September 16, 2022 • 30 mins
The ladies say ADIOS to season 3 by talking all things back to school. From the outfits, to food their mami's packed them, to bullying, this episode has a little bit of everything for everyone!
We thank you for listening this season and will see you in season 4!
Follow the ladies at @lispanglish, @therealcarolina, @iamhoneygerman
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:05):
I'm Honey German. My parents are Dominican. I was born
and raised in New York City. I love sneakers and
I'm a body positive advicate. I'm Caroline Bermudez, but i
was born and raised in Ohio. I'm a wife, a mama,
and a worker being. This is Life in Spanguish. Can
you believe that we did a whole season, honey? And
(00:25):
this is it? It's insane. It's just it feels so
like it was just yesterday that we relaunched Life in
Spanguish and it's been an entire season. You're telling me, yes,
this has been a journey, and I'm not even kidding.
I was going back and listening to some of the
old episodes that we did, and I say old, but
from the beginning of this season, and we have covered
(00:45):
so much and I feel like our little community are
Life in Spanguish followers and people who listen to us
have really helped us along the way, whether it's you
guys telling us about your issues in the salon or
you guys asking us, hey dive into this topic or
another topic. I mean, we've really covered a lot of
the basis, from from parenting to how do you take
(01:09):
care of your parents in their old age, to you know,
just so many different things, resigning from your job, vacationing
without your partner. I mean, I could go on and on,
but I will say this, it has been incredible because
I've gotten to do it with you. It has been
It's it's weird because like I feel like we have
like a therapy session. Mean you right, And then it
(01:32):
serves our listeners if they're having an issue, they can
just go to the list of all the different episodes
that find exactly what they're looking for. Boom, we're all
having coffee at the same time. You can drink it
over there and we'll drink it over here. Just feels like,
you know, just good chat, definitely, and we always try,
you know, we always try to wrap it up in
a good positive way, give you the best advice that
(01:54):
we can give you. But it it also feels good
to just let people know that we all go through
the same struggles. You're just like me, I'm just like you.
We just look a little different. We might have different occupations,
but we struggle with the same exact thing for sure.
And you know, I think that it's so important for
us to bring up the things that are happening in
our lives because we know that you can relate. You know,
if you're having issues with a friend, what are those
(02:16):
red flags that you need to know in a friend,
or what are some experiences that we've had that maybe
we'll help shed some light on what you're currently going through,
or you know, even social media. We talked about like
detoxing and toxic productivity at work. I mean, there are
just so many topics. And when the family comes to crash,
people talk. Every time I see people are like, oh
(02:38):
my god, that episode of Family Visiting, that's my favorite episode.
I don't know why people love that episode because yes,
because open, because it's all the way real. You know,
we talked about like either having an air mattress in
your living room or you know, just another mattress like
that mom pulls into her room. I mean, but those
are things that we can identify with, you know, that
(03:00):
we have seen in our own upbringing. It is just
it's been an incredible season, but you know when things end,
there are things that begin. And I feel so weird
about ending the season on this note because you know,
back to school. My kids are going back to school,
so for me, it's almost like I gauge the calendar
year as two beginnings. One is January the new year.
(03:24):
Every new year, I say that is the beginning of
the year, right, But then truthfully, back just feel like that. Yeah,
but back to school is like the beginning of the
year for me too, So I always say that, like
my year is split in two because that's the start
of like my new schedule, you know. And I can
imagine the stress that's about to descend upon you. Oh
(03:46):
my gosh, I mean, you have no idea now. It
isn't even like back in the day. And honey, you
told me that when you were in elementary school you
went to how many different elementary schools in the d R. Well, no,
I just I went to all different schools, like from
kindergarten all the way through like my senior year. My mom,
you know, she was that Latina mom that you can't
make up her mind either. She wants to live in America,
(04:07):
she wants to live in Dominican Republic. So like maybe
every single year, Carolina, I feel like I had a
different school, Like I went to school in Harlem. Then
my mom decided, okay, it's time for a better life.
We moved to Long Island. We went out to Brentwood.
Then we're in Brentwood. She has a fight with my dad. Okay.
Then I went back to school in Dominican Republic. Then
(04:30):
we came back. Eventually I graduated in Long Island. But yeah,
back to school was weird for me because I never
knew which country back to school would happen in, right,
and you were probably like just hoping that you would
go back to the same school so you didn't have
to reintroduce yourself to everywhere. That was the anxiety for me.
I didn't. I didn't switch as much as you did,
I remember, and I always went to Catholic school. So
(04:52):
like back to school shopping for us, and my mom
did not play. My mom was like, O, you know, yes,
because we had a uniform. So my mom would just
be like no, you know. And by the way, if
you were that uniform after school and you were doing
your after school activities like running around the neighborhood in
(05:14):
that uniform, you would get in so much trouble because
I had exactly and those uniforms. No, So like my
mom would go nutty on me. So like for us,
it was basically like back to school shopping was a
pair of Penny loafers because we had a dress code
(05:36):
over the knee socks or you know, like up to
the knee socks, your little Peter Pan collar shirt which
went underneath your uniform. And that was it, like we
got the basics. But now it's like, you know, getting
my boys ready to go back to school. And it
was like, Mom, we need a new backpack. I need
um new Jordan's. I need this, And I said, I
(05:59):
don't know. I don't know how you're going to get
them Jordan's because we're about to go get some cat
and jacket target. Okay, honey, because Jordan's are like a
hundred and something bucks. Do that to them. They need
some Jordan wants to go back to school, Carolina, don't
do that to them. Okay. I'm an advocate for brand
new clothes as someone who never got new clothes really
to go back to school. If you got it, you
better splurch on them kids. Carolina. I disagree, man, And
(06:22):
I'm not doing this just because you disagree all the time,
because no, honey, you know what it is. It's like
it's not even you know what I mean. It's more
about like teaching kids like you don't have to wear
new ship to feel good, you know, like I mean
I know that, Yes, that does give you a confidence.
Pressure though, Carolina, just the pressure. These kids dress better
(06:44):
than me half the time. I still have this kid
the other day he had on a fear of God.
I'm like, I could barely afford fear of God this
kid had. He must have been like twelve. I'm like,
this is insane. So it's like, even though there was
pressure back in the days, I'm gonna bring it back
to your childhood really quick. You don't understand pressure that
your parents alleviated by sending you to a school with
uniform because when you're a kid, I'm sure you know
(07:07):
what your kids. But when you're a kid a poor
parents with four kids, you're not getting no new clothes
to go back to school? Girl? Are you getting hand
me downs and whatever your parents could find and like
a drift store or like goodwill. The struggle was real, Carolina,
And guess that's why I'm advocating for it. But the
boys to get all types of Jordan's all types of
gear relax thea honey relax because they listen and they
(07:31):
can hear you and no, no, no, you know I
hear something that lacked them from this episode. I was
talking to my friends. So my girlfriend, Stephanie, she has twins,
and there is no shame in my game, and I'm
gonna tell you why, because I feel like more people
need to be honest about stuff like this. So my
friend's staff has twins and they're taller than Asher, but
(07:53):
they have like the same body frame. They're thin, you know,
they're thin kids, but they're taller. And I said to her,
I was a girl, if the if the twins have
d thing that you think that Asher could use, like
give it to me. I'll let him wear it because
Asher is teeny, right, And so she's like, absolutely, let
me give you some jeans. She gave me sweatshirts, she
gave me T shirts there and I'm sorry, I know
(08:13):
if you roll your eyes, I can totally understand. But
there was so much waste in this world and I
feel like I'm all for it and he probably got
some dope as stuff. That was yes, girl, Yes, he
has like cute little Ohio State sweatshirts that he can wear,
these cute little Tsara T shirts and stuff, And I'm like,
why am I gonna go just for the sake? You
(08:34):
must have loved it too. He likes to. Actually, you
know what, he did bring up something to me because
he said, why does one of the shirts had his
friend's name? Like the mom uses stickers because that's what
we use, Like you gotta put stickers in all their clothes,
like in case they get lost or something. And so um,
he said, why does my sweatshirt clothes the clothes? So
(08:55):
if they take off their sweatshirts they know that, like
some of the parents do that. You have to label
your kids like the jackets or whatever, you know, so
then it's like if it gets left behind, they know
that it's Noah's or Asher's or whoever. And so Asher
asked me the one day and he goes, Mommy, why
does my sweatshirt say my friend's name? And I said, oh, because,
(09:16):
and I was honest, I said, his mommy gave it
to me because you fit in it and you can
wear it. He's like, why am I wearing somebody else's clothes?
And I said, why wouldn't you wear somebody else's clothes?
I said, did it keep you warm? He said yes?
And I said, is it cute? Did you like it?
And he goes yes, and I said, well, that's why
you're wearing it, honey, I said, because I said, we're
not wasteful people. I said, And you know what's going
(09:38):
to happen when we're done with these clothes. We're going
to give them to one of daddy's friends who has
two kids, and they're going to wear them after if
they're in good condition. So, you know, I feel like
the whole back to school mentality. Yes, you want to
show up with your shiny new shoes and you're new.
You know you're gonna break them in and get some blisters.
It's fine, We've all been there. But I think that
(10:00):
now more than ever, it's like there's so much money
and it's so hard for parents who are literally trying
to just like stay afloat to get the kids everything
that they want or that they say they want, just
to keep up with her friends. That's my whole side
of it. You know what I love. I was watching
(10:21):
a documentary on you know, clothing and this disposable fashion
and how it's ruining the planet. They just it was
like mountains and mountains of clothes that people are not
wearing because people buy all these clothes from like let's say,
like she In and stuff like that where at one
time and throw it out. So just by you know,
taking the clothes from your friend and you know, asher
(10:42):
rewearing it, you're doing your part to even save the planet.
Well yeah, I mean I know. That's why I said.
It's like it's so much broader conversation than just like saying, hey,
I use hand me downs. But also it's just like
we've got to take away this like stigma that's attached
to it, like oh, you're poor because you take stuff
from other people. No, I'm I'm smart, I'm responsible, like
(11:05):
I'm trying to do my best. And also I think
that it's a lesson in in building character, you know.
And that's why I said, I that's why I asked
my son, I said, you did you feel good when
you were wearing it? Did it keep you warm? Did
you like it? Those are things that are more important
than just I got some new stuff and I'm gonna
flex for all of my friends just to say that
(11:26):
I did it, you know. So I think that like
just trying to take because listen, I was going to
tell you these little girls are out here, honey, they
are out here in these golden Goose sneakers. They got
four or five pairs, And I'm like, I'm sorry, Listen,
even if I had the money to give my kids
four or five pairs of golden Goose, I don't think
(11:47):
I would do it. I really don't. You're ruining them,
You're I feel like it's a disservice. They're gonna let's say,
a girl, right, she gets all this from mom, she
gets all this from dad, and then you might combine
the whole. Oh, you don't have to work, you don't
have to do chores. Then what's going to happen when
she becomes an adult? Is she gonna have this? You know,
(12:07):
this expectation of like life is sweet, life is easy.
I get everything I want without having to do anything.
It's the service from the start. Yeah, definitely. And I
also think that it's like, you know, the pressure that
parents are feeling now more than ever to keep up.
We're not even just talking about like back to school,
whether it's like school supplies, you know. Now, have you
(12:29):
seen these colleges, honey? I have a friend that took
her son to Texas right for college you're not in
a you're not in a dorm anymore. Now you're getting um,
what is it, disposable wallpaper so it doesn't look like
a dorm, right, You're getting lighting from Amazon that you're
(12:50):
putting up like like high hats, and so I'm not
even joking. They're getting curtains, they're getting flooring. They got
to do their tiktoks and they gotta do their camp
and you can't put him in no raggedy s room.
They need to be able to take their selfies and
everything in a good space. When I tell you about
the skanky mattress that I slept on my first year
in college, when I went in, I looked at my
(13:13):
mom and my mom was like, Imo at the end
that we needed to look for a mattress cover because
my mom was like, we didn't even think like because
back then, you know, I mean, it was a twin bed.
Larrence drove. You tell me a little bit about arriving
at in campus. Arriving at Miami of Ohio as a freshman.
You know, it's total chaos. You've got kids going in
(13:34):
and out. You've got these like egg crates, I guess
they were called. And I had put all of my
belongings in there, and whatever you thought you could bring,
you gotta reduce that by half because you literally have
no space. I need to I need to know your
mom looking around, seeing this new environment that you were
going to be left in, was her anxiety killing her? Um?
(13:56):
You know, by the time I came around, I was
the sixth one. I feel like she had had enough practice.
So like for me, it was more like my mom
and dad wrote me a letter. They're like, you know,
you're a good girl, you know, um, make sure that
you study. Don't drink like your sister, you know I mean.
(14:18):
And then my sister found that letter and she was
so pissed at my parents. But like I also put
it through, like the the whole vision of my parents
at that point had one kid in medical school, another
kid in college, another one in college, and me. So
if you think about the pressure, the financial pressure that
they were facing with four universities, yes, and so that's
(14:43):
where I'm saying, it's like, you know, the whole back
to school conversation. For me, I always look at it
as like, yes, it's the beginning of a new year,
and yes you want new things, and look I'm not
as as bad as I say I am. You know,
I don't think it's a bad thing. But I think
these conversations are important because if you give your kids
everything all the time, what are they going to know
(15:04):
to work for? How will they know if you're giving
five pairs of golden goose and all they have to
do is ask for it, then then what are you
going to do when they ask you for a Mercedes
or see that. That's just kind of like the reason
why I said, Noah asked for Jordan's and I said, look,
that's not happening, and I showed him. I said, this
(15:25):
is how much Jordan's costs. Right, So I said, you
have a grandmother, you have a wha wheta is? My mom?
I said, for your birthday, if you'd like something like that,
I can suggest it to the grandma's. We can see
if they both want to go in on it, if
they want to give that to you, or you can
work for it. If they don't give it to you
for your birthday, then you know this is something in
(15:47):
life that you would need to work for. Well, how
do I get it, mommy? I said, by doing chores
around the house, by earning your money. If the recyclables
need to go out, you gotta go and take the
recyclables out. So you know, it's like those little little nuggets.
It's of lessons that you can give your kids because
it's not just all about showing up and showing out,
you know. And I think that that's where we've really
(16:07):
kind of like lost these younger kids. And I sound
so old right now, your mom, it's it's okay, but
you don't. I've always told you this, like you're a
progressive way of parenting, and I feel like you're very
responsible about who you're going to put out into the
world at nineteen and twenty years old. And we need
more parents like you because it's like you're creating this
(16:30):
child in your house. But guess what when they're twenty,
Guess who has to deal with them the outside world? Work, environment, work,
environment women that date them, you know what I'm saying, coworkers, friends.
So you're doing an amazing job at getting them ready
to be good people for the rest of the world
to have to handle. I mean, I appreciate that, but
you know what I mean, it's a constant, constant struggle.
(16:54):
You know, it's it's always a lesson and everything there's
a lesson, and I know that they get bored of
it with me, and you know, I always tell them, like,
my job is to teach you, to guide you, you know,
to to help you grow not just in your mind,
but your body, your soul, your heart, you know. I
mean those are the things that I was. That's why
I have this responsibility to you, you know. And so
(17:16):
it's like I would not be doing my job if
I don't do those things. But like you know, when
you were younger, you talked about your mom being a
single mom and the struggle and you know, things like that.
But like when you showed up on that first day
of school with your side ponytail, because you know, you
rocked it. What was like, what was the one thing
that you were so nervous about when you would show up?
Um being liked? I guess because I feel like probably
(17:41):
like eight percent of the time I was entering either
a new school or I was either into Dominican Republic
or I was I don't know, it's just always a
new scenario, like are these people gonna like me? Are
these people already going to have established friendships? Am I
going to be accepted. It was a lot of I guess,
a lot of peer pressure type of stuff that I
thought about. It wasn't it wasn't even about the thing.
(18:04):
It wasn't about the learning, obviously, because I always you know,
I was always studious. That was smart. I understood English
and under Spanish. No no no matter what country she put
me in, I was able to excel academically. It was
more about being accepted into, you know, a group of kids,
and kids can be evil. Chids can be cruel if
they decide we don't like the new girl, it's over
(18:24):
for you. Kids can be so evil. You're so right,
and it's like are you in the click? I think
that that was like the thing that was what I
worried about the most because it was like I think
I told you a couple of weeks ago in one
of the episodes that I was always so embarrassed about
my lunch. My mom would not ever give me a
straight up peanut butter and jelly, or like a turkey
and cheese. Are you kidding me? That would have made
my life like she would always give me leftovers in
(18:48):
in a burrito or like you know, people would be
like that smells so yeah, I think the anxiety is there,
and like you never now that you talk about now
that you talk about food, I have like a very
traumatic experience in my mind from when I feel like
maybe I was like four or five. I remember going
to a school. It was in the Dominican Republic. My
(19:10):
grandmother had me until maybe I was five years old,
and God bless her soul. I love her so much.
She would prepare a lunch to go to school, and
I remember walking in and my lona, which is the
lunch box, I dropped, girl fell and open and I
had fried salami and that was everywhere. Girl and these
(19:34):
kids were laughing at my lunch so bad. I still
remember vividly, like the salami rolling. It was just wasn't
the ghetto. Hello happened to me? And these kids, they
were older kids, and they were just so amused. I
still remember the name of the school. It was called Needles,
and it wasn't like me and I love my grandmother
(19:54):
forever and I appreciate her. But my tostes was rolling,
my salami was rolling, Oh my god. And it's just
insane how an instant like that as a child can
forever stay marked in your mind, because I swear to
you I was four years old, so I understand you
about the whole, Like, you know, Latino mom packing up
with mortifying thing and the struggle, especially in America, You're
(20:15):
pulling out this Latino launch it and they're like, what
is that okay about? My mom would give me actually
like um aro indio viejo and like and by the way,
she would pack it at like eight o'clock on the
more or whatever with seven eight o'clock in the morning,
and then I wasn't eating lunch until like like nude
or whatever, and I would open it up and it
would smell like a straight up part bell, you know,
(20:37):
and I would just be like eating for my lunch,
you know. But like even the kids with your salamia,
it's like they had no idea the goodness that they
were missing. You know. It's like the kids are just
so cool. You know. My butt was when of out
things that I was worried about when I went to
(20:57):
school because I always had a big butt. I remember
this kid in fourth grade he would call me Buffalo button.
He drove me crazy that year I was in school.
I remember it was like an elementary I still remember
his name Darryl Dawson, and you know it's crazy. I
found him later on, I as an adult on social media.
He really tried to wrap to me, and I'm like,
the funk? Are you terrorized me? Are you crazy? Isn't
(21:18):
that the way it goes? There was a guy who
called me guerrilla lips, and sure enough he would, well,
you know, because when I was younger, my lips were
like bigger than my face, you know now, yeah, and
so I had these big old lips and I remember
on the bus I had a crush on him too.
He used to be like, oh, look at you. That's
(21:40):
always been lazy. Yeah. And then later on, when I
was a senior and I blossom, then he was trying
to you know, trying to holler at me. So go ahead,
So what happened with you with your boy? And you
didn't tell him You don't remember me as me guerrilla lips? Oh? No,
for sure I did. I called him out. I was like, yeah, no,
I definitely don't have time for you after the way
you treated me as a little kid. But you know,
I told that story to my kids. Now, I called
(22:02):
I called I called this guy out too. I'm like,
are you crazy. You terrorized me in fourth grade, which
means I was like eight or nine, Like I had
no control over the size of my butt, like come on,
and then I grew into it and then it was
a good old fatty landed me, my husband and all.
But when I was nine years old, it was trauma.
Apparently it was trauma. No, you know, I think when
(22:23):
you have kids, though, it's important to tell these stories
and have them see like the effect that it had
on you. Because the other day I did say to them.
Noah asked me. He says, um, He's like, mommy, did
you ever have a crush on somebody and when you
were little? And I said, you do know I did?
And I told him. I told him the whole story
about how like on the bus he would make fun
of me and do this and that and everything and
(22:44):
no one look and he goes, wow, He's like that's
not very nice. I said, no, I go, that's the
reason why you never know. Be friendly to people, I said,
be the friend. Be the friend is like the one
thing that I tell my kids, like, be the friend,
like if somebody is hurting, or if somebody doesn't feel well,
or if somebody you know, you see other people are
like ganging up on somebody. Be the friend, be there
for them, you know. And I think it's so important
(23:06):
for us to remind kids of that, like especially at
the beginning of the year, because that's where you know,
clicks start being formed or you know, the activities start
and then they all start grouping up. Well, this is
my soccer crew or this is my whatever crew, you know.
So um, I definitely shared that with my kids, but
I could see that they felt bad for me, you know,
(23:26):
And I said, it's just you know, you've got to
be mindful of your words. You got to make sure
that you're remember it, yeah, for sure, And he won't
he won't want to make anyone feel the way his
mom was made to feel because you shared this experience,
and it in a world where it's so many kids
are struggling, you know, with mental health, with suicide, it's
important that you know, mothers that their kids know like listen,
(23:51):
don't bully people, don't be mean to people, because it's
just like it just takes four or five kids to
make another kid's life impossible. And they're gonna want to
come back to school and they're gonna be isolated and
they're gonna be having depression anxiety. It's a great topic
of conversation to have before kids head back to school,
because what's happening now with kids and suicide and depression
(24:14):
and all this other stuff is insane. Carolyne. It's not
a thought that crossed my mind when I went to school,
but now it's it's it's scary, it is. And you
know what, you bring up a really really great point,
you know, I always look for those quiet moments, like,
for example, the other day, when I'm taking Noah to
Target and we're running errands and I don't really say
(24:36):
a whole lot. We'll put the music, the radio on
or whatever, and and I'll just say, oh, hey, you
know when you were telling me the other day about
you know so and so what what what ended up happening?
And and it's really just trying to find it's trying
to find ways to talk to your kids, because there's
gonna be a time where my kids are not gonna
want to talk to me, and I have to get
them conditioned into telling me about these things, you know,
(24:59):
because it's like once once you reach eleven twelve, you're
really not telling your mom or dad everything, you know.
So it's like I want to encourage parents to find
those little little entries, right, like whether you're outside doing
something together or like I said, if you're running an
errand and you're in the car by yourself, because the
key for me is to make sure that the other
(25:20):
brother isn't there because then they'll feel like they're getting lectured. Right.
But if I'm just with one of them one on one,
I'll say, hey, why the other day, why didn't you
wanna go on a play date with that person? What happened?
Did they say something to you? You know? And it's
just getting a view into what your kids are experiencing
or you know, what's really going on behind the scenes.
(25:43):
Because if you flat out ask them, it's not gonna
have the same effect. But if you bring it up
like in passing, I feel like you definitely could have
a better conversation and get a better insight into what's
really going on with them. It's like you're having a
mini conversation with them. They probably feel like kind of
like it's an adult moment even though they're not an adult,
and they love to feel like they are adults. The
(26:04):
only thing they don't want to do is spend money
like adults. They want to spend our money, honey. That
is what that is what they wanted. They want all
the snacks, they want, all the food, they want all
the cool gear. And like I said, and the one
thing that you know, I feel like we can definitely
take away from this conversation is like, not everybody is
(26:24):
at the same place in their lives. There are some
people And this is something that I said to know
the other day. I said, listen, there's always going to
be somebody who might be better looking. There's always somebody
who might have more money than you. There's always somebody
whose parents might have better cars than we do. We
live our lives according to what we know. That's their life.
(26:45):
You don't know if their home is full of love
and support the way that we love and support you,
and those things mean more than cars and clothing and
Jordan's and all this other bs, you know, And so
I always try to remind them that at you know,
they come from a home that's just full of love
and security and that's what matters, you know. So having
(27:08):
that dialogue, I think it's just super important. And I
don't know how we got into this. I thought we
were talking about back to school. But but I know,
but sending I guess, I guess sending a kid back
to school, you know, in a good headspace, it's it's
also just as important. You know. It's not just about
the supplies. It's not just about the clothes. It's about
how they're going to interact with their peers and how
(27:29):
they can also make a difference. No matter how little
they are, they can make a difference, either in a
negative way or in a positive way. I love that
it just be one comment. I love that, you know,
get them ready, not only get them physically prepared, but
get them mentally prepared, because now the pressure is so crazy.
I know there are parents that have kids in high school,
and you know, you're facing all kinds of different situations
(27:51):
right now, you know, so it's like being there and
letting them know that they do have the support. You know.
The one thing that I always tell my kids is
that you know, I might not like what you tell me,
but don't hide anything from me. I want to hear
it from you and we'll work through it. You know.
It's like, just don't lie to me, tell me the truth,
and we can work it out together, and I think
(28:12):
that that's really kind of the foundation of the type
of relationship that I want to have with my kids.
You know. But there's parents that I have kids that
are very resistant to talking or they don't want to
open up. So, you know, setting them off to school
with the right mindset, I think that's the key. And
I want to say one thing to moms. Don't let
the memes deter you from sharing those amazing back to
(28:33):
school pictures. It doesn't bother everyone. You know the mos
I love it, And you know what's crazy, Sometimes I'm like,
oh my god, I don't know this person was a mom,
or I didn't know this person had three kids. So
share those back to school pictures. Just be mindful that,
you know, you don't share any information in the background,
like the school or your kids too. But share the pictures.
(28:56):
Let me see those back to school pictures. I want
to see what your kids is out here looking like
I want to see if Noah gets his Jay's. I
will definitely post pictures, you know. I mean, I feel
like that comment was for me because there are sometimes
where I second guess myself. I'm like, okay, another bus pick,
Like where I gotta crop out the school meant but
(29:16):
so much and one year to chair moms and dad's.
I don't want to exclude the dad because the dad's
are just as active on social media as the moms.
Shadows pictures with us. We want to see your kids
go back to Guys, we have had such an incredible
season and we have you to thank for it. We're
going to take some time off, but we still want
your feedback. Please please follow us at Elli Spanglish, keep
(29:39):
us posted about what's going on, and we can keep
the conversation going even if we aren't giving you episodes
throughout that time. And we'll let you guys know when
we're coming back. So keep it on at ally Spanglish
for more updates. And if you're just finding us, I
want you to go back and revisit episodes. We talk
about things that are timeless. It's not like, oh I
(29:59):
don't want to hear old news. It's not gonna be
old news. It's amazing insight, it's advice, you know, it's
it's life experiences, and it's a great wait for all
of us to connect. Absolutely, guys, follow me at the
Real Carolina if you want to see the back to
school pictures and everything else that I have going on
in my life. Ye make sure you follow me on Instagram.
It's I am Honey German. And make sure you rate us,
(30:22):
give us those five stars and leave a nice, beautiful
positive comment because we read those all the time too.
We'll see you next season. Hi, Peace and joy. Lifense
Banglish is a production of Lifense Bangulish Productions in partnership
with My Hearts podcast Network.
I'm Honey German. My parents are Dominican. I was born
and raised in New York City. I love sneakers and
I'm a body positive advicate. I'm Caroline Bermudez, but i
was born and raised in Ohio. I'm a wife, a mama,
and a worker being. This is Life in Spanguish. Can
you believe that we did a whole season, honey? And
(00:25):
this is it? It's insane. It's just it feels so
like it was just yesterday that we relaunched Life in
Spanguish and it's been an entire season. You're telling me, yes,
this has been a journey, and I'm not even kidding.
I was going back and listening to some of the
old episodes that we did, and I say old, but
from the beginning of this season, and we have covered
(00:45):
so much and I feel like our little community are
Life in Spanguish followers and people who listen to us
have really helped us along the way, whether it's you
guys telling us about your issues in the salon or
you guys asking us, hey dive into this topic or
another topic. I mean, we've really covered a lot of
the basis, from from parenting to how do you take
(01:09):
care of your parents in their old age, to you know,
just so many different things, resigning from your job, vacationing
without your partner. I mean, I could go on and on,
but I will say this, it has been incredible because
I've gotten to do it with you. It has been
It's it's weird because like I feel like we have
like a therapy session. Mean you right, And then it
(01:32):
serves our listeners if they're having an issue, they can
just go to the list of all the different episodes
that find exactly what they're looking for. Boom, we're all
having coffee at the same time. You can drink it
over there and we'll drink it over here. Just feels like,
you know, just good chat, definitely, and we always try,
you know, we always try to wrap it up in
a good positive way, give you the best advice that
(01:54):
we can give you. But it it also feels good
to just let people know that we all go through
the same struggles. You're just like me, I'm just like you.
We just look a little different. We might have different occupations,
but we struggle with the same exact thing for sure.
And you know, I think that it's so important for
us to bring up the things that are happening in
our lives because we know that you can relate. You know,
if you're having issues with a friend, what are those
(02:16):
red flags that you need to know in a friend,
or what are some experiences that we've had that maybe
we'll help shed some light on what you're currently going through,
or you know, even social media. We talked about like
detoxing and toxic productivity at work. I mean, there are
just so many topics. And when the family comes to crash,
people talk. Every time I see people are like, oh
(02:38):
my god, that episode of Family Visiting, that's my favorite episode.
I don't know why people love that episode because yes,
because open, because it's all the way real. You know,
we talked about like either having an air mattress in
your living room or you know, just another mattress like
that mom pulls into her room. I mean, but those
are things that we can identify with, you know, that
(03:00):
we have seen in our own upbringing. It is just
it's been an incredible season, but you know when things end,
there are things that begin. And I feel so weird
about ending the season on this note because you know,
back to school. My kids are going back to school,
so for me, it's almost like I gauge the calendar
year as two beginnings. One is January the new year.
(03:24):
Every new year, I say that is the beginning of
the year, right, But then truthfully, back just feel like that. Yeah,
but back to school is like the beginning of the
year for me too, So I always say that, like
my year is split in two because that's the start
of like my new schedule, you know. And I can
imagine the stress that's about to descend upon you. Oh
(03:46):
my gosh, I mean, you have no idea now. It
isn't even like back in the day. And honey, you
told me that when you were in elementary school you
went to how many different elementary schools in the d R. Well, no,
I just I went to all different schools, like from
kindergarten all the way through like my senior year. My mom,
you know, she was that Latina mom that you can't
make up her mind either. She wants to live in America,
(04:07):
she wants to live in Dominican Republic. So like maybe
every single year, Carolina, I feel like I had a
different school, Like I went to school in Harlem. Then
my mom decided, okay, it's time for a better life.
We moved to Long Island. We went out to Brentwood.
Then we're in Brentwood. She has a fight with my dad. Okay.
Then I went back to school in Dominican Republic. Then
(04:30):
we came back. Eventually I graduated in Long Island. But yeah,
back to school was weird for me because I never
knew which country back to school would happen in, right,
and you were probably like just hoping that you would
go back to the same school so you didn't have
to reintroduce yourself to everywhere. That was the anxiety for me.
I didn't. I didn't switch as much as you did,
I remember, and I always went to Catholic school. So
(04:52):
like back to school shopping for us, and my mom
did not play. My mom was like, O, you know, yes,
because we had a uniform. So my mom would just
be like no, you know. And by the way, if
you were that uniform after school and you were doing
your after school activities like running around the neighborhood in
(05:14):
that uniform, you would get in so much trouble because
I had exactly and those uniforms. No, So like my
mom would go nutty on me. So like for us,
it was basically like back to school shopping was a
pair of Penny loafers because we had a dress code
(05:36):
over the knee socks or you know, like up to
the knee socks, your little Peter Pan collar shirt which
went underneath your uniform. And that was it, like we
got the basics. But now it's like, you know, getting
my boys ready to go back to school. And it
was like, Mom, we need a new backpack. I need
um new Jordan's. I need this, And I said, I
(05:59):
don't know. I don't know how you're going to get
them Jordan's because we're about to go get some cat
and jacket target. Okay, honey, because Jordan's are like a
hundred and something bucks. Do that to them. They need
some Jordan wants to go back to school, Carolina, don't
do that to them. Okay. I'm an advocate for brand
new clothes as someone who never got new clothes really
to go back to school. If you got it, you
better splurch on them kids. Carolina. I disagree, man, And
(06:22):
I'm not doing this just because you disagree all the time,
because no, honey, you know what it is. It's like
it's not even you know what I mean. It's more
about like teaching kids like you don't have to wear
new ship to feel good, you know, like I mean
I know that, Yes, that does give you a confidence.
Pressure though, Carolina, just the pressure. These kids dress better
(06:44):
than me half the time. I still have this kid
the other day he had on a fear of God.
I'm like, I could barely afford fear of God this
kid had. He must have been like twelve. I'm like,
this is insane. So it's like, even though there was
pressure back in the days, I'm gonna bring it back
to your childhood really quick. You don't understand pressure that
your parents alleviated by sending you to a school with
uniform because when you're a kid, I'm sure you know
(07:07):
what your kids. But when you're a kid a poor
parents with four kids, you're not getting no new clothes
to go back to school? Girl? Are you getting hand
me downs and whatever your parents could find and like
a drift store or like goodwill. The struggle was real, Carolina,
And guess that's why I'm advocating for it. But the
boys to get all types of Jordan's all types of
gear relax thea honey relax because they listen and they
(07:31):
can hear you and no, no, no, you know I
hear something that lacked them from this episode. I was
talking to my friends. So my girlfriend, Stephanie, she has twins,
and there is no shame in my game, and I'm
gonna tell you why, because I feel like more people
need to be honest about stuff like this. So my
friend's staff has twins and they're taller than Asher, but
(07:53):
they have like the same body frame. They're thin, you know,
they're thin kids, but they're taller. And I said to her,
I was a girl, if the if the twins have
d thing that you think that Asher could use, like
give it to me. I'll let him wear it because
Asher is teeny, right, And so she's like, absolutely, let
me give you some jeans. She gave me sweatshirts, she
gave me T shirts there and I'm sorry, I know
(08:13):
if you roll your eyes, I can totally understand. But
there was so much waste in this world and I
feel like I'm all for it and he probably got
some dope as stuff. That was yes, girl, Yes, he
has like cute little Ohio State sweatshirts that he can wear,
these cute little Tsara T shirts and stuff, And I'm like,
why am I gonna go just for the sake? You
(08:34):
must have loved it too. He likes to. Actually, you
know what, he did bring up something to me because
he said, why does one of the shirts had his
friend's name? Like the mom uses stickers because that's what
we use, Like you gotta put stickers in all their clothes,
like in case they get lost or something. And so um,
he said, why does my sweatshirt clothes the clothes? So
(08:55):
if they take off their sweatshirts they know that, like
some of the parents do that. You have to label
your kids like the jackets or whatever, you know, so
then it's like if it gets left behind, they know
that it's Noah's or Asher's or whoever. And so Asher
asked me the one day and he goes, Mommy, why
does my sweatshirt say my friend's name? And I said, oh, because,
(09:16):
and I was honest, I said, his mommy gave it
to me because you fit in it and you can
wear it. He's like, why am I wearing somebody else's clothes?
And I said, why wouldn't you wear somebody else's clothes?
I said, did it keep you warm? He said yes?
And I said, is it cute? Did you like it?
And he goes yes, and I said, well, that's why
you're wearing it, honey, I said, because I said, we're
not wasteful people. I said, And you know what's going
(09:38):
to happen when we're done with these clothes. We're going
to give them to one of daddy's friends who has
two kids, and they're going to wear them after if
they're in good condition. So, you know, I feel like
the whole back to school mentality. Yes, you want to
show up with your shiny new shoes and you're new.
You know you're gonna break them in and get some blisters.
It's fine, We've all been there. But I think that
(10:00):
now more than ever, it's like there's so much money
and it's so hard for parents who are literally trying
to just like stay afloat to get the kids everything
that they want or that they say they want, just
to keep up with her friends. That's my whole side
of it. You know what I love. I was watching
(10:21):
a documentary on you know, clothing and this disposable fashion
and how it's ruining the planet. They just it was
like mountains and mountains of clothes that people are not
wearing because people buy all these clothes from like let's say,
like she In and stuff like that where at one
time and throw it out. So just by you know,
taking the clothes from your friend and you know, asher
(10:42):
rewearing it, you're doing your part to even save the planet.
Well yeah, I mean I know. That's why I said.
It's like it's so much broader conversation than just like saying, hey,
I use hand me downs. But also it's just like
we've got to take away this like stigma that's attached
to it, like oh, you're poor because you take stuff
from other people. No, I'm I'm smart, I'm responsible, like
(11:05):
I'm trying to do my best. And also I think
that it's a lesson in in building character, you know.
And that's why I said, I that's why I asked
my son, I said, you did you feel good when
you were wearing it? Did it keep you warm? Did
you like it? Those are things that are more important
than just I got some new stuff and I'm gonna
flex for all of my friends just to say that
(11:26):
I did it, you know. So I think that like
just trying to take because listen, I was going to
tell you these little girls are out here, honey, they
are out here in these golden Goose sneakers. They got
four or five pairs, And I'm like, I'm sorry, Listen,
even if I had the money to give my kids
four or five pairs of golden Goose, I don't think
(11:47):
I would do it. I really don't. You're ruining them,
You're I feel like it's a disservice. They're gonna let's say,
a girl, right, she gets all this from mom, she
gets all this from dad, and then you might combine
the whole. Oh, you don't have to work, you don't
have to do chores. Then what's going to happen when
she becomes an adult? Is she gonna have this? You know,
(12:07):
this expectation of like life is sweet, life is easy.
I get everything I want without having to do anything.
It's the service from the start. Yeah, definitely. And I
also think that it's like, you know, the pressure that
parents are feeling now more than ever to keep up.
We're not even just talking about like back to school,
whether it's like school supplies, you know. Now, have you
(12:29):
seen these colleges, honey? I have a friend that took
her son to Texas right for college you're not in
a you're not in a dorm anymore. Now you're getting um,
what is it, disposable wallpaper so it doesn't look like
a dorm, right, You're getting lighting from Amazon that you're
(12:50):
putting up like like high hats, and so I'm not
even joking. They're getting curtains, they're getting flooring. They got
to do their tiktoks and they gotta do their camp
and you can't put him in no raggedy s room.
They need to be able to take their selfies and
everything in a good space. When I tell you about
the skanky mattress that I slept on my first year
in college, when I went in, I looked at my
(13:13):
mom and my mom was like, Imo at the end
that we needed to look for a mattress cover because
my mom was like, we didn't even think like because
back then, you know, I mean, it was a twin bed.
Larrence drove. You tell me a little bit about arriving
at in campus. Arriving at Miami of Ohio as a freshman.
You know, it's total chaos. You've got kids going in
(13:34):
and out. You've got these like egg crates, I guess
they were called. And I had put all of my
belongings in there, and whatever you thought you could bring,
you gotta reduce that by half because you literally have
no space. I need to I need to know your
mom looking around, seeing this new environment that you were
going to be left in, was her anxiety killing her? Um?
(13:56):
You know, by the time I came around, I was
the sixth one. I feel like she had had enough practice.
So like for me, it was more like my mom
and dad wrote me a letter. They're like, you know,
you're a good girl, you know, um, make sure that
you study. Don't drink like your sister, you know I mean.
(14:18):
And then my sister found that letter and she was
so pissed at my parents. But like I also put
it through, like the the whole vision of my parents
at that point had one kid in medical school, another
kid in college, another one in college, and me. So
if you think about the pressure, the financial pressure that
they were facing with four universities, yes, and so that's
(14:43):
where I'm saying, it's like, you know, the whole back
to school conversation. For me, I always look at it
as like, yes, it's the beginning of a new year,
and yes you want new things, and look I'm not
as as bad as I say I am. You know,
I don't think it's a bad thing. But I think
these conversations are important because if you give your kids
everything all the time, what are they going to know
(15:04):
to work for? How will they know if you're giving
five pairs of golden goose and all they have to
do is ask for it, then then what are you
going to do when they ask you for a Mercedes
or see that. That's just kind of like the reason
why I said, Noah asked for Jordan's and I said, look,
that's not happening, and I showed him. I said, this
(15:25):
is how much Jordan's costs. Right, So I said, you
have a grandmother, you have a wha wheta is? My mom?
I said, for your birthday, if you'd like something like that,
I can suggest it to the grandma's. We can see
if they both want to go in on it, if
they want to give that to you, or you can
work for it. If they don't give it to you
for your birthday, then you know this is something in
(15:47):
life that you would need to work for. Well, how
do I get it, mommy? I said, by doing chores
around the house, by earning your money. If the recyclables
need to go out, you gotta go and take the
recyclables out. So you know, it's like those little little nuggets.
It's of lessons that you can give your kids because
it's not just all about showing up and showing out,
you know. And I think that that's where we've really
(16:07):
kind of like lost these younger kids. And I sound
so old right now, your mom, it's it's okay, but
you don't. I've always told you this, like you're a
progressive way of parenting, and I feel like you're very
responsible about who you're going to put out into the
world at nineteen and twenty years old. And we need
more parents like you because it's like you're creating this
(16:30):
child in your house. But guess what when they're twenty,
Guess who has to deal with them the outside world? Work, environment, work,
environment women that date them, you know what I'm saying, coworkers, friends.
So you're doing an amazing job at getting them ready
to be good people for the rest of the world
to have to handle. I mean, I appreciate that, but
you know what I mean, it's a constant, constant struggle.
(16:54):
You know, it's it's always a lesson and everything there's
a lesson, and I know that they get bored of
it with me, and you know, I always tell them, like,
my job is to teach you, to guide you, you know,
to to help you grow not just in your mind,
but your body, your soul, your heart, you know. I
mean those are the things that I was. That's why
I have this responsibility to you, you know. And so
(17:16):
it's like I would not be doing my job if
I don't do those things. But like you know, when
you were younger, you talked about your mom being a
single mom and the struggle and you know, things like that.
But like when you showed up on that first day
of school with your side ponytail, because you know, you
rocked it. What was like, what was the one thing
that you were so nervous about when you would show up?
Um being liked? I guess because I feel like probably
(17:41):
like eight percent of the time I was entering either
a new school or I was either into Dominican Republic
or I was I don't know, it's just always a
new scenario, like are these people gonna like me? Are
these people already going to have established friendships? Am I
going to be accepted. It was a lot of I guess,
a lot of peer pressure type of stuff that I
thought about. It wasn't it wasn't even about the thing.
(18:04):
It wasn't about the learning, obviously, because I always you know,
I was always studious. That was smart. I understood English
and under Spanish. No no no matter what country she put
me in, I was able to excel academically. It was
more about being accepted into, you know, a group of kids,
and kids can be evil. Chids can be cruel if
they decide we don't like the new girl, it's over
(18:24):
for you. Kids can be so evil. You're so right,
and it's like are you in the click? I think
that that was like the thing that was what I
worried about the most because it was like I think
I told you a couple of weeks ago in one
of the episodes that I was always so embarrassed about
my lunch. My mom would not ever give me a
straight up peanut butter and jelly, or like a turkey
and cheese. Are you kidding me? That would have made
my life like she would always give me leftovers in
(18:48):
in a burrito or like you know, people would be
like that smells so yeah, I think the anxiety is there,
and like you never now that you talk about now
that you talk about food, I have like a very
traumatic experience in my mind from when I feel like
maybe I was like four or five. I remember going
to a school. It was in the Dominican Republic. My
(19:10):
grandmother had me until maybe I was five years old,
and God bless her soul. I love her so much.
She would prepare a lunch to go to school, and
I remember walking in and my lona, which is the
lunch box, I dropped, girl fell and open and I
had fried salami and that was everywhere. Girl and these
(19:34):
kids were laughing at my lunch so bad. I still
remember vividly, like the salami rolling. It was just wasn't
the ghetto. Hello happened to me? And these kids, they
were older kids, and they were just so amused. I
still remember the name of the school. It was called Needles,
and it wasn't like me and I love my grandmother
(19:54):
forever and I appreciate her. But my tostes was rolling,
my salami was rolling, Oh my god. And it's just
insane how an instant like that as a child can
forever stay marked in your mind, because I swear to
you I was four years old, so I understand you
about the whole, Like, you know, Latino mom packing up
with mortifying thing and the struggle, especially in America, You're
(20:15):
pulling out this Latino launch it and they're like, what
is that okay about? My mom would give me actually
like um aro indio viejo and like and by the way,
she would pack it at like eight o'clock on the
more or whatever with seven eight o'clock in the morning,
and then I wasn't eating lunch until like like nude
or whatever, and I would open it up and it
would smell like a straight up part bell, you know,
(20:37):
and I would just be like eating for my lunch,
you know. But like even the kids with your salamia,
it's like they had no idea the goodness that they
were missing. You know. It's like the kids are just
so cool. You know. My butt was when of out
things that I was worried about when I went to
(20:57):
school because I always had a big butt. I remember
this kid in fourth grade he would call me Buffalo button.
He drove me crazy that year I was in school.
I remember it was like an elementary I still remember
his name Darryl Dawson, and you know it's crazy. I
found him later on, I as an adult on social media.
He really tried to wrap to me, and I'm like,
the funk? Are you terrorized me? Are you crazy? Isn't
(21:18):
that the way it goes? There was a guy who
called me guerrilla lips, and sure enough he would, well,
you know, because when I was younger, my lips were
like bigger than my face, you know now, yeah, and
so I had these big old lips and I remember
on the bus I had a crush on him too.
He used to be like, oh, look at you. That's
(21:40):
always been lazy. Yeah. And then later on, when I
was a senior and I blossom, then he was trying
to you know, trying to holler at me. So go ahead,
So what happened with you with your boy? And you
didn't tell him You don't remember me as me guerrilla lips? Oh? No,
for sure I did. I called him out. I was like, yeah, no,
I definitely don't have time for you after the way
you treated me as a little kid. But you know,
I told that story to my kids. Now, I called
(22:02):
I called I called this guy out too. I'm like,
are you crazy. You terrorized me in fourth grade, which
means I was like eight or nine, Like I had
no control over the size of my butt, like come on,
and then I grew into it and then it was
a good old fatty landed me, my husband and all.
But when I was nine years old, it was trauma.
Apparently it was trauma. No, you know, I think when
(22:23):
you have kids, though, it's important to tell these stories
and have them see like the effect that it had
on you. Because the other day I did say to them.
Noah asked me. He says, um, He's like, mommy, did
you ever have a crush on somebody and when you
were little? And I said, you do know I did?
And I told him. I told him the whole story
about how like on the bus he would make fun
of me and do this and that and everything and
(22:44):
no one look and he goes, wow, He's like that's
not very nice. I said, no, I go, that's the
reason why you never know. Be friendly to people, I said,
be the friend. Be the friend is like the one
thing that I tell my kids, like, be the friend,
like if somebody is hurting, or if somebody doesn't feel well,
or if somebody you know, you see other people are
like ganging up on somebody. Be the friend, be there
for them, you know. And I think it's so important
(23:06):
for us to remind kids of that, like especially at
the beginning of the year, because that's where you know,
clicks start being formed or you know, the activities start
and then they all start grouping up. Well, this is
my soccer crew or this is my whatever crew, you know.
So um, I definitely shared that with my kids, but
I could see that they felt bad for me, you know,
(23:26):
And I said, it's just you know, you've got to
be mindful of your words. You got to make sure
that you're remember it, yeah, for sure, And he won't
he won't want to make anyone feel the way his
mom was made to feel because you shared this experience,
and it in a world where it's so many kids
are struggling, you know, with mental health, with suicide, it's
important that you know, mothers that their kids know like listen,
(23:51):
don't bully people, don't be mean to people, because it's
just like it just takes four or five kids to
make another kid's life impossible. And they're gonna want to
come back to school and they're gonna be isolated and
they're gonna be having depression anxiety. It's a great topic
of conversation to have before kids head back to school,
because what's happening now with kids and suicide and depression
(24:14):
and all this other stuff is insane. Carolyne. It's not
a thought that crossed my mind when I went to school,
but now it's it's it's scary, it is. And you
know what, you bring up a really really great point,
you know, I always look for those quiet moments, like,
for example, the other day, when I'm taking Noah to
Target and we're running errands and I don't really say
(24:36):
a whole lot. We'll put the music, the radio on
or whatever, and and I'll just say, oh, hey, you
know when you were telling me the other day about
you know so and so what what what ended up happening?
And and it's really just trying to find it's trying
to find ways to talk to your kids, because there's
gonna be a time where my kids are not gonna
want to talk to me, and I have to get
them conditioned into telling me about these things, you know,
(24:59):
because it's like once once you reach eleven twelve, you're
really not telling your mom or dad everything, you know.
So it's like I want to encourage parents to find
those little little entries, right, like whether you're outside doing
something together or like I said, if you're running an
errand and you're in the car by yourself, because the
key for me is to make sure that the other
(25:20):
brother isn't there because then they'll feel like they're getting lectured. Right.
But if I'm just with one of them one on one,
I'll say, hey, why the other day, why didn't you
wanna go on a play date with that person? What happened?
Did they say something to you? You know? And it's
just getting a view into what your kids are experiencing
or you know, what's really going on behind the scenes.
(25:43):
Because if you flat out ask them, it's not gonna
have the same effect. But if you bring it up
like in passing, I feel like you definitely could have
a better conversation and get a better insight into what's
really going on with them. It's like you're having a
mini conversation with them. They probably feel like kind of
like it's an adult moment even though they're not an adult,
and they love to feel like they are adults. The
(26:04):
only thing they don't want to do is spend money
like adults. They want to spend our money, honey. That
is what that is what they wanted. They want all
the snacks, they want, all the food, they want all
the cool gear. And like I said, and the one
thing that you know, I feel like we can definitely
take away from this conversation is like, not everybody is
(26:24):
at the same place in their lives. There are some
people And this is something that I said to know
the other day. I said, listen, there's always going to
be somebody who might be better looking. There's always somebody
who might have more money than you. There's always somebody
whose parents might have better cars than we do. We
live our lives according to what we know. That's their life.
(26:45):
You don't know if their home is full of love
and support the way that we love and support you,
and those things mean more than cars and clothing and
Jordan's and all this other bs, you know, And so
I always try to remind them that at you know,
they come from a home that's just full of love
and security and that's what matters, you know. So having
(27:08):
that dialogue, I think it's just super important. And I
don't know how we got into this. I thought we
were talking about back to school. But but I know,
but sending I guess, I guess sending a kid back
to school, you know, in a good headspace, it's it's
also just as important. You know. It's not just about
the supplies. It's not just about the clothes. It's about
how they're going to interact with their peers and how
(27:29):
they can also make a difference. No matter how little
they are, they can make a difference, either in a
negative way or in a positive way. I love that
it just be one comment. I love that, you know,
get them ready, not only get them physically prepared, but
get them mentally prepared, because now the pressure is so crazy.
I know there are parents that have kids in high school,
and you know, you're facing all kinds of different situations
(27:51):
right now, you know, so it's like being there and
letting them know that they do have the support. You know.
The one thing that I always tell my kids is
that you know, I might not like what you tell me,
but don't hide anything from me. I want to hear
it from you and we'll work through it. You know.
It's like, just don't lie to me, tell me the truth,
and we can work it out together, and I think
(28:12):
that that's really kind of the foundation of the type
of relationship that I want to have with my kids.
You know. But there's parents that I have kids that
are very resistant to talking or they don't want to
open up. So, you know, setting them off to school
with the right mindset, I think that's the key. And
I want to say one thing to moms. Don't let
the memes deter you from sharing those amazing back to
(28:33):
school pictures. It doesn't bother everyone. You know the mos
I love it, And you know what's crazy, Sometimes I'm like,
oh my god, I don't know this person was a mom,
or I didn't know this person had three kids. So
share those back to school pictures. Just be mindful that,
you know, you don't share any information in the background,
like the school or your kids too. But share the pictures.
(28:56):
Let me see those back to school pictures. I want
to see what your kids is out here looking like
I want to see if Noah gets his Jay's. I
will definitely post pictures, you know. I mean, I feel
like that comment was for me because there are sometimes
where I second guess myself. I'm like, okay, another bus pick,
Like where I gotta crop out the school meant but
(29:16):
so much and one year to chair moms and dad's.
I don't want to exclude the dad because the dad's
are just as active on social media as the moms.
Shadows pictures with us. We want to see your kids
go back to Guys, we have had such an incredible
season and we have you to thank for it. We're
going to take some time off, but we still want
your feedback. Please please follow us at Elli Spanglish, keep
(29:39):
us posted about what's going on, and we can keep
the conversation going even if we aren't giving you episodes
throughout that time. And we'll let you guys know when
we're coming back. So keep it on at ally Spanglish
for more updates. And if you're just finding us, I
want you to go back and revisit episodes. We talk
about things that are timeless. It's not like, oh I
(29:59):
don't want to hear old news. It's not gonna be
old news. It's amazing insight, it's advice, you know, it's
it's life experiences, and it's a great wait for all
of us to connect. Absolutely, guys, follow me at the
Real Carolina if you want to see the back to
school pictures and everything else that I have going on
in my life. Ye make sure you follow me on Instagram.
It's I am Honey German. And make sure you rate us,
(30:22):
give us those five stars and leave a nice, beautiful
positive comment because we read those all the time too.
We'll see you next season. Hi, Peace and joy. Lifense
Banglish is a production of Lifense Bangulish Productions in partnership
with My Hearts podcast Network.
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