feel bad because
part of me feels like you're like my daughter that
I'm talking to, and I know that when in fact,
you guys do break up, it's gonna be really really
hard for you.

Speaker 4 (17:05):
But I also, I mean this as respectfully and.

Speaker 3 (17:09):
With all the love in the possible world, like this
isn't gonna be the guy that you're gonna end up with.
You're not going to marry this guy. You're not.

Speaker 13 (17:16):
You don't think so, because no, because you're gonna find
a guy who who trusts you and you trust him,
and you guys go on trips and everything's fine because
you love each other and you check in and you
have trust you're gonna find that.

Speaker 4 (17:29):
But you have you have so much life to live.
Who wants to be stuck.

Speaker 3 (17:34):
With a guy who tells you what you can and
can't do and you telling him that that's not fun?

Speaker 10 (17:40):
Yeah No, it's like it's like draining because it's like, oh,
like I said him a text, he's not going to
respond and he turned off his location everything when I
was there.

Speaker 3 (17:48):
Yeah, dude, like, honey, this is this is I think
you need to take a step back, really reevaluate and
and just realize what you I mean. I'm sure your
friends are telling you what I'm telling you, right, they can't.

Speaker 10 (17:59):
Yeah, yeah they are. Yeah, yeah, they're the same thing.

Speaker 3 (18:03):
Yeah, trust me, trust me when I tell you he
isn't the one. And when when eventually, in years and
years to come, you do find the one, you're going
to be like, look back at your old self, what
was I thinking? But but again all a right of passage, passage.
I have had so many relationship I looked back in
and being like I want to slap myself, my old
self in that you're gonna get there. But I genuinely

(18:24):
feel like he isn't the one for you. Regardless about
how hard the breakup will be. This is this is
this is not good. This is not a good relationship. Okay,
stay strong. Yeah, and you call us back if you
need us.

Speaker 10 (18:37):
Yeah, I'll call back to like if I have any
updates or anything.

Speaker 3 (18:40):
All right, then god speed.

Speaker 10 (18:42):
Okay, thank you, we love you.

Speaker 3 (18:45):
I just I feel that I don't I don't want
to break I don't want to be the one to
be like do it break up? But come, what are
we doing?

Speaker 9 (18:50):
No?

Speaker 5 (18:51):
But I will say at that age, I wish I
had someone like you to tell me that I was
in a bad relationship because I was. I in the
same experience like that, Like you go out and then
there was tip for tat and there was jealousy in
all this stuff and it wasn't healthy.

Speaker 4 (19:02):
Yeah, you got a nineteen year old and a twenty
one year old too.

Speaker 3 (19:05):
Like I said, I mean, breakups are hard even when
you're no matter what age you are, right, but at
nineteen you feel like you're going to literally die.

Speaker 6 (19:12):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (19:13):
I was nineteen when you broke up with me, and
I was like, well it right?

Speaker 3 (19:19):
Six one seven nine three one a one nine four
five six one seven nine three one a one nine
four five.

Speaker 4 (19:25):
We're talking about whatever you want to the checking morning.

Speaker 3 (19:27):
Hi everybody, good morning, It's Ashley and the jam In
Morning Show.

Speaker 4 (19:30):
We're checking in on you. What's up? What's going on?

Speaker 3 (19:32):
Sixty one seven nine three one one nine four five
if you want to be a part of it. Jamie
also looking for some advice in his relationship.

Speaker 4 (19:42):
Hi, jam good morning, Good morning. You know what's wild.

Speaker 3 (19:46):
Here's why I feel like you've completely called the right place.
Your first thing that you'll told Santy is that you're
a gambler, and I come I come from a family
of them. Like literally, you know, my dad is a
Cleveland Browns fan, also a degenerate, and he bets the
Browns every single weekend. So essentially he takes money and

(20:08):
he puts it right on in the toilet and he
flushes it down every weekend. They got problems, they have demons.
So let's let let us help you. You're a gambler
and your girlfriend is not, and she's really good at
saving money. Yes, and this is now creating some conflict.

Speaker 15 (20:30):
Yeah, so it's it's not I would to say it's
like big conflict. It's just like a disagreement we have
so I like to gamble all sorts of ways. I
like to go to the casino. I like to have
sports bet. Recently, I've been sports betting a lot. I
try not to do too much like big of bets.
I try to bet like twenty dollars, thirty dollars stuff

(20:53):
like that. You know, Okay, I pay all the right,
you know, I do my part.

Speaker 16 (20:59):
So I I think I.

Speaker 15 (21:00):
Should be able to gamble my extra money, you know
what I'm saying. But she believes that I should be
saving my extra money for eventually like a house. And
also I agree, I understand, but I feel that just
right now, I just have the money to spend. You
know what I'm saying, Just twenty dollars year, thirty dollars there, Yeah.

Speaker 3 (21:21):
I see. I can see both sides to this, especially
if bills aren't getting missed, because like we're like what
I'm the gambling in my life, Like bills were missed,
bookies were knocking on doors, like we've had it all
types of ways.

Speaker 4 (21:38):
Here's what I think is a good suggestion.

Speaker 3 (21:40):
Because and I actually can speak to this because my
brother and his girlfriend just went through this. My brother
also loves to gamble. His girlfriend also doesn't believe in
it and feels like he should be saving his money,
so they came up with an amount. She was like,
this is kind of what I see fit, this is
what I kind of think is reasonable, and he actually

(22:00):
adheres to that and sticks to it, and it kind
of was like the best of both worlds.

Speaker 4 (22:04):
She felt like, Okay, whatever the number is.

Speaker 3 (22:07):
Insert my brother bets a lot more than twenty dollars, Jamie,
that's really not that crazy in the gambling world. My
brother's minimum bet would probably be one hundred bucks on
the lower end. So they came up with an amount.
He's a huge Ohio State Buckeyes fan. He loves the UFC.
She kind of knows he's going to bet on those
type of events, but she feels comfortable with the amount.

(22:27):
He still kind of gets to gamble, and it felt
like it was a joint decision. So maybe kind of
approach it that way. Start with that conversation so she
feels like she's a part of it.

Speaker 16 (22:40):
I'm sorry, what was that question.

Speaker 4 (22:42):
No, it wasn't a question.

Speaker 3 (22:43):
It's just like, maybe start there, have that conversation, ask
her what the number is that she would feel comfortable with.

Speaker 15 (22:50):
Yeah, So we actually were having a conversation earlier today
and I was telling her like, maybe like one hundred
bucks a week, you know, twenty five twenty dollars a
day maybe, you know, just something like, I mean, I
have a full time job at work. I make good money,
so it's like one hundred dollars a week is not
really hurt in the pockets. But she sees it like
one hundred dollars we could have saved.

Speaker 3 (23:11):
Yeah, and listen, she's right unless you hit and then
you know what about that when you hit bad?

Speaker 15 (23:16):
I mean, I just I mean, just this past Friday,
I turned fifty dollars into thirty six hundred dollars, So
I mean it's like, can you complain?

Speaker 3 (23:24):
So when you take that thirty six hundred though, are
you rolling it back in? Is the question?

Speaker 15 (23:28):
Or are you taking Like no, I'm taking the thirty
six hundred, I'm paying my rent for the month and
then whatever's there left over. I mean, you know, just
at that point to me, it's just frequent money.

Speaker 3 (23:38):
Yeah, I mean, it's just it could it could be
so much worse. And I'm not like she'd I get
what she's saying too. Yeah, I don't know, listen, how
much does the relationship mean to you? Because if it
means the world to you and you would be horrified,
would you be horrified to lose her?

Speaker 4 (23:55):
Could you picture your life without her?

Speaker 15 (23:56):
Well, honestly, this is probably the best woman I've had
in my life. I was a young child, So I mean, yeah.

Speaker 3 (24:02):
Okay, then we gotta we gotta figure it out. We
gotta figure it out. Sit down with her, ask her, like,
keep having those conversations, ask her what you know A
good amount for her is. But if you're turning fifty
dollars into thirty six hundred and you're banking some of
that money, she's gonna have to She's gotta, she's gotta,
you know, maybe allow a little bit of it. But no, listen,

(24:24):
one hundred dollars a week. I'm I'm impressed with those numbers.
But again, I come from a gambling family. Like I said,
a minimum, I like to gamble, but.

Speaker 15 (24:32):
I mean also I like money more than anything.

Speaker 16 (24:34):
So it's like, I mean, I want.

Speaker 15 (24:36):
To try to risk to get money, but I also
don't want to.

Speaker 16 (24:38):
Hurt my pockets.

Speaker 15 (24:38):
If I don't hate you know.

Speaker 3 (24:39):
What I'm saying, Maybe maybe every other week as opposed
to every week.

Speaker 4 (24:44):
Then you can then you could look then you could look.

Speaker 3 (24:45):
Forward to Yeah, yeah you guys, hey converse, figure it out.
This is horrible advice, but you're not even that bad.
I thought it was gonna be way worse. Like I
wish I could talk to her. I would tell her, honey,
this is not unless it gets it's crazy and it
becomes a problem.

Speaker 4 (25:01):
This isn't this isn't that bad. Yeah, all right, Jamie, Well,
god speed, good luck.

Speaker 16 (25:08):
I appreciate it.

Speaker 3 (25:10):
I just one.

Speaker 4 (25:11):
Hundred a week is not bad.

Speaker 6 (25:13):
It's not bad. But I wonder if it's more than
that too.

Speaker 5 (25:15):
And then also is there a pattern that she's realizing
that this could kind of well, maybe she's.

Speaker 3 (25:19):
Worried a hundred is going to turn to one thousand
and all. Think I get it. I get it. But
like again, in my household, the minimum bet is one hundred,
like a hundred changed, Like my brother has lost full
rent checks, you know, full rent checks.

Speaker 4 (25:33):
You want to go to real quick? We have time
mo is in Lowell him.

Speaker 17 (25:37):
Good morning, Hija.

Speaker 3 (25:39):
I mean Ashley, the hell is Jess.

Speaker 14 (25:44):
Like you?

Speaker 3 (25:48):
Well, I said, Jess, my love, So listen, you want
to give us the girlfriend perspective.

Speaker 4 (25:53):
You know on this, do you so you're with somebody
that gambles.

Speaker 3 (25:55):
I'm assuming yes.

Speaker 4 (25:57):
Okay, and how do you feel about the gambling?

Speaker 14 (26:01):
So I was just telling Santi, we're like twenty year olds.
So my perspective is I'm at a point where I'm
always imagining our future and his girlfriend's probably like in
the same phase, and he's just being kind of selfish
because the money he's using isn't really cushion money. It's

(26:23):
like money they can be prioritizing for their future goals together.

Speaker 4 (26:27):
I see that twenty is also very young.

Speaker 3 (26:30):
Call me crazy, though, If he's paying the bills, like
if he's paying the rent check and he's making sure
everything's taken care of and he has the.

Speaker 4 (26:39):
Money to gamble on this, like, I don't know.

Speaker 3 (26:42):
I mean, that's heart right, that's a little bit. If
they're splitting the bills.

Speaker 6 (26:46):
Yes, it's a different story.

Speaker 16 (26:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (26:48):
If he's splitting the bills, I'm even more so, like, no,
you need to listen to her. This is unfair. What
if you cannot give your point. But he pays the rent,
he pays the.

Speaker 6 (26:57):
Bills, so he should have some play money there.

Speaker 5 (26:59):
So that to that point absolutely, yes, right, yeah.

Speaker 14 (27:03):
Well yeah, there's definitely like a point of compromise that
I've like like allowed myself to work with him on.
But to be honest, like I don't believe that they
progress and make improvements, Like you're only going to get
more addicted, Like you're only going to become more fix
stated to it. You can prioritize bills and stuff now,

(27:27):
but like when you're really down on like in the barrel,
you won't be able to make that call because you're
the one that's making like the vision's decision to use
the money.

Speaker 3 (27:37):
All right, mo, I get what you're saying, and thank
you for the call. There's there's multiple things here. I
mean number one, A lot of times when you deal
with somebody who's again I'm speaking of experience who gambles
it usually Yeah, it might not get better, but I've
seen it get better. Also, like my brother is when
it comes to his gambling, so much better than he
used to because he got a female in his life
that was like you got to figure it out. Yeah,

(28:00):
dare I say and put this back on Jamie's girlfriend.
You don't pay rent, the man pays rent. What if
you guys did have to split the rent. Why don't
you take that money that you would have been paying
for rent, that half and put that away start building
a seed. I mean, listen, I'm just saying it is
different to me in that conversation because he pays the bills.

(28:21):
If they were splitting everything, then I would start to
get nervous. Well, what if one month you don't have
your half? What are we going to do?

Speaker 6 (28:27):
And then go back to it.

Speaker 3 (28:28):
One hundred dollars is not that much to be spending.

Speaker 4 (28:31):
And he said he loves her.

Speaker 3 (28:32):
You were answering the phone, But it's like I love
her because I said, how much does she mean to
because she might walk? And he's like, no shit, So
they'll they'll work it out. Maybe the only gamble was
twice a month as opposed to every week. But she
needs a show because also gimbling is someone it's exciting.
One hundred dollars a week is not the better, especially

(28:53):
if the man is paying the bills.

Speaker 4 (28:55):
But I get it to each their own. I'm not
in that relationship.

Speaker 3 (28:58):
I love you guys, though the check in is nothing
with you six one seven nine three one one nine
four five we're talking about whatever you want. Hi, everybody,
good morning. It's Ashley the gym in morning show. We're
doing the check in right now, checking in on you, your life,
anything you want. People are calling us for advice today.
I love it. I'm invested at six one seven nine
three one one nine four five. That is six one

(29:18):
seven nine three one one nine four five. Ruben also
celebrated his birthday last week. Ruben Happy belated. When was yours?

Speaker 12 (29:28):
Mine?

Speaker 16 (29:29):
Was the fourteen?

Speaker 4 (29:30):
The fourteen?

Speaker 15 (29:31):
Watching you guys.

Speaker 16 (29:31):
I've been listening to you guys all the time.

Speaker 17 (29:33):
You guys.

Speaker 15 (29:33):
You know, you guys made me like you guys, make
me happy?

Speaker 12 (29:37):
You know?

Speaker 4 (29:37):
Oh well that listen. That's literally what we're trying to do.

Speaker 3 (29:40):
We could be going through it outside of here, but
our job is to come in here, make you happy,
make you laugh, make you you know, just stop thinking
about all the crazies in your own life. How was
your actual birthday? Do we do something on Friday?

Speaker 10 (29:53):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (29:54):
My girl took me out to Eve.

Speaker 16 (29:55):
She did a couple of days.

Speaker 17 (29:56):
You bought me stuff.

Speaker 16 (29:57):
It's my first birthday. Well I haven't had to buy
my I hope something.

Speaker 12 (30:00):
You know.

Speaker 3 (30:01):
Wow, this is nice?

Speaker 4 (30:03):
How long and you have you and her been dating?

Speaker 15 (30:06):
We've been together for about seven years?

Speaker 3 (30:08):
Damn?

Speaker 4 (30:09):
Are we is this boyfriend and girlfriend?

Speaker 16 (30:12):
Or is this like she's like more, she's like more wife.
We got married in jail.

Speaker 1 (30:17):
Sorry to say that, you know, you know.

Speaker 4 (30:19):
Hey, don't apologize for that.

Speaker 3 (30:20):
You So you got married in jail, as in, you
were together, you went to jail, and then you got
How does that work?

Speaker 16 (30:27):
Yeah? I think you gotta do a whole process and
all that extra stuff.

Speaker 3 (30:32):
You gotta go to the awarden and all that.

Speaker 16 (30:34):
It was not really awarding.

Speaker 3 (30:35):
It's just the share of that jail. Okay, guys.

Speaker 16 (30:38):
That the way I listen to you guys like every day.

Speaker 4 (30:40):
You know, Wow, this is fascinating to me.

Speaker 16 (30:43):
Ruby.

Speaker 3 (30:43):
So did she was she allowed to physically come in
for you guys to get married in there.

Speaker 15 (30:47):
Or like yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah you got to
you get to get physically.

Speaker 4 (30:52):
Oh did she wear white?

Speaker 3 (30:54):
Yeah?

Speaker 10 (30:55):
You were white?

Speaker 4 (30:56):
Wow, this is crazy. So what year did you get
married in jail?

Speaker 1 (31:00):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (31:01):
Yeah, oh yeah, cursed yeap. He can't remember the wedding date,
so he was like what then he just dropped like, Ruben,
So this year.

Speaker 6 (31:11):
Is twenty twenty two.

Speaker 16 (31:12):
We got in twenty twenty two.

Speaker 3 (31:14):
This is twenty twenty five. So in twenty twenty two
you had a wedding behind bars, And how is everything now?

Speaker 4 (31:21):
I mean, clearly she's a dab. She held you down.

Speaker 3 (31:25):
Yeah, yeah, good. I got when I got out, we
ended up having two kids.

Speaker 1 (31:29):
I got a boy and a girl.

Speaker 13 (31:31):
My daughter she's like, she's about to be two in April,
and she's just like the best.

Speaker 16 (31:36):
And then I got a little junior.

Speaker 8 (31:38):
He's the best.

Speaker 3 (31:39):
This is great.

Speaker 4 (31:40):
How long were you in for man?

Speaker 2 (31:42):
There were four years?

Speaker 3 (31:44):
Four year bid trafficking? Yeah, nothing crazy, crime wasn't crazy?

Speaker 5 (31:48):
When you got married, did you have to wait until
you got out to like consummate?

Speaker 6 (31:52):
Yeah?

Speaker 11 (31:53):
What's that mean?

Speaker 3 (31:56):
Well, they were dating prior to son, so they probably
made sweet love before he went to and the Distant
And then you were in Santi's basically asking could you
like do anything physical?

Speaker 1 (32:07):
No?

Speaker 3 (32:07):
No, no, not in Massachusetts.

Speaker 16 (32:09):
They don't have that in Magitudin.

Speaker 4 (32:10):
Yeah no, they're only doing that at Fort Dix.

Speaker 3 (32:12):
You know what I mean? All right, Ruben, Well, wow,
this was so interesting. I actually, you know, in the
movies they can get married in jail. I don't know
if that was like a real life thing. But that
is that's wild. That's really crazy that you did that.

Speaker 16 (32:24):
Yeah, I just wanted to call and check in with
you guys. I hope you guys have a great day.

Speaker 3 (32:29):
You're wow you as well, Ruben, thank you so much.

Speaker 4 (32:32):
You taught us something today.

Speaker 3 (32:32):
We appreciate that.

Speaker 5 (32:33):
Oh my god, fascinating, fascinating, so interesting, and like you
gotta find the right person to want to like get
married in prison and wait for you when you're done.

Speaker 6 (32:42):
Like, that's pretty impressive.

Speaker 3 (32:43):
That's beyond And I love how he threw that in there,
as if we wouldn't care.

Speaker 4 (32:48):
It just like a little something. Well, yeah, no, we
we actually got.

Speaker 3 (32:51):
Married in jail. What you guys just have never ceased
to have. Maybe that's why the check in is, hands down,
without a doubt, my favorite favorite part of the day
because we're always.

Speaker 4 (33:04):
Learning something, and so is he. He's looking up consummate
as we speak.

Speaker 2 (33:07):
Day Morning show, Good Morning Sustain's number one for hip
hop Jammin ninety four five.

Speaker 4 (33:17):
Hi doll, good morning.

Speaker 3 (33:20):
There is. There are sorry, so many different ways to
access the show. You can always call us six one
seven nine three one one nine four five, or you
could dm us at Sandi Diolio at Ashley Felman two,
he's on the Ashley. And then there's also the talkback feature,
which is cool because a lot of people do listen
via the app. Once Jamin is on the app live,

(33:40):
there's a little red microphone. It pops up and you
can leave us messages like this Happy Monday.

Speaker 18 (33:45):
No matter how hard I try, I always get roped
into my dumb coworkers stupid bulleted. Like you ever just
have a coworker where you look at them and their
existence just kills your soul. Like it honestly, you feel
a part of your soul dying as you have to
look at them.

Speaker 3 (34:02):
Like, forget throwing them down a flight of stairs.

Speaker 18 (34:04):
I want to throw myself down a flight of stairs
just so I can go to the hospital and be
hooked up on drugs and I'll.

Speaker 3 (34:09):
Have to freaking see them. Happy Monday. Yeah, you know
what's crazy? Though, as aggressive as that is.

Speaker 6 (34:16):
That's relatable absolutely.

Speaker 3 (34:17):
I mean, we weren't talking about coworkers. He left us
that talkback out of nowhere, but that is relatable content
because I think we could all tell a story about
a coworker in our time that we were just like
I mean, I I had one we don't even name names, yeah,
but I had one forever ago, and it got so

(34:41):
bad that I didn't want to be in the same studio.
Like when there were breaks, I wouldn't stay in the studio.

Speaker 5 (34:46):
I would go out, which is like really hard to do, right,
especially when you have this job and it's kind of intimate.

Speaker 3 (34:52):
In any ways and really also not me at all,
that's not really, but you know there are some people
where it's like it's just a cloud and I couldn't
do it. I cut a handlets.

Speaker 5 (35:02):
Similar I worked with another guy at another station, and
like he started having meltdown so bad that it was
consuming everybody else's lives. There was one meeting where he
started crying. He put his feet up on the on
like the couch and was in tears about his home life.
But he was cause he was the cause of everything,
to the point where like I would show up to
work in the middle of the night, get all my
work done that I had to do before the show,

(35:24):
then drive around just to minimize the time I spent
with him.

Speaker 6 (35:27):
But then it didn't end.

Speaker 3 (35:28):
Then that part is crazy. I don't think people guys
heid he would get to work. Think of mornings and
the hour in which he would get there. He would
do what he would need to do, and then he
would leave so he wouldn't have to be in there
any extra time with the man that's insane.

Speaker 5 (35:41):
And I would spend most of my time driving around
South Boston. I would park I think it's Carson Beach
and just sit there until like the last minute I
had to go into the radio station, and then he
would calm In the afternoon. It'd be another couple of
hours of like consumed with his bs. It was awful.

Speaker 4 (35:56):
I was I was like and and the co host
at the time. The two of them was good either.

Speaker 5 (36:00):
No, they were speak consistently fighting and then I tried.
There were so many things that were happening at that time,
but like his existence was sucking the soul out of
my life.

Speaker 3 (36:09):
Radio is weird too, because you know, very I was
very fortunate with when I finally was my turn to
have my own show, I was allowed to pick you
and feign like I got to say, hey, this is
who I want to be a part of this show.
It's not always like that in radio. Sometimes they call
it like arranged marriages and they put two personalities together,

(36:31):
they hope for the best, and it's just not always
the best.

Speaker 6 (36:34):
I don't know.

Speaker 5 (36:35):
I would say more time than none, it works out
like often that it doesn't work. I like that because, like, listen,
I think on paper, you think some people get along
or there's a combination that you see they like, oh,
that would be funny to see these two people making
jokes together, but they take out the fact of like
do these people like each other and how will they
get along?

Speaker 6 (36:51):
Off the air.

Speaker 3 (36:53):
This is going to sound literally crazy, but this person
used to eat a protein bar every morning. And this
person would take the protein bar and and like rip
it off into little like pieces and then take those
pieces and go like this over and over and over

(37:13):
and make them a little ball and then pop the
ball in their mouth. Like imagine taking taking a protein
bar and turning it into like seventy five milk duds.

Speaker 6 (37:24):
Like why I don't shave. I don't either, that's crazy.

Speaker 3 (37:28):
And it was like I was we already weren't well,
and so then when that would happen, like that's so
stupid and that's nothingness.

Speaker 4 (37:33):
It would drive me nuts.

Speaker 5 (37:36):
I feel like if I did that, it would bother you,
but it'd be it would be a joke between us.
It had to be because you guys were not getting along,
but like you didn't like him.

Speaker 3 (37:44):
Yeah, and well, the thing is is, I never said
it was him.

Speaker 6 (37:46):
The thing is is, I'm sorry, I'm the idiot.

Speaker 3 (37:50):
It's not that we didn't get along. We just weren't
a good fit for Okay. I didn't know that until
you just confirmed it.

Speaker 4 (37:59):
I said, I never say anybody else got a game.

Speaker 17 (38:02):
Anything else got a crazy coworker tale they want to
tell six one seven nine three one one nine four
five six one seven nine one one nine four five
coworker problem is Hi, everybody.

Speaker 4 (38:13):
Good morning.

Speaker 3 (38:14):
It's Ashley in the gym in morning show. We're talking
crazy coworker stories. We got to talk about from a
guy and he's like, I just it's in one day
and he's probably driving to work thinking, oh God, I
don't want to see so and so for from work.
And I said, that's very relatable. You can't possibly it's
a blessing if you do. But every single person that
you work, but there's got to be one where you're like,

(38:35):
oh god, Joe's here. There's definitely people here, right now
in the building and you must feel that way about yeah,
for sure, But overwhelmingly, I like a lot of people
in this building.

Speaker 4 (38:47):
Wesley is in Boston, Wesley, good.

Speaker 9 (38:49):
Morning, Good morning.

Speaker 3 (38:52):
So you work in healthcare and there's you, there's a
specific person that works in there, and this woman was
just sucking the souls out of people, like just taking
everybody's energy.

Speaker 4 (39:00):
Like they walked in the room and it.

Speaker 16 (39:02):
Was like, yeah, this this coworker was like the Shang
Sung of healthcare or remoter combat fans just would drain
the life out of you.

Speaker 1 (39:14):
You did, you dreaded coming to work, and we work
in healthcare, so I mean, you gotta love what you do.
I love what I did. I just hated working with her,
especially when it compromised patient safety and patient care.

Speaker 3 (39:26):
That would be tough. Yeah, I mean, especially like people
were at risk. Yeah, listen, I also feel like in
our building over the last few months, the energy there's
like a shift in energy. So then there's that a
little bit going on and sadness and things. But I mean, listen,
if you go into work every day and you love
the person that you work with, Unluckily I can say

(39:48):
that I do. You can You're very lucky, because it's
just not always like that. It's not Wesley. Thanks for
the call. But yeah, I think we everybody has a
story about a coworker that's absolutely nuts.

Speaker 5 (39:59):
I want to say that anybody here right now at
the moment that I despise like that, I don't either.

Speaker 3 (40:02):
But I think we can also say with the most
respect that Justin from kiss Went to Wait is a lunatic.
Oh my godness, He's a literal lunatic. Like we we
it's very serious if we joke, but like the man
wakes up and he's just.

Speaker 5 (40:18):
Like, yeah, I have never met somebody besides the Hulk
that's like that mad like all the time.

Speaker 4 (40:24):
It's got to be a.

Speaker 3 (40:25):
Testoterone, you know what I mean.

Speaker 4 (40:26):
We love him, though.

Speaker 3 (40:27):
Shout out to Justin from Kissing Away.

Speaker 15 (40:33):
Good morning.

Speaker 2 (40:34):
Bustin's number one for hip hop jam in ninety four
or five.

Speaker 3 (40:41):
Hi, everybody, good morning. I'm not on the talk like that.
I don't really ever go on TikTok. Somebody sends me
a video, I have it just so that way I
can open up the video to the full screen. But
I know there's all different types of talks, Like there's
lesbian talk, there's.

Speaker 6 (40:58):
Mom talks my favorite, there's uh, what's.

Speaker 4 (41:01):
The wife trad wife talk? You know, there's some type
of thing.

Speaker 6 (41:04):
And then I also perused the gay talk to just kidding.

Speaker 3 (41:07):
Okay, no you're not, No, you're not.

Speaker 4 (41:11):
But there was a trending thing on on on.

Speaker 3 (41:13):
TikTok the other day where it was like red flags
that you stayed in the relationship through, like something just
so blatantly obvious that you're with a killer and you
just stayed.

Speaker 5 (41:24):
Now I would kill that you were like a bad partner.
This one girl was talking about she stayed with her
man even through the fact that he wouldn't stop communicating
his ex and that he would go visit her when
he was out of town, and she stayed through all that.

Speaker 4 (41:36):
And she still stayed.

Speaker 3 (41:38):
And we were like flabberg acid, We're like, who are
these people who?

Speaker 13 (41:42):
How?

Speaker 4 (41:43):
Like how are you staying?

Speaker 5 (41:45):
But then you start thinking about your past and like,
I stayed, not even I stayed.

Speaker 6 (41:51):
I was willing to go back to my ex.

Speaker 5 (41:53):
Even begged her to stay with me after another guy
dropped her off, Like yeah.

Speaker 3 (41:58):
Well I've done that. I couldn't think of a red
flag that I quote stayed through because I think I would,
like the lies were so good that I never noticed.
But when I got cheated on, when I caught him
had he said like the next week, I'll take.

Speaker 4 (42:12):
You back out a full sprinted Yeah, And then my
ego was so hurt.

Speaker 5 (42:16):
And there were a lot of stories like that, like
blatantly cheating, getting busted, but then the guy would somehow
manipulate and turn her around on her, my girl believing
him and then taking him back.

Speaker 3 (42:24):
But they it wasn't all about that, because there's so
because there's so many people go through things like daily
in their relationship and then once they're out of it
and they have the blinders off there like oh my god.
Like AJ had an example I I I couldn't fathom this.

Speaker 4 (42:39):
I couldn't fathom this.

Speaker 3 (42:41):
This gives me the vibe of like you and your
husband are home on trash day and your husband says
to you go take the trash out like I'm leaving,
you know, I'm out.

Speaker 4 (42:52):
When AJ told us this, I was like, wait, who explained?

Speaker 7 (42:56):
So I was once in a relationship and he would
have me pump his gas for him.

Speaker 3 (43:02):
Guys, why by the way, he was in the car
so they're in the car and you would pull up
to the gas station and.

Speaker 7 (43:10):
He would always I would try to like sit there
and knock it out, and he would be like, come on,
get out, So I'd have to get out and pump
his gas for him.

Speaker 4 (43:17):
But what was the rationale?

Speaker 7 (43:19):
Like, I have no idea, Like I look back at
that and I'm like, I don't know why.

Speaker 4 (43:23):
I mean, it just flash how probably I own you?

Speaker 3 (43:27):
But like when it started, what did he say to
you the first time?

Speaker 4 (43:32):
Get out?

Speaker 7 (43:32):
Yeah, I really can't remember.

Speaker 4 (43:34):
I don't know that.

Speaker 7 (43:35):
I can't remember the first time, but I just remember
anytime I was in the car with him, unless he
was mad at me, he would make me get out
and pump his.

Speaker 4 (43:43):
Gas, which is crazy.

Speaker 3 (43:44):
So if he was mad at her, then he wouldn't
ask her to pump the gas and she would be
like I.

Speaker 7 (43:49):
Was so damaged that like whenever he didn't have me
get out pump the gas, I was like, what did
I do wrong?

Speaker 9 (43:55):
Like why is he mad at me?

Speaker 3 (43:56):
Now?

Speaker 9 (43:56):
Like it was it was bad.

Speaker 6 (43:58):
It is really bad.

Speaker 3 (43:59):
That's like crazy crazy.

Speaker 5 (44:02):
But the fact that, and I think to your point,
it's some sort of like dominance on it.

Speaker 4 (44:06):
It has to be like I own her. She does
things for me.

Speaker 6 (44:10):
But you stay.

Speaker 9 (44:11):
I stayed, Yeah, eleven years.

Speaker 5 (44:13):
Just pumping gas in the winter, out and everything frigid, shivering.

Speaker 7 (44:18):
I tried to think, like, was he ever with me?
Did he ever pump my gas?

Speaker 9 (44:22):
And I don't. I don't think he ever did.

Speaker 3 (44:25):
Also, this is not to say like on some damsel
in distress, like I need someone to take the trash
off for me.

Speaker 4 (44:31):
I need someone to pump my gas.

Speaker 3 (44:32):
But if my husband is around, like I could be
driving my own car and pull into a gas station
because I need gas in my own car and he's
getting out to pump the gain, he's gonna pump the gas.

Speaker 4 (44:44):
He's gonna he's at home with me. It's trash that
he's taking out the trash.

Speaker 6 (44:48):
You know what's funny about that?

Speaker 5 (44:48):
When we pump gas and everybody's there and my wife
is there, I always get out. I jokingly would be like,
I'm not pumping it, but I know I'm gonna pump it.

Speaker 6 (44:55):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (44:56):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (44:56):
And again this is like that I.

Speaker 5 (44:58):
Don't what even for Like if somebody pulls up and
sees the guy inside the car with the girl pumping
the gas, I would pump it just to avoid that embarrassment.

Speaker 4 (45:06):
I always think, even when we're driving.

Speaker 3 (45:09):
If I if I'm like, honey, let's go somewhere, right,
and we go, we drive somewhere and he's in the
passenger I always feel like he looks like a bit.

Speaker 6 (45:18):
Oh okay like that.

Speaker 3 (45:20):
I don't mind if I don't know, yeah, I know,
I listen. I'd rather not drive, but sometimes i'm driving.
It's strange to me when he's in my passenger seat.

Speaker 6 (45:29):
Like, so, do you never drive them when you guys
it together?

Speaker 4 (45:32):
I do often. I just like, yeah, I'm like, you're
a bitch.

Speaker 3 (45:36):
You're in this on the motorcycle right, Like, get up me, man.
I don't know why, but anyways, that's a that's a
bad one.

Speaker 4 (45:48):
And she that happened.

Speaker 3 (45:49):
Early on in her relationship, and she was like, I'm
just the gas pumper.

Speaker 5 (45:52):
In retrospect, though, we all have these things when you
look back on like, I would never do that again.
And most of the time when this is happening, you're
usually young.

Speaker 3 (45:58):
Does anybody have a red flag that they remember in
a past relationship that they when it was happening, you
were like, oh, this makes complete sense, and then once
you got out of it, you're like, wait a second,
what the hell is happening? Six one seven nine three
one one nine four five six one seven nine three
one one nine four five. We're talking ignored bad red flags.

Speaker 4 (46:20):
Hi, everybody, good morning.

Speaker 9 (46:21):
It's actually in the gym in morning show.

Speaker 4 (46:24):
We were just talking about red flags.

Speaker 3 (46:27):
I think, listen, we can all think of old relationships
and now that we're out of them and the blinders
are off of red flags. I dated a guy once
that I could make cry in ten seconds red flag,
like why are you crying? You know?

Speaker 6 (46:42):
And it was really a big that's he cried a lot.

Speaker 3 (46:47):
But that, listen, that's minor in comparison. By the way,
j was just starting right there. She could probably name
seven other red flags. But she was saying how the
guy she was dating for an years would make her
pump the gas, like they would pull into a gas station.
He would go get out, go pump the gas. But
you have other ones. What's another one that you've told

(47:09):
people that you stayed through and they were just like
flabbergasted that you stayed in a relationship after eleven years.

Speaker 9 (47:16):
Oh my god, there's so many.

Speaker 7 (47:17):
I'm like I'm trying to think there was an incident
where we This one was a really bad one. We
went away and he got mad at me. We were
people watching and drinking, and I got mad at me
for apparently looking at some guy. Mind you, we are
people watching, right, And he got up left and said
that he was going to leave me where we were, and.

Speaker 4 (47:38):
It was far away from her house, it was like
two hours away.

Speaker 3 (47:41):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (47:41):
So if you're watching people walk by and say somebody
has a weird haircut, that kind of questions you in
your mind. You're like, what is that guy thinking by
getting that? So you look too long into somebody like that?
And he took that as what that you wanted to
be with this person?

Speaker 7 (47:53):
Absolutely, like yeah, because the first thing that he said
to me was like you interested, And I had no
idea what he was talking about. And he was like
you can stay here, and then went back to our
room and said that he was gonna leave.

Speaker 1 (48:04):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (48:05):
He also gifted her something and then straight up said
to her like, hey, if this isn't something that like
wear them for a couple of days, and if this
isn't something that you want, you know, after a couple days,
we don't think that this is you, then we'll take
them back. And so she was honest. After two days
and it was that was like close to the end,
and that turned.

Speaker 9 (48:23):
Into yeah, that was actually yeah.

Speaker 7 (48:25):
It was probably a few months before things officially ended.
And I remember I told him like the you know,
these just aren't for me. They were earrings and I
wasn't gonna wear them like every day, and he was like,
don't worry, I'll take them back. You won't have to
tell your boyfriend where you got them.

Speaker 13 (48:38):
And I was like, you know what you.

Speaker 5 (48:40):
Want is the worst one I remember her telling us
was the autocrac one where you texted him something that
was that.

Speaker 7 (48:47):
Was literally like what like really ended things. I had
to text.

Speaker 9 (48:52):
Him every morning at seven am.

Speaker 7 (48:53):
He wasn't even up yet, but at seven am I
had to text him because he would not text me
when he woke up. So I went to text him
morning and I did it so fast that it some
I don't know how it turned into Friday question mark,
but again it was so fast I sent it and
then I was like, oh, lol, haha, morning.

Speaker 9 (49:10):
Like I fixed it.

Speaker 7 (49:11):
A couple hours later he woke up and like, this
is such an fed up way to wake up, like
blah blah blah said he was gonna come like get
his stuff at my house, like with cops and stuff,
because he thought I was texting somebody else about making
plans on Friday.

Speaker 3 (49:22):
And I will so I come in here that morning,
and her and I are trying to like she's so
thrown off by it, she's nervous now. Her and I
were trying to I must have typed like sixteen things
to twenty things into my phone to we were trying
to figure out how it auto corrected from morning to Friday,

(49:44):
and we couldn't figure because we were gonna like record
it for him, like crazy.

Speaker 9 (49:48):
Yeah you were.

Speaker 7 (49:48):
You were trying so hard to help me. But yeah,
I still to this day have no idea like why
it did that. But like if I wanted to lie,
I would have.

Speaker 4 (49:55):
Come up with a more believable lie.

Speaker 7 (49:57):
I would have been like I'm texting Rachel about planting,
you know what I mean?

Speaker 5 (50:00):
Like I could have And even if you were saying
Friday to somebody, what if you were texting some coworker
asking about like an interview or something like that.

Speaker 4 (50:07):
He was, no, Yeah, he was.

Speaker 7 (50:10):
He had a lot of since the very beginning of
the relationship, he had a lot of issues with.

Speaker 9 (50:15):
I don't know insecurity.

Speaker 7 (50:16):
He always thought that I wanted to be with somebody else.
I thought that was doing stuff behind his bas She.

Speaker 5 (50:22):
Had a crush on you at one points, Right, weren't
you not allowed to wear certain type of garment to crime? No?

Speaker 9 (50:29):
Actually, actually.

Speaker 6 (50:32):
This one is really bad to I used to.

Speaker 7 (50:35):
Wear thongs during the day, and eventually I was just like,
songs are annoying. I don't want to anymore. So I
started wearing like cheeky boy shorts all the time. And
one time he got drunk and was like, ever since
you stopped working with Santi, you stopped wearing.

Speaker 4 (50:53):
He was wearing.

Speaker 6 (50:56):
Thank you for wearing for me. Now that we work
together again, are they back off? Like that's crazy?

Speaker 4 (51:04):
No, it's like you think that.

Speaker 3 (51:06):
But and then I also, I just got a DM
from a girl that was like I can one up
that said she was with a guy for three years,
never met a single family member, never met a single friend,
and every like time would go by, she said she
just kept pushing, pushing, pushing never happened. Obviously, come to
find out she was the other She was the side.

(51:29):
But listen, the things we think were doing for.

Speaker 5 (51:32):
Love, well, I think at least most people, I feel
like when they come across us, they get out of
the relationship. And again, if you're stuck in one, rethink
the red flags because those things are real on your Yeah.

Speaker 3 (51:43):
If anything AJ just said triggers you where you're like, well,
I'm actually dealing with the same thing, then yeah, you
should figure that. Unless you're wearing thongs for your coworker,
you need to figure figure out the things out