Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
He served at the Pentagon as an army jag. He
graduated from Notre Dame and has two law degrees from
Boston University and Georgetown University. He's been practicing law for
over thirty years. He's your family's personal attorney. It's time
for the David Carrier Show.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Hello, and welcome to the David Carrier Show. I'm David Carrier,
your family's personal attorney, and you have found a place
where we talk about a state planning, elder law, real
estate and business law. And occasionally, if you go back
and review the first hour, which is available on the website,
on the iHeartMedia and et cetera, et cetera, we get
(00:41):
off topic. But anyway, I thought it was well, let
me just say it was cathartic for me, so I
hope it might be useful for you. Do I know anyway?
You know I was thinking, well, cheaper than a psychiatrist.
Well probably isn't. Actually I'm more expensive to do the
show than anyway. Long story short, what we're gonna get
(01:05):
to today are the our questions, right, I mean, some
some legal technical stuff, just to prove that I still
know I haven't lost all my marvels. And uh, you know,
just just how the stuff should work and compare and contrast. Okay,
so the question here is, oh, I should tell you
go to the website Davidcarrier Law dot com. Because at
(01:28):
the website Davidcarrier law dot com is a Christmas present
for you. Yes, let's call it that a Christmas present
for you. Actually it's the Artificial Intelligence assistant that's been
on the website for several months now and it just
keeps getting better. It's amazing, you know, this this AI stuff.
I hear that it's over sold, that you know, it's
(01:49):
too much, and it's like, well, maybe you know what
I mean, maybe maybe it's not gonna live up to
the hype. I mean, what lives up to the hype?
Speaker 1 (01:59):
Right?
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Except for estate plans done by my firm, they live
up to the hype. Sure, but what else? Very few
things live up to the hype. But but even if
even if this is as far as it goes, it's
still kind of nuts that you can go to a
website and actually, you know, you click on the right
click and you can talk to it and then you
(02:21):
don't have to click anymore. You don't have to type,
you don't have to click. It works on your cell phone, right,
how amazing is that? And you can ask it, you
can ask it questions. Now, it's not one of the
big problems they have with the AI. And you should
try this. If you ever doubt it, just go to
like one of the websites there, like check GPT or
one of those guys, right, and ask for a biography
(02:44):
of yourself, Right, I've done this, or ask them to
put together your resume, and you will not recognize that person. Okay,
There'll be all kinds of stuff that it hallucinates about you,
and it just assumes that you might have done this
stuff and they'll put it on there. Not accurate, not
very good. Right, So there's a lot of as you know,
(03:07):
how I feel about these things, there's a lot of
what I would describe as total freaking nonsense or ill
advised opinions, depending on how you view it about a
state planning out there, right, stuff that's unhelpful, stuff that's
positively harmful. So our AI expert is trained on our stuff. Okay,
(03:30):
it's limited. It doesn't just go out and you know,
sweep in everything that's out there. Instead, what you get
is a very tailored based on you know, my writing
based on these shows, based on all the stuff that
I've said over the last thirty years or so, thirty
(03:51):
six years or so about this stuff. Okay, So what
you get is it's still not legal advice because because
you really do need you got to have a human being.
You gotta have somebody who actually knows this stuff to
double check what that thing's telling you, because sometimes it's right,
but sometimes it's wrong, and sometimes it doesn't ask all
it doesn't ask you questions. You have to tell it stuff,
(04:14):
and so there are layers to this stuff that you
need to ask questions. The AI doesn't do that. But
that said, it's extremely useful, so you don't have to
go click click clicking all over the website to find something.
Just ask it. It'll get and it keeps getting better
like the next thing. And I don't know if it
(04:35):
doesn't yet, but it'll like give you an appointment for
a workshop. Okay, it'll do that. We're working on something
that'll do the scheduling, so you can call in and
it'll schedule an appointment for you. Still have a human
being review it to make sure you know. We can
give you four hours for a you know for a
ten minute phone call, but it's so much, it's very useful.
(04:58):
Put it that way, and urge you to go website
Davidcarrier Law dot com. Let the thing pop up, and
then you can type questions. There are some suggested questions
you can click on and very rarely do you get
the same answer. You get the same answer twice. So anyway,
that's that's my hoo ho, Merry Christmas to you. Let's
(05:19):
get to some of these questions. How do I close
a family living trust revocable living trust? I am the
trustee and I have four siblings. I'm the trustee and
have four siblings who will also be beneficiary, so five beneficiaries.
The trust has a checking account to pay taxes and bills.
I'd like to close everything out as soon as I
pay the twenty twenty five taxes. Okay, So here's a
(05:41):
number of things that they're not telling you which have
to be true in order for this question to make
any sense. I would Now it may not make any sense.
And these assumptions that I'm making, Remember what happens when
you assume, right, Remember, but I have to make some
assumptions in order the question. So the question is how
(06:02):
do you do it? And the answer is number one,
assuming that you've done everything else. I'm guessing. I'm guessing
that mom and dad have died. They were the ones
who set up the trust, and now it's going to
the five siblings. That's a guess because they didn't say it,
but I'm guessing. I'm guessing also that they sold whatever
else there was right, and now it's time to make
(06:25):
the final distribution. Okay, so this is where this is
the mistake. It seems to me that everybody does right
because I'm guessing that this is like you know, in
my experience, ninety nine point nine nine nine percent of
trust out there, which is divide and distribute. It's like
(06:45):
get get it out to the kids as soon as possible.
And the problem with that is, out of five kids,
one of them might be going through divorce, one of
them might have co signed for the kids student loans.
One of them might have been in a car accident.
One of them might have creditors, one of them may
have failed a business, one of them might have a
spouse with dementia. There's a million things that could have happened,
(07:07):
so that getting the inheritance and then we don't even
know how much money we're talking about, so that getting
the inheritance would be a very bad thing indeed, because
the beneficiary wouldn't get it, it would go shooting over
to the creditors of the beneficiary. Okay, that happens all
the time, all right, that is not one hundred percent
(07:30):
of the time. I'm gonna say all the time. I'm
saying it's a routine kind of thing to happen that, oh, hey,
here have a pork chop. WHOA, you don't get it. Hey,
here have this wonderful thing. WHOA, you don't get it.
Hey you have this other? No, you're not getting it.
And that happens because if this is like most trust,
and again i'm assuming like most trust, it's just says
(07:52):
divide and distribute our trusts say divide, yes, and distribute
in trust, a separate trust for each kid. And so
before you close it out, you call the kid and
you say, hey, you can. I'm gonna set up these trusts.
Mom and dad provided in the document. This is our clients, right.
Mom and dad provided in the document that you can
(08:14):
get your inheritance in a trust that no one can
ever take away from you. But over which you have
entire control. Invest it however you want, use it, however
you want, do whatever you want with it, leave it
to whoever you want, okay. But because Mom and Dad
set it up, it is invulnerable, all right. It's adam ontage,
(08:35):
you know. It's like the Wolverine's clause, right, super duper califragilistic, xpialidocious,
wonderful trust for you. But if your idea is I'm
going to the casino this weekend and I just want
my Cashi money to invest right at the casino, invested
(08:57):
in the lobster dinner, at least you have something anyway,
If that's what you want to do, tell me now
and you'll sign. You know, you can sign a release
saying I just want the money because I'm going to
empty it out anyway, right, and I'll give you the money, okay.
So in my world, in between the I've paid all
the bills, I've paid the taxes, everything else. Now what
(09:19):
do I do with the rest of it? There is
the offer to do the trust that Mom and Dad
set up for them. I doubt that that's available here,
but that would be available if this is one of
our folks, right, because that's how we set them up
because why because things happen, and even small amounts of
money are very welcome when your back's to the wall.
(09:42):
But imagine your kid's back is to the wall, right,
and now they're going to get an inheritance of any amount,
but they don't get it because why because they're creditors
intervene and intercept it. Okay, that's kind of routine. All right,
that's what happened. The check hits your account, but it's garnished. Boom,
Now you lose the money. Okay, So let's let's assume
(10:04):
that that is not what's happening because they're not a
client of ours. Then what do we do next? Well,
there's a process for this, which I will talk about
when we get back from the When we get back
from the break, you're listening to the David Carrier Show.
I'm David Carrier, your family's personal attorney, inviting you to
the website Davidcarrier Law dot com. Talk to the AI expert.
(10:26):
It's better than magic a ball, I promise you.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
This hour of the David Carrier Show is pro bono,
So call in now at seven seven four twenty four.
This is the David Carrier.
Speaker 2 (10:38):
Show, Don and hit some Well, they're really dragging this out,
aren't they. Yeah, good enough, Welcome back to the David
Carrier Show. On David Carrier. Your family's personal attorney red
nosed as ever. But there you go. How do I
close a family revocable living trust. I'm the trustee and
I have four siblings. I'm the trustee of siblings who
(11:00):
are also beneficiaries. Trust has a checking account to pay
taxes and bills. I'd like to close everything out as
soon as I pay the twenty twenty five tax as well.
We're gonna assume that you sold the house, that the
checking account has the proceeds in it. Right, We're gonna
assume a bunch of stuff. We're also gonna assume that
you didn't protect mom and dad, didn't protect the siblings
(11:20):
from their own life circumstances. That's what we talked about
last segment. We're gonna assume that. And now it's time
you get the checks. Ready. Everybody just wants their doray me,
they want their MAPO. Okay, fine, here you go, but
but do not this is my advice. Do not just
(11:41):
give them them check, right, don't just mail them a
check and don't just give them, make them sign a
receipt when they get the check. Now, what we always
what I always do, what I always do is number one.
It sounds like things have been moving along. But again
I don't have a lot of this email. I'll read
you the whole thing. So let's assume that we don't
(12:04):
have a tax clearance certificate because they want to pay
the taxes. Well, you better reserve something in case you
got the taxes wrong. That's my first advice to you.
So withhold something, reserve something for any potential tax liability.
Any And you say, well, why would I do that?
I don't think of going yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.
But talk to your attorney, talk to your accountant, talk
(12:27):
about putting in for a tax clearance certificate, you know,
so that they're not going to audit you. Everything's everything's
a okay, all right, That's what I would advise there. Now,
here's the thing. When you distribute anything to a beneficiary,
you never give but you get. Now, you can't you
cannot condition distribution on them signing what I'm doing, what
(12:52):
I'm about to say. You can't say, well, you're not
going to get anything unless you sign off. Okay, you
can't do it like that. But what you can do
as you can say, you know, here's a statement of
facts that we call it the receipt and Release, okay.
And the idea is, I don't want you, as the trustee,
(13:13):
right to worry that within the next two years, five years,
for contract, whatever, somebody's going to come back and say,
you did this, you did that, You didn't tell me this,
you didn't tell me that. Okay. I don't want that
to happen. And if you hand over a check, you
have no reason to think that won't happen, because it
does happen. It does happen. You don wanted that to happen.
(13:36):
So what we do is we put together a document.
We call it the receipt and Release. And the receipt
and Release is first of all, a statement of facts.
You know, Jane and John were Mom and dad. You know,
Uey Dewey and Louis are the kids. Mom. Dad died
on this day. Dad died on that day. They had
(13:57):
a trust. I'm the trustee of the trust. And so
you set out the facts, right, and then you attach
to this thing, you know, and your references in the
statement of facts. Attached is an inventory of all assets
in the trust, whatever they are and their values. Do
an inventory. And then you say, and attached is also
an accounting, and you put the accounting. You attach that
(14:20):
not in this thing, but you attach it. Exhibit A
is the inventory, Exhibit B is the is the accounting, okay,
And then underneath it, right underneath that, you say, my
share of the inheritance's x amount of dollars. You know,
I understand there's a reserve for you know, potential liabilities
(14:40):
that will be dispersed at the trustees discretion. Rightuse you
don't want to set yourself up for a Oh you
said you give it out in six months. Yeah, but
this got delayed and that got delayed, and now now
you're in trouble. No, at trustees discretion. Right then, may
be an additional distribution, but this much was reserved for taxes.
(15:01):
And then then in the body of this thing you
have them say things like I accept the inventory as
a full incomplete statement, I accept the accounting as a
full incomplete statement. I release you know, whoever it is.
I release my brother or sister the trustee from liability
in this life and the next. So what you do
(15:23):
in this document is you layer on you know, I
agree that this is correct. You know, I adopt the
statement of facts, and any court can only rely on
the statement of facts. I adopt the inventory, I adopt
the other thing. Blah blah, blah blah blah. So all
that stuff, right, and then you say it about six
different ways. Okay, this is what I do. Anyway, we
(15:47):
say it about six different ways because sometimes people come
back and say, oh, I don't agree to this part.
I said, okay, we'll line it out because you said
it five other ways. You know, you said the same
thing five other ways. Already, you can take out five
out of the six and we'll we'll still be fine.
We will still have protected the trustee. The point is
(16:08):
there's two points to doing this. Number One, if you
have taken up the burden of being the trustee, you
are a fine and wonderful person. That's what I think. Okay,
you're put yourself out there for the family. You're doing
the Lord's work, right, You're doing the good thing, and
(16:28):
all you get for it is a bunch of where's
my money and ingratitude. I mean that's frequent, if not typical. Okay,
but you're doing it, you're good hearted, you're a wonderful person.
You shouldn't get sued for it too, because you're idiot.
Brother or sisters in law or whatever said that you
(16:49):
did something wrong. Okay, I mean no, I don't want that.
So that's number one. I don't want there to be
legal liability. So you give them this thing in advance.
In advance, you send this out right, and in it
says things like, go ask a lawyer what the hell
this means? Don't count on anything that I said, blah
blah blah. So go out and have a lawyer do it.
Take your time. I'm fine with it, okay, and then
(17:13):
sign and notarize and give it back. And when I
get them all back in then I'll cut everybody. I'll
mail out the checks which are ready to go. Okay,
Now what if they don't do that, whether they say
screw you, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna sign off
on that. And you say, well, why aren't you going
to sign off on it? Is there any part here? No,
I don't. I don't disagree with any of it, but
I'm not signing off on it. Fine, then we go
(17:34):
to probate court. For a protective order that says, you know,
and it's put up or shut up time, you see,
because now it's gonna cut you more money because I
got to go to probate court, right, But I want
that trustee protected. I don't want the trustee to have
a sleepless night or a worry in the world that
anyone's going to come back on them. And if everybody
(17:56):
signs off, now I'm feeling good about it. I'm feeling calm, peaceful,
plump my pillow, put a mint on it. Wonderful. Instantly
they don't do anymore. But okay, so that's the good thing.
That's the good thing if they sign off on it.
If they don't sign off on it, I'm going to
probate court because if there's some suspicion that you have
(18:16):
that something was wrong, all right, and I've got it.
I've already done the work. I just asked for a
protective order to affirm the inventory in the accounting. Then
then I send out notices to everybody. It's put up
for shut up time. Either either the court approves the
inventory in the accounting or they don't. But now's your
time to object. You don't get to come back later on. Okay,
(18:38):
So am I defensive about it? Yes? I am. But
I want there to be a silent night, a holy night,
where everybody gets their distributions and everybody's happy. Or tell
me now give it to me, now, give it to
me straight. There you go. That's the answer to this one.
We'll get to some more when we get back from
the news. You're listening to the David Carrier Show. I'm
(19:02):
David Carrier, your family's personal attorney or men or whatever. Anyway,
it kind of bollocks things up, and so now anybody
can own it and there's no entitlement with the spousal thing.
On real estate or other property, you can own property
in your own name and it's your property. But here's
the deal. If it goes through probate. If it goes
(19:25):
through probate, there are allowances, right and your spouse can
elect against the will. There are allowances that your spouse
is entitled to. However, if you do a trust to
a trust, the trust doesn't become part of the probated state,
and it will go where you want it to go. Now,
(19:46):
I can understand leaving it to your dad, but I'm
guessing that there's somebody that you actually want to leave
it to. You don't want to just spite the spouse,
do you? I mean, you don't want to give it
to me instead of the spouse. Right, I'm guessing there's
there's there must be more going on here. Again, it's
just a little short email, So how the heck do
(20:06):
I know? But the good news is that by doing
a trust, because they marry you, they don't marry your trust, right,
you can you can, certainly, you can certainly do that.
You can you can just leave it to whoever you
want to leave it to. I mean, that's the thing.
(20:27):
You ded it into the trust. Now it's not part
of the probata state. Now your spouse can elect against
it against the will, and they can't take their allowances
out of out of that property. So you want to
do a trust, that's how you're going to do it.
You can leave it to whoever you want to leave
it to. You can even let your spouse live there
for a while and then give it to somebody else
(20:48):
if that's what you're that's what your intention is. But
I'm I'm a little off my game here because I'm
drinking hot water instead of coffee, and it's it's really terrible. Sorry,
I don't advise it. How do you determine who is
the executor of one's estate? Well, that's a good question, right,
and we say personal representative, you know, just to you
(21:09):
don't conjure up images of guys with a big acts
and a black hood over their head. Right, my partner
passed away. See this always this always gets this is
always worrisome. Whenever whenever people say partner, Now is it
civil partner? Is there a civil union where you're married.
When people say partner, I hear no legal relationship. That's
(21:32):
what I hear. Now, maybe they're partners in the law firm.
How do I know? Doesn't say, but my partner passed away.
He created an advanced directive, but it can't be found. Well,
it's irrelevant anyway, he's dead, right, advanced directive is about healthcare.
Not much to do with healthcare when you're dead. I
don't think I was the medical power of attorney, which
(21:52):
is the advanced directive. Okay, good for you. Who becomes
executor of his estate, Well, whoever's named in the will
or the or the trust need successor trustee. Let's use
executor in sort of a broad thing. Also, he had
retirement money. He named two beneficiaries, but that documentation is
missing as well. Oh this is wonderful. What the house
(22:15):
burnt down or something. Anyway, if he named the beneficiaries,
then that's and he sent the paperwork in, right, then
that's going to control. Generally speaking, it's whatever paperwork they
received before you died. Okay. So we have had situations
where we have had situations where it went to the
(22:37):
wrong quote unquote wrong beneficiaries because the paperwork they mailed it,
but it didn't clear right. Same way with the insurance,
so you know, we changed beneficiaries on that. The only
way to determine this at this point is to pitch
the whole thing into probate and let's have a let's
have a fight, you know, let's let's make the lawyers
rich on this one. What do you say, Because that's
(23:00):
what's gonna happen, right, I mean, it's gonna you're gonna
duke it out and as many people as might have
a claim, which would be you know, kind of the
way it works is in intestacy, it goes to the spouse,
then the kids, then the parents, then the siblings, then
the nieces and nephews. Okay, and if there is nobody
(23:22):
after you've done all that, then you go back up
a generation you start looking again. Okay. So there's potential
many claimants, many people who might want to do this.
So another good reason to plan ahead. Let's see what's another.
(23:42):
All right, is it smart to appoint someone who lives
out of state as the trustee? All my assets are
in Michigan. I'm setting up a trust for my kids benefit.
One lives in California, one does not. I was told
it is not allowed, not allowed to appoint the out
of state child trustee. Well that's a bunch of bullshit.
Excuse my I meant bs. That is certainly not true.
(24:08):
You can appoint whoever you want. I mean, we've got
we've got trustees and you know, well probably not anymore.
But where the heck with Fiji? Fiji? For the longest
time we had a we had a trust was being
run out of Fiji. It's no big deal. Here's here's
the thing. When you're when you're trying to choose your fiduciaries, Okay,
when it comes to money to money, property, et cetera,
(24:31):
it is very unusual that there be a you know, uh,
got to do it in the next ten minutes. Okay,
that's kind of that's kind of unusual, right. I mean,
you can work things out, you can go to probate,
(24:52):
you can get somebody appointed, et cetera, et cetera. Because
money is like you know, property is like it's going
to be there, right, So it's unusual that seconds count
when it comes to the money. So you might as
well have somebody in Fiji if you if you trust them,
if they have the good judgment that you want. Okay,
(25:12):
so go ahead. I mean, pick anybody you want out
of state whatever, for your trustee, for your financial power
of attorney, your agent, under the financial power of attorney. Right,
go ahead, that's perfectly aoka. But healthcare is different. So
if let's say you've got two kids and they're equal, right,
(25:37):
they're equal as far as financial acumen, well, flip a coin.
Ones in state, one's out of state, flip a coin.
It doesn't really matter. Okay, you might want the one
local just because they can lock up the house whatever.
But we've got people traveling in from out of state
who do that just fine. But when it comes to medical,
medical that's different because with medical you want somebody to
(26:02):
be Johnny on the Spot. You want somebody who's living.
If possible. It's not always possible, but if it is possible,
and you got two kids and you're yeah, yeah, the
one be okay, go with the local one. That's the
one time. And when it comes to medical stuff, when
seconds count, hours away, when seconds matter, we're hours away, right,
(26:25):
you don't want that. So with the medical stuff, you
do want somebody who's right there, Johnny on the Spot,
Jane on the Spot, what have you. But go ahead,
go ahead. And with the healthcare, you want the local person.
With finances, it doesn't matter, simple as that. You've been
(26:47):
listening to the David Carrier Show. I'm David Carrier, your
family's personal attorney.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
David's perking and working and taking your calls. Now this
is the David Carrier Show.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
Welcome back to the David Carrier Show. I'm David Carrier,
your family's personal attorney. This is a good I mean,
it's the last segment, so you can call in if
you want, but we're not going to get to you. Sorry,
it's trying to be that's a lump and lump of coal.
In your stocking there if you delayed this long and
see I can't even speak. I'm drinking this hot water
(27:21):
and it's not coffee. I'll tell you that much. Anyway,
Can I be held responsible for ex husband's bill from
nursing home? What ex husband needs nursing home care? He
has severe dementia. They want me to be listed as
a responsible party, and probably what it says is financially
(27:43):
responsible party. That's the whole thing. I know someone needs
to pay his money for care, but if his care
is over his monthly checks, will I be expected to
pay his bills with my money? The answer is no,
you won't. Now when you're going through the when you're
(28:04):
going through the sign in package or right or whatever
it is they want you, they want you to sign
you know, I gotta say, I'm not really sure how
the hell they're doing this, because unless you have power
of attorney for him, unless he named you in a
power of attorney as his agent, I'm not really sure
(28:26):
what authority you have to do this. I mean, again,
that's the problem with these little short emails, because you
could ask a few questions to really clarify things. So
what I'm guessing when I'm it's an ex husband, so
there's no relationship anymore. Okay, And just because you're married
to somebody doesn't automatically make you the person who gets
to manage your finances, sign him in and out of
(28:47):
long term care and stuff. That's a little bit curious there.
But anyway, basically, when you sign somebody in, if you
have their uh, you're their attorney in factor you're signing,
you are not personally responsible, you're not personally liable. Okay,
So whenever you're signing anything like this, and I'd be
(29:10):
really leery of it if you don't have power of
attorney or guardianship right or conservativeship whatever, depending on how
what he's got, or if you're not the See here's
the thing. With Social Security, powers of attorney and guardianship
doesn't work, or conservativeship doesn't work. You have to be
the financial you have to be the designated representative PAE.
(29:34):
With VA, you have to be the fiducial. There's a
whole system with the VA. There's another system with Social
Security which is parallel to but different from the system.
We have the informal power of attorney system or the
more formal probate system. So really, depending on who you're
talking about, there are like four different systems of authority,
(29:56):
all right. There is the typical power of attorney for finances,
which strongly encourage. Then there is the typical I went
to probate court and I've got guardianship conservatorship. There's that one.
Then for social security you have representative PAYE, which is
the Social securities parallel system. And then you've got another
(30:18):
system if it's a VET, and you've got the VA
fiduciary system, and they're all they're all different. You know,
you can avoid probate with the power of attorney, yes
you can't, or trust whatever, Yes you can, but that
doesn't help you with the VA or with social security anyway.
Long story short, don't sign anything you haven't read. If
(30:40):
they give you a bunch of papers, don't just sign it.
And after you sign it, you should put a comma
comma POA. It's short for power of attorney. Okay, you
could also put agent. You could also put there's other
things you could put. But if you put POA, everybody understands.
And if you're really concerned about it, you know, if
(31:01):
you think they're pulling a fast one or if they
can't describe what it is they're doing in ways that
convince you that they know what they're talking about. Because
there are lots of times people have you signed down.
They don't know any more than you do about what's
in those documents. Right, So if you're concerned about that,
before you sign your name, write the words not personally liable, right, okay,
(31:26):
not personally liable, or no personal liability or assuming no
personal liability, something like that, before you sign off representative only.
I mean, there are a bunch of different ways you
can say it, but don't just sign your name. Just
sign your name, okay. Now, if underneath in the signature
(31:47):
block of it says attorney in fact for husband or
ex husband, okay, you can sign that.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
Right.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
You don't have to put the POA. But you know,
when it comes to when it comes to this stuff,
I'm very much a a uh with the Belton suspenders,
you know what I mean? If I can do it, see,
because here's the here's the thing, then this is this
is basic, basic, The basic philosophical approach to all of
(32:17):
this is is you don't get a second chance at this. Okay,
if you're if you're doing if you're agreeing to be
fiduciary for somebody, If you're signing a legal document for somebody, right,
it may be that you're signing yourself up for, you know,
(32:39):
the first circle of hell. Okay, it will be the
first circle of hell. I mean it'd be the first one.
It's not terrible, maybe just purgatory, I don't know, but
it's not the You didn't sign up for the seventh circle. Okay.
You didn't sign up to be part next to the
great Satan. You didn't. No, no, no, I'm just skimming
the edge. I'm just visiting. Right, I'll get see what
(33:03):
I'm saying. Right, So, if you agree to do any
of this stuff, understand that you're taking on a burden. Now,
typically it's a burden of love, it's a burden of care, responsibility.
It's wonderful, it's a wonderful thing to do, right, but
it won't be fun, Okay, and it can explode like
a like a you know those old movies with the
(33:26):
cigars flodes in somebody's face. Right, it can be like that. Okay,
that you were doing the righteous thing, you're doing the
family thing, you're doing the the good thing. All good intentions,
and it turns out that you're you know, terrible. That happens,
but it doesn't always happen, and it doesn't have to
happen if we're very careful about what we're doing. Don't
(33:50):
put your foot in the bear trap, because guess what,
most of the times you can figure out if there's
a bear trap there. Okay, you can. You know, this
stuff can be done in such a way. The documents
can be written in such a way. You can approach
your responsibility in a way that honors the relationship that
you have with this person who named you. Okay, you
(34:11):
can do the good things. You can eat, you know,
and it's good people like you that make the world
go around. The generosity of spirit, it's the willingness to
take like this lady's you know, to her ex husband
and she's still helping out. What a wonderful thing, what
a wonderful, wonderful, generous thing for her to do, all right,
for this guy and apparently it didn't work out for him. Okay, fine,
(34:34):
but she's still willing, you know, to step up. She
just doesn't want to put her foot in the in
the mousetrap, in the bear trap. Okay, she doesn't want that.
Totally understandable. So don't just go into these things, you know,
was it galahad? You know my strength is that of
ten because my heart is pure. Right, well, your heart
(34:55):
may be pure, but it's an impure world, okay, And
you can go into it with all good intentions, right,
which is typically how these the most simple, the worst
cases are you go into it with good intentions, you're
being a good person, and you get trapped. So just
be careful about what you do. So it's a great question.
(35:17):
Put poa after it, put you know, as representative something
like that, because there's no way that you're going to
be personally liable unless you agree to be personally liable.
Just make sure you're not signing some paper that says
personal guarantee or something. Being the financially responsible party means
that you're helping out using his money for him, not
(35:38):
your own money. Just be careful. There, you've been listening
to the David Carrier Show on David Carrier your family's
personal attorney inviting you to the website Davidcarrier law dot com.
Get your further questions. I'll get some guidance on them anyway,
not actually.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
Answers you've been listening to the David Carrier Show, a
lively discussion addressing your questions and concerns, but not legal advice.
(36:13):
There is a big difference, so when making decisions that
affect your family, your property, or yourself, the best advice
is to seek good advice specific to your unique needs.
If you missed any of today's show, or would like
additional information about the law offices of David Carrier, please
visit Davidcarrier Law dot com.
He served at the Pentagon as an army jag. He
graduated from Notre Dame and has two law degrees from
Boston University and Georgetown University. He's been practicing law for
over thirty years. He's your family's personal attorney. It's time
for the David Carrier Show.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Hello, and welcome to the David Carrier Show. I'm David Carrier,
your family's personal attorney, and you have found a place
where we talk about a state planning, elder law, real
estate and business law. And occasionally, if you go back
and review the first hour, which is available on the website,
on the iHeartMedia and et cetera, et cetera, we get
(00:41):
off topic. But anyway, I thought it was well, let
me just say it was cathartic for me, so I
hope it might be useful for you. Do I know anyway?
You know I was thinking, well, cheaper than a psychiatrist.
Well probably isn't. Actually I'm more expensive to do the
show than anyway. Long story short, what we're gonna get
(01:05):
to today are the our questions, right, I mean, some
some legal technical stuff, just to prove that I still
know I haven't lost all my marvels. And uh, you know,
just just how the stuff should work and compare and contrast. Okay,
so the question here is, oh, I should tell you
go to the website Davidcarrier Law dot com. Because at
(01:28):
the website Davidcarrier law dot com is a Christmas present
for you. Yes, let's call it that a Christmas present
for you. Actually it's the Artificial Intelligence assistant that's been
on the website for several months now and it just
keeps getting better. It's amazing, you know, this this AI stuff.
I hear that it's over sold, that you know, it's
(01:49):
too much, and it's like, well, maybe you know what
I mean, maybe maybe it's not gonna live up to
the hype. I mean, what lives up to the hype?
Speaker 1 (01:59):
Right?
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Except for estate plans done by my firm, they live
up to the hype. Sure, but what else? Very few
things live up to the hype. But but even if
even if this is as far as it goes, it's
still kind of nuts that you can go to a
website and actually, you know, you click on the right
click and you can talk to it and then you
(02:21):
don't have to click anymore. You don't have to type,
you don't have to click. It works on your cell phone, right,
how amazing is that? And you can ask it, you
can ask it questions. Now, it's not one of the
big problems they have with the AI. And you should
try this. If you ever doubt it, just go to
like one of the websites there, like check GPT or
one of those guys, right, and ask for a biography
(02:44):
of yourself, Right, I've done this, or ask them to
put together your resume, and you will not recognize that person. Okay,
There'll be all kinds of stuff that it hallucinates about you,
and it just assumes that you might have done this
stuff and they'll put it on there. Not accurate, not
very good. Right, So there's a lot of as you know,
(03:07):
how I feel about these things, there's a lot of
what I would describe as total freaking nonsense or ill
advised opinions, depending on how you view it about a
state planning out there, right, stuff that's unhelpful, stuff that's
positively harmful. So our AI expert is trained on our stuff. Okay,
(03:30):
it's limited. It doesn't just go out and you know,
sweep in everything that's out there. Instead, what you get
is a very tailored based on you know, my writing
based on these shows, based on all the stuff that
I've said over the last thirty years or so, thirty
(03:51):
six years or so about this stuff. Okay, So what
you get is it's still not legal advice because because
you really do need you got to have a human being.
You gotta have somebody who actually knows this stuff to
double check what that thing's telling you, because sometimes it's right,
but sometimes it's wrong, and sometimes it doesn't ask all
it doesn't ask you questions. You have to tell it stuff,
(04:14):
and so there are layers to this stuff that you
need to ask questions. The AI doesn't do that. But
that said, it's extremely useful, so you don't have to
go click click clicking all over the website to find something.
Just ask it. It'll get and it keeps getting better
like the next thing. And I don't know if it
(04:35):
doesn't yet, but it'll like give you an appointment for
a workshop. Okay, it'll do that. We're working on something
that'll do the scheduling, so you can call in and
it'll schedule an appointment for you. Still have a human
being review it to make sure you know. We can
give you four hours for a you know for a
ten minute phone call, but it's so much, it's very useful.
(04:58):
Put it that way, and urge you to go website
Davidcarrier Law dot com. Let the thing pop up, and
then you can type questions. There are some suggested questions
you can click on and very rarely do you get
the same answer. You get the same answer twice. So anyway,
that's that's my hoo ho, Merry Christmas to you. Let's
(05:19):
get to some of these questions. How do I close
a family living trust revocable living trust? I am the
trustee and I have four siblings. I'm the trustee and
have four siblings who will also be beneficiary, so five beneficiaries.
The trust has a checking account to pay taxes and bills.
I'd like to close everything out as soon as I
pay the twenty twenty five taxes. Okay, So here's a
(05:41):
number of things that they're not telling you which have
to be true in order for this question to make
any sense. I would Now it may not make any sense.
And these assumptions that I'm making, Remember what happens when
you assume, right, Remember, but I have to make some
assumptions in order the question. So the question is how
(06:02):
do you do it? And the answer is number one,
assuming that you've done everything else. I'm guessing. I'm guessing
that mom and dad have died. They were the ones
who set up the trust, and now it's going to
the five siblings. That's a guess because they didn't say it,
but I'm guessing. I'm guessing also that they sold whatever
else there was right, and now it's time to make
(06:25):
the final distribution. Okay, so this is where this is
the mistake. It seems to me that everybody does right
because I'm guessing that this is like you know, in
my experience, ninety nine point nine nine nine percent of
trust out there, which is divide and distribute. It's like
(06:45):
get get it out to the kids as soon as possible.
And the problem with that is, out of five kids,
one of them might be going through divorce, one of
them might have co signed for the kids student loans.
One of them might have been in a car accident.
One of them might have creditors, one of them may
have failed a business, one of them might have a
spouse with dementia. There's a million things that could have happened,
(07:07):
so that getting the inheritance and then we don't even
know how much money we're talking about, so that getting
the inheritance would be a very bad thing indeed, because
the beneficiary wouldn't get it, it would go shooting over
to the creditors of the beneficiary. Okay, that happens all
the time, all right, that is not one hundred percent
(07:30):
of the time. I'm gonna say all the time. I'm
saying it's a routine kind of thing to happen that, oh, hey,
here have a pork chop. WHOA, you don't get it. Hey,
here have this wonderful thing. WHOA, you don't get it.
Hey you have this other? No, you're not getting it.
And that happens because if this is like most trust,
and again i'm assuming like most trust, it's just says
(07:52):
divide and distribute our trusts say divide, yes, and distribute
in trust, a separate trust for each kid. And so
before you close it out, you call the kid and
you say, hey, you can. I'm gonna set up these trusts.
Mom and dad provided in the document. This is our clients, right.
Mom and dad provided in the document that you can
(08:14):
get your inheritance in a trust that no one can
ever take away from you. But over which you have
entire control. Invest it however you want, use it, however
you want, do whatever you want with it, leave it
to whoever you want, okay. But because Mom and Dad
set it up, it is invulnerable, all right. It's adam ontage,
(08:35):
you know. It's like the Wolverine's clause, right, super duper califragilistic, xpialidocious,
wonderful trust for you. But if your idea is I'm
going to the casino this weekend and I just want
my Cashi money to invest right at the casino, invested
(08:57):
in the lobster dinner, at least you have something anyway,
If that's what you want to do, tell me now
and you'll sign. You know, you can sign a release
saying I just want the money because I'm going to
empty it out anyway, right, and I'll give you the money, okay.
So in my world, in between the I've paid all
the bills, I've paid the taxes, everything else. Now what
(09:19):
do I do with the rest of it? There is
the offer to do the trust that Mom and Dad
set up for them. I doubt that that's available here,
but that would be available if this is one of
our folks, right, because that's how we set them up
because why because things happen, and even small amounts of
money are very welcome when your back's to the wall.
(09:42):
But imagine your kid's back is to the wall, right,
and now they're going to get an inheritance of any amount,
but they don't get it because why because they're creditors
intervene and intercept it. Okay, that's kind of routine. All right,
that's what happened. The check hits your account, but it's garnished. Boom,
Now you lose the money. Okay, So let's let's assume
(10:04):
that that is not what's happening because they're not a
client of ours. Then what do we do next? Well,
there's a process for this, which I will talk about
when we get back from the When we get back
from the break, you're listening to the David Carrier Show.
I'm David Carrier, your family's personal attorney, inviting you to
the website Davidcarrier Law dot com. Talk to the AI expert.
(10:26):
It's better than magic a ball, I promise you.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
This hour of the David Carrier Show is pro bono,
So call in now at seven seven four twenty four.
This is the David Carrier.
Speaker 2 (10:38):
Show, Don and hit some Well, they're really dragging this out,
aren't they. Yeah, good enough, Welcome back to the David
Carrier Show. On David Carrier. Your family's personal attorney red
nosed as ever. But there you go. How do I
close a family revocable living trust. I'm the trustee and
I have four siblings. I'm the trustee of siblings who
(11:00):
are also beneficiaries. Trust has a checking account to pay
taxes and bills. I'd like to close everything out as
soon as I pay the twenty twenty five tax as well.
We're gonna assume that you sold the house, that the
checking account has the proceeds in it. Right, We're gonna
assume a bunch of stuff. We're also gonna assume that
you didn't protect mom and dad, didn't protect the siblings
(11:20):
from their own life circumstances. That's what we talked about
last segment. We're gonna assume that. And now it's time
you get the checks. Ready. Everybody just wants their doray me,
they want their MAPO. Okay, fine, here you go, but
but do not this is my advice. Do not just
(11:41):
give them them check, right, don't just mail them a
check and don't just give them, make them sign a
receipt when they get the check. Now, what we always
what I always do, what I always do is number one.
It sounds like things have been moving along. But again
I don't have a lot of this email. I'll read
you the whole thing. So let's assume that we don't
(12:04):
have a tax clearance certificate because they want to pay
the taxes. Well, you better reserve something in case you
got the taxes wrong. That's my first advice to you.
So withhold something, reserve something for any potential tax liability.
Any And you say, well, why would I do that?
I don't think of going yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.
But talk to your attorney, talk to your accountant, talk
(12:27):
about putting in for a tax clearance certificate, you know,
so that they're not going to audit you. Everything's everything's
a okay, all right, That's what I would advise there. Now,
here's the thing. When you distribute anything to a beneficiary,
you never give but you get. Now, you can't you
cannot condition distribution on them signing what I'm doing, what
(12:52):
I'm about to say. You can't say, well, you're not
going to get anything unless you sign off. Okay, you
can't do it like that. But what you can do
as you can say, you know, here's a statement of
facts that we call it the receipt and Release, okay.
And the idea is, I don't want you, as the trustee,
(13:13):
right to worry that within the next two years, five years,
for contract, whatever, somebody's going to come back and say,
you did this, you did that, You didn't tell me this,
you didn't tell me that. Okay. I don't want that
to happen. And if you hand over a check, you
have no reason to think that won't happen, because it
does happen. It does happen. You don wanted that to happen.
(13:36):
So what we do is we put together a document.
We call it the receipt and Release. And the receipt
and Release is first of all, a statement of facts.
You know, Jane and John were Mom and dad. You know,
Uey Dewey and Louis are the kids. Mom. Dad died
on this day. Dad died on that day. They had
(13:57):
a trust. I'm the trustee of the trust. And so
you set out the facts, right, and then you attach
to this thing, you know, and your references in the
statement of facts. Attached is an inventory of all assets
in the trust, whatever they are and their values. Do
an inventory. And then you say, and attached is also
an accounting, and you put the accounting. You attach that
(14:20):
not in this thing, but you attach it. Exhibit A
is the inventory, Exhibit B is the is the accounting, okay,
And then underneath it, right underneath that, you say, my
share of the inheritance's x amount of dollars. You know,
I understand there's a reserve for you know, potential liabilities
(14:40):
that will be dispersed at the trustees discretion. Rightuse you
don't want to set yourself up for a Oh you
said you give it out in six months. Yeah, but
this got delayed and that got delayed, and now now
you're in trouble. No, at trustees discretion. Right then, may
be an additional distribution, but this much was reserved for taxes.
(15:01):
And then then in the body of this thing you
have them say things like I accept the inventory as
a full incomplete statement, I accept the accounting as a
full incomplete statement. I release you know, whoever it is.
I release my brother or sister the trustee from liability
in this life and the next. So what you do
(15:23):
in this document is you layer on you know, I
agree that this is correct. You know, I adopt the
statement of facts, and any court can only rely on
the statement of facts. I adopt the inventory, I adopt
the other thing. Blah blah, blah blah blah. So all
that stuff, right, and then you say it about six
different ways. Okay, this is what I do. Anyway, we
(15:47):
say it about six different ways because sometimes people come
back and say, oh, I don't agree to this part.
I said, okay, we'll line it out because you said
it five other ways. You know, you said the same
thing five other ways. Already, you can take out five
out of the six and we'll we'll still be fine.
We will still have protected the trustee. The point is
(16:08):
there's two points to doing this. Number One, if you
have taken up the burden of being the trustee, you
are a fine and wonderful person. That's what I think. Okay,
you're put yourself out there for the family. You're doing
the Lord's work, right, You're doing the good thing, and
(16:28):
all you get for it is a bunch of where's
my money and ingratitude. I mean that's frequent, if not typical. Okay,
but you're doing it, you're good hearted, you're a wonderful person.
You shouldn't get sued for it too, because you're idiot.
Brother or sisters in law or whatever said that you
(16:49):
did something wrong. Okay, I mean no, I don't want that.
So that's number one. I don't want there to be
legal liability. So you give them this thing in advance.
In advance, you send this out right, and in it
says things like, go ask a lawyer what the hell
this means? Don't count on anything that I said, blah
blah blah. So go out and have a lawyer do it.
Take your time. I'm fine with it, okay, and then
(17:13):
sign and notarize and give it back. And when I
get them all back in then I'll cut everybody. I'll
mail out the checks which are ready to go. Okay,
Now what if they don't do that, whether they say
screw you, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna sign off
on that. And you say, well, why aren't you going
to sign off on it? Is there any part here? No,
I don't. I don't disagree with any of it, but
I'm not signing off on it. Fine, then we go
(17:34):
to probate court. For a protective order that says, you know,
and it's put up or shut up time, you see,
because now it's gonna cut you more money because I
got to go to probate court, right, But I want
that trustee protected. I don't want the trustee to have
a sleepless night or a worry in the world that
anyone's going to come back on them. And if everybody
(17:56):
signs off, now I'm feeling good about it. I'm feeling calm, peaceful,
plump my pillow, put a mint on it. Wonderful. Instantly
they don't do anymore. But okay, so that's the good thing.
That's the good thing if they sign off on it.
If they don't sign off on it, I'm going to
probate court because if there's some suspicion that you have
(18:16):
that something was wrong, all right, and I've got it.
I've already done the work. I just asked for a
protective order to affirm the inventory in the accounting. Then
then I send out notices to everybody. It's put up
for shut up time. Either either the court approves the
inventory in the accounting or they don't. But now's your
time to object. You don't get to come back later on. Okay,
(18:38):
So am I defensive about it? Yes? I am. But
I want there to be a silent night, a holy night,
where everybody gets their distributions and everybody's happy. Or tell
me now give it to me, now, give it to
me straight. There you go. That's the answer to this one.
We'll get to some more when we get back from
the news. You're listening to the David Carrier Show. I'm
(19:02):
David Carrier, your family's personal attorney or men or whatever. Anyway,
it kind of bollocks things up, and so now anybody
can own it and there's no entitlement with the spousal thing.
On real estate or other property, you can own property
in your own name and it's your property. But here's
the deal. If it goes through probate. If it goes
(19:25):
through probate, there are allowances, right and your spouse can
elect against the will. There are allowances that your spouse
is entitled to. However, if you do a trust to
a trust, the trust doesn't become part of the probated state,
and it will go where you want it to go. Now,
(19:46):
I can understand leaving it to your dad, but I'm
guessing that there's somebody that you actually want to leave
it to. You don't want to just spite the spouse,
do you? I mean, you don't want to give it
to me instead of the spouse. Right, I'm guessing there's
there's there must be more going on here. Again, it's
just a little short email, So how the heck do
(20:06):
I know? But the good news is that by doing
a trust, because they marry you, they don't marry your trust, right,
you can you can, certainly, you can certainly do that.
You can you can just leave it to whoever you
want to leave it to. I mean, that's the thing.
(20:27):
You ded it into the trust. Now it's not part
of the probata state. Now your spouse can elect against
it against the will, and they can't take their allowances
out of out of that property. So you want to
do a trust, that's how you're going to do it.
You can leave it to whoever you want to leave
it to. You can even let your spouse live there
for a while and then give it to somebody else
(20:48):
if that's what you're that's what your intention is. But
I'm I'm a little off my game here because I'm
drinking hot water instead of coffee, and it's it's really terrible. Sorry,
I don't advise it. How do you determine who is
the executor of one's estate? Well, that's a good question, right,
and we say personal representative, you know, just to you
(21:09):
don't conjure up images of guys with a big acts
and a black hood over their head. Right, my partner
passed away. See this always this always gets this is
always worrisome. Whenever whenever people say partner, Now is it
civil partner? Is there a civil union where you're married.
When people say partner, I hear no legal relationship. That's
(21:32):
what I hear. Now, maybe they're partners in the law firm.
How do I know? Doesn't say, but my partner passed away.
He created an advanced directive, but it can't be found. Well,
it's irrelevant anyway, he's dead, right, advanced directive is about healthcare.
Not much to do with healthcare when you're dead. I
don't think I was the medical power of attorney, which
(21:52):
is the advanced directive. Okay, good for you. Who becomes
executor of his estate, Well, whoever's named in the will
or the or the trust need successor trustee. Let's use
executor in sort of a broad thing. Also, he had
retirement money. He named two beneficiaries, but that documentation is
missing as well. Oh this is wonderful. What the house
(22:15):
burnt down or something. Anyway, if he named the beneficiaries,
then that's and he sent the paperwork in, right, then
that's going to control. Generally speaking, it's whatever paperwork they
received before you died. Okay. So we have had situations
where we have had situations where it went to the
(22:37):
wrong quote unquote wrong beneficiaries because the paperwork they mailed it,
but it didn't clear right. Same way with the insurance,
so you know, we changed beneficiaries on that. The only
way to determine this at this point is to pitch
the whole thing into probate and let's have a let's
have a fight, you know, let's let's make the lawyers
rich on this one. What do you say, Because that's
(23:00):
what's gonna happen, right, I mean, it's gonna you're gonna
duke it out and as many people as might have
a claim, which would be you know, kind of the
way it works is in intestacy, it goes to the spouse,
then the kids, then the parents, then the siblings, then
the nieces and nephews. Okay, and if there is nobody
(23:22):
after you've done all that, then you go back up
a generation you start looking again. Okay. So there's potential
many claimants, many people who might want to do this.
So another good reason to plan ahead. Let's see what's another.
(23:42):
All right, is it smart to appoint someone who lives
out of state as the trustee? All my assets are
in Michigan. I'm setting up a trust for my kids benefit.
One lives in California, one does not. I was told
it is not allowed, not allowed to appoint the out
of state child trustee. Well that's a bunch of bullshit.
Excuse my I meant bs. That is certainly not true.
(24:08):
You can appoint whoever you want. I mean, we've got
we've got trustees and you know, well probably not anymore.
But where the heck with Fiji? Fiji? For the longest
time we had a we had a trust was being
run out of Fiji. It's no big deal. Here's here's
the thing. When you're when you're trying to choose your fiduciaries, Okay,
when it comes to money to money, property, et cetera,
(24:31):
it is very unusual that there be a you know, uh,
got to do it in the next ten minutes. Okay,
that's kind of that's kind of unusual, right. I mean,
you can work things out, you can go to probate,
(24:52):
you can get somebody appointed, et cetera, et cetera. Because
money is like you know, property is like it's going
to be there, right, So it's unusual that seconds count
when it comes to the money. So you might as
well have somebody in Fiji if you if you trust them,
if they have the good judgment that you want. Okay,
(25:12):
so go ahead. I mean, pick anybody you want out
of state whatever, for your trustee, for your financial power
of attorney, your agent, under the financial power of attorney. Right,
go ahead, that's perfectly aoka. But healthcare is different. So
if let's say you've got two kids and they're equal, right,
(25:37):
they're equal as far as financial acumen, well, flip a coin.
Ones in state, one's out of state, flip a coin.
It doesn't really matter. Okay, you might want the one
local just because they can lock up the house whatever.
But we've got people traveling in from out of state
who do that just fine. But when it comes to medical,
medical that's different because with medical you want somebody to
(26:02):
be Johnny on the Spot. You want somebody who's living.
If possible. It's not always possible, but if it is possible,
and you got two kids and you're yeah, yeah, the
one be okay, go with the local one. That's the
one time. And when it comes to medical stuff, when
seconds count, hours away, when seconds matter, we're hours away, right,
(26:25):
you don't want that. So with the medical stuff, you
do want somebody who's right there, Johnny on the Spot,
Jane on the Spot, what have you. But go ahead,
go ahead. And with the healthcare, you want the local person.
With finances, it doesn't matter, simple as that. You've been
(26:47):
listening to the David Carrier Show. I'm David Carrier, your
family's personal attorney.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
David's perking and working and taking your calls. Now this
is the David Carrier Show.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
Welcome back to the David Carrier Show. I'm David Carrier,
your family's personal attorney. This is a good I mean,
it's the last segment, so you can call in if
you want, but we're not going to get to you. Sorry,
it's trying to be that's a lump and lump of coal.
In your stocking there if you delayed this long and
see I can't even speak. I'm drinking this hot water
(27:21):
and it's not coffee. I'll tell you that much. Anyway,
Can I be held responsible for ex husband's bill from
nursing home? What ex husband needs nursing home care? He
has severe dementia. They want me to be listed as
a responsible party, and probably what it says is financially
(27:43):
responsible party. That's the whole thing. I know someone needs
to pay his money for care, but if his care
is over his monthly checks, will I be expected to
pay his bills with my money? The answer is no,
you won't. Now when you're going through the when you're
(28:04):
going through the sign in package or right or whatever
it is they want you, they want you to sign
you know, I gotta say, I'm not really sure how
the hell they're doing this, because unless you have power
of attorney for him, unless he named you in a
power of attorney as his agent, I'm not really sure
(28:26):
what authority you have to do this. I mean, again,
that's the problem with these little short emails, because you
could ask a few questions to really clarify things. So
what I'm guessing when I'm it's an ex husband, so
there's no relationship anymore. Okay, And just because you're married
to somebody doesn't automatically make you the person who gets
to manage your finances, sign him in and out of
(28:47):
long term care and stuff. That's a little bit curious there.
But anyway, basically, when you sign somebody in, if you
have their uh, you're their attorney in factor you're signing,
you are not personally responsible, you're not personally liable. Okay,
So whenever you're signing anything like this, and I'd be
(29:10):
really leery of it if you don't have power of
attorney or guardianship right or conservativeship whatever, depending on how
what he's got, or if you're not the See here's
the thing. With Social Security, powers of attorney and guardianship
doesn't work, or conservativeship doesn't work. You have to be
the financial you have to be the designated representative PAE.
(29:34):
With VA, you have to be the fiducial. There's a
whole system with the VA. There's another system with Social
Security which is parallel to but different from the system.
We have the informal power of attorney system or the
more formal probate system. So really, depending on who you're
talking about, there are like four different systems of authority,
(29:56):
all right. There is the typical power of attorney for finances,
which strongly encourage. Then there is the typical I went
to probate court and I've got guardianship conservatorship. There's that one.
Then for social security you have representative PAYE, which is
the Social securities parallel system. And then you've got another
(30:18):
system if it's a VET, and you've got the VA
fiduciary system, and they're all they're all different. You know,
you can avoid probate with the power of attorney, yes
you can't, or trust whatever, Yes you can, but that
doesn't help you with the VA or with social security anyway.
Long story short, don't sign anything you haven't read. If
(30:40):
they give you a bunch of papers, don't just sign it.
And after you sign it, you should put a comma
comma POA. It's short for power of attorney. Okay, you
could also put agent. You could also put there's other
things you could put. But if you put POA, everybody understands.
And if you're really concerned about it, you know, if
(31:01):
you think they're pulling a fast one or if they
can't describe what it is they're doing in ways that
convince you that they know what they're talking about. Because
there are lots of times people have you signed down.
They don't know any more than you do about what's
in those documents. Right, So if you're concerned about that,
before you sign your name, write the words not personally liable, right, okay,
(31:26):
not personally liable, or no personal liability or assuming no
personal liability, something like that, before you sign off representative only.
I mean, there are a bunch of different ways you
can say it, but don't just sign your name. Just
sign your name, okay. Now, if underneath in the signature
(31:47):
block of it says attorney in fact for husband or
ex husband, okay, you can sign that.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
Right.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
You don't have to put the POA. But you know,
when it comes to when it comes to this stuff,
I'm very much a a uh with the Belton suspenders,
you know what I mean? If I can do it, see,
because here's the here's the thing, then this is this
is basic, basic, The basic philosophical approach to all of
(32:17):
this is is you don't get a second chance at this. Okay,
if you're if you're doing if you're agreeing to be
fiduciary for somebody, If you're signing a legal document for somebody, right,
it may be that you're signing yourself up for, you know,
(32:39):
the first circle of hell. Okay, it will be the
first circle of hell. I mean it'd be the first one.
It's not terrible, maybe just purgatory, I don't know, but
it's not the You didn't sign up for the seventh circle. Okay.
You didn't sign up to be part next to the
great Satan. You didn't. No, no, no, I'm just skimming
the edge. I'm just visiting. Right, I'll get see what
(33:03):
I'm saying. Right, So, if you agree to do any
of this stuff, understand that you're taking on a burden. Now,
typically it's a burden of love, it's a burden of care, responsibility.
It's wonderful, it's a wonderful thing to do, right, but
it won't be fun, Okay, and it can explode like
a like a you know those old movies with the
(33:26):
cigars flodes in somebody's face. Right, it can be like that. Okay,
that you were doing the righteous thing, you're doing the
family thing, you're doing the the good thing. All good intentions,
and it turns out that you're you know, terrible. That happens,
but it doesn't always happen, and it doesn't have to
happen if we're very careful about what we're doing. Don't
(33:50):
put your foot in the bear trap, because guess what,
most of the times you can figure out if there's
a bear trap there. Okay, you can. You know, this
stuff can be done in such a way. The documents
can be written in such a way. You can approach
your responsibility in a way that honors the relationship that
you have with this person who named you. Okay, you
(34:11):
can do the good things. You can eat, you know,
and it's good people like you that make the world
go around. The generosity of spirit, it's the willingness to
take like this lady's you know, to her ex husband
and she's still helping out. What a wonderful thing, what
a wonderful, wonderful, generous thing for her to do, all right,
for this guy and apparently it didn't work out for him. Okay, fine,
(34:34):
but she's still willing, you know, to step up. She
just doesn't want to put her foot in the in
the mousetrap, in the bear trap. Okay, she doesn't want that.
Totally understandable. So don't just go into these things, you know,
was it galahad? You know my strength is that of
ten because my heart is pure. Right, well, your heart
(34:55):
may be pure, but it's an impure world, okay, And
you can go into it with all good intentions, right,
which is typically how these the most simple, the worst
cases are you go into it with good intentions, you're
being a good person, and you get trapped. So just
be careful about what you do. So it's a great question.
(35:17):
Put poa after it, put you know, as representative something
like that, because there's no way that you're going to
be personally liable unless you agree to be personally liable.
Just make sure you're not signing some paper that says
personal guarantee or something. Being the financially responsible party means
that you're helping out using his money for him, not
(35:38):
your own money. Just be careful. There, you've been listening
to the David Carrier Show on David Carrier your family's
personal attorney inviting you to the website Davidcarrier law dot com.
Get your further questions. I'll get some guidance on them anyway,
not actually.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
Answers you've been listening to the David Carrier Show, a
lively discussion addressing your questions and concerns, but not legal advice.
(36:13):
There is a big difference, so when making decisions that
affect your family, your property, or yourself, the best advice
is to seek good advice specific to your unique needs.
If you missed any of today's show, or would like
additional information about the law offices of David Carrier, please
visit Davidcarrier Law dot com.
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy, Jess Hilarious, And Charlamagne Tha God!