Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello, killing ash Hey. Tomorrow, April the second, Wednesday, getting
over the hump into a very good looking weekend, thankfully
here in South Carolina. All right, let's talk about some
stuff we can talk about tomorrow. And we got the
Disney on Ice kicking off Thursday night. That's the opening
night Thursday.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
That's right, that's what we're giving away tickets to. And
if you want to play our what you're talking about contest,
we'd like to give you the answer.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
Bella bone, bella bone, bella bone, bella bone, b E
L l.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
I b O n E.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Bella bone. That's between that was in the original song,
between the hip bone and the thigh bone.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
We all canell phone. They're connected to the.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
As as science and medical research advanced, they realized there
was no bella bone, so they.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Had misdiagnosed it in the original song. That's right. That's
a great guess. This is a very rare individual. It
is a woman who is stunningly beautiful but is also
a very good person. Oh that's why they call her
a rarity. Usually very attractive women are not good people.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
That is true, said the man who.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
Probably get pushback tomorrow. So you're a bell of bone.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
Yeah, that's a rarity.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
So it's what the description is? Rarity a woman who
is both stunningly beautiful and a good person.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
Okay, I like it. I've never heard it before. That's
a new word. Say, this is why we do the contest.
So you can expand your vocabulary and then use that word.
Be hard to use it three times tomorrow. The description
of women you're probably gonna meet.
Speaker 2 (01:55):
Well, you could maybe just keep saying it to your wife. Yes,
and because the first time she's gonna think you're insulting her.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
As typical.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
Here was such a belt of bone? The hell does
that mean?
Speaker 1 (02:07):
I gotta remember to use that? Oh that's good.
Speaker 2 (02:12):
We have all done it. Jonathan walked into a room,
and I know it happens more as you get older,
but you've walked into the room and you said to yourself,
why the hell am I here again? Why did I
come in here?
Speaker 1 (02:26):
Why did I What was it I came in here for?
And usually if I'm in the kitchen, I always pull
open the junk drawer because that means I was coming
in here to get something, and I don't.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
Keep anything in the kitchen. Maybe something to eat.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
You could have been something if it wasn't something to eat.
I know where those are. I'm not going to forget
where I hear those.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
Well. Neuroscientists Christian Jarrett's calls it the doorway effect, and
he says the doorway effect happens because the human brain
naturally compartment wises activities and information based on the rooms. Okay,
so your brain has like a memory as to why
(03:06):
did you enter the living room. It's to watch television.
Why did you enter the bedroom, It's to go to sleep.
So when you walk into a room kind of unexpectedly,
like you're like, oh, I got to go get that
tie to give to my nephew or something. Yes, and
then you kind of walk down the hallway, you're not
focusing on that getting the neck tie. You then walk
(03:27):
into the room. Your brain it just it's erased it,
it says. Researchers find that the brain files away events
and memories from one room to another as you go
into each and if you become distracted in any way,
your brain will just forget why you were there.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
That happens to me so often. You're right, it does
seem to happen to you more older you get. My
dad says that's one of the great drawbacks and the
absence of my mom being in the house and surpassing.
He said, you know, it's hard living by yourself because
when you go to find something, you've only got one
set of eyes, and you know you put it somewhere,
and you don't have anybody in the house to turn
(04:08):
to and go, hey, do you know where I put
my magnifying glass or whatever it is? You got somebody
else in the house with you. Now you got to
roam around till you find it.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
Well, if there's somebody else in the house, that's usually
I'm blaming them. Oh, I got you, where are the scissors?
I said, very accusa to It's.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
Like a dog memory. I mean dogs don't really that.
Dogs have a memory, but they don't have like a
history memory. They only recognize things and then know what
that thing. Like. If you say, get in your cage,
so the dog sees the cage, he knows getting the cage,
but he doesn't remember that every night about nine o'clock
we always go get in the cage.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
They don't. I've never heard this about the dogs.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
So they have a memory of incidents, not necessarily a
history that they can put together, and I don't know
a lot of it. May argue that because some people
tell me they get up in the morning and the
dog already sitting by the bowl, they know it's time
to eat.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
How would I mean? It's interesting to think, how would
researchers research that. You know, that's a great question, so
you don't get to ask them the question, do you
remember doing this last night? It's good, I was. I'm
gonna get I'll just be out there because it's on
the podcast. I'll just say it. I was shocked that
adult sites are not the most visited sites in the world.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
Oh that's changed.
Speaker 2 (05:31):
Visual Capitalists studied the most popular websites for their new report,
and how long did people on average visit each site.
One's taking a back seat, it's off the charts. Number
one is Google. Ten minutes forty seven seconds is the
average length there too, which is pretty long to be
(05:52):
on Google. YouTube is the most viewed site as far
as length. Average visit is twenty minutes forty seven seconds
to YouTube okay. Facebook's at three, Instagrams at four. X
is at five, although the time at X is much
higher than Instagram or Facebook okay, so it's almost thirteen
(06:13):
minutes is the average X visit, the other two at
about nine minutes. Chat GPT comes in at number seven.
Now Wikipedia is at eight, Reddit, which I never go to,
is it at nine? Yahoo? Is it ten? If you're
looking for the porn dan the number one is porn
(06:37):
hub and they come in at number nineteen. Wow, and
I'm also shocked. Average visit length is seven minutes and
twenty nine seconds.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
Hooray America, you're finally getting your gooding out of the
porn sites. We actually get something done today.
Speaker 2 (06:54):
We passed the law here in South Carolina which I'm
I would imagine his curtail visits to porn sites, and
that you have to prove your age.
Speaker 1 (07:05):
Now, really, how do I prove that?
Speaker 2 (07:08):
Well, that's the thing. A lot of people don't want
to prove it. So you've got to like upload your
ID into one of these things and then that once
it's confirmed, then you have access to the porn. But
you wouldn't upload your ID unless you wanted to go
see porn. And I think a lot of people are like,
I don't want to upload my ID. I just won't
(07:28):
watch porn. I bet that has Kirk hilled so I'm wondering.
I know that South Carolina was following the lead of
like trying to remember which state we had gotten that
bill from. But it was really to try to curb
children from seeing porn. But I bet it's also had
that other effect less people.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
Are popular chilling effect, Yes they call it.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
Yes, the government knows you're looking at porn. They always
knew you were looking at porn, but now it's really
now you know that they know for sure because you
had to upload your government an issued ID.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
Now I just have to live off the sophomore And
they post on the videos on the reels of Facebook.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
See what you can do? See see how long you
make it?
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Why why does that keep populating?
Speaker 2 (08:16):
Well, because you look at it. If they show you
a girl in a bikini and you look at it,
they know if you looked at it, they.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
Know I look at it for three seconds. That's what
I'm allowed.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Guaranteed. He doesn't scroll for three seconds.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
A small group three second, watch them.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Watch him. He will be here for three two one.
Now he scrolls, all right? So, uh, this came in
I want to say late this morning. It happened this morning.
Today is April fools, theay be careful out there, everybody. Uh.
This guy says, I played a prank that I saw
on Jimmy Kimmel. I thought it was really funny. I
(08:53):
thought I should do it to my wife. A prank
in question, is your car's backup camera? Uh? I printed
out a picture of Donald Trump. I positioned it on
the back of the car so that it would show
it looked like he was behind the car. When she
went into reverse, she screamed. It was hilarious. But now
(09:17):
she's angry, and so I don't know, like what am
I supposed to do. I thought it was a very
funny prank. She was not that amused. I mean, I
really just wanted to lighten up about this thing. So
at this point, Jonathan, is it just take your lumps?
Speaker 1 (09:36):
Is it?
Speaker 2 (09:37):
You push back on that and go There was no
chance of any harm happening here. You weren't going to
be in physically in any danger. You looked in your
rear view mirror and Donald Trump is standing there.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
Well, if she hated Trump, she'd just floor it, try
to run over it. She'd end up hitting a tree
or something.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
Okay, I'm assuming he knew that his wife was not
a murderer put a tesla in the back of the
rear view mirror, and she guns it, tries to destroy
the tesla. So I don't I don't know. I don't
play practical jokes, so.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
It's a big commitment to pull them off. Right.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
That's kind of funny that if you look in your
rear view mirror, they're not your mirror but your camera.
There's just Donald Trump. Kind of like I guess you'd
have to make it like a small version of Donald
Trump or something, and then you stick it off the
I don't even know. I'd have to see how Jimmy
Kimmel pulled it off.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
Let's use one of those selfie sticks, maybe come on
to give it a little distance. I don't know. I
don't know.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
But you go to back up, and I wonder if
the camera, because on my car it beeps if there's
something behind you, would it beep if there was a
cutout of Donald Trump. It's funny, and I don't know
that it's important that Donald Trump. I mean, you can
just put anybody back there, a celebrity, well, and tomorrow
we'll probably say no, you're not funny. Now you're putting
(11:06):
people's lives in danger. But if we just said a celebrity,
because for whatever reason, politicians are very whatever controversial will say.
They push people's buttons, so some people love them, some
people hate them. So we won't say Donald Trump's name tomorrow.
We'll just say a celebrity. One of her favorite celebrities
(11:27):
was back there. How's that one of her favorite celebrities
was in the rear view camera? And but now she's
angry that he did that to her.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
I don't know why that will make her angry. Plainly,
Donald Trump's not behind you. You got a review mirror,
You're in your garage. What are the chances that Donald
Trump's in your driveway?
Speaker 2 (11:53):
What if Donald Trump just happened to be in Irmo
nobody knew. He just happened to be back to his
little red high on Okay. Well, and maybe also people
will call them.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
With their uh yeah, I want to hear about the results.
Somebody got you? Who was it or who did you get?
It's always good to have a front. If you're going
to put off a really good practical joke, somebody taught
me how to do that. You got to you got
to put it in a context with someone that they
ultimately trust. If you're like a shady character, you've already
pulled off a couple of stunts. Now you got to
put it in the context where they would be in
(12:27):
an environment where you wouldn't be a part of the environment.
That that that's that dick takes even more planning. There's
a lot of planning involved in a great practical joke.
Speaker 2 (12:37):
Or maybe not.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
We'll find out maybe not when I'm reading Cole Spaghetti
over the shower curtain yesterday morning, during the middle of
your husband's or your wife's shower.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
The by the way, now that i'm reading it, she
hates Donald Trump, So.
Speaker 1 (12:53):
There you go.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
So uh, they used to do this praying all the time.
I don't do they even have community showers like for
kids anymore. Like like when I was in high school,
don't we all had to take a shower together. It
was like ten of us in there. It was like
a prison cell, and we're all in that thing. And
and I don't remember the first time I saw it,
(13:19):
but I know that it happened rather rather frequently. It
seemed like it was a once a month type of joke,
usually done on an underclassman, where when they were shampooing.
Somebody would then wait till they started rinsing, and then
they would put because their eyes are closed and they
(13:40):
don't feel it because the water is coming on their heads.
And that you could go through a whole bottle of
shampoo that day. Yeah, I mean, just get They're just like,
what the what is going on? It is like supply
some of them would start panicking after a while.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
It won't wash, that won't rint out.
Speaker 2 (13:58):
That's a that's a pretty safe prank if you if
you're in that type of position. But I don't even
know that people are in that position anymore, Like that's
not an opportunity because I don't know that they have group.
Speaker 1 (14:08):
I'm just ever big on the practical jokes in the
shower quite frankly. I mean, I just I was just
in there to get a shower and get out.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
Well, now that we're on the now that we're on
the the podcast here and nobody's you know, gonna call
me out to standards or whatever. In all honesty, I
thought I was being prank just now, Like ten minutes ago,
I was in the restroom, I'm walking in. Tumbleweed's walking out,
all right, he says, good morning, I say good morning.
(14:38):
I walked to the urinal yep. He was like, so,
how you doing? And I'm like I'm starting to unsit
my fly and I'm like I'm fine, and he just
wants to continue talking to me. And I'm like he's like,
so what are you working on? What are you what's happening?
And I'm like, I'm working opinion. I'm about to try
to urinate and he goes, oh, is it a bad time?
Like are you serious? But you want to have a conversation.
(15:01):
He's like, you know, I just don't get a chance
to see you very much. I just thought we could
kind of catch up. Like, dude, get out of here.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Stop. You remember now one of the product jokes I
hold in high school. I got called for this one.
I got my butt worn out for this one. But
good by again the excuse me?
Speaker 2 (15:18):
Not a guy?
Speaker 1 (15:18):
He was a doctor, if I remember correct?
Speaker 2 (15:20):
Oh not a guy.
Speaker 1 (15:21):
Oh yeah, he doctor Ray Reims. Wore my butt out.
You had to get there early before anybody used the
boys room because now all those little plastic sanitation things
are dry.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Are you talking about like the urinal cake?
Speaker 1 (15:38):
Yeah, the urinal cake, the big plastic ones with the
with the cake inside. All of those are dry because
nobody's flustered urinal since yesterday, So they're all dry. And
I've forgotten what the chemical was, where the chemical compound was,
but I got into the lab, I got a handful
of that, and I just put it all in the
in the urinals. And when that when that chemical compound
(15:58):
got wet, it started like fish and the smoke, and
so I put that in all four of them, and
then I got up in the stall, put my feet
up on the on the commode so they couldn't see
somebody was in the stall with the door closed. So
I was in the school early. And then the bell rang.
Then all the doors were over that all the men's
(16:21):
room gets flooded, not flooded, but there are enough guys
there to fill them all. So there was one person
to each one of them. And they all start peeing
at about the same time, and the smoke starts coming
up and they're all back.
Speaker 2 (16:35):
It was funny. Oh my gosh, John, Oh. They might
have thought that was nowadays every think it was a
terrorist attack, you know something.
Speaker 1 (16:43):
It's a good thing that I was raised in the
era where that was just as a practical joke. Now,
did I have permission to go into the lab and
get chemicals and bring them and put them into the
men's room. No, I don't know what kind of smoke
that would. I don't know if this got some kind
of adverse health effects. Didn't care give a damn.
Speaker 2 (17:02):
Did they have cameras in saluted back then like they
did today with the kids with the school buses, Sir,
I can't get away with even stealing a school bus
for a little while.
Speaker 1 (17:11):
Yeah, they got those guys on camera.
Speaker 2 (17:13):
Jonathan Rush had a much easier time.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
I did of the merriment, no cameras, and it was funny.
So then I got spied on because somebody saw that
I was in the closed door stall, so they knew
it was me. So then what happened, Well, it seems
(17:36):
like we got in the home room and that's when
somebody knocked at the door, and it was the principal,
mister Ray Reims.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
He had a great sense of humor. I bet he
just wanted to compliment you on your fine April fool's joke.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
So I so I got called out a home room
and then we went down to the principal's office.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
And that was laughter, and we laughed.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
Well he did.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
You should have seen the look on there.
Speaker 1 (18:02):
We got a kick out of it. Yeah, all right,
well I don't have to tell you where to grab
that desk. Oh, there you go?
Speaker 2 (18:12):
Is it just assume the position? Oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
He had one of those huge paddles with the holes
in it and down on the wind resistance.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Get a little whistle. Got a whistle while you work?
You could hear it coming whistle while I work. I'm
gonna get a little tune going here for you.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
How many I got to start the day? That's the
way you start the day right there at King Academy.
I really believe he tried to hit me until I howled.
I wouldn't howl.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
Oh you wanted you wanted to play tough guy? Yeah,
how was the tough guy? He will break you.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
I remember the one day in particular I had at
this point, and to my knowledge, I hold the record,
at this point the last period of the day, which
I think was sixth period, and I had done something
that I had gotten a little visit to the principal's
office every period that day. Okay, so it's like two
(19:14):
twenty in the afternoon, I've already gotten five visits to
the principal's office, gracious, and he came by and knocked
on the door of the sixth period and I looked
at him like, bro, can't be I am not doing
a damn thing. Yeah, and he said, you know something,
I need to see you anyway. I don't want you
(19:36):
to miss your opportunity. Not only the only student at
this school, you're the only student I've ever heard of
that came close to getting the spank in every period
of the day. So I want you to hold the record.
This won't take but a minute.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
I'm doing you a favor. There's your name on a
wall somewhere.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
I never got the plaque. I only get in the
brag about a lot of podcasts. I got one spanking
per period, I like I even got one for lunch.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
I don't think this guy liked you.
Speaker 1 (20:06):
Strangely enough, he did. We always got along famously, but inbearably.
Was that the whipping child? Was that the whipping boy
to the whipping posts? Okay, all right, enough about me tomorrow.
If you got a little April Fool's Day prank, or
if you just decided you're gonna go home and put
the picture of Donald Trump right behind the car there
(20:27):
somehow fix it U fixed.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
Well. I guess if you're if your car spouse hates
Donald Trump, I mean, or maybe your spouse hates Joe
Biden or Kamala Harri or whatever. I guess we could
make it a somebody you hate.
Speaker 1 (20:40):
Yeah, you're a Clemson fan, you put a picture of
a coach back there, or Dabo if you're a Carolina fan,
Dabo picture back there.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
I don't know that we have hate for those tunnel plays.
There are there coaches, you know what for like for
for us, we don't like the Kentucky coach. I've already
forgotten his name right now. They'll bring it up, but
you know that I'm talking about it. One mocks Carolina
his name. And I also don't like Brian Kelly because
he said after the LSU beat us last year, he said,
(21:08):
you Carolina fans are cute. You thought you could affect
the game? Haha, better try next time. Oh that guy,
You guys are cute, cuteute. We don't have any stadium
noise up there South Carolina.
Speaker 1 (21:24):
I have a fantasy of watching him shove his fat
face with a steak fall to the floor and then
I stay out loud. If only someone knew the Heimlich tragedy.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
That's cute.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
And turn a walk off, that's cute.
Speaker 2 (21:35):
The way you choke to death. Let him choke on
his words.
Speaker 1 (21:41):
Hey, what's going on in your neighborhood? How you going
to celebrate April Fools? If you've got a really good
one to hear about it tomorrow, we also give you
a chance to win at six thirty. What you're talking about,
you know the word, you know the answer I get
it is win the tickets for the opening night Disney
on Ice. And the number to do that it's the
same number we start talking, you start talking. It's eight
oh three nine seven eight nine two six tomorrow, the
second of April, on the morning Rush
Hello, killing ash Hey. Tomorrow, April the second, Wednesday, getting
over the hump into a very good looking weekend, thankfully
here in South Carolina. All right, let's talk about some
stuff we can talk about tomorrow. And we got the
Disney on Ice kicking off Thursday night. That's the opening
night Thursday.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
That's right, that's what we're giving away tickets to. And
if you want to play our what you're talking about contest,
we'd like to give you the answer.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
Bella bone, bella bone, bella bone, bella bone, b E
L l.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
I b O n E.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Bella bone. That's between that was in the original song,
between the hip bone and the thigh bone.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
We all canell phone. They're connected to the.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
As as science and medical research advanced, they realized there
was no bella bone, so they.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Had misdiagnosed it in the original song. That's right. That's
a great guess. This is a very rare individual. It
is a woman who is stunningly beautiful but is also
a very good person. Oh that's why they call her
a rarity. Usually very attractive women are not good people.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
That is true, said the man who.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
Probably get pushback tomorrow. So you're a bell of bone.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
Yeah, that's a rarity.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
So it's what the description is? Rarity a woman who
is both stunningly beautiful and a good person.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
Okay, I like it. I've never heard it before. That's
a new word. Say, this is why we do the contest.
So you can expand your vocabulary and then use that word.
Be hard to use it three times tomorrow. The description
of women you're probably gonna meet.
Speaker 2 (01:55):
Well, you could maybe just keep saying it to your wife. Yes,
and because the first time she's gonna think you're insulting her.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
As typical.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
Here was such a belt of bone? The hell does
that mean?
Speaker 1 (02:07):
I gotta remember to use that? Oh that's good.
Speaker 2 (02:12):
We have all done it. Jonathan walked into a room,
and I know it happens more as you get older,
but you've walked into the room and you said to yourself,
why the hell am I here again? Why did I
come in here?
Speaker 1 (02:26):
Why did I What was it I came in here for?
And usually if I'm in the kitchen, I always pull
open the junk drawer because that means I was coming
in here to get something, and I don't.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
Keep anything in the kitchen. Maybe something to eat.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
You could have been something if it wasn't something to eat.
I know where those are. I'm not going to forget
where I hear those.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
Well. Neuroscientists Christian Jarrett's calls it the doorway effect, and
he says the doorway effect happens because the human brain
naturally compartment wises activities and information based on the rooms. Okay,
so your brain has like a memory as to why
(03:06):
did you enter the living room. It's to watch television.
Why did you enter the bedroom, It's to go to sleep.
So when you walk into a room kind of unexpectedly,
like you're like, oh, I got to go get that
tie to give to my nephew or something. Yes, and
then you kind of walk down the hallway, you're not
focusing on that getting the neck tie. You then walk
(03:27):
into the room. Your brain it just it's erased it,
it says. Researchers find that the brain files away events
and memories from one room to another as you go
into each and if you become distracted in any way,
your brain will just forget why you were there.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
That happens to me so often. You're right, it does
seem to happen to you more older you get. My
dad says that's one of the great drawbacks and the
absence of my mom being in the house and surpassing.
He said, you know, it's hard living by yourself because
when you go to find something, you've only got one
set of eyes, and you know you put it somewhere,
and you don't have anybody in the house to turn
(04:08):
to and go, hey, do you know where I put
my magnifying glass or whatever it is? You got somebody
else in the house with you. Now you got to
roam around till you find it.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
Well, if there's somebody else in the house, that's usually
I'm blaming them. Oh, I got you, where are the scissors?
I said, very accusa to It's.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
Like a dog memory. I mean dogs don't really that.
Dogs have a memory, but they don't have like a
history memory. They only recognize things and then know what
that thing. Like. If you say, get in your cage,
so the dog sees the cage, he knows getting the cage,
but he doesn't remember that every night about nine o'clock
we always go get in the cage.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
They don't. I've never heard this about the dogs.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
So they have a memory of incidents, not necessarily a
history that they can put together, and I don't know
a lot of it. May argue that because some people
tell me they get up in the morning and the
dog already sitting by the bowl, they know it's time
to eat.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
How would I mean? It's interesting to think, how would
researchers research that. You know, that's a great question, so
you don't get to ask them the question, do you
remember doing this last night? It's good, I was. I'm
gonna get I'll just be out there because it's on
the podcast. I'll just say it. I was shocked that
adult sites are not the most visited sites in the world.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
Oh that's changed.
Speaker 2 (05:31):
Visual Capitalists studied the most popular websites for their new report,
and how long did people on average visit each site.
One's taking a back seat, it's off the charts. Number
one is Google. Ten minutes forty seven seconds is the
average length there too, which is pretty long to be
(05:52):
on Google. YouTube is the most viewed site as far
as length. Average visit is twenty minutes forty seven seconds
to YouTube okay. Facebook's at three, Instagrams at four. X
is at five, although the time at X is much
higher than Instagram or Facebook okay, so it's almost thirteen
(06:13):
minutes is the average X visit, the other two at
about nine minutes. Chat GPT comes in at number seven.
Now Wikipedia is at eight, Reddit, which I never go to,
is it at nine? Yahoo? Is it ten? If you're
looking for the porn dan the number one is porn
(06:37):
hub and they come in at number nineteen. Wow, and
I'm also shocked. Average visit length is seven minutes and
twenty nine seconds.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
Hooray America, you're finally getting your gooding out of the
porn sites. We actually get something done today.
Speaker 2 (06:54):
We passed the law here in South Carolina which I'm
I would imagine his curtail visits to porn sites, and
that you have to prove your age.
Speaker 1 (07:05):
Now, really, how do I prove that?
Speaker 2 (07:08):
Well, that's the thing. A lot of people don't want
to prove it. So you've got to like upload your
ID into one of these things and then that once
it's confirmed, then you have access to the porn. But
you wouldn't upload your ID unless you wanted to go
see porn. And I think a lot of people are like,
I don't want to upload my ID. I just won't
(07:28):
watch porn. I bet that has Kirk hilled so I'm wondering.
I know that South Carolina was following the lead of
like trying to remember which state we had gotten that
bill from. But it was really to try to curb
children from seeing porn. But I bet it's also had
that other effect less people.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
Are popular chilling effect, Yes they call it.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
Yes, the government knows you're looking at porn. They always
knew you were looking at porn, but now it's really
now you know that they know for sure because you
had to upload your government an issued ID.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
Now I just have to live off the sophomore And
they post on the videos on the reels of Facebook.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
See what you can do? See see how long you
make it?
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Why why does that keep populating?
Speaker 2 (08:16):
Well, because you look at it. If they show you
a girl in a bikini and you look at it,
they know if you looked at it, they.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
Know I look at it for three seconds. That's what
I'm allowed.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Guaranteed. He doesn't scroll for three seconds.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
A small group three second, watch them.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Watch him. He will be here for three two one.
Now he scrolls, all right? So, uh, this came in
I want to say late this morning. It happened this morning.
Today is April fools, theay be careful out there, everybody. Uh.
This guy says, I played a prank that I saw
on Jimmy Kimmel. I thought it was really funny. I
(08:53):
thought I should do it to my wife. A prank
in question, is your car's backup camera? Uh? I printed
out a picture of Donald Trump. I positioned it on
the back of the car so that it would show
it looked like he was behind the car. When she
went into reverse, she screamed. It was hilarious. But now
(09:17):
she's angry, and so I don't know, like what am
I supposed to do. I thought it was a very
funny prank. She was not that amused. I mean, I
really just wanted to lighten up about this thing. So
at this point, Jonathan, is it just take your lumps?
Speaker 1 (09:36):
Is it?
Speaker 2 (09:37):
You push back on that and go There was no
chance of any harm happening here. You weren't going to
be in physically in any danger. You looked in your
rear view mirror and Donald Trump is standing there.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
Well, if she hated Trump, she'd just floor it, try
to run over it. She'd end up hitting a tree
or something.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
Okay, I'm assuming he knew that his wife was not
a murderer put a tesla in the back of the
rear view mirror, and she guns it, tries to destroy
the tesla. So I don't I don't know. I don't
play practical jokes, so.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
It's a big commitment to pull them off. Right.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
That's kind of funny that if you look in your
rear view mirror, they're not your mirror but your camera.
There's just Donald Trump. Kind of like I guess you'd
have to make it like a small version of Donald
Trump or something, and then you stick it off the
I don't even know. I'd have to see how Jimmy
Kimmel pulled it off.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
Let's use one of those selfie sticks, maybe come on
to give it a little distance. I don't know. I
don't know.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
But you go to back up, and I wonder if
the camera, because on my car it beeps if there's
something behind you, would it beep if there was a
cutout of Donald Trump. It's funny, and I don't know
that it's important that Donald Trump. I mean, you can
just put anybody back there, a celebrity, well, and tomorrow
we'll probably say no, you're not funny. Now you're putting
(11:06):
people's lives in danger. But if we just said a celebrity,
because for whatever reason, politicians are very whatever controversial will say.
They push people's buttons, so some people love them, some
people hate them. So we won't say Donald Trump's name tomorrow.
We'll just say a celebrity. One of her favorite celebrities
(11:27):
was back there. How's that one of her favorite celebrities
was in the rear view camera? And but now she's
angry that he did that to her.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
I don't know why that will make her angry. Plainly,
Donald Trump's not behind you. You got a review mirror,
You're in your garage. What are the chances that Donald
Trump's in your driveway?
Speaker 2 (11:53):
What if Donald Trump just happened to be in Irmo
nobody knew. He just happened to be back to his
little red high on Okay. Well, and maybe also people
will call them.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
With their uh yeah, I want to hear about the results.
Somebody got you? Who was it or who did you get?
It's always good to have a front. If you're going
to put off a really good practical joke, somebody taught
me how to do that. You got to you got
to put it in a context with someone that they
ultimately trust. If you're like a shady character, you've already
pulled off a couple of stunts. Now you got to
put it in the context where they would be in
(12:27):
an environment where you wouldn't be a part of the environment.
That that that's that dick takes even more planning. There's
a lot of planning involved in a great practical joke.
Speaker 2 (12:37):
Or maybe not.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
We'll find out maybe not when I'm reading Cole Spaghetti
over the shower curtain yesterday morning, during the middle of
your husband's or your wife's shower.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
The by the way, now that i'm reading it, she
hates Donald Trump, So.
Speaker 1 (12:53):
There you go.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
So uh, they used to do this praying all the time.
I don't do they even have community showers like for
kids anymore. Like like when I was in high school,
don't we all had to take a shower together. It
was like ten of us in there. It was like
a prison cell, and we're all in that thing. And
and I don't remember the first time I saw it,
(13:19):
but I know that it happened rather rather frequently. It
seemed like it was a once a month type of joke,
usually done on an underclassman, where when they were shampooing.
Somebody would then wait till they started rinsing, and then
they would put because their eyes are closed and they
(13:40):
don't feel it because the water is coming on their heads.
And that you could go through a whole bottle of
shampoo that day. Yeah, I mean, just get They're just like,
what the what is going on? It is like supply
some of them would start panicking after a while.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
It won't wash, that won't rint out.
Speaker 2 (13:58):
That's a that's a pretty safe prank if you if
you're in that type of position. But I don't even
know that people are in that position anymore, Like that's
not an opportunity because I don't know that they have group.
Speaker 1 (14:08):
I'm just ever big on the practical jokes in the
shower quite frankly. I mean, I just I was just
in there to get a shower and get out.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
Well, now that we're on the now that we're on
the the podcast here and nobody's you know, gonna call
me out to standards or whatever. In all honesty, I
thought I was being prank just now, Like ten minutes ago,
I was in the restroom, I'm walking in. Tumbleweed's walking out,
all right, he says, good morning, I say good morning.
(14:38):
I walked to the urinal yep. He was like, so,
how you doing? And I'm like I'm starting to unsit
my fly and I'm like I'm fine, and he just
wants to continue talking to me. And I'm like he's like,
so what are you working on? What are you what's happening?
And I'm like, I'm working opinion. I'm about to try
to urinate and he goes, oh, is it a bad time?
Like are you serious? But you want to have a conversation.
(15:01):
He's like, you know, I just don't get a chance
to see you very much. I just thought we could
kind of catch up. Like, dude, get out of here.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Stop. You remember now one of the product jokes I
hold in high school. I got called for this one.
I got my butt worn out for this one. But
good by again the excuse me?
Speaker 2 (15:18):
Not a guy?
Speaker 1 (15:18):
He was a doctor, if I remember correct?
Speaker 2 (15:20):
Oh not a guy.
Speaker 1 (15:21):
Oh yeah, he doctor Ray Reims. Wore my butt out.
You had to get there early before anybody used the
boys room because now all those little plastic sanitation things
are dry.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Are you talking about like the urinal cake?
Speaker 1 (15:38):
Yeah, the urinal cake, the big plastic ones with the
with the cake inside. All of those are dry because
nobody's flustered urinal since yesterday, So they're all dry. And
I've forgotten what the chemical was, where the chemical compound was,
but I got into the lab, I got a handful
of that, and I just put it all in the
in the urinals. And when that when that chemical compound
(15:58):
got wet, it started like fish and the smoke, and
so I put that in all four of them, and
then I got up in the stall, put my feet
up on the on the commode so they couldn't see
somebody was in the stall with the door closed. So
I was in the school early. And then the bell rang.
Then all the doors were over that all the men's
(16:21):
room gets flooded, not flooded, but there are enough guys
there to fill them all. So there was one person
to each one of them. And they all start peeing
at about the same time, and the smoke starts coming
up and they're all back.
Speaker 2 (16:35):
It was funny. Oh my gosh, John, Oh. They might
have thought that was nowadays every think it was a
terrorist attack, you know something.
Speaker 1 (16:43):
It's a good thing that I was raised in the
era where that was just as a practical joke. Now,
did I have permission to go into the lab and
get chemicals and bring them and put them into the
men's room. No, I don't know what kind of smoke
that would. I don't know if this got some kind
of adverse health effects. Didn't care give a damn.
Speaker 2 (17:02):
Did they have cameras in saluted back then like they
did today with the kids with the school buses, Sir,
I can't get away with even stealing a school bus
for a little while.
Speaker 1 (17:11):
Yeah, they got those guys on camera.
Speaker 2 (17:13):
Jonathan Rush had a much easier time.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
I did of the merriment, no cameras, and it was funny.
So then I got spied on because somebody saw that
I was in the closed door stall, so they knew
it was me. So then what happened, Well, it seems
(17:36):
like we got in the home room and that's when
somebody knocked at the door, and it was the principal,
mister Ray Reims.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
He had a great sense of humor. I bet he
just wanted to compliment you on your fine April fool's joke.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
So I so I got called out a home room
and then we went down to the principal's office.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
And that was laughter, and we laughed.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
Well he did.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
You should have seen the look on there.
Speaker 1 (18:02):
We got a kick out of it. Yeah, all right,
well I don't have to tell you where to grab
that desk. Oh, there you go?
Speaker 2 (18:12):
Is it just assume the position? Oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
He had one of those huge paddles with the holes
in it and down on the wind resistance.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Get a little whistle. Got a whistle while you work?
You could hear it coming whistle while I work. I'm
gonna get a little tune going here for you.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
How many I got to start the day? That's the
way you start the day right there at King Academy.
I really believe he tried to hit me until I howled.
I wouldn't howl.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
Oh you wanted you wanted to play tough guy? Yeah,
how was the tough guy? He will break you.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
I remember the one day in particular I had at
this point, and to my knowledge, I hold the record,
at this point the last period of the day, which
I think was sixth period, and I had done something
that I had gotten a little visit to the principal's
office every period that day. Okay, so it's like two
(19:14):
twenty in the afternoon, I've already gotten five visits to
the principal's office, gracious, and he came by and knocked
on the door of the sixth period and I looked
at him like, bro, can't be I am not doing
a damn thing. Yeah, and he said, you know something,
I need to see you anyway. I don't want you
(19:36):
to miss your opportunity. Not only the only student at
this school, you're the only student I've ever heard of
that came close to getting the spank in every period
of the day. So I want you to hold the record.
This won't take but a minute.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
I'm doing you a favor. There's your name on a
wall somewhere.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
I never got the plaque. I only get in the
brag about a lot of podcasts. I got one spanking
per period, I like I even got one for lunch.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
I don't think this guy liked you.
Speaker 1 (20:06):
Strangely enough, he did. We always got along famously, but inbearably.
Was that the whipping child? Was that the whipping boy
to the whipping posts? Okay, all right, enough about me tomorrow.
If you got a little April Fool's Day prank, or
if you just decided you're gonna go home and put
the picture of Donald Trump right behind the car there
(20:27):
somehow fix it U fixed.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
Well. I guess if you're if your car spouse hates
Donald Trump, I mean, or maybe your spouse hates Joe
Biden or Kamala Harri or whatever. I guess we could
make it a somebody you hate.
Speaker 1 (20:40):
Yeah, you're a Clemson fan, you put a picture of
a coach back there, or Dabo if you're a Carolina fan,
Dabo picture back there.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
I don't know that we have hate for those tunnel plays.
There are there coaches, you know what for like for
for us, we don't like the Kentucky coach. I've already
forgotten his name right now. They'll bring it up, but
you know that I'm talking about it. One mocks Carolina
his name. And I also don't like Brian Kelly because
he said after the LSU beat us last year, he said,
(21:08):
you Carolina fans are cute. You thought you could affect
the game? Haha, better try next time. Oh that guy,
You guys are cute, cuteute. We don't have any stadium
noise up there South Carolina.
Speaker 1 (21:24):
I have a fantasy of watching him shove his fat
face with a steak fall to the floor and then
I stay out loud. If only someone knew the Heimlich tragedy.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
That's cute.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
And turn a walk off, that's cute.
Speaker 2 (21:35):
The way you choke to death. Let him choke on
his words.
Speaker 1 (21:41):
Hey, what's going on in your neighborhood? How you going
to celebrate April Fools? If you've got a really good
one to hear about it tomorrow, we also give you
a chance to win at six thirty. What you're talking about,
you know the word, you know the answer I get
it is win the tickets for the opening night Disney
on Ice. And the number to do that it's the
same number we start talking, you start talking. It's eight
oh three nine seven eight nine two six tomorrow, the
second of April, on the morning Rush
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