January 8, 2025 • 19 mins
Nick talks about being lazy during the winter, insurance commercials are evil, and 2025 is going to be a good year...probably
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
Speaking that that should not have made it to the
rest of us.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
This is inside thoughts. Check check check. Welcome back to
inside thoughts. Hope you are enjoying your life. Sorry I
took the week off. I'm being lazy, man, But guess what,
this is the time to do it. It's cold, stay inside,
(00:31):
eat the food that you like, get a little chubby.
It's okay, it's wintertime. This one. You're supposed to do it. Everybody,
You're like, no, New Year's resolution. I gotta I gotta
do all the things.
Speaker 1 (00:43):
Man.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
You want to go to the gym as the same
time as everybody's going to gym. No tank December, January,
maybe even a little bit of February off. Get back
into it when it starts getting a little warmer. You're
gonna like being outside more. There's gonna be less people
in the gym, less people jogging on the side of
(01:04):
the street. It's gonna be nice. That's all you gotta do.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
No, I'm January first going to the gem well, you know,
and be a little hungover. January first, maybe maybe January second. Yeah,
I'll go January second. Everybody's in the gym. Bro it sucks.
It's not fun. It's cold outside. Don't go to the gym.
(01:29):
Don't get in your car.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
I know a lot of you don't have the push
to start warm up your car. It's gonna be cold
when you get in there. Don't do that. Stay inside, binge.
Some stuff to watch on some good Netflix documentaries right now.
Been watching Turning Point, the Adam Bomb, the Cold War
(01:52):
US Russia. Very interesting stuff. Long episodes, hour long, nine episodes.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
It's Goodry Springer documentary just dropped.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
There's gonna be a bunch of good ones. Stay inside,
watch TV. Eat food that makes you happy. Okay, because
it's getting dark, it's cold, your body feels sad. The
sun's not here. Okay, so just you know, don't fight it.
I gotta go get my endorphins from the gym. No, No,
don't do that. You think the caveman, the cavemen way
(02:24):
back in time, we're doing that in the wintertime. Think
the Native Americans were doing that. No, they were staying
in their caves, in their tps, getting fat for the
winter months so that they stayed warm. That's what you
need to be doing. Don't buy into all this Instagram propaganda.
(02:45):
You need to get your thumberbod. Now everybolace wearing baggy clothes,
be fat. It's fine. Work your way in, do some
push ups at home if you need to. You know
what I mean. No, dude, no dude, not buying that.
I gotta wake up five am, run down the street
with my little reflector vest on so everybody knows. Don't
come in my waye bro, I'm a unit, okay, David Goggins,
(03:09):
Nobody wants to hang out with you. You're being a weirdo.
All right, Just relax on. I gotta gotta turn this
off real quick. Sorry, the cat turned on. It's automatic toy,
so I don't have to play with it. I've been
playing with the cat a lot. Also, just been eating food,
(03:31):
watching TV, getting fat. We've been watching so much TV, man.
I love watching the commercials in between the shows, because, yeah,
I'm a poor piece of shit. I'm not paying for
the upgraded version. It used to be free. And then
they're like, there's too many people not watching commercials. What's
jack the price up? You can pay for the no
(03:53):
commercial premium, But if you want to keep that stuff
that you were normally havn't at that price, guess what
you're gonna watch commercials. So guess what I'm doing watching commercials.
There's a lot of dating commercials right now, like an
insane frequency of them. And it's Match dot com, it's Hinge,
it's tender bumble. Don't have any commercials because you know
(04:14):
they know that one's not gonna work. But they're all there.
You want to know why because all those dating sites,
they know what time it is, they know it's dark,
they know it's cold, they know you're alone, you're watching TV.
You're getting fat. Hey, Match dot com is here for you.
It's evil. It's evil. They're trying to take advantage of you.
(04:37):
They're praying on you, and that always how commercials work
and advertising guys, it's thing.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Yeah, but guess what. I don't like seeing it. It's evil.
It's making people more sad.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
It's making people want to go run outside at five
am with the reflector vest so that they don't get fat.
Maybe somebody will love them if they're not a little
extra chubby. It's winter time. Relax, don't be attacking people.
Match dot com, Hinge, leave alone. Okay, it's wintertime. Just relax,
(05:10):
take some time, move a little slower. We're not doing shit,
it's gonna be okay, we'll start warming up. It'll be fine.
I gotta go run at five am. Guess what, You're
not gonna see some black eyes. You're gonna break your ankle.
That's a big hospital bill, okay, and then you're gonna
get fat anyway. Plus you gotta bill. You're mad that
(05:31):
you gotta bill, and you're frustrated that you can't move. Okay.
Nobody's gonna love you with a broken ankle. Okay, you're
just gonna see all those match dot com commercials going
Nobody loves me. You're gonna go into even a deeper depression.
All you gotta do. It's just nothing over the winter.
Stop watching those evil commercials. Most commercials are evil though,
(05:53):
like uh they got like all the dating website commercials
going on now. But the only other type of commercial
that plays more frequently than those right now or the
insurance commercials. Those insurance commercials are insane, like they all
have like their way of scaring you into get insurance
or bullying you to get insurance. Like Geico, they brought
(06:16):
back the Caveman kids. If you don't remember the early
two thousands, Geico so easy to use, or Geico dot
Com so easy to use. Even a caveman can do it.
They're bullying this guy now they're bringing him back. Younger
people don't understand the loar of the caveman, so it
just looks like they're bullying a caveman, a low IQ
(06:36):
human being, like, hey, this guy's retarded. You don't have Geico.
That's how you're selling insurance, making fun of dumb people. Okay.
All State they just act like the mafia. Hey, I Mayheim,
and if you don't have all State, you're not gonna
be able to protect yourself like Mayhem, like me, you
(06:58):
better get it. Your house is gonna burned down. Where
they walk up and they're like, yeah, you're in good
hands all State, get us or else Mayhem's gonna come back.
That's extortion, Okay, that's what they're doing. And then State
Farm they're just attacking, you know, your insecurities. They just
got all the cool people like hey, Patrick Mahomes, Andy Reid.
Speaker 3 (07:21):
They're reading chicken nuggies together. Jake from State Farm, he
looks pretty cool. Used to be a goofy looking insurance guy.
Now he's super cool looking. If you don't have State farmed.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
You're not cool. They're like feeding on your high school insecurity.
I want to be a popular kid. Well, you better
get state farmed. Pat Mahomes has it the devil himself.
I don't know. I'm sorry, I'm being negative. Maybe the
New Year will be better. Twenty twenty five will be better.
(07:53):
Maybe it will be I don't know. Do you see
what Trump said. We're gonna change the Gulf of Mexico's
name to the Gulf of America. It's a great name
and actually a lot more correct. The just go it
off script. We're gonna take Greenland, We're gonna invade Canada.
(08:17):
We're taking back to Panama Canal, and we have the
Gulf of America. Twenty twenty five might be better, you never know,
not sure, but it could be. You know. Do you
have a good New Year? I had a good New Year.
New Year's was fun, you know, did the show. Shout
out to Pete Lee. He was cool, It was cool,
(08:40):
got home safely, you know, enjoyed myself, did what I
had to do. I just everybody's getting greedy. Man. Do
you see uber prices on New Year's that that should
be illegal. We're uber, We're lyft. We're here to help,
are you. They jacked the prices up on New Year's,
the second, you know, most drinking holiday of the year.
(09:05):
I think it's blackout Wednesday, New Year's and then Saint
Patty's Day. Right, they jacked the prices up so high
they wanted you to drive drunk, Like, yeah, come on,
get in the car, kill that family afore do it?
You gotta get home. What are you going to spend
one hundred and thirty bucks on an uber to get
thirty minutes down the road. Now you can do it.
Get in the car, you can do it. Uber's got
(09:26):
to be working with the cops, now, you know what
I mean? Like, I don't know. I just I hope.
I hope twenty twenty five gets better, I really do,
you know? Like I just I feel like we're gonna
get greedier and more dumb, Like the even the new
generation of babies. It's it's weird sounding that like they
(09:50):
just had Uh what was it was millennials Gen z
jen Alpha, and the new generation from twenty twenty five
to twenty thirty nine is going to be called Generation Beta.
Uh Yeah, it's just gonna be a bunch of generational bitches?
Did Generation beta future looks bright? That's gonna suck, man,
(10:17):
But at least I can't bully each other in middle school,
you know what I mean? Oh yeah, dude, you're you're
a beta beta cock dude. Yeah, yeah, well we all are.
We're Generation Beta. I don't know, like who's coming up
with those names. It could be like Generation Hopeful, you know,
Generation Hope, a new Hope. I haven't heard that name
(10:41):
in a long time. Sorry for the bad Star Wars accent. Anyway,
We're just we're getting greedier, We're getting dumber. Like even Netflix,
hold on, I got to pull this up. Netflix is
starting to cater to stupid people. They're like making TV
shows that you can just play in the background because
they know you're not paying attention. You don't have the
span to pay attention anyway. Netflix executives tell screenwriters to
(11:04):
have characters announce what they're doing so viewers who have
a program on in the background can follow along. They
also have thousands of micro genres, including casual viewing, which
is used for movies slash TV that go down best
when you're not paying attention. They're just making shitty stuff
that's what they're doing. Dude. Yeah, these fuckers aren't paying
(11:27):
attention anyway. They're trying to, you know, work five jobs.
But still you know, they have the attention span of
a goldfish. So they got to have either subway surfers
under their video on TikTok that they're watching. Or we'll
just put some terrible, terrible TV show on in the
background so that they can have it on at work.
We can still have the viewership and they can get
(11:49):
on with their date. They don't care anywhere. Characters have
to announce what they're doing in the TV show so
that you don't have to pay attention. Hey, I'm walking
into the other room to set up the next scene. Stupid,
We're getting dumber, dude, getting greedier too. Like Meta and
Instagram announced that they plan to add tons of AI
(12:15):
generated users to Instagram and Facebook. They'll have bios, profile
pictures and can share content. Why Why so that we
don't actually have to interact with other human beings ever. Again,
you're gonna feel real stupid if you're arguing with robots
on the internet. I mean you already are, you know,
(12:37):
nine times out of ten, if somebody like if there's
a news story, and it's just like the craziest, most racist,
divisive thing that you've ever read your entire life. Ninety
percent of the time it's a bot. The other ten
percent is just like that ten percent of human being
that has bought into just staying on the Internet and
(13:00):
watching the news, so their brain just is basically schizophrenic
at this point. That's what it is now. Oh dude, Yeah,
have you heard of the dead Internet theory, where like,
the Internet's not actually free with like living people anymore.
You're just sitting in an echo chamber of your own thoughts,
your own content that you like in bots are disagreeing
(13:22):
or disagreeing with you to make you angry. Maybe, I
don't know. I hope it gets better. You want to
know what the good news is though? Notre Dame beat Uga, Baby,
I love that Notre Dame finally beat an SEC team.
Speaker 3 (13:40):
Well, the Georgia had their backup quarterback.
Speaker 2 (13:43):
Yeah, Notre Dame was missing half its defensive studs, okay,
and Uga was Uga fans were talking a whole bunch
of shit. You Notre Dame stinks man Gunner Gunner Stockton, Dude,
he's the truth. We would whoop you Oh dude, we're
gonna handle you. You guys, you're not gonna be able
to do anything. Notre Dame they wont. Let's hope they
(14:06):
can keep it going against Penn State. Notre Dame might
win a national championship. Wow, it's gonna be awesome. So
I am gonna be absolutely plastered for that game tomorrow.
Oh man, come on, come on, Notre Dame. Just make
it to the Natty, you know, and then then get
(14:26):
embarrassed by Ohio State because Ohio State is just way
too good. So hopefully, you know, maybe Matthew McConaughey can
I don't know, do some kind of hippie magic nonsense
to have Texas beat Ohio State somehow. I don't. I
don't know. All right, it's gonna get better, you know,
it's gonna get better. I got got some shows coming up.
(14:51):
I'm gonna be in New York at the Whiskey Seller
this Sunday shows at seven point thirty. If you're in
New York, you're not come by that. And then January
twenty second, I'm in Wilson, North Carolina at brew Masters.
Also shout out to the improv I got to open
(15:13):
up for Reggie Conquests this past weekend. Shout out to
him and his feature Jonas Jannell. They were hilarious. Go
go find them on social media, go follow them. They're hilarious.
All right, let's get into your headline of the week.
(15:36):
I've been talking long enough. I gotta get on with
my busy, very busy day. I was playing call duty
with my buddies yesterday, you know, just being unemployed. I
was playing video games at eleven thirty and I was like, hey,
I gotta you know, I got like one or two
games left. I gotta do some stuff. And they go,
(15:56):
what do you have to do? And I was like,
I gotta go buy some white bulbs, and I just
I got. I got clowned for a good forty five
minutes about that. They're like, you gotta go get white bulbs,
just ordering bros Like, well, I gotta gotta make sure
they're the right ones. And that's that's my chore for
the day, is get some white bulbs. So you know,
just you gotta do what you gotta do. You know,
(16:18):
like getting white bulbs is it's tough sometimes anyway. All right,
here is your headline of the week. Apple has agreed
to pay ninety five million dollars to set a lawsuit
accusing Siri of eves dropping on people. Yeah, we know,
we know Siries listening all the time. That's how like,
you know, she just pops up when you're like, hey,
(16:38):
I don't want my phone to go off. So I'm
not gonna say it, but yeah, the robot's listening all
the time. Is it some secret conspiracy to just track
all people with iPhones so that they can know what
we're doing at all times and make sure we're not
uprising against the government. No, probably not.
Speaker 3 (16:58):
They probably just want, you know, us to buy shit.
Speaker 2 (17:02):
That's probably what it is. Just curating our algorithm so
that we see more of the things that we want,
we buy them. We make the people that are super
rich a lot more money. Like I was just talking
about light bulbs.
Speaker 3 (17:14):
I guarantee you as soon as I pull up Instagram,
it's gonna be light bulbs.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Let's let's see what the first ad that I get
on Instagram is. Let's refresh, let's see what we got.
I'm getting no advertisements. Well, this is not doing what
(17:38):
I thought it was going to be doing. Show me
an advertisement, Instagram. I'm just seeing content that I like
old baseball highlights and stand up clips and cats. Okay,
maybe it's not listening. Maybe I'm not gonna get any
money out of this ninety five million dollars lawsuit. Also,
ninety five million dollars. How many how many people do
(17:59):
how many people in the US have iPhones? Let's do
some quick math right here, over one hundred and fifty million. Okay,
so let's do one hundred and fifty million divided by
ninety five million. If you want to claim to get
(18:28):
some money in this lawsuit, you're gonna get a dollar
and fifty eight cents. Hey, you know you stole all
my data and made me spend an extra couple hundred bucks.
But hey, we'll call it even. You give me a
dollar and a half, we'll be five. That's crazy that
they can get away with that. I should be able
to get at least one thousand bucks. Back, man, Is
(18:49):
that how that works? No, that's not how that works.
All right, I'm tired of talking. Happy New Year, twenty
twenty five is gonna be great. It's gonna be great.
It's gonna be a tremendous, tremendous year. We're gonna have
the Gulf of America. Okay, I can't believe, he says,
some of the ship, he says. Anyway, it's gonna be
(19:11):
a great year. Remember, don't don't do shit in January. Okay,
take it easy. It's gonna be a long year. You're
gonna need to relax, Okay, and you're not gonna be
able to relax when the sun comes out because you're
gonna want to do stuff. So right now, when it's cold,
we got this cold front coming in on the East coast.
There's gonna be some snow in some places. Just relax,
(19:33):
don't worry about getting to the gym. Okay, you're gonna
hurt yourself. Hi, enjoy the rest of your week. I'll
talk to you next year.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
So money for money for money for go, money for
Speaking that that should not have made it to the
rest of us.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
This is inside thoughts. Check check check. Welcome back to
inside thoughts. Hope you are enjoying your life. Sorry I
took the week off. I'm being lazy, man, But guess what,
this is the time to do it. It's cold, stay inside,
(00:31):
eat the food that you like, get a little chubby.
It's okay, it's wintertime. This one. You're supposed to do it. Everybody,
You're like, no, New Year's resolution. I gotta I gotta
do all the things.
Speaker 1 (00:43):
Man.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
You want to go to the gym as the same
time as everybody's going to gym. No tank December, January,
maybe even a little bit of February off. Get back
into it when it starts getting a little warmer. You're
gonna like being outside more. There's gonna be less people
in the gym, less people jogging on the side of
(01:04):
the street. It's gonna be nice. That's all you gotta do.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
No, I'm January first going to the gem well, you know,
and be a little hungover. January first, maybe maybe January second. Yeah,
I'll go January second. Everybody's in the gym. Bro it sucks.
It's not fun. It's cold outside. Don't go to the gym.
(01:29):
Don't get in your car.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
I know a lot of you don't have the push
to start warm up your car. It's gonna be cold
when you get in there. Don't do that. Stay inside, binge.
Some stuff to watch on some good Netflix documentaries right now.
Been watching Turning Point, the Adam Bomb, the Cold War
(01:52):
US Russia. Very interesting stuff. Long episodes, hour long, nine episodes.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
It's Goodry Springer documentary just dropped.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
There's gonna be a bunch of good ones. Stay inside,
watch TV. Eat food that makes you happy. Okay, because
it's getting dark, it's cold, your body feels sad. The
sun's not here. Okay, so just you know, don't fight it.
I gotta go get my endorphins from the gym. No, No,
don't do that. You think the caveman, the cavemen way
(02:24):
back in time, we're doing that in the wintertime. Think
the Native Americans were doing that. No, they were staying
in their caves, in their tps, getting fat for the
winter months so that they stayed warm. That's what you
need to be doing. Don't buy into all this Instagram propaganda.
(02:45):
You need to get your thumberbod. Now everybolace wearing baggy clothes,
be fat. It's fine. Work your way in, do some
push ups at home if you need to. You know
what I mean. No, dude, no dude, not buying that.
I gotta wake up five am, run down the street
with my little reflector vest on so everybody knows. Don't
come in my waye bro, I'm a unit, okay, David Goggins,
(03:09):
Nobody wants to hang out with you. You're being a weirdo.
All right, Just relax on. I gotta gotta turn this
off real quick. Sorry, the cat turned on. It's automatic toy,
so I don't have to play with it. I've been
playing with the cat a lot. Also, just been eating food,
(03:31):
watching TV, getting fat. We've been watching so much TV, man.
I love watching the commercials in between the shows, because, yeah,
I'm a poor piece of shit. I'm not paying for
the upgraded version. It used to be free. And then
they're like, there's too many people not watching commercials. What's
jack the price up? You can pay for the no
(03:53):
commercial premium, But if you want to keep that stuff
that you were normally havn't at that price, guess what
you're gonna watch commercials. So guess what I'm doing watching commercials.
There's a lot of dating commercials right now, like an
insane frequency of them. And it's Match dot com, it's Hinge,
it's tender bumble. Don't have any commercials because you know
(04:14):
they know that one's not gonna work. But they're all there.
You want to know why because all those dating sites,
they know what time it is, they know it's dark,
they know it's cold, they know you're alone, you're watching TV.
You're getting fat. Hey, Match dot com is here for you.
It's evil. It's evil. They're trying to take advantage of you.
(04:37):
They're praying on you, and that always how commercials work
and advertising guys, it's thing.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Yeah, but guess what. I don't like seeing it. It's evil.
It's making people more sad.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
It's making people want to go run outside at five
am with the reflector vest so that they don't get fat.
Maybe somebody will love them if they're not a little
extra chubby. It's winter time. Relax, don't be attacking people.
Match dot com, Hinge, leave alone. Okay, it's wintertime. Just relax,
(05:10):
take some time, move a little slower. We're not doing shit,
it's gonna be okay, we'll start warming up. It'll be fine.
I gotta go run at five am. Guess what, You're
not gonna see some black eyes. You're gonna break your ankle.
That's a big hospital bill, okay, and then you're gonna
get fat anyway. Plus you gotta bill. You're mad that
(05:31):
you gotta bill, and you're frustrated that you can't move. Okay.
Nobody's gonna love you with a broken ankle. Okay, you're
just gonna see all those match dot com commercials going
Nobody loves me. You're gonna go into even a deeper depression.
All you gotta do. It's just nothing over the winter.
Stop watching those evil commercials. Most commercials are evil though,
(05:53):
like uh they got like all the dating website commercials
going on now. But the only other type of commercial
that plays more frequently than those right now or the
insurance commercials. Those insurance commercials are insane, like they all
have like their way of scaring you into get insurance
or bullying you to get insurance. Like Geico, they brought
(06:16):
back the Caveman kids. If you don't remember the early
two thousands, Geico so easy to use, or Geico dot
Com so easy to use. Even a caveman can do it.
They're bullying this guy now they're bringing him back. Younger
people don't understand the loar of the caveman, so it
just looks like they're bullying a caveman, a low IQ
(06:36):
human being, like, hey, this guy's retarded. You don't have Geico.
That's how you're selling insurance, making fun of dumb people. Okay.
All State they just act like the mafia. Hey, I Mayheim,
and if you don't have all State, you're not gonna
be able to protect yourself like Mayhem, like me, you
(06:58):
better get it. Your house is gonna burned down. Where
they walk up and they're like, yeah, you're in good
hands all State, get us or else Mayhem's gonna come back.
That's extortion, Okay, that's what they're doing. And then State
Farm they're just attacking, you know, your insecurities. They just
got all the cool people like hey, Patrick Mahomes, Andy Reid.
Speaker 3 (07:21):
They're reading chicken nuggies together. Jake from State Farm, he
looks pretty cool. Used to be a goofy looking insurance guy.
Now he's super cool looking. If you don't have State farmed.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
You're not cool. They're like feeding on your high school insecurity.
I want to be a popular kid. Well, you better
get state farmed. Pat Mahomes has it the devil himself.
I don't know. I'm sorry, I'm being negative. Maybe the
New Year will be better. Twenty twenty five will be better.
(07:53):
Maybe it will be I don't know. Do you see
what Trump said. We're gonna change the Gulf of Mexico's
name to the Gulf of America. It's a great name
and actually a lot more correct. The just go it
off script. We're gonna take Greenland, We're gonna invade Canada.
(08:17):
We're taking back to Panama Canal, and we have the
Gulf of America. Twenty twenty five might be better, you never know,
not sure, but it could be. You know. Do you
have a good New Year? I had a good New Year.
New Year's was fun, you know, did the show. Shout
out to Pete Lee. He was cool, It was cool,
(08:40):
got home safely, you know, enjoyed myself, did what I
had to do. I just everybody's getting greedy. Man. Do
you see uber prices on New Year's that that should
be illegal. We're uber, We're lyft. We're here to help,
are you. They jacked the prices up on New Year's,
the second, you know, most drinking holiday of the year.
(09:05):
I think it's blackout Wednesday, New Year's and then Saint
Patty's Day. Right, they jacked the prices up so high
they wanted you to drive drunk, Like, yeah, come on,
get in the car, kill that family afore do it?
You gotta get home. What are you going to spend
one hundred and thirty bucks on an uber to get
thirty minutes down the road. Now you can do it.
Get in the car, you can do it. Uber's got
(09:26):
to be working with the cops, now, you know what
I mean? Like, I don't know. I just I hope.
I hope twenty twenty five gets better, I really do,
you know? Like I just I feel like we're gonna
get greedier and more dumb, Like the even the new
generation of babies. It's it's weird sounding that like they
(09:50):
just had Uh what was it was millennials Gen z
jen Alpha, and the new generation from twenty twenty five
to twenty thirty nine is going to be called Generation Beta.
Uh Yeah, it's just gonna be a bunch of generational bitches?
Did Generation beta future looks bright? That's gonna suck, man,
(10:17):
But at least I can't bully each other in middle school,
you know what I mean? Oh yeah, dude, you're you're
a beta beta cock dude. Yeah, yeah, well we all are.
We're Generation Beta. I don't know, like who's coming up
with those names. It could be like Generation Hopeful, you know,
Generation Hope, a new Hope. I haven't heard that name
(10:41):
in a long time. Sorry for the bad Star Wars accent. Anyway,
We're just we're getting greedier, We're getting dumber. Like even Netflix,
hold on, I got to pull this up. Netflix is
starting to cater to stupid people. They're like making TV
shows that you can just play in the background because
they know you're not paying attention. You don't have the
span to pay attention anyway. Netflix executives tell screenwriters to
(11:04):
have characters announce what they're doing so viewers who have
a program on in the background can follow along. They
also have thousands of micro genres, including casual viewing, which
is used for movies slash TV that go down best
when you're not paying attention. They're just making shitty stuff
that's what they're doing. Dude. Yeah, these fuckers aren't paying
(11:27):
attention anyway. They're trying to, you know, work five jobs.
But still you know, they have the attention span of
a goldfish. So they got to have either subway surfers
under their video on TikTok that they're watching. Or we'll
just put some terrible, terrible TV show on in the
background so that they can have it on at work.
We can still have the viewership and they can get
(11:49):
on with their date. They don't care anywhere. Characters have
to announce what they're doing in the TV show so
that you don't have to pay attention. Hey, I'm walking
into the other room to set up the next scene. Stupid,
We're getting dumber, dude, getting greedier too. Like Meta and
Instagram announced that they plan to add tons of AI
(12:15):
generated users to Instagram and Facebook. They'll have bios, profile
pictures and can share content. Why Why so that we
don't actually have to interact with other human beings ever. Again,
you're gonna feel real stupid if you're arguing with robots
on the internet. I mean you already are, you know,
(12:37):
nine times out of ten, if somebody like if there's
a news story, and it's just like the craziest, most racist,
divisive thing that you've ever read your entire life. Ninety
percent of the time it's a bot. The other ten
percent is just like that ten percent of human being
that has bought into just staying on the Internet and
(13:00):
watching the news, so their brain just is basically schizophrenic
at this point. That's what it is now. Oh dude, Yeah,
have you heard of the dead Internet theory, where like,
the Internet's not actually free with like living people anymore.
You're just sitting in an echo chamber of your own thoughts,
your own content that you like in bots are disagreeing
(13:22):
or disagreeing with you to make you angry. Maybe, I
don't know. I hope it gets better. You want to
know what the good news is though? Notre Dame beat Uga, Baby,
I love that Notre Dame finally beat an SEC team.
Speaker 3 (13:40):
Well, the Georgia had their backup quarterback.
Speaker 2 (13:43):
Yeah, Notre Dame was missing half its defensive studs, okay,
and Uga was Uga fans were talking a whole bunch
of shit. You Notre Dame stinks man Gunner Gunner Stockton, Dude,
he's the truth. We would whoop you Oh dude, we're
gonna handle you. You guys, you're not gonna be able
to do anything. Notre Dame they wont. Let's hope they
(14:06):
can keep it going against Penn State. Notre Dame might
win a national championship. Wow, it's gonna be awesome. So
I am gonna be absolutely plastered for that game tomorrow.
Oh man, come on, come on, Notre Dame. Just make
it to the Natty, you know, and then then get
(14:26):
embarrassed by Ohio State because Ohio State is just way
too good. So hopefully, you know, maybe Matthew McConaughey can
I don't know, do some kind of hippie magic nonsense
to have Texas beat Ohio State somehow. I don't. I
don't know. All right, it's gonna get better, you know,
it's gonna get better. I got got some shows coming up.
(14:51):
I'm gonna be in New York at the Whiskey Seller
this Sunday shows at seven point thirty. If you're in
New York, you're not come by that. And then January
twenty second, I'm in Wilson, North Carolina at brew Masters.
Also shout out to the improv I got to open
(15:13):
up for Reggie Conquests this past weekend. Shout out to
him and his feature Jonas Jannell. They were hilarious. Go
go find them on social media, go follow them. They're hilarious.
All right, let's get into your headline of the week.
(15:36):
I've been talking long enough. I gotta get on with
my busy, very busy day. I was playing call duty
with my buddies yesterday, you know, just being unemployed. I
was playing video games at eleven thirty and I was like, hey,
I gotta you know, I got like one or two
games left. I gotta do some stuff. And they go,
(15:56):
what do you have to do? And I was like,
I gotta go buy some white bulbs, and I just
I got. I got clowned for a good forty five
minutes about that. They're like, you gotta go get white bulbs,
just ordering bros Like, well, I gotta gotta make sure
they're the right ones. And that's that's my chore for
the day, is get some white bulbs. So you know,
just you gotta do what you gotta do. You know,
(16:18):
like getting white bulbs is it's tough sometimes anyway. All right,
here is your headline of the week. Apple has agreed
to pay ninety five million dollars to set a lawsuit
accusing Siri of eves dropping on people. Yeah, we know,
we know Siries listening all the time. That's how like,
you know, she just pops up when you're like, hey,
(16:38):
I don't want my phone to go off. So I'm
not gonna say it, but yeah, the robot's listening all
the time. Is it some secret conspiracy to just track
all people with iPhones so that they can know what
we're doing at all times and make sure we're not
uprising against the government. No, probably not.
Speaker 3 (16:58):
They probably just want, you know, us to buy shit.
Speaker 2 (17:02):
That's probably what it is. Just curating our algorithm so
that we see more of the things that we want,
we buy them. We make the people that are super
rich a lot more money. Like I was just talking
about light bulbs.
Speaker 3 (17:14):
I guarantee you as soon as I pull up Instagram,
it's gonna be light bulbs.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Let's let's see what the first ad that I get
on Instagram is. Let's refresh, let's see what we got.
I'm getting no advertisements. Well, this is not doing what
(17:38):
I thought it was going to be doing. Show me
an advertisement, Instagram. I'm just seeing content that I like
old baseball highlights and stand up clips and cats. Okay,
maybe it's not listening. Maybe I'm not gonna get any
money out of this ninety five million dollars lawsuit. Also,
ninety five million dollars. How many how many people do
(17:59):
how many people in the US have iPhones? Let's do
some quick math right here, over one hundred and fifty million. Okay,
so let's do one hundred and fifty million divided by
ninety five million. If you want to claim to get
(18:28):
some money in this lawsuit, you're gonna get a dollar
and fifty eight cents. Hey, you know you stole all
my data and made me spend an extra couple hundred bucks.
But hey, we'll call it even. You give me a
dollar and a half, we'll be five. That's crazy that
they can get away with that. I should be able
to get at least one thousand bucks. Back, man, Is
(18:49):
that how that works? No, that's not how that works.
All right, I'm tired of talking. Happy New Year, twenty
twenty five is gonna be great. It's gonna be great.
It's gonna be a tremendous, tremendous year. We're gonna have
the Gulf of America. Okay, I can't believe, he says,
some of the ship, he says. Anyway, it's gonna be
(19:11):
a great year. Remember, don't don't do shit in January. Okay,
take it easy. It's gonna be a long year. You're
gonna need to relax, Okay, and you're not gonna be
able to relax when the sun comes out because you're
gonna want to do stuff. So right now, when it's cold,
we got this cold front coming in on the East coast.
There's gonna be some snow in some places. Just relax,
(19:33):
don't worry about getting to the gym. Okay, you're gonna
hurt yourself. Hi, enjoy the rest of your week. I'll
talk to you next year.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
So money for money for money for go, money for
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