February 12, 2025 • 20 mins
Felipe Esparza always kills it when he comes into the Cruz Show & this time was no different. He talked about his new Netflix special, his wife, his time working at Dodgers stadium & more. He also has a flashback mid interview & explains how he got started in comedy
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
What up is mustle you're checking out the Cruise Show podcast.
Make sure to subscribe right and ship the leap as spars.
That is back on the Cruise Show. So food, what's up? Food?
What's up? Crucial? Doggie? Hello? Everybody doing it? You get
your daughter right here? Now what man crew said, you
gotta pay that support. We can't got your daughter here.
(00:25):
Raging Food on Netflix is out. Now it's out now, man,
go watch it. Man, Yes, sir, bootlegged salad. No, you
don't want anyone bootlegging. Yeah they botleg let me the
way you solid. So that's right, as long as it's
a This is your fourth special, Philip, my fourth special,
and yeah, man, my fourth special, my second one with Netflix.
(00:47):
Oh yeah, very cool. But it wasn't a deal with Netflix.
They didn't come up to me and go, hey, man,
we want a two comedy deal. I had to like
put on my own money and pay for everything and
then started to Netflix's what it takes. So now at
least they watched it, you know, it's fun and like
sometimes they grab comedies specially without watching them and put
them up there like one hour ted talk no jokes.
(01:11):
When I were about me and celebrity hanging out.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
Now, it takes like, you know, you know, putting your
own money in and your own time and uh and
developing it.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
I think that's how they know. You know you're in.
If you're in, then they're in. Right. It's hard, Bro
to like write new jokes, you know. Yeah, it's like
you come up with them, but then like you forget
about them, man, So you gotta write them down just
recording on my phone? That's right? Is that what you do?
Rather you just recorded your phone? How many jokes do
you have in that phone? Bro? That we haven't heard?
(01:42):
A lot Bros going through my now? A lot of
them in funny man, Well they're they're you're working on them, right. Yeah.
I have a joke where I say that I remember
when I was a young man, a kid, I wanted
to watch Ozzie bro like Ozzy Osbourne when I was
a kid, like where my mom said, no, man, he
watches the Devil you know, but now and needs to
(02:05):
buy bats bro like and pigeons on stage. But now
that he's old, do I want to watch him now
that I could afford to watch him? Bro? Old Bro?
Now he's on stage eating a cliff bar. Yeah, he's
sitting down the whole story, the whole show to put
up smoke, you know, because they're gonna wheel him in there.
(02:27):
You know you don't want to see him now. You
know it's sad, Bro, Like the whole show Sponsorbley depends
it's over by four pm. Yeah that does sound kind
of nice.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
Imagine bro, that'd be crazy, bro. But yeah, it's kind
of sad, you know.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
Now. We just want to appreciate him from far away. Yeah, man,
you're just watching him on television. Man, you don't want
your feelings hurt. Hey.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
In Raging Fool, you talk about your dad cheating on
your mom.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
Yeah, bro, I come on, da cheating on my mom. Bro.
The same time he caught memoking weed crazy. We both
just looked at each other.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
You talk about your wife as well, right, and your
wife doesn't mind. I mean I know that you two
are in business together. She's your manager.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
Yeah, man, I talk about how you gotta remember a
smart woman. Man, two dumb people ain't gonna make it.
That's right, that's right. I've been there. Yeah, Man, dumb
couple break up in parking lots.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
Bro, that's right, that's right. Over something dumb yeah, they
can't find a car.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Yo.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Why didn't me and Dan again into a crazy argument
at Dodge Stadium was because we couldn't find the.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Car Meal, Yeah, I know right. You get like you'll
get into a father your whether your loved one over,
like stuff that you would let your friends slide, you know,
like you're like your friend could like make ten horrible
wrong left turns, Bro, and get lost. You want me
(04:01):
one wrong U turn? You're like, you know they're looking
at us. Now, that's so true while you stop in
the middle of traffic.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
Like the smallest shit makes you so angry. I know
why Raging Food, Oh, because I saw that movie Raging
Bull Legendary Classes, and I remember that in that movie
when Jake Lamont, you know, he was done with his
life and he had nothing else to do with his life.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
No, what am I going to do now? I'm not
a boxer. I just came out of jail for serving
young minders in my bar. What should I do now?
He said, you know what, I'll do stand up comedy.
So he started doing stand up comedy, Bro, And I figured, wow,
he had no That's how I started because I had
(04:50):
nothing else better to do, because I ran into things.
I wasn't good at so and this old this old
guy man. And when I used to work at Dodger Stadium,
this guy like he was a teacher full time and
he used to work with me at yoshio Ya at
Dodger Stadium. And he goes, man, you've been entertaining me
(05:11):
for four seasons, for full seasons killing it. Yeah, man,
you should try to be a comedian or something, right,
you know how I wanted to, man, but I don't
know I should try it. And then I told my dad.
Remember I told my dad I want to be a comedian,
and he goes, yeah, And you you could tell when
you meet Paul Driguez, tell him to costide it for you. Wow,
(05:33):
Like just fame is that easy? Bro? Right?
Speaker 2 (05:35):
Exactly exactly right? Were you ever high on stage? Like
really really high? In the beginning, I wasn't. I was sober.
I was sober. I didn't drink or smoke. No, I
was sober.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
But then you know, like people start hanging out laid
with loser comics you know, have habits, you know, and
they're like, hey, man, you want to bump? I thought
you never ask? Right, start staying up to do this networking. Networking,
right right, we should collaborate. That's write a few jokes. Yeah,
(06:08):
you're a mirror in my straw. Let's collab. You know
I never used a straw, man, it's sad. Did you
use the dollar bill? Dollar bills? Yeah, the no, theydn't
have that either, man, ll just rock it up, bro
go all the way, bro that was my habit. Man.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
Yeah, I liked that rocking it up man. Man, look
at him. It's taking them back, traveling back.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
To that maybe twenty four hour laundro. Man. That's right,
that's right. That's a good time for one of those
puzzle because Zuku's even know to know what I'm doing,
just like looking smarty, right right, right. Hey.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
In Raging four, you also talk about getting beat up
in front of your family. That's always tough. Yeah, man,
do I yes, what's in the trailer? Yeah, see we
took him way back.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
Oh that's right. Oh yeah, road rage, I don't come
back from the flashback scene. First, there's so many roads.
There's so many road rages. Brovin won't tell me. I
have to road rage. And like, I followed this guy
who cut me off, and we're both flipping his shoulder off. Yeah.
Then I followed him inside the supermarket. Bro, I'll behind
him at Bonds with my shopping cart. Nah. Now you're
(07:25):
on foot, yeah, bro, now getting close to assault. Never
follow I used to do that.
Speaker 2 (07:31):
I don't know what why, I don't know, I don't know.
But late to work now, bro, right, because he's trying
to die. I'll tell people pull over, full pull over,
they will pull over.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
I keep going, Bro, that's right, that's rights. Watch him
get out of their car and then peel off. I know,
I know that's my dad's move. We're talking about my friend.
The night we got to a fight with this guy
in a range Rover and on Melrose and then we
were honking. Then we both got off and then well
the thrill will looked at each other. This is stupid, right, Yeah,
(08:03):
we were back in our car and we left, so
so we agreed on just being this is stupid, right,
we all say the same time. There we went back here.
I just gave up on the whole thing. He was
like he would killed us, Bro, that's right. He came
out in shape. He was one of the one of
the combat aerobic instructors. That's right, Like those do that
(08:24):
never been to the Armor of the Marines. You know,
Barry's boot camp. There's one of those, bro, They're an
echo park man.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Hey, that teacher that inspired you kind of are pushed
you in that direction? Did he Has he ever been
to one of your shows out of curiosity? Have you
ever got an opportunity to go back and thank him
or anything?
Speaker 1 (08:44):
No, but they run into the people that used to
run that rehab. I run into one of the guys.
He went to my show and Las Vegas back in
the day. What's up, brother, donation now that you're doing well? Yeah, man,
the guy that used to run the rehab where I
was at, he was from this area, from San Fernando
(09:08):
and Proco in my area. Yeah. And then I guess
he was like a bank robber, bro. He robbed all
the banks in Fresno County. Yeah. And then he just
gave himself up to the lord. That's right, that's right,
that's the move. Yeah, that's the move. Re opened up
a rehabit and he must have helped like thousands of
people quit drugs. That's right. Cool.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
My man turned his life around. You know, Phelipe man
takes care of people, you know what I mean? Hooks
people up with tickets. But I've seen it, right, But
how do you feel about people that hit you up
and they're like, yo, Bro, I'm going through this. I'm
going through that, Bro, Please help me.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
It's sad, bro. Like I had a woman hit me up. Bro.
She said that her mom was dying. Bro. Her mom
died and they needed forty five thousand dollars to bury her.
And I was like, damn, did you mama ever make
forty five thousand dollar him one year? Because I think
your funeral should be the amount of money made that
year that after you worked. That would be fair. My
mom was cremated bro, two weeks ago. Bro. Everybody got
(10:05):
to keep her ashes. Wow. Yeah, man, that's why I
want to die. When I died, I want to be cremated.
I don't want to be a burden to my family.
I'm going to get a burden them to them a life,
right right, that's true. I don't want to be I
want everybody to take my ashes with them home, bro,
and you know, mix it up with your weed, mix
it up with your coke. Smoke me, you know, and
(10:26):
then like snort me. Bro. I want to see somebody
bleeding at the after party, Bro, I believe it. That's
a T shirt and let me bro snort me Bro,
they're bleeding, Bro, what happened? Bro? Bro? I guess they
must to cremated him in a cheap PLP bro imanst
to snort it a bone and sad, Bro, like I
had a friend die like he died like in nineteen,
(10:50):
you know, two thousand and two, when I was really
sad and broke. He died over me twenty five hundred dollars. Bro.
I had that mixed emotions that day. Man. That's right,
that's right, because y'all Bro, I remember Bro going to
his mom's house, Bro, and and I was like still hurt,
you know. But after Man, did you're still leave anything behind?
(11:10):
Like an envelope like condina something? That's right? Yeah, Man,
I'm gonna away check in his pockets. Everybody was like, no, man,
he died so young. He died so young, Nah, man,
he died too soon. He too had so much to
give give me. Bro. They were were bury this fool
(11:34):
his cell phone, No, Bro, they kept ringing during the
to the funeral. They shouldn't let me have it, Bro,
just to hear message. What happened Julio, you left all
mad with my motorcycle helmet you were rather you took
off all married mona. You know, hikes, Bro, what happened?
(11:54):
What happened? Bro? We miss you hey? After we saw
you were scoring on one of the water red in that
Asla neighborhood.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
Would you have settled to snort him?
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Now? Bro? To probably like cut his ashes? Brother? How
much gold he had in his teeth? Bro? First? Right,
that's right? For sure? Yo.
Speaker 2 (12:15):
Your wife is educated, right, She's got degrees on top
of degrees?
Speaker 1 (12:18):
Right? Is that? Is that ever intimidating? Yeah? Bro, I
don't even have I don't even have a pedigree. Bro Right, Yeah,
my wife a bachelor's degree and a master's degree. Crazy,
that's right, So I don't have to google anything, bro,
Just go ask her, ask her. She's got the answer.
I'm like a five year old. Why is this guy blue?
(12:40):
Why is the sky blue? I look up? Like random?
She's like, why are eggs white? How? A? My wife like?
Why do why am I? Why do I? Why am
I six foot one but my legs are twenty eight? Right?
Doesn't make sense? Right? Yeah? Man, I'm not a tall Perton.
I'm a tall little person for real. Bro, That's what
(13:04):
when you look at my body and you see six
foot one and you see that I have a very
large tour, So like, yeah, if it looks like I'm
standing up right now, you are tall. But when I
when I when I stand up on the same height,
that's short legs. Bro. That means that we were called knights,
Bro because the Mayans. You know, the after there were
Shore Bro little Warriors five foot two, five three, you know,
(13:26):
then the Mayans came in bright six two. You know Spaniards. Bro.
It's like mixing that you wa the pet bull Bro.
That's right, because I have like a great Dane body, Bro,
But I have a legs, That's right. They look long though,
I'm like a centaur. Bro. Are you excited about the Dodgers? Yeah? Man,
(13:50):
I went to one game last year. One game, yeah, man,
right behind home play Bro. That's right. What it was
season on? Bro? Like how great it was to be
back on top again? Man? Man, Man, I'm so glad
man because can I remember like the eighty eight World
Series and then this one. Bro. I remember when Kirk
Gibson hit that home run. Bro. Every time I had sex,
I was like, come, on, come on, that's right, that's right.
(14:13):
With a bad leg too, come on with a bump leg.
I remember wh when the Dodgers lost ninety nine games Bro,
back in the day Bro and Tammy Soda. Was he
lost like ninety eight pounds? Bro? Because of us? He
was doing those Jenny Craig commercials right right, like when
I first started writing jokes, you know, and I wanted
to be a comedian. He goes, Man, Tamalo Soda loses
(14:34):
ninety eight pounds and the Dodger lose one hundred games.
He goes on that Jenny Craig, Man, he should start
eating a game. Bro, bring back Tommy Lasagna right right,
breaking back. Have you ever thrown out the first pitch? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (14:48):
Bro?
Speaker 1 (14:48):
In two thousand and ten, Yeah, I threw out the
first twenty eleven, I threw out the first pitch when
I won last Comic Standing. Oh very cool. Yeah man,
it was good. Bro. I'll practice in the Allegian Park
all day and I was practicing my knuckleball because I
wanted to throw a knuckle And when I get there,
it's a mound, bro. Yes. And if you grew up
(15:10):
in the inner City, you never pasted on a mound ever,
not even a cardboard box. I did it. It's like,
what am I doing? You're throwing down? Yes, I mean
were you two like throwing straight right? Yeah, you know kickball,
you know straight right, But this is like up on
a hill, bro. Yeah yeah, man, Larry yees a rich
(15:31):
man sport. That's right.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
I heard a story about you and last comic same
You won, and then immediately you had to go on
tour with the guys that lost, and you guys are
stuck on a bus and everybody like was looking at you.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
You know, they were upset because you won. They were
all saddy.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
They were all sad because every comedians are so competitive.
And then you bought like the driver a jacket or something,
and then they realized, oh man, he's just a normal guy.
Speaker 1 (15:54):
He's a nice guy. He's not an asshole. Yeah man, right. Yeah.
We're on the bus, all six of us touring bro
eighty five cities, and I was a headliner at every show.
But we're all doing the same amount of time twenty minutes,
and a lot of them thought that the show was
rid or whatever. Yeah, you know, but I won, And
(16:16):
because I remember the guy that in charge of NBC
Universal was when they merged. It was the main guy
that was in charge of We're gonna put Friends on
Tuesday nights. We're gonna put whatever show after Wednesday. That dude, Bro,
the big shot he got. He came, he came out
of the corner after I won, and he goes Philippe,
(16:38):
you know, big Columbian accident. He goes congratulations. I don't
know if you noticed, but you know, we had big
ratings in cities that we normally don't get big ratings.
You know, the show because I was on but like
Pacific Northwest, Bro, like Seattle, nobody watches the NBC over there,
but they were watching it that day. They had like
(17:00):
eleven point two million people watching it. When I want cool,
that's crazy. Sure it was sad people, Bro, Yeah, sad.
There was one time where we went to his place
in the middle of nowhere, Bro, like Allentown, Pennsylvania. I've
only heard that in songs, Bro, with Billy Joe Shining
(17:23):
down the plant in Allentown Billy Joe's song. They were like,
get there, Bro, and then running a front. There was
like these old be Hito, these old Polish couple, Bro,
like the seventies and they were wearing t shirts that
said Team Phelippe. So cool, and I'm like, whoa, bro
(17:43):
I crossed over? But like PARTRICI said, bro. I asked
the one time man, how do you cross over your
jokes so that everyone in America can understand them, not
just some black people and Mexicans. And he goes, Wow,
you don't gonna worry about that, because if you're fun,
you go across over to you. That's right, that's right.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
Hey, speaking of TV, I saw you on Shifting Gears.
Speaker 1 (18:05):
Hell yeah, bro Man.
Speaker 3 (18:07):
I was like, hey, look at Philip Man. That's a
good show. It's a funny, funny sitcom. Did you work
with Tim Allen? And then how was that?
Speaker 1 (18:14):
Dude? He is og Man. My friend Morgan Murphy, she's
a writer on the show, and she wrote me in
one of the characters, Bob and Man. I never worked
on a multi camera, only works single cam because I'm
super stared with one camera and they just follow you
around and there's that camera everywhere, so you really got
(18:35):
to do it that many takes. But on that one
it's like a play. You know, every every scene is
in a different room, so all they do is shift
the camera to the next place and then you move
your body over there and you act right there. So
that like a play. And I don't know that about
cars to choose. My wife knows everything about cars too, too,
(18:57):
like my besides acting, Oh I what's concerned about was
not scratching Tim Allen's covered buckle. There you go, there
you go, Bro. I had. I had a hammer and
a screwdriver, bro, and I was pretending I was fixing
something in there. Bro. And then Tim Allen's daughter, she's
like a technical advisor and she she's in charge of
(19:18):
all of the cars. She told me so she knew
the scene and she said you have to hold this
too and this too if you're gonna go in there
like that. And then I was holding a hammer, Bro,
and U and a screwdriver. Bro. I was like a transmission. Bro.
You know when if I look at the gasoline and
trying to start, it look like you were trying to
(19:39):
steal it. I know. Boom, Let's go Felipe.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
As far as a raging food on Netflix, now, it's
just for a special, you know, Philpople, We love you
here man, thank you very much for your time.
Speaker 1 (19:50):
We're having me Fool. What's up everybody? Check out Raging
Fool and check out my podcast What's Up Food and
the History for Foods podcasts where you can learn about
history and laugh. That's right.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Yeah, it's it's it's it's comedy and history all in one, right.
Speaker 1 (20:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:07):
Bro.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
We talk about a lot of stuff, bro, like the
history of stand up comedy, the history of Native American
stand up comedy. We had a real estate problem and
that's the name of the book. And we had the
history of the Irish Uprising of nineteen sixteen. That's right,
that's right, that's right. The history of serial killers. I
(20:30):
love that, love that. Yeah, man, Jackie is a big
fan of that.
Speaker 2 (20:33):
Felippe Spars appreciated man, Netflix, Raging Food, Let's go What's
Up Food?
Speaker 1 (20:38):
Hey Jackie Ridge.
Speaker 2 (20:39):
For the Cruise Show.
Speaker 1 (20:40):
Thanks for listening to The Cruise Show podcast. Make sure
to subscribe and hey, auto download so you don't miss
an episode.
What up is mustle you're checking out the Cruise Show podcast.
Make sure to subscribe right and ship the leap as spars.
That is back on the Cruise Show. So food, what's up? Food?
What's up? Crucial? Doggie? Hello? Everybody doing it? You get
your daughter right here? Now what man crew said, you
gotta pay that support. We can't got your daughter here.
(00:25):
Raging Food on Netflix is out. Now it's out now, man,
go watch it. Man, Yes, sir, bootlegged salad. No, you
don't want anyone bootlegging. Yeah they botleg let me the
way you solid. So that's right, as long as it's
a This is your fourth special, Philip, my fourth special,
and yeah, man, my fourth special, my second one with Netflix.
(00:47):
Oh yeah, very cool. But it wasn't a deal with Netflix.
They didn't come up to me and go, hey, man,
we want a two comedy deal. I had to like
put on my own money and pay for everything and
then started to Netflix's what it takes. So now at
least they watched it, you know, it's fun and like
sometimes they grab comedies specially without watching them and put
them up there like one hour ted talk no jokes.
(01:11):
When I were about me and celebrity hanging out.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
Now, it takes like, you know, you know, putting your
own money in and your own time and uh and
developing it.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
I think that's how they know. You know you're in.
If you're in, then they're in. Right. It's hard, Bro
to like write new jokes, you know. Yeah, it's like
you come up with them, but then like you forget
about them, man, So you gotta write them down just
recording on my phone? That's right? Is that what you do?
Rather you just recorded your phone? How many jokes do
you have in that phone? Bro? That we haven't heard?
(01:42):
A lot Bros going through my now? A lot of
them in funny man, Well they're they're you're working on them, right. Yeah.
I have a joke where I say that I remember
when I was a young man, a kid, I wanted
to watch Ozzie bro like Ozzy Osbourne when I was
a kid, like where my mom said, no, man, he
watches the Devil you know, but now and needs to
(02:05):
buy bats bro like and pigeons on stage. But now
that he's old, do I want to watch him now
that I could afford to watch him? Bro? Old Bro?
Now he's on stage eating a cliff bar. Yeah, he's
sitting down the whole story, the whole show to put
up smoke, you know, because they're gonna wheel him in there.
(02:27):
You know you don't want to see him now. You
know it's sad, Bro, Like the whole show Sponsorbley depends
it's over by four pm. Yeah that does sound kind
of nice.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
Imagine bro, that'd be crazy, bro. But yeah, it's kind
of sad, you know.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
Now. We just want to appreciate him from far away. Yeah, man,
you're just watching him on television. Man, you don't want
your feelings hurt. Hey.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
In Raging Fool, you talk about your dad cheating on
your mom.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
Yeah, bro, I come on, da cheating on my mom. Bro.
The same time he caught memoking weed crazy. We both
just looked at each other.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
You talk about your wife as well, right, and your
wife doesn't mind. I mean I know that you two
are in business together. She's your manager.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
Yeah, man, I talk about how you gotta remember a
smart woman. Man, two dumb people ain't gonna make it.
That's right, that's right. I've been there. Yeah, Man, dumb
couple break up in parking lots.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
Bro, that's right, that's right. Over something dumb yeah, they
can't find a car.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Yo.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Why didn't me and Dan again into a crazy argument
at Dodge Stadium was because we couldn't find the.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Car Meal, Yeah, I know right. You get like you'll
get into a father your whether your loved one over,
like stuff that you would let your friends slide, you know,
like you're like your friend could like make ten horrible
wrong left turns, Bro, and get lost. You want me
(04:01):
one wrong U turn? You're like, you know they're looking
at us. Now, that's so true while you stop in
the middle of traffic.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
Like the smallest shit makes you so angry. I know
why Raging Food, Oh, because I saw that movie Raging
Bull Legendary Classes, and I remember that in that movie
when Jake Lamont, you know, he was done with his
life and he had nothing else to do with his life.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
No, what am I going to do now? I'm not
a boxer. I just came out of jail for serving
young minders in my bar. What should I do now?
He said, you know what, I'll do stand up comedy.
So he started doing stand up comedy, Bro, And I figured, wow,
he had no That's how I started because I had
(04:50):
nothing else better to do, because I ran into things.
I wasn't good at so and this old this old
guy man. And when I used to work at Dodger Stadium,
this guy like he was a teacher full time and
he used to work with me at yoshio Ya at
Dodger Stadium. And he goes, man, you've been entertaining me
(05:11):
for four seasons, for full seasons killing it. Yeah, man,
you should try to be a comedian or something, right,
you know how I wanted to, man, but I don't
know I should try it. And then I told my dad.
Remember I told my dad I want to be a comedian,
and he goes, yeah, And you you could tell when
you meet Paul Driguez, tell him to costide it for you. Wow,
(05:33):
Like just fame is that easy? Bro? Right?
Speaker 2 (05:35):
Exactly exactly right? Were you ever high on stage? Like
really really high? In the beginning, I wasn't. I was sober.
I was sober. I didn't drink or smoke. No, I
was sober.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
But then you know, like people start hanging out laid
with loser comics you know, have habits, you know, and
they're like, hey, man, you want to bump? I thought
you never ask? Right, start staying up to do this networking. Networking,
right right, we should collaborate. That's write a few jokes. Yeah,
(06:08):
you're a mirror in my straw. Let's collab. You know
I never used a straw, man, it's sad. Did you
use the dollar bill? Dollar bills? Yeah, the no, theydn't
have that either, man, ll just rock it up, bro
go all the way, bro that was my habit. Man.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
Yeah, I liked that rocking it up man. Man, look
at him. It's taking them back, traveling back.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
To that maybe twenty four hour laundro. Man. That's right,
that's right. That's a good time for one of those
puzzle because Zuku's even know to know what I'm doing,
just like looking smarty, right right, right. Hey.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
In Raging four, you also talk about getting beat up
in front of your family. That's always tough. Yeah, man,
do I yes, what's in the trailer? Yeah, see we
took him way back.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
Oh that's right. Oh yeah, road rage, I don't come
back from the flashback scene. First, there's so many roads.
There's so many road rages. Brovin won't tell me. I
have to road rage. And like, I followed this guy
who cut me off, and we're both flipping his shoulder off. Yeah.
Then I followed him inside the supermarket. Bro, I'll behind
him at Bonds with my shopping cart. Nah. Now you're
(07:25):
on foot, yeah, bro, now getting close to assault. Never
follow I used to do that.
Speaker 2 (07:31):
I don't know what why, I don't know, I don't know.
But late to work now, bro, right, because he's trying
to die. I'll tell people pull over, full pull over,
they will pull over.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
I keep going, Bro, that's right, that's rights. Watch him
get out of their car and then peel off. I know,
I know that's my dad's move. We're talking about my friend.
The night we got to a fight with this guy
in a range Rover and on Melrose and then we
were honking. Then we both got off and then well
the thrill will looked at each other. This is stupid, right, Yeah,
(08:03):
we were back in our car and we left, so
so we agreed on just being this is stupid, right,
we all say the same time. There we went back here.
I just gave up on the whole thing. He was
like he would killed us, Bro, that's right. He came
out in shape. He was one of the one of
the combat aerobic instructors. That's right, Like those do that
(08:24):
never been to the Armor of the Marines. You know,
Barry's boot camp. There's one of those, bro, They're an
echo park man.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Hey, that teacher that inspired you kind of are pushed
you in that direction? Did he Has he ever been
to one of your shows out of curiosity? Have you
ever got an opportunity to go back and thank him
or anything?
Speaker 1 (08:44):
No, but they run into the people that used to
run that rehab. I run into one of the guys.
He went to my show and Las Vegas back in
the day. What's up, brother, donation now that you're doing well? Yeah, man,
the guy that used to run the rehab where I
was at, he was from this area, from San Fernando
(09:08):
and Proco in my area. Yeah. And then I guess
he was like a bank robber, bro. He robbed all
the banks in Fresno County. Yeah. And then he just
gave himself up to the lord. That's right, that's right,
that's the move. Yeah, that's the move. Re opened up
a rehabit and he must have helped like thousands of
people quit drugs. That's right. Cool.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
My man turned his life around. You know, Phelipe man
takes care of people, you know what I mean? Hooks
people up with tickets. But I've seen it, right, But
how do you feel about people that hit you up
and they're like, yo, Bro, I'm going through this. I'm
going through that, Bro, Please help me.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
It's sad, bro. Like I had a woman hit me up. Bro.
She said that her mom was dying. Bro. Her mom
died and they needed forty five thousand dollars to bury her.
And I was like, damn, did you mama ever make
forty five thousand dollar him one year? Because I think
your funeral should be the amount of money made that
year that after you worked. That would be fair. My
mom was cremated bro, two weeks ago. Bro. Everybody got
(10:05):
to keep her ashes. Wow. Yeah, man, that's why I
want to die. When I died, I want to be cremated.
I don't want to be a burden to my family.
I'm going to get a burden them to them a life,
right right, that's true. I don't want to be I
want everybody to take my ashes with them home, bro,
and you know, mix it up with your weed, mix
it up with your coke. Smoke me, you know, and
(10:26):
then like snort me. Bro. I want to see somebody
bleeding at the after party, Bro, I believe it. That's
a T shirt and let me bro snort me Bro,
they're bleeding, Bro, what happened? Bro? Bro? I guess they
must to cremated him in a cheap PLP bro imanst
to snort it a bone and sad, Bro, like I
had a friend die like he died like in nineteen,
(10:50):
you know, two thousand and two, when I was really
sad and broke. He died over me twenty five hundred dollars. Bro.
I had that mixed emotions that day. Man. That's right,
that's right, because y'all Bro, I remember Bro going to
his mom's house, Bro, and and I was like still hurt,
you know. But after Man, did you're still leave anything behind?
(11:10):
Like an envelope like condina something? That's right? Yeah, Man,
I'm gonna away check in his pockets. Everybody was like, no, man,
he died so young. He died so young, Nah, man,
he died too soon. He too had so much to
give give me. Bro. They were were bury this fool
(11:34):
his cell phone, No, Bro, they kept ringing during the
to the funeral. They shouldn't let me have it, Bro,
just to hear message. What happened Julio, you left all
mad with my motorcycle helmet you were rather you took
off all married mona. You know, hikes, Bro, what happened?
(11:54):
What happened? Bro? We miss you hey? After we saw
you were scoring on one of the water red in that
Asla neighborhood.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
Would you have settled to snort him?
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Now? Bro? To probably like cut his ashes? Brother? How
much gold he had in his teeth? Bro? First? Right,
that's right? For sure? Yo.
Speaker 2 (12:15):
Your wife is educated, right, She's got degrees on top
of degrees?
Speaker 1 (12:18):
Right? Is that? Is that ever intimidating? Yeah? Bro, I
don't even have I don't even have a pedigree. Bro Right, Yeah,
my wife a bachelor's degree and a master's degree. Crazy,
that's right, So I don't have to google anything, bro,
Just go ask her, ask her. She's got the answer.
I'm like a five year old. Why is this guy blue?
(12:40):
Why is the sky blue? I look up? Like random?
She's like, why are eggs white? How? A? My wife like?
Why do why am I? Why do I? Why am
I six foot one but my legs are twenty eight? Right?
Doesn't make sense? Right? Yeah? Man, I'm not a tall Perton.
I'm a tall little person for real. Bro, That's what
(13:04):
when you look at my body and you see six
foot one and you see that I have a very
large tour, So like, yeah, if it looks like I'm
standing up right now, you are tall. But when I
when I when I stand up on the same height,
that's short legs. Bro. That means that we were called knights,
Bro because the Mayans. You know, the after there were
Shore Bro little Warriors five foot two, five three, you know,
(13:26):
then the Mayans came in bright six two. You know Spaniards. Bro.
It's like mixing that you wa the pet bull Bro.
That's right, because I have like a great Dane body, Bro,
But I have a legs, That's right. They look long though,
I'm like a centaur. Bro. Are you excited about the Dodgers? Yeah? Man,
(13:50):
I went to one game last year. One game, yeah, man,
right behind home play Bro. That's right. What it was
season on? Bro? Like how great it was to be
back on top again? Man? Man, Man, I'm so glad
man because can I remember like the eighty eight World
Series and then this one. Bro. I remember when Kirk
Gibson hit that home run. Bro. Every time I had sex,
I was like, come, on, come on, that's right, that's right.
(14:13):
With a bad leg too, come on with a bump leg.
I remember wh when the Dodgers lost ninety nine games Bro,
back in the day Bro and Tammy Soda. Was he
lost like ninety eight pounds? Bro? Because of us? He
was doing those Jenny Craig commercials right right, like when
I first started writing jokes, you know, and I wanted
to be a comedian. He goes, Man, Tamalo Soda loses
(14:34):
ninety eight pounds and the Dodger lose one hundred games.
He goes on that Jenny Craig, Man, he should start
eating a game. Bro, bring back Tommy Lasagna right right,
breaking back. Have you ever thrown out the first pitch? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (14:48):
Bro?
Speaker 1 (14:48):
In two thousand and ten, Yeah, I threw out the
first twenty eleven, I threw out the first pitch when
I won last Comic Standing. Oh very cool. Yeah man,
it was good. Bro. I'll practice in the Allegian Park
all day and I was practicing my knuckleball because I
wanted to throw a knuckle And when I get there,
it's a mound, bro. Yes. And if you grew up
(15:10):
in the inner City, you never pasted on a mound ever,
not even a cardboard box. I did it. It's like,
what am I doing? You're throwing down? Yes, I mean
were you two like throwing straight right? Yeah, you know kickball,
you know straight right, But this is like up on
a hill, bro. Yeah yeah, man, Larry yees a rich
(15:31):
man sport. That's right.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
I heard a story about you and last comic same
You won, and then immediately you had to go on
tour with the guys that lost, and you guys are
stuck on a bus and everybody like was looking at you.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
You know, they were upset because you won. They were
all saddy.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
They were all sad because every comedians are so competitive.
And then you bought like the driver a jacket or something,
and then they realized, oh man, he's just a normal guy.
Speaker 1 (15:54):
He's a nice guy. He's not an asshole. Yeah man, right. Yeah.
We're on the bus, all six of us touring bro
eighty five cities, and I was a headliner at every show.
But we're all doing the same amount of time twenty minutes,
and a lot of them thought that the show was
rid or whatever. Yeah, you know, but I won, And
(16:16):
because I remember the guy that in charge of NBC
Universal was when they merged. It was the main guy
that was in charge of We're gonna put Friends on
Tuesday nights. We're gonna put whatever show after Wednesday. That dude, Bro,
the big shot he got. He came, he came out
of the corner after I won, and he goes Philippe,
(16:38):
you know, big Columbian accident. He goes congratulations. I don't
know if you noticed, but you know, we had big
ratings in cities that we normally don't get big ratings.
You know, the show because I was on but like
Pacific Northwest, Bro, like Seattle, nobody watches the NBC over there,
but they were watching it that day. They had like
(17:00):
eleven point two million people watching it. When I want cool,
that's crazy. Sure it was sad people, Bro, Yeah, sad.
There was one time where we went to his place
in the middle of nowhere, Bro, like Allentown, Pennsylvania. I've
only heard that in songs, Bro, with Billy Joe Shining
(17:23):
down the plant in Allentown Billy Joe's song. They were like,
get there, Bro, and then running a front. There was
like these old be Hito, these old Polish couple, Bro,
like the seventies and they were wearing t shirts that
said Team Phelippe. So cool, and I'm like, whoa, bro
(17:43):
I crossed over? But like PARTRICI said, bro. I asked
the one time man, how do you cross over your
jokes so that everyone in America can understand them, not
just some black people and Mexicans. And he goes, Wow,
you don't gonna worry about that, because if you're fun,
you go across over to you. That's right, that's right.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
Hey, speaking of TV, I saw you on Shifting Gears.
Speaker 1 (18:05):
Hell yeah, bro Man.
Speaker 3 (18:07):
I was like, hey, look at Philip Man. That's a
good show. It's a funny, funny sitcom. Did you work
with Tim Allen? And then how was that?
Speaker 1 (18:14):
Dude? He is og Man. My friend Morgan Murphy, she's
a writer on the show, and she wrote me in
one of the characters, Bob and Man. I never worked
on a multi camera, only works single cam because I'm
super stared with one camera and they just follow you
around and there's that camera everywhere, so you really got
(18:35):
to do it that many takes. But on that one
it's like a play. You know, every every scene is
in a different room, so all they do is shift
the camera to the next place and then you move
your body over there and you act right there. So
that like a play. And I don't know that about
cars to choose. My wife knows everything about cars too, too,
(18:57):
like my besides acting, Oh I what's concerned about was
not scratching Tim Allen's covered buckle. There you go, there
you go, Bro. I had. I had a hammer and
a screwdriver, bro, and I was pretending I was fixing
something in there. Bro. And then Tim Allen's daughter, she's
like a technical advisor and she she's in charge of
(19:18):
all of the cars. She told me so she knew
the scene and she said you have to hold this
too and this too if you're gonna go in there
like that. And then I was holding a hammer, Bro,
and U and a screwdriver. Bro. I was like a transmission. Bro.
You know when if I look at the gasoline and
trying to start, it look like you were trying to
(19:39):
steal it. I know. Boom, Let's go Felipe.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
As far as a raging food on Netflix, now, it's
just for a special, you know, Philpople, We love you
here man, thank you very much for your time.
Speaker 1 (19:50):
We're having me Fool. What's up everybody? Check out Raging
Fool and check out my podcast What's Up Food and
the History for Foods podcasts where you can learn about
history and laugh. That's right.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Yeah, it's it's it's it's comedy and history all in one, right.
Speaker 1 (20:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:07):
Bro.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
We talk about a lot of stuff, bro, like the
history of stand up comedy, the history of Native American
stand up comedy. We had a real estate problem and
that's the name of the book. And we had the
history of the Irish Uprising of nineteen sixteen. That's right,
that's right, that's right. The history of serial killers. I
(20:30):
love that, love that. Yeah, man, Jackie is a big
fan of that.
Speaker 2 (20:33):
Felippe Spars appreciated man, Netflix, Raging Food, Let's go What's
Up Food?
Speaker 1 (20:38):
Hey Jackie Ridge.
Speaker 2 (20:39):
For the Cruise Show.
Speaker 1 (20:40):
Thanks for listening to The Cruise Show podcast. Make sure
to subscribe and hey, auto download so you don't miss
an episode.
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