EP 8 ROSCOE FORMER VIOLENT FELON SPEAKS on RESTORING HIS COMMUNITY

Rocoe Wallace a former gang member and felon from Omaha, speaks on how he is giving back, what he has learned and how we can all help fix it. Black Women and their distrust. Karly was accpeted in this culture.

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Mhm, baking faces and my thoughtsto me lie angel faces on my watch
to see the side unless I knewthat at a fly and loving this version
of me. Some episodes previously recorded. We are here today with Roscoe and

(00:23):
Hello, Roscoe, how you doing? Thank you for coming in today?
Happy new year. Uh go aheadand give us a little bit I met
Roscoe. Well I'll let you.I'll let you tell everybody how how you
met me and your impression of whenyou met me. Lord. First,

(00:44):
I get to tell you guys alittle bit about well who I am and
a little bit about me briefly.My name's Roscie Wallace, born and raised
in north Omahall. I uh havea little bit of lived lived experience,
if you want to call it that. Uh just had affiliation with gangs,
drugs, violence, come from inparvish home, all the same dynamics you

(01:11):
hear a lot from young black males. I lost my son uh north omb
Hall while I was incarcerated in theFEDS federal prison and didn't really you know,
still haven't properly, if there's sucha way grieved. And so I've

(01:38):
been on a journey to try toget answers some I've gotten and some I
haven't. And but I really kindof did what a lot of parents have
done in North omb Hall. It'sjust take it to the chin. And
you know, I happened to meetthis fiery red head in a three sixty

(02:00):
meeting and uh she wanted answers abouther daughter, and so I want to
I want to take it back.So that day, because you you've been
going to three sixty meetings for awhile, so you were a veteran there.
You knew how it worked and whathappened. And then this random meeting,

(02:21):
they're going around the room and thendo you remember when I stood up?
Do you remember any of that?Like, yeah, I remember you.
You know it was you were talkingabout how you really didn't understand,
you know, how we were asa community, you know, allowing things
to happen. You talked about thesilence, you know, everybody you know

(02:46):
taking a hush mouth, you know, that loyalty thing in the community.
And you talked about uh, waysthat you know, you could try to
support the community with efforts for youngmen young ladies. I remember that,
which wasn't real receptive to a lotof participants there, because I don't think

(03:10):
that they actually heard you clearly,and I felt that I did, and
what I thought they heard, andsome I talked to later confirmed it was
that here's this white lady coming downNorth omahall don't know, squad, that's
normally the normal thing, but shelost her daughter down here, and she

(03:34):
want us all to just focus juston her daughter. Actually I wanted the
answers, but yeah, absolutely,But what I heard was I heard a
mother who happened to be white thatmaybe, you know, could lead to
charge and teach us, some ofus in the community, how we could

(03:57):
have that same determination about ours.And the reason I say that is,
you know, I'm from the urbancommunity, and you know, we have
learned not to trust outside of thecommunity. So that attributes to a lot
of that silence, because you're almosttrained in the community that if you speak
on something, you know what's goingto come back will be worse. And

(04:20):
the thing about it is a lotof parents have taken those losses and said,
hey, this is the circumstance,this is where I'm living, this
is what's going on, the gangs, all this different stuff. So my
child's just a casualty and nobody speakingon it and That was one of the
things that I had to convey toyou is that it wasn't personal in that

(04:45):
respect for Carly, that nobody wasspeaking. It's cultural, it's the conditions,
and it's been that way for years. But what I've seen in you,
and one of the reasons I supportyou because I know you're not the
race stuff my daughter's white. Thatwe're not on that. What we're on
is how do we empower parents thecommunity to basically say no, this is

(05:13):
not acceptable, regardless of it's Carly, my son, Marcus, and so
many others out there. And that'swhat I heard. How I mean,
you guys, anybody can be quietabout their kid, but I wasn't going
to be quiet about mine and everybodyand how how people can I don't understand.
I mean, all bets are offwhen you take my kid's life like

(05:36):
that's I'm not going to support akiller by being silent. And I know,
you know, you say it's culturalor it's generational trauma, and that's
just what they do or what they'retaught. But you know, my my
daughter trusted the people that invited herto that party, and for her to

(05:57):
have that trust that someone would haveher back and for them to not have
her back when at the most crucialmoment in the world, that's just you're
no friend of hers. And I'vebeen saying that from the beginning, and
I know that, I know youhave said a couple of times like,

(06:18):
man, you know she's out herescreaming. Maybe we should absolutely, But
see, this is the thing.When we talk about those conditions, they
have no color. Were talking poverty, you know that has no color exactly.
But see that's the thing. Evenif you go back to the to
the mob, you know that wasconditions. You know, people didn't speak,

(06:43):
and what happened violence Chicago all thosedays, what happened. So you
lose people by not and that's thething we have to learn. You will
never have control over your communities beingsilent, right, that's my point.
So it has nothing to do withrace, cultural It's what happens in pockets

(07:06):
of poverty, of suffering, differentthings that happen, and then people start
to normalize it. An educated manas myself today can admit that that I
have taken it on the chin likeso many others. And I know I
can't bring my son back. Youcan't bring Carly back. But if we

(07:26):
are loud enough, how many otherkids will we save in their name right
just by being parents as vocal well, and especially when it's seemingly the same
core group of guys, they keeparresting the same guys, the same troublemakers,
the same shooters. If it's acore group of ten people, you

(07:48):
know, make them sit down andfigure it out. And if they can't
figure it out, they can sitout longer. But we can't just keep
street release and we can't just keepsaying, oh, these community program programs
that don't lock, people that don'thave a locked facility. And it starts
with the juveniles because you know,as you know, Carly's killers were raised

(08:11):
in the juvenile system that we havenow and you're you're helping trying to help
juveniles. Yeah, it's you know, one of the things about it.
I just believe that all hands shouldbe on deck. It's one of the
reasons we go to the commissioner meetingsand everything is to advocate, you know,

(08:33):
bringing all those entities that's making thedecisions into the same room. That's
what the problem is. You know, we you know, to even bring
up nine eleven on a national level, that was admitted that the FIZZ wasn't
sharing with the state. The statewasn't sharing with the fears. It happened
in those bureaucratic circles. But itdoes the community no justice when they're not

(08:58):
sharing the DA. He's not sharinglaw enforcement in everybody's point fingers probation.
So absolutely, so what what what? What you know? And you know
what I'm about about restorative justice?And you know, I know people probably
heard of before. It's not softon crime, it's smart actually on crime.

(09:18):
Because restorative justice at its core andits beginning is and didn't that come
from Native American or tribal? Yes, I give it. It was tribal
and indigenous in its core. Andwhat it what it, what it solved
was uh like right now, oursystem is predicated on a breach of law,

(09:41):
okay, So when a law isbroken, we're asking a question,
Okay, what law is broken andhow we're gonna punish you? Okay.
So restorative justice says what harm you'vedone and how can you repair it?
So when we're talking that language,the repairing can be time, it can

(10:03):
be lengthy time because what restorative justicedo is victim centered. Our system today
has a ninety eight point five soundlike a radio station, ninety eight point
five plead bargain rate. All right, that's how much the District Attorney's office
all over the country they're having thatmany plead bargains. So that means that

(10:28):
there's a lot of deals that's beingmade. I can guarantee you ninety three
percent of those deals the victiming inthe room. Right, So how are
we tough on crime in that respect? The toughness is, as you know,
this young man has signed up toget in front of you. Now,
to me, that's tough. Idon't even want to be in front

(10:48):
of you right now because he's joking. But no, you're fiery, and
I'm just saying, you're gonna havesome questions for this young man. He
wasn't the shooter, and and weset this mediation up and we can talk
about that later. But I justwant to make the point that for someone
to have to sit in front ofsomebody and their family, you hear what

(11:11):
I'm saying, and their family haveto hear, you know, And then
on top of that, what areyou gonna do about what you've done?
See, time is just time,and that's why we have this big recidivism
because you're not actually holding people accountable, hold them accountable to the victim.
Now we know we can't in somesituations, you can't bring a person back.

(11:35):
So what tribes did back then,this is how they settled disputes.
They knew it just couldn't be abreach of something because restorative justice is based
on relationships. These tribes have relationships, These gangs have relationships. It's even
what we're teaching the gangs right nowat Radius and Made Mediation and it's working,

(11:56):
is that you are who you arein your space. But you can't
just go full throttle at each other. We have to have a table where
we could talk. Let's have organizedcrime. No, no, we start
there, we start being saying thatwe can't be barbaric and go back and
forth, back and forth because weboth lose. Tribes understood this, so

(12:18):
they said, okay, what harmwas done. Somebody had to say,
okay, how you're gonna fix it, and that's gonna do more for the
community. That's where you talked aboutthe village here is that Okay, they
solved it, not by somebody goingdoing time. You don't even hear about
that no more. And the timethey get is and even the time they
really get and the victim sits backand feel the way they continue to feel

(12:41):
because they get no answers. Yeah, the victim I'm finding out. You
know, first of all, wehave no say so unless it's you know,
in a court of law because it'sa civil unless you have an attorney,
you know, a a prosecutor thatdoes include you, which ours does.
But it's still at the end ofthe day, and not my call

(13:03):
because it's the state versus or thecounty versus. So it's not my call.
And went through and I went througha few things. But at the
same time, we have it alittle better in with the situation that we
had with Tyvell Lampkin Davis, becauseI wasn't included, even though I didn't

(13:26):
really have a say so, betterthan you know, my friend Lisa,
who's sister lost her son and theirdistrict attorney didn't even tell them about the
police. But we took it inour own hands. I grabbed no.
I mean the court right, butthe court never encourages is what I'm saying.

(13:46):
They have never encouraged that, sowe would have never we would never
have gotten to this moment where youwould have an opportunity to to put questions
in front of him. He hasa right to answer him or not just
why you know we talked to himin that ram because there's gonna be tough
questions. Well, let me fillpeople in. So we're speaking about for

(14:11):
Carly's case, we have currently there'sthree people who have charges. There's two
more people out there that shot her, and we are really really hoping that
witnesses speak up because there's people outthere who know who who those people are.
That said one of the people whowas charged, Tylor Lampkin. Davis,

(14:33):
was sentenced and he got five yearsprobation. During that time before the
sentencing and during I guess negotiations orthe court case, his attorney suggested mediation
because he wanted to talk to me. I was told at first that was

(14:56):
up to me, and then inthe end it wasn't up to me,
but it was still on the table. Now. That said, when he's
given five years probation, technically hedoesn't have to say anything anymore because he
already got his sentence and he couldjust you know, go off in the
wind and screw you. So Roscoehappened to know this family and talk to

(15:22):
them and then so we're working ondoing this, this mediation and he is,
by the way, the only onethat was not a felon that's involved
with Carly's case. And the thingabout the mediation is is getting to a
point to where these ladies show theirtheir humility and humanity and uh, even

(15:45):
the capacity to be able to forgive. You know, Uh, Autumn says
some awesome things and held him tosome awesome things and as human beings.
That's that's the spirit of knowing thatwe have to continue to exist. Now
what you're saying in the restorative justicerealm, when we give you these opportunities

(16:11):
and you continue, and it shouldn'tbe a continuance because in some of these
situations, we need to see thatyou really get it. You're talking,
yes, that you get it.Okay, because all this stuff happened.
He wasn't the one pulling any gup, but he he should get it,
learn something. That's what we're sayingas a community, not just you,

(16:34):
And that's what we want to seebecause it's gonna make our communities better.
That's gonna make sure there's no moreMarcus and cards that just pop up all
the time. Well, and he'she's got his own kid, So is
he gonna continue the cycle or ishe gonna make a change, And we
challenge him to do that. Butwhat we're saying is, and what you're
saying is that those opportunities and that'swhy I say we have to data share.

(17:00):
Those different agencies have to be connectedin the decision making process of who
gets what right which they are notcurrently okay. And the community should be
a big part of that because thepeople that you're releasing or locking up are
people from our community. We shouldhave a say if you're letting somebody dangerous

(17:22):
out that we might have a saythat. Hey, then we want to
say if you're taking somebody away,like you said, maybe not a fella,
maybe somebody wronged people wrong. Becausewhen we get into the judgment thing.
Even as parents, man, younever did that. When we got
together, we didn't say whoa wewere the greatest parents ever, but we

(17:42):
damn show don't believe that our kidsshould be murdered. Right. So my
daughter, I don't know, Marcus, but my daughter didn't do any I
mean she all she did was workand then she was kind to everybody that
she knew, and I guess andshe was accepted. She was accepted in

(18:07):
that community at least she thought.But let me throw this at you.
You know how many of our childrenaround the country and Omaha, white,
black, Hispanic Asian that just happenedto be standing or somewhere and catch one

(18:32):
because of And I remember these dayswhen the drive bids was prevalent, and
all the innocent kids and different people, so that innocence just like and it's
a lot of kids that we couldsay, Okay, he was in the
gangs or whatever. What I liketo say is, man, when did
it get a point? You know, because I remember when if kids was

(18:57):
like you know, eighteen nineteen twenty, even especially in car accidents or whatever,
we just grieve like wow, sothey had so much life minus And
so now we're starting to adapt toaccepting thirteen year olds being murdered. So

(19:21):
I'm no, I'm just saying that, you know, we dine kind of
got a little cushion cushion there towhere we're not outraged as we should be.
So I want to look at allthe kids and I make that I
make that firm because I you know, how I am. I love people.

(19:42):
Yeah, so I love all thekids. And uh my thing on
that is we all have to createa better north omahall, South omahall West
Omaha. And that's by communicating andnot leaving any side of the city as
a silo. I remember, youknow what I mean, that's those down

(20:03):
there or that's them out there.You know that's a big thing too that
I really think we have to challenge. We need help, you know,
we need help. So I wantto kind of circle back a little about
your first impressions. I mean,obviously you got your first impression of me,
which was whoa this lady's fired up? Yes, yes, put it

(20:26):
likely. Yes, Hey, thisis a podcast, not radio. We
don't have to be calm. Youcan tell me exactly what you thought.
I know what other people in theroom. I'm serious, you know,
I would tell you know our relationship. We don't just talk on the podcast.
We talk and no, I justseen I just seen some firing you.

(20:47):
I had to check though. I'mtelling you, it's just it's just
a I guess we got to getsome time out of that culture thing of
trust. I was like, youknow, because you before you stick your
nose out where I'm from. Igot to know whatever race you I have,
no we are whatever. But Iheard what everybody else heard. But

(21:07):
I heard what I heard. AndI'm a gussy dude too, so it
ain't like you uh far from me. I say what I say? You
know that? And I think Ilooked over at you in the room too.
I said, I grieve with you. If you want to grieve with
me, come on down here.This is where we're doing it at.
And I just put it out there. It was just an invitation. I
didn't think her crazy. But let'stake a quick break and I'm gonna come

(21:36):
back in just a second. Thisis I'm far from And if you want
to find out more about Carly's storyand some of the things that we touch
on here, go to curly raindot com k A R L y r
a i n dot com. Youcan also donate there. You can find

(21:56):
your reps and write them letters.We encourage you to check it out and
please share her kindness. All right, here we are back with Roscoe.
I was gonna tell you about thissong that so Carly was really, really,
really big into music. I'm intomusic and Carly's genres stretched as far

(22:18):
as mine and maybe even a littlemore, because she would get down deep
into like some of the genres.And anyway, I was listening one day
to a playlist of mine and thissong was on it, and it's a
Dre song, and I have neverheard the song, and I don't know
why it was on my playlist becauseI've never heard it. Because I liked

(22:41):
it, so I would know ifI heard it. But I was crying
in the car because of this song, because certain part of this song and
what it says. Have you everheard the song Bang Bang by Dre?
So I'm gonna play a little bitof it, hopefully can get to the
lyrics. Basically, it's about Dretalking about how young these kids are and

(23:03):
these after hours parties and all hehears is bang bang and it's not even
worth and these kids just they dieearlier and earlier and younger. I listened
a little bit of Dressed Uff,but I don't think I've ever Let's listen
to him a little bit of it. It's just a lot smarter now,
Steve here, I'm in the back. And if it's the same thing and

(23:26):
they ain't changed, niggas still playingjags just a lot smarter Now Steve Niggas
is banging chap times harder. NowNiggas bringing their ass up in the wrong
part of town. But the turnthey call around the canny got a shotgun
and he ain't even strong enough.The jock warning the shot hun niggas got
eight k's Niggas is way pray,get the drake balls back and das niggas

(23:51):
straight shoot it out. Looking niggaswalk by the blast the foot front.
I think they had a tune fortwice as words it takes half the time
to get your home type always soyeah, that that I actually opened it

(24:15):
right to that that lyric right there, that phrase kinda I mean, they're
doing it faster, they're younger,they're getting to the grave faster than we
did. And I guess I startedbawling because those are the type of kids

(24:37):
that killed my daughter, Like thatwas the cusp, and now we're into
even younger kids doing it. Butthat always brings me to I always make
a I guess a joke slash seriouscomment of doesn't anybody watch Friday? Didn't
ever anybody understand that you just fightit out. You don't have to shoot
everybody up. And you do haveto stand up to the bullies, and

(25:00):
you do have to stand up tothe to the troublemakers. Why is it
in there? And nobody listened toyou know. I was told, well,
they don't listen to Dre and Easyand all that anymore. They're on
their own wavelength. It's totally different. No, right now. You know,
you even have a genre of calleddrill and it's just, uh,

(25:26):
most of it come out of aShiraq shy town, and it's uh,
it's built on homicide. It's builton homicide. And it was very unfortunate
because you know, I come upand you know, we had those those
rappers. I thought you said Drake. I was gonna say Drake. No,

(25:47):
Drake. That was on the twothousand and one Chronic album and he
has another, the original Chronic youhave to listen to. It's called Little
Ghetto Boys. And that is thesame thing he's talking about us getting out
of prison. I remember it becauseit showed us they changed from us,

(26:07):
because I'm in the Dre era,you know, and what he was talking
about we was the dudes. Youknow, now we're coming out of prison
on swow we was running the block. But now that little ghetto boy,
now he there, he running itand dre do you know, go through
this rite where he's this dude gettingout and then a little homie shooting and

(26:30):
he was like, damn, youknow, he ready to box him.
He swoll and they ain't there nomore. So, Uh, that's what
I was telling you about as theyget younger, Like right now, they're
younger because they have more access.One of the things that they have different
than the last generation. The lastgeneration was just a little bit solid.

(26:52):
I would say that in organization andbeing able to talk through some things.
That's gone as they're younger, andsome of the you know, some of
the the you know, the topheads are younger. So that means you
have guys that's leading younger, developfront all over none. But but he
got a lot of gunpower behind him. And so that's what I do with

(27:17):
the kids. I don't come inand try to change anything. You know,
I've been that. I don't wantto, you know, I didn't
want no older cat telling me nothingabout my reality. But what I'm doing
is I try to meet a lotof them in that mediation. Just like
with the kids in radius and lettingthem know, hey, yeah, your
different sets and all this here,but you're gonna have to find some common
ground in this because in prison wedo. You're just well, just think

(27:42):
about it. That's where I'm tellingyou restorative justice works because it happens in
prison with Aryan Nation, Blacks,Mexicans, all of them. A lot
of times the guys don't like eachother, but being able to function on
the yard and respect boundaries everything.These kids don't know how to respect boundaries,

(28:03):
and so we we navigate through thosethings. Same way with different gangs.
There's guys in prison that you know, they know that didn't hurts somebody
in their gang. You know,but they but but but but to go
at that guy without getting a certainpermission, Like say, for instance,
you you went into a prison andjust knew of of of of this chick

(28:26):
that did some to your family.Especially in the fairs, it's geographic.
You just can't come in and disruptthe order of a world. It's a
small world, you see what I'msaying. So everybody got to play by
certain rules. So you gotta teachthese kids at that level. And then

(28:48):
if they want to grow away fromthe madness. Let them. But you're
saying, at this chaotic, crazy, non functioning, we're gonna we're gonna
add a little bit of you know, uh uh to this chaos. We're
gonna add a little bit of asensibility. Okay, So I'm gonna be
Devil's advocate, though there's people outhere going no, See, we don't

(29:11):
cater to teenagers. You lock themup, you sit them down, and
you have them figure it out.If there's no accountability to a teenager,
they're just gonna grow in to bea serial killer. Yeah, well,
if the accountability is meeting them wherethey're at, and then then you start
putting the blocks down if you comein, I promise you. It's one

(29:33):
of the reasons why a lot oftherapists and the kids counseling, you know,
to structure to preachy, to unrealisticfor my reality. Just like with
a lot of the kids, youknow, you have to kind of meet
some of them right where they atbecause the first thing they think with me

(29:53):
and you you don't understand Roskie,your old ass average, your old ass
y'all, don't underst staying it ain'tlike and that's what d you know,
But you got a double looking redheadass stupid. But you know, oh
my god, so you gotta youunderstand that there's always that disconnect. It's

(30:18):
always how do you connect? Likewith you one of the things that you
were able to do when we werewe were doing the circles and I was
bringing the kids in on probation,those kids, and we had that conversation
and I was like, Amber,don't see all these kids as those kids
that was in that after hour.And I thought that was a big plus
for you, because I'm telling you, at first when I met you,

(30:38):
I seen some of that. Eventhough you wanted answers, you was kind
of like, it's all of youlike that. I know, I'm gonna
show you different and you've seen it. You've seen the compassion in a young
man, same young man that shootthe ship out of somebody, but you've
seen that young man and how compassion. But that was because you allow Carly

(31:00):
to function. That's what I toldyou. It come out of you,
no matter how you feeling, ifyou let that beautiful spirit of hers.
And I didn't get a chance tomeet her personally, but I've been feeling
her spirits since I've met you.That's when you're not getting in the way,
right, all right. So I'mcircling back a little bit too.
Where are the ogs? Why don'tthe ogs have any control over these young

(31:23):
guys? And are some of theOG's saying now because they know that kids
aren't gonna get in trouble? Hey, you go do this. You ain't
getting in trouble. I just gaveit to you. It's it's like everything
else to trust have to be builtbecause that's how we lost them. So
you ain't no way we're gonna goback preachy, preachy. You gotta meet
them where they're at my point,because they gonna tell you where the hell

(31:47):
was you at. See, someof these kids like get into gangs,
not because they woo I want tobe in a gang. Some of these
kids want to have futures all that, but when they go to school and
all this pressure, you know.So it's almost like I'm being honest,
It's almost like the days back inprison, if you wasn't aligned with something

(32:08):
and you came in there and youwas on your own, you felt that
way. You had to be acertain type of breed like myself to be
able to say this is what I'mdoing and it's scary. You have no
support. But when you when theydo something wrong or they break the law

(32:29):
and there's no consequence to them,that's not a consequence. Oh go to
a group home that isn't locked.That doesn't say anything other than I can
go where I want when I wantso without the consequence. To be able
to sit them down and help thembecome more emotionally intelligent and help them feel
value of worth of themselves, don'twe have to have a locked facility for

(32:52):
that. No, because this isa process. Now if they get out
run from their different things, showedthat they're not because I got a lot
of pros for Radius. It didn'tstart that way, but I do because
I see the vision that they're supportingthe families and they're supporting the kids.

(33:14):
Now, I would definitely like tosee more restorative justice practices within their the
victim impact, you know, theempathy thing. But the main thing is
this. If those kids are gettingall of that without just sending them out
of state and all that right inthe community, We're getting them all the
resources there and they still screw up, then there's another layer to that process.

(33:37):
Now, kid, you have hadsome opportunities. We got a solely
debate if you get another one,but at the risk of many lives.
But see, that's the whole thing. We haven't had anything instructured like that.
Those kids keep getting those opportunities untilthey do hurt somebody. But they

(33:58):
haven't hurt anybody. But the problemis what I'm saying is is that they
should be incarcerated, all right,especially if they just shot people and all
this there, But isn't there isn'tthere a middle building like not prison and
not radius. You haven't earned radiusyet, son, because you we got
that cart into it, but theone in the middle that is actually locked,

(34:22):
and you have to do these thingslike in prison, didn't you have
to do certain things? Yeah?And and I totally agree, even if
it was in the style of aboot camp, right, so you know,
and we talked about the same thing. You know, we're not talking
about throwing the kids away. Whatwe're saying. And we've always said that,
men, you always said that thatwe need the community needs, not

(34:44):
just you or me. The communityneeds to be able to get ahead.
Not just lawyers, not judges,not just prosecutors. They all are part
of the process. But they shouldn'thave the soul discretion of how many chances
these kids. I think the communityshould be in there somewhere because sometimes you

(35:06):
have parents that's telling them, ifyou're let him back out, he's gonna
right. And so we're not givingup on our kids. I'm never gonna
give up on the kids. Butone thing that I've seen is that we
are in certain capacities tapping it risksa little too lightly right, and that's
the that's the thing that's not beingI mean, I've said it before.

(35:30):
A toddler, a child, they'regrowing up. Your job is to teach
him right from wrong. And youknow, just like we talked about,
race is taught, hate is taught. But a kid want needs structure.
That's why babies cry. And thejuvenile system, in my opinion, is

(35:52):
the backup parent when they're not gettingthe parenting at home or the parent can't
do what they need to do becauseobviously now they're in trouble screaming for structure.
Any kid that's doing stuff like that, unless they're a sociopath, is
screaming for some help. So youknow, you have these groups out here

(36:13):
going, well, don't lock themup or put them in shackles. That's
traumatizing. I'm sorry, but ifa kid is shooting at somebody or has
shot someone, they're traumatized already.But let me challenge you on this one.
I'm going to be that advocate.But some of the kids say that,
and it's debatable that they don't haveenough to do. They just have

(36:35):
social media in their phones. I'vechallenged that, and this is what I've
heard back in like what to do. I'm like because I'm still hearing them,
but I'm old fashioned, an oldfashioned, But the old fashioned dude
can tell you we didn't have much. I can almost go back to radio.
No, I ain't that far,y'all don't go there, But I
mean I can go back to Tetra. I can go back to y'all remember

(37:00):
the little the Channis Boo boo boo. I mean, come on, man,
and definitely go back to sagan Un. But I'm just saying, you
know, I could go back towhere you had nothing in the house but
a book, and you better goout there and find some friends, and
y'all better make up some games orsomething. So I don't know what they

(37:20):
exactly mean by they need more todo. So I'm still working on that
one. Maybe huh, could itbe that they're scared to be outside?
It could be and and and andthat that also lays within that generational stuff.
That drive by stuff still had itseffects because I've witnessed grandmothers and no,
you're not going to the park.You know, these people shooting out

(37:42):
here. So you know, wegotta look at that the trauma around that
this was in the United States ofAmerica happening and still happening in some of
the communities. You know, that'sfunny that you said that you're hearing from
the kids. We don't have enoughto do now, I say social media
and I love all video games,but there's a lot of video games that

(38:04):
desensitize shooting. I mean, yousee NTV. The more the more realistic
and sci fi and all the specialeffects, the more real it gets,
you get desensitized to it. Sowhen they see blood, they're like,
you know. The problem is thateven you know, when I was coming
up the SCC or whoever they is, I think that's who they is.

(38:30):
I mean, man, they didnot let nowhere near this stuff, you
know, and and somewhere we youknow, and I'm somewhere in there with
freedom. Yeah, the Federal Commissioncommunications what we can see and what we
can't. Yeah, but you know, I mean at first I see like,

(38:52):
ah man, you know, butwhen cable came, oh man,
and then I think the networks startsto how to challenge them. But I'm
saying, you wasn't getting that onABC or CBS. You're getting a Wizard
of Oz and you didn't get thatwhen I was coming up. Man,
you didn't even get you barely gota kiss and then the tongue came out.

(39:15):
Because I remember when the tongue cameout, I thought it was a
lizard. I was like, ohshit, what was that. So it's
different. These kids are exposed andyou correct. I mean, it is
a desensitizing and also you know,I'm looking at my grand babies and stuff.
I mean, and these little kidsgrabbing phones and doing stuff with them

(39:37):
that I can't do, and andit's like they come out of the womb
prepared for this technology or something wethink about think about. People would like
to argue about, oh, it'snot video games, just like it wasn't
Ozzy if you played them backwards,it was satan But first of all,
I never tried to play music backwards. I don't know who does that,

(39:57):
but I did once just to seeif someone was right. But it literally
is desensitizing them to the victim impact. Because in a video game, you
shoot them, you get a score. In real life you get shot or
and survive, or you shoot someoneand don't get a consequence. You get

(40:20):
like yeah. But this is whatI'm saying about the sec As a grown
man like me and you, wecan decipher that. Man, you can
have a beer and we could justthis would be a love Okay, we
decided not to do darts tonight.All right, let's go bortal combat.
You know, it's the kids that'sthe problem. And we wasn't good about

(40:42):
and especially with that auto theft orgrand theft auto. I'm a little little
Lannie, my little buddy Lannie.I remember coming in on him and man,
he had the music bump and hewas like, you're getting in the
car, bitch. I'm like,who who said that? Right? That
game? I like need I meanthe dude in the car he was with

(41:05):
me. I'm like, hey,yeah, and that's that. And even
if they put an R rated orwhatever, the parents aren't like you.
No, No, they're still gettingaround and we didn't. And that's that.
That's back on us as parents.You can't outsource that to teachers,
law enforcement, counselors and the Maybethose video games should have the victim impact

(41:29):
afterwards they have to watch. Well. The thing is is this as parents,
because there's certain parents that this kidis out there that can't get near
this stuff. So we can't overlookthem there there we need to hide.
No, we don't see enough ofthem quiet. We think they're weird.

(41:50):
Well, and their kids are callednerds or something. Yeah, they're weird.
Yeah, you know they're gonna havesome weird kids. So this takes
me back to that first. Ithink it was the first meeting or the
second that I showed up to atthree sixty when I made a comment and
everyone, not everyone, I'm sorry, a couple ladies got infuriated when I

(42:12):
simply said, let's figure out somethingdifferent for these kids to do. Have
any of them? Do they getto go to like a camp? Yeah?
And holy crap, you would havethought I I'm like, no,
because if they get to go beoutside at a camp, away from the
hood and away from survival where theyjust get to have fun and look at

(42:32):
butterflies. And that isn't how itwas received. But that's because and I
thought, I told you this becausethey have that. What you should have
told them is how do we scaleit? Because they have day camp she's
talking about Yeah, I'm talking aboutovernight. They go away for three days
a week. It's not it's nottake me out and five o'clock bring me

(42:55):
back. But the whole thing.I still didn't see it and away I
still seen it as what can wedo more? It wasn't even just what
you presented in that sentence. Itwas like what more can we do?
And uh, that's a question thatI have obviously all the time in three
sixty what more can we be doing? But you don't want to get me

(43:16):
You didn't want to hear it.Well, I, but you can't stop
coming because of that. You ain'tbeen coming to neither. I don't know
what's sube. I haven't been comingbecause do you want to know? Honestly?
Why? Because that rooms a lotof talk. Well, I support
you, it's a lot of patentpatent people on the back and they don't

(43:40):
want to zoom it, which Idon't understand why. It's kind of like
they don't want the community there.The real you know, the most of
the people that are getting paid,let's be real, they are representatives from
the school district, the representatives fromthis entity, that entity, some some
community groups who've got a grant.But that's why to me and you keep

(44:00):
that's why, you know, AndI say it all the time. And
Willie, you know, I thinkyou respect that now. I said,
I will always come in there andchallenge. The reason I say that is
is because for me to know theAmaha Nebraska and I talked about it earlier,
of having west On my hall here, this and that at least to

(44:22):
have some of these people that Icouldn't even have access to have a conversation
with, the same way with you. You have to utilize those avenues and
utilize them and not disrespectfully, butyou know, respectfully asking questions and challenging
things. Because if you put youin the circle, see, and that's

(44:45):
what happens when certain people like yourself, myself and others, then it really
become plastic. And so it's stillsome reputable people in there, and there's
some people just like you. That'skind of like. And then there's some
people that that are I would saya large majority, but uh, there

(45:06):
are some people that's saying I'm herebecause my boss or whatever think highly of
three sixty and if I wasn't here, he might look a little bit funny
at me or whatever. Yes,I mean, that's everything. But when
you have access to something, andthen let me go back to Omaha,
Nebraska, the Omaha, I know, I have to be real, very
racist, very west, very north, very you can't talk to me,

(45:31):
you know what I mean? Youknow? But but but this is the
three sixty probably the most liberal thingI've ever seen in this thing, man.
And so I'll take people pretending I'lltake that. But if I got
some fiery redhead, that's gonna shakeup some nerves up in there. You
see, I don't run from you. You ever see Nemo the But but

(45:57):
think about it. I'm a rioter, and I don't you know, I
don't I don't care about people's opinion, especially you know, I don't care
about none of that stuff. Ifyou're real and I feel you real,
and we're rolling, then we're gonnaroll to the wheels fall off. So
what I'm telling you is in there. You wouldn't have never met me.
If you didn't roll up in there, I wouldn't have never met you.
And so, but this is whatI'm saying. So I've been to several

(46:22):
and every once in a while Ineed to pop my head back in because
they think they may have gotten ridof me. But I feel like I
get more done on my own.Half of those people in that room I
had either already talked to myself.Yeah, because I go to the source,
I don't necessarily need the group.That's true too, you kind of
have because you have utilized them sources, so you can't say that you haven't

(46:45):
there. But uh, you're right. You kind of moved past a lot
of them and went to the nextbecause your butt took off and I had
to grab on to you because youwent from there, the commissioners, the
here, the there government. Actuallythree sixty was after commission, it was
after chief, it was after sheriff, it was after you know, the
mayor's office. That girl in there, she's I'm sad to say. You

(47:08):
know, we're not done. Youknow you were eyeball couple, you know
what I mean, But we're notdone. You know this year here.
I really believe we're gonna crack somedoors. You know, those those those
those meetings. You know. I'mgonna add my voice to yours. Now,
just this my white daughter here.No, I'm going to advocate for
the northumb Hall community. I'm gonnaspeak for a lot of other parents that

(47:30):
I know, and I've heard them. I heard them. They can't say
it. I've heard a lot ofthem. They want answers. Who is
a lot of them want answers.So you don't think that they don't.
I'm just saying that we have gotkind of condition with okay, if we
don't get it, we don't getit because it's no. But didn't you

(47:51):
tell me that some of them werelike, well, if she can talk,
then maybe I need to start streaming. No, I said that,
I thought you because you want toalways accentuate the negative. I said,
no, I've seen some. I'veseen some. You know. I just
wanted to make sure you come offright to them because I knew they could

(48:12):
be advisaris for you, and Ifelt they felt you. Alicia's one of
them, you know, Jaquela afteryou know what I mean, because you
have to understand these sisters. Theyhave dealt with theirs. True, regardless
what anybody say, they have haddeal with our shit. And then they
have been you know what I mean. That's not to say other races women
have it either, but man,black women have deal with so much trauma

(48:35):
and they didn't they didn't get alot of support from us. So I'm
always gonna be empathetic in that ramand it makes them very very who they
distrust a lot. They distrust alot. And that's why I'm saying,
once you get the vibing and andy'all on that level with one that's a
writer, she gonna ride with you. That's why, like I said,

(48:55):
I don't know Carly's friends that night, but I know sisters, and I
know the ones in North thumb Hall. If they riding or it's pensis a
pocket. If they fucking with you, they fucking with you, you know.
And I don't want them painting thatpicture because I know there's many white
girls and white boys that came Northtoumb Hall and some of my partners and

(49:17):
other partners that uh, you ain'tfinna fuck with them. I like my
white boy Patna Mike Bassett, thefirst dude be like man, this white
boy, you know what I mean, he already knows. He ain't gotta
say nothing, you know, soI don't let him know. So when
you watched videos of Carly, becauseI always say Carly speaks better for herself

(49:40):
and she wouldn't want anyone else todescribe her but her, what is your
what was your thought of watching videosof Carly and her vibe and just after
I because you know, I liketo make people watch videos of her.
What what was your feel for Carly? Because you've told me a few things
my thing, and like I said, I didn't know a lot. And

(50:04):
then you know, I started justseeing just to be honest, you know,
hurt me because I'm looking at youknow, and I really love when
whites and others take on our cultureand not judge us and not you know
what I mean, and those youdon't you know, And even today I'm
just being honest. You find thatfar in between, you know, you

(50:29):
go back and I just speak onit, even from the civil rights you
know. And and this is formy brothers and sisters to know. And
there's whites that have given up theirlives. We know this. There's whites
that then' integrated into the music,came into our culture and embraced it and
loved it. You can't embrace ourculture with our love. You can't love

(50:51):
our culture without loving us. Thatwas the first thing. Just seeing her
creativity and where it came from.That's almost like seeing uh, Elvis Presley.
You know, we know Elvis wasthe man, but we know Elvis
was the man like Larry Bird andthere, but he kicked it in that
culture, right, he wasn't afraidof it. And and we love,

(51:15):
yes, and you love that.That's that's just me speaking from my perspective
when I see you know, becausewe had th old white boys like that
white boy, but it was whiteboy in the way he one of us.
But and because and not because he'sgetting away from who he is.
But you have to understand to feelcomfortable, especially in a culture that that

(51:38):
ain't so quick to embrace you.So you gotta have some qualities about you
too to make them say, hey, you know what I'm saying with her?
You know know what I'm saying withthat person? In general? Something
we have to see something too,And normally it's a realism. Normally it's
just like a and I see thatinner too. I don't see a pretense.

(51:58):
I see, Hey, this iscar Harley, this is who you
got and didn't feel like she hadto put on anything. So to describe
Carly, remember remember this is justsound only. How are you gonna describe
that girl that died on thirty thirtynames to somebody? Oh? Man,
I would say, just a livelyspirit, just so full of light,

(52:24):
so full of light. I wouldsay, adventurous, creative is all over
the place, you know, tellingwhat the hell she would have created in
that realm, and the and theand and one of the biggest things and
don't even know her, but itradiated out all that loving, yeap loving.

(52:51):
I see it in autumn too.I don't see them as just want
to see the bad in somebody.First. I think you wrestle with that
with him and you got you knowwhat I mean. They don't want to
see the bad, you know,and that you know, that is a
beautiful quality. It's just it's gotto be taken care of in this world,
unfortunately, because everybody you know don'tvalue it well. And Carly she

(53:19):
grew up. We we lived insubsidized housing, and she grew up.
She was never she was always mostof her best friends were I would say,

(53:39):
well, no, you know,there's a mixture of everything. But
she she was never you know,judge, uh, prejudice, and she
did. She gravitated to different thingsthat she thought was cool. Even with
religions. She like picked and choosefrom different religions and made it to Carly

(54:00):
religion whatever she believed. But itwas the same thing with cultural things.
She would get those are they bonnetsfor hair? Because your hair gets tangled
in the middle of the night.And then someone said, well, you
can't wear that, you're a whitegirl. And I'm like, I got
long crowers hair. Why couldn't Iwear Why can't Carly wear one? What?

(54:22):
And then she did that edging withher flyaways, which I cannot do,
by the way, that's like anart form. But she would just
tell me Mom, She's like,you just do whatever you want to do.
I mean that's how she did.You know. Did she ever talk
about like having beauty shops? Oh? She was saving for That's why she

(54:45):
was working all the time. Shewanted to buy a house, get her
down payment for a house, andshe wanted to open her own business.
She already had her ei n numberthat I found and she had done that
in like a week because I said, okay, well if you want to
do this business, she wanted todo a beauty a beauty business. She
already knew how to do nails,right, she knew how to do hair.

(55:07):
She wanted to learn about cuppying throughbooty to make it bigger. I
could just that name would just justbe and you could see that name on
the spot. I saw her logosthat she started to Wow, she started
to do logos. One of them. I mean, she has that name
is like a performer name or shecould. That name is awesome. I'm

(55:29):
just being honest. She wasn't usingthat. She was going to call it
urban legend, which was strange,but no, I love her name.
And yeah, that name there,that that it got a ringer to it.
And she went by rain to herfriends at her waitressing job. You
could just see that on a buildinga beautician or whatever. Fun fact,

(55:54):
the building she was killed in isprobably going to have her name. Well,
hell, let's do your thing.So you've been hey, man,
you you know you've been pulling gunson a lot of people, not actual
guns. No one is actually harmed, No one was harmed. No animals
was harmed in this. I don'thave to pull guns. I just I

(56:14):
don't know. Man, you comeso aggressive, you just bully me.
You know, guys, I justhave to show up, you know,
just you know, just you know, but that just attested the type of
person. And you know me,even in sports, you know, you
challenge me, I'm going to getup to it. Well you know,
it's the challenge. It's been thechallenge, you know, because your thing

(56:35):
to me even it's like, well, why you're not upset when I share
and just saying that guy, somewheredown the line, I will share a
little more about my son and alittle bit more about me. But today
I want to keep this about youknow, excuse me, the queen in
the house. And and I knowI know that you know, my friend

(56:55):
has been a little rough here,you know, so this kind of thing,
you know, for her to beable to, you know it express
and uh and reflect and I encourageyou to find out more about Carly's story,
you know. I want to keepsome of this fun and light and
I hope that I get guests inhere that we can joke around. But

(57:20):
the topic itself isn't a funny topic, so it's kind of hard. You
know, we're not going to beTravis and Jason Kelcey joking, but you
know, there are some funny stories. But at the same time, I
really encourage you to follow Carly's storyCarlirain dot com. You can reach out
to your representatives because the things thatyou find along this way you are going

(57:43):
to are going to baffle you.So and if you have any conceptions or
misconceptions about northumber Hall or anything inthis urban struggle and questions about anything,
the same way with Amber, youknow they was is that she questioned,
you know, like why did thishappen? I want you you know,

(58:04):
I want you guys to feel freeto put those questions out there. And
because I think that the main thingis forced to gain support, you know,
through Carly, through my son andthrough so many others that because the
support, it's not about raised culture. It's just about a bunch of people
that believe that this shouldn't be happeningand what more can we do about it?

(58:28):
Awesome and thank you for being heretoday. We are going to continue
our conversation and that episode will bedropping on a part to have a wonderful
day and please share Carly's kindness.This is awful love, the last of me.