News of the Week Recap

We take a look at this week in the news....PLUS...AND....THEN....NEXT!

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
You're listening to the downbeat on ninetyseven to one the Freak. I don't
think you can be as exciting asKevin starting the show with family feud.
That's a hard act to follow,it could be, but I was doofing
around on It's amazing how all theTwitter, Instagram, all of them now

(00:21):
have like the TikTok style thing,right, whether it's reels or whatever it
is, I don't even know howI get there. But then I'm just
wiping up and there's just random coolstuff that, you know, it's close
to something I'm interested in. Soon I don't even know what it was
on. I think it maybe Instagram. And it's a little mini sports quiz
for you guys. Are you readyto play? There are four sports locations

(00:43):
north American sports Okay, big fourcities that end in Ton Ton, Okay,
there are four four major sports citiesNorth American major sports cities. I
believe it is just the Big four? Okay, yeah, how many are
there? Four that end in Ton? Basically four big enough cities that have
a professional sports team that end int o N Boston, Boston, Houston,

(01:07):
Houston, Charleston. Charleston doesn't havethey didn't have one. That's too
bad. But I like where Iwas going. You named a pretty big
city that did qualify that it didn'tfit the criteria we're looking for ton Ton
and I got three out of Washington. I got three out of four and
I missed Washington, Washington Commanders.That's three, okay, and let's go

(01:36):
ton going through the divisions in myhead now, both we're looking for ANGELUS
major Americans or North American sports citiesthat end in T O N. We
have Boston, Houston, and Washington, the New York, New Jersey.
If if Texters beat you to it, they will they win. I bet

(01:59):
there's a hockey hockey on this.Oh yeah, maybe up there Edmonton.
Edmonton got it. Yep, yep, yeah, Tonto. That's not real.
Would have not been good. No, their jobs, learn something.
Go to your water cooler. Playthat game. It took what one minute?

(02:21):
You guys had fun? I did. I had fun presenting it.
And I imagine somebody listening enjoyed theinformation that they received. Do that at
the water cooler and then tell themwhere you heard it. Yeah on a
podcast. Two days later, I'velistened to wrote an email, and I
want to read it to you guysreal quick. It's got a question for
you, Mike about something good.First of all, he says, he

(02:45):
said a lot of nice words,and he said, next, purple grass
and Elma learns how to drive?Where did he go? And who's he
hiding from? Plus what do theclouds think about the Supreme Court ruling?
Are we in for a rude awakening? Okay? He said? Uh.

(03:05):
He said that he had a questionfor you, Mike about a twelve hour
race in a town called Seabring,Florida. Sure, seb Ri, I
n g Seabring. He said,he met a girl there. She's gonna
move here soon. But he said, the reason I wanted to ask,
Mike is not because Florida in general, but Seabring is the biggest town.
Isn't the biggest town and hasn't anevent called the twelve hour race or something?

(03:27):
Well, twenty four hours of SeabringI believe. Okay, maybe they
have twelve He did not know twelvehours of Seabring. Okay, Before you
answer that, I'm gonna finish hisemail. He says, Also, I'm
a massive hockey fan. Tim cans a d oh huh. You know
it's Jim, by the way,and I don't think Jim. Jim's fine.

(03:49):
Jim's still on vacation in Colorado.Yep, he said. I'm a
Penguins fan though, But that beingsaid, the stars are killer this year.
Generally, genuinely think this might bethe year, kind of like the
Cowboys last year. But thank godDaddy Jones isn't involved. Anyways, Let's
stay tuned for Dave Matthews and PuffDaddy went Bowling, plus insecticide and swing

(04:12):
sets and Madonna. What's the connection? Stay tuned and find out more on
ninety seven one in the free creativeemail fun to read. Yeah, but
what's going on with this race andSabring Florida? What do you? What
do you? I don't know whatI can provide to you. I can
confirm that Seabring is a place inFlorida, in central Florida. Check.
There is a race track there andthey do what I always thought was the

(04:33):
twenty four hours of Sebring, butthey have the twelve hours of Sebring as
well. It's like when you havethe sticker on your back windshield that says
thirteen point one, Yeah, thatmeans you participated in the twelve hours of
c Yeah, exactly, just havesy. I will tell you this though.
We used to race go carts,right, and we used to travel this
Florida circuit racing go carts, mybrother and I. My dad wants to

(04:53):
be race car drivers. And wewent to Seabring and we went one year
and just got annihilated. And mydad, who's an engineer, it's like,
you know what something's wrong here,Like basically we're it's like any form
of racing if he ain't cheating,ain't trying, you know. And my
dad was like, I can justsee it in the straightaways. We don't
have the power that they have.So my brother was racing and my dad

(05:15):
did something to his engine. Rightthe next year and Cash was the fastest
boy on track by a long shot, right, so much so that he's
spun out in one turn, didn'tlose his lead, was still crushing people,
so he is ripping it. Mybrother didn't know, you know,
my brother was just trying to raceand he's winning by so much my dad,
and then you pass one part wherethe pits aar and you know,

(05:35):
my brother can see my dad's hezipspy and my dad's on the side of
the track, just going slow down, slow down, You're gonna get this
engine torn to piece. He kindof just doing the handdown, slow it
down, buddy, you're gonna winthis thing. He just loosened the governor.

(05:56):
That's probably what he did. Morecomplex than that, but essentially,
as because I was my age,division had a restrictor plate, a restricted
amount of air that could go inthe carburetor, and that's it. It
was like, you know, ifthis much as allowed than the restrictor plate
resists the amount of air, andmy dad would be in there shaving out
the rest because you could see itsticking out of the top of the Brigton
strit and so it's like, oh, yeah, it's still in there,

(06:17):
but I shaved out just a littlebit. Give that slide advantage. Got
to make plays. Love it.They're all doing it. Zebring. Yeah,
so he's bringing a girl here.That's good. Well, welcome to
the Metroplex. Another great Floridian comingto enrich the state of Texas. Dude,
the Stars are going to be theone seed in the West. There's

(06:39):
your Stars note for the day.They're gonna be the one. I think
I don't know what training. Theydo you know this? And no joke?
Are they like the Scary Boy,the Danger Man and hockey right now?
Like is the whole league on?We don't want none of the st
because we think that a little bitwith the Mavericks. But they're not even
really near a one seed of theStars, the Scary Boys and all hockey.

(07:00):
I think they are. Okay,they're fifty twenty one and nine in
the West. At least, they'rethe best team in the entire Western Conference.
Oh my, there's fifty they're thebest team. No, no,
no, okay, New York Rangersare fifty. Yeah, they're the Rangers
are ridiculous. How many games inhand are there? Okay? They're fifty
three, twenty three and four theNew York Rangers and after and they have

(07:23):
one hundred and ten points. Okay, And the Stars are fifty twenty one
to nine with one hundred and ninepoints, so they're by metrics, they're
the second best team in hockey.And Boston's really good too. But Yees
Stars ninety seven percent chance they willthey will win the Central Division. That's
over. So when does the hockeyplayoffs start? I've looked it up just
a minute ago. There it isMonday, the twenty second. All right,

(07:44):
ten days. They think like aweek off because their last game Sunday.
Well, I think they have allthe I don't know if they play
in but they have all their Idon't know. They have some first round
of things that doesn't involve the WesternConference champs. We get home ice for
the whole thing. Seems like it. Oh maybe it starts on Saturday the

(08:05):
twentieth. People can be so madwhen we get tickets, Like on the
glass, we're just head to toeGreen. We don't like about him.
We haven't been any games. Ihaven't even really watched much. And like
they advance out of the first roundand the camera cuts to the crowd going
nuts, and then they show Kevin. He's just like wiping tears from his
eye. I was here and he'smouthing to me and Danny we're here,

(08:28):
We are here, and I'm dressedlike a horse. Yeah, Danny's dressed
like a cow. And Cavios thetwentieth is the place. So next Friday,
next Saturday, the playoffs start.I'm going be in Italy. You
guys have fun, but you areOur nights are about to get loaded.
With especially when we f and Clippers. With the MAVs, we're about to

(08:52):
get saddled with nine and nine thirtytips. Glad, Glad to do it
all Rock three and a half hoursis leap in here every day if it
means I'm getting to watch my stinkingMavericks in the playoffs. It's the best.
Yes, it's the best until thenext playoff team comes around. It's
like playoff hockey is literally the best, and the baseball happens, it's the

(09:13):
best. It's just great when you'rein we've been lucky and we can't even
remember. Imagine the like waking upon the morning of a Cowboy NFC title
game, right, I don't,I can't even I don't know what that
feels like. Yeah, you weretwelve, I think here, and I

(09:35):
didn't care about the Cowboys. Iwas. I was like, damn it,
the Cowboys, you're gonna beat metoday. Playoff hockey is number one.
Though I was in my early twentiesand times were good around here.
God, that stop winking so muchat me. I stop winking. I
was watching this normal the number twoin front of your face. Norm McDonald

(09:58):
jokes and why are you sticking yourtongue out like that. It's a bit
some weird. So those Norm McDonaldjokes is watching. He had a joke.
Remember it was Super Bowl twenty nineand this is when the forty nine
Ers dunked on the Chargers, theStan Humphrees Chargers. So he did the
joke and he's like, oh,the super Bowl was last week and the
forty nine Ers beat the Chargers,but the game's still going. Here's the

(10:22):
score, And he showed the scoreand it was like eight thousand to seven,
and then the next week it wasstill going one million to seven.
He like a quick scoreboard update.They've been playing the whole time. It
was really fun to watch these jokeschronologically. And in order we'll get to
that at seven thirty. We're notgonna do an intro for the most important

(10:43):
thing in the world. Don't evendo anything like that, Maddie, if
you would mind, we crank myaudio up real quick. Here is what
happened, and what the week inthe week in the news. It's it's
you know, this is a littleless exciting, I would think than usual
earthquake. Then totally eclipse chaser hegot and crane collapse how could anyone survive

(11:09):
this? They did? Plus ballLord, then it clips disaster and he
does windows? Is that the pilotfixing a window? Should we be concerned?
Plus eclips freak out? Why amI hurt right now? Plus Gypsy
Rose she just got a nose job. Then the little pilot is dead,

(11:35):
plus the TV chef, then thedeath of O. J. Simpson.
No, there's no, there's noreal information earthquake, plus the chef crank
collapse. Who could survive it?They did? Play it again? You're

(12:01):
adding you add that scream that there'sthat guy and then there's a scream when
the crane collapses. Yeah, there'salso there's a I don't know if it's
on this one, but there's onewhere it's a wolf and the beggar.
Yeah, alright, you're adding those. You're sneaky. There's the same,
there's the same. Yeah, that'sthat's twice. I heard it twice.

(12:24):
But he are you adding those?Non swear? I would tell you guys,
if I was I was gonna doI shouldn't have time because I was
doing this other thing for OJ,but I was gonna put Danny's breaking news
of OJ dying. Oh yeah,what should be a promo on our station
today, you know, breaking newsOJ died. And then that is like

(12:46):
I was gonna pull that shit timeman Stepp for seven thirty. What a
great promo that would be. Icannot tell you a how little time I
had for last night's meeting, bhow annoying I was to my life partner.
She's like, are we going storyget things? She's like, we're
gonna get some like you know,get some get some chicken wings, you

(13:07):
know, but they're they're not friedbecause you get them and you just put
them in the air fire. It'sa little more healthy. It's then you
know, it's also having deliciously.The point is when are we gonna get
this? When are we gonna getin the car and you go to the
store, and I was like,hold on, let me finish season twenty
two of Saturday Night Live and thenwe can go. Can I ask you
this because I know you spent fivehours compiling like old seasons and looking for

(13:30):
norm jokes and the book and theindex. I think it's six hours.
And then right about the moment youfinished on Twitter, I saw and I
sent it to you, the elevenminute perfect compilation of every oj Joe that
was Tough, which I had sentto him about four hours before that.
Yeah, but I googled it,like with thew J news hit. I
googled it here during the show yesterdayand I found a thirty four minute one

(13:50):
too. But then as I startedgoing, I watched a little bit when
I got home, and I went, Okay, I can probably throw the
Masters on here and then record thisin And then I watched the first like
and then I was like, ohyeah, I've got them all on my
little secret passport of TV and justwent and I was like, this will

(14:13):
be funnier if we go in chronologicalorder. As you see the context.
You do see the context of himlike kind of going out of his way
to issue the same joke over andover. Man, he was flying in
the face of authority. That's whyhe was doing that. I love that
about it. He was doing itin season one. His first two seasons,

(14:33):
he was more nervous. Is thefirst uh weekend update joke? Like
the week that it happened. Itwas the week no, because it happened
in the summer, so they weren'ton. It was like three months after.
Okay, but you know, andI had to, dude, I
had to do. I had toedit down some of the ones that weren't
as good just because we don't havetime to do a twenty four hour O.

(14:54):
J. Simpson Norm MacDonald segment.But it was fun worth it.
Yeah, unless the segment sucks seventhirty, we'll find out about to hit
the course. Guys, how muchlonger? Seven minutes? I need a
welcome distraction on the third tiny TVbecause seriously, sitting where I sit,

(15:15):
and I have two big screens flankingme, and you have NBC five Weather
and Channel four Weather, I feellike I'm watching a tennis match at Hooters.
I mean it is back and forth. You get Samantha Davies and Chip
Wagoner on the ship. What ChipWagoner's doing the traffic? Yeah, sweet

(15:37):
sweet Kyle, Kylie's telling me whatthe temps are, bro Kylie day,
oh boy, try to like lookat me and look at Kevin, and
our eye contact last about a seconduntil his eyes dart above and left of
my head. Uh huh. Thatis the best part of Fridays. But
in fairness, right directly in linewith Kevin, I have the TV behind
you, and you got Fox.Come on tiger plays at him and pay

(16:02):
your ESPN bill. Earthquake, thentotally eclipse chaser he got and crane collapse.
How could anyone survive this? Theydid? Plus ball Lord, then
eclipse disaster and he does windows?Is that the pilot fixing a window?

(16:26):
Should we be concerned? Plus eclipsefreak out? Why am I right now?
Plus Gypsy Rose, she just gota nose job? Then the pilot
is dead. Plus the TV chefdid the death of O. J.
Simpson? The pilot is dead.Oh no, that's so good. That

(16:57):
is the most important thing in theworld. World is that one and a
half minute clip of audio you bringevery week? You guys fans of the
Great American field Trip? I don'tknow what that is. Great American road
trip? He has driven around thenation on the road. The USA today
has opened up voting for the bestroad side attractions in the United States,

(17:19):
and off the top of my head, I couldn't name a single one that
roadside. What is the roadside attraction? The world's largest ball of yarn in
the oh or south of the borderwhere you can see Pedro the puppy dog
between South and North Carolina. Didyou hear some of these nominees. Did
you're on top of the Bonnie andClyde Ambush Museum, Louisiana? Yeah?

(17:41):
Is that treevy? Uh? Itis Gibbsland, Louisiana. We had a
guy on from there, didn't we. I think we did actually, unlike
the anniversary of that, Yeah,runs that museum because it's right by the
road where that ambush. Yeah,and it's kind of off the beaten path
and not in a very populated area, so to go to it, you've

(18:02):
got to make a real effort.The Cabazon Dinosaurs in Cabazon, California.
Oh, you know what, Ithink it's a park of one hundred dinosaurs.
That's what was in a Peewee's BigAdventure, all right. Yeah.
I think of the another Route sixtysixty type area where they have the cars

(18:22):
that are half buried in the ground. Yeah, what's it called Stonehenge?
It's called something. There's a coolname for it. I think of that
smart name for it. There's stoneHinge for cars. The Texas one is
Cadillac Ranch. That's it. That'sgot to be it. Amarillo. Oh
it's called car Hinge. Is itreally? Yeah? Is it not called

(18:47):
ranch? Well? I think there'smore than one, but this one's located
near Alliance, Nebraska. They're reallycool. They you know, they're perfectly
angled and painted different colors. It'sit's a work of art, miikey a
work of desert cart different one.What about the Prada Museum in Marfa.
That's a good one. Is thaton there? Oh see, yes,

(19:07):
see yeah, where you can seethe lights? Right, I'll play Well,
it's not a game, it's ohyeah, but yeah. You know
Carhinge on their Alliance, Nebraska.Yeah, Casey Jones Village, Jackson,
Tennessee. Railroad Engineer Dalmatian fire hydrant, Beaumont, Texas. There is a
huge ass fire hydrant that looks likea Dalmatian. How that fire hydrant's almost

(19:30):
as big as the firehouse. Youcan't see that? Yeah, I can't.
That's a big ass fire twenty fourfeet tall. Mike. We got
cute that thing is. It's cute. I don't know if I drive a
Boma for it. But the EaselProject in Kansas, a twenty four foot
by thirty two foot van go painting. All right, Oh that's a sunflower

(19:55):
that's kind of neat. Lucy theElephant in New Jersey. Nope, big
elephant. I don't know. Idon't know. I don't know if these
things. I never think about stoppinghere, and it's more like family vacation
as a kid, I guess asI haven't gone on a formal vacation until
the super highways have ruined that becausethose are more, you know, a

(20:18):
little smaller, sure, smaller typeinterstates. That's all I got. I've
never been to Vada. Seven MagicMountains Mike No. Twenty five miles south
of Las Vegas. Seven Magic Mountains. No. I don't know what that
is. Skunk Ape headquarters in Florida. Never heard of it. Sometimes called

(20:47):
the Sasquatch of the Southeast. Theskunk Ape is rumored to live in the
Everglades. Do you know where Okapeeis? I don't know, but there's
a lot of little towns that havenames like that. Wheat Jesus, Oh,
Kansas. It's a seventy foot tallbillboard. If you guys ever done

(21:07):
Jesus standing in a wheat field.A giant corn maze. No small ones,
but you're doing like a real hugeone. That's a good bit.
There's the world's largest ball of twine. I think Chevy Chase referenced that in
vacation, right, But they weregoing to go see the second largest world's
largest frying pan, North Carolina.I mean, if you knew, you're

(21:32):
driving on the road and there's abig sign that says the world's largest frying
pan. Exit, Now your bodyjust starts to put that blinker on and
pin how tired of us? Butwhat am I doing out here? I'm
going to see that? How ifI'm running late to my destination? No,
uh huh. Everybody's running late atall times. So yeah, yes,

(21:55):
nobody wants to stop and smell theflowers, Kevin, But this is
the biggest and the whole world.And we've also learned that like everything else,
and it's very Carnival Barker. It'sover sell, under deliver, freak
show at the fair. You're notgonna believe the world's smallest horse and it's
just a pony. Yeah, they'vedug out, they've dug out a thing

(22:17):
behind the hay bail. He's outthe size of that hay bale. He's
in a little pit. They trickyou are the world's fattest man in nineteen
are in eighteen fifty and there's aguy who's like two hundred pounds. Could
you believe it? This piece ofgarbage needs to loose some weight, right,

(22:38):
he's obese and nowadays he looks likemirror two hundred love to be two
hundred pounds. Just think, Mikey, I could have been in the eighteen
hundreds. You could have been theworld's fattest man. He eates and he
eats. You never seen that.And the world's past man still and he's

(22:59):
his dude, who's yeah fat,And he's just sitting there in a chair
watching TV or whatever. You paya couple of bucks to walk by,
all right, you've heard the MicRehners story about when he was a little
kid and went to the fair andthey had to advertise the world's Fattest man.
And he said, yeah, Iwent in there and it's just this
big guy sitting in a chair,and if you gave him an extra dollar,
he'd stand up fish out another buck. He's kind of just making him

(23:26):
get up a dollar, just adollar. He just kind of sighs.
He's like, come take the dollar, come get it, because he knows
he's only getting like thirty cents outof that dollar. Yeah, just see
tiny Reiner with his glasses. Wouldyou pull over to see the world's fattest
man? Absolutely? Yeah? Orwoman? And nowadays with the irony of

(23:49):
everything, if they're selling merch anda coffee much Oh yeah, hint the
world's fattest mand T shirt. That'sawesome. By the way, I'll start
my nastacar bet one Monday with mycar T shirt. Did it arrive?
Yes? And I are today becauseme and Mica are going up to PGA
Frisco. Yeah. That seems likethe serfect opportunity. Well, you know,
I want to play the Part threecourse and you know I want to

(24:10):
make sure you know, you wantto treat that place with respect. Yeah,
it's it's the American Home of golfnow. Yeah, but what says
I love golf more than a realbusy NASCAR T shirt? Bill Elliott did
love golf, did he? Speakingof late, it's the exhibition of the
gods, the Masters. Boy,do we have some action yesterday. Tiger

(24:32):
Woods is on the prowl. Folks. I know for all of you that
don't care about golf, you docare about Tiger. He's going to make
the cup. He is laying inthe weeds hiding in the grass, and
he's about to pounce on his prey. But he was not the big story
yesterday. The big story yesterday wasprotein next to ninety seven one to free