Episode Transcript
In and live Frex in the morning on C one
oh one. I saw somebody's Facebook post yesterday and it said,
if you want to know what jail's like or prison's like,
go in your bathroom and lock yourself in there for
twenty four hours and then imagine you're there for twenty
four years before you do something stupid with a gun.
And I was like, yeah, but my bathroom's like really nice.
(00:23):
I don't think there's beidets in the prison system. And
then heated seats. I gotta tell you, man, if I
go to somebody's house and they don't have a bidet
and I have to do my business, I sit down
on a cold seat, I'm like primitive. Look man, a
(00:43):
bedey kit, like a heated one. They're like two hundred bucks.
So it's not like, you know, I'm not talking about
a five thousand dollars toilet here, but really it's weird
to me that people use so much toilet paper. Just
get a bedet kit. You can go on Amazon buy
one for like twenty cents bucks. You hook it up.
When you're finished doing your thing, you squirt your heinie
(01:05):
with a little bit of water. I'm telling you it's refreshing.
I think. Don't they make a one called the bob last. Anyway,
you gotta get a bidet kit. They are wonderful. If
whenever we have guests that comes stay with us, they go,
(01:26):
oh my god, I sat down in the seats hot. Yeah,
it's not because somebody just got up. It's plugged in
with warm water to hit you right there in the tudors.
It's quite wonderful. And I just can't. I can't poop
anywhere but my own house. I'll hold it for three
hundred miles. If we're on a road trip, Nope, not
(01:50):
gonna do my business there. I don't care if you do.
Say you have the cleanest bathrooms on earth. All right,
all right, here's how I'll sum it up, having a
bidet versus not having a bidet. If you went out
to a park and you picked up a pile of
dog crap, would you want to wash your hands with
(02:17):
a little thin piece of paper, you know, rolled up
with the other hand to get the crap off of
your hand? Or would you want water? Warm water? Which
one you pick up? Pick up a pile, a nice
steamy pile. Do you want water like warm water to
(02:39):
wash off your hand or thin paper, and then you
walk away. You know, those of you ladies with the
long fingernails, seriously, just get a bedet. You don't have
to worry about. I think I got it. Whenever I
see a girl with long fingernails, I'm like, hmm, not
(03:03):
unless somebody hits it with a hose. I don't think
I can deal.
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