April 23, 2024 • 22 mins
Kim Kardashian was on with Jimmy Kimmel last night and addressed rumors about her! Do you wash your feet before going to bed? Do you hate the sound of cardboard?
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
If you've ever been in an officeand had a real job, they had
phones, and on the bottom theywere little buttons. Each one of those
buttons was a separate line, soyou could put one on hold and click
to the next line. Each oneof those lines had a separate number.
I don't know, man, theworld definitely would not be better if we
got rid of all cell phones.Jeff's world might be, but our world,
(00:25):
the rest of us, it wouldnot be because you wouldn't be able
to get this input any other way. Love you. I listened to your
discussion about flip phones versus smartphones.I'm a couple of years from Reiner's age,
and I don't like the social media, but you can't live without a
(00:47):
smartphone. I have my plane tickets, my sports tickets, and Uber on
my smartphone. I don't think youcan do that on a flip It could
be easy. I'm ready in oneto free. Is he wrong, guys,
(01:07):
No, I don't think so.I think you get a You're gonna
have a smartphone to use these apps? I think probably maybe. I don't
know. I've had some phone along time. I don't know it's been
a while it has, But Iwant a dumb phone. All right,
I believe the Great Kevin Great,it's gonna be in here in just a
little bit and we'll ken dig alittle deeper on the Mavericks game and where
(01:30):
it all goes from here. Let'sback on track tonight, so stand by
for that. He'll get our headright for what's coming down tonight. He
better. Yeah, yeah, Kevin'sall wrong to get it right right now,
though, before we get to him, we've got this done for Hollywood
(01:51):
Swinging. Brought to you by AlamoDraft House Cinema. Thank you for welcome.
Thank you, Alamo Draft House Cinema. Yes, I'm going to tell
you about let's freaking chill coming upwith the Bin and Skin Show because there
are still some tickets available and thisis going to be a grand old time
(02:12):
on April thirtieth at the Alamo DraftHouse in Dentton. You can join the
Bin and Skin Show. And whenit's the beIN and Skin Show, you
know Christina is going to be there, and you know sweaty Man Steve is
going to be there. Cue.I didn't want to say that, so
I said, sweaty Man sweat Steve. Yeah, yeah, they're all going
(02:34):
to be there. How fun isthat you can watch mcgruber with all of
those crazy cats. Tickets just sevendollars for this space is limited. Get
your tickets while you still can atninety seven to one Thefreak dot Com.
Do it now, do it?Do it? Thank you, thank you.
So. Kim Kardashian went on JimmyKimmel this week, and it's not,
(03:00):
you know, any kind of bignews when Kim Kardashian goes on a
late night talk show. She doesthat all the time. But the topics
that they were discussing I thought werequite interesting. So what Kimmel had here
was a list of rumors that hadgone around about Kim Kardashian over the years,
(03:22):
and he had her agree to sitthere and say yes or no to
whether these rumors are true or not. By the way, Jimmy Kimmel,
Yeah, the best there is outthere at this right now. Yeah you
think so. I do. He'sgood. He's real funny. I like
him. And also with Letterman andLeno gone, yeah, it's really him
(03:46):
and follon these days right used tobe but competing with each other of those
who were out there doing it now. I think Kimmel's the best, just
a little bit. No, no, no rehabs you the wrong way.
She reminds me of a Sunday schoolteacher. He tries to be funny.
Oh like, who's like doing alittle skit for the students about Noah's ark
(04:10):
or whatever, trying to make jokes. Yeah, that's what he reminds me
of. Anyway, rupture, No, you're fine, You're fine. Uh
So some of these rumors that heasked her about, I actually hadn't heard.
I'm not like tracking all of theKim K rumors, and they don't
keep up with the kim stuff.I don't, I don't. I was
(04:32):
initially intrigued. We need somebody inhere. Who does I need a different
Hollywood rep. He's only on theTAA beat. No, I mean kim
K hasn't done much lately. Okay, Well, what are these rumors that
she's got out there? I actuallywas intrigued by this article, this story,
because you know, I thought maybeshe'd respond to the tailor disc track
(04:55):
she's not going to do that.But she didn't. He's not going to
ask her about that. He didn'task her about It's probably a very sensitive
subject. But no, he askedher about some of these crazy rumors,
and turns out she's real quirky,finicky, weird. And I don't know
if you get to a certain levelof celebrity where you can just make all
of these kind of bizarre requests ordecide that you need everything in your world
(05:16):
to be exactly right. Yes,but like you get more finicky because you
know you have the power to youdo it because you have people help make
sure that every little thing you comeinto contact with is exactly the way you
like it. You know, I'llexplain here with this audio this will all
make more sense to you. There'stwo cuts. We're going to fire through
(05:40):
a few of these rumors here inthis first cut, And I want to
see what you guys think. Isit true you blow dry your jewelry before
you put it on? Very true? Why do you do that? Because
I hate being freezing? And whenyou put on cold jewelry or like anything
with a zipper, I just Ineed it warm really, And then to
put it on. How much jewelryare you wearing that exchanges the temperature of
(06:01):
your bad or just like a meshmetal anything that's like a chain mail.
Yeah, when I wear a chainmail I understand. Yeah. That means
you wash your feet every night beforegetting into bed. I do. Good.
You sleep with your eyes slightly open? I do. How is that
possible? How do you know there'sfootage because my sisters have taken videos they
(06:26):
have yes, yes, and youdon't wake up with dry eyes from that?
No? No, right, okay, So I want to discuss these
three before we move on washing yourFeet's good? Y'all wash your feet before
bed? No? Not always?I mean I do it half assed foot
washing when I shower, Yeah,I will soap on my hand and I
(06:47):
run it on my feet. Yeah. If I shower, they get,
you know, whatever's on the outerpoor portion of them cleaned off. Do
you just let soap run down onyour body and assume your feet are cleaner?
Do you go down there? Don'tlie? Both? What if I
(07:10):
have cause to believe there's been alittle bit of a mess down there?
Have they been in well, eitherbeing a mess? You know, like
if I've been wandering around barefooted inmud or something like that. How often
is that? Not often? Whenyou get off work you'll frolic around in
some mud when you're looking for geese? And your looking for geese and then
(07:31):
running from them because they're evil.Not often, no, no, But
if you do happen to find yourselfin a muddy situation, then what you're
saying is that you will scrub yourfeet. Yes, I will, I'll
get them squared away before I goto bed. But only if you've been
running laps on a NASCAR dirt track. Yeah. Otherwise, and you're saying
(07:55):
you scrub your feet, I'd getthe top and maybe a little tap on
the ball them, but not much. What I'll do is I'll I'll have
the soap in my hands, andI will pick up the foot and kind
of run a hand on it,but not the soap bar, just the
hand with the soap. Did yourparents teach you to do that? They
didn't teach you to do anything LikeI'm feeling like I was never taught this.
(08:15):
Wait, you don't clean your feetat all? Not really. You
were disgusted. She doesn't have to. Yeah, they're not gross. I'm
in the same boat. You don'teven like every now and then, I'm
like, you don't, dude,like every now and yeah, you don't,
Okay, you don't. You guysdon't your feet no, nice.
Yeah, doesn't it tickle? No, no, it doesn't tickle because you're
(08:43):
hitting it with regular force, nota little. I hear the tickle.
You hear the pickle and the tackle. I do I fear both? Do
you fear every ackle? I fearthe pickle and the tickle. I don't
know if there's any other eckles,and I fear them. Oh yeah,
we all fear fear the sickle.So do you ever tickle the pickle?
(09:09):
What? What? What do youmean? What are you saying? You
know, go there and get youa nice you know, kosher dial.
Yes, I just kind of ticka little bit. Why would I do?
Why would anyone do that? You'rejust trying to cover for the dirty
thing you just said. No,I am not not. You know,
(09:33):
I wouldn't talk I wouldn't talk toyou about anything like that. Okay,
what do you what do you thinkwould happen with the kosher dell when it
was the little pickles? Like heI mean, I love the pickle.
I don't like the pickle. Idon't like the tickle, but I love
(09:56):
the pickle. If I'm just rankingit, yeah, I'm way higher on
the pickle than I am on thetickle, and if we're being honest,
the sickle probably comes in above you. Oh yeah, but what about a
woman who's fickle? Yeah, no, like fickle. No, but I
will take a nickel. Oh okay, yeah, oh maybe we should.
(10:24):
Maybe we need to scrub our underfeet. Guys are disgusting. You don't washers,
You like a nice drums sickle.You cannot tell us we're gross about
anything. I can't. You cannotwash your feet. You cannot. It's
the grossest part of your body.You wear socks and it's in a little
oven all day and it's walking aroundand it's funky. It washed in the
shower. Don't get washed. Waterhits them. Yes, that is washing.
(10:48):
I cannot scrub my underfeet. Itwill tickle too much. It won't
tickle because you're not tickling. You'rehitting it with good force. You're hitting
it with scrub force. Scrub horsedoesn't tickle, light touch, tickle,
scrub or so no tickle. Idon't believe it, and I'll never know
because I don't want to try it. I don't want to tickle myself.
(11:11):
Sounds so weird. Not what wouldhappen? You would not lie, You
just peel off layers of filth thatyou have on there. All right,
well, do I'm you own soap? Yes, you have soap in the
house. I have, but likeshower jewel, body wash. Oh god,
you are gross. Okay, youdon't even have real soap. Do
(11:33):
not come at me right now aboutbeing grosked. You don't even have soap.
You were the one that had everythingflying out of all of your portals
yesterday. Yeah, I bombed anddiaryhide yes, yeah, and what yeah
you know what else? I didwash my feet? No, you didn't.
Now you're just lying. I didwash my feet yesterday. I did
last night. I had a niceshower show, all right. I have
(11:58):
my bar so real soap, notthe mass produced crap. I got real
soap, and I gave it agood Yeah, gave it some of that.
You rub that bar soap all aroundand then you use it again,
and then you use it again,yes, and use it again. Correct.
Yeah, you rub that at thebottom of your feet and then the
next day you rub it around yourhead. Here's saying soap doesn't work.
(12:20):
I think both of y'all are gross, non foot wash. I can't decide
where I follow this. Yeah,you said that you only wash your underfeet
if you're playing in the mud onlyafter a pickup baseball game, barefoot frolicking
(12:41):
around a little field. All right. Well, the other thing Kim Kardashian
said that's weird of sleeping with hereyes a little bit open, is that
I think sometimes when you're in whateverlevel of sleep, like you can see
people's eyes kind of move a littlebit. Yeah, but I don't know
about just being perma kind of open, know, like major pain, Yeah,
(13:05):
major pain can do it. No, b what are you doing David
Wayne's Yeah, he beats up bambam, bigelow things to do the little
(13:26):
engine that could turns into a massacremurder story. And he's telling it to
a kid. That sounds very strange. I did have a friend in high
school. Her dad was a plasticsurgeon, and he he would, oh,
yeah, that's an expensive school missoo. Yeah yeah, uh well she
(13:46):
went high school and mazoo with me, and he would kind of like practice
on his wife sometimes practice plastic surgery. Yeah, like you'd try, like
you you know, nothing major,but like maybe there's like a face thing
where it's supposed to shed your skinand whatever. Whatever, and so she
(14:07):
did a lot of that, andshe came to visit us in college and
I remember looking over and she wassleeping with her eyes wide open because of
some procedures that she had just hadwhere she couldn't close her eyes. Got
the Jerry Jones where they just tightenit up behind your skull, hold it
all back, eyes wide open onthe little dorm bed. And I was
like, did she your mom?Did your mom? Did she have a
(14:28):
mask or anything? No, justlaying there with her eyes open and sleeping.
That's weird. Yeah. I wasscared that she was not with us
anymore, but she was, andshe's great and she's awesome. Okay,
so those are some weird Kim Kardashianthings. Let's let the rest of this
audio play out, because there's more. You celebrated your fourteenth birthday at never
(14:50):
Land Ranch. I did. That'scrazy? Oh wow, you have someone
take the Starbucks leeve off your coffeebecause you hate the sound of card and
I, yes, that's true.And I hate the feeling is that a
like is that somebody's only job?Is that? That? Like? A
is like there one guy who doesthat or a woman. I don't want
(15:11):
to you know, whoever I'm with, I just can't see it being done
or I can't hear it, andI can't feel it. Like the cardboard
getting moved off of the cup islike nails on a chalkboard to me.
Wow. Yeah, So when theAmazon delivery driver comes to you, like
run upstairs and she says, no, it's just the coffee cup thing.
(15:33):
It's not all cardboard. Yeah,it's the sliding not not just cardboard in
general. Right, that's an oddlyspecific thing to be bothered by. But
if I had the funds to havea person unsleeve my beverages, sure I
would do that. But don't reallyget beverages that have sleeves. You don't.
(15:56):
But I mean, if you're superrich, sure I would love to
have somebody who has to lift andpour my fireball in my mouth for me.
That sounds great. I just hopeeverybody appreciated the greatness of Jimmy Kimmel
on display there. Yeah, whatdid he do? Funny jokes? He
just conducted that interview on a veryfunny, offhand way. Yeah. Yeah,
he kind of like was throwing itright back at her. How much
(16:19):
jewelry are you wearing? That itchanges your whole body temperature like that was
a good one. And she alwaysjust kind of smiled, but never like
she courtesy laughed for him because shedoesn't know. She doesn't really like it.
She doesn't really know much, soit's hard for her no much about
anything, so she can't really usewords very well. I think, Oh,
yeah, that's that's really weird tome. The cardboard around your coffee
(16:44):
driving you crazy? Yes, itis, and that has someone take it
off for her. Yeah, I'veactually noticed lately have you all been?
Have y'all gotten coffee lately? Likefrom a Starbucks? Are literally never in
my life? I think you're fresking. Oh well, the last couple of
times they didn't put the cardboard thingon my coffee loss, and I wonder
(17:06):
if it's because I said no tothe tip. Yeah, spill it.
Oh, I mean the coffee isalready like eight dollars. That's a lot
of dollars, So they only giveyou the cardboard if you tip. That's
what I was wondering. Possible.So are there any noises that make you
all crazy? Only at the moment, I would say, my doggy door
(17:30):
is the sound that I hate themost because it has like a magnetic thing
at the bottom, so the dogwalks out, and then when it's swinging
back through it's don't don't It doesabout three usually, yeah, because the
momentum swings it through the middle,back inside, back outside, and then
the swings Yeah. So I justhave to hear it. Yeah, sometimes
(17:51):
in the middle of the night,pretty much always somewhere around six thirty seven
am. H huh. I'm I'mthinking about moving and living in a different
room in my house and letting thedogs have the master. Yeah, and
I'll go to the guest. Thatsounds like a good plan, So I
don't have to hear that sounds likea good plan for me. It's only
(18:15):
one. What's that? As always, the sound of the female voice,
Oh, present company accepted. Okay, she's scooting away. She's gonna leave
me out here hanging on bad.But you know what, I don't care.
I've explained this away to you already. You just all female voices.
(18:37):
You hate him or you tune themout. He doesn't care both. You
just hear them for the vast majority. Let's say, has this been a
problem in relationships? What do youthink you're doing? Great? And then
(18:57):
you talk, you spoke. Ifyou could not do that would be better
women talking. Yeah, I meanyou're not wrong a lot of times,
but I wouldn't say like all ofthem say some but why just why just
(19:19):
women's voices just because they're too high? Like what about this one? Yeah?
What about this one? Very verysolid rhyming the whole country. Do
(19:41):
you like that voice mic a bitsomebody the female voice that Stonehenge Steve,
Yeah, yeah, very very solidrhyming. I did google the top ten
most annoying sounds. Yeah, wehave cards, they say. The fuzela
(20:06):
is one of the most soccer games. Yes, we got invented those during
whatever World Cup. What an asswhip? Just like and it never ends?
The emergency broadcast system sound. Don'tyou can't play that? It's very
(20:26):
you literally can't. Yeah. Ilearned that in a slideshow one day.
Yeah, I don't think too much. That was recent. Yeah, I
have more slideshows I think I haveto watch. You probably need to me
too, Gilbert Gottfreed, don't toworry anymore, I guess how about Skip
Bayless? Yeah yeah, stephen ASmith nails on a chalkboard. Yeah,
(20:52):
car alarms carl arms are so annoying. It is so funny to me.
No one on earth when they heara carl arm goes, what's going on
out there? We just go turnit off. It's literally there to keep
the car safe. But if anyonehears it, are all of our reactions
(21:15):
is just Jesus, Whose is that? Yeah? Not who's breaking in?
Well, because I bet eighty percentof the time it's just an accident.
Ninety of the time it's an accident. The dial up modem. We don't
have to hear that anymore. That'sit. I wonder I would like to
(21:37):
compare what she did to the soundof a dial up modem. I think
it's pretty good. That could bean audiobox. See how close was Julie
snoring? Cicadas? And Jim Carreyin Dumb and Dumb? I don't care.
Well he did. He said,you want to hear the most annoying
sound in the world. Oh right, He just goes, yea, yeah,
(22:00):
was that it? That was it? You have that so fast shoopy?
Oh it's a hockey. No,but I just knew where it was.
You're so fast draw the west.That's why he's Shoopy's amazing. That's
Hollywood swinging. Yay, we didit. Coming up next time for the
best damn sports segment period. Itis Game two against the Clippers tonight for
(22:22):
our Mavis. We'll talk to KevinGray pre and postgame Mavericks host right here
in ninety seven one and the Freak. We'll do that next
If you've ever been in an officeand had a real job, they had
phones, and on the bottom theywere little buttons. Each one of those
buttons was a separate line, soyou could put one on hold and click
to the next line. Each oneof those lines had a separate number.
I don't know, man, theworld definitely would not be better if we
got rid of all cell phones.Jeff's world might be, but our world,
(00:25):
the rest of us, it wouldnot be because you wouldn't be able
to get this input any other way. Love you. I listened to your
discussion about flip phones versus smartphones.I'm a couple of years from Reiner's age,
and I don't like the social media, but you can't live without a
(00:47):
smartphone. I have my plane tickets, my sports tickets, and Uber on
my smartphone. I don't think youcan do that on a flip It could
be easy. I'm ready in oneto free. Is he wrong, guys,
(01:07):
No, I don't think so.I think you get a You're gonna
have a smartphone to use these apps? I think probably maybe. I don't
know. I've had some phone along time. I don't know it's been
a while it has, But Iwant a dumb phone. All right,
I believe the Great Kevin Great,it's gonna be in here in just a
little bit and we'll ken dig alittle deeper on the Mavericks game and where
(01:30):
it all goes from here. Let'sback on track tonight, so stand by
for that. He'll get our headright for what's coming down tonight. He
better. Yeah, yeah, Kevin'sall wrong to get it right right now,
though, before we get to him, we've got this done for Hollywood
(01:51):
Swinging. Brought to you by AlamoDraft House Cinema. Thank you for welcome.
Thank you, Alamo Draft House Cinema. Yes, I'm going to tell
you about let's freaking chill coming upwith the Bin and Skin Show because there
are still some tickets available and thisis going to be a grand old time
(02:12):
on April thirtieth at the Alamo DraftHouse in Dentton. You can join the
Bin and Skin Show. And whenit's the beIN and Skin Show, you
know Christina is going to be there, and you know sweaty Man Steve is
going to be there. Cue.I didn't want to say that, so
I said, sweaty Man sweat Steve. Yeah, yeah, they're all going
(02:34):
to be there. How fun isthat you can watch mcgruber with all of
those crazy cats. Tickets just sevendollars for this space is limited. Get
your tickets while you still can atninety seven to one Thefreak dot Com.
Do it now, do it?Do it? Thank you, thank you.
So. Kim Kardashian went on JimmyKimmel this week, and it's not,
(03:00):
you know, any kind of bignews when Kim Kardashian goes on a
late night talk show. She doesthat all the time. But the topics
that they were discussing I thought werequite interesting. So what Kimmel had here
was a list of rumors that hadgone around about Kim Kardashian over the years,
(03:22):
and he had her agree to sitthere and say yes or no to
whether these rumors are true or not. By the way, Jimmy Kimmel,
Yeah, the best there is outthere at this right now. Yeah you
think so. I do. He'sgood. He's real funny. I like
him. And also with Letterman andLeno gone, yeah, it's really him
(03:46):
and follon these days right used tobe but competing with each other of those
who were out there doing it now. I think Kimmel's the best, just
a little bit. No, no, no rehabs you the wrong way.
She reminds me of a Sunday schoolteacher. He tries to be funny.
Oh like, who's like doing alittle skit for the students about Noah's ark
(04:10):
or whatever, trying to make jokes. Yeah, that's what he reminds me
of. Anyway, rupture, No, you're fine, You're fine. Uh
So some of these rumors that heasked her about, I actually hadn't heard.
I'm not like tracking all of theKim K rumors, and they don't
keep up with the kim stuff.I don't, I don't. I was
(04:32):
initially intrigued. We need somebody inhere. Who does I need a different
Hollywood rep. He's only on theTAA beat. No, I mean kim
K hasn't done much lately. Okay, Well, what are these rumors that
she's got out there? I actuallywas intrigued by this article, this story,
because you know, I thought maybeshe'd respond to the tailor disc track
(04:55):
she's not going to do that.But she didn't. He's not going to
ask her about that. He didn'task her about It's probably a very sensitive
subject. But no, he askedher about some of these crazy rumors,
and turns out she's real quirky,finicky, weird. And I don't know
if you get to a certain levelof celebrity where you can just make all
of these kind of bizarre requests ordecide that you need everything in your world
(05:16):
to be exactly right. Yes,but like you get more finicky because you
know you have the power to youdo it because you have people help make
sure that every little thing you comeinto contact with is exactly the way you
like it. You know, I'llexplain here with this audio this will all
make more sense to you. There'stwo cuts. We're going to fire through
(05:40):
a few of these rumors here inthis first cut, And I want to
see what you guys think. Isit true you blow dry your jewelry before
you put it on? Very true? Why do you do that? Because
I hate being freezing? And whenyou put on cold jewelry or like anything
with a zipper, I just Ineed it warm really, And then to
put it on. How much jewelryare you wearing that exchanges the temperature of
(06:01):
your bad or just like a meshmetal anything that's like a chain mail.
Yeah, when I wear a chainmail I understand. Yeah. That means
you wash your feet every night beforegetting into bed. I do. Good.
You sleep with your eyes slightly open? I do. How is that
possible? How do you know there'sfootage because my sisters have taken videos they
(06:26):
have yes, yes, and youdon't wake up with dry eyes from that?
No? No, right, okay, So I want to discuss these
three before we move on washing yourFeet's good? Y'all wash your feet before
bed? No? Not always?I mean I do it half assed foot
washing when I shower, Yeah,I will soap on my hand and I
(06:47):
run it on my feet. Yeah. If I shower, they get,
you know, whatever's on the outerpoor portion of them cleaned off. Do
you just let soap run down onyour body and assume your feet are cleaner?
Do you go down there? Don'tlie? Both? What if I
(07:10):
have cause to believe there's been alittle bit of a mess down there?
Have they been in well, eitherbeing a mess? You know, like
if I've been wandering around barefooted inmud or something like that. How often
is that? Not often? Whenyou get off work you'll frolic around in
some mud when you're looking for geese? And your looking for geese and then
(07:31):
running from them because they're evil.Not often, no, no, But
if you do happen to find yourselfin a muddy situation, then what you're
saying is that you will scrub yourfeet. Yes, I will, I'll
get them squared away before I goto bed. But only if you've been
running laps on a NASCAR dirt track. Yeah. Otherwise, and you're saying
(07:55):
you scrub your feet, I'd getthe top and maybe a little tap on
the ball them, but not much. What I'll do is I'll I'll have
the soap in my hands, andI will pick up the foot and kind
of run a hand on it,but not the soap bar, just the
hand with the soap. Did yourparents teach you to do that? They
didn't teach you to do anything LikeI'm feeling like I was never taught this.
(08:15):
Wait, you don't clean your feetat all? Not really. You
were disgusted. She doesn't have to. Yeah, they're not gross. I'm
in the same boat. You don'teven like every now and then, I'm
like, you don't, dude,like every now and yeah, you don't,
Okay, you don't. You guysdon't your feet no, nice.
Yeah, doesn't it tickle? No, no, it doesn't tickle because you're
(08:43):
hitting it with regular force, nota little. I hear the tickle.
You hear the pickle and the tackle. I do I fear both? Do
you fear every ackle? I fearthe pickle and the tickle. I don't
know if there's any other eckles,and I fear them. Oh yeah,
we all fear fear the sickle.So do you ever tickle the pickle?
(09:09):
What? What? What do youmean? What are you saying? You
know, go there and get youa nice you know, kosher dial.
Yes, I just kind of ticka little bit. Why would I do?
Why would anyone do that? You'rejust trying to cover for the dirty
thing you just said. No,I am not not. You know,
(09:33):
I wouldn't talk I wouldn't talk toyou about anything like that. Okay,
what do you what do you thinkwould happen with the kosher dell when it
was the little pickles? Like heI mean, I love the pickle.
I don't like the pickle. Idon't like the tickle, but I love
(09:56):
the pickle. If I'm just rankingit, yeah, I'm way higher on
the pickle than I am on thetickle, and if we're being honest,
the sickle probably comes in above you. Oh yeah, but what about a
woman who's fickle? Yeah, no, like fickle. No, but I
will take a nickel. Oh okay, yeah, oh maybe we should.
(10:24):
Maybe we need to scrub our underfeet. Guys are disgusting. You don't washers,
You like a nice drums sickle.You cannot tell us we're gross about
anything. I can't. You cannotwash your feet. You cannot. It's
the grossest part of your body.You wear socks and it's in a little
oven all day and it's walking aroundand it's funky. It washed in the
shower. Don't get washed. Waterhits them. Yes, that is washing.
(10:48):
I cannot scrub my underfeet. Itwill tickle too much. It won't
tickle because you're not tickling. You'rehitting it with good force. You're hitting
it with scrub force. Scrub horsedoesn't tickle, light touch, tickle,
scrub or so no tickle. Idon't believe it, and I'll never know
because I don't want to try it. I don't want to tickle myself.
(11:11):
Sounds so weird. Not what wouldhappen? You would not lie, You
just peel off layers of filth thatyou have on there. All right,
well, do I'm you own soap? Yes, you have soap in the
house. I have, but likeshower jewel, body wash. Oh god,
you are gross. Okay, youdon't even have real soap. Do
(11:33):
not come at me right now aboutbeing grosked. You don't even have soap.
You were the one that had everythingflying out of all of your portals
yesterday. Yeah, I bombed anddiaryhide yes, yeah, and what yeah
you know what else? I didwash my feet? No, you didn't.
Now you're just lying. I didwash my feet yesterday. I did
last night. I had a niceshower show, all right. I have
(11:58):
my bar so real soap, notthe mass produced crap. I got real
soap, and I gave it agood Yeah, gave it some of that.
You rub that bar soap all aroundand then you use it again,
and then you use it again,yes, and use it again. Correct.
Yeah, you rub that at thebottom of your feet and then the
next day you rub it around yourhead. Here's saying soap doesn't work.
(12:20):
I think both of y'all are gross, non foot wash. I can't decide
where I follow this. Yeah,you said that you only wash your underfeet
if you're playing in the mud onlyafter a pickup baseball game, barefoot frolicking
(12:41):
around a little field. All right. Well, the other thing Kim Kardashian
said that's weird of sleeping with hereyes a little bit open, is that
I think sometimes when you're in whateverlevel of sleep, like you can see
people's eyes kind of move a littlebit. Yeah, but I don't know
about just being perma kind of open, know, like major pain, Yeah,
(13:05):
major pain can do it. No, b what are you doing David
Wayne's Yeah, he beats up bambam, bigelow things to do the little
(13:26):
engine that could turns into a massacremurder story. And he's telling it to
a kid. That sounds very strange. I did have a friend in high
school. Her dad was a plasticsurgeon, and he he would, oh,
yeah, that's an expensive school missoo. Yeah yeah, uh well she
(13:46):
went high school and mazoo with me, and he would kind of like practice
on his wife sometimes practice plastic surgery. Yeah, like you'd try, like
you you know, nothing major,but like maybe there's like a face thing
where it's supposed to shed your skinand whatever. Whatever, and so she
(14:07):
did a lot of that, andshe came to visit us in college and
I remember looking over and she wassleeping with her eyes wide open because of
some procedures that she had just hadwhere she couldn't close her eyes. Got
the Jerry Jones where they just tightenit up behind your skull, hold it
all back, eyes wide open onthe little dorm bed. And I was
like, did she your mom?Did your mom? Did she have a
(14:28):
mask or anything? No, justlaying there with her eyes open and sleeping.
That's weird. Yeah. I wasscared that she was not with us
anymore, but she was, andshe's great and she's awesome. Okay,
so those are some weird Kim Kardashianthings. Let's let the rest of this
audio play out, because there's more. You celebrated your fourteenth birthday at never
(14:50):
Land Ranch. I did. That'scrazy? Oh wow, you have someone
take the Starbucks leeve off your coffeebecause you hate the sound of card and
I, yes, that's true.And I hate the feeling is that a
like is that somebody's only job?Is that? That? Like? A
is like there one guy who doesthat or a woman. I don't want
(15:11):
to you know, whoever I'm with, I just can't see it being done
or I can't hear it, andI can't feel it. Like the cardboard
getting moved off of the cup islike nails on a chalkboard to me.
Wow. Yeah, So when theAmazon delivery driver comes to you, like
run upstairs and she says, no, it's just the coffee cup thing.
(15:33):
It's not all cardboard. Yeah,it's the sliding not not just cardboard in
general. Right, that's an oddlyspecific thing to be bothered by. But
if I had the funds to havea person unsleeve my beverages, sure I
would do that. But don't reallyget beverages that have sleeves. You don't.
(15:56):
But I mean, if you're superrich, sure I would love to
have somebody who has to lift andpour my fireball in my mouth for me.
That sounds great. I just hopeeverybody appreciated the greatness of Jimmy Kimmel
on display there. Yeah, whatdid he do? Funny jokes? He
just conducted that interview on a veryfunny, offhand way. Yeah. Yeah,
he kind of like was throwing itright back at her. How much
(16:19):
jewelry are you wearing? That itchanges your whole body temperature like that was
a good one. And she alwaysjust kind of smiled, but never like
she courtesy laughed for him because shedoesn't know. She doesn't really like it.
She doesn't really know much, soit's hard for her no much about
anything, so she can't really usewords very well. I think, Oh,
yeah, that's that's really weird tome. The cardboard around your coffee
(16:44):
driving you crazy? Yes, itis, and that has someone take it
off for her. Yeah, I'veactually noticed lately have you all been?
Have y'all gotten coffee lately? Likefrom a Starbucks? Are literally never in
my life? I think you're fresking. Oh well, the last couple of
times they didn't put the cardboard thingon my coffee loss, and I wonder
(17:06):
if it's because I said no tothe tip. Yeah, spill it.
Oh, I mean the coffee isalready like eight dollars. That's a lot
of dollars, So they only giveyou the cardboard if you tip. That's
what I was wondering. Possible.So are there any noises that make you
all crazy? Only at the moment, I would say, my doggy door
(17:30):
is the sound that I hate themost because it has like a magnetic thing
at the bottom, so the dogwalks out, and then when it's swinging
back through it's don't don't It doesabout three usually, yeah, because the
momentum swings it through the middle,back inside, back outside, and then
the swings Yeah. So I justhave to hear it. Yeah, sometimes
(17:51):
in the middle of the night,pretty much always somewhere around six thirty seven
am. H huh. I'm I'mthinking about moving and living in a different
room in my house and letting thedogs have the master. Yeah, and
I'll go to the guest. Thatsounds like a good plan, So I
don't have to hear that sounds likea good plan for me. It's only
(18:15):
one. What's that? As always, the sound of the female voice,
Oh, present company accepted. Okay, she's scooting away. She's gonna leave
me out here hanging on bad.But you know what, I don't care.
I've explained this away to you already. You just all female voices.
(18:37):
You hate him or you tune themout. He doesn't care both. You
just hear them for the vast majority. Let's say, has this been a
problem in relationships? What do youthink you're doing? Great? And then
(18:57):
you talk, you spoke. Ifyou could not do that would be better
women talking. Yeah, I meanyou're not wrong a lot of times,
but I wouldn't say like all ofthem say some but why just why just
(19:19):
women's voices just because they're too high? Like what about this one? Yeah?
What about this one? Very verysolid rhyming the whole country. Do
(19:41):
you like that voice mic a bitsomebody the female voice that Stonehenge Steve,
Yeah, yeah, very very solidrhyming. I did google the top ten
most annoying sounds. Yeah, wehave cards, they say. The fuzela
(20:06):
is one of the most soccer games. Yes, we got invented those during
whatever World Cup. What an asswhip? Just like and it never ends?
The emergency broadcast system sound. Don'tyou can't play that? It's very
(20:26):
you literally can't. Yeah. Ilearned that in a slideshow one day.
Yeah, I don't think too much. That was recent. Yeah, I
have more slideshows I think I haveto watch. You probably need to me
too, Gilbert Gottfreed, don't toworry anymore, I guess how about Skip
Bayless? Yeah yeah, stephen ASmith nails on a chalkboard. Yeah,
(20:52):
car alarms carl arms are so annoying. It is so funny to me.
No one on earth when they heara carl arm goes, what's going on
out there? We just go turnit off. It's literally there to keep
the car safe. But if anyonehears it, are all of our reactions
(21:15):
is just Jesus, Whose is that? Yeah? Not who's breaking in?
Well, because I bet eighty percentof the time it's just an accident.
Ninety of the time it's an accident. The dial up modem. We don't
have to hear that anymore. That'sit. I wonder I would like to
(21:37):
compare what she did to the soundof a dial up modem. I think
it's pretty good. That could bean audiobox. See how close was Julie
snoring? Cicadas? And Jim Carreyin Dumb and Dumb? I don't care.
Well he did. He said,you want to hear the most annoying
sound in the world. Oh right, He just goes, yea, yeah,
(22:00):
was that it? That was it? You have that so fast shoopy?
Oh it's a hockey. No,but I just knew where it was.
You're so fast draw the west.That's why he's Shoopy's amazing. That's
Hollywood swinging. Yay, we didit. Coming up next time for the
best damn sports segment period. Itis Game two against the Clippers tonight for
(22:22):
our Mavis. We'll talk to KevinGray pre and postgame Mavericks host right here
in ninety seven one and the Freak. We'll do that next
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