Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
The following is a paid podcast. iHeartRadio's hosting of this
podcast constitutes neither an endorsement of the products offered or
the ideas expressed. The following program is sponsored by New
York Priority Medical Care. Now it's time for the Laws
of Your Money, a weekly call in show with legal
(00:20):
tips to help you protect your money. Here's your host
and Margaret Caroza.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Hello, and welcome to the Laws of your Money. This
is a show dedicated to protecting you from legal and
financial mayhem when it comes to personal finance. I believe
that the single most important thing is protecting ourselves legally,
(00:47):
because what does it matter how diligently I save and
how brilliantly I invest if there is a greater than
forty percent chance of losing assets to a long term
illness and expensive divorce taxes. This could be capital gains taxes,
(01:07):
estate taxes, not to mention ordinary lawsuits. We all know
we're living in a very litigious society, but it comes
as a shock to many people to learn that we
are more likely to be involved in litigation with former
(01:27):
loved ones than with strangers. I think we all have
potential legal land minds in our lives, whether we're in
a second marriage, worried about blended family warfare later, or
we have a special needs loved one or an elderly
relative and we're concerned about them losing their home to
(01:52):
a nursing home if they need long term care. I
am a state planning and asset protection attorney and Margaret
Carosa joined today by my esteemed colleague and co host,
the Reverend Paul Slatcus. Welcome to the program.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Paul Niics Anne, Nice to see you, you too.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
I encourage all of you, if you have a question
about loved ones and finances and legal issues, to join
the conversation by calling one eight hundred three to one
zero sevent ten. Today we're going to talk about the
(02:35):
dues and don'ts of inheritance issues. And I believe we
have a caller, okay, who is joining the program.
Speaker 4 (02:47):
Hello and Margaret.
Speaker 5 (02:48):
Hello, what's your name?
Speaker 4 (02:52):
Hi? My name is Nico.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
How are you Welcome to the program. Nico, what's going
on in your life?
Speaker 4 (03:00):
Well, thank you so much for taking my call. I
just had a question. And while you're on the topic
of inheritance, Unfortunately, my mother, who I love very much,
passed away seven years ago. I'm sorry, it was thank you,
it was. It was a very hard time for the family.
(03:21):
My father wanted to get remarried afterwards.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
As they often do forgive me please continue.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
As they often do. My younger brother and I were
you know, we tried to be very supportive. I was
just starting college at that time, so it was a
transitional time, but we wanted to support my dad. Unfortunately,
my father also passed away recently. I'm sorry, it's okay,
(03:54):
but you know, in his in his uh planning after
you know, he passed away, he always told us before
that if anything happened, my brother and I would get
the house after his new wife, my stepmom passes away.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
But was this okay, Sorry to interrupt, but was this
a house that he bought with your mother?
Speaker 6 (04:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (04:25):
Yeah, So that's why it's emotionally so big for me
and my brother because you know, we grew up in
this house, and you know, the wall decor is still
the painting is that my mother put out. So you know,
it means a lot for me and my brother and
we want, you know, to be able to go into
(04:47):
the house and you know, get our personal effects, and
we respect my father's wishes that he wanted my step
mom to be able to stay in the house. Unfortunately,
she's not letting my brother and I have access to
the house to get our belongings. She's not letting us
go in even you know, it's not just about the belongings.
(05:10):
I want to see the house one more time, and
you know, again with what my dad said, my brother
and I get the house when she passes away. But
until then, is there any way we can I guess
legally make her let us in. You know, I guess
(05:31):
I don't know what to do, and I'm one as
you can help me.
Speaker 2 (05:34):
Oh dear, Okay, So the devil is in the details here,
so you know, hopefully obviously I haven't seen any of
the relevant documents, right, so this is not an uncommon scenario,
unfortunately for people in your position who reasonably want access
(05:59):
to what was their family home, you know, to have
access to their things. So, you know, the worst possible scenario,
and hopefully this is not your case, is that your
father and stepmother did wills that said everything goes to
(06:20):
each other and then upon the death of the survivor,
it would go to you and your brother. That would
be terrible because your stepmother would then be free to
redo the planning because she was the survivor. So hopefully
you don't have that situation. I also hope that your
(06:45):
father did not give your stepmother what's called a life
estate or lifetime ownership rights. And at first glance, this
seems like a good solution, right, So your father says
that this woman can live in the home for the
(07:07):
rest of her life and then upon her death it
goes to you and your brother. That sounds okay, but
the reality is, in that scenario, if your stepmother has
to go to a nursing.
Speaker 5 (07:22):
Home, you are stuck.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
You still can't enter the home because she's technically alive.
And in that scenario, your stepmother would be free to
move to Florida, and then she could rent the house
out and she could pocket all of the rental income.
She could even remarry, and now she and her new
(07:46):
husband are living in your parents' home. You know, those
are the scenarios that people don't really think about in advance,
but we need to. What is hopefully the case is
that your father gave her a right of occupancy until
(08:07):
the earlier of her voluntary departure. Her permanent stay in
a nursing facility or hospital, or obviously her death, at
which point the house reverts to you and your brother, and.
Speaker 5 (08:24):
You need to go further.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
You need to say in the meantime, who is financially
responsible for the property insurance, for property taxes, for paying utilities,
for capital improvements. You know, you could have a situation
where there's a leak in the roof and your stepmother
(08:48):
and her family say, well, we don't really want to
get involved with a big capital expense that's only going
to benefit Nico and his brother down the road. So
you really have to spell all of these things out.
I recommend, Nico that you reach out to your father's
attorney and see if they will share information with you
(09:11):
and if there's anything you know that they would suggest
that you do. And if they don't help you, I well,
let me ask you this question. Did you get along
with her when your father was alive or kind of
sort of you just try to, you know, keep up
(09:33):
appearances on holidays for the sake of your father.
Speaker 6 (09:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (09:39):
I mean, on the one hand, we definitely did try
to stay diplomatic. But there's also the you know, I'm
have to think about my younger brother, and I want
to set an example for him. So it was sort
of like we got along, but it was a little
bit tense. But the other issue is, and I want
to ask you about the she has two kids, my
(10:04):
step siblings, and I'm wondering, if you know, I'm thinking,
what if she dies and the kids her kids, you know,
won't leave. So is that a scenario?
Speaker 5 (10:17):
Oh my goodness, what would I do then?
Speaker 2 (10:20):
This, Paul, this is sounding to me like a law
school final exam question where you have a bunch of
different legal issues in there to sort out. Yeah, that
is not an uncommon scenario.
Speaker 5 (10:38):
When she dies.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
If there are people living in the home, you are
not allowed to engage in what's called self help. You
can't call a locksmith and have the locks changed. If
there are people living in there, even though your father
never gave them explicit permission to live there, they're living there,
(11:05):
and you have like a quasi squatter situation. And now
you would have to go to a landlord tenant attorney
to sort all of that out. And it goes back
to the planning. Your father could have said that her
right of occupancy ends upon her cohabitation with any other
(11:31):
people who is not a paid caregiver. But is there
anyone on the other side. Are you friendly with any
of these step siblings that maybe you could reach out
to one of them and say, look, give us a
break here, we just want to get our things.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
My older stepbrother and I were I think he feels
for our situation, but he's also you know, he'll always
be team mom, so there's not much I can do there.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
Listen, this is what I recommend that you do. Reach
out to me. You know, after the show you can
email me through the website. It's my asset Protection Attorney
dot com. And at the very least, I will work
with you to craft a nice, diplomatic but firm letter
(12:30):
to your stepmother explaining your position and uh, let's see
where we go from there.
Speaker 5 (12:38):
Does that sound first?
Speaker 2 (12:41):
All right, thank you so much for calling Nico, and
please do reach out to me.
Speaker 5 (12:46):
I want to help you.
Speaker 4 (12:49):
Thank you, Thank you so much.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
Stomach ache.
Speaker 2 (12:52):
Yeah, no, this poor kid. He sounds like a nice person.
And yeah, it's a tough situation. And on the other
side of the spectrum, you know, looking at it from
the stepmother's point of view, she may be getting advice
(13:12):
not to let the adult children in the house, because
what if they go back to their childhood bedrooms and
now she can't get them out. So when we have
a blended family situation, it is critically important that, like
(13:33):
a game of chess, that you try to anticipate all
of the future collisions and problems that might occur. You know,
I always say when loved ones and finances collide, the
results can be explosive.
Speaker 5 (13:54):
And you know.
Speaker 2 (13:55):
All of these estate planning and asset protection measures. Is
our last act as a parent, right, what can I
do to protect my children from being involved in difficult
situations later?
Speaker 3 (14:15):
Starting with a will, starting with a little good lawyer
who's smart and has been through this.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
Starting with a will, But I hope we don't end
with a will. Right, We should all have a will,
but the will.
Speaker 5 (14:27):
Goes to where does it go? It goes to probe.
We want to trust.
Speaker 2 (14:34):
We should all have a will, but the goal is
not to have to use it. I believe we have
another caller joining us.
Speaker 6 (14:44):
Hi, my name is My name is Randy. I have
a problem, and I mean I've been listening to your
show for a while and I didn't think i'd ever call.
But here I am calling. My mother passed away in
the past.
Speaker 5 (15:00):
I'm sorry, and.
Speaker 6 (15:02):
She left the house, her house to three ways to
me and my sister and my brother. My sister and
I want to sell it, but my.
Speaker 7 (15:13):
Brother, who by the way, has been living there.
Speaker 6 (15:16):
Since before she passed away, doesn't want to sell it
and he won't even let real estate agents in. So
there anything I can do, Okay.
Speaker 5 (15:27):
So how long has your brother been living in the house.
Speaker 6 (15:31):
Well, now about two years. He's separated from his wife.
I think they're going to get divorced.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
So he started living with your mother when his marriage
was on the rocks.
Speaker 7 (15:47):
Yeah, and he supposedly I helped out taking care of
my mother who was ill towards the end, and although
she did have an aid, but he was sort of
helped me out.
Speaker 5 (15:58):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
And the will or the trust simply says a three
way distribution.
Speaker 5 (16:05):
End of story.
Speaker 6 (16:08):
Yeah, it's just a will a will, Okay.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
So you know the problem there is in the estate
planning in that when we have a child living with us,
and there's a record number have you been hearing this, Paul,
A record number of adult children moving back in with
(16:32):
elderly parents. You know, sometimes it's to help take care
of the parent. But in the cases I see, it's
because the adult children are having financial difficulties and you
know housing, you know what rents are like, and interest
rates are up. People are unable to afford homes and mortgages,
(16:57):
so a lot of people are moving.
Speaker 5 (17:00):
Yeah. No, no, it's insane. So what we need to.
Speaker 2 (17:04):
Do if we have an adult children who has moved
back into the house, we need to revisit the estate
planning to deal with how long do we want this
child to be able to stay. You know, it's unfair
to the child living with us to just ignore the situation.
Speaker 5 (17:26):
Right Do we say they have six.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
Months to continue to reside there to make other arrangements?
Speaker 5 (17:33):
Do they have a year? Do they have two years?
Speaker 2 (17:38):
But absent that, I think you, your sister and brother
should sit down and come up with a reasonable solution.
Have you tried to talk to your brother and does
he tell you when he may leave?
Speaker 7 (17:57):
Well, I've tried, but he he will be.
Speaker 6 (18:02):
Filing for divorce and he says that he doesn't want
to share the protea proceeds of the sale with the
ex wife. Oh boy, And I was under the impression
that when you inherit something. It does it's not part
of the divorce. But I'm not a lawyer.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Okay, Well, Paul, what is your guests as a smart person,
if you inherit something and then you get divorced, does
your soon to be ex spouse have an interest in
the inheritance?
Speaker 3 (18:36):
I might be smart, but I might not know the answer,
But I kind of think that the answer is no.
Speaker 2 (18:44):
So if you are on a game show or in
a law school final exam, the correct answer is that
gifted and inherited assets are separate property, not subject to
equitable distribution. And in real life, a judge in a
(19:10):
matrimonial dissolution can and often will find a way to
give your soon to be expouse some piece of whatever
you might have. And you know, we see this with
lottery winners, or someone is about to get some big bonus,
(19:32):
some year end bonus at work, and they don't want
to receive these assets until after the divorce is finalized.
But I think, you know, it wouldn't take a detective
in your case, Randy, to figure out that the mother
has died and there's a house there, and I think
(19:57):
she's already told her lawyer all about it. So I
don't think your brother is improving his situation at all
by holding up the sale of the house. And you know,
obviously it's costing all of you money with each month
that goes by. Who's paying for the expenses, the property taxes,
(20:20):
the property insurance, the utilities? Is he paying that on
his own?
Speaker 6 (20:26):
Well, so far he's paid for all the costs. Yeah,
all the expenses. But that's just you know, for not
even for a year, you know.
Speaker 2 (20:36):
Yeah, Well, listen, I think the most important thing is
that you all stay amicable, because I have seen this
exact situation and with someone in your brother's situation saying
that he needs to be reimbursed from the ultimate sale
(20:59):
proceeds for property taxes and insurance that he has laid
out from the time of your mother's death.
Speaker 6 (21:06):
Hopefully sure, And I wouldn't have a problem with that,
I don't think. But does it matter I was actually
appointed executor of the will. Does that give me some
sort of power over him or not?
Speaker 5 (21:17):
No?
Speaker 2 (21:18):
No, So executor of the will means you have to
follow the guidelines of the will. You have no ability
to customize it or to shape it. But having a
will is in your brother's favor because he has an
(21:38):
eight month delay before you're even able to get to
a closing table. Right, so you are the executor in
all likelihood will hire an attorney and you will go
to surrogates court in the county in which you live,
and you can expect.
Speaker 5 (21:58):
An eight month process.
Speaker 2 (22:02):
So you know, again, I think it's worthwhile for you,
your sister and brother to sit down tell him he's
not gaining anything in his upcoming divorce by refusing to
sell the home. Now, if you want to come into
my office, reach out to me after the show, and
(22:24):
you can email me through my asset Protection Attorney dot com.
Speaker 5 (22:31):
Good luck with it, Randy.
Speaker 6 (22:33):
Thank you so much. I appreciate it.
Speaker 5 (22:36):
Take care.
Speaker 3 (22:36):
Another complicated scenario.
Speaker 2 (22:38):
Yeah, no, these scenarios come up every week. I get
calls like this in my office, and you know, there's
hardly a day that goes by where these issues are
not in the newspaper. Right, I think we should start
having a segment, you know, and in the news. Did
(23:01):
you read this week about former Governor David Patterson?
Speaker 3 (23:06):
I heard something, but I didn't hear that. Remember the details.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
So former Governor David Patterson, who I have had the
pleasure to meet when I was a legislator, nicest guy
in the world. He brought suit this past week against
his brother Daniel, who he is alleging helped himself to
(23:31):
his deceased mother's entire estate before she died. So, Missus
Patterson died in the summer of twenty twenty four. She
left a will saying everything even Stephen between her two
sons David and Daniel, and lo and behold there are
(23:55):
no assets left in the estate or minim assets. Daniel
was the executor and apparently filed a probate petition alleging
that the estate assets were less than thirty thousand dollars
when there was an estate of seven million before Missus
(24:19):
Patterson died. So the question is and David Patterson issuing
his brother for the value of three point five million
what he estimates his half of the estate should have been.
Speaker 5 (24:33):
So this case, if.
Speaker 2 (24:35):
It doesn't settle, is going to be a nightmare because
it's hard to prove when we're dealing with a deceased person.
Did she want to give Daniel her entire estate? Now,
obviously that would have been her choice. If she decided
(24:59):
that she did not want to leave the estate equally
for whatever reason, maybe one child was helping her and
the other child wasn't, Or did Daniel take the money
without missus Patterson knowing about it, Or if he was
(25:19):
her appointed executor under the will, maybe he was also
her appointed agent under a power of attorney and that
would have allowed him. Depending upon the scope of the
power of attorney, that could have enabled him to go
to the broker, go around town to the various banks.
(25:42):
There would have to be several different banking institutions involved
given the amount of the estate, so that everything would
be covered by FDIC insurance. You know, did he exceed
his authority given to him by the mother and helped
(26:03):
himself to the estate assets. In any event, you can
imagine that this is a scenario that will do irreparable
harm to family relationships.
Speaker 3 (26:17):
Sure, you know you said the thing you started. You
start the show by saying forty percent of potential lawsuits
are going to come from family related scenarios.
Speaker 2 (26:28):
Yeah, the overwhelming majority of lawsuits will be with someone
that we have shared Thanksgiving dinner.
Speaker 5 (26:37):
Or a pillow with.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
Right, we become fierce litigants in battle, So we'll continue
to monitor the Patterson estate situation.
Speaker 3 (26:50):
Do you think the mindset iste this will never happen
to me?
Speaker 5 (26:53):
Of course, of course.
Speaker 2 (26:55):
And I think as a parent, we want to hope
for the best, and you know, we want to think.
Speaker 5 (27:00):
That our children will honor our memory.
Speaker 2 (27:05):
By being amicable and civil and amiable.
Speaker 5 (27:10):
With each other.
Speaker 2 (27:11):
But other people become involved. Once spouses enter the mix,
everything is on its head. And again, we want to
avoid probate. We can better customize all of these issues
when we're dealing with a trust you in again Randy's situation,
(27:33):
the brother who is staying in the house trying to
frustrate a quick sale of the house is benefiting by
the fact that they are involved in a lengthy probate.
And when I say eight months, that is if there
are no problems. Eight months is the absolute minimum. When
(27:55):
we have estranged relatives or relatives with developmental disability psychiatric diagnosis,
the probate can be much longer. Now I have a
client who passed away, and it turned out that when
he was in college, he was a sperm donor and
(28:20):
he and his friends would do this to help with
living expenses and lo and behold in this age of
twenty three and meters in ancestry dot com. It turned
out that he had two children out there that surfaced.
Speaker 5 (28:39):
And you know, this is.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
A situation where he should not have relied on a will.
He should have had a trust because the trust avoids
probate and we don't have to notify all of these people.
So you, Paul, are free to disinherit anyone you wish,
but your airs at law are required to be notified
(29:06):
in a probate situation.
Speaker 5 (29:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (29:09):
I'm exhausted, and just like.
Speaker 5 (29:11):
That, we are out of time.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
Please reach out to me during the week at my
lawyer ann on Instagram and my asset Protection Attorney dot com.
Hope you will join us next Sunday ten thirty am
here on WOR seven ten am. Have a great day everyone.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
The preceding program was sponsored by New York Priority Medical Care.
The preceding was a paid podcast. iHeartRadio's hosting of this
podcast constitutes neither an endorsement of the products offered or
the ideas expressed.
The following is a paid podcast. iHeartRadio's hosting of this
podcast constitutes neither an endorsement of the products offered or
the ideas expressed. The following program is sponsored by New
York Priority Medical Care. Now it's time for the Laws
of Your Money, a weekly call in show with legal
(00:20):
tips to help you protect your money. Here's your host
and Margaret Caroza.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Hello, and welcome to the Laws of your Money. This
is a show dedicated to protecting you from legal and
financial mayhem when it comes to personal finance. I believe
that the single most important thing is protecting ourselves legally,
(00:47):
because what does it matter how diligently I save and
how brilliantly I invest if there is a greater than
forty percent chance of losing assets to a long term
illness and expensive divorce taxes. This could be capital gains taxes,
(01:07):
estate taxes, not to mention ordinary lawsuits. We all know
we're living in a very litigious society, but it comes
as a shock to many people to learn that we
are more likely to be involved in litigation with former
(01:27):
loved ones than with strangers. I think we all have
potential legal land minds in our lives, whether we're in
a second marriage, worried about blended family warfare later, or
we have a special needs loved one or an elderly
relative and we're concerned about them losing their home to
(01:52):
a nursing home if they need long term care. I
am a state planning and asset protection attorney and Margaret
Carosa joined today by my esteemed colleague and co host,
the Reverend Paul Slatcus. Welcome to the program.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Paul Niics Anne, Nice to see you, you too.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
I encourage all of you, if you have a question
about loved ones and finances and legal issues, to join
the conversation by calling one eight hundred three to one
zero sevent ten. Today we're going to talk about the
(02:35):
dues and don'ts of inheritance issues. And I believe we
have a caller, okay, who is joining the program.
Speaker 4 (02:47):
Hello and Margaret.
Speaker 5 (02:48):
Hello, what's your name?
Speaker 4 (02:52):
Hi? My name is Nico.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
How are you Welcome to the program. Nico, what's going
on in your life?
Speaker 4 (03:00):
Well, thank you so much for taking my call. I
just had a question. And while you're on the topic
of inheritance, Unfortunately, my mother, who I love very much,
passed away seven years ago. I'm sorry, it was thank you,
it was. It was a very hard time for the family.
(03:21):
My father wanted to get remarried afterwards.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
As they often do forgive me please continue.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
As they often do. My younger brother and I were
you know, we tried to be very supportive. I was
just starting college at that time, so it was a
transitional time, but we wanted to support my dad. Unfortunately,
my father also passed away recently. I'm sorry, it's okay,
(03:54):
but you know, in his in his uh planning after
you know, he passed away, he always told us before
that if anything happened, my brother and I would get
the house after his new wife, my stepmom passes away.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
But was this okay, Sorry to interrupt, but was this
a house that he bought with your mother?
Speaker 6 (04:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (04:25):
Yeah, So that's why it's emotionally so big for me
and my brother because you know, we grew up in
this house, and you know, the wall decor is still
the painting is that my mother put out. So you know,
it means a lot for me and my brother and
we want, you know, to be able to go into
(04:47):
the house and you know, get our personal effects, and
we respect my father's wishes that he wanted my step
mom to be able to stay in the house. Unfortunately,
she's not letting my brother and I have access to
the house to get our belongings. She's not letting us
go in even you know, it's not just about the belongings.
(05:10):
I want to see the house one more time, and
you know, again with what my dad said, my brother
and I get the house when she passes away. But
until then, is there any way we can I guess
legally make her let us in. You know, I guess
(05:31):
I don't know what to do, and I'm one as
you can help me.
Speaker 2 (05:34):
Oh dear, Okay, So the devil is in the details here,
so you know, hopefully obviously I haven't seen any of
the relevant documents, right, so this is not an uncommon scenario,
unfortunately for people in your position who reasonably want access
(05:59):
to what was their family home, you know, to have
access to their things. So, you know, the worst possible scenario,
and hopefully this is not your case, is that your
father and stepmother did wills that said everything goes to
(06:20):
each other and then upon the death of the survivor,
it would go to you and your brother. That would
be terrible because your stepmother would then be free to
redo the planning because she was the survivor. So hopefully
you don't have that situation. I also hope that your
(06:45):
father did not give your stepmother what's called a life
estate or lifetime ownership rights. And at first glance, this
seems like a good solution, right, So your father says
that this woman can live in the home for the
(07:07):
rest of her life and then upon her death it
goes to you and your brother. That sounds okay, but
the reality is, in that scenario, if your stepmother has
to go to a nursing.
Speaker 5 (07:22):
Home, you are stuck.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
You still can't enter the home because she's technically alive.
And in that scenario, your stepmother would be free to
move to Florida, and then she could rent the house
out and she could pocket all of the rental income.
She could even remarry, and now she and her new
(07:46):
husband are living in your parents' home. You know, those
are the scenarios that people don't really think about in advance,
but we need to. What is hopefully the case is
that your father gave her a right of occupancy until
(08:07):
the earlier of her voluntary departure. Her permanent stay in
a nursing facility or hospital, or obviously her death, at
which point the house reverts to you and your brother, and.
Speaker 5 (08:24):
You need to go further.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
You need to say in the meantime, who is financially
responsible for the property insurance, for property taxes, for paying utilities,
for capital improvements. You know, you could have a situation
where there's a leak in the roof and your stepmother
(08:48):
and her family say, well, we don't really want to
get involved with a big capital expense that's only going
to benefit Nico and his brother down the road. So
you really have to spell all of these things out.
I recommend, Nico that you reach out to your father's
attorney and see if they will share information with you
(09:11):
and if there's anything you know that they would suggest
that you do. And if they don't help you, I well,
let me ask you this question. Did you get along
with her when your father was alive or kind of
sort of you just try to, you know, keep up
(09:33):
appearances on holidays for the sake of your father.
Speaker 6 (09:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (09:39):
I mean, on the one hand, we definitely did try
to stay diplomatic. But there's also the you know, I'm
have to think about my younger brother, and I want
to set an example for him. So it was sort
of like we got along, but it was a little
bit tense. But the other issue is, and I want
to ask you about the she has two kids, my
(10:04):
step siblings, and I'm wondering, if you know, I'm thinking,
what if she dies and the kids her kids, you know,
won't leave. So is that a scenario?
Speaker 5 (10:17):
Oh my goodness, what would I do then?
Speaker 2 (10:20):
This, Paul, this is sounding to me like a law
school final exam question where you have a bunch of
different legal issues in there to sort out. Yeah, that
is not an uncommon scenario.
Speaker 5 (10:38):
When she dies.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
If there are people living in the home, you are
not allowed to engage in what's called self help. You
can't call a locksmith and have the locks changed. If
there are people living in there, even though your father
never gave them explicit permission to live there, they're living there,
(11:05):
and you have like a quasi squatter situation. And now
you would have to go to a landlord tenant attorney
to sort all of that out. And it goes back
to the planning. Your father could have said that her
right of occupancy ends upon her cohabitation with any other
(11:31):
people who is not a paid caregiver. But is there
anyone on the other side. Are you friendly with any
of these step siblings that maybe you could reach out
to one of them and say, look, give us a
break here, we just want to get our things.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
My older stepbrother and I were I think he feels
for our situation, but he's also you know, he'll always
be team mom, so there's not much I can do there.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
Listen, this is what I recommend that you do. Reach
out to me. You know, after the show you can
email me through the website. It's my asset Protection Attorney
dot com. And at the very least, I will work
with you to craft a nice, diplomatic but firm letter
(12:30):
to your stepmother explaining your position and uh, let's see
where we go from there.
Speaker 5 (12:38):
Does that sound first?
Speaker 2 (12:41):
All right, thank you so much for calling Nico, and
please do reach out to me.
Speaker 5 (12:46):
I want to help you.
Speaker 4 (12:49):
Thank you, Thank you so much.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
Stomach ache.
Speaker 2 (12:52):
Yeah, no, this poor kid. He sounds like a nice person.
And yeah, it's a tough situation. And on the other
side of the spectrum, you know, looking at it from
the stepmother's point of view, she may be getting advice
(13:12):
not to let the adult children in the house, because
what if they go back to their childhood bedrooms and
now she can't get them out. So when we have
a blended family situation, it is critically important that, like
(13:33):
a game of chess, that you try to anticipate all
of the future collisions and problems that might occur. You know,
I always say when loved ones and finances collide, the
results can be explosive.
Speaker 5 (13:54):
And you know.
Speaker 2 (13:55):
All of these estate planning and asset protection measures. Is
our last act as a parent, right, what can I
do to protect my children from being involved in difficult
situations later?
Speaker 3 (14:15):
Starting with a will, starting with a little good lawyer
who's smart and has been through this.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
Starting with a will, But I hope we don't end
with a will. Right, We should all have a will,
but the will.
Speaker 5 (14:27):
Goes to where does it go? It goes to probe.
We want to trust.
Speaker 2 (14:34):
We should all have a will, but the goal is
not to have to use it. I believe we have
another caller joining us.
Speaker 6 (14:44):
Hi, my name is My name is Randy. I have
a problem, and I mean I've been listening to your
show for a while and I didn't think i'd ever call.
But here I am calling. My mother passed away in
the past.
Speaker 5 (15:00):
I'm sorry, and.
Speaker 6 (15:02):
She left the house, her house to three ways to
me and my sister and my brother. My sister and
I want to sell it, but my.
Speaker 7 (15:13):
Brother, who by the way, has been living there.
Speaker 6 (15:16):
Since before she passed away, doesn't want to sell it
and he won't even let real estate agents in. So
there anything I can do, Okay.
Speaker 5 (15:27):
So how long has your brother been living in the house.
Speaker 6 (15:31):
Well, now about two years. He's separated from his wife.
I think they're going to get divorced.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
So he started living with your mother when his marriage
was on the rocks.
Speaker 7 (15:47):
Yeah, and he supposedly I helped out taking care of
my mother who was ill towards the end, and although
she did have an aid, but he was sort of
helped me out.
Speaker 5 (15:58):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
And the will or the trust simply says a three
way distribution.
Speaker 5 (16:05):
End of story.
Speaker 6 (16:08):
Yeah, it's just a will a will, Okay.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
So you know the problem there is in the estate
planning in that when we have a child living with us,
and there's a record number have you been hearing this, Paul,
A record number of adult children moving back in with
(16:32):
elderly parents. You know, sometimes it's to help take care
of the parent. But in the cases I see, it's
because the adult children are having financial difficulties and you
know housing, you know what rents are like, and interest
rates are up. People are unable to afford homes and mortgages,
(16:57):
so a lot of people are moving.
Speaker 5 (17:00):
Yeah. No, no, it's insane. So what we need to.
Speaker 2 (17:04):
Do if we have an adult children who has moved
back into the house, we need to revisit the estate
planning to deal with how long do we want this
child to be able to stay. You know, it's unfair
to the child living with us to just ignore the situation.
Speaker 5 (17:26):
Right Do we say they have six.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
Months to continue to reside there to make other arrangements?
Speaker 5 (17:33):
Do they have a year? Do they have two years?
Speaker 2 (17:38):
But absent that, I think you, your sister and brother
should sit down and come up with a reasonable solution.
Have you tried to talk to your brother and does
he tell you when he may leave?
Speaker 7 (17:57):
Well, I've tried, but he he will be.
Speaker 6 (18:02):
Filing for divorce and he says that he doesn't want
to share the protea proceeds of the sale with the
ex wife. Oh boy, And I was under the impression
that when you inherit something. It does it's not part
of the divorce. But I'm not a lawyer.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Okay, Well, Paul, what is your guests as a smart person,
if you inherit something and then you get divorced, does
your soon to be ex spouse have an interest in
the inheritance?
Speaker 3 (18:36):
I might be smart, but I might not know the answer,
But I kind of think that the answer is no.
Speaker 2 (18:44):
So if you are on a game show or in
a law school final exam, the correct answer is that
gifted and inherited assets are separate property, not subject to
equitable distribution. And in real life, a judge in a
(19:10):
matrimonial dissolution can and often will find a way to
give your soon to be expouse some piece of whatever
you might have. And you know, we see this with
lottery winners, or someone is about to get some big bonus,
(19:32):
some year end bonus at work, and they don't want
to receive these assets until after the divorce is finalized.
But I think, you know, it wouldn't take a detective
in your case, Randy, to figure out that the mother
has died and there's a house there, and I think
(19:57):
she's already told her lawyer all about it. So I
don't think your brother is improving his situation at all
by holding up the sale of the house. And you know,
obviously it's costing all of you money with each month
that goes by. Who's paying for the expenses, the property taxes,
(20:20):
the property insurance, the utilities? Is he paying that on
his own?
Speaker 6 (20:26):
Well, so far he's paid for all the costs. Yeah,
all the expenses. But that's just you know, for not
even for a year, you know.
Speaker 2 (20:36):
Yeah, Well, listen, I think the most important thing is
that you all stay amicable, because I have seen this
exact situation and with someone in your brother's situation saying
that he needs to be reimbursed from the ultimate sale
(20:59):
proceeds for property taxes and insurance that he has laid
out from the time of your mother's death.
Speaker 6 (21:06):
Hopefully sure, And I wouldn't have a problem with that,
I don't think. But does it matter I was actually
appointed executor of the will. Does that give me some
sort of power over him or not?
Speaker 5 (21:17):
No?
Speaker 2 (21:18):
No, So executor of the will means you have to
follow the guidelines of the will. You have no ability
to customize it or to shape it. But having a
will is in your brother's favor because he has an
(21:38):
eight month delay before you're even able to get to
a closing table. Right, so you are the executor in
all likelihood will hire an attorney and you will go
to surrogates court in the county in which you live,
and you can expect.
Speaker 5 (21:58):
An eight month process.
Speaker 2 (22:02):
So you know, again, I think it's worthwhile for you,
your sister and brother to sit down tell him he's
not gaining anything in his upcoming divorce by refusing to
sell the home. Now, if you want to come into
my office, reach out to me after the show, and
(22:24):
you can email me through my asset Protection Attorney dot com.
Speaker 5 (22:31):
Good luck with it, Randy.
Speaker 6 (22:33):
Thank you so much. I appreciate it.
Speaker 5 (22:36):
Take care.
Speaker 3 (22:36):
Another complicated scenario.
Speaker 2 (22:38):
Yeah, no, these scenarios come up every week. I get
calls like this in my office, and you know, there's
hardly a day that goes by where these issues are
not in the newspaper. Right, I think we should start
having a segment, you know, and in the news. Did
(23:01):
you read this week about former Governor David Patterson?
Speaker 3 (23:06):
I heard something, but I didn't hear that. Remember the details.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
So former Governor David Patterson, who I have had the
pleasure to meet when I was a legislator, nicest guy
in the world. He brought suit this past week against
his brother Daniel, who he is alleging helped himself to
(23:31):
his deceased mother's entire estate before she died. So, Missus
Patterson died in the summer of twenty twenty four. She
left a will saying everything even Stephen between her two
sons David and Daniel, and lo and behold there are
(23:55):
no assets left in the estate or minim assets. Daniel
was the executor and apparently filed a probate petition alleging
that the estate assets were less than thirty thousand dollars
when there was an estate of seven million before Missus
(24:19):
Patterson died. So the question is and David Patterson issuing
his brother for the value of three point five million
what he estimates his half of the estate should have been.
Speaker 5 (24:33):
So this case, if.
Speaker 2 (24:35):
It doesn't settle, is going to be a nightmare because
it's hard to prove when we're dealing with a deceased person.
Did she want to give Daniel her entire estate? Now,
obviously that would have been her choice. If she decided
(24:59):
that she did not want to leave the estate equally
for whatever reason, maybe one child was helping her and
the other child wasn't, Or did Daniel take the money
without missus Patterson knowing about it, Or if he was
(25:19):
her appointed executor under the will, maybe he was also
her appointed agent under a power of attorney and that
would have allowed him. Depending upon the scope of the
power of attorney, that could have enabled him to go
to the broker, go around town to the various banks.
(25:42):
There would have to be several different banking institutions involved
given the amount of the estate, so that everything would
be covered by FDIC insurance. You know, did he exceed
his authority given to him by the mother and helped
(26:03):
himself to the estate assets. In any event, you can
imagine that this is a scenario that will do irreparable
harm to family relationships.
Speaker 3 (26:17):
Sure, you know you said the thing you started. You
start the show by saying forty percent of potential lawsuits
are going to come from family related scenarios.
Speaker 2 (26:28):
Yeah, the overwhelming majority of lawsuits will be with someone
that we have shared Thanksgiving dinner.
Speaker 5 (26:37):
Or a pillow with.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
Right, we become fierce litigants in battle, So we'll continue
to monitor the Patterson estate situation.
Speaker 3 (26:50):
Do you think the mindset iste this will never happen
to me?
Speaker 5 (26:53):
Of course, of course.
Speaker 2 (26:55):
And I think as a parent, we want to hope
for the best, and you know, we want to think.
Speaker 5 (27:00):
That our children will honor our memory.
Speaker 2 (27:05):
By being amicable and civil and amiable.
Speaker 5 (27:10):
With each other.
Speaker 2 (27:11):
But other people become involved. Once spouses enter the mix,
everything is on its head. And again, we want to
avoid probate. We can better customize all of these issues
when we're dealing with a trust you in again Randy's situation,
(27:33):
the brother who is staying in the house trying to
frustrate a quick sale of the house is benefiting by
the fact that they are involved in a lengthy probate.
And when I say eight months, that is if there
are no problems. Eight months is the absolute minimum. When
(27:55):
we have estranged relatives or relatives with developmental disability psychiatric diagnosis,
the probate can be much longer. Now I have a
client who passed away, and it turned out that when
he was in college, he was a sperm donor and
(28:20):
he and his friends would do this to help with
living expenses and lo and behold in this age of
twenty three and meters in ancestry dot com. It turned
out that he had two children out there that surfaced.
Speaker 5 (28:39):
And you know, this is.
Speaker 2 (28:42):
A situation where he should not have relied on a will.
He should have had a trust because the trust avoids
probate and we don't have to notify all of these people.
So you, Paul, are free to disinherit anyone you wish,
but your airs at law are required to be notified
(29:06):
in a probate situation.
Speaker 5 (29:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (29:09):
I'm exhausted, and just like.
Speaker 5 (29:11):
That, we are out of time.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
Please reach out to me during the week at my
lawyer ann on Instagram and my asset Protection Attorney dot com.
Hope you will join us next Sunday ten thirty am
here on WOR seven ten am. Have a great day everyone.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
The preceding program was sponsored by New York Priority Medical Care.
The preceding was a paid podcast. iHeartRadio's hosting of this
podcast constitutes neither an endorsement of the products offered or
the ideas expressed.
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