Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
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Speaker 2 (00:09):
Welcome to the Man in the Arena, where bold conversations,
real challenges, and unstoppable determination takes setter stage. This is
the show that brings you unfiltered insights from leaders, visionaries,
and everyday warriors who refuse to sit on the sidelines.
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(00:30):
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man who points out how the strong man stumbles. The
credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.
(00:51):
What inspired Arthur Lee protecting his daughter and then the
world's success Leaves Clues will explore each chapter of author's book,
Sorry Can't is a Lie, and hear from other men
and women in their arenas. Get ready to be inspired.
Welcome to the Man in the arena. I'm Rick Thatcher
with the CEO, inventor of Life BacT Arthur Lee Arthur.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
So many things go through my head. But today we're
talking about the games to count, right, and what does
that mean? It's the unrealized reason we play sports, right.
But I was thinking right when we were coming up,
it's a bigger picture, right, You and I and Jim,
who will be our guests, have kind of this odd responsibility.
(01:38):
We're the last generation of pre information right with the
last ones, so we have a different perspective on things now.
I'm not the guy you know we walk up the
hill in the snow both ways when I was a kid.
It is what it is. There's pros and there's cons, right,
But if you look at what's going on going on, right,
(02:00):
we have all this information and technology and making things easier.
And I was thinking, you know, you're online to get
coffee and the guy in front of he has his
card and a chip and it don't work and you're
there for ten minutes. We used to hand the guy
money and leave.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Right.
Speaker 3 (02:15):
You go in to elevator, there's no buttons because you
have to hit it on the outside. So all these
things that made it simpler, also make it maybe more complicated,
right folks like us, right so and anyone. But the
point is we have to be conscious that these advances
aren't necessarily better. And when we talk about the games
(02:36):
to count, you know, my daughter was in uh well,
she played soccer, mass speaker sock club, just like we did,
just like Jim did. And it turned into this system
of coaches and trainers, and you know that it got extreme.
We weren't allowed to have a team name, and we
didn't have practices. They all went to one practice and
(02:57):
in my head, it wasn't better, it was worse, and
it was destroying the real purpose of early sports. And
now my daughter goes and gymnastics. It's like twenty four
hours a day every day. Right, I remember running from
soccer practice. It's a baseball practice played both. Now this
(03:18):
is your sport and you've got to commit it like
ten years old and now it's your life. It's not
supposed to be that way.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Well, as you point out, you mentioned different youth sports
that you know, we grew up with and kids grew
up with. Now everything has changed. Every sport has changed,
both in how we find out about it, how we
share information about how we found feedback, but also at
the root of it, there's money being made, and I
think that that is one aspect of it changing things.
(03:48):
So we'll continue and our children will continue to get
life lessons from the engagement in these sports. Some of
its sportsmanship, some of its ethics, some of it's you know, bigger,
pick your stuff. But clearly it's been changed from the
innocent times that we grew up in when it was
just about the game.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Well. What I noticed, though, too, is the quicker depletion
of the number of kids playing. When you have a
system that says, you know, we're going to bring in
professional coaches make you better, and then you say the
best players, well, the best players are going to get
more attention. Then we're going to create a special league
for the best players. Well then the kids that's not
that good, they ain't going.
Speaker 2 (04:27):
Right, You're not about development anymore.
Speaker 3 (04:29):
Those to back up to the title, right, our show
is we take a topic and we retrospectively look at
and a lot of it's from my book, but we
can use other topics. But I think in this world
of TikTok and the news being this and that boom
boom boom, boom boom. Slow it down, pay attention. Let's
(04:51):
look at the deeper aspect and the humanity. Right when
you watch the news, it's all these, you know, terrible things,
but it's there's not the connection to what really matters. Right.
So in the book The Games Do Count by Brian Kilme,
our friend, great book, people should get it. He doesn't
(05:13):
look at the superstar athlete per se. He looks about
the successful person and what their lack of athletic ability.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
Right. In some cases they were successful athletes, but they
all took lessons away. And there's sixty some odd you know.
Burt Reynolds, Gerald Ford, George Bush, Oliver North, James Brown broadcaster.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
Well, how about the one from his show that he
talks about Robin Williams. Right, right, so you know you
think of Robin Williams really deep dude and a very
good human.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Not necessarily an athlete.
Speaker 3 (05:50):
Right, but that was the key And what's the thing
He says, he was the third midfield.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
And guard tackle. We only played two midfield We only
played with two midfielders.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
Okay, say that though, right?
Speaker 2 (06:00):
Well he I think he said I was the fourth midfielder,
and you know, the only problem is our coach played
with you know, our team played with three midfielders. So
that's almost like the old ND guard tackle for the
football position. Will I sit at the end of the bench,
I guard the water bottle, and if anybody comes near
it and it's not authorized, I tackle him.
Speaker 3 (06:20):
Position.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Yeah, yeah, that's why I didn't play football. Stuck with soccer.
But you know what what strikes me in all of
the conversations that we've had with Brian Killmead about you know,
his book which we should you know, relay and tie
in which we will when we talked to Jim Killmead
the tie into the chapter of your book, and we
mentioned the website. So for those folks and when we
(06:43):
talk about a topic, make sure you pick up Sorry
Can't is a Lie by Arthur Lee. Today we're talking
about the chapter that's the same title as Brian's book,
The Games Do Count, And that's what we're going to
be talking about today.
Speaker 3 (06:55):
The book is these moments that have the deep meaning.
And you know, faith in old age are an interesting thing.
You have to have faith long enough for it to
pay off, right, and you have to get old enough
to realize that that happens. But so the challenge we
face with kind of educating our kids or trying to
(07:16):
share life experiences, you know, you have to get them
to believe in this mythical outcome of dedication commitment. And
they say, you know, but when you're older, you approved it.
So if you didn't, you're going to have issues that
you should have and if you do, you're going to
get the reward and understand. So we have to transition
(07:39):
generation from you know, we used to watch black and
white TV, and we used to drive a car and
my dad watched the radio and black of white TV
and drove a car. Now we TikTok and the car
drives itself. It's a new world. So we have a
responsibility to try and view that and share these things.
So let's go back Robin Williams, right, and Brian you know,
(08:01):
interviews him as he did George Bush and Jerald Ford
and all these guys, and it was the connection to
the sport that became part of their persona, which is
what is necessary to be quote unquote successful. Right.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
The life lessons right.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
Yeah, and what are they? Right? And like you said,
when Jim comes on, we will talk more, but you were
you played talker? I played talker, but that was our game.
I played everything, but I wasn't particularly good at anything.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
But that's according to you. People disagree that it was
a very tough town that you played in.
Speaker 3 (08:37):
No, it was, and that was awesome. But for this
we're still friends. Marian and I are still friends. I
am still friends with a lot of my soccer buddies
and my basketball buddies, and there was a bond. But
if you look at the difference, right, my dad coached
our basketball team, Jim coached our soccer team. He was
two years older than us. So it wasn't a paid
(09:01):
dude who came down because it was his job.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
And then he left, right, there was an investment.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
Do you remember something? Did you play little league? That
was an interesting group of dad coaches baseball. Yeah, it
seemed to be a little more relaxed dais ago in the.
Speaker 2 (09:17):
Well base pastime. So it goes along with the general
feel about baseball. Let's play two.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
I never ever forget. We had a game called on
account of bugs because we were playing to Anchor Park
and there was too many Nats and all, and he
just we were all like out with this game, right,
and I also remember I had a coach that would
wrap up practice because he wanted to get home to
watch his TV show, right, and even tell us, you know,
we we got to wrap up. I got ellery queen
(09:43):
at seven.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
Oh my goodness, gracious, let's watch television back then.
Speaker 3 (09:48):
But the reality was it was almost more appropriate to say,
it's not that big a deal. I don't care, you know,
just have fun, right, right, right, mister Watson, right, you go,
what you did it? Practice? Scrimmage, Go scrimmage, scrimmage. I
love scrimmage, hated drills, right, I wasn't very good on him, right, scrimmage.
Speaker 2 (10:07):
It was no by the way, absolutely right. Besides maybe
trying juggling, there was no technical dreamer. It was all
functional and that's the way they played. Mister Watson references
we both had him as a coach and intramurals Scottish
and it was what we call direct soccer. Kick it
in that direction and everybody, including uh you know, maybe
(10:31):
the goalkeeper at times, get involved and go direct. There
was no tactical trapping, controlling heading, but you know, all
the things.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
Abound it that that was what made it fun and
also why everyone could play, right, some of the You
know that we all have different ability, right, and that's
beautiful and that's life. But the kid that wasn't very good,
you know, and he had dribbled cones and do all
the stuff. You know, he looks like an e in
front of everyone, and he don't want to do it anymore.
(11:00):
We just played and you know, you tried to use
the Crummey kid as bad as you could in your
mix of the team. But he was on your team.
He was your friend. But there was this increased seriousness
of the game. Is deteriorating the games do count? Right?
Speaker 2 (11:19):
I was going to think before to ask about the
difference in these lessons that you learned and having faith,
did it make it easier for you once you got
it to then coach your daughter because you've seen it
and you've learned it, and maybe she could benefit from.
Speaker 3 (11:34):
One of the last generations of a dad coach. Now, yes,
look they still coach, but it it tends to be
much more serious in their game. When I coached volleyball,
I used to have them at the end of practice
they would have to try and bump the ball into
the hoop, the basketball.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
Hoop and little cross functional training. They would call that.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
But and I would put a stuffed animal on a
stick over the net and if you hit him, you know.
And I actually used to give away like funky sunglasses.
I made a game, but he made it fun right, right,
And then when we scrimmaged, I would play right. I
was with him right soccer too. I used to love
(12:14):
that because I was way better than the three year
olds and stuff. But yeah, but they're horrible. It's advantage
knocked them all like doesn't. But the point was it
made it fun, you know, I had I used stuffed
animals for goalkeepers because some reason, when you're little, you
kick it right to the guy in the middle.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Yeah, you said it earlier in the conversation. You know,
one of my goals you want. I wanted my whole
team to want to come to the next practice. I
want to come to the next game, and that's where
we start. And I think some parents thought, because of
my involvement in soccer, I was taking it too serious. Heck, no,
nothing further In the truth. I wanted, you know, my
(12:52):
kids certainly, but also the entire team, regardless of skill level,
regardless of their initial excitement about the sport, to want
to come back, and it sounds like I did exactly
very much the same thing.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Well, I mean in my boyble, because we had so
much fun. They my practice were packed. Every kid came
in to practice, you know. And it wasn't because they were,
you know, wanted to become world class volleyball players. It
was because we had a lot of fun. And that
was just you know, that was the way it is.
But now we're taking that back to our reminiscing to
(13:29):
the book Why Do the Games Count?
Speaker 2 (13:31):
Right, you're listening to the man in arena. I'm Rick Thatcher,
and I apologized for cutting off mister Arthur, Lady's CEO,
but I was thinking about the games do Count? It
reminded me of the classroom setting when students would in
high school ask the teacher does spelling count?
Speaker 3 (13:48):
And the frustration Adam Tyler.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Madame Tyler, does spelling count? And it had to be
the frustration if I what difference does it make if
I tell you like the games the spell do your best?
Speaker 3 (14:01):
I did it. I wrote a paper once in English
and I got an A plus over f I kind
of I kept that forever because she's like, I love
what you wrote. But you cannot spell you on sentences,
you have grandma. But I was like, I was proud
of that because if you had to pick which one
you got the A plus and which one you got
(14:22):
the flus and content, I'll figure out.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
Spelling you could fix and if we had it in
today's technology would have been done well.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
I was always counting on someone else fixing my spelling
and my grandma and I wrote on sentences much like
my book. But that's the point, right, It's not the
coach and the team and the touches and the thing.
It's that's the get an f The A plus is
you made friends, You were part of a team. You
(14:52):
picked up a guy that fell, You were picked up
by a guy that fell. You had a role, You
had a responsibility in that team of your role, regardless
of what it is. Robin Williams, he was the spirit.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
And the excitement of these individuals. You mentioned Robin Williams
in particular when Brian tells us privately the stories of
how they connect. Yeah, he had a return phone call.
He got a message from Roman Wims said yeah, I'll
call you later, right yeah, right, yeah, okay in what lifetime?
And he did call him later because why he knew
he was going to talk about what's this about sports?
(15:28):
And I wanted to tell that soccer story and there's
passion that never went away, right and the great stories.
But we're going to talk more about the Games Due Count,
a chapter of Arthur's book, Sorry Can't is a Lie,
So go to life fact dot net and get that book.
It's also the title of the book that we're also
talking about, The Games Due Count by Brian kill Mead,
and we'll talk to his brother Jim kill Mead after
(15:50):
this break.
Speaker 4 (15:50):
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Speaker 1 (17:46):
Now on iHeartRadio more of the Man in the Arena
the Life Back Radio Show.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Here again are Arthur Lee and Rick Thatcher. Go to
lifeback dot net if for no other reason than protect
yourself and your family with a life. But also again,
sorry can't is a lie? So you can join along
with the discussion the at home version sorry can't is
a lie. But we're talking about the chapter The Games
Do Count, all about youth sports, the life lessons that
(18:13):
can be both good and bad, that could be taken,
and some of the high profile individuals in the book,
about sixty of them, politicians, broadcasters, actors, actresses, all who
really enjoyed going back and recanting their stories about what
they learned.
Speaker 3 (18:30):
The little piece of their life that was in sports.
Whether they were good they weren't good, didn't matter. It
was what it did for their character that they attribute
to their success. And we are fortune enough to have
my former coach someone I looked up to and shape me.
Jim kill me.
Speaker 6 (18:49):
Great to be with you guys.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
So I was starting to tell you when they actually
said we should go back on the air, this story.
So this morning I saw it as a post and
it said, one of the greatest sounds I've ever heard
is when someone calls me coach. And I immediately thought
to you, because like I was, I don't know where
I was recently, and I heard a little kid say dad,
(19:13):
and I turned and that was the sweetest album in
the world, Dad, Dad, And then I've also had the
joy of coach. And they're right, and there's a reason
for that, because those are sweet sounds. You know, your
child calling your dad, or your players calling your coach.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
Did Jackie call you?
Speaker 3 (19:35):
He's called me coach when I coached there, right, But
that just that voice, yes it was. It wasn't for me, yes,
but you know you hear dad, you turn right? So
I thought to you, the today coach.
Speaker 6 (19:46):
And you know what, we came together and expected to
be a coach at seventeen. Never thought about it, but
you know, all these years later you look back at
it and if you follow a ready John Wooden, which
I think pretty much everybody on this call about John Wooden,
that was one of his lives. You know, he's an
English teacher that became a coach and when he was
(20:07):
college coach in the history of sports, and that was
what he said. It was one of the most satisfying
things to be called the coach was an honor, Yeah,
and I knew it was then, but I was trying
to still figure out in real time. At the same time,
it was quite a responsibility. But I look back now
and sometimes jealous of my wife, who's been a teacher
for twenty seven years because she gets to have the
(20:29):
satisfaction of working with kids every day as a profession.
And I look back and all the great things that
have happened to me in my professional life, and the
challenges and some of the hot my highlights go back
to coaching that mass peak of Celtic team in the
seventies and the teams that have coached since that, my
(20:49):
own kids, and a lot of people in between. He
had to resonate. I keep those notes more than I
keep any other notes.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
I get in the realm of the games to count right,
which is all about out the character building and accessorial
benefits of sport. Right. Do you feel that you got
more from coaching or playing?
Speaker 6 (21:09):
I think it's pretty close. It's very close, But I
think I got two different things. The life experience that
those younger years of playing, none of us knew how
that was shaping us. So I don't know what percentage
that would be. But it not only created a network
of peers and friends that are sometimes lifetime friends, that
(21:30):
go past everything and crossover every socio academic border. But
the coaching thing is something different. Coaching it makes you challenge,
just like being a parent or dad or mom. You
really have to think about what you stand for when
you're looking at twenty young men or women and you
see things that are resonating or not resonating in their eyes,
and so I think they affect me, probably equally, but
(21:52):
in two different ways.
Speaker 3 (21:53):
Well think about it too. Now I think more than ever,
this topic of the games to count is important, right
because we have become much more results orientated in sports,
not the real reason that you know, we play is
to build these characters and have fun. But on the
flip side of because I coached a little and I played,
(22:16):
and I played for you and you were good at it.
But when you coach and my dad was good this
he would try and get the best out of what
the player was, meaning it didn't matter how good he was,
it mattered about what you could help him achieve in
his capabilities, how you could fit him in the team
(22:36):
to make it useful for the team, and how to
reach him to inspire and make him enjoy the game
and do better. Right the round peg, round hole, Do
this drill? Do this drill? Well maybe in that good
at drills who gets to me that was You know
why I still look up to you and appreciate you
(22:57):
because you saw this, you know, mentally disturbed player and
help them keep self identify by the way.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
Self diagnosed at a very young age.
Speaker 6 (23:08):
But I'm the coach that actually identified him as somebody
I wanted to be on the team. And I was
one hundred percent right. Even from that day, at already
being a teenager, I could see that he had an
incredible desire to succeed and to be a good teammate.
And that's not common, Uh. I see a lot of
There's a lot of talent, and there's a lot of
people that are and sometimes very much all about themselves.
(23:31):
And I think in a very short period of time,
I saw already as someone man. If I'm a good coach,
if I'm a halfway decent coach, shame on me. If
I can't help make this guy maximize his ability. That's
the way you can just put him in a position
so he if he walked away from the game three
years from now, that he'll say, you know what, I
gave everything I had. I think I maximized my ability
because the worst feeling in life is that you didn't
(23:52):
maximize your ability. And and we on the field, right, yeah,
that'd be right, and we don't maximize our ability. We
all know it. It's personal and that was the goal.
But like your dad said, in that of talent level,
where do you start? Where do you finish?
Speaker 3 (24:08):
Well? The I think the one of the in the
games to can Arena is to me, the joy of
sports was the simplicity, meaning you went out and you
just gave it well everything you had, left it all
on the field. It was beautiful in that you could
just go give it everything you had and you did
(24:28):
and you're done when lose didn't matter. And when I
take back you know that to their life. When I
have a challenge, I just give it everything I got.
If I fail, I fail, right, But it's another piece
of the game, meaning the paid coach may not be
trying to develop this kid differently than that kid, right.
(24:51):
And the parents they're the kids. They want to see
them grow inside outside, right. And the joy of it
was it's life in a microcosm. Go out, do your best,
you may win, you may lose, you walk off. And
you say, I gave it everything I had and that
was fun And I'm good, right, because I think that
(25:14):
the lesson of that is if you want to succeed.
And from the book, it's people that we're not good
players necessarily you know, they were not the best.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
It didn't matter because the percentages dictate and hold true
that there are very few people that are going to
go on even past college. So what are you doing
to make everybody's experience a positive one and give the
good life lessons? And I was just struck with as
you describe. And I've talked to you before about mentors
and people that you know, examples that you could look to.
(25:45):
You put a coach Jim Kilmead along, and you were
fortunate to have Uncle Roger, your dad, your mom, a
support system, family, some people you know. Fortunately it's just
that they're a coach. Yeah, they don't have it.
Speaker 3 (26:00):
And if we don't acknowledge and and I think we know,
we certainly talk about Jim, what Jim's up to now,
and sure those lessons are creating something incredible and understanding
the neat but the show, the thought, the takeaway is
understand that that's what the real importance of early sports,
(26:21):
the teamwork, the friendships, the dedication, the commitment and your management.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
In my case, you know all of those lessons some
some came later. But how to behave how to treat
your teammates. You know, it's like playing Cowboys and Indians,
but with structure and how to talk and respect the regree.
But Jim, I wanted to ask you before we talk
about the American Soccer Club of New York, which is
so great, so exciting to talk about. I wanted to
(26:47):
ask you, because you know, the author of not only
Sorry Can's Life but also The Games Do Count, by
your brother, Brian Killmate, if you could think back, because
I would. I enjoyed doing this thinking back to when
the process of Brian writing that book, because it's one
of them. I think it was his first. It was
which profile stood out to you the most or what
story from the preparing, Like Brian preparing this book, it
(27:09):
stuck out the most.
Speaker 6 (27:10):
It's funny because Brian's written a whole bunch of books
now and one is the next one is better than
the next one. They're phenomenal history books. But when he
I think it was on a weekend and he mentioned
that he had an idea. We were just talking. He's like,
you know, I have an idea about writing a book.
And the thought of writing a book was like a
you kid made that it's easier to run a marathon
for twenty six miles to think about it, you'll write
(27:31):
a book where which did Yeah, exactly right. And it
resonates to me and goes, so, what's your idea? And
he told me the idea everybody had a story, and
so it resonated me because I'm taking to write a
story about all these people that didn't make it, but
they did have life changing experience. And sometimes you hear
a concept from somebody for business or an idea for
a book, and you're like, I don't get it. And
(27:54):
it hit me in a second and a hand that
that is such a great idea because we all have
a story. All three of us have a story. Well
you know, and the people were going to see today
have a story that we don't even know, and then
already took it and put into his book. Both books
I read on a flight too. By the way, Brian's
was a longer flight than this flight I have.
Speaker 3 (28:14):
Next door to read my book.
Speaker 6 (28:15):
Yeah, exactly, Yeah, it was Buffalo, perfect.
Speaker 3 (28:24):
Flight.
Speaker 6 (28:25):
It's relatable, not even about the length of it. Brian's
book had essays already had a lot of things to
talk about, including his own life, and it resonates with
normal people, if there is such a thing anymore. And
right away, I think I don't know if if any
one of them stood out. Rick, to answer your question,
I think the fact that when Robin Williams called Brian's houses,
(28:47):
I mean, that's just this is Rob Williams maybe the
most at that point in time, most prolific actor comedian ever,
and at that time he was in his prime, and
he's called a house because he's going to talk for
ten fifteen minutes about playing sports and how it kind
of saved him because he was an only child and
had his story and you would never think about that,
(29:08):
but it just goes to everything that we're talking about
here right now.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
Jim, that was my that was my example. I don't know,
you know, before you joined us. You know what's crazy
today I was.
Speaker 3 (29:16):
Thinking about as Jim was speaking. So Jim coached me
and Brian, you could say we did okay, we took
on like Brian is the word of reason and you
know we're saving thousands of lives. We had the same coach.
You want to back it out to the games to count.
I'm hoping that someone listening is going I have a
bigger responsibility than I thought when I coach, and as
(29:40):
your kid, you ski, I have a bigger responsibility than
not showing up that It's that we need to reach
that kid. My dad was great that he was when
he passed away kids from his PBC basketball teams saying
how they he influenced them. You know, and I say
it about Jim all the time, but this conversation needs
(30:03):
to be every coach, every player in the world needs
to know. It's about the outcome of your plan. Yeah
and have and when you're a coach, it's not about
who's the quick at Yes, that's important, but you got
to notice that Scott is not joining him right and
he is slower. But that way we can use him
(30:25):
as the shooting dummy.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
Now that's not right, Well, he's celebrity listening to Arthur Lee.
I'm Rick Thatcher and we're joined by Jim Killmead. Big
project coming up that we want to talk about is
the American Soccer Club of New York launching this month,
great announcements, and we want to talk about the coach,
certainly because I know it was hard probably for you
to not be the coach. But you have a lot
(30:51):
going on, Jef. He does, So, how exciting is this
new project?
Speaker 6 (30:55):
Well, you know what, I'm sure anybody's ever started anything
a business team, Exciting is definitely part of it. But
if you're starting anything from scratch, which when you look back,
is the single the best things you've ever done in
your life, at least for me, during it, you don't
appreciate anywhere near as much as you do later. So
we're in that process of digging the hole, you know,
(31:16):
and we're using shovels, we're not using big equipment, and
ultimately it's one relationship at a time, from corporate partners
to kids and families, and so we're in that mode
right now with almost a thirty three day window. Now
it's the opening day, so it's a great time. We
are a small club with big plants. And I say
that all the time, and I meet it, and we're
(31:39):
building it one relationship at a time. We're not writing
million dollar checks and buying the media time. We're literally
we're earning every fan we have, every partner we have,
And I think we've got a really good core group
of local investors. I call a band of brothers, self
made guys and soon to be sisters hopefully band of
sisters as well, that have come up and and and
(32:00):
all had one common bond, had some kind of an
experience in this in our sport, and that that's that's
very gratifying. My partner Kevin Reard and another guy from
Long Island Hicksfield soccer player, boredhom guy, uh, real good
financial guy too. All very humble people, uh, with a
lot of pride. And we got a great coach and
John Fitzgerald another guy, not a Hicksville guy and know
(32:22):
what's going on with Hicksville, but prolific coach used to
be yeah, college coach as well as been he's coaches
coaches and been around for a long time. And John
and I go back to having no kids and uh,
no families and coaching in our twenties against each other
for our former club Messapequa, and we've got a good
group of people.
Speaker 3 (32:42):
Talk a little bit about the team and the league.
Speaker 6 (32:46):
We're gonna be playing our first game in our inaugural season,
our first game ever, May fourth, Sunday night, seven pm
at Hopshire University's Captain's Field. It's the top Soccerspacific venue
in the New York metro Long Island area. Uh and
it's my alma made, so it's it's great to go
back as a guy that played there for four years
and to come back with a professional team, and to
(33:07):
be at my own field. It's actually quite a better
complex than when I was there. But that's that's a
sort of surprise as well. Listen, guys, our team is
all local players. And the players that aren't local, that
weren't born here have been living here for you know,
a decade or two, came here as kids from other countries.
But we're ninety five percent born and bred here. Kids
(33:27):
from North Fork, kids from Stony Brook, kids from New
Hyde Park, and a lot of local college players. That's
what we are. To be a very young team with
a couple of very experienced players, and those players. You know,
we think at one point we'll start to become household
names here. So we've we've signed players. We've got some
super experienced players like Jorge and Albert Alberto and Niedo.
(33:48):
These guys are two of our farm players. They're they're
twin brothers. Played in Ecuador. It's like Aiden Colby and
from from Northport the Harbor Soccer Club playing for Brook University.
So this is the chance for them all to play
in part of their hometowns. We have Sean Fitzgerald from
Binghamton and Brian Sara Mago from from Loyola University Graduate
(34:12):
Red Bulls Academy. Played in Portugal, but you know he's
a local guy.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
Players to watch. Just like New York, it's a melting pot.
We're diverse, we're inclusive, and we're going to celebrate this
tomorrow live for a launch party. But then May fourth,
first game you're listening to Jim Kilnea to Arthur Lee.
I'm Rick Thatcher and we'll be back with more the
man in the arena after this break.
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Speaker 1 (36:05):
Now on iHeartRadio, more of the Man in the Arena,
the Life Back Radio Show.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
Here again are Arthur Lee and Rick Thatcher talking with
Jim Killmead, who's part of this very exciting local sports
story these coach and I think, yeah, Coach kill Mead
is gonna I think he's going to share the story
of the name. Because all of this is we've been
let in on some of the announcements, the reveals. There's
(36:31):
going to be I think a very interesting uniform revealed tomorrow.
But Jim, can you tell us about the name? I
got on first question.
Speaker 3 (36:37):
I wanted to talk to Jim. You know, when you
were discussing the local talent that the Bob Appadaca Roy
White story came to me. And I think that the youth,
the kids that are into soccer, and even if they're not,
and you know that maybe we can get him into it.
But the accessibility to see these guys that grew up
(36:59):
in their namehoods go on and play at that level. Right.
And two, you know when I was ten and I
met Bob Appadaca, the relief picture for the Mets, it
was like I met the greatest guy in the world.
But it's inspiring. And I think that our job that
support Jim and is to let people know, come down,
(37:22):
meet these guys, see him playing, Let your kids see.
I remember going to see Pele at Randall's Island. What
I was thinking was when you were talking about the
local talent, right, and I remember our Bob Appadac of
Roy White discussion. Oh yeah, So the to me that
was a big moment, right. He wasn't a Hall of Fame,
(37:44):
He was a good picture, but I was so excited, right,
And Jim had a similar experience with Roy White. But
for this part and why you got to come out
to Hofstrom, bring your kids, bring your little kid team,
bring the team, you know, go as a team seeing
Pele and rand Loose Island. This is inspiration. Yes, right, Jim.
Speaker 6 (38:06):
I think the connectivity already with you and Bob Abadaka
and myself at Roy White is that got a chance
to meet them. They're accessible back in the day. And
and that's not the way it is anymore with Major
League anything, baseball, soccer. Uh. That's that's the beauty and
the real core value of what we are because we're
entire our entire existence is based on our community involvement.
(38:27):
We're doing big appearances this weekend, uh for the Loyland
Junior Soccer League in the HBC Soccer Park for their
developmental days. And there's Peter Collins Soccer Park in plain View.
Our players live here, They're going to live here, definitely,
and they're part of the community. They've grown up in
the clubs. They understand the dynamic, the competitive nature of
where we all live and and I think their goal
(38:50):
now is to come together as a team, which Jon
Fancherald will work hard on and pull these guys together
so they can actually represent Long Island Metro New York
the way you the three of us understand it very competitive.
Speaker 3 (39:03):
But I think that you know, if we are the
circle back and the back of our heads and all,
and the games do count, right, so we know the
real importance of the sport. And then we tied it
into you know, kind of dilution of the you know,
trainer and this and that, and we get young people
to come out and watch and say that kid grew
up in brent would look at him play right, And
(39:26):
I've seen two and I know you'll do it. Is
the camaraderie and teamwork and their bond right, showing off that,
like you said, making them accessible, right, saying you know, hey,
we we're a team. Man. This is great and letting
them see that, you know, up close. And I really
think there's a godwin to me and you and Brian
and Rick they would all play talking together that are
(39:49):
now trying to support you, save lives with life. I
can support the team to bring that atmosphere back.
Speaker 6 (39:56):
That's great. And you mentioned kids from Brentwood. We've got
three from Brentwood, style On Acosta, Kenny Cordova, and these
communities are tight, and these guys get a chance now.
It's also for them too. They get a chance to
show that they've dedicated the whole life to this whole thing.
And me, a lot of players get missed too. If
we're talking about now that five percent of players of
the ninety of the one hundred percent of all of us,
(40:17):
it couldn't make it into the pro ranks or whatever.
This is a chance for these guys too, and part
of our the American South Club New York's and our
website is ASC New York dot com, is to not
only to showcase the best of the metro Low Island area,
but to launch some of these players into European careers.
Not everybody will be able to do it, but we
(40:38):
know there are players here. In a market of almost
four or five six million people counting the city, we
know that there are players here. Right now, we have
one player from Long Island that is playing in Europe.
His name is Joe Scalley. He's from Lake Grove. He's
playing from munchin Glaubloch and Bundesliga. He got a chance
to play and a fully funded academy for no but
(41:01):
he had to go into the city and if he
didn't have a family that can take days off five
days a week, he wouldn't have made it. So we're
looking to put that academy and developed this academy after
this year for the for the top players, regardless of
where you come from or how much money you have,
or your background or your family support that we're going
to underwrite the careers of an academy full of youth
(41:21):
players and that will start after we launched our first
season this year with the men's American Soccer Club New
York team.
Speaker 3 (41:27):
Do you know, do you know if there's any openings
for a sixty year old goalie and a sixty year
old you know, akey fullback for a friend. Well, here's
what I think.
Speaker 2 (41:41):
I think I may rear my ugly goalkeeper head large
head and maybe one of the contests.
Speaker 6 (41:47):
Yes, yes, well, here's what I'm saying. You just nailed it,
and almost if they can change the substitution rules, here's
what I would do, And I would talk to John
make sure John Fitzgerald, the head coach, buys in on this.
If there was a corner kick opportunity in the final
five minutes of the half of the game, I'd want
to throw already on there just for one heading opportunity.
Speaker 3 (42:06):
Oh my god, I just gotta hill and I want.
Speaker 6 (42:09):
And if we had a penalty gig against us, I'd
want to throw a ricking goal because rick, we'll get
inside the shooter's head.
Speaker 2 (42:15):
I'll get in there. I'll live in there.
Speaker 3 (42:18):
Hey, one are the halftime shows. We cant have old timers, uh,
contest where I get to try to head, we get
to shoot on Rick itself.
Speaker 6 (42:28):
Yeah, talk about the halftime show that we're putting together.
Speaker 3 (42:31):
You know, well, why do you see it's gonna be fun.
You know you got to come on more, you know,
periodically all the time, because it wouldn't be regular. We
are going to be able to talk about what happens
at these games and the feelings, and we can expand
on the games to count as the season goes on. Absolutely,
(42:51):
because it's going to be exciting and you know, we
know the feeling, so we're going to share that and
get everyone to feel that. And Jim, it wasn't the honor.
I mean, I love you. You've been an influence of me.
I think what you're doing is fantastic. I think it's
so important to get a player into European League from
Long Island and letting the young people see what can
(43:13):
be done if they do want to go in that direction,
and to open it up to let families have a
cool night out, enjoy this sport, have fun and realize
the games do count. And I'm so proud of you
and grateful and I'm so happy to be helping him
be a part of it.
Speaker 6 (43:30):
Well, your partner now and I'm proud of you. I'm
proud of both of you guys. I know where you
came from. I remember everybody came from. You know, we
all had good families. But you know, it's been a
lot of drive on this phone call. So it's even
more gratifying to be able to pull this all together
for the sport that brought us together, to help take
the sport to a higher level. With three great guys,
(43:53):
two life ackers, and one American soccer club guy. Now
we're all together. So I with you guys.
Speaker 3 (43:58):
I'm sitting across from Rick, and I always remember the
only thing in when we played them was my desire
to kill him.
Speaker 2 (44:07):
I still see that look from time to time. Jim,
I'm gonna be honest, dude, that header boy, you're going
up to catch it.
Speaker 3 (44:15):
I'm gonna claw for you. Yeah, oh man, that was the.
Speaker 6 (44:20):
Entire time. That's okay, Yeah, it was still How about that?
Speaker 3 (44:24):
Oh yeah, well that's that's part of the games, to
count his fight and then go out after.
Speaker 6 (44:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (44:30):
I think one of the ultimate about you know, kind
of full circles. When I spent time refereeing and I
saw a lot of behavior and I had to admonish
players and coaches for behavior that I clearly admitted to being,
you know, strongly, probably one of the worst defenders. And
I get it. But it is interesting because the twenty
five and under male brain not always so fully formed.
(44:53):
But I do recognize those.
Speaker 3 (44:55):
Never is but I think that that's the that's why
we have to do these type of shows and right
have to have these discussions because you don't get the
confirmation of faith or the understanding until you get the
whole package. And our job is to try and give
them the foundation and you know, so that they developed, right,
(45:17):
they build. Yeah, the fact that's all we can do.
You're gonna do dumb stuff and all that. That's okay,
but the core value, teamwork, friendships, desire, effort, all those
things of what really make the games count.
Speaker 6 (45:29):
Absolutely well, guys, it's been a pleasure to be on
your show. I'll give you one last little note. Saturday
a conference years ago, Positive Coaching Alliance thing.
Speaker 7 (45:38):
Sometimes you dismiss these things and love that organization ash
you very good, and they put a survey out that
underlines everything that we just discussed here today, and it
stays with me because even I got it wrong and
I thought I would have gotten And it was this.
Speaker 6 (45:50):
They interview thirty athlete. The athlete sort of thirty years old,
a decade after they finished their college career Division one
and you know Notre Dame football players, field hockey player
is from Lafayette, the top top Michigan basketball players. They
did all that stuff, and they said, Okay, looking back
at your career, what was the main thing. Did you
remember that you're called the most important thing that happened
to you during your playing career. Now with those guys,
(46:11):
you know they're on TV. You know now they're getting money.
But I thought winning would have been up in the
top three. Two. Winning was like four. The number one
thing that they took away from that was if they played,
they didn't get played time. They had a very negative feeling.
And number two was the relationships that they developed. And
I've never forgotten that. And I don't care if you're
(46:33):
coaching you twelve girls in Mineola or if you're running
a franchise like we're professional franchise like ours, if you're
not getting on the field, it's going to be tough oneing.
But I will also teach you a lesson. That's the
games do count. And the other part is is the
fact that you have friends for life because you have
a common denominator. If you guys have clearly you're on this,
you're hosting a radio show and look at us talking
(46:53):
here all these years later.
Speaker 3 (46:54):
So if the game is a micro life, you go out,
you build a team, face failure, adversity, and you develop
relationships and you succeed or fail.
Speaker 2 (47:05):
And it's similar.
Speaker 3 (47:07):
Get out there and play well, it's fun as heck
knocking people over.
Speaker 2 (47:11):
Well. We thank Jim Kilmeade the American Star Club of
New York.
Speaker 3 (47:15):
Today we're talking about the games do count? Right, and
what does that mean? It's the unrealized reason we play sports, right.
But I was thinking right when we were coming up,
it's a bigger picture, right, You and I and Jim
have kind of this odd responsibility. We're the last generation
(47:36):
of pre information, right, We're the last ones. So we
have a different perspective on things. It is what it is.
There's pros and there's cons. But if you look at
what's going on, right, we have all this information and
technology and making things easier. And I was thinking, you know,
(47:57):
you're online to get coffee and the guy in front
of you as card and the chip and it don't
work and you there for ten minutes. We used to
hand the guy money and leave. Right, you go in
to elevator. There's no buttons because you have to hit
it on the outside. So all these things that made
it simpler also make it maybe more complicated, right folks
like us, right so and anyone. But the point is
(48:18):
we have to be conscious that these advances aren't necessarily better.
And when we talk about the games to count, you know,
my daughter was in uh well, she played soccer mass
speaker SoC club just like we did, just like Jim did.
And it turned into this system of coaches and trainers
(48:39):
and you know, it got extreme. We weren't allowed to
have a team name, and we didn't have practices. They
all went to one practice. And in my head, it
wasn't better, No, it was worse, and it was destroying
the real purpose of early sports. And now my daughter
goes and gymnastics like twenty four times a day every day. Right,
(49:02):
I remember running from soccer practice. It's a baseball practice
played both. Now this is your sport and you've got
to commit it, like ten years old, and now it's
your life it's not supposed to be that way.
Speaker 2 (49:16):
Well, as you point out, you mentioned different youth sports
that you know, we grew up with and kids grew
up with. Now everything has changed. Every sport has changed,
both in how we find out about it, how we
share information about, how we find feedback, but also at
the root of it, there's money being made, and I
think that that is one aspect of it changing things.
(49:38):
So we'll continue and our children will continue to get
life lessons from the engagement in these sports. Some of
its sportsmanship, some of its ethics, some of it's you know,
bigger picture stuff. But clearly it's been changed from the
innocent times that we grew up in when it was
just about the game.
Speaker 3 (49:56):
Well, what I noticed though, too, is the quicker depletion
of the number of kids playing. When you have a
system that says, you know, we're going to bring in
professional coaches make you better, and then you say the
best players, well, the best players are going to get
more attention. Then we're going to create a special league
for the best players. Well, then the kids that's not
that good. They ain't going.
Speaker 2 (50:17):
Right, You're not about development anymore.
Speaker 3 (50:20):
To back up to the title, right, our show is
we take a topic and we retrospectively look at and
a lot of it's from my book, but we we
can use other topics. But I think in this world
of TikTok and the news being this and that, boom
boom boom, boom boom, slow it down, pay attention, let's
(50:41):
look at the deeper aspect and the humanity. Right when
you watch the news, it's all these you know, terrible
things are good, but it's there's not the connection to
what really matters. Right. So in the book The Games
Do Count by Brian kill Me, our friend, great book,
people should get it. He doesn't look at the superstar
(51:05):
athlete per se. He looks about the successful person and
what their lack of athletic ability.
Speaker 2 (51:14):
Right. In some cases they were successful athletes, but they
all took lessons away. And there's sixty some odd you know,
Burt Reynolds, Gerald Ford, George Bush, Oliver North, James Brown, broadcaster.
Speaker 3 (51:28):
Well how about the one from his show that he
talks about Robin Williams. Right, right, so you know you
think of Robin Williams really deep dude and a very
good human.
Speaker 2 (51:38):
Not necessarily an athlete, right, But that.
Speaker 3 (51:41):
Was the key and what's the thing. He says, he
was the third midfield like.
Speaker 2 (51:45):
Guard tackle, we only played two midfield We only played
with two midfielders.
Speaker 3 (51:49):
Say that the right way?
Speaker 2 (51:50):
Well he I think he said I was the fourth midfielder.
And you know the only problem is our coach played
with you know, our team played with three midfielders. So
that's almost like the the old end guard tackle for
the football position. Will I sit at the end of
the bench, I guard the water bottle, and if anybody
comes near it and it's not authorized, I tackle him.
Speaker 3 (52:10):
That was your position?
Speaker 2 (52:11):
Yeah, yeah, that's why I didn't play football right, stuck
with soccer. But you know what what strikes me in
all of the conversations that we've had with Brian kill
me about you know, his book the tie into the
chapter of your book. And we mentioned the website. So
for those folks and when we talk about a topic,
make sure you pick up Sorry can't is a lie
(52:32):
by Arthur Lee. Today we're talking about the chapter that's
the same title as Brian's book, The Games Do Count.
Speaker 3 (52:39):
The book is these moments that have the deeper meaning.
And you know, faith in old leads are an interesting thing.
You have to have faith long enough for it to
pay off, right, and you have to get old enough
to realize that that happens. So the challenge we faced
with kind of educating our kids or trying to share
(52:59):
life experiences, you know, you have to get them to
believe in this mythical outcome of dedication commitment. And they say,
but when you're older, you approved it. So if you didn't,
you're gonna have issues that you should have. And if
you do, you're going to get the reward and understand.
So we have to transition generation from you know, we
(53:23):
used to watch back of white TV, and we used
to drive a car, and my dad watched the radio
and black of white TV and drove a car. Now
we TikTok and the car drives itself. It's a new world,
so we have a responsibility to try and view that.
Speaker 2 (53:36):
We're gonna talk more. We'll be back next week. I'm Rick.
I'm with Arthur Lee CEO and ventor of Life BacT
on The Man in the Arena.
Speaker 1 (53:45):
The proceeding was a paid podcast. iHeartRadio's hosting of this
podcast constitutes neither an endorsement of the products offered or
the ideas expressed
The following is a paid podcast. iHeartRadio's hosting of this
podcast constitutes neither an endorsement of the products offered or
the ideas expressed.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
Welcome to the Man in the Arena, where bold conversations,
real challenges, and unstoppable determination takes setter stage. This is
the show that brings you unfiltered insights from leaders, visionaries,
and everyday warriors who refuse to sit on the sidelines.
Join the movement brought to you by Life Fact, the
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hundred lives in thirty nine countries. Go to lifefac dot
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for discounts on protecting those you love. Teddy Roosevelt said
it best. It is not the critical accounts, not the
man who points out how the strong man stumbles. The
credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.
(00:51):
What inspired Arthur Lee protecting his daughter and then the
world's success Leaves Clues will explore each chapter of author's book,
Sorry Can't is a Lie, and hear from other men
and women in their arenas. Get ready to be inspired.
Welcome to the Man in the arena. I'm Rick Thatcher
with the CEO, inventor of Life BacT Arthur Lee Arthur.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
So many things go through my head. But today we're
talking about the games to count, right, and what does
that mean? It's the unrealized reason we play sports, right.
But I was thinking right when we were coming up,
it's a bigger picture, right, You and I and Jim,
who will be our guests, have kind of this odd responsibility.
(01:38):
We're the last generation of pre information right with the
last ones, so we have a different perspective on things now.
I'm not the guy you know we walk up the
hill in the snow both ways when I was a kid.
It is what it is. There's pros and there's cons, right,
But if you look at what's going on going on, right,
(02:00):
we have all this information and technology and making things easier.
And I was thinking, you know, you're online to get
coffee and the guy in front of he has his
card and a chip and it don't work and you're
there for ten minutes. We used to hand the guy
money and leave.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Right.
Speaker 3 (02:15):
You go in to elevator, there's no buttons because you
have to hit it on the outside. So all these
things that made it simpler, also make it maybe more complicated,
right folks like us, right so and anyone. But the
point is we have to be conscious that these advances
aren't necessarily better. And when we talk about the games
(02:36):
to count, you know, my daughter was in uh well,
she played soccer, mass speaker sock club, just like we did,
just like Jim did. And it turned into this system
of coaches and trainers, and you know that it got extreme.
We weren't allowed to have a team name, and we
didn't have practices. They all went to one practice and
(02:57):
in my head, it wasn't better, it was worse, and
it was destroying the real purpose of early sports. And
now my daughter goes and gymnastics. It's like twenty four
hours a day every day. Right, I remember running from
soccer practice. It's a baseball practice played both. Now this
(03:18):
is your sport and you've got to commit it like
ten years old and now it's your life. It's not
supposed to be that way.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Well, as you point out, you mentioned different youth sports
that you know, we grew up with and kids grew
up with. Now everything has changed. Every sport has changed,
both in how we find out about it, how we
share information about how we found feedback, but also at
the root of it, there's money being made, and I
think that that is one aspect of it changing things.
(03:48):
So we'll continue and our children will continue to get
life lessons from the engagement in these sports. Some of
its sportsmanship, some of its ethics, some of it's you know, bigger,
pick your stuff. But clearly it's been changed from the
innocent times that we grew up in when it was
just about the game.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Well. What I noticed, though, too, is the quicker depletion
of the number of kids playing. When you have a
system that says, you know, we're going to bring in
professional coaches make you better, and then you say the
best players, well, the best players are going to get
more attention. Then we're going to create a special league
for the best players. Well then the kids that's not
that good, they ain't going.
Speaker 2 (04:27):
Right, You're not about development anymore.
Speaker 3 (04:29):
Those to back up to the title, right, our show
is we take a topic and we retrospectively look at
and a lot of it's from my book, but we
can use other topics. But I think in this world
of TikTok and the news being this and that boom
boom boom, boom boom. Slow it down, pay attention. Let's
(04:51):
look at the deeper aspect and the humanity. Right when
you watch the news, it's all these, you know, terrible things,
but it's there's not the connection to what really matters. Right.
So in the book The Games Do Count by Brian Kilme,
our friend, great book, people should get it. He doesn't
(05:13):
look at the superstar athlete per se. He looks about
the successful person and what their lack of athletic ability.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
Right. In some cases they were successful athletes, but they
all took lessons away. And there's sixty some odd you know.
Burt Reynolds, Gerald Ford, George Bush, Oliver North, James Brown broadcaster.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
Well, how about the one from his show that he
talks about Robin Williams. Right, right, so you know you
think of Robin Williams really deep dude and a very
good human.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Not necessarily an athlete.
Speaker 3 (05:50):
Right, but that was the key And what's the thing
He says, he was the third midfield.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
And guard tackle. We only played two midfield We only
played with two midfielders.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
Okay, say that though, right?
Speaker 2 (06:00):
Well he I think he said I was the fourth midfielder,
and you know, the only problem is our coach played
with you know, our team played with three midfielders. So
that's almost like the old ND guard tackle for the
football position. Will I sit at the end of the bench,
I guard the water bottle, and if anybody comes near
it and it's not authorized, I tackle him.
Speaker 3 (06:20):
Position.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Yeah, yeah, that's why I didn't play football. Stuck with soccer.
But you know what what strikes me in all of
the conversations that we've had with Brian Killmead about you know,
his book which we should you know, relay and tie
in which we will when we talked to Jim Killmead
the tie into the chapter of your book, and we
mentioned the website. So for those folks and when we
(06:43):
talk about a topic, make sure you pick up Sorry
Can't is a Lie by Arthur Lee. Today we're talking
about the chapter that's the same title as Brian's book,
The Games Do Count, And that's what we're going to
be talking about today.
Speaker 3 (06:55):
The book is these moments that have the deep meaning.
And you know, faith in old age are an interesting thing.
You have to have faith long enough for it to
pay off, right, and you have to get old enough
to realize that that happens. But so the challenge we
face with kind of educating our kids or trying to
(07:16):
share life experiences, you know, you have to get them
to believe in this mythical outcome of dedication commitment. And
they say, you know, but when you're older, you approved it.
So if you didn't, you're going to have issues that
you should have and if you do, you're going to
get the reward and understand. So we have to transition
(07:39):
generation from you know, we used to watch black and
white TV, and we used to drive a car and
my dad watched the radio and black of white TV
and drove a car. Now we TikTok and the car
drives itself. It's a new world. So we have a
responsibility to try and view that and share these things.
So let's go back Robin Williams, right, and Brian you know,
(08:01):
interviews him as he did George Bush and Jerald Ford
and all these guys, and it was the connection to
the sport that became part of their persona, which is
what is necessary to be quote unquote successful. Right.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
The life lessons right.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
Yeah, and what are they? Right? And like you said,
when Jim comes on, we will talk more, but you were
you played talker? I played talker, but that was our game.
I played everything, but I wasn't particularly good at anything.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
But that's according to you. People disagree that it was
a very tough town that you played in.
Speaker 3 (08:37):
No, it was, and that was awesome. But for this
we're still friends. Marian and I are still friends. I
am still friends with a lot of my soccer buddies
and my basketball buddies, and there was a bond. But
if you look at the difference, right, my dad coached
our basketball team, Jim coached our soccer team. He was
two years older than us. So it wasn't a paid
(09:01):
dude who came down because it was his job.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
And then he left, right, there was an investment.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
Do you remember something? Did you play little league? That
was an interesting group of dad coaches baseball. Yeah, it
seemed to be a little more relaxed dais ago in the.
Speaker 2 (09:17):
Well base pastime. So it goes along with the general
feel about baseball. Let's play two.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
I never ever forget. We had a game called on
account of bugs because we were playing to Anchor Park
and there was too many Nats and all, and he
just we were all like out with this game, right,
and I also remember I had a coach that would
wrap up practice because he wanted to get home to
watch his TV show, right, and even tell us, you know,
we we got to wrap up. I got ellery queen
(09:43):
at seven.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
Oh my goodness, gracious, let's watch television back then.
Speaker 3 (09:48):
But the reality was it was almost more appropriate to say,
it's not that big a deal. I don't care, you know,
just have fun, right, right, right, mister Watson, right, you go,
what you did it? Practice? Scrimmage, Go scrimmage, scrimmage. I
love scrimmage, hated drills, right, I wasn't very good on him, right, scrimmage.
Speaker 2 (10:07):
It was no by the way, absolutely right. Besides maybe
trying juggling, there was no technical dreamer. It was all
functional and that's the way they played. Mister Watson references
we both had him as a coach and intramurals Scottish
and it was what we call direct soccer. Kick it
in that direction and everybody, including uh you know, maybe
(10:31):
the goalkeeper at times, get involved and go direct. There
was no tactical trapping, controlling heading, but you know, all
the things.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
Abound it that that was what made it fun and
also why everyone could play, right, some of the You
know that we all have different ability, right, and that's
beautiful and that's life. But the kid that wasn't very good,
you know, and he had dribbled cones and do all
the stuff. You know, he looks like an e in
front of everyone, and he don't want to do it anymore.
(11:00):
We just played and you know, you tried to use
the Crummey kid as bad as you could in your
mix of the team. But he was on your team.
He was your friend. But there was this increased seriousness
of the game. Is deteriorating the games do count? Right?
Speaker 2 (11:19):
I was going to think before to ask about the
difference in these lessons that you learned and having faith,
did it make it easier for you once you got
it to then coach your daughter because you've seen it
and you've learned it, and maybe she could benefit from.
Speaker 3 (11:34):
One of the last generations of a dad coach. Now, yes,
look they still coach, but it it tends to be
much more serious in their game. When I coached volleyball,
I used to have them at the end of practice
they would have to try and bump the ball into
the hoop, the basketball.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
Hoop and little cross functional training. They would call that.
Speaker 3 (11:53):
But and I would put a stuffed animal on a
stick over the net and if you hit him, you know.
And I actually used to give away like funky sunglasses.
I made a game, but he made it fun right, right,
And then when we scrimmaged, I would play right. I
was with him right soccer too. I used to love
(12:14):
that because I was way better than the three year
olds and stuff. But yeah, but they're horrible. It's advantage
knocked them all like doesn't. But the point was it
made it fun, you know, I had I used stuffed
animals for goalkeepers because some reason, when you're little, you
kick it right to the guy in the middle.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Yeah, you said it earlier in the conversation. You know,
one of my goals you want. I wanted my whole
team to want to come to the next practice. I
want to come to the next game, and that's where
we start. And I think some parents thought, because of
my involvement in soccer, I was taking it too serious. Heck, no,
nothing further In the truth. I wanted, you know, my
(12:52):
kids certainly, but also the entire team, regardless of skill level,
regardless of their initial excitement about the sport, to want
to come back, and it sounds like I did exactly
very much the same thing.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Well, I mean in my boyble, because we had so
much fun. They my practice were packed. Every kid came
in to practice, you know. And it wasn't because they were,
you know, wanted to become world class volleyball players. It
was because we had a lot of fun. And that
was just you know, that was the way it is.
But now we're taking that back to our reminiscing to
(13:29):
the book Why Do the Games Count?
Speaker 2 (13:31):
Right, you're listening to the man in arena. I'm Rick Thatcher,
and I apologized for cutting off mister Arthur, Lady's CEO,
but I was thinking about the games do Count? It
reminded me of the classroom setting when students would in
high school ask the teacher does spelling count?
Speaker 3 (13:48):
And the frustration Adam Tyler.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Madame Tyler, does spelling count? And it had to be
the frustration if I what difference does it make if
I tell you like the games the spell do your best?
Speaker 3 (14:01):
I did it. I wrote a paper once in English
and I got an A plus over f I kind
of I kept that forever because she's like, I love
what you wrote. But you cannot spell you on sentences,
you have grandma. But I was like, I was proud
of that because if you had to pick which one
you got the A plus and which one you got
(14:22):
the flus and content, I'll figure out.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
Spelling you could fix and if we had it in
today's technology would have been done well.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
I was always counting on someone else fixing my spelling
and my grandma and I wrote on sentences much like
my book. But that's the point, right, It's not the
coach and the team and the touches and the thing.
It's that's the get an f The A plus is
you made friends, You were part of a team. You
(14:52):
picked up a guy that fell, You were picked up
by a guy that fell. You had a role, You
had a responsibility in that team of your role, regardless
of what it is. Robin Williams, he was the spirit.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
And the excitement of these individuals. You mentioned Robin Williams
in particular when Brian tells us privately the stories of
how they connect. Yeah, he had a return phone call.
He got a message from Roman Wims said yeah, I'll
call you later, right yeah, right, yeah, okay in what lifetime?
And he did call him later because why he knew
he was going to talk about what's this about sports?
(15:28):
And I wanted to tell that soccer story and there's
passion that never went away, right and the great stories.
But we're going to talk more about the Games Due Count,
a chapter of Arthur's book, Sorry Can't is a Lie,
So go to life fact dot net and get that book.
It's also the title of the book that we're also
talking about, The Games Due Count by Brian kill Mead,
and we'll talk to his brother Jim kill Mead after
(15:50):
this break.
Speaker 4 (15:50):
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Speaker 1 (17:46):
Now on iHeartRadio more of the Man in the Arena
the Life Back Radio Show.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Here again are Arthur Lee and Rick Thatcher. Go to
lifeback dot net if for no other reason than protect
yourself and your family with a life. But also again,
sorry can't is a lie? So you can join along
with the discussion the at home version sorry can't is
a lie. But we're talking about the chapter The Games
Do Count, all about youth sports, the life lessons that
(18:13):
can be both good and bad, that could be taken,
and some of the high profile individuals in the book,
about sixty of them, politicians, broadcasters, actors, actresses, all who
really enjoyed going back and recanting their stories about what
they learned.
Speaker 3 (18:30):
The little piece of their life that was in sports.
Whether they were good they weren't good, didn't matter. It
was what it did for their character that they attribute
to their success. And we are fortune enough to have
my former coach someone I looked up to and shape me.
Jim kill me.
Speaker 6 (18:49):
Great to be with you guys.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
So I was starting to tell you when they actually
said we should go back on the air, this story.
So this morning I saw it as a post and
it said, one of the greatest sounds I've ever heard
is when someone calls me coach. And I immediately thought
to you, because like I was, I don't know where
I was recently, and I heard a little kid say dad,
(19:13):
and I turned and that was the sweetest album in
the world, Dad, Dad, And then I've also had the
joy of coach. And they're right, and there's a reason
for that, because those are sweet sounds. You know, your
child calling your dad, or your players calling your coach.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
Did Jackie call you?
Speaker 3 (19:35):
He's called me coach when I coached there, right, But
that just that voice, yes it was. It wasn't for me, yes,
but you know you hear dad, you turn right? So
I thought to you, the today coach.
Speaker 6 (19:46):
And you know what, we came together and expected to
be a coach at seventeen. Never thought about it, but
you know, all these years later you look back at
it and if you follow a ready John Wooden, which
I think pretty much everybody on this call about John Wooden,
that was one of his lives. You know, he's an
English teacher that became a coach and when he was
(20:07):
college coach in the history of sports, and that was
what he said. It was one of the most satisfying
things to be called the coach was an honor, Yeah,
and I knew it was then, but I was trying
to still figure out in real time. At the same time,
it was quite a responsibility. But I look back now
and sometimes jealous of my wife, who's been a teacher
for twenty seven years because she gets to have the
(20:29):
satisfaction of working with kids every day as a profession.
And I look back and all the great things that
have happened to me in my professional life, and the
challenges and some of the hot my highlights go back
to coaching that mass peak of Celtic team in the
seventies and the teams that have coached since that, my
(20:49):
own kids, and a lot of people in between. He
had to resonate. I keep those notes more than I
keep any other notes.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
I get in the realm of the games to count right,
which is all about out the character building and accessorial
benefits of sport. Right. Do you feel that you got
more from coaching or playing?
Speaker 6 (21:09):
I think it's pretty close. It's very close, But I
think I got two different things. The life experience that
those younger years of playing, none of us knew how
that was shaping us. So I don't know what percentage
that would be. But it not only created a network
of peers and friends that are sometimes lifetime friends, that
(21:30):
go past everything and crossover every socio academic border. But
the coaching thing is something different. Coaching it makes you challenge,
just like being a parent or dad or mom. You
really have to think about what you stand for when
you're looking at twenty young men or women and you
see things that are resonating or not resonating in their eyes,
and so I think they affect me, probably equally, but
(21:52):
in two different ways.
Speaker 3 (21:53):
Well think about it too. Now I think more than ever,
this topic of the games to count is important, right
because we have become much more results orientated in sports,
not the real reason that you know, we play is
to build these characters and have fun. But on the
flip side of because I coached a little and I played,
(22:16):
and I played for you and you were good at it.
But when you coach and my dad was good this
he would try and get the best out of what
the player was, meaning it didn't matter how good he was,
it mattered about what you could help him achieve in
his capabilities, how you could fit him in the team
(22:36):
to make it useful for the team, and how to
reach him to inspire and make him enjoy the game
and do better. Right the round peg, round hole, Do
this drill? Do this drill? Well maybe in that good
at drills who gets to me that was You know
why I still look up to you and appreciate you
(22:57):
because you saw this, you know, mentally disturbed player and
help them keep self identify by the way.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
Self diagnosed at a very young age.
Speaker 6 (23:08):
But I'm the coach that actually identified him as somebody
I wanted to be on the team. And I was
one hundred percent right. Even from that day, at already
being a teenager, I could see that he had an
incredible desire to succeed and to be a good teammate.
And that's not common, Uh. I see a lot of
There's a lot of talent, and there's a lot of
people that are and sometimes very much all about themselves.
(23:31):
And I think in a very short period of time,
I saw already as someone man. If I'm a good coach,
if I'm a halfway decent coach, shame on me. If
I can't help make this guy maximize his ability. That's
the way you can just put him in a position
so he if he walked away from the game three
years from now, that he'll say, you know what, I
gave everything I had. I think I maximized my ability
because the worst feeling in life is that you didn't
(23:52):
maximize your ability. And and we on the field, right, yeah,
that'd be right, and we don't maximize our ability. We
all know it. It's personal and that was the goal.
But like your dad said, in that of talent level,
where do you start? Where do you finish?
Speaker 3 (24:08):
Well? The I think the one of the in the
games to can Arena is to me, the joy of
sports was the simplicity, meaning you went out and you
just gave it well everything you had, left it all
on the field. It was beautiful in that you could
just go give it everything you had and you did
(24:28):
and you're done when lose didn't matter. And when I
take back you know that to their life. When I
have a challenge, I just give it everything I got.
If I fail, I fail, right, But it's another piece
of the game, meaning the paid coach may not be
trying to develop this kid differently than that kid, right.
(24:51):
And the parents they're the kids. They want to see
them grow inside outside, right. And the joy of it
was it's life in a microcosm. Go out, do your best,
you may win, you may lose, you walk off. And
you say, I gave it everything I had and that
was fun And I'm good, right, because I think that
(25:14):
the lesson of that is if you want to succeed.
And from the book, it's people that we're not good
players necessarily you know, they were not the best.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
It didn't matter because the percentages dictate and hold true
that there are very few people that are going to
go on even past college. So what are you doing
to make everybody's experience a positive one and give the
good life lessons? And I was just struck with as
you describe. And I've talked to you before about mentors
and people that you know, examples that you could look to.
(25:45):
You put a coach Jim Kilmead along, and you were
fortunate to have Uncle Roger, your dad, your mom, a
support system, family, some people you know. Fortunately it's just
that they're a coach. Yeah, they don't have it.
Speaker 3 (26:00):
And if we don't acknowledge and and I think we know,
we certainly talk about Jim, what Jim's up to now,
and sure those lessons are creating something incredible and understanding
the neat but the show, the thought, the takeaway is
understand that that's what the real importance of early sports,
(26:21):
the teamwork, the friendships, the dedication, the commitment and your management.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
In my case, you know all of those lessons some
some came later. But how to behave how to treat
your teammates. You know, it's like playing Cowboys and Indians,
but with structure and how to talk and respect the regree.
But Jim, I wanted to ask you before we talk
about the American Soccer Club of New York, which is
so great, so exciting to talk about. I wanted to
(26:47):
ask you, because you know, the author of not only
Sorry Can's Life but also The Games Do Count, by
your brother, Brian Killmate, if you could think back, because
I would. I enjoyed doing this thinking back to when
the process of Brian writing that book, because it's one
of them. I think it was his first. It was
which profile stood out to you the most or what
story from the preparing, Like Brian preparing this book, it
(27:09):
stuck out the most.
Speaker 6 (27:10):
It's funny because Brian's written a whole bunch of books
now and one is the next one is better than
the next one. They're phenomenal history books. But when he
I think it was on a weekend and he mentioned
that he had an idea. We were just talking. He's like,
you know, I have an idea about writing a book.
And the thought of writing a book was like a
you kid made that it's easier to run a marathon
for twenty six miles to think about it, you'll write
(27:31):
a book where which did Yeah, exactly right. And it
resonates to me and goes, so, what's your idea? And
he told me the idea everybody had a story, and
so it resonated me because I'm taking to write a
story about all these people that didn't make it, but
they did have life changing experience. And sometimes you hear
a concept from somebody for business or an idea for
a book, and you're like, I don't get it. And
(27:54):
it hit me in a second and a hand that
that is such a great idea because we all have
a story. All three of us have a story. Well
you know, and the people were going to see today
have a story that we don't even know, and then
already took it and put into his book. Both books
I read on a flight too. By the way, Brian's
was a longer flight than this flight I have.
Speaker 3 (28:14):
Next door to read my book.
Speaker 6 (28:15):
Yeah, exactly, Yeah, it was Buffalo, perfect.
Speaker 3 (28:24):
Flight.
Speaker 6 (28:25):
It's relatable, not even about the length of it. Brian's
book had essays already had a lot of things to
talk about, including his own life, and it resonates with
normal people, if there is such a thing anymore. And
right away, I think I don't know if if any
one of them stood out. Rick, to answer your question,
I think the fact that when Robin Williams called Brian's houses,
(28:47):
I mean, that's just this is Rob Williams maybe the
most at that point in time, most prolific actor comedian ever,
and at that time he was in his prime, and
he's called a house because he's going to talk for
ten fifteen minutes about playing sports and how it kind
of saved him because he was an only child and
had his story and you would never think about that,
(29:08):
but it just goes to everything that we're talking about
here right now.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
Jim, that was my that was my example. I don't know,
you know, before you joined us. You know what's crazy
today I was.
Speaker 3 (29:16):
Thinking about as Jim was speaking. So Jim coached me
and Brian, you could say we did okay, we took
on like Brian is the word of reason and you
know we're saving thousands of lives. We had the same coach.
You want to back it out to the games to count.
I'm hoping that someone listening is going I have a
bigger responsibility than I thought when I coach, and as
(29:40):
your kid, you ski, I have a bigger responsibility than
not showing up that It's that we need to reach
that kid. My dad was great that he was when
he passed away kids from his PBC basketball teams saying
how they he influenced them. You know, and I say
it about Jim all the time, but this conversation needs
(30:03):
to be every coach, every player in the world needs
to know. It's about the outcome of your plan. Yeah
and have and when you're a coach, it's not about
who's the quick at Yes, that's important, but you got
to notice that Scott is not joining him right and
he is slower. But that way we can use him
(30:25):
as the shooting dummy.
Speaker 2 (30:29):
Now that's not right, Well, he's celebrity listening to Arthur Lee.
I'm Rick Thatcher and we're joined by Jim Killmead. Big
project coming up that we want to talk about is
the American Soccer Club of New York launching this month,
great announcements, and we want to talk about the coach,
certainly because I know it was hard probably for you
to not be the coach. But you have a lot
(30:51):
going on, Jef. He does, So, how exciting is this
new project?
Speaker 6 (30:55):
Well, you know what, I'm sure anybody's ever started anything
a business team, Exciting is definitely part of it. But
if you're starting anything from scratch, which when you look back,
is the single the best things you've ever done in
your life, at least for me, during it, you don't
appreciate anywhere near as much as you do later. So
we're in that process of digging the hole, you know,
(31:16):
and we're using shovels, we're not using big equipment, and
ultimately it's one relationship at a time, from corporate partners
to kids and families, and so we're in that mode
right now with almost a thirty three day window. Now
it's the opening day, so it's a great time. We
are a small club with big plants. And I say
that all the time, and I meet it, and we're
(31:39):
building it one relationship at a time. We're not writing
million dollar checks and buying the media time. We're literally
we're earning every fan we have, every partner we have,
And I think we've got a really good core group
of local investors. I call a band of brothers, self
made guys and soon to be sisters hopefully band of
sisters as well, that have come up and and and
(32:00):
all had one common bond, had some kind of an
experience in this in our sport, and that that's that's
very gratifying. My partner Kevin Reard and another guy from
Long Island Hicksfield soccer player, boredhom guy, uh, real good
financial guy too. All very humble people, uh, with a
lot of pride. And we got a great coach and
John Fitzgerald another guy, not a Hicksville guy and know
(32:22):
what's going on with Hicksville, but prolific coach used to
be yeah, college coach as well as been he's coaches
coaches and been around for a long time. And John
and I go back to having no kids and uh,
no families and coaching in our twenties against each other
for our former club Messapequa, and we've got a good
group of people.
Speaker 3 (32:42):
Talk a little bit about the team and the league.
Speaker 6 (32:46):
We're gonna be playing our first game in our inaugural season,
our first game ever, May fourth, Sunday night, seven pm
at Hopshire University's Captain's Field. It's the top Soccerspacific venue
in the New York metro Long Island area. Uh and
it's my alma made, so it's it's great to go
back as a guy that played there for four years
and to come back with a professional team, and to
(33:07):
be at my own field. It's actually quite a better
complex than when I was there. But that's that's a
sort of surprise as well. Listen, guys, our team is
all local players. And the players that aren't local, that
weren't born here have been living here for you know,
a decade or two, came here as kids from other countries.
But we're ninety five percent born and bred here. Kids
(33:27):
from North Fork, kids from Stony Brook, kids from New
Hyde Park, and a lot of local college players. That's
what we are. To be a very young team with
a couple of very experienced players, and those players. You know,
we think at one point we'll start to become household
names here. So we've we've signed players. We've got some
super experienced players like Jorge and Albert Alberto and Niedo.
(33:48):
These guys are two of our farm players. They're they're
twin brothers. Played in Ecuador. It's like Aiden Colby and
from from Northport the Harbor Soccer Club playing for Brook University.
So this is the chance for them all to play
in part of their hometowns. We have Sean Fitzgerald from
Binghamton and Brian Sara Mago from from Loyola University Graduate
(34:12):
Red Bulls Academy. Played in Portugal, but you know he's
a local guy.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
Players to watch. Just like New York, it's a melting pot.
We're diverse, we're inclusive, and we're going to celebrate this
tomorrow live for a launch party. But then May fourth,
first game you're listening to Jim Kilnea to Arthur Lee.
I'm Rick Thatcher and we'll be back with more the
man in the arena after this break.
Speaker 5 (34:35):
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Speaker 1 (36:05):
Now on iHeartRadio, more of the Man in the Arena,
the Life Back Radio Show.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
Here again are Arthur Lee and Rick Thatcher talking with
Jim Killmead, who's part of this very exciting local sports
story these coach and I think, yeah, Coach kill Mead
is gonna I think he's going to share the story
of the name. Because all of this is we've been
let in on some of the announcements, the reveals. There's
(36:31):
going to be I think a very interesting uniform revealed tomorrow.
But Jim, can you tell us about the name? I
got on first question.
Speaker 3 (36:37):
I wanted to talk to Jim. You know, when you
were discussing the local talent that the Bob Appadaca Roy
White story came to me. And I think that the youth,
the kids that are into soccer, and even if they're not,
and you know that maybe we can get him into it.
But the accessibility to see these guys that grew up
(36:59):
in their namehoods go on and play at that level. Right.
And two, you know when I was ten and I
met Bob Appadaca, the relief picture for the Mets, it
was like I met the greatest guy in the world.
But it's inspiring. And I think that our job that
support Jim and is to let people know, come down,
(37:22):
meet these guys, see him playing, Let your kids see.
I remember going to see Pele at Randall's Island. What
I was thinking was when you were talking about the
local talent, right, and I remember our Bob Appadac of
Roy White discussion. Oh yeah, So the to me that
was a big moment, right. He wasn't a Hall of Fame,
(37:44):
He was a good picture, but I was so excited, right,
And Jim had a similar experience with Roy White. But
for this part and why you got to come out
to Hofstrom, bring your kids, bring your little kid team,
bring the team, you know, go as a team seeing
Pele and rand Loose Island. This is inspiration. Yes, right, Jim.
Speaker 6 (38:06):
I think the connectivity already with you and Bob Abadaka
and myself at Roy White is that got a chance
to meet them. They're accessible back in the day. And
and that's not the way it is anymore with Major
League anything, baseball, soccer. Uh. That's that's the beauty and
the real core value of what we are because we're
entire our entire existence is based on our community involvement.
(38:27):
We're doing big appearances this weekend, uh for the Loyland
Junior Soccer League in the HBC Soccer Park for their
developmental days. And there's Peter Collins Soccer Park in plain View.
Our players live here, They're going to live here, definitely,
and they're part of the community. They've grown up in
the clubs. They understand the dynamic, the competitive nature of
where we all live and and I think their goal
(38:50):
now is to come together as a team, which Jon
Fancherald will work hard on and pull these guys together
so they can actually represent Long Island Metro New York
the way you the three of us understand it very competitive.
Speaker 3 (39:03):
But I think that you know, if we are the
circle back and the back of our heads and all,
and the games do count, right, so we know the
real importance of the sport. And then we tied it
into you know, kind of dilution of the you know,
trainer and this and that, and we get young people
to come out and watch and say that kid grew
up in brent would look at him play right, And
(39:26):
I've seen two and I know you'll do it. Is
the camaraderie and teamwork and their bond right, showing off that,
like you said, making them accessible, right, saying you know, hey,
we we're a team. Man. This is great and letting
them see that, you know, up close. And I really
think there's a godwin to me and you and Brian
and Rick they would all play talking together that are
(39:49):
now trying to support you, save lives with life. I
can support the team to bring that atmosphere back.
Speaker 6 (39:56):
That's great. And you mentioned kids from Brentwood. We've got
three from Brentwood, style On Acosta, Kenny Cordova, and these
communities are tight, and these guys get a chance now.
It's also for them too. They get a chance to
show that they've dedicated the whole life to this whole thing.
And me, a lot of players get missed too. If
we're talking about now that five percent of players of
the ninety of the one hundred percent of all of us,
(40:17):
it couldn't make it into the pro ranks or whatever.
This is a chance for these guys too, and part
of our the American South Club New York's and our
website is ASC New York dot com, is to not
only to showcase the best of the metro Low Island area,
but to launch some of these players into European careers.
Not everybody will be able to do it, but we
(40:38):
know there are players here. In a market of almost
four or five six million people counting the city, we
know that there are players here. Right now, we have
one player from Long Island that is playing in Europe.
His name is Joe Scalley. He's from Lake Grove. He's
playing from munchin Glaubloch and Bundesliga. He got a chance
to play and a fully funded academy for no but
(41:01):
he had to go into the city and if he
didn't have a family that can take days off five
days a week, he wouldn't have made it. So we're
looking to put that academy and developed this academy after
this year for the for the top players, regardless of
where you come from or how much money you have,
or your background or your family support that we're going
to underwrite the careers of an academy full of youth
(41:21):
players and that will start after we launched our first
season this year with the men's American Soccer Club New
York team.
Speaker 3 (41:27):
Do you know, do you know if there's any openings
for a sixty year old goalie and a sixty year
old you know, akey fullback for a friend. Well, here's
what I think.
Speaker 2 (41:41):
I think I may rear my ugly goalkeeper head large
head and maybe one of the contests.
Speaker 6 (41:47):
Yes, yes, well, here's what I'm saying. You just nailed it,
and almost if they can change the substitution rules, here's
what I would do, And I would talk to John
make sure John Fitzgerald, the head coach, buys in on this.
If there was a corner kick opportunity in the final
five minutes of the half of the game, I'd want
to throw already on there just for one heading opportunity.
Speaker 3 (42:06):
Oh my god, I just gotta hill and I want.
Speaker 6 (42:09):
And if we had a penalty gig against us, I'd
want to throw a ricking goal because rick, we'll get
inside the shooter's head.
Speaker 2 (42:15):
I'll get in there. I'll live in there.
Speaker 3 (42:18):
Hey, one are the halftime shows. We cant have old timers, uh,
contest where I get to try to head, we get
to shoot on Rick itself.
Speaker 6 (42:28):
Yeah, talk about the halftime show that we're putting together.
Speaker 3 (42:31):
You know, well, why do you see it's gonna be fun.
You know you got to come on more, you know,
periodically all the time, because it wouldn't be regular. We
are going to be able to talk about what happens
at these games and the feelings, and we can expand
on the games to count as the season goes on. Absolutely,
(42:51):
because it's going to be exciting and you know, we
know the feeling, so we're going to share that and
get everyone to feel that. And Jim, it wasn't the honor.
I mean, I love you. You've been an influence of me.
I think what you're doing is fantastic. I think it's
so important to get a player into European League from
Long Island and letting the young people see what can
(43:13):
be done if they do want to go in that direction,
and to open it up to let families have a
cool night out, enjoy this sport, have fun and realize
the games do count. And I'm so proud of you
and grateful and I'm so happy to be helping him
be a part of it.
Speaker 6 (43:30):
Well, your partner now and I'm proud of you. I'm
proud of both of you guys. I know where you
came from. I remember everybody came from. You know, we
all had good families. But you know, it's been a
lot of drive on this phone call. So it's even
more gratifying to be able to pull this all together
for the sport that brought us together, to help take
the sport to a higher level. With three great guys,
(43:53):
two life ackers, and one American soccer club guy. Now
we're all together. So I with you guys.
Speaker 3 (43:58):
I'm sitting across from Rick, and I always remember the
only thing in when we played them was my desire
to kill him.
Speaker 2 (44:07):
I still see that look from time to time. Jim,
I'm gonna be honest, dude, that header boy, you're going
up to catch it.
Speaker 3 (44:15):
I'm gonna claw for you. Yeah, oh man, that was the.
Speaker 6 (44:20):
Entire time. That's okay, Yeah, it was still How about that?
Speaker 3 (44:24):
Oh yeah, well that's that's part of the games, to
count his fight and then go out after.
Speaker 6 (44:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (44:30):
I think one of the ultimate about you know, kind
of full circles. When I spent time refereeing and I
saw a lot of behavior and I had to admonish
players and coaches for behavior that I clearly admitted to being,
you know, strongly, probably one of the worst defenders. And
I get it. But it is interesting because the twenty
five and under male brain not always so fully formed.
(44:53):
But I do recognize those.
Speaker 3 (44:55):
Never is but I think that that's the that's why
we have to do these type of shows and right
have to have these discussions because you don't get the
confirmation of faith or the understanding until you get the
whole package. And our job is to try and give
them the foundation and you know, so that they developed, right,
(45:17):
they build. Yeah, the fact that's all we can do.
You're gonna do dumb stuff and all that. That's okay,
but the core value, teamwork, friendships, desire, effort, all those
things of what really make the games count.
Speaker 6 (45:29):
Absolutely well, guys, it's been a pleasure to be on
your show. I'll give you one last little note. Saturday
a conference years ago, Positive Coaching Alliance thing.
Speaker 7 (45:38):
Sometimes you dismiss these things and love that organization ash
you very good, and they put a survey out that
underlines everything that we just discussed here today, and it
stays with me because even I got it wrong and
I thought I would have gotten And it was this.
Speaker 6 (45:50):
They interview thirty athlete. The athlete sort of thirty years old,
a decade after they finished their college career Division one
and you know Notre Dame football players, field hockey player
is from Lafayette, the top top Michigan basketball players. They
did all that stuff, and they said, Okay, looking back
at your career, what was the main thing. Did you
remember that you're called the most important thing that happened
to you during your playing career. Now with those guys,
(46:11):
you know they're on TV. You know now they're getting money.
But I thought winning would have been up in the
top three. Two. Winning was like four. The number one
thing that they took away from that was if they played,
they didn't get played time. They had a very negative feeling.
And number two was the relationships that they developed. And
I've never forgotten that. And I don't care if you're
(46:33):
coaching you twelve girls in Mineola or if you're running
a franchise like we're professional franchise like ours, if you're
not getting on the field, it's going to be tough oneing.
But I will also teach you a lesson. That's the
games do count. And the other part is is the
fact that you have friends for life because you have
a common denominator. If you guys have clearly you're on this,
you're hosting a radio show and look at us talking
(46:53):
here all these years later.
Speaker 3 (46:54):
So if the game is a micro life, you go out,
you build a team, face failure, adversity, and you develop
relationships and you succeed or fail.
Speaker 2 (47:05):
And it's similar.
Speaker 3 (47:07):
Get out there and play well, it's fun as heck
knocking people over.
Speaker 2 (47:11):
Well. We thank Jim Kilmeade the American Star Club of
New York.
Speaker 3 (47:15):
Today we're talking about the games do count? Right, and
what does that mean? It's the unrealized reason we play sports, right.
But I was thinking right when we were coming up,
it's a bigger picture, right, You and I and Jim
have kind of this odd responsibility. We're the last generation
(47:36):
of pre information, right, We're the last ones. So we
have a different perspective on things. It is what it is.
There's pros and there's cons. But if you look at
what's going on, right, we have all this information and
technology and making things easier. And I was thinking, you know,
(47:57):
you're online to get coffee and the guy in front
of you as card and the chip and it don't
work and you there for ten minutes. We used to
hand the guy money and leave. Right, you go in
to elevator. There's no buttons because you have to hit
it on the outside. So all these things that made
it simpler also make it maybe more complicated, right folks
like us, right so and anyone. But the point is
(48:18):
we have to be conscious that these advances aren't necessarily better.
And when we talk about the games to count, you know,
my daughter was in uh well, she played soccer mass
speaker SoC club just like we did, just like Jim did.
And it turned into this system of coaches and trainers
(48:39):
and you know, it got extreme. We weren't allowed to
have a team name, and we didn't have practices. They
all went to one practice. And in my head, it
wasn't better, No, it was worse, and it was destroying
the real purpose of early sports. And now my daughter
goes and gymnastics like twenty four times a day every day. Right,
(49:02):
I remember running from soccer practice. It's a baseball practice
played both. Now this is your sport and you've got
to commit it, like ten years old, and now it's
your life it's not supposed to be that way.
Speaker 2 (49:16):
Well, as you point out, you mentioned different youth sports
that you know, we grew up with and kids grew
up with. Now everything has changed. Every sport has changed,
both in how we find out about it, how we
share information about, how we find feedback, but also at
the root of it, there's money being made, and I
think that that is one aspect of it changing things.
(49:38):
So we'll continue and our children will continue to get
life lessons from the engagement in these sports. Some of
its sportsmanship, some of its ethics, some of it's you know,
bigger picture stuff. But clearly it's been changed from the
innocent times that we grew up in when it was
just about the game.
Speaker 3 (49:56):
Well, what I noticed though, too, is the quicker depletion
of the number of kids playing. When you have a
system that says, you know, we're going to bring in
professional coaches make you better, and then you say the
best players, well, the best players are going to get
more attention. Then we're going to create a special league
for the best players. Well, then the kids that's not
that good. They ain't going.
Speaker 2 (50:17):
Right, You're not about development anymore.
Speaker 3 (50:20):
To back up to the title, right, our show is
we take a topic and we retrospectively look at and
a lot of it's from my book, but we we
can use other topics. But I think in this world
of TikTok and the news being this and that, boom
boom boom, boom boom, slow it down, pay attention, let's
(50:41):
look at the deeper aspect and the humanity. Right when
you watch the news, it's all these you know, terrible
things are good, but it's there's not the connection to
what really matters. Right. So in the book The Games
Do Count by Brian kill Me, our friend, great book,
people should get it. He doesn't look at the superstar
(51:05):
athlete per se. He looks about the successful person and
what their lack of athletic ability.
Speaker 2 (51:14):
Right. In some cases they were successful athletes, but they
all took lessons away. And there's sixty some odd you know,
Burt Reynolds, Gerald Ford, George Bush, Oliver North, James Brown, broadcaster.
Speaker 3 (51:28):
Well how about the one from his show that he
talks about Robin Williams. Right, right, so you know you
think of Robin Williams really deep dude and a very
good human.
Speaker 2 (51:38):
Not necessarily an athlete, right, But that.
Speaker 3 (51:41):
Was the key and what's the thing. He says, he
was the third midfield like.
Speaker 2 (51:45):
Guard tackle, we only played two midfield We only played
with two midfielders.
Speaker 3 (51:49):
Say that the right way?
Speaker 2 (51:50):
Well he I think he said I was the fourth midfielder.
And you know the only problem is our coach played
with you know, our team played with three midfielders. So
that's almost like the the old end guard tackle for
the football position. Will I sit at the end of
the bench, I guard the water bottle, and if anybody
comes near it and it's not authorized, I tackle him.
Speaker 3 (52:10):
That was your position?
Speaker 2 (52:11):
Yeah, yeah, that's why I didn't play football right, stuck
with soccer. But you know what what strikes me in
all of the conversations that we've had with Brian kill
me about you know, his book the tie into the
chapter of your book. And we mentioned the website. So
for those folks and when we talk about a topic,
make sure you pick up Sorry can't is a lie
(52:32):
by Arthur Lee. Today we're talking about the chapter that's
the same title as Brian's book, The Games Do Count.
Speaker 3 (52:39):
The book is these moments that have the deeper meaning.
And you know, faith in old leads are an interesting thing.
You have to have faith long enough for it to
pay off, right, and you have to get old enough
to realize that that happens. So the challenge we faced
with kind of educating our kids or trying to share
(52:59):
life experiences, you know, you have to get them to
believe in this mythical outcome of dedication commitment. And they say,
but when you're older, you approved it. So if you didn't,
you're gonna have issues that you should have. And if
you do, you're going to get the reward and understand.
So we have to transition generation from you know, we
(53:23):
used to watch back of white TV, and we used
to drive a car, and my dad watched the radio
and black of white TV and drove a car. Now
we TikTok and the car drives itself. It's a new world,
so we have a responsibility to try and view that.
Speaker 2 (53:36):
We're gonna talk more. We'll be back next week. I'm Rick.
I'm with Arthur Lee CEO and ventor of Life BacT
on The Man in the Arena.
Speaker 1 (53:45):
The proceeding was a paid podcast. iHeartRadio's hosting of this
podcast constitutes neither an endorsement of the products offered or
the ideas expressed
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