Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
So when will we find out the results of the
Colorado walkway decision from polis? And it looked like a
simple Google survey form, so that means the statistics should
have been ready at twelve or one am. I bet
if it didn't go his way, we're not going to
(00:22):
hear about it for a while.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Interesting. Oh, by the way, Michael Brown nos a key.
He's not feeling well.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
The poor bastard actually decided to show up today, sat
in the control room with his head in his hands
for about ten minutes, looks up at me and goes.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Ding our own thing. I can do this today? As
you call dev.
Speaker 3 (00:57):
Well, you look and sound like crap. So yeah, we
can to do something.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Okay, feel really really bad. He's probably listening on on
his way home. So let me let me just uh,
you know, there's one thing coming to work, oh drunk,
and then there's another one just coming to work that hungover,
really brownie, really.
Speaker 4 (01:24):
So unprofessional. Tequila to some is delicious.
Speaker 5 (01:29):
I don't know what's going on. I keep drinking more
and more medicine. I just don't feel better. I'm not
getting any better any better. Doctor my bartender's named doctor.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
Doctor. Can I get another, a little more medicine here, please,
thank you.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
So he really did try to come in and do
the job today, but it just it was disgusting.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
It is so quintessentially God I to do to do
what Brownie did. Brownie, I I feel your My quick story,
I'm I'm driving to work. I live in Boulder. I
work in Denver at the Independence Institute. Check us out
at thinkfreedom dot org. Thinkfreedom dot org. And and I'm
(02:19):
not feeling right. You know, you're just not feeling right.
I'm not feeling right. And then kinda kind of feel
more not right, and I kind of feel this weird
tightness in my chest.
Speaker 4 (02:29):
And I'm like, I don't know what's going on.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
And then it finally hits me. I'm having a panic attack.
This is what a panic attack. I've I've heard people
saying panic attack or something. And I gotta, I gotta,
I gotta get to work because I'm I'm running a
meeting in heaven forbid, a meeting not happened, you know,
without me there to run it. And and so I'm
(02:57):
driving to work and it gets worse and worse and worse,
and I'm thinking, man, I can see why people freak
out about panic attacks. Now, this is this is bad,
bad stuff. And then it hits me, what if it's
not a panic attack, what if I'm having like some
(03:17):
heart trouble. Well, I still got to do the meeting,
and so I'm just gonna go to work. And then
I make a very good decision. I called my brother.
I said, you know, have you ever felt this way,
this this thing that's happening to me?
Speaker 4 (03:32):
And he said, ah, yeah, that happened to me once.
Turned out to be a panic attack. Don't worry about it.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
And I said, yeah, all right, it'll pass. You'll be
fine one way or the other. It'll pass. So why
don't you just why don't you just you know? But
also I say, hey, can you stand the line? Yeah,
I'll stand the line. I'm driving to work. It's not
getting better, it's not getting better, but I got to
do this this meeting. It's just, you know, partly a
(03:58):
zoom meeting. And and then my brother comes up with
this brilliant idea and says, and I quote, hey, why
don't you, you know, just in case you're having some
real problem, go go to the emergency room, just hang
out in the waiting room and you know, do your
zoom call from there, and you'll look really butch, you
(04:19):
know how cool. Yeah, I'm having chest pains, but I'm
I'm doing it from the.
Speaker 4 (04:24):
Hospital because this meeting is so important.
Speaker 2 (04:27):
That's brilliant. So I drive myself from almost from Boulder
all the way to to Denver General. I don't know
why what do they call it now? Denver healthy? Old
people call them by the old names. And and well,
long story short, Yeah, I'm having a friggin heart attack.
(04:49):
They called widow maker vein. Actually, nobody in the hospital
calls it the widow maker artery. It's the artery on
the outside of your on the outside of your heart
is ninety percent block and uh and and they they
they fixed me up. Ask them afterwards, what would have
(05:09):
happened if I if I went to work, you would
have died. But you know, other than that, everything major.
And it was really it was really a fifty to
fifty thing. At the very end of whether or not
I should go into the hospital or not, I would
not be here sitting in for Brownie, which by the way,
(05:30):
I enjoy doing. If it wasn't you, which I enjoy
getting paid for. Here you go that's much better because
you've got to be awake at this.
Speaker 4 (05:40):
Time, which sucks a god no, and.
Speaker 2 (05:45):
Yeah, this is this is just an awful I'm not
a morning person, so you know, I don't think I'm
awake yet, so this is part of the dream I'm having.
Point being, Guys do not go to the doctor. We
just don't do. And women are like, why don't you
go to the doctor. We don't go to the doctor
because going to the doctor just sucks.
Speaker 3 (06:10):
We've been defeated by a lousy virus or bug or well,
it's an attact. It's more than just defeat.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
I mean, when you live my life, defeat is you know,
a standard operating procedure. It's it's that feeling. You know,
that feeling when you're holding your wife's or girlfriend's purse
while she's in the dressing room trying on fifteen things
and you're just standing there for five hours. That is
(06:39):
the feeling of going to the doctor. And we we
hate that feeling. It's like you're waiting in the waiting room.
You're waiting in the little room, you're filling out forms,
and no matter what he or she tells you, they
just send you to somebody else to do the same thing,
and then they send you to somebody else do the
(07:00):
same thing, and then they send you to something else
to do. And it's like, no, no, I'd rather have
a nice, honorable, quiet death in the K House studios
as I'm dying from whatever it is Brownie was dying of.
I think that's the reason guys don't go it. Going
(07:21):
to the doctor stinks. Now, it's better now that you know,
eighty percent of all doctors are women, and in ten
years it'll be ninety percent. The statistics are ridiculous on that.
It's just ridiculous that college now is very female dominated.
(07:42):
Men don't go to college, or should I say boys
don't go to college as much anymore. I think it's
because it's been really feminized and just stinks, and so
guys are like, no, not gonna do it. In the
same way that guys don't go to the doctor. It's
the same thing not doing it, not gone. That's my sense.
So at least right now, let me think, yeah, yeah,
(08:06):
cardiologist is a chick. My primary care doctor is a chick.
Speaker 4 (08:10):
Uh No, I's all one.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
One, dude. But it's it's amazing and I don't think
it's a it's a bad thing. It's except you know
you you can't tell as many dirty jokes in the
in the exam room. They apparently don't like that. But
other than that, female doctors, how to put it, they
(08:36):
they're a little bit more empathetic. I I I've never
had a female doctor. Eh, just walk it off. It's
just just a heart attack. Well, anyway, Brownie, I hope,
I hope you're feeling better. U can't move, all right?
I After everything I just said, let's just spend a
(08:59):
moment talking about the real issue that that men have,
the one issue that men will seek help for. They
will ask for help. You hear it all the time
on all the ads on talk radio. Yeah, I'm talking
about the man cold. Oh god, not a rectile dysfunction,
(09:23):
that's that's old news. No, it's the man cold. You
know what I'm talking about, the man called. Women have
no sense of how debilitating the man cold is. Now,
whatever Brownie has it probably just man cold. The man
cold is just a regular head cold. Most men will
(09:47):
just show up to work, not complain. They lop off
an arm or a leg, they got stage four cancer
of the thumb.
Speaker 4 (09:54):
They don't care. They'll just whap it off.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
They'll still just go And it's just a scratch, scratch,
it's a flesh wound. And that's just the way men
are until it happens to the to the man cold. Now,
women who are generally speaking very I don't know how
(10:16):
to put it empathetic, they understand, they care that they
have no sympathy for what a man goes through with
a man cold, that it is a life or death situation. Now,
according to the New England Journal of Medicine, a man
(10:37):
cold is at least ten times more painful than childbirth.
You know this is you know what it's like. You're
laying on the bed and the remote control is just
a few inches away, and you can't really roll over
to get it. You have to call your girlfriend or
(10:59):
wife for somebody over to bring it to you.
Speaker 4 (11:02):
Why man cold?
Speaker 2 (11:05):
That's it?
Speaker 4 (11:06):
Man cold? You know it's uh and you need.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
Someone to kiss your forehead and say, what are they doing this?
Get there there, little bunny and bring you fluids and
patch your cheek and tuck you in. That is the
only thing that will help a man cold. A man
cold will take you out. Now, I think about this women.
(11:36):
Women talk all about how bad childbirth is, and we
have this whole system to help women through childbirth because
currently it is slightly uncomfortable or something. But we don't
have any apparatus for the man cold. We don't, we don't,
(11:58):
we don't have the the we don't have maternity leave
for man cold. Nothing. And listen, women don't like being
there when you have man cold. My former wife had
three children, three I was there for each one of
(12:20):
those berths, and everything seems so centered around well, you
know her, not about you know, my needs. They're out there.
All she did was complain, you know, I'm in pain,
my water broke, I want an epidural. In the meantime,
(12:45):
Nobody in the delivering room offered me a beer or
even a comfortable charity sit in. Didn't ask if I
wanted to watch ESPN. Nothing.
Speaker 4 (12:54):
It was like it was all about her.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
Good God now, and I took it. I took it
in stride. You know, all right, you know fine, this
is this is you know, apparently she's going through you
know something. But then when a man cold strikes, which
is scientifically ten times more painful than giving childbirth. It's
(13:24):
science has been science has been settled on it. There
is no more debate. Don't be don't be a man
cold denier. You know. Then women are like, you just
have a cold. What do you mean I did. I
was there for you when you had childbirth. I've got
the sniffles. Now where's my support system? Can I get
(13:50):
an amen to that from them?
Speaker 3 (13:51):
And here's the other thing too, about women in giving birth.
They choose. You know, some women is like, I want
to have another baby. No man sits there and goes,
I want to have another man called it doesn't happen.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
So, you know, childbirth might not be that bad. Especially
can't be that bad. I want a baby, Yeah, I
want another baby. You know men, men don't like paying
for a new car, but we'll go and buy a
new car because we want the new car so much.
Speaker 4 (14:23):
Yeah, childbirth cannot be that bad.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
If if women decide to do it again and again,
no man chooses a man cold again, true science. That
is science, boys and girls. Nobody can argue with that
kind of science. You know, we have not we have
(14:48):
not done enough men cold education. We don't have a campaign,
We don't really have a five oh one c three charity.
Speaker 4 (14:58):
We don't have a telethon. We don't. I don't even
think we have a ribbon?
Speaker 2 (15:03):
Do we have? A man cold does not even have
a ribbon. But yet there are entire stores based on
buying things women want when they have babies. I mean
just arbitrary things like baby strollers and baby buggies and
(15:24):
a changing table and a crib, crib crib what like that.
You know, the dog sleeps on the floor. What your
baby can't sleep on the floor? What? You know, until
it's verbal, it can't complain, so you know why not?
So even this, it won't even roll over. So it's fine,
You're fine. You can keep it in your kitchen drawer somewhere.
(15:46):
It's it's a baby, you know. And then you know,
breast pumps that look like some sort of weird hookah.
All these things, you know for a woman. But when
a man has a man cold, there's there's there's no
man cold shower, there's no man called stores, there's no
(16:08):
magazines about it. You know, this is the silent killer.
This is the silent killer because men are too proud
to come out and say I survived a man cold.
Oh yeah. They go to therapy and you know, have PTSD.
(16:28):
You know, they're right there with the Vietnam VET. You
know they're in the same circle going, Oh, man, I've
seen some stuff. I've seen some stuff. Yeah, I was
really tired and my nose got really red and I
couldn't reach the remote control. And you know, the brothers
are all hugging each other. But it's all in shame
because you're not allowed to talk about the man cold.
(16:52):
This is.
Speaker 4 (16:54):
So Michael Brown has a man cold.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
Brother. We are there for you, We are there for you,
and we need some sort of support tree, We need
some sort of you know, you go to church and
stead of like and let's pray for those in our
congregation who are struggling with health issues. Michael Brown has
a man cold. And you hear the murmurs, Oh, not
a man cold. Oh I got not a man cold.
(17:20):
He almost died, He almost died. He almost died. Man,
what about his family? Oh can you imagine his family
is going through he's got a man cold.
Speaker 4 (17:28):
I think of his children and grandchildren. How does he
explain it to the grandkids.
Speaker 2 (17:35):
You know, there's no there's no memorial to a man cold.
Speaker 4 (17:40):
There is a memorial to women in Vietnam.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
There's a memorial for women who served in Vietnam, nurses
who served in Vietnam. There's no memorial for man cold survivors.
We live in silent. It is time we do something
about this. That we're here. We survived a man cold,
(18:07):
and and we will not be forgotten.
Speaker 4 (18:14):
I had a madden cold, and it was I thought
I was gonna die.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Man, I was gonna die three three seven one, three
eighty five, eighty five e two together for a two
five five. There we go eight two five five. Let's
let's let's bring it together for Brownie.
Speaker 6 (18:36):
Shall we please let me know what DEI doctor made up?
Man cold? First time I've heard it, and hopefully the last.
Have a nice day sunny here in northern New York.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
You've never heard the term man cold, man cold? It
It is a traditional term. It is a medical term
that came from the Journal of American Medicine and whiny men.
You know what a man cold is. It's it's it's
(19:21):
when you a man have a cold and you hate it.
Speaker 4 (19:25):
It's a man cold.
Speaker 2 (19:27):
I'm John Caldera in for the ailing man cold struck
Michael Brown. Come on, you've had the man cold. Go
to YouTube type in man cold. I forget which group
did a spectacular skid about it. The husband's laying on
(19:48):
the couch, going, oh, there you are, wifey. You weren't
there and I yelled for you, I said, Jennifer, but
you didn't come. So so I called nine one one.
Well what I couldn't reach the remote, and you know,
(20:13):
the guys come from nine to one to one. The
medics come rushing in. You know what happened? Oh, my god,
And the wife says, he he just has a cold.
My God's sake, woman, he doesn't just have a cold.
He has a man cold. Well I've got a cold too,
says the wife. He ain't killed too. Don't you understand, woman,
(20:37):
it's not a regular cold.
Speaker 4 (20:39):
He has a man cold.
Speaker 3 (20:40):
Oh, even straight from WebMD here, I'm just looking at this.
Some experts say men and women may in fact respond
differently to colds. Some king some studies say men have
more symptoms than women when they get colds.
Speaker 2 (20:58):
It's a thing. So it's a real thing. Women, it's
it's worse than giving birth. You need to be there
for your man. I'm hoping missus Brown is out there kissing.
Speaker 4 (21:14):
His forehead going, poor little baby.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
No, I'm gonna stay with you through the whole thing.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
That's what a man needs during a man Even here
WebMD it continues to say the female sex hormone estrogen,
slows down how fast a virus multiplies. This may lead
to fewer symptoms. The flu virus may not spread as
quickly in women because of the estrogen and how the
female body reacts to it. Studies have shown that the
(21:40):
same thing applies to the cold virus. Studies have not
shown the same thing. Yeah, so, yeah, apparently women they
don't get as sick as men. This is straight women
dot com Cold and flu. I was just making up
this crap, but right, it is real.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
This is great science. Man, Science finally comes to help me.
That's I'm going to frame that. Put it, put it
above me when I'm sick.
Speaker 3 (22:16):
As I'm reading this, part of the brain that controls
body temperature is larger in men because of testosterone. This
may lead to higher fevers in men than in women.
Speaker 4 (22:29):
Oh my god, where the victim?
Speaker 2 (22:34):
Do you understand this?
Speaker 4 (22:35):
We are the victim. Where's our march?
Speaker 2 (22:41):
Where is our where's our charity bike ride? Where? Where's
the Foundation for man cold research. This is this is
just wrong. This is sexism. You know what that is.
It's just sexism women, you know. And the only treatment,
(23:03):
I'm sure if you read on in that web Md
story and look at the only treatment for man cold
is to have a good woman by your side, kissing
your forehead, saying, they're there, poor bunny. Let me get
you some more orange juice. That's it. That's the only
(23:23):
thing that will that will help. It's science. Man.
Speaker 4 (23:28):
If you cannot argue with science.
Speaker 2 (23:30):
What are you a denier? Oh, poor brownie, he's got
he's got a man cold. So I I this happened.
I don't know, ten years ago or something. I got
a man I mean, I'm real man cold. I was
out for like three weeks. I just could not move,
and I kept going to the doctor and everywhere I
(23:54):
went I was like, yeah, you got a cold, you
just need more rest. I couldn't move like three weeks.
Now that's a man cold. But no sympathy, no sympathy.
My daughter at the time, she was living at my house.
She looked at me and said, eh, you got a
(24:16):
man cold, and she just turned and walked away. The cruelty.
I still have to see his shrink over this three
sessions a week to get over the shame that society
gives man with when he has a man cold. There
you go.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
Now, men, by the way, still go to work and yeah,
like Michael's dumbass actually showed up today and he's got
a man cold.
Speaker 2 (24:43):
And he's got a man cold. We told him to
go house. But still guys will go to work and
ripsaw off one of their fingers and go and still
stay at work. Where's the super cool you got the
duct tape? Yeah? Anybody?
Speaker 4 (24:59):
Because we're stupid men.
Speaker 2 (25:02):
But when we have a man cold, man, the world stops,
and it should stop. There is nothing, there is nothing
worse than a man called oll. If women could understand
women childbirth times ten, that's what a man cold is.
That's all. That's all we just need.
Speaker 4 (25:21):
We just need a little sympathy, some kisses.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
We don't need any flowers. We just need you to
help us with the remote control. And you have to
stay with us. Why we watch the die hard marathon?
That's all. Is that so much to ask, you know?
And then after that both Godfather one and Godfather two,
(25:48):
and please, ladies, never think that we need to watch
Godfather three. Never a good woman will and you have
to sit there and listen to.
Speaker 4 (26:00):
Us explain the beauty of.
Speaker 2 (26:02):
Godfather one and Godfather to to you while we have
a man cold and you have to look like you're
very interested, that's all. Is it really that hard? And
and when do we get a man cold every every
fifteen years? It's not very other week, every every other week.
Speaker 4 (26:22):
I don't know, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (26:25):
You know, there is a whole ale in the grocery
store for feminine products.
Speaker 4 (26:33):
There is no man cold isle. There's no man cold isle.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
That that you know has beer chips, magazines on guns
and and uh, race cars, nothing, you know, the kind
of stuff you need to get through a man cold
the man cold isle. There's no isle where women feel
really uncomfortable hanging out and say, oh no, that's that's
(26:59):
that's the man cold isle. Yeah, some feminine hygieneile. Yeah,
stay there long enough, you'll get a restraining order.
Speaker 4 (27:07):
But women, there is no man cold isle.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
This is good. You would think with Trump, Trump seems
like he'd be a real man cold kind of guy.
He would demand, he would demand some sort of some
sort of monument with a reflecting pool. After he survived.
At you something something to the man cold, just something
(27:34):
to think about, all right, we could actually talk about
some some real stuff, just you know, keep in mind,
I don't want to.
Speaker 3 (27:43):
Real quick here though. We have a text message from Rochelle
at the three three one oh three. Just text Mike
or Michael first. Actually, John, just when I thought listening
to a man complaining while sick was the worst, you
managed to top it. Complaining about being sick while not
sick and having to babble on for twenty plus minutes
about the sympathy you should gain is exactly why I
(28:05):
have no sympathy for the man cold.
Speaker 2 (28:08):
You see what I mean? Women, Rodney. Women. Yeah, people
don't understand what we go through. You know, the the
quiet support groups after a man cold. Who are all
sitting around in those stupid folding chairs. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (28:25):
I read from web mds to what happens for the
man cold for men versus women. It hits harder for us.
It just it does.
Speaker 2 (28:33):
And the problem with the man cold is women don't
give us the sympathy we need during man cold. Can
I get an amen? Yeah? That women should be there,
you know, if you expect us to be there in
the delivery room, which, by the way, in previous generations
you weren't even allowed in the delivery room. You were
(28:58):
in some waiting room smoking cigars with the other guys,
you know, waiting to see if if your baby's going
to be ugly or not. And that was that was
how men took care of women during during your pregnancy.
But but no, now we got to be in there
for the horror show and and hold your hand and
(29:21):
listen to you complain I'm in pain. Ah, I need
an epidural. I don't want an episiotomy. I mean all
this stuff, me me, me, me me, But we get
a cold, which again scientifically ten times worse than than childbirth.
Speaker 4 (29:42):
It's science, don't deny it.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
And women are not expected to give us, give us
the sympathy we we so desperately need. It's just so
so so unfair. Is there anything else like that? All right?
Any other? Last done dragging? Any other advice for women
(30:07):
who are dealing with a man with a man cold?
Speaker 3 (30:11):
Dude, John, if you were in the iheartstudio, it's possible
you would be greeted by a group of women with
pitchforks as you exit. You must be listening to doctor
Vauci regarding man colds, be sure to wear your five masks.
This probably explains why, yes, I am still very, very
divorced and lonely. All right, Oh give me amen, man,
(30:39):
I'm saying what men are afraid to say.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
All right, Denver Gazette. Amid looming staff layoffs, two hundred
and fifty million dollar budget deficit, and a host of
other challenges, our Mayor Mike Johnson outlined an optimistic vision
for Denver on Monday in his second State of the
City address. Why do we have a State of the
(31:09):
City address? I mean, at what point? We'll talk about
that next. Let's take this breather, Michael, I mean John, Wait,
I mean Dragon.
Speaker 4 (31:18):
Why don't you play stand by your man? That's perfect
for this segment.
Speaker 2 (31:24):
It is it is. I'm John Caldera, filling in for
a dying, fighting for his every last breath. Brave, brave
Michael Brown, who has a man cold? Feel free? Give
me a call three h three seven one three eight
two five five. Yeah, we know what it's man called.
(31:47):
It's women have no respect for the suffering of a
man cold. I don't know how we got off on
all that. Oh, that's right, because he was stupid enough.
He was stupid enough to come in to the studio,
lay on the floor and and go, I can do it.
Speaker 4 (32:10):
Put me in, coach.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
I'm okay, I can do this.
Speaker 4 (32:16):
Men hate going to the doctor.
Speaker 2 (32:20):
I don't. I don't care what it is. I had
a heart attack. I didn't want to go to the doctor.
There's and the older you get, the more you've got
to go to the doctor. Why I hate going to
the doctor and you're the same way, I bet is
that when you go to the doctor, whatever they have
they really can't fix. There were two. All they do
(32:40):
is send you to another specialist. All that specialist does
is require you to come back in three weeks and
then come back three weeks after. And every time you
do it, you gotta you gotta wait, you gotta wait,
you gotta deal with a bureaucracy, you gotta fill out
the forums. And we just rather we'd rather just die.
You know. It's it's that way, It's it's easier that way.
(33:03):
Oh and there's also this little part. Have you ever
noticed that the more embarrassing reason that you're there for
seeing the doctor, the hotter the receptionist is if you're
there and your arm has been ripped off by a chainsaw. Noah,
it's just some guy as a receptionist. You go there
with hemorrhoids, and of course it's it's Lady mc sexy
(33:28):
at the at the reception desk.
Speaker 4 (33:30):
Back after that,
So when will we find out the results of the
Colorado walkway decision from polis? And it looked like a
simple Google survey form, so that means the statistics should
have been ready at twelve or one am. I bet
if it didn't go his way, we're not going to
(00:22):
hear about it for a while.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Interesting. Oh, by the way, Michael Brown nos a key.
He's not feeling well.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
The poor bastard actually decided to show up today, sat
in the control room with his head in his hands
for about ten minutes, looks up at me and goes.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
Ding our own thing. I can do this today? As
you call dev.
Speaker 3 (00:57):
Well, you look and sound like crap. So yeah, we
can to do something.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Okay, feel really really bad. He's probably listening on on
his way home. So let me let me just uh,
you know, there's one thing coming to work, oh drunk,
and then there's another one just coming to work that hungover,
really brownie, really.
Speaker 4 (01:24):
So unprofessional. Tequila to some is delicious.
Speaker 5 (01:29):
I don't know what's going on. I keep drinking more
and more medicine. I just don't feel better. I'm not
getting any better any better. Doctor my bartender's named doctor.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
Doctor. Can I get another, a little more medicine here, please,
thank you.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
So he really did try to come in and do
the job today, but it just it was disgusting.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
It is so quintessentially God I to do to do
what Brownie did. Brownie, I I feel your My quick story,
I'm I'm driving to work. I live in Boulder. I
work in Denver at the Independence Institute. Check us out
at thinkfreedom dot org. Thinkfreedom dot org. And and I'm
(02:19):
not feeling right. You know, you're just not feeling right.
I'm not feeling right. And then kinda kind of feel
more not right, and I kind of feel this weird
tightness in my chest.
Speaker 4 (02:29):
And I'm like, I don't know what's going on.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
And then it finally hits me. I'm having a panic attack.
This is what a panic attack. I've I've heard people
saying panic attack or something. And I gotta, I gotta,
I gotta get to work because I'm I'm running a
meeting in heaven forbid, a meeting not happened, you know,
without me there to run it. And and so I'm
(02:57):
driving to work and it gets worse and worse and worse,
and I'm thinking, man, I can see why people freak
out about panic attacks. Now, this is this is bad,
bad stuff. And then it hits me, what if it's
not a panic attack, what if I'm having like some
(03:17):
heart trouble. Well, I still got to do the meeting,
and so I'm just gonna go to work. And then
I make a very good decision. I called my brother.
I said, you know, have you ever felt this way,
this this thing that's happening to me?
Speaker 4 (03:32):
And he said, ah, yeah, that happened to me once.
Turned out to be a panic attack. Don't worry about it.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
And I said, yeah, all right, it'll pass. You'll be
fine one way or the other. It'll pass. So why
don't you just why don't you just you know? But
also I say, hey, can you stand the line? Yeah,
I'll stand the line. I'm driving to work. It's not
getting better, it's not getting better, but I got to
do this this meeting. It's just, you know, partly a
(03:58):
zoom meeting. And and then my brother comes up with
this brilliant idea and says, and I quote, hey, why
don't you, you know, just in case you're having some
real problem, go go to the emergency room, just hang
out in the waiting room and you know, do your
zoom call from there, and you'll look really butch, you
(04:19):
know how cool. Yeah, I'm having chest pains, but I'm
I'm doing it from the.
Speaker 4 (04:24):
Hospital because this meeting is so important.
Speaker 2 (04:27):
That's brilliant. So I drive myself from almost from Boulder
all the way to to Denver General. I don't know
why what do they call it now? Denver healthy? Old
people call them by the old names. And and well,
long story short, Yeah, I'm having a friggin heart attack.
(04:49):
They called widow maker vein. Actually, nobody in the hospital
calls it the widow maker artery. It's the artery on
the outside of your on the outside of your heart
is ninety percent block and uh and and they they
they fixed me up. Ask them afterwards, what would have
(05:09):
happened if I if I went to work, you would
have died. But you know, other than that, everything major.
And it was really it was really a fifty to
fifty thing. At the very end of whether or not
I should go into the hospital or not, I would
not be here sitting in for Brownie, which by the way,
(05:30):
I enjoy doing. If it wasn't you, which I enjoy
getting paid for. Here you go that's much better because
you've got to be awake at this.
Speaker 4 (05:40):
Time, which sucks a god no, and.
Speaker 2 (05:45):
Yeah, this is this is just an awful I'm not
a morning person, so you know, I don't think I'm
awake yet, so this is part of the dream I'm having.
Point being, Guys do not go to the doctor. We
just don't do. And women are like, why don't you
go to the doctor. We don't go to the doctor
because going to the doctor just sucks.
Speaker 3 (06:10):
We've been defeated by a lousy virus or bug or well,
it's an attact. It's more than just defeat.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
I mean, when you live my life, defeat is you know,
a standard operating procedure. It's it's that feeling. You know,
that feeling when you're holding your wife's or girlfriend's purse
while she's in the dressing room trying on fifteen things
and you're just standing there for five hours. That is
(06:39):
the feeling of going to the doctor. And we we
hate that feeling. It's like you're waiting in the waiting room.
You're waiting in the little room, you're filling out forms,
and no matter what he or she tells you, they
just send you to somebody else to do the same thing,
and then they send you to somebody else do the
(07:00):
same thing, and then they send you to something else
to do. And it's like, no, no, I'd rather have
a nice, honorable, quiet death in the K House studios
as I'm dying from whatever it is Brownie was dying of.
I think that's the reason guys don't go it. Going
(07:21):
to the doctor stinks. Now, it's better now that you know,
eighty percent of all doctors are women, and in ten
years it'll be ninety percent. The statistics are ridiculous on that.
It's just ridiculous that college now is very female dominated.
(07:42):
Men don't go to college, or should I say boys
don't go to college as much anymore. I think it's
because it's been really feminized and just stinks, and so
guys are like, no, not gonna do it. In the
same way that guys don't go to the doctor. It's
the same thing not doing it, not gone. That's my sense.
So at least right now, let me think, yeah, yeah,
(08:06):
cardiologist is a chick. My primary care doctor is a chick.
Speaker 4 (08:10):
Uh No, I's all one.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
One, dude. But it's it's amazing and I don't think
it's a it's a bad thing. It's except you know
you you can't tell as many dirty jokes in the
in the exam room. They apparently don't like that. But
other than that, female doctors, how to put it, they
(08:36):
they're a little bit more empathetic. I I I've never
had a female doctor. Eh, just walk it off. It's
just just a heart attack. Well, anyway, Brownie, I hope,
I hope you're feeling better. U can't move, all right?
I After everything I just said, let's just spend a
(08:59):
moment talking about the real issue that that men have,
the one issue that men will seek help for. They
will ask for help. You hear it all the time
on all the ads on talk radio. Yeah, I'm talking
about the man cold. Oh god, not a rectile dysfunction,
(09:23):
that's that's old news. No, it's the man cold. You
know what I'm talking about, the man called. Women have
no sense of how debilitating the man cold is. Now,
whatever Brownie has it probably just man cold. The man
cold is just a regular head cold. Most men will
(09:47):
just show up to work, not complain. They lop off
an arm or a leg, they got stage four cancer
of the thumb.
Speaker 4 (09:54):
They don't care. They'll just whap it off.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
They'll still just go And it's just a scratch, scratch,
it's a flesh wound. And that's just the way men
are until it happens to the to the man cold. Now,
women who are generally speaking very I don't know how
(10:16):
to put it empathetic, they understand, they care that they
have no sympathy for what a man goes through with
a man cold, that it is a life or death situation. Now,
according to the New England Journal of Medicine, a man
(10:37):
cold is at least ten times more painful than childbirth.
You know this is you know what it's like. You're
laying on the bed and the remote control is just
a few inches away, and you can't really roll over
to get it. You have to call your girlfriend or
(10:59):
wife for somebody over to bring it to you.
Speaker 4 (11:02):
Why man cold?
Speaker 2 (11:05):
That's it?
Speaker 4 (11:06):
Man cold? You know it's uh and you need.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
Someone to kiss your forehead and say, what are they doing this?
Get there there, little bunny and bring you fluids and
patch your cheek and tuck you in. That is the
only thing that will help a man cold. A man
cold will take you out. Now, I think about this women.
(11:36):
Women talk all about how bad childbirth is, and we
have this whole system to help women through childbirth because
currently it is slightly uncomfortable or something. But we don't
have any apparatus for the man cold. We don't, we don't,
(11:58):
we don't have the the we don't have maternity leave
for man cold. Nothing. And listen, women don't like being
there when you have man cold. My former wife had
three children, three I was there for each one of
(12:20):
those berths, and everything seems so centered around well, you
know her, not about you know, my needs. They're out there.
All she did was complain, you know, I'm in pain,
my water broke, I want an epidural. In the meantime,
(12:45):
Nobody in the delivering room offered me a beer or
even a comfortable charity sit in. Didn't ask if I
wanted to watch ESPN. Nothing.
Speaker 4 (12:54):
It was like it was all about her.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
Good God now, and I took it. I took it
in stride. You know, all right, you know fine, this
is this is you know, apparently she's going through you
know something. But then when a man cold strikes, which
is scientifically ten times more painful than giving childbirth. It's
(13:24):
science has been science has been settled on it. There
is no more debate. Don't be don't be a man
cold denier. You know. Then women are like, you just
have a cold. What do you mean I did. I
was there for you when you had childbirth. I've got
the sniffles. Now where's my support system? Can I get
(13:50):
an amen to that from them?
Speaker 3 (13:51):
And here's the other thing too, about women in giving birth.
They choose. You know, some women is like, I want
to have another baby. No man sits there and goes,
I want to have another man called it doesn't happen.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
So, you know, childbirth might not be that bad. Especially
can't be that bad. I want a baby, Yeah, I
want another baby. You know men, men don't like paying
for a new car, but we'll go and buy a
new car because we want the new car so much.
Speaker 4 (14:23):
Yeah, childbirth cannot be that bad.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
If if women decide to do it again and again,
no man chooses a man cold again, true science. That
is science, boys and girls. Nobody can argue with that
kind of science. You know, we have not we have
(14:48):
not done enough men cold education. We don't have a campaign,
We don't really have a five oh one c three charity.
Speaker 4 (14:58):
We don't have a telethon. We don't. I don't even
think we have a ribbon?
Speaker 2 (15:03):
Do we have? A man cold does not even have
a ribbon. But yet there are entire stores based on
buying things women want when they have babies. I mean
just arbitrary things like baby strollers and baby buggies and
(15:24):
a changing table and a crib, crib crib what like that.
You know, the dog sleeps on the floor. What your
baby can't sleep on the floor? What? You know, until
it's verbal, it can't complain, so you know why not?
So even this, it won't even roll over. So it's fine,
You're fine. You can keep it in your kitchen drawer somewhere.
(15:46):
It's it's a baby, you know. And then you know,
breast pumps that look like some sort of weird hookah.
All these things, you know for a woman. But when
a man has a man cold, there's there's there's no
man cold shower, there's no man called stores, there's no
(16:08):
magazines about it. You know, this is the silent killer.
This is the silent killer because men are too proud
to come out and say I survived a man cold.
Oh yeah. They go to therapy and you know, have PTSD.
(16:28):
You know, they're right there with the Vietnam VET. You
know they're in the same circle going, Oh, man, I've
seen some stuff. I've seen some stuff. Yeah, I was
really tired and my nose got really red and I
couldn't reach the remote control. And you know, the brothers
are all hugging each other. But it's all in shame
because you're not allowed to talk about the man cold.
(16:52):
This is.
Speaker 4 (16:54):
So Michael Brown has a man cold.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
Brother. We are there for you, We are there for you,
and we need some sort of support tree, We need
some sort of you know, you go to church and
stead of like and let's pray for those in our
congregation who are struggling with health issues. Michael Brown has
a man cold. And you hear the murmurs, Oh, not
a man cold. Oh I got not a man cold.
(17:20):
He almost died, He almost died. He almost died. Man,
what about his family? Oh can you imagine his family
is going through he's got a man cold.
Speaker 4 (17:28):
I think of his children and grandchildren. How does he
explain it to the grandkids.
Speaker 2 (17:35):
You know, there's no there's no memorial to a man cold.
Speaker 4 (17:40):
There is a memorial to women in Vietnam.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
There's a memorial for women who served in Vietnam, nurses
who served in Vietnam. There's no memorial for man cold survivors.
We live in silent. It is time we do something
about this. That we're here. We survived a man cold,
(18:07):
and and we will not be forgotten.
Speaker 4 (18:14):
I had a madden cold, and it was I thought
I was gonna die.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
Man, I was gonna die three three seven one, three
eighty five, eighty five e two together for a two
five five. There we go eight two five five. Let's
let's let's bring it together for Brownie.
Speaker 6 (18:36):
Shall we please let me know what DEI doctor made up?
Man cold? First time I've heard it, and hopefully the last.
Have a nice day sunny here in northern New York.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
You've never heard the term man cold, man cold? It
It is a traditional term. It is a medical term
that came from the Journal of American Medicine and whiny men.
You know what a man cold is. It's it's it's
(19:21):
when you a man have a cold and you hate it.
Speaker 4 (19:25):
It's a man cold.
Speaker 2 (19:27):
I'm John Caldera in for the ailing man cold struck
Michael Brown. Come on, you've had the man cold. Go
to YouTube type in man cold. I forget which group
did a spectacular skid about it. The husband's laying on
(19:48):
the couch, going, oh, there you are, wifey. You weren't
there and I yelled for you, I said, Jennifer, but
you didn't come. So so I called nine one one.
Well what I couldn't reach the remote, and you know,
(20:13):
the guys come from nine to one to one. The
medics come rushing in. You know what happened? Oh, my god,
And the wife says, he he just has a cold.
My God's sake, woman, he doesn't just have a cold.
He has a man cold. Well I've got a cold too,
says the wife. He ain't killed too. Don't you understand, woman,
(20:37):
it's not a regular cold.
Speaker 4 (20:39):
He has a man cold.
Speaker 3 (20:40):
Oh, even straight from WebMD here, I'm just looking at this.
Some experts say men and women may in fact respond
differently to colds. Some king some studies say men have
more symptoms than women when they get colds.
Speaker 2 (20:58):
It's a thing. So it's a real thing. Women, it's
it's worse than giving birth. You need to be there
for your man. I'm hoping missus Brown is out there kissing.
Speaker 4 (21:14):
His forehead going, poor little baby.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
No, I'm gonna stay with you through the whole thing.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
That's what a man needs during a man Even here
WebMD it continues to say the female sex hormone estrogen,
slows down how fast a virus multiplies. This may lead
to fewer symptoms. The flu virus may not spread as
quickly in women because of the estrogen and how the
female body reacts to it. Studies have shown that the
(21:40):
same thing applies to the cold virus. Studies have not
shown the same thing. Yeah, so, yeah, apparently women they
don't get as sick as men. This is straight women
dot com Cold and flu. I was just making up
this crap, but right, it is real.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
This is great science. Man, Science finally comes to help me.
That's I'm going to frame that. Put it, put it
above me when I'm sick.
Speaker 3 (22:16):
As I'm reading this, part of the brain that controls
body temperature is larger in men because of testosterone. This
may lead to higher fevers in men than in women.
Speaker 4 (22:29):
Oh my god, where the victim?
Speaker 2 (22:34):
Do you understand this?
Speaker 4 (22:35):
We are the victim. Where's our march?
Speaker 2 (22:41):
Where is our where's our charity bike ride? Where? Where's
the Foundation for man cold research. This is this is
just wrong. This is sexism. You know what that is.
It's just sexism women, you know. And the only treatment,
(23:03):
I'm sure if you read on in that web Md
story and look at the only treatment for man cold
is to have a good woman by your side, kissing
your forehead, saying, they're there, poor bunny. Let me get
you some more orange juice. That's it. That's the only
(23:23):
thing that will that will help. It's science. Man.
Speaker 4 (23:28):
If you cannot argue with science.
Speaker 2 (23:30):
What are you a denier? Oh, poor brownie, he's got
he's got a man cold. So I I this happened.
I don't know, ten years ago or something. I got
a man I mean, I'm real man cold. I was
out for like three weeks. I just could not move,
and I kept going to the doctor and everywhere I
(23:54):
went I was like, yeah, you got a cold, you
just need more rest. I couldn't move like three weeks.
Now that's a man cold. But no sympathy, no sympathy.
My daughter at the time, she was living at my house.
She looked at me and said, eh, you got a
(24:16):
man cold, and she just turned and walked away. The cruelty.
I still have to see his shrink over this three
sessions a week to get over the shame that society
gives man with when he has a man cold. There
you go.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
Now, men, by the way, still go to work and yeah,
like Michael's dumbass actually showed up today and he's got
a man cold.
Speaker 2 (24:43):
And he's got a man cold. We told him to
go house. But still guys will go to work and
ripsaw off one of their fingers and go and still
stay at work. Where's the super cool you got the
duct tape? Yeah? Anybody?
Speaker 4 (24:59):
Because we're stupid men.
Speaker 2 (25:02):
But when we have a man cold, man, the world stops,
and it should stop. There is nothing, there is nothing
worse than a man called oll. If women could understand
women childbirth times ten, that's what a man cold is.
That's all. That's all we just need.
Speaker 4 (25:21):
We just need a little sympathy, some kisses.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
We don't need any flowers. We just need you to
help us with the remote control. And you have to
stay with us. Why we watch the die hard marathon?
That's all. Is that so much to ask, you know?
And then after that both Godfather one and Godfather two,
(25:48):
and please, ladies, never think that we need to watch
Godfather three. Never a good woman will and you have
to sit there and listen to.
Speaker 4 (26:00):
Us explain the beauty of.
Speaker 2 (26:02):
Godfather one and Godfather to to you while we have
a man cold and you have to look like you're
very interested, that's all. Is it really that hard? And
and when do we get a man cold every every
fifteen years? It's not very other week, every every other week.
Speaker 4 (26:22):
I don't know, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (26:25):
You know, there is a whole ale in the grocery
store for feminine products.
Speaker 4 (26:33):
There is no man cold isle. There's no man cold isle.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
That that you know has beer chips, magazines on guns
and and uh, race cars, nothing, you know, the kind
of stuff you need to get through a man cold
the man cold isle. There's no isle where women feel
really uncomfortable hanging out and say, oh no, that's that's
(26:59):
that's the man cold isle. Yeah, some feminine hygieneile. Yeah,
stay there long enough, you'll get a restraining order.
Speaker 4 (27:07):
But women, there is no man cold isle.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
This is good. You would think with Trump, Trump seems
like he'd be a real man cold kind of guy.
He would demand, he would demand some sort of some
sort of monument with a reflecting pool. After he survived.
At you something something to the man cold, just something
(27:34):
to think about, all right, we could actually talk about
some some real stuff, just you know, keep in mind,
I don't want to.
Speaker 3 (27:43):
Real quick here though. We have a text message from Rochelle
at the three three one oh three. Just text Mike
or Michael first. Actually, John, just when I thought listening
to a man complaining while sick was the worst, you
managed to top it. Complaining about being sick while not
sick and having to babble on for twenty plus minutes
about the sympathy you should gain is exactly why I
(28:05):
have no sympathy for the man cold.
Speaker 2 (28:08):
You see what I mean? Women, Rodney. Women. Yeah, people
don't understand what we go through. You know, the the
quiet support groups after a man cold. Who are all
sitting around in those stupid folding chairs. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (28:25):
I read from web mds to what happens for the
man cold for men versus women. It hits harder for us.
It just it does.
Speaker 2 (28:33):
And the problem with the man cold is women don't
give us the sympathy we need during man cold. Can
I get an amen? Yeah? That women should be there,
you know, if you expect us to be there in
the delivery room, which, by the way, in previous generations
you weren't even allowed in the delivery room. You were
(28:58):
in some waiting room smoking cigars with the other guys,
you know, waiting to see if if your baby's going
to be ugly or not. And that was that was
how men took care of women during during your pregnancy.
But but no, now we got to be in there
for the horror show and and hold your hand and
(29:21):
listen to you complain I'm in pain. Ah, I need
an epidural. I don't want an episiotomy. I mean all
this stuff, me me, me, me me, But we get
a cold, which again scientifically ten times worse than than childbirth.
Speaker 4 (29:42):
It's science, don't deny it.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
And women are not expected to give us, give us
the sympathy we we so desperately need. It's just so
so so unfair. Is there anything else like that? All right?
Any other? Last done dragging? Any other advice for women
(30:07):
who are dealing with a man with a man cold?
Speaker 3 (30:11):
Dude, John, if you were in the iheartstudio, it's possible
you would be greeted by a group of women with
pitchforks as you exit. You must be listening to doctor
Vauci regarding man colds, be sure to wear your five masks.
This probably explains why, yes, I am still very, very
divorced and lonely. All right, Oh give me amen, man,
(30:39):
I'm saying what men are afraid to say.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
All right, Denver Gazette. Amid looming staff layoffs, two hundred
and fifty million dollar budget deficit, and a host of
other challenges, our Mayor Mike Johnson outlined an optimistic vision
for Denver on Monday in his second State of the
City address. Why do we have a State of the
(31:09):
City address? I mean, at what point? We'll talk about
that next. Let's take this breather, Michael, I mean John, Wait,
I mean Dragon.
Speaker 4 (31:18):
Why don't you play stand by your man? That's perfect
for this segment.
Speaker 2 (31:24):
It is it is. I'm John Caldera, filling in for
a dying, fighting for his every last breath. Brave, brave
Michael Brown, who has a man cold? Feel free? Give
me a call three h three seven one three eight
two five five. Yeah, we know what it's man called.
(31:47):
It's women have no respect for the suffering of a
man cold. I don't know how we got off on
all that. Oh, that's right, because he was stupid enough.
He was stupid enough to come in to the studio,
lay on the floor and and go, I can do it.
Speaker 4 (32:10):
Put me in, coach.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
I'm okay, I can do this.
Speaker 4 (32:16):
Men hate going to the doctor.
Speaker 2 (32:20):
I don't. I don't care what it is. I had
a heart attack. I didn't want to go to the doctor.
There's and the older you get, the more you've got
to go to the doctor. Why I hate going to
the doctor and you're the same way, I bet is
that when you go to the doctor, whatever they have
they really can't fix. There were two. All they do
(32:40):
is send you to another specialist. All that specialist does
is require you to come back in three weeks and
then come back three weeks after. And every time you
do it, you gotta you gotta wait, you gotta wait,
you gotta deal with a bureaucracy, you gotta fill out
the forums. And we just rather we'd rather just die.
You know. It's it's that way, It's it's easier that way.
(33:03):
Oh and there's also this little part. Have you ever
noticed that the more embarrassing reason that you're there for
seeing the doctor, the hotter the receptionist is if you're
there and your arm has been ripped off by a chainsaw. Noah,
it's just some guy as a receptionist. You go there
with hemorrhoids, and of course it's it's Lady mc sexy
(33:28):
at the at the reception desk.
Speaker 4 (33:30):
Back after that,
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