October 20, 2022 • 37 mins
This is a very special episode of the Let’s Be Real podcast because we have our first-ever returning guest, Grammy award winning artist Meghan Trainor!! In this episode, Sammy Jaye and Meghan have a very candid and long overdue catch-up and talk all things motherhood, her new album, therapy, women rights, and chat about upcoming creative projects she’s working on!
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
Megan, I am so happy about this interview, especially since
you are our first reoccurring guest on the podcast. So
thank you so much for coming back. So things are
having me back. I'm so excited. So much has happened
since we last saw each other a pandemic, You had
a baby. I was in high school, now in college.
There's so much to catch up on. First of all,
(00:25):
how's being a mom. It's the greatest thing ever. Um.
I always wanted to be a mom, so I knew
would be good, but I didn't know beat this good.
And he recently got glasses and he's just I didn't
think he could get cuter, and he's so cute it hurts,
and I just keep going, Oh, I want more, you know,
I want four babies. Four that's a very specific number. Yes,
(00:46):
it's a lot. We're like trying to name the rest
of them already, and everyone's like, are you gonna do
like our names? Are you going to change it up?
That's what I was like, We we have to figure
this out right now, because we either have to do
all ours or we have to go right. He's Lali's
you know, like they all of this sound the same
or something. Our biggest thing is we don't want to
name him after anybody or name our babies after anyone.
(01:06):
And we don't like if you know someone who's like
a bad person with that name name, it ruins a name.
So I'll be like, oh my god, what about this name?
And Daryl's like I hate that guy. I'm like, okay,
you know, so we have to both not know anyone
in the world with that name. Do you go through
the baby books? Oh, I go through the websites that
(01:27):
are like unisex names, and like, I like names that
could be for a boy or a girl. That's my
favorite too, so I'm really narrowing it down, like Dylan
or Sean or Ryan Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. My
brother's name Ryan. So I'm like, I already lost that one.
That's an our name too. I know it's perfect rip.
I might deserve it for like a daughter, so cute,
(01:50):
for a daughter that couldn't be nuts for a redheaded
spy kid, that's it. Yeah, it would break your name
after rule, but because it's a girl, it doesn't count. Yeah,
Like we knew, right, I wanted a girl name Riley,
but then and we knew the name, and then that
they were like at the boy, and I was like,
we're keeping the name. Was it a surprise? Did you
know the gender? They called me at ten weeks they
could do a blood test now sick. I was like,
(02:12):
I need to know now, and she was like, actually
it's a boy. And I was like, oh oh, I'd
be the exactly anticipation of not knowing for nine months. No,
I have no. I think people are crazy that they
can achieve that patience. My mom did that with both
of us, and I was like, how no, no, no,
(02:33):
no no. And then when people are like, you just
have to see the baby's face and then you'll know
the name. Wrong. Baby looks completely every week. That baby changes,
like you have a whole brand new baby every week.
Newborns looks so different than the baby. Oh yeah, especially
if you push it out there aliens for at least
a couple of weeks. Like ruly, yeah, really was having
(02:53):
a C section scary, terrifying. I've never had stitches. I've
never had You're right, dude. I was like, I've had
vocal surgery, but I was asleep this you have to
be awake, you have to be awake, and they come
out in seven minutes. But you hear everything, you smell everything.
You I was like, am I going to be moving?
They're like no, bit, I was on a rollercoaster. I
(03:17):
was like okay. And then he came out and he
wasn't breathing. I was like, where's that cry wasn't breathing.
They took him to the nikki and they're like, dad,
do you want to stay here with wife or do
you want to go to a baby? And I was
like you stay and the doctor was like you should
go with a baby, and I was like, you betrayed me.
And so he left and I was alone for forty
(03:39):
five minutes getting so back up and you didn't get
to meet him right now. I got to see him
for one second and they took him away and I
was like, wow, that didn't go. I was so drugged
up though that I was like, hey, he's fine. Were
the drugs so great? But yeah? Yeah, I mean I
was at ease. Like my mom was like crying on
the phone because she couldn't be with me because of COVID,
(03:59):
So she was are you okay? And I was like
he's good, Like I'm chilling, yeah, And then I talked
about it like weeks after with my therapist and she's like,
so you definitely have some PTSD, Like we have a
little trauma. We're gonna work on that. That was a
traumatic birth and I was like, oh for that to happen. Um,
he was planning for a c session because he was breached,
(04:20):
like he was not in any kind of position to
be pushed out and he flipped right at the end.
And I was like, did you know so? And I
was like watching every video on how to give birth.
I watched my aunt give birth twice. I was like,
I'm ready and then they're like C section. I was like,
I haven't seen these videos yet, like my research. Yeah,
I would get an epidural. I have nothing to please.
(04:42):
Uh no, you need it. I need it. I need
that epidural. My friend Hilary Duff has home births, which
you can't have any drugs for that. She's a hero.
I want to be. I want to be around doctors
just for like my anxiety. Me too. Write I was like,
I want to be tubed up. I want the oxygen clothes,
I want the nicky right everything just in case, because
I feel like the worst case scenarios. Oh yeah, I
(05:04):
go to death every time if I say good bye
to my it's a problem working on. When I say
good bye to anyone, I'm like, you'll probably get in
a car accident. I'll never see you. Get it. That's
how let's go by. It's a real thing I'm working on.
That is actually really funny you say that, because I
used to have horrific separation anxiety, and I would always
I couldn't do sleepovers, and I would always think if
I want to sleep over that I would either die
or my parents would die. Wow. Yeah, and therapy helped,
(05:30):
see and now I don't have those Wow, that's amazing.
We have a lot in common, Megan, we do. I
feel you girl, stay in that therapy. It's amazing. Really.
What's the hardest part about having a kid that no
one told you about? I guess I wasn't warned a
(05:52):
lot of like when they fall, like you have to
You're gonna just watch it happen, you know, and you
have to try to not go what baby, you know,
which I do, and Daryl's like, calm, come, you know,
they look how you react to Yeah, no one really
talks about, like, I don't know, when they fall it
hurts if they're in any pain, if he has a cold,
(06:12):
You're just like, oh my god, you're as happy as
your least happy as kid, which is real. What has
been the most interesting part of seeing your son grow?
That is just like, oh my goodness, he's like a human. Aw.
I guess like the eyesight part, Like I didn't realize
too when they're infants there like they can only see
a certain distance, So that was bizarre, Like they're literally
(06:33):
learning how to see and breathe and eat and swallow.
Something that's so refreshing about Like what you post in
your content is just that it's honest and you're not
showing the easy parts, which I feel like is what
social media is off in a highlight reel. So what
made you want to get more into social media? Because
you're you have the podcast now pick talk with social
(06:56):
media expert. How what made you open up more and
not those platforms? Um? I mean, I think like the
pandemic showed me that we can work from home. And
I enjoy working from home because usually we're on the
road constantly, and now with a baby, I'm trying to
do more work from home so I could see him
and be with him. So I think a podcast with
(07:17):
my brother too. Was just like a fun extra way
to have therapy with him. And we've had many family breakthroughs.
So if you ever, like are struggling with a family member,
just start a podcast and you just talk for an
hour a day. It's great. What's the biggest thing? Being
on a podcast has taught you? Um that there's other
(07:37):
people out there that feel exactly how you feel. It's
very nice. It's very nice. And it's like watching Ryan
talk about his sobriety and how many people comment like, Yo,
I'm going through the same thing and you talking about
it really helps me. Like watching him see how his
words impact others out there is a beautiful thing and
(07:57):
it's like something and not a lot of people get
to experience. So that was the best part. And I'm
so beyond proud of him. I think he's the coolest.
He's like my favorite person ever. So watching him become
a better person because he's been working on it has
been the best part of our lives. How is the podcast?
Has it made you guys closer or has it brought
some tension? Because I know working with family can bring
(08:18):
some Oh, it's definitely made us closer. Well, I always
worked with my family, so we're not like that luckily
think thank god. Um, but he used to be my
camera guy forever and he never was like I want
to take pictures. I just like threw a camera in
his hands and he was like okay, and he was
like I'm not even looking, but sure. And I think
over years of that, he wanted to quit and we
(08:39):
got into a big blow up. Um, and that was
like the last time we drank. So that was him
trying to say I want to quit, but not like
upset you. And I was like, I want you to
quit and not freak out. So it was, um, this
is a new lane where he's like working and he's
in front of the camera and he is really honest
with himself and it's helped him a lot. It's like
(09:00):
the best therapy. He just becomes such a nice person,
a nicer person because it was already great. I love that.
And I think there's something about the podcast format where
there's no like three minute videos where you have to
like get him points. You can just kind of show
your personality and for yourself. Oh yeah, I'm always like
you do want to plan something, It's like, nah, we'll
wing it. I'm like, okay, and we do just because,
(09:22):
like we're best friends, so we can just chat all
day long. Yeah. I love working on a podcast. I
love your podcast. You're amazing. Thank you so much. I
feel like you're just talking about how human you are.
We need more of that. Yeah, we're like working on it.
The concept is like we're just working on being better
humans in every category of our life. So we get really,
(09:43):
really open and really honest. And I like that. I
think it's harder to pretend to be somebody when you're
in this business. It's like it's exhausting. So being myself
people enjoy that, and that's wonderful because I don't have
to pretend to be anybody else. Do you think showing
more yourself on social media has allowed you to be
more open in your songwriting and your music or they
(10:05):
two separate things in your mind? Oh yeah for sure. Um,
especially like this album I'm might come out. I came
out with Bad for Me, which is like, um, a
slower song, but a real situation that I had with
my therapist with a family member and had to write
a letter and send it to him and and that
(10:26):
stuff is real and I wrote it the next day,
and a lot of people I've seen on TikTok relate
to that, and they they'll even say I needed this
like ten years ago, like this song is me right now,
and it's it's really cool to relate with other others
like that. And I've been writing a lot about being
a mom because I feel like moms aren't supposed to
(10:47):
complain or cry online, and you know, and it's like, well,
it's a lot of stuff is hard and scary. Like
we just found out he's not using his left eye
because it's like, yeah, because his eyesight is that bad
that he just wasn't using it. And when we discovered that,
Darryl and I were like heartbroken because we're like, we
had no idea this poor boy like couldn't see. So
(11:09):
there's a lot of crazy emotions that come of being
a parent, and I want to talk about it because
it helps a lot of people out there and it
makes me feel like I'm normal. I actually had a
similar experience when I was about four. My left I
used to cross and I couldn't. Yeah, I had to
use the eye patch and everything on my right eye
to make it stronger. I had my little red glasses
(11:29):
so I know the struggle. Yeah, there, and they find
it younger now, so they can find it at six
months old. So when he's a year and a half,
he's a baby and he has glasses, and they were like, well,
at least you caught it now, And I was like, what,
I feel like, he's so young. They're like, well, nowadays,
we can catch it earlier. But my brothers didn't get
glasses untill they were like four, so they lived their
life like walking into walls. That was me. I would
(11:52):
literally My brother used to make fun of me. I
would walk when we're in a hotel room and they
were clear doors, I couldn't tell that they were closed,
so I would just walk into the door because I
just could not have that depth perception. It's so heartbreaking,
and your parents, like they must have felt so bad.
We just felt so bad. My brother was cracking up.
He was cracking up, and I was just crying on
(12:14):
the floor. But that's what siblings are for, that's what
we're he for. Yeah, that's what they're here for. But
I feel like growing up can be really hard, and
I think it's really cool how you're documenting the struggles
of being a parent because again, it's just not happening much. Yeah,
I don't know if I'm even allow to talk about it,
but I want to do it for you because I
love you. I'm writing a book about pregnancy and like
(12:36):
how bizarre it is and like things no one told me,
you know, So what's the strangest see the open No
one told you about pregnancy because I'm very cure. Um,
I knew like you could have different skin like pimples
and stuff, but I straight up got um perioral dermatitis
where it's like dry rough patches kind of like rosatia.
And I just thought I kept like burning my skin
(12:58):
on products or like the cup brushes I were using
where I was allergic to, so I'd have these dry
patches and it was miserable and itchy, and I was
like what is this? And later I found out like, oh,
it can come with your hormone and balance, and I
was like, oh, so there's like there's really strange stuff
that I'm going to get into in the book. The
women's body is crazy. It's crazy. We're amazing. We're the greatest.
(13:22):
We're the greatest. I grew eyelids. Eyelids, did you know?
Fun fact? That always like blew my mind. You grow
the taste buds and the eyelashes and the third trimester,
whoa sick? Did you ever feel the pressure of bouncing
back after having a kid, because I feel like there's
this big pressure on like snapping back into your same body,
(13:42):
but no, like your body changes. I knew like I
had a goal of snapping back because I also was
my heaviest when I got pregnant. I was like in
COVID gained a fift you know, like I was up.
I was a hundred and eighty five pounds and that
was my heaviest, and and I got pregnant and I
went up to like to twenty and so when I
(14:04):
after I gave birth, he los like ten pounds because
that's the baby. But I got a dietitian after I
was trying to do it myself and I wasn't succeeding
because I didn't know how to work out right or
eat right, and I tried to count calories and it
was miserable, and I was like, I don't want to
hate this. So I got a dietitian and she taught
me like the beauty of healthy food and how few
does food is fuel. It's not just like yeah, it's
(14:28):
it could be a beautiful thing. She taught me how
like we're all burning fires, right, and if your fire
goes out, like you don't eat for a long time,
you're gonna feel angry and miserable. And if you try
to throw a fat log on that fire, like eat
a fat, huge meal, it's not going to make the
fire go up. You're just gonna like give yourself a
tummy ache. So she taught me, like, you have to
(14:49):
eat snacks all day and you have to like always
eat when you're hungry. And I was like, wow, I
thought it was like starve, you know. So she taught me,
I love healthy food and I lost like sick steve pounds.
Now I'm like, I'm like one, wait, I weigh one
fifty seven now and when I was when I got
practice five. So I'm like the healthiest I've ever been.
(15:10):
As long as you feel good, that's what matters. And
something I never thought I would struggle with was food. Yeah,
I would go through those cycles. I think being on
social media really exacerbated it, where I was like, Okay,
I'm gonna work out, I'm gonna eat right, and then
it would get to the point where I also go
c D, which I think dieting for me not good,
(15:31):
and I would be like, oh my goodness, there are
too many calories and strawberry and right when that happened,
I was like, I think we have an issue. Yeah,
it's scary and it's it's it can really mess with
your mind. So my dietician taught me, She's like, we're
not going to weigh this week, it doesn't matter, Like
do you feel good? And I'd be like, yeah, I
feel great. Yeah, And that's how we do it. And
(15:52):
she's just so good. She also specializes with like teenagers
or anyone with a eating disorder. Um. But she told
me to that like a ten year old boy came
in with like anorexia, Like it's it's kind of spiking
again and I think it's social media and it's heartbreaking.
But she's like having her specialized in that too really
(16:14):
helps me out because she makes sure like are you happy,
are you talking to your therapists? Is everything okay? How
is your week been? So she changed my life. Her
name is Christie Christie. She changed my life forever and
changed my bad habits. I wasn't taking care of myself
and now I am that's so important and it's it's
really hard to get yourself to that point to fully
(16:35):
love yourself. And I feel like we're also on that journey.
What advice do you have for little tips and tricks
to get through the day to stay more positive and confident? Oh? Man,
I have I've heard so many things, but I mean
self talk, like being positive. I know it's hard, but
so hard. The more negative, the negative you are, like,
the more your brain heres that like fourteen thousand times
(16:56):
over and over again, so you're just bullying yourself. Um.
And my therapist had me look in the mirror for
five minutes a day naked and just look at myself,
and I was like, I hate this, Like it was
the hardest. Day one was the hardest thing ever. Day
three I was like, huh, yeah, you start, it starts
(17:17):
turning and you see the that it's working. So Um,
it's all starts with you working on yourself and it's
very hard to do, but it's a thing. I'm working
on it every day. That sounds like what I used
to do exposure therapy, where it's essentially just doing your
biggest fears and then just going straight into it. And
it's a fact Oprah Toppy that one. Yeah, whatever scares
(17:40):
you, you you should probably do it, like okay, And I
had to do a TV show right after I gave birth.
I had like, um three months off and which is
like the normal of what they have now because America
is crazy. But I was like, I'm gonna be on
television that like gains ten pounds no matter what. And
it was a food program, so I had to eat
food all day. Top set failed me style to check
(18:01):
it out, and I'm like, I was like pumping during
breaks and then I was like eating their food and
I was like, oh, I was really on a like
on on a program and I was really looking forward
to not doing this. But I'm the only woman in
history who's lost weight on that show. Because it's all
about moderation. That's what that show taught me, is like
I can eat whatever I want as long as it's whittle.
(18:21):
That's a fun fact. Fun fact. Yeah, everything moderation. Yeah. Well,
actually on set, it was like all women and they
were so they took care of me, and one was
pregnant like literally every day. I was like, oh girl,
you're a hero. Okay, let's take a quick break, but
when we come back, I'm going to talk about being
a woman in America these days, all the different thousands
(18:43):
of music you're bringing in your new album, how hard
but beneficial it is, cutting out toxic relationships out of
your life, and so much more. We'll be right fact
and we're back. It's really hard to be a woman nowadays,
especially in America, And I just want to thank you
(19:03):
also for posting and talking on social media about what's
happening with the Supreme Court and Ruby Wade, because it's
more people should talk about it, and it's a really
hard thing. So thank you for saying something. I know.
Thank you. Thank you for saying that I got a lot.
I don't get a lot of hate comments or I
don't look for them, but that one I got a
(19:24):
lot of nasty stuff. And it's not even like hate comments.
This this ship was evil. It was like, well, at
least you didn't abort your beautiful song. And I was like,
oh my goodness. So I turned off the comments and
life is much better. But at that day, I was
releasing my song that day, so I was like, oh,
this sucks, you know, And I wanted to make sure
I wasn't posting about me, and then I was like,
(19:45):
I really have to say something, and this is terrible,
and it's We're supposed to be land of the free
and it doesn't feel like it. It really doesn't. I
did a post it's scary to be a woman. But
hopefully by having these conversations and talking about it, we
can change the stigma that I don't know where it
came from. Yeah, it's like we're going backwards. I don't
(20:06):
get it. I'm in college right now, and I'm very
scared and just I'm an anxious person, but like adding
the social aspect and knowing that my rights aren't secured.
Its like in some places, like birth control is being
taken away, and it's like there's so many medical reasons
why we need all these things and they're not thinking
(20:27):
about that. It's very, very frustrating. And my friend and
I joke all the time, like should we go to Canada?
Like she would just late to go to Canada. Now
there's a dawn devout a house. Um yeah, but it's
scary and hopefully something good will happen because we're just
going the wrong way. Just to switch topics a little bit,
I have really noticed about your music and this next
(20:48):
album is you're changing up the style. You're just trying
out different styles, different dramas, and I love it, yes, ma'am. Yeah,
I was going really pop for a while there because
I love pop and I love this is still pop music.
But I did want to bring in my elements from
my first album. I keep telling people it's like title
two point oh um if title grew up, you know,
(21:11):
and it's so you'll hear like the duop vibes that
everyone loves. And I tried to go songwriting first, So
songs like Superwomen are very like people call my Dolly
parton song um, and that's I was really proud of
that because my whole life, like my favorite thing in
life is songwriting. So when I'm improving there, I'm like, oh,
I'm winning, you know, like I'm doing the best. Like yeah,
(21:34):
I like the practice finally made it through, you know.
And so these songs are very powerful and I think
my best songwriting yet. I know it too because I've
experienced life more and I think there there's that balance
where to write about life you have to experience it
and not just focus on writing. So what has that
process been to not focus on like if the song
(21:55):
is going to be vial, but focus on improving the
writing and becoming the best art is for yourself. Yeah,
I think the best part about writing a whole album
and a project is that you can You can't have
songs like what it's really because I have a platform.
It's like what do I want to say? And then
being a mom, I was like, well, I want to say,
like this is hard and like and everyone was interviewing
(22:16):
me at the time and they're like, you're still positive,
it's so happy and you're like, how do you do it?
You're so confident, And I was like, no, dude, I
write these songs because I'm just in my head, like
I see a therapist every week. I'm on antidepressants, Like
I'm I'm here and I'm working my booty on working
on it. I'm working on it, but you gotta work
on it. And that's My songs are my therapy. Like
(22:39):
my songs are me admitting like not everything is perfect
over here, you know, um, especially bad for me. I
didn't know that would be a single. I didn't know
that the first that's like a real personal thing that's
happening in my family that my family members are like,
that's going first. I'm like, it's like I was just
trying to work through something that her. I'm just trying
to cope over here, I'm just coping. So yeah, this
(23:03):
album had a lot of heart, and I think like
the last song on the album, called Final Breath is
literally um the movie The Notebook, because I tell Darryl, like,
that's how we're gonna die, like holding hands in bed Old.
That's so bittersweet and romantic at the same time. Yeah. Yeah,
So I have an impending doom fear of death. So
(23:23):
that's the album for sure. Oh yeah, yeah, I've always
been terrified. It's the unknown of it. It's the unknowing.
I'm going to like, I'm going to a haunted mansion
with the podcast at the end of this month to
hopefully see a ghost so that I know I could
stick around after I pass, you know what I mean,
And I want to know that I could still chill
(23:45):
with my kids. Do you believe in ghosts? I want
you so bad. I just haven't seen one, but I
love watching the videos online. I'm like, I might be real,
you know, I'm like skeptical, but I'm like, but like,
if it were real, that'd be pretty crazy. I'm like,
that's so wonderful to know that I get chilly here
and haunt everyone. Yeah, that's what I'm hoping for. Manifest, Manifest, Manifest, Manifest, Manifest,
(24:08):
Hunt Forever do you manifest? I guess so, but not
like intentionally, like wake up. Yeah. I'll say stuff like
we're gonna write a book one day, you know, and
then I'm doing it, or like we're gonna have four kids,
four kids for kids, you know that's gonna happen. I'm
always I want twins too, so I get a two
for one deal and I'm like, damn, we're gonna have twins.
(24:29):
And I already had a C section. So there's like
a target like my head. Just open it right back up.
We'll get him out safely, you know. So that's a dream.
Something that I really love about the song Bad for
Me is how honest it is. There are so few
songs that talk about the hard stuff, the hard stuff
and the toxicity that relationships can form. And just because
it was amazing at one point doesn't mean that it's
(24:50):
still meant to go on. Do you struggle with that? Also?
Cutting relationships if it gets a little toxic. Oh my god. Yeah,
I've got it from my mom. Wh just I feel
so bad. We were in therapy yesterday. I dragged my
mom to therapy and she was like, you guys, feel
like you're responsible for everyone's feelings huh. And I was
like yeah, ding ding ding, like I have to make
(25:11):
sure everyone's happy and like and my mom is the
same way, so I got it from her. Um, She's like,
you're not really responsible for everyone's happiness, right, Like it's
not up to you. And I was like, oh, so,
like yeah, this situation when you have a family member,
it's so hard because I've cut off friends and I've
seen the benefits and like seeing, oh my god, life
(25:33):
is so much easier, um and better and um I
think like Meryl Streep said something like that, like if
they're toxic, then they need to be out of your life.
And I was like, I'll do what every say Meryl
Streep and oprah, Um, there's just like soul suckers, you know.
But um, when it's family, it's harder, man, because they're
not chosen and they're they're like they're blood and you
(25:55):
have to see them every Christmas and and it's really
difficult to try to ask them like, Okay, this isn't
good for me. We need space or we need time,
especially when you write out a beautiful letter and get
no response. Like that really sucked, but it it told
me like what I'm doing is right, you know, like
when they show who they are, that's who they are,
(26:18):
believe them. I went through that and I wrote a
letter to a family member a few months ago, and
I never sent it. Really I did because I knew
there was going to be no response, So I just
wrote it and I got all the closure from that.
You know what I have? My team is so smart.
They did this honestly. Um they made a website for me,
a campaign for the song. My therapist told me to
(26:39):
dot co or you can literally go write an anonymous
letter and just like blasted out. That's amazing, so smart.
I was like, we have to take one more quick break,
but when we come back, I want to talk about
how therapist impacted your life, your marriage and going back
on tour. We'll be right back and we're back. How
(27:07):
long have you been in therapy? A couple of years now.
But I got a new therapist that like because that's
the thing. If you have one bad therapy session, you
just like I hate it. My family and my parents
are in that generation where they're like, I don't need therapy.
I'm not crazy. I'm like, you need so much therapy.
It's insane if you're saying that you need therapy. Yeah, exactly.
(27:27):
So I got this therapist though that specializes in like
moms who work and who are famous too, So I
got the Jackpod. Like yeah, she but other than that,
she's like she's such a genius. Everything she asked me
questions like nobody does that in therapy. She's like when
she asked me, like, wow, that's that's crazy. Are you
(27:47):
responsible for everyone's happiness and like their life and how
they turn out? Like it's like maybe, I'm like, but
I could be, but I don't know. Yeah, she's good.
I'm in a new thing is where I'm like, I'm
looking for a therapist. It's hard. It's like dating. It
is like dating, and that was I'm having no luck
in that area either because I have you will I promise.
(28:12):
I heard bumble is really good. I heard bumbles great.
I've tried core stories. Also, like there's still that the
if your friend knows someone that works that works for me.
I asked my friend. I was like, do you know
any guys who are like really nice? I just want
a nice guy. And then I met him. Was like,
we're getting married. I love that story. How long have
you been married for? Now? We've known each other now,
(28:34):
we dated started six years ago. We had just had
our date anniversary July one, and um, we've been married
for three years now. How's how's the marriage life? Is
it different than you saw? No, it's like exactly what
I thought. It's amazing. But it's better than I thought
it would be. I thought I'd marry like some douche
and I'd have to train him. But he's such a
(28:55):
softy and he's so emotional and it's so good for
us because he like cares extra Like on Mother's Day,
he wrote me a card and then he'll write a
card from Riley Like he's he's a softie. He's really
really cute, and he would write before had babies, he'd
write every card from my dogs. It's like I have
Mother's Day, mom, we love you, things to take care
of us. I was like, yeah, he's one of those
(29:16):
so like but now I feel like I have to
preach to the world, like don't settle. There's really good
men out there, you know. It's hard. I feel like
something that has blown my mind at college is that
people only, at least what I've experienced, ask for Snapchat.
Where did phone numbers go? That's so weird, And they
(29:36):
don't even everything is on snap text or Snapchat, and
no conversations are just photos. I'm like, I don't want
to see your face. I'm not even on stampchat again.
I gotta get back on there. I feel like social
media's ruined, ruined, ruined dating because my older brother, he's
like almost thirty, and he's with his friends and his
friends like, oh my god, that girl is so beautiful,
(29:57):
Like I would do anything to date her, and he's like,
gotta say hi, and he's like, what, I can't talk
to her in person. It's like, I'll just like find
her on Instagram. I was like, Ryan's like, oh, no,
go for in person over a d M always just
d m R. Yeah. That's one of the things about
social media where I find if I'm on it for
too long, I need to get off. Yeah, we take
(30:19):
breaks for sure. Something else that I want to talk
to you about is that I know you've written songs
for so many artists. We talked about this in the
last episode. I was very curious to know. Is the
songwriting process when you're writing for someone else, how does
it differ from when you're writing for yourself. It's always different. Um,
recently I've been writing for uh. I don't know if
I'm allowed to say this, screw it. I've been writing
(30:41):
for Judges Siwa and she's my friend, so it's different
that way where she's like like she comes over to
my house and we have a full session and she
gives me ideas and she writes with me. So like
in that world, I'm writing with the artists. But in
other worlds, I'll have songs that are just banked that
didn't really make sense with my album, and I have
(31:01):
a bunch of extra ones um and but some are
so special and they're like, oh God, that needs a home,
and we always say, like that needs a really good home,
so um, we'll pitch stuff like that. Or the producers
I've written with who have those songs that aren't out there,
like can we pitch them? So I have like I think, um,
(31:21):
a K pop girl I think is about to cut
one of my extra songs that I had. I'm like, yes,
more home for them to go to. Yeah, it's so random,
and it's my dreams to write for more artists. So
my team was like, this time around, let's let's write
for you and then let's get take more sessions and
just write for the artists. I was like, I would
love to who's your dream artist to write for? It
(31:42):
could be great for any artists right now, dead or alive.
Who would it be? Well? Nowadays, I just want to
write a song with Ed Shearon because I think it'd
be some medical and Britta mars Um. I would love
to write a pop banger for Dualipa. I feel like
they'd be easy and fun um and who else I love?
I love Tate the new artist. Am I saying that right? Yeah?
(32:05):
Tate McRae, Kate McGray, she was on the plodcast. She's
so cool. I want to write for her. She's so cool.
If anyone wants to sing my songs, that's a dream.
When you're writing for like your friends versus just having artists,
how does that process differ. I'll just try to write
like made the best song win I'll just try to
write a really good song and then then we'll be like, oh,
(32:28):
this sounds like her, you know how like dual lipos
in that disco pop world. If I wrote a disco
pop song like let's pitch out to do a you know,
I would die to write like a Caribbean song for Rihanna,
like a reggae song, And that's my real dreams. I
just want to hear her lullabies that I know. I'm
(32:48):
trying to do a lulla by album too, like a
kid's music, because I've seen there's like the market small,
you know, for these kids have the perfect voice for
it too, I know. And then I can make little
YouTube videos and be like, Hi, we're gonna sing this
song today. You can get like little calming bird animations
of just like I'd be like, that's mama, I think
(33:11):
this needs to happen, and you're right them. I haven't
heard of many like lullaby albums. Um, what's her name?
One girl did it and she did great, The girl
who Sings A a thousand years. I loved you for those.
Christina Perry. Christina Parry, she did an amazing kids lullabye
album that was really beautiful. So I gotta try to
(33:32):
talk back. No, I gotta try to listen to that
and take notes, because she nailed it with this entail
writing like children's songs are going off. I want to
see she did like great covers too, but I want
to do like originals, like I'm sick of um ashes
ashes we all fall down, so dark, all these things
are so dark. And the rockabye baby, like when the
(33:55):
tree has a crat old weld rock and the what
is the lyrics I've never heard when the bow bakes,
the cradle will fall and debil come baby quite Lyndall, Like,
what is scarier than that? Nothing? So I'm gonna rewrite them.
Why was that saying to us as a child that
we're going to It's terrific. There's a lot of really
(34:16):
scary ones, so I'm gonna try to rewrite those and
make them like pop. Would you ever write a musical?
I would love to, Yeah, my dream Dream Dream one
of my other bucket lists dreams besides writing, like all
the music to an animated film that I write is
not for then for it to go on Broadway, And
then I'm just like, wow, my songs are just playing
on Broadway, like, and I don't think I have the
(34:37):
strength to go do eight shows a night and starting
it myself. But I'd love to just be known as
like the songwriter, you know, kind of like a Sarah
Brella's waitress moment following I'm just right behind Sarah following
her would you ever read a children's book? Yes? After
my pregnancy book already got it. It's gonna have textures, dude,
I'm doing it all like you. The xtures. Yeah, that
(35:01):
those are the big hits that My kid only likes
those books and I don't know why because he can't
see poor kids, he felt. Now, does he have to
wear the eye patches? No, we skipped right over that,
I think because it's that bad um. And he just
wears his glasses and it took him like two days,
but now he wears them all the time if he
because he forgets they're on. They're so cute. To check
(35:22):
out my Instagram. I did a video of it. Oh
I saw. I very much saw heartbreaking with the red
hair and the blue glass. Oh yeah, oh yeah, they're
like turquoise see through. I was like, oh, this is
exactly what I wanted. Who picked out those glasses. Honestly,
they were the first ones we saw there and the
guy Michael his great. But I gotta go get like
(35:44):
eight more pair because we're gonna be on the cover
of magazine soon, so I need to get the anti
reflective ones. You know what I'm saying. Boys a star.
I used to have the transition glasses where they turned
into sunglasses when you go outside. See, that's sick. I
didn't know that was the thing. Goggles they're great. They
turn into sunglasses when you're outside, and they get dark
when you come back, and they get normal again. Tight tight,
(36:06):
tight tight. He's also like see through a pale. He's
so white, so when he goes in the sun, we're
like hat glasses cover. So I'm very curious. You have
the album coming out, you have the book. Are you
working on anything else for just for your creative self,
just to fill you. I eventually want a tour because
I haven't sang in front of a crowd and since
before COVID, so I would love to see everyone again. Um,
(36:27):
I'll have a baby this time, so it's going to
be a game changer. UM I do want to tour.
I think a will tour and then um, then I
want to get pregnant on tour the tour bus. Yes,
the tour bus. I will be pregnant, I hope. So yeah,
I'm gonna start trying like a day one of tour,
and we're like, we're gonna make a baby, you know.
So that's kind of great because he'd be like, you
(36:48):
were conceived in this city, period, and then we should
name them that city. Oh my god, I'm like Kim Kardassian.
Oh if you named him, Oh my god, if you
have your baby in Brooklyn, San Francisco, San Francisco, imagine
San Francisco. Thank you so much, Megan, this made my day.
I wish of you. I will literally do this whenever
(37:10):
you want. You just call me. Thank you so much.
All yeah, have me back anytime. I'm ready. Awesome
Megan, I am so happy about this interview, especially since
you are our first reoccurring guest on the podcast. So
thank you so much for coming back. So things are
having me back. I'm so excited. So much has happened
since we last saw each other a pandemic, You had
a baby. I was in high school, now in college.
There's so much to catch up on. First of all,
(00:25):
how's being a mom. It's the greatest thing ever. Um.
I always wanted to be a mom, so I knew
would be good, but I didn't know beat this good.
And he recently got glasses and he's just I didn't
think he could get cuter, and he's so cute it hurts,
and I just keep going, Oh, I want more, you know,
I want four babies. Four that's a very specific number. Yes,
(00:46):
it's a lot. We're like trying to name the rest
of them already, and everyone's like, are you gonna do
like our names? Are you going to change it up?
That's what I was like, We we have to figure
this out right now, because we either have to do
all ours or we have to go right. He's Lali's
you know, like they all of this sound the same
or something. Our biggest thing is we don't want to
name him after anybody or name our babies after anyone.
(01:06):
And we don't like if you know someone who's like
a bad person with that name name, it ruins a name.
So I'll be like, oh my god, what about this name?
And Daryl's like I hate that guy. I'm like, okay,
you know, so we have to both not know anyone
in the world with that name. Do you go through
the baby books? Oh, I go through the websites that
(01:27):
are like unisex names, and like, I like names that
could be for a boy or a girl. That's my
favorite too, so I'm really narrowing it down, like Dylan
or Sean or Ryan Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. My
brother's name Ryan. So I'm like, I already lost that one.
That's an our name too. I know it's perfect rip.
I might deserve it for like a daughter, so cute,
(01:50):
for a daughter that couldn't be nuts for a redheaded
spy kid, that's it. Yeah, it would break your name
after rule, but because it's a girl, it doesn't count. Yeah,
Like we knew, right, I wanted a girl name Riley,
but then and we knew the name, and then that
they were like at the boy, and I was like,
we're keeping the name. Was it a surprise? Did you
know the gender? They called me at ten weeks they
could do a blood test now sick. I was like,
(02:12):
I need to know now, and she was like, actually
it's a boy. And I was like, oh oh, I'd
be the exactly anticipation of not knowing for nine months. No,
I have no. I think people are crazy that they
can achieve that patience. My mom did that with both
of us, and I was like, how no, no, no,
(02:33):
no no. And then when people are like, you just
have to see the baby's face and then you'll know
the name. Wrong. Baby looks completely every week. That baby changes,
like you have a whole brand new baby every week.
Newborns looks so different than the baby. Oh yeah, especially
if you push it out there aliens for at least
a couple of weeks. Like ruly, yeah, really was having
(02:53):
a C section scary, terrifying. I've never had stitches. I've
never had You're right, dude. I was like, I've had
vocal surgery, but I was asleep this you have to
be awake, you have to be awake, and they come
out in seven minutes. But you hear everything, you smell everything.
You I was like, am I going to be moving?
They're like no, bit, I was on a rollercoaster. I
(03:17):
was like okay. And then he came out and he
wasn't breathing. I was like, where's that cry wasn't breathing.
They took him to the nikki and they're like, dad,
do you want to stay here with wife or do
you want to go to a baby? And I was
like you stay and the doctor was like you should
go with a baby, and I was like, you betrayed me.
And so he left and I was alone for forty
(03:39):
five minutes getting so back up and you didn't get
to meet him right now. I got to see him
for one second and they took him away and I
was like, wow, that didn't go. I was so drugged
up though that I was like, hey, he's fine. Were
the drugs so great? But yeah? Yeah, I mean I
was at ease. Like my mom was like crying on
the phone because she couldn't be with me because of COVID,
(03:59):
So she was are you okay? And I was like
he's good, Like I'm chilling, yeah, And then I talked
about it like weeks after with my therapist and she's like,
so you definitely have some PTSD, Like we have a
little trauma. We're gonna work on that. That was a
traumatic birth and I was like, oh for that to happen. Um,
he was planning for a c session because he was breached,
(04:20):
like he was not in any kind of position to
be pushed out and he flipped right at the end.
And I was like, did you know so? And I
was like watching every video on how to give birth.
I watched my aunt give birth twice. I was like,
I'm ready and then they're like C section. I was like,
I haven't seen these videos yet, like my research. Yeah,
I would get an epidural. I have nothing to please.
(04:42):
Uh no, you need it. I need it. I need
that epidural. My friend Hilary Duff has home births, which
you can't have any drugs for that. She's a hero.
I want to be. I want to be around doctors
just for like my anxiety. Me too. Write I was like,
I want to be tubed up. I want the oxygen clothes,
I want the nicky right everything just in case, because
I feel like the worst case scenarios. Oh yeah, I
(05:04):
go to death every time if I say good bye
to my it's a problem working on. When I say
good bye to anyone, I'm like, you'll probably get in
a car accident. I'll never see you. Get it. That's
how let's go by. It's a real thing I'm working on.
That is actually really funny you say that, because I
used to have horrific separation anxiety, and I would always
I couldn't do sleepovers, and I would always think if
I want to sleep over that I would either die
or my parents would die. Wow. Yeah, and therapy helped,
(05:30):
see and now I don't have those Wow, that's amazing.
We have a lot in common, Megan, we do. I
feel you girl, stay in that therapy. It's amazing. Really.
What's the hardest part about having a kid that no
one told you about? I guess I wasn't warned a
(05:52):
lot of like when they fall, like you have to
You're gonna just watch it happen, you know, and you
have to try to not go what baby, you know,
which I do, and Daryl's like, calm, come, you know,
they look how you react to Yeah, no one really
talks about, like, I don't know, when they fall it
hurts if they're in any pain, if he has a cold,
(06:12):
You're just like, oh my god, you're as happy as
your least happy as kid, which is real. What has
been the most interesting part of seeing your son grow?
That is just like, oh my goodness, he's like a human. Aw.
I guess like the eyesight part, Like I didn't realize
too when they're infants there like they can only see
a certain distance, So that was bizarre, Like they're literally
(06:33):
learning how to see and breathe and eat and swallow.
Something that's so refreshing about Like what you post in
your content is just that it's honest and you're not
showing the easy parts, which I feel like is what
social media is off in a highlight reel. So what
made you want to get more into social media? Because
you're you have the podcast now pick talk with social
(06:56):
media expert. How what made you open up more and
not those platforms? Um? I mean, I think like the
pandemic showed me that we can work from home. And
I enjoy working from home because usually we're on the
road constantly, and now with a baby, I'm trying to
do more work from home so I could see him
and be with him. So I think a podcast with
(07:17):
my brother too. Was just like a fun extra way
to have therapy with him. And we've had many family breakthroughs.
So if you ever, like are struggling with a family member,
just start a podcast and you just talk for an
hour a day. It's great. What's the biggest thing? Being
on a podcast has taught you? Um that there's other
(07:37):
people out there that feel exactly how you feel. It's
very nice. It's very nice. And it's like watching Ryan
talk about his sobriety and how many people comment like, Yo,
I'm going through the same thing and you talking about
it really helps me. Like watching him see how his
words impact others out there is a beautiful thing and
(07:57):
it's like something and not a lot of people get
to experience. So that was the best part. And I'm
so beyond proud of him. I think he's the coolest.
He's like my favorite person ever. So watching him become
a better person because he's been working on it has
been the best part of our lives. How is the podcast?
Has it made you guys closer or has it brought
some tension? Because I know working with family can bring
(08:18):
some Oh, it's definitely made us closer. Well, I always
worked with my family, so we're not like that luckily
think thank god. Um, but he used to be my
camera guy forever and he never was like I want
to take pictures. I just like threw a camera in
his hands and he was like okay, and he was
like I'm not even looking, but sure. And I think
over years of that, he wanted to quit and we
(08:39):
got into a big blow up. Um, and that was
like the last time we drank. So that was him
trying to say I want to quit, but not like
upset you. And I was like, I want you to
quit and not freak out. So it was, um, this
is a new lane where he's like working and he's
in front of the camera and he is really honest
with himself and it's helped him a lot. It's like
(09:00):
the best therapy. He just becomes such a nice person,
a nicer person because it was already great. I love that.
And I think there's something about the podcast format where
there's no like three minute videos where you have to
like get him points. You can just kind of show
your personality and for yourself. Oh yeah, I'm always like
you do want to plan something, It's like, nah, we'll
wing it. I'm like, okay, and we do just because,
(09:22):
like we're best friends, so we can just chat all
day long. Yeah. I love working on a podcast. I
love your podcast. You're amazing. Thank you so much. I
feel like you're just talking about how human you are.
We need more of that. Yeah, we're like working on it.
The concept is like we're just working on being better
humans in every category of our life. So we get really,
(09:43):
really open and really honest. And I like that. I
think it's harder to pretend to be somebody when you're
in this business. It's like it's exhausting. So being myself
people enjoy that, and that's wonderful because I don't have
to pretend to be anybody else. Do you think showing
more yourself on social media has allowed you to be
more open in your songwriting and your music or they
(10:05):
two separate things in your mind? Oh yeah for sure. Um,
especially like this album I'm might come out. I came
out with Bad for Me, which is like, um, a
slower song, but a real situation that I had with
my therapist with a family member and had to write
a letter and send it to him and and that
(10:26):
stuff is real and I wrote it the next day,
and a lot of people I've seen on TikTok relate
to that, and they they'll even say I needed this
like ten years ago, like this song is me right now,
and it's it's really cool to relate with other others
like that. And I've been writing a lot about being
a mom because I feel like moms aren't supposed to
(10:47):
complain or cry online, and you know, and it's like, well,
it's a lot of stuff is hard and scary. Like
we just found out he's not using his left eye
because it's like, yeah, because his eyesight is that bad
that he just wasn't using it. And when we discovered that,
Darryl and I were like heartbroken because we're like, we
had no idea this poor boy like couldn't see. So
(11:09):
there's a lot of crazy emotions that come of being
a parent, and I want to talk about it because
it helps a lot of people out there and it
makes me feel like I'm normal. I actually had a
similar experience when I was about four. My left I
used to cross and I couldn't. Yeah, I had to
use the eye patch and everything on my right eye
to make it stronger. I had my little red glasses
(11:29):
so I know the struggle. Yeah, there, and they find
it younger now, so they can find it at six
months old. So when he's a year and a half,
he's a baby and he has glasses, and they were like, well,
at least you caught it now, And I was like, what,
I feel like, he's so young. They're like, well, nowadays,
we can catch it earlier. But my brothers didn't get
glasses untill they were like four, so they lived their
life like walking into walls. That was me. I would
(11:52):
literally My brother used to make fun of me. I
would walk when we're in a hotel room and they
were clear doors, I couldn't tell that they were closed,
so I would just walk into the door because I
just could not have that depth perception. It's so heartbreaking,
and your parents, like they must have felt so bad.
We just felt so bad. My brother was cracking up.
He was cracking up, and I was just crying on
(12:14):
the floor. But that's what siblings are for, that's what
we're he for. Yeah, that's what they're here for. But
I feel like growing up can be really hard, and
I think it's really cool how you're documenting the struggles
of being a parent because again, it's just not happening much. Yeah,
I don't know if I'm even allow to talk about it,
but I want to do it for you because I
love you. I'm writing a book about pregnancy and like
(12:36):
how bizarre it is and like things no one told me,
you know, So what's the strangest see the open No
one told you about pregnancy because I'm very cure. Um,
I knew like you could have different skin like pimples
and stuff, but I straight up got um perioral dermatitis
where it's like dry rough patches kind of like rosatia.
And I just thought I kept like burning my skin
(12:58):
on products or like the cup brushes I were using
where I was allergic to, so I'd have these dry
patches and it was miserable and itchy, and I was
like what is this? And later I found out like, oh,
it can come with your hormone and balance, and I
was like, oh, so there's like there's really strange stuff
that I'm going to get into in the book. The
women's body is crazy. It's crazy. We're amazing. We're the greatest.
(13:22):
We're the greatest. I grew eyelids. Eyelids, did you know?
Fun fact? That always like blew my mind. You grow
the taste buds and the eyelashes and the third trimester,
whoa sick? Did you ever feel the pressure of bouncing
back after having a kid, because I feel like there's
this big pressure on like snapping back into your same body,
(13:42):
but no, like your body changes. I knew like I
had a goal of snapping back because I also was
my heaviest when I got pregnant. I was like in
COVID gained a fift you know, like I was up.
I was a hundred and eighty five pounds and that
was my heaviest, and and I got pregnant and I
went up to like to twenty and so when I
(14:04):
after I gave birth, he los like ten pounds because
that's the baby. But I got a dietitian after I
was trying to do it myself and I wasn't succeeding
because I didn't know how to work out right or
eat right, and I tried to count calories and it
was miserable, and I was like, I don't want to
hate this. So I got a dietitian and she taught
me like the beauty of healthy food and how few
does food is fuel. It's not just like yeah, it's
(14:28):
it could be a beautiful thing. She taught me how
like we're all burning fires, right, and if your fire
goes out, like you don't eat for a long time,
you're gonna feel angry and miserable. And if you try
to throw a fat log on that fire, like eat
a fat, huge meal, it's not going to make the
fire go up. You're just gonna like give yourself a
tummy ache. So she taught me, like, you have to
(14:49):
eat snacks all day and you have to like always
eat when you're hungry. And I was like, wow, I
thought it was like starve, you know. So she taught me,
I love healthy food and I lost like sick steve pounds.
Now I'm like, I'm like one, wait, I weigh one
fifty seven now and when I was when I got
practice five. So I'm like the healthiest I've ever been.
(15:10):
As long as you feel good, that's what matters. And
something I never thought I would struggle with was food. Yeah,
I would go through those cycles. I think being on
social media really exacerbated it, where I was like, Okay,
I'm gonna work out, I'm gonna eat right, and then
it would get to the point where I also go
c D, which I think dieting for me not good,
(15:31):
and I would be like, oh my goodness, there are
too many calories and strawberry and right when that happened,
I was like, I think we have an issue. Yeah,
it's scary and it's it's it can really mess with
your mind. So my dietician taught me, She's like, we're
not going to weigh this week, it doesn't matter, Like
do you feel good? And I'd be like, yeah, I
feel great. Yeah, And that's how we do it. And
(15:52):
she's just so good. She also specializes with like teenagers
or anyone with a eating disorder. Um. But she told
me to that like a ten year old boy came
in with like anorexia, Like it's it's kind of spiking
again and I think it's social media and it's heartbreaking.
But she's like having her specialized in that too really
(16:14):
helps me out because she makes sure like are you happy,
are you talking to your therapists? Is everything okay? How
is your week been? So she changed my life. Her
name is Christie Christie. She changed my life forever and
changed my bad habits. I wasn't taking care of myself
and now I am that's so important and it's it's
really hard to get yourself to that point to fully
(16:35):
love yourself. And I feel like we're also on that journey.
What advice do you have for little tips and tricks
to get through the day to stay more positive and confident? Oh? Man,
I have I've heard so many things, but I mean
self talk, like being positive. I know it's hard, but
so hard. The more negative, the negative you are, like,
the more your brain heres that like fourteen thousand times
(16:56):
over and over again, so you're just bullying yourself. Um.
And my therapist had me look in the mirror for
five minutes a day naked and just look at myself,
and I was like, I hate this, Like it was
the hardest. Day one was the hardest thing ever. Day
three I was like, huh, yeah, you start, it starts
(17:17):
turning and you see the that it's working. So Um,
it's all starts with you working on yourself and it's
very hard to do, but it's a thing. I'm working
on it every day. That sounds like what I used
to do exposure therapy, where it's essentially just doing your
biggest fears and then just going straight into it. And
it's a fact Oprah Toppy that one. Yeah, whatever scares
(17:40):
you, you you should probably do it, like okay, And I
had to do a TV show right after I gave birth.
I had like, um three months off and which is
like the normal of what they have now because America
is crazy. But I was like, I'm gonna be on
television that like gains ten pounds no matter what. And
it was a food program, so I had to eat
food all day. Top set failed me style to check
(18:01):
it out, and I'm like, I was like pumping during
breaks and then I was like eating their food and
I was like, oh, I was really on a like
on on a program and I was really looking forward
to not doing this. But I'm the only woman in
history who's lost weight on that show. Because it's all
about moderation. That's what that show taught me, is like
I can eat whatever I want as long as it's whittle.
(18:21):
That's a fun fact. Fun fact. Yeah, everything moderation. Yeah. Well,
actually on set, it was like all women and they
were so they took care of me, and one was
pregnant like literally every day. I was like, oh girl,
you're a hero. Okay, let's take a quick break, but
when we come back, I'm going to talk about being
a woman in America these days, all the different thousands
(18:43):
of music you're bringing in your new album, how hard
but beneficial it is, cutting out toxic relationships out of
your life, and so much more. We'll be right fact
and we're back. It's really hard to be a woman nowadays,
especially in America, And I just want to thank you
(19:03):
also for posting and talking on social media about what's
happening with the Supreme Court and Ruby Wade, because it's
more people should talk about it, and it's a really
hard thing. So thank you for saying something. I know.
Thank you. Thank you for saying that I got a lot.
I don't get a lot of hate comments or I
don't look for them, but that one I got a
(19:24):
lot of nasty stuff. And it's not even like hate comments.
This this ship was evil. It was like, well, at
least you didn't abort your beautiful song. And I was like,
oh my goodness. So I turned off the comments and
life is much better. But at that day, I was
releasing my song that day, so I was like, oh,
this sucks, you know, And I wanted to make sure
I wasn't posting about me, and then I was like,
(19:45):
I really have to say something, and this is terrible,
and it's We're supposed to be land of the free
and it doesn't feel like it. It really doesn't. I
did a post it's scary to be a woman. But
hopefully by having these conversations and talking about it, we
can change the stigma that I don't know where it
came from. Yeah, it's like we're going backwards. I don't
(20:06):
get it. I'm in college right now, and I'm very
scared and just I'm an anxious person, but like adding
the social aspect and knowing that my rights aren't secured.
Its like in some places, like birth control is being
taken away, and it's like there's so many medical reasons
why we need all these things and they're not thinking
(20:27):
about that. It's very, very frustrating. And my friend and
I joke all the time, like should we go to Canada?
Like she would just late to go to Canada. Now
there's a dawn devout a house. Um yeah, but it's
scary and hopefully something good will happen because we're just
going the wrong way. Just to switch topics a little bit,
I have really noticed about your music and this next
(20:48):
album is you're changing up the style. You're just trying
out different styles, different dramas, and I love it, yes, ma'am. Yeah,
I was going really pop for a while there because
I love pop and I love this is still pop music.
But I did want to bring in my elements from
my first album. I keep telling people it's like title
two point oh um if title grew up, you know,
(21:11):
and it's so you'll hear like the duop vibes that
everyone loves. And I tried to go songwriting first, So
songs like Superwomen are very like people call my Dolly
parton song um, and that's I was really proud of
that because my whole life, like my favorite thing in
life is songwriting. So when I'm improving there, I'm like, oh,
I'm winning, you know, like I'm doing the best. Like yeah,
(21:34):
I like the practice finally made it through, you know.
And so these songs are very powerful and I think
my best songwriting yet. I know it too because I've
experienced life more and I think there there's that balance
where to write about life you have to experience it
and not just focus on writing. So what has that
process been to not focus on like if the song
(21:55):
is going to be vial, but focus on improving the
writing and becoming the best art is for yourself. Yeah,
I think the best part about writing a whole album
and a project is that you can You can't have
songs like what it's really because I have a platform.
It's like what do I want to say? And then
being a mom, I was like, well, I want to say,
like this is hard and like and everyone was interviewing
(22:16):
me at the time and they're like, you're still positive,
it's so happy and you're like, how do you do it?
You're so confident, And I was like, no, dude, I
write these songs because I'm just in my head, like
I see a therapist every week. I'm on antidepressants, Like
I'm I'm here and I'm working my booty on working
on it. I'm working on it, but you gotta work
on it. And that's My songs are my therapy. Like
(22:39):
my songs are me admitting like not everything is perfect
over here, you know, um, especially bad for me. I
didn't know that would be a single. I didn't know
that the first that's like a real personal thing that's
happening in my family that my family members are like,
that's going first. I'm like, it's like I was just
trying to work through something that her. I'm just trying
to cope over here, I'm just coping. So yeah, this
(23:03):
album had a lot of heart, and I think like
the last song on the album, called Final Breath is
literally um the movie The Notebook, because I tell Darryl, like,
that's how we're gonna die, like holding hands in bed Old.
That's so bittersweet and romantic at the same time. Yeah. Yeah,
So I have an impending doom fear of death. So
(23:23):
that's the album for sure. Oh yeah, yeah, I've always
been terrified. It's the unknown of it. It's the unknowing.
I'm going to like, I'm going to a haunted mansion
with the podcast at the end of this month to
hopefully see a ghost so that I know I could
stick around after I pass, you know what I mean,
And I want to know that I could still chill
(23:45):
with my kids. Do you believe in ghosts? I want
you so bad. I just haven't seen one, but I
love watching the videos online. I'm like, I might be real,
you know, I'm like skeptical, but I'm like, but like,
if it were real, that'd be pretty crazy. I'm like,
that's so wonderful to know that I get chilly here
and haunt everyone. Yeah, that's what I'm hoping for. Manifest, Manifest, Manifest, Manifest, Manifest,
(24:08):
Hunt Forever do you manifest? I guess so, but not
like intentionally, like wake up. Yeah. I'll say stuff like
we're gonna write a book one day, you know, and
then I'm doing it, or like we're gonna have four kids,
four kids for kids, you know that's gonna happen. I'm
always I want twins too, so I get a two
for one deal and I'm like, damn, we're gonna have twins.
(24:29):
And I already had a C section. So there's like
a target like my head. Just open it right back up.
We'll get him out safely, you know. So that's a dream.
Something that I really love about the song Bad for
Me is how honest it is. There are so few
songs that talk about the hard stuff, the hard stuff
and the toxicity that relationships can form. And just because
it was amazing at one point doesn't mean that it's
(24:50):
still meant to go on. Do you struggle with that? Also?
Cutting relationships if it gets a little toxic. Oh my god. Yeah,
I've got it from my mom. Wh just I feel
so bad. We were in therapy yesterday. I dragged my
mom to therapy and she was like, you guys, feel
like you're responsible for everyone's feelings huh. And I was
like yeah, ding ding ding, like I have to make
(25:11):
sure everyone's happy and like and my mom is the
same way, so I got it from her. Um, She's like,
you're not really responsible for everyone's happiness, right, Like it's
not up to you. And I was like, oh, so,
like yeah, this situation when you have a family member,
it's so hard because I've cut off friends and I've
seen the benefits and like seeing, oh my god, life
(25:33):
is so much easier, um and better and um I
think like Meryl Streep said something like that, like if
they're toxic, then they need to be out of your life.
And I was like, I'll do what every say Meryl
Streep and oprah, Um, there's just like soul suckers, you know.
But um, when it's family, it's harder, man, because they're
not chosen and they're they're like they're blood and you
(25:55):
have to see them every Christmas and and it's really
difficult to try to ask them like, Okay, this isn't
good for me. We need space or we need time,
especially when you write out a beautiful letter and get
no response. Like that really sucked, but it it told
me like what I'm doing is right, you know, like
when they show who they are, that's who they are,
(26:18):
believe them. I went through that and I wrote a
letter to a family member a few months ago, and
I never sent it. Really I did because I knew
there was going to be no response, So I just
wrote it and I got all the closure from that.
You know what I have? My team is so smart.
They did this honestly. Um they made a website for me,
a campaign for the song. My therapist told me to
(26:39):
dot co or you can literally go write an anonymous
letter and just like blasted out. That's amazing, so smart.
I was like, we have to take one more quick break,
but when we come back, I want to talk about
how therapist impacted your life, your marriage and going back
on tour. We'll be right back and we're back. How
(27:07):
long have you been in therapy? A couple of years now.
But I got a new therapist that like because that's
the thing. If you have one bad therapy session, you
just like I hate it. My family and my parents
are in that generation where they're like, I don't need therapy.
I'm not crazy. I'm like, you need so much therapy.
It's insane if you're saying that you need therapy. Yeah, exactly.
(27:27):
So I got this therapist though that specializes in like
moms who work and who are famous too, So I
got the Jackpod. Like yeah, she but other than that,
she's like she's such a genius. Everything she asked me
questions like nobody does that in therapy. She's like when
she asked me, like, wow, that's that's crazy. Are you
(27:47):
responsible for everyone's happiness and like their life and how
they turn out? Like it's like maybe, I'm like, but
I could be, but I don't know. Yeah, she's good.
I'm in a new thing is where I'm like, I'm
looking for a therapist. It's hard. It's like dating. It
is like dating, and that was I'm having no luck
in that area either because I have you will I promise.
(28:12):
I heard bumble is really good. I heard bumbles great.
I've tried core stories. Also, like there's still that the
if your friend knows someone that works that works for me.
I asked my friend. I was like, do you know
any guys who are like really nice? I just want
a nice guy. And then I met him. Was like,
we're getting married. I love that story. How long have
you been married for? Now? We've known each other now,
(28:34):
we dated started six years ago. We had just had
our date anniversary July one, and um, we've been married
for three years now. How's how's the marriage life? Is
it different than you saw? No, it's like exactly what
I thought. It's amazing. But it's better than I thought
it would be. I thought I'd marry like some douche
and I'd have to train him. But he's such a
(28:55):
softy and he's so emotional and it's so good for
us because he like cares extra Like on Mother's Day,
he wrote me a card and then he'll write a
card from Riley Like he's he's a softie. He's really
really cute, and he would write before had babies, he'd
write every card from my dogs. It's like I have
Mother's Day, mom, we love you, things to take care
of us. I was like, yeah, he's one of those
(29:16):
so like but now I feel like I have to
preach to the world, like don't settle. There's really good
men out there, you know. It's hard. I feel like
something that has blown my mind at college is that
people only, at least what I've experienced, ask for Snapchat.
Where did phone numbers go? That's so weird, And they
(29:36):
don't even everything is on snap text or Snapchat, and
no conversations are just photos. I'm like, I don't want
to see your face. I'm not even on stampchat again.
I gotta get back on there. I feel like social
media's ruined, ruined, ruined dating because my older brother, he's
like almost thirty, and he's with his friends and his
friends like, oh my god, that girl is so beautiful,
(29:57):
Like I would do anything to date her, and he's like,
gotta say hi, and he's like, what, I can't talk
to her in person. It's like, I'll just like find
her on Instagram. I was like, Ryan's like, oh, no,
go for in person over a d M always just
d m R. Yeah. That's one of the things about
social media where I find if I'm on it for
too long, I need to get off. Yeah, we take
(30:19):
breaks for sure. Something else that I want to talk
to you about is that I know you've written songs
for so many artists. We talked about this in the
last episode. I was very curious to know. Is the
songwriting process when you're writing for someone else, how does
it differ from when you're writing for yourself. It's always different. Um,
recently I've been writing for uh. I don't know if
I'm allowed to say this, screw it. I've been writing
(30:41):
for Judges Siwa and she's my friend, so it's different
that way where she's like like she comes over to
my house and we have a full session and she
gives me ideas and she writes with me. So like
in that world, I'm writing with the artists. But in
other worlds, I'll have songs that are just banked that
didn't really make sense with my album, and I have
(31:01):
a bunch of extra ones um and but some are
so special and they're like, oh God, that needs a home,
and we always say, like that needs a really good home,
so um, we'll pitch stuff like that. Or the producers
I've written with who have those songs that aren't out there,
like can we pitch them? So I have like I think, um,
(31:21):
a K pop girl I think is about to cut
one of my extra songs that I had. I'm like, yes,
more home for them to go to. Yeah, it's so random,
and it's my dreams to write for more artists. So
my team was like, this time around, let's let's write
for you and then let's get take more sessions and
just write for the artists. I was like, I would
love to who's your dream artist to write for? It
(31:42):
could be great for any artists right now, dead or alive.
Who would it be? Well? Nowadays, I just want to
write a song with Ed Shearon because I think it'd
be some medical and Britta mars Um. I would love
to write a pop banger for Dualipa. I feel like
they'd be easy and fun um and who else I love?
I love Tate the new artist. Am I saying that right? Yeah?
(32:05):
Tate McRae, Kate McGray, she was on the plodcast. She's
so cool. I want to write for her. She's so cool.
If anyone wants to sing my songs, that's a dream.
When you're writing for like your friends versus just having artists,
how does that process differ. I'll just try to write
like made the best song win I'll just try to
write a really good song and then then we'll be like, oh,
(32:28):
this sounds like her, you know how like dual lipos
in that disco pop world. If I wrote a disco
pop song like let's pitch out to do a you know,
I would die to write like a Caribbean song for Rihanna,
like a reggae song, And that's my real dreams. I
just want to hear her lullabies that I know. I'm
(32:48):
trying to do a lulla by album too, like a
kid's music, because I've seen there's like the market small,
you know, for these kids have the perfect voice for
it too, I know. And then I can make little
YouTube videos and be like, Hi, we're gonna sing this
song today. You can get like little calming bird animations
of just like I'd be like, that's mama, I think
(33:11):
this needs to happen, and you're right them. I haven't
heard of many like lullaby albums. Um, what's her name?
One girl did it and she did great, The girl
who Sings A a thousand years. I loved you for those.
Christina Perry. Christina Parry, she did an amazing kids lullabye
album that was really beautiful. So I gotta try to
(33:32):
talk back. No, I gotta try to listen to that
and take notes, because she nailed it with this entail
writing like children's songs are going off. I want to
see she did like great covers too, but I want
to do like originals, like I'm sick of um ashes
ashes we all fall down, so dark, all these things
are so dark. And the rockabye baby, like when the
(33:55):
tree has a crat old weld rock and the what
is the lyrics I've never heard when the bow bakes,
the cradle will fall and debil come baby quite Lyndall, Like,
what is scarier than that? Nothing? So I'm gonna rewrite them.
Why was that saying to us as a child that
we're going to It's terrific. There's a lot of really
(34:16):
scary ones, so I'm gonna try to rewrite those and
make them like pop. Would you ever write a musical?
I would love to, Yeah, my dream Dream Dream one
of my other bucket lists dreams besides writing, like all
the music to an animated film that I write is
not for then for it to go on Broadway, And
then I'm just like, wow, my songs are just playing
on Broadway, like, and I don't think I have the
(34:37):
strength to go do eight shows a night and starting
it myself. But I'd love to just be known as
like the songwriter, you know, kind of like a Sarah
Brella's waitress moment following I'm just right behind Sarah following
her would you ever read a children's book? Yes? After
my pregnancy book already got it. It's gonna have textures, dude,
I'm doing it all like you. The xtures. Yeah, that
(35:01):
those are the big hits that My kid only likes
those books and I don't know why because he can't
see poor kids, he felt. Now, does he have to
wear the eye patches? No, we skipped right over that,
I think because it's that bad um. And he just
wears his glasses and it took him like two days,
but now he wears them all the time if he
because he forgets they're on. They're so cute. To check
(35:22):
out my Instagram. I did a video of it. Oh
I saw. I very much saw heartbreaking with the red
hair and the blue glass. Oh yeah, oh yeah, they're
like turquoise see through. I was like, oh, this is
exactly what I wanted. Who picked out those glasses. Honestly,
they were the first ones we saw there and the
guy Michael his great. But I gotta go get like
(35:44):
eight more pair because we're gonna be on the cover
of magazine soon, so I need to get the anti
reflective ones. You know what I'm saying. Boys a star.
I used to have the transition glasses where they turned
into sunglasses when you go outside. See, that's sick. I
didn't know that was the thing. Goggles they're great. They
turn into sunglasses when you're outside, and they get dark
when you come back, and they get normal again. Tight tight,
(36:06):
tight tight. He's also like see through a pale. He's
so white, so when he goes in the sun, we're
like hat glasses cover. So I'm very curious. You have
the album coming out, you have the book. Are you
working on anything else for just for your creative self,
just to fill you. I eventually want a tour because
I haven't sang in front of a crowd and since
before COVID, so I would love to see everyone again. Um,
(36:27):
I'll have a baby this time, so it's going to
be a game changer. UM I do want to tour.
I think a will tour and then um, then I
want to get pregnant on tour the tour bus. Yes,
the tour bus. I will be pregnant, I hope. So yeah,
I'm gonna start trying like a day one of tour,
and we're like, we're gonna make a baby, you know.
So that's kind of great because he'd be like, you
(36:48):
were conceived in this city, period, and then we should
name them that city. Oh my god, I'm like Kim Kardassian.
Oh if you named him, Oh my god, if you
have your baby in Brooklyn, San Francisco, San Francisco, imagine
San Francisco. Thank you so much, Megan, this made my day.
I wish of you. I will literally do this whenever
(37:10):
you want. You just call me. Thank you so much.
All yeah, have me back anytime. I'm ready. Awesome
Host
Sammy Jaye
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