Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Be my physician.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
He said, you're definitely ill than to the nurse. I've
seen worse than the doctor.
Speaker 1 (00:09):
Just gave me a pill.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Take one of those three times today. You don't never
stop on till you're really denner awful. Better keep out
of the region children. The thing is that some side effects,
you mean, the probably will well. Limits of fact, you
can't come. I'll give you one out of the film.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
On top of that, on top of that, on top
of that, on top of that, on top of that,
on top of that, and then he showed me his bill.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
I've popped another pill.
Speaker 4 (00:36):
Welcome to When Your Health Matters. Your host is doctor
Richard Huntoon of Advanced Alternative Medicine Center located right here
in Pool of Georgia. Doctor Hantoon has been practicing alternative health,
utilizing chiropractic and many other health techniques for the past
twenty seven years. To support you when your health matters.
It's his intention to offer practical advice every week for
(00:57):
you to consider and to apply in your own life
to make your life and the lives of your family
and friends healthier and happier. When you have questions, you'll
get your answers from doctor Rick himself or another expert
on the show. Being empowered to make positive health choices
before problem arises is the best way to approach health,
and doctor Rick promises to have information for you every
(01:17):
week that will allow you to become proactive and empowered
to take control of your health and your life.
Speaker 5 (01:23):
You are listening to the Alternative Healthcare Network.
Speaker 6 (01:27):
Welcome to this week's show, When Your Health Matters, the
show designed to empower you to better health through knowledge
and education. And I'm your host, doctor Richard Untun from
Advanced Alternative Medicine Center, and here's my partner for the show,
your health advocate, Mark Saved.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
Greg. It's really a pleasure to be able to sit
down here and have, I think in a very important
chat with you today that I think is relevant to
just about everybody that might be listening to our show today,
and that is the topic of death. And it's a
topic that has become really off limits. And I don't
even quite understand why death is a topic that we
(02:03):
avoid so rigorously.
Speaker 7 (02:06):
Is it off limits?
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Mark, Well, it seems to be. In polite society, it's
not something that people regularly talk about, and yet everybody
needs to deal with it at some level. Right.
Speaker 6 (02:16):
I speak to people all the time about the next
step and the eternity of the soul and the end
of the physical vehicle that we call the body, and
I help people lower their fear levels around the topic
of death and that we don't need to be afraid
of it. It's just the natural stage. And what the
natural next step is in a person's quote, life is
(02:36):
the end of that particular lifetime. And you know, and
if you approach end of life with a positive outlook
and an anticipation of what comes next, then it doesn't
have to be something that is off limits or creates
(02:57):
fear or any of those things. And I just think
it's important for people to understand that it is a
natural part of life and it comes at the end
of what we call life. And you know, like you said,
everybody is going to have to confront it at some point,
(03:19):
and we want you to confront it with the openness
and a healthy outlook towards it and without regret.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Yeah, I mean, it is inevitable. So why I avoid
the topic at all?
Speaker 6 (03:31):
Exactly? I personally embrace it. I know it's not my time,
it won't be for a number of years ninety more hopefully,
and like not falling off the tree, it's there's the
beginning of a new life and the end of the
attachment to the mother tree, and so they get to
go off on whatever the next adventure is. And we
(03:53):
know about the finite, we know about our physical life,
and you know, the trepidation around well, what comes next
than the lack of understanding of what comes next. I
can understand that would create trepidation. But I wouldn't ask
you to worry about death. I would ask you to
concentrate more on living life and death will come soon enough,
(04:16):
and it's not something that you have to worry about
because it's inevitable.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
It's inevitable. Is also one of the most, maybe the
most personal experience you might have.
Speaker 6 (04:26):
I guess you could see it that way. And every
moment of every day is and should be deeply personable,
and after all, it is your life, and so you
should experience it and take it personally.
Speaker 1 (04:39):
So what is the value in looking into this subject
of death?
Speaker 6 (04:45):
Just simply to be prepared physically, mentally, emotionally, and to
help get your affairs in order for the time that
when it finally does arrive and not leaving burdens for
the people that survive you, your family members or loved
ones or whatever.
Speaker 7 (05:01):
You know, you want.
Speaker 6 (05:02):
To tidy everything up so that it's the least inconvenience whatsoever.
If you know that the time is coming, et cetera,
take the time to give your stuff away to the
people that you wanted to have while you're alive, so
that they can thank you for you giving them that,
(05:22):
and just empty things out and hold on to what
you believe is to be absolutely necessary.
Speaker 7 (05:29):
Until you do take your last breath.
Speaker 6 (05:31):
But I mean, you know, if if you're not driving
anymore and you still have a car, well, why don't
you give the car to somebody that can use it
versus having it sit in your garage and take up space,
et cetera because you're not even using it anymore.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
Now, should the fact that we all die be a
reason for us to appreciate life more.
Speaker 6 (05:50):
That's an excellent perspective and one that we could all
benefit from considering, but not everybody does all the time.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
It also seems that for people, staying alive is the
most important thing, or really, is there more to consider
than that?
Speaker 6 (06:05):
Well, staying alive to fulfill the purpose of why you
are here and complete the mission, so to speak, is
most important thing. Are you being a good human being?
Are you helping other humans with your efforts?
Speaker 7 (06:18):
You know, the purpose of.
Speaker 6 (06:19):
Being a human being is to help other human beings,
and the number one on that list of human beings
that you need to help that would be yourself.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
And it seems like that. You know that mainstream medicine
is viewing depth kind of as the enemy, and it's
doing preserving life at all costs. But sometimes the way
that they're preserving somebody to be alive, whether they're in
a vegetative state or something on machines, that seems almost
more cruel than it would be to let somebody deal
(06:51):
with the inevitable in their own time.
Speaker 6 (06:53):
And that's one hundred percent correct. But appreciate that mainstream
medicine is here to help people remain in their box
for as long as they can help. If you die,
they no longer serve their purpose as a practitioner and
as an association.
Speaker 7 (07:08):
And so.
Speaker 6 (07:10):
I guess what's important. And you may ask these questions
a little bit later in the show, but I guess
it's important to be abundantly clear in terms of what
your wishes are for what you want to do with
your life, and if you get to a place. I mean,
I have had conversations with my wife. If something happens
to me and I'm in a quote vegetative state, my
(07:33):
body is still functioning, but my brain is gone, please
pull the plug. I'm sorry that you would have to
make that decision, So let me make that decision for you.
Speaker 7 (07:45):
Just pull the damn plug.
Speaker 6 (07:46):
I don't want to sit there and you know, put
a financial burden on you, because the people that are
quote keeping me alive are just counting their revenue that
is going to be coming in because I'm still alive.
Speaker 7 (07:59):
No favorite, pull the plug.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
Yeah, it's a tough decision, and I do think there
are legal mechanisms for people to make those decisions that
at the point when you are able to make a
decision or not after an event such as could be
a tragic event in your life.
Speaker 6 (08:15):
Well yeah, I mean there are ethical considerations. I've always
made my care one hundred percent about the other person.
I'm there for the individuals seeking care. It is for
them that I serve, and.
Speaker 7 (08:30):
They need that.
Speaker 6 (08:33):
They need to understand that their life is one hundred
percent about them and their choices about what they choose
to do is within their own life. They can either
choose to get well or they continue to suffer with
their health condition.
Speaker 7 (08:45):
But it's their choice.
Speaker 6 (08:47):
I'm here to support whatever choice it is that they make,
and that's it, trying to help improve their health. And
it would be no different if I was. You know,
I have a patient friend who is called a death Duela,
and she's literally there all the way up to the end,
supporting the person to get through whatever it is that
(09:10):
they need to get through. And you know, she's been
holding the hand of somebody while they transition out of
the body. And it's a miraculous experience to listen to
her describe it and what it is that she experiences
when that occurs. And I would just ask all the
listeners to do it consciously in terms of with intention
(09:36):
that this is how I would choose my life to end.
And you know, in some way, shape or form, set
your intentions so strong that you actually begin to plan
for it to be that way. Accidents happen, and consequences
of those accidents happen. But I think it's important for
(09:59):
all of us human beings to when we are of
sound mind and body, that we make understandings and to
make our wishes documented and well understood in terms of
what it is that you would like to occur when
it gets to the end of your life.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
So how do you go about helping somebody who maybe
has received a terminal diagnosis and is facing the inevitable
on a timeline that they didn't plan on.
Speaker 6 (10:29):
Support them, listen to them, talk with them about their life,
and help them to see the value in their diagnosis.
As God does not make mistakes, co creating your life
experience as a gift to the Creator is important for
all of us. And I would just say to love
them where they are and to have compassion for them,
(10:51):
and to just be a loving support to what it
is that they're experiencing. Because nobody wants to die alone.
So take the time to be there for the person,
hold the space for them, and let them feel a
sense of value, but also give them the understanding that
(11:13):
it's okay if it's time for them to go. I
had to do that with my cat from I was
sitting on a beach in the Caribbean when my cat
it was time to tell.
Speaker 7 (11:26):
The vet, yeah, it's.
Speaker 6 (11:29):
Time for her to go, and you can do whatever
you need to do, but please do it in a
way that she's if you make it so that she's
not suffering. And I felt terrible because the last thing
I said to my cat before I went on this
particular vacation was I would love for you to be
here when I get home. And I understand if.
Speaker 7 (11:52):
You have to go, that you can go, and I will.
Speaker 6 (11:57):
Be sorry that I will have missed you when you go.
Oh but there are a lot of times where you know,
somebody's got a terminal diagnosis and they're laying in bed
and their whole family gathers around and this, that and
the other thing, and they're just like, Okay, we're going
to go get some to eat and we'll come back
when we're done.
Speaker 7 (12:13):
And they leave the room. And then two minutes later
the person dies.
Speaker 6 (12:17):
Why because they said they're goodbyes. And you know, you can,
you can drag it out for an eternity, But when
you've said everything that needs to be said, and you've
communicated your your feelings and the connection that you have
with them, and there's really nothing more that needs to
be said, it's it's okay. My personal belief system is
(12:39):
we're going to see everybody again anyway.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
Are there are there special modalities that you have that
you use when you're dealing with somebody that's in that state.
Speaker 6 (12:50):
Well, I use all the tools I have available to
support on an individual to live their best life possible,
regardless of where they are in their condition that they have,
and to embrace more life even if they are dying.
And it's it's it's important.
Speaker 1 (13:05):
You know.
Speaker 6 (13:06):
I've had lots of patients that have died under my
care and it's not fun and it's saddening and it's disheartening,
and and you know, I think about what I could
have done differently, But I also know that guess what
each person's journey is one hundred percent controlled by them. Yes,
(13:29):
different people come in and out of your lives, and
you can have different people, you know, that are partnering
with you and try to support you and try to,
you know, to keep things moving in the right direction.
And every single one of the patients that I've had
that have ultimately died while they were a patient in
my office due to the circumstances of whatever their situation was,
(13:55):
you know, the family members associated with them being a
patient in my office have all had nothing but wonderful
things and a huge gratitude for the love and care
that I showed their loved one that's no longer here,
and that always makes me feel good. But at the
end of the day, I still feel bad that, you know,
(14:17):
the person's life came to an end.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
So how do you tell you, Taylor, your approach to
caring for them and a patient's individual needs and preferences.
Speaker 7 (14:27):
I ask them specifically.
Speaker 6 (14:30):
I asked their body specifically what it needs, and I
support it based on what the body is asking for,
and I solve the imbalance that they present with and
even by giving them the best that they you know,
I just want them to be at peace with whatever
(14:50):
it is that they're dealing with. The patient that most
acutely comes to mind was a patient friend of mine.
His name was Joe, and he came to me as
a referral from his oncologist with advanced stage four pancreatic cancer.
And I helped turn that bus around for.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
You know.
Speaker 6 (15:12):
I helped him gain a whole bunch of weight after
he had lost over one hundred pounds. I got him
from being confined to a wheelchair and needing physically helped
to be put into the chair to where he was
walking without a walker, without a cane, without all of it,
and he had turned to himself around completely, and then
(15:34):
they felt he was strong enough to undergo a surgical procedure,
and unfortunately the surgical procedure is what ultimately cost him
his life. But when I went to his funeral, I
had five hundred strangers coming up to me and thanking
me for the time that.
Speaker 7 (15:50):
I gave Joe.
Speaker 6 (15:52):
I gave them with Joe before Joe's passing, and everybody
was very grateful for the work that I had done,
and so much gratitude that it for me was uncomfortable
accepting all this gratitude from people for just simply doing
my job.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
Now, do you ever collaborate with something like you mentioned
the death doula? But what about what the hospice or
palliative care directly?
Speaker 7 (16:23):
Not really.
Speaker 6 (16:23):
I have a ninety four year old patient who had
a stroke during COVID and I was prohibited from helping
her because the facility did not want me.
Speaker 7 (16:31):
Helping her get well.
Speaker 6 (16:33):
She now is at home with a home health aid
who takes care of her and helps to get her
more active. And when the time comes that she decides
that she's done, I'm sure hospice will come in, or
she may just choose to pass away without all the hooplah.
That's probably more like what she will do. Knowing I mean,
(16:54):
I've known her for thirty years, and so I would
imagine that that's ultimately what will happen with her. But
you know, everybody has to make their own way out, and.
Speaker 7 (17:09):
I collaborate with anybody.
Speaker 6 (17:11):
Who happens to be involved in the care and welfare
of my patient, whether it's a family member, whether it's
a health aid, whether it's a nurse, whether it's another doctor,
whatever the case happens to be, I'm part of their
support team.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
And so is there a difference between what hospice is
and what palliative care is.
Speaker 6 (17:31):
Palliative care is for the end of the procedure and
recovering to participate in life. Hospice care is for end
of life and supporting the person and transition gracefully and
hopefully peacefully. So palliative care is about recovery and hospice
(17:52):
care is about making the person comfortable.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
Well, this is a really a very fascinating and important
conversation we're having today doctrit. We need to take a
short commercial break to hear from our sponsor, the Alternative
Healthcare Network dot com. But when we get back, I
want to go further with this conversation about end of
life and get into some of the end of life
regrets that a lot of people suffer from.
Speaker 6 (18:13):
Absolutely, but please listen to this commercial from our general sponsor.
You're listening to the Alternative Healthcare Network dot com.
Speaker 5 (18:20):
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Speaker 6 (18:24):
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(18:48):
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Speaker 5 (18:51):
You are listening to the Alternative Healthcare Network.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
When someone goes into palliat into Hossa's care, what kind
of support do they get from them?
Speaker 6 (19:02):
A hospice care is supportive care with the primary goal
of comfort and quality of life. For patients with a
terminal illness and a life expectancy of six months or
less as certified by a physician.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
Can somebody leave hospice if their health improves.
Speaker 6 (19:20):
I imagine so it doesn't normally happen as being placed
on hospices for those who are coming to the end
of their life.
Speaker 7 (19:30):
But I suppose anything's possible now.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
In terms of what you do with people, What kind
of ongoing support do you offer as someone's illness progresses? Well.
Speaker 6 (19:40):
I do everything I can to assist a person to
maintain their health and life until it isn't possible. I
had a wonderful patient who passed away. At one point,
he was discharged from the hospital because there was nothing
more that they could offer. I went to his house
and he was simply lying in the bed, not engaging
(20:03):
with anyone, and I did my treatment for him for
what was required, and within fifteen minutes or so, he
was sitting up and complaining about what was on the
television and that he was hungry. I was happy he
was responding and knew he wouldn't be with us much longer.
I told him that I would be back in about
(20:24):
six days if he was still living. By then, and
unfortunately he died the following afternoon, but he did it
in his body and in his much better place than
when I had walked into his house. So he died
gracefully and without suffering, and that in itself was a blessing.
And he came to visit me in a dream three
(20:45):
days later, and he was in a much younger state.
He was driving a car that was appropriate for the
time of his life when he was that age, and
he invited me to get in the car because he
was going to take me to go fishing with him,
because when he was in my care he just kept asking,
(21:05):
you know, when am I going to be able to
go fishing again? And I'm like, well, you've got to
understand what we're up against, and I'd like to get
you there, and I'm glad that you're you're inspired to
want to get there, but we've got work to do.
And so it was fascinating to have him come visit
me in a dream driving a car that I had
never seen. And when I did go to his funeral,
(21:29):
there was a picture of that car that he showed
up with in my dream, and that in itself was.
Speaker 7 (21:35):
It's just it was.
Speaker 6 (21:37):
It was fascinating the experience that I had, but it
just told me that that, you know, our connection was
genuine and uh, you know, just the way that that
God helps people transition through circumstances, both on that side
of the veil and and on this side of the veil.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
As a caregiver and working with people who are in
these various conditions, what do you do to support somebody
or support somebody as a caregiver who is dealing with
somebody at the end of life, Because people do burn
out sometimes in this kind of occupation.
Speaker 6 (22:13):
They do, and so what I would encourage them is
to have a life outside of work and live your
life as fully as possible when not working and as
well as when you are working.
Speaker 7 (22:24):
Being an example for the people to emulate.
Speaker 6 (22:26):
And there are challenges in what I do with helping
the people that I help, and there are certainly days
that are better than other days, but at the end
of the day, I just have gratitude for the opportunity
to help facilitate a better outcome for the people that
I get to deal with. And so yeah, it's important
(22:49):
to just have the right attitude and always have the
ability to recycle and come back fresh, and whether that
requires you to take a vacation, if that requires you
to have a regular routine where you have the ability
to go exercise your stress out, if that means going
(23:10):
for counseling yourself and having somebody that can help create
you know, balance and harmony within you by having somebody
to talk to about it and takes an objective perspective
about what you're dealing with. You know, it's all of
it's about caring for self, especially if you helped care
(23:31):
for others.
Speaker 1 (23:33):
Now, let's talk about when you have to deal with families,
because I'm sure you deal with families that are going
through these things, and you talk about home business that
you've done. What are healthy ways for families and the
family members to talk about the death when they're all together.
Speaker 6 (23:50):
Simply create the space and hold the energy is supporting
each to express what they're feeling about their loved ones
life coming to an end and celebrate what they mean
to you personally and what you've gotten from the relationship.
And if there's any anger associated with at the end
(24:10):
of a person's life, it may be important to express
that anger, maybe not at the person whose life is
coming to an end, but just to express how you
felt about the circumstances or the dynamic of the relationship
that didn't end the way that you would have liked
it to end. And you know, it's just as important
(24:32):
for you to be able to express how you feel
in order for you to turn the page and move
on with your life as it is for the person
whose life is coming to an end.
Speaker 1 (24:42):
What about with children. Is there a difference in how
you would deal with a child that is contending with
losing a family member.
Speaker 6 (24:49):
Well, for me, my perspective has always been is simply
to be honest about it and support them to deal
with the reality and the circumstances and let them know
you will see your loved one again at some point.
And you know, you watch TV programs or see movies
and this, that and the other thing, and you don't
(25:12):
you're not transparent with the child because you don't think
the child can handle it. You don't know what the
child can handle. And I don't know that it's appropriate
for you to shield them so much. I think it
would be important for you to have a conversation with
them about the fact that this particular person's life came
(25:33):
to an end and what that means instead of you know,
I remember from the scene in Forrest Gump, and I
realized that the application of that is not exactly what
we're talking about. But you know, I remember the doctor
that came over to evaluate Forrest, and he was basically
going to have an illicit affair with Missus Gump to
(25:56):
get the approval so that Forrest could go to public schooling.
And you know, the character asks Sally Field's character, you know,
is there a mister Missus Gump? And she kind of
stalls and kind of looks at him and says, he's
on vacation.
Speaker 7 (26:13):
And it's just like.
Speaker 6 (26:14):
I've seen a lot of people say that your dad's
on a special mission and he's on vacation, or you know,
when Charlie Kirk passed, they were talking about, well, how
do you tell your kids that your dad died this,
that and the other thing, and it's just like, well,
he's continuing his mission by going and serving with Jesus,
and that's where dad always wanted to be kind of thing.
(26:35):
And so it's just, you know, I don't think you
need to sugarcoat it. I think that you need to
just be honest, because when you start being dishonest with
your kids, and then your kids learn the truth, then
they're going to be like, well, that wasn't the story
that I was told. And then there's trauma again around
a situation that should have been healed when it happened.
Speaker 1 (27:00):
Thing true for friends or supporting somebody who's terminally ill,
I mean, they don't have that family connection, but they
may be needing to help support somebody through that transition. Right.
Speaker 6 (27:10):
You don't want to be intrusive. You ask what can
be done. People generally bring food and simply hold space,
and it is the best thing to do to be
supportive and to have an empathetic ear if needed.
Speaker 7 (27:23):
But take the time to understand.
Speaker 6 (27:27):
And you can qualify by saying, you know, listen, I
know this is tough time, and I know that there's
probably a lot of it that you want to go
through by yourself. And what can I do to support that?
Do you want me to leave you alone? Do you
want me to hold space? Do you want me to
get your food? Do you want me to just chick
in on you every.
Speaker 7 (27:44):
Once in a while? What would you like?
Speaker 6 (27:47):
And they may tell you that they have no idea
what they want because they're too caved in by the situation,
and so that person I would just you know, probably
spend more time in their presence than not in their presence.
But when a person knows that they just need their space,
hopefully they'll have the courage to say, listen, I just
need a little bit of space. And you know, I'm
(28:08):
not telling you that I don't care about you or
that I don't want your help. I just there's an
aspect of this that I need to do for myself.
Speaker 8 (28:15):
M Now, when making decisions and of life type decisions,
how important a factor should the quality of life be
in making those decisions.
Speaker 6 (28:26):
I think it's the only factor to truly consider. Quality
is so more important than quantity, and we need to
understand that, and we need to embrace that. You know,
they'll they'll do end of life decisions that sustain a
person and keep them alive longer than maybe the person
would want to be alive. And you know, that's why
(28:47):
I think it's really abundantly clear that you put together
what your wishes are, and I would ask people to
be a little bit.
Speaker 7 (28:57):
More absolute and.
Speaker 6 (28:59):
What it is that they want by sitting in front
of a video camera. Yeah, everybody has a phone with
a video camera in it. Good videotape yourself telling your
loved ones what your last wishes are for what happens
after you pass, and then send that to an attorney,
(29:20):
or send that to your family members. Send it to
more than one person, so that you know at the
end of the day they have an understanding of what
it is that you want. I told my parents when
they were having a conversation with me if I would
be okay if my youngest brother was made the executor
of their estate, had anything happened, And I was like, no,
(29:42):
that's totally fine, I said, But at the end of
the day, don't just put it in writing.
Speaker 7 (29:47):
I think you should go home and make a.
Speaker 6 (29:48):
Video of what you want, because you can't misinterpret what
somebody's words are when you watch the words come out
of their mouth. But you can misinterpret what's been written
on paper if it isn't written in a clear way,
and God knows, attorneys can interpret things to be different
from what was the true meaning behind what was said.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
Yep, that can happen. As a healer, what's the role
to help somebody through the emotional journey of living and dying?
Speaker 6 (30:20):
As a healer, It's my job is to meet the
person where they are. It's important to just support the
person where they're at with what you have and what
you can offer to them. You know, I believe it
(30:41):
is the role of a good healer to support the
people as much as you possibly can, which is why
I have the trainings and techniques that help me to
do just that. So I try to be the best
healer that I can possibly be because I understand and
that the people that I serve, it's not about me
(31:03):
at all, It's one hundred percent about them.
Speaker 1 (31:05):
So how do you help your patients with their end
of life decisions? I mean we're talking about that. You
seem to have a good perspective on what people should consider.
Speaker 6 (31:16):
Yeah, I just try to be with them and listen
to what they want and to refrain from making any
of it about me and and what my wants is
and needs are, and and it's it's it's again. It's
it's about holding space, and it's about being selfless in
their final hour of need and their final minutes of
(31:39):
need and their at their end of life need. I
want them to leave their life feeling that they were
supported in their life because there's so many people that that.
I mean, we talked at the beginning. The title of
the show is End of Life Decisions and Regrets. There
(32:00):
are so many regrets that people have at the end
of life, and the last thing that I want to
do is communicate anything that would give them another regret.
So I try to say what I need to say
to people when they're in my presence, so that if
God forbid something happens, then I don't see them again.
Speaker 7 (32:23):
We ended the last communication that we had.
Speaker 6 (32:28):
Very clear and concise in terms of what our relationship is,
and hopefully it's always done, you know, with a sense
of love.
Speaker 1 (32:38):
Yeah, I mean, we were talking about things like that
do not resuscitate order or that somebody might choose, or
the explicit orders that either on a videotape you might want,
or the written orders or you know, last wills in
case somebody can't communicate during those last moments, and deciding
who's going to be making those decisions. But another thing
(33:00):
about potential end of life would be somebody that's decided
to end their life deliberately, something like assistant suicide. What
are your perspectives on that kind of choice?
Speaker 6 (33:14):
My perspective is is that the person wants to be
assisted in ending their life on their terms.
Speaker 7 (33:22):
Honor it.
Speaker 6 (33:25):
Who am I to say, how you want to end
your life. It's not my life, it's yours. This is
what you want to do. Okay, I may have you
write something out that said that, please don't hold me
responsible because you asked me to.
Speaker 7 (33:42):
Help you to end your life.
Speaker 6 (33:44):
And I chose to honor that, you know, just to
cover my butt because when the authorities come to find out, well,
what was the circumstances of you dying, and I say, well,
he took his life, and they're like, well, why didn't
you stop him? Well, it's very simple. Letter here says
that he wanted to end his life and that I
was here as a witness to him ending his life,
(34:05):
and he asked me for my help, So I helped them.
That's what else could I do as a loving fellow
human being is to assist the person. The purpose of
being a human being is to help other human beings.
And if that's the request that you would have for me, yeah,
it would be sad, but I would also feel honored
(34:27):
that you felt enough of me to ask me to
help you end your life.
Speaker 7 (34:34):
So I would honor it.
Speaker 1 (34:37):
Well. I mean, I know that there are particular legal
requirements depending on where you are the states, and there
are actually protocols that are actually established for people to
do that. They have to have a diagnosis, like a
hospice diagnosis of under six months to live, and then
they actually help them find a mechanical ways to actually
(35:01):
go about it. Right, that wouldn't be something that you
would do. That would be something that the patient would
have to do themselves.
Speaker 6 (35:08):
Yeah, the patient and the family members would have to
do themselves. But if they are a patient and they
don't have any other family members and they're asking for
my help, I will consult with the people that I
know that deal with end of life's situations and I
will ask them, you know, what do you recommend? What
(35:31):
is your experience with what is the best way to
go about And again, I'm going to honor the request
of the person who's asking me to help them make
the conscious choice to end their own life. And I'm
going to have them do it with dignity, and I'm
going to have them do it with love and compassion,
(35:52):
and I'm going to help them feel supported because sometimes
people go through life and one of the burdens that
they carry is the fact that they never felt supported.
So the least I can do is support them at
their end of life's decision.
Speaker 1 (36:06):
Yeah yeah, well again, this is a very important conversation
we're having today, Doc Gric. We do need to take
a short commercial break to hear from our general sponsor,
the Alternative Healthcare Network dot com. When we get back,
I want to talk to you about some of the
things that also played people at those last latter times
in their lives.
Speaker 6 (36:25):
Absolutely, but listen to this commercial from our general sponsor.
You're listening to the Alternative Healthcare Network dot com.
Speaker 5 (36:32):
You are listening to the Alternative Healthcare Network.
Speaker 6 (36:36):
If you're currently suffering from any health concern and you're
not getting the results you're looking for, please feel free
to call me directly at area code eight four five
five six one two two two five again eight four
five five six one two two two five, or you
can email me directly at Doc Gric at spine boy
dot that's Doc Riick at spine boy dot com, and
(36:58):
I look forward to serving your health care needs naturally.
Speaker 5 (37:03):
You are listening to the Alternative health Care.
Speaker 1 (37:05):
Network dealing with this whole end of life question, how
do you address the spiritual or existential concerns that someone
has at the end of life.
Speaker 6 (37:14):
Well, it's pretty simple. I support the person to know
they are going to the afterlife and it will be magnificent.
Help them make peace with the life that they are
leaving and to go knowing they did the best they
could where they were with what they had at.
Speaker 7 (37:29):
The time, and we all do.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
I don't know.
Speaker 6 (37:32):
Anybody that purposely does a bad life for themselves. Everybody
is making the best they can where they are with
what they have. And it doesn't necessarily mean that everybody's
life is the same, because obviously everybody's life isn't the same.
But I've had experiences where people that have next to
(37:55):
nothing seem to have the one thing that I personally
am on a journey to find, and that's a sense
of peace. And you know, there are people in this
world that have next to nothing that have found peace,
and I don't want to say that I'm envious of them,
but I I am trying to take the lead and
(38:20):
the experience that they have demonstrated in my witnessing their
level of peace, and that's the most important thing for
me at this stage of my life is just to
get a place, get to a place of just being
at peace.
Speaker 1 (38:36):
Mm hm, Well that sort of leads me to my
next question, which is, you know, how does your attitude
affect the possibility of a peaceful transition.
Speaker 6 (38:44):
I would expect that a person gets to choose their
way of leaving, and attitude is their choice, and hopefully
it's a peaceful attitude when it does finally happen, I
think that we all need to make peace with our
particular circumstances in or for us to leave our body.
Speaker 7 (39:02):
And until we make peace, it doesn't happen.
Speaker 6 (39:04):
Now, it could show up for three seconds just before
you take your last breath, But I think in order
for you to take your last breath and let go
of the physical vehicle that we occupy in our body,
I think we have to get to a place of peace.
Speaker 1 (39:19):
Well, isn't that kind of the ultimate letting go?
Speaker 6 (39:23):
Yes, it is, and that's the whole point. I would
think that we would have to get to that level
of peace in order for us to let go of
the bodies that we were all born into.
Speaker 1 (39:35):
Now, what can make the transition at this point more difficult?
Speaker 6 (39:40):
I would think the word would be regrets and not
wanting to leave even though it is time to leave,
you know, not wanting to leave your loved ones, thinking
that you're that they are not going to be okay
if you happen to leave. And that's something that a
lot of people hold on to, like they'll never survive
(40:01):
without me. So I got a hold on and I
can just about guarantee you that that's the circumstances that
went on with our previous dog, Scout. You know, he
weighed thirty two pounds and he got injected enough for
a dog that weighed one hundred and fifty pounds before
he finally left, And I'm pretty sure that he was
(40:24):
hanging on his side of the equation looking at his
mom because they just were nose to nose, looking at
each other's eyes. And Scout wasn't willing to leave until
they really gave him a dose to where he didn't
have a choice but to leave. But he did not
want to leave my wife.
Speaker 1 (40:44):
Well, now you mentioned regrets, and how do you help
patients come to term with those regrets or the unfinished
business they may.
Speaker 6 (40:51):
Be having again, help them to see that they made
the best decisions that they could at all times, and
that the outcomes are not always in our control. I
help them nurture, nurture compassion for themselves and support them
to know that God does not make mistakes.
Speaker 7 (41:07):
Nor should you believe that you did either, And.
Speaker 6 (41:10):
It's just important for all of us to get to
that understanding that. You know, we develop such a physical
and emotional attachment to our lives, and you know, obviously
there are lives that end abruptly and end before we
believe that it's time, while they died so young, or
(41:32):
what have you, or under these negative, terrible circumstances. And
I continually make peace with myself that when something's happening
that I never intended that there's going to be a
silver lining or even a gold lining or a platinum
lining associated with it, because I always go back to
(41:53):
my faith and I know that God doesn't make mistakes,
and so if it's happening, even beyond my understanding of
why it's happening in the moment, I know that it's
happening because that's God's plan, and I will reflect on
it until it makes sense enough to me.
Speaker 1 (42:11):
Now, can you share an example of where you've used
alternative care to help somebody during this phase. Well.
Speaker 6 (42:19):
Of the cancer people that I've helped all have been
every one of them have benefited by the insights and
the understandings they receive by having a consultation with me
and inviting me to help them with their concerns. Anyone
who consults with me at the end of their life
has always come to a place of peace by speaking
with me and sharing perspectives on death and dying. And
(42:41):
I'm eternally grateful to each and every one of them
that I've had the opportunity to share that with and
they felt highly enough about me in order to ask
for my input on that and to have those kinds
of conversations. And it's very intimate, it's very person and
it's very specific to the individual.
Speaker 7 (43:04):
And I try.
Speaker 6 (43:06):
To foster a space of healing and acceptance and non
judgment in any and everything that I do in my
office in an effort to help the person. If they're
coming to me with a concern, there's no judgment on
my end that they have the concern. There's just like,
(43:27):
what can I do to give them clarity in terms
of why they're experiencing what they're experiencing, and what they
need to do to make peace with it. And I
find that when you make peace with something that it
no longer has control over you.
Speaker 1 (43:42):
Yeah, I mean, one of the things that I was
reading about is that one of the main regrets that
people sort of expressed in those last moments is that
they somehow are not true to themselves. And when you
get to the end of life, I mean, how importance
it is. Authenticity huge peace.
Speaker 6 (44:02):
Being authentic with yourself about yourself is probably the most
honest thing that you could ever possibly do, and hopefully
long before your final act, but certainly as a final act,
I think that would help a person transition from a
(44:23):
place of peace. And so my perspective is is if
you can live a life of peace by always offering
your authentic self and embracing whatever it is that you
get back, and the more you do it.
Speaker 7 (44:35):
The better things are going to come to you.
Speaker 1 (44:38):
You know.
Speaker 6 (44:39):
I have a philosophy about the law of attraction is absolute,
and so whatever you're putting out you get back. But
if you've put out a whole bunch of negative things
before you start putting out positive things, those negative things
are going to come reinforce your need to continue to
be positive in the face of those negative things, and
then that helps to usher in the positive things that
(45:01):
you put out at a later date. But you're going
to have to deal with everything that you put out
into the world. And God bless the fact that we
have a time delay, because if our thoughts manifest it instantaneous,
then we'd create some pretty interesting outcomes.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
Yeah, I mean one of the another one of those
regrets that people get is that they've overworked their whole lives,
and you know that they've neglected some of the other
things that might have been important, and they only realize
that in that last moment. So how do people reframe
or relieve that stress.
Speaker 6 (45:35):
Well, hopefully see the circumstances for what they are and
to make adjustments at the time and not at the
very end.
Speaker 7 (45:41):
And we're all in.
Speaker 6 (45:43):
The process of working on that. I work a lot
of hours, but I love what I do and that
serves a very valuable purpose. And my wife has her
own business and she works a lot of hours, and
sometimes our schedules don't line up. And that's okay because
I need time to recover from give all day long.
And if she's got a late client and I get
(46:03):
home before she gets home, well good, that's my personal
time to get grounded and.
Speaker 7 (46:07):
Release and.
Speaker 6 (46:11):
Basically shake off the stresses of my day so that
when she comes home, I can be present for her
and listen to what stresses went on in her day
and offer her guidance and offer her counseling and be
there for her in that regard. And it works both
ways vice versa, because there were days where I'm working
later than she does, and we just try to take
(46:33):
care of each other and if there's things that I
can do to make her life more convenient, then I
go out of my way to do that, because that's
what a good spouse and that's what a good partner does.
Speaker 1 (46:43):
Yeah, I mean we were talking in the last week
and then we were talking the months before about the
lung health last week about large and testing, about letting
go and this whole process of being able to deal
with your feelings and not suppress them, but to let
them out as a way to begin to keep the peace.
And so how do those suppressed emotions affect a person's
(47:09):
health of that during that transition.
Speaker 6 (47:10):
Well, suppressed emotions are the reason for disease to begin with,
So not being transparent and authentic about your feelings, especially
at the end of life, will make the transition harder.
Based on what I've seen in over the last forty
years of helping.
Speaker 1 (47:25):
People, And we were tired earlier. We were talking about friends,
and another regret that people seem to have towards the
end of life is that they didn't do enough to
keep in touch with their friends. What health benefits can
you have on keeping those friendships alive while you're alive?
Speaker 6 (47:41):
Well, the flow of love and support and camaraderie is
the purpose of having friendships and keeping those friendships strong.
And you know, I have certain friends that I spend
time with at around certain topics, and there are other
friends that I spend with time around other topics. And
(48:01):
sometimes those two topics don't cross paths. And you know,
I know enough and am aware enough to know who
might get along and who might not get along. And
there's a lot of different pockets of friends that I
have that will never meet the other pockets of friends
that I have just.
Speaker 7 (48:18):
Because they're there.
Speaker 6 (48:20):
I deal with those friends and they're completely different dynamics.
Speaker 1 (48:23):
Yeah, I can see how that could be. I mean
another thing, and we were talking about this earlier. You've
been talking about it extensively, about the idea of happiness,
peace and happiness, and how do you help patients choose
to cultivate happiness even when they may be facing death.
Speaker 6 (48:40):
Well, help them to see the good that they did
and the legacy that they've created. And we all have
that to appreciate about our lives, and it's important to
reflect upon your life and to see the goodness of
what you've created, and even if you're going through a
difficult situation. I always do a mathematical exercise with people,
(49:01):
and what I will do is I will multiply the
number of years that they've existed times three hundred and
sixty five, and so that's the number of days that
they've lived. And then I'll multiply that number by twenty
four that's the number of hours that they've lived. And
then I'll multiply that number by sixty and that's the
number of minutes that they lived. And then I'll multiply
(49:21):
it again by sixty because that's the number of seconds
that they live. And when they can see the number
of seconds that they've lived in their lifetime, and it's
a guesstimate because obviously more seconds are accumulating, and maybe
it's not the day of their birth, so maybe they're
I don't know, sixty plus four months or what have you.
But once you get to see the number of seconds
(49:43):
that a person has lived and it's up over in
the billions, Okay, it gives at least from my perspective,
it gives you the understanding of how long you've lived
and how much you've been through and no matter what
God has thrown at you. By being able to see
the number and comprehend the example that I'm giving, you
(50:04):
obviously are alive and you understand what we're talking about,
and then that's a moment of reflection and gratitude for
look at how long I've survived and everything that I've
gotten through in the process, and that's something to be
grateful for.
Speaker 1 (50:19):
Yeah, for sure. I Mean another thing that would seem
that might be at the top of the list of
things that can make this end of lifetime more meaningful
is to understand what they did to live a meaningful life.
Speaker 6 (50:35):
Yeah, and for each person that's unique to them and
the choices that they've made and the experiences that they've had,
and the wonderful thing about life is the fact that
we all make different choices, and we've all had different
experiences and at various times our path cross And you know,
some people are in your life for a season, and
(50:56):
some people are in your life for a reason, and
it's a question of you know, if they make it
through the first season, then they're actually in your life
for a reason. And you know that reason can come
to an end at any time. And it's just it's
about gratitude and it's about being grateful about what it
is that your life is about and who's in your life.
And because again I go back to the same thing,
(51:17):
God doesn't make mistakes. If somebody's in your life, it's
a reason.
Speaker 1 (51:22):
Yeah, And I mean the idea about being able to
be loving, to make loving choices for yourself and for others.
The thing that you're talking about is you're here to
help other people. Yeah.
Speaker 6 (51:34):
The purpose of being a human being is to help
other human beings. And if you can do it in
a loving fashion, with compassion and with understanding and with grace,
then you're living a quality life.
Speaker 1 (51:45):
Yeah. And you know what about to close out our show,
and I know that you know, there are a lot
of different interesting things that you talked about today, and
you do help people not only at the times when
their life is flushed and full and in the in
the throes of the main years of living, but also
(52:06):
when people are near the end of life and when
they have those times where they're confronting perhaps a terminal illness.
And there may be people who are listening to our
show who may have a family member doing that or
maybe facing it themselves, that would be interested in finding
out what that perspective would be in their situation. What
are the best ways to reach you to get that information?
Speaker 6 (52:26):
They should call me directly on my cell phone at
area code eight four five five six one two two
two five again eight four five five six one two
two two five. You can text that phone, but I'm
a little tardy in getting back to text responses just
because my brain doesn't choose to work that way. You
(52:49):
can email me directly at doc Rick d oc riic
k at spineboy dot com, Docrick at spineboy dot com.
You can certainly stop into the office at one thirty
eight Canal Street in Pooler Park, that is in Poolar, Georgia.
We're in sweet four zero four of building four hundred.
Be happy to meet you, happy to shake your hand,
(53:11):
happy to have a conversation, happy to understand what you're
dealing with and share some insights on what it means
and what you can do about overcoming it. But yeah,
I would love the opportunity to meet with you and
try to understand what's going on in your life and
how I can help you assist you in making that
situation better. But this show is called When your Health
(53:35):
Matters because it's not up to me when your health matters.
It's actually up to you when your health matters. So
if you decide that your health matters and you want
to improve your current health situation or maintain the vital
health that you already have, I'm happy to assist in
that process. So I want to thank you for tuning
in this week. I want to thank Mark for helping
(53:55):
put this show together and asking the questions, and I
would ask all the listeners to back in next week,
same health time, same health station. This is doctor Richard
on tune from Advanced Alternative Medicine Center saying I'll look
forward to supporting you when your health mannered.
Speaker 2 (54:14):
See my position he said, you're definitely ill. Then to
the nurse I've seen worse of the doctor just gave
me a pill. Take one of those three times today.
Don't ever stop on till you're nearly dead or always
better keep out of the reach of children. I'm thinking
that might be some side effects, you mean the probably
will well limits of.
Speaker 3 (54:33):
Fact, you can't come back, and I can know one
another pill on top of that, on top of that,
on top of that, on top of that, on top
of that, on top of that, and then he showed
me his bill.
Speaker 7 (54:44):
I put another pill
Be my physician.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
He said, you're definitely ill than to the nurse. I've
seen worse than the doctor.
Speaker 1 (00:09):
Just gave me a pill.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Take one of those three times today. You don't never
stop on till you're really denner awful. Better keep out
of the region children. The thing is that some side effects,
you mean, the probably will well. Limits of fact, you
can't come. I'll give you one out of the film.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
On top of that, on top of that, on top
of that, on top of that, on top of that,
on top of that, and then he showed me his bill.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
I've popped another pill.
Speaker 4 (00:36):
Welcome to When Your Health Matters. Your host is doctor
Richard Huntoon of Advanced Alternative Medicine Center located right here
in Pool of Georgia. Doctor Hantoon has been practicing alternative health,
utilizing chiropractic and many other health techniques for the past
twenty seven years. To support you when your health matters.
It's his intention to offer practical advice every week for
(00:57):
you to consider and to apply in your own life
to make your life and the lives of your family
and friends healthier and happier. When you have questions, you'll
get your answers from doctor Rick himself or another expert
on the show. Being empowered to make positive health choices
before problem arises is the best way to approach health,
and doctor Rick promises to have information for you every
(01:17):
week that will allow you to become proactive and empowered
to take control of your health and your life.
Speaker 5 (01:23):
You are listening to the Alternative Healthcare Network.
Speaker 6 (01:27):
Welcome to this week's show, When Your Health Matters, the
show designed to empower you to better health through knowledge
and education. And I'm your host, doctor Richard Untun from
Advanced Alternative Medicine Center, and here's my partner for the show,
your health advocate, Mark Saved.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
Greg. It's really a pleasure to be able to sit
down here and have, I think in a very important
chat with you today that I think is relevant to
just about everybody that might be listening to our show today,
and that is the topic of death. And it's a
topic that has become really off limits. And I don't
even quite understand why death is a topic that we
(02:03):
avoid so rigorously.
Speaker 7 (02:06):
Is it off limits?
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Mark, Well, it seems to be. In polite society, it's
not something that people regularly talk about, and yet everybody
needs to deal with it at some level. Right.
Speaker 6 (02:16):
I speak to people all the time about the next
step and the eternity of the soul and the end
of the physical vehicle that we call the body, and
I help people lower their fear levels around the topic
of death and that we don't need to be afraid
of it. It's just the natural stage. And what the
natural next step is in a person's quote, life is
(02:36):
the end of that particular lifetime. And you know, and
if you approach end of life with a positive outlook
and an anticipation of what comes next, then it doesn't
have to be something that is off limits or creates
(02:57):
fear or any of those things. And I just think
it's important for people to understand that it is a
natural part of life and it comes at the end
of what we call life. And you know, like you said,
everybody is going to have to confront it at some point,
(03:19):
and we want you to confront it with the openness
and a healthy outlook towards it and without regret.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Yeah, I mean, it is inevitable. So why I avoid
the topic at all?
Speaker 6 (03:31):
Exactly? I personally embrace it. I know it's not my time,
it won't be for a number of years ninety more hopefully,
and like not falling off the tree, it's there's the
beginning of a new life and the end of the
attachment to the mother tree, and so they get to
go off on whatever the next adventure is. And we
(03:53):
know about the finite, we know about our physical life,
and you know, the trepidation around well, what comes next
than the lack of understanding of what comes next. I
can understand that would create trepidation. But I wouldn't ask
you to worry about death. I would ask you to
concentrate more on living life and death will come soon enough,
(04:16):
and it's not something that you have to worry about
because it's inevitable.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
It's inevitable. Is also one of the most, maybe the
most personal experience you might have.
Speaker 6 (04:26):
I guess you could see it that way. And every
moment of every day is and should be deeply personable,
and after all, it is your life, and so you
should experience it and take it personally.
Speaker 1 (04:39):
So what is the value in looking into this subject
of death?
Speaker 6 (04:45):
Just simply to be prepared physically, mentally, emotionally, and to
help get your affairs in order for the time that
when it finally does arrive and not leaving burdens for
the people that survive you, your family members or loved
ones or whatever.
Speaker 7 (05:01):
You know, you want.
Speaker 6 (05:02):
To tidy everything up so that it's the least inconvenience whatsoever.
If you know that the time is coming, et cetera,
take the time to give your stuff away to the
people that you wanted to have while you're alive, so
that they can thank you for you giving them that,
(05:22):
and just empty things out and hold on to what
you believe is to be absolutely necessary.
Speaker 7 (05:29):
Until you do take your last breath.
Speaker 6 (05:31):
But I mean, you know, if if you're not driving
anymore and you still have a car, well, why don't
you give the car to somebody that can use it
versus having it sit in your garage and take up space,
et cetera because you're not even using it anymore.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
Now, should the fact that we all die be a
reason for us to appreciate life more.
Speaker 6 (05:50):
That's an excellent perspective and one that we could all
benefit from considering, but not everybody does all the time.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
It also seems that for people, staying alive is the
most important thing, or really, is there more to consider
than that?
Speaker 6 (06:05):
Well, staying alive to fulfill the purpose of why you
are here and complete the mission, so to speak, is
most important thing. Are you being a good human being?
Are you helping other humans with your efforts?
Speaker 7 (06:18):
You know, the purpose of.
Speaker 6 (06:19):
Being a human being is to help other human beings,
and the number one on that list of human beings
that you need to help that would be yourself.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
And it seems like that. You know that mainstream medicine
is viewing depth kind of as the enemy, and it's
doing preserving life at all costs. But sometimes the way
that they're preserving somebody to be alive, whether they're in
a vegetative state or something on machines, that seems almost
more cruel than it would be to let somebody deal
(06:51):
with the inevitable in their own time.
Speaker 6 (06:53):
And that's one hundred percent correct. But appreciate that mainstream
medicine is here to help people remain in their box
for as long as they can help. If you die,
they no longer serve their purpose as a practitioner and
as an association.
Speaker 7 (07:08):
And so.
Speaker 6 (07:10):
I guess what's important. And you may ask these questions
a little bit later in the show, but I guess
it's important to be abundantly clear in terms of what
your wishes are for what you want to do with
your life, and if you get to a place. I mean,
I have had conversations with my wife. If something happens
to me and I'm in a quote vegetative state, my
(07:33):
body is still functioning, but my brain is gone, please
pull the plug. I'm sorry that you would have to
make that decision, So let me make that decision for you.
Speaker 7 (07:45):
Just pull the damn plug.
Speaker 6 (07:46):
I don't want to sit there and you know, put
a financial burden on you, because the people that are
quote keeping me alive are just counting their revenue that
is going to be coming in because I'm still alive.
Speaker 7 (07:59):
No favorite, pull the plug.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
Yeah, it's a tough decision, and I do think there
are legal mechanisms for people to make those decisions that
at the point when you are able to make a
decision or not after an event such as could be
a tragic event in your life.
Speaker 6 (08:15):
Well yeah, I mean there are ethical considerations. I've always
made my care one hundred percent about the other person.
I'm there for the individuals seeking care. It is for
them that I serve, and.
Speaker 7 (08:30):
They need that.
Speaker 6 (08:33):
They need to understand that their life is one hundred
percent about them and their choices about what they choose
to do is within their own life. They can either
choose to get well or they continue to suffer with
their health condition.
Speaker 7 (08:45):
But it's their choice.
Speaker 6 (08:47):
I'm here to support whatever choice it is that they make,
and that's it, trying to help improve their health. And
it would be no different if I was. You know,
I have a patient friend who is called a death Duela,
and she's literally there all the way up to the end,
supporting the person to get through whatever it is that
(09:10):
they need to get through. And you know, she's been
holding the hand of somebody while they transition out of
the body. And it's a miraculous experience to listen to
her describe it and what it is that she experiences
when that occurs. And I would just ask all the
listeners to do it consciously in terms of with intention
(09:36):
that this is how I would choose my life to end.
And you know, in some way, shape or form, set
your intentions so strong that you actually begin to plan
for it to be that way. Accidents happen, and consequences
of those accidents happen. But I think it's important for
(09:59):
all of us human beings to when we are of
sound mind and body, that we make understandings and to
make our wishes documented and well understood in terms of
what it is that you would like to occur when
it gets to the end of your life.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
So how do you go about helping somebody who maybe
has received a terminal diagnosis and is facing the inevitable
on a timeline that they didn't plan on.
Speaker 6 (10:29):
Support them, listen to them, talk with them about their life,
and help them to see the value in their diagnosis.
As God does not make mistakes, co creating your life
experience as a gift to the Creator is important for
all of us. And I would just say to love
them where they are and to have compassion for them,
(10:51):
and to just be a loving support to what it
is that they're experiencing. Because nobody wants to die alone.
So take the time to be there for the person,
hold the space for them, and let them feel a
sense of value, but also give them the understanding that
(11:13):
it's okay if it's time for them to go. I
had to do that with my cat from I was
sitting on a beach in the Caribbean when my cat
it was time to tell.
Speaker 7 (11:26):
The vet, yeah, it's.
Speaker 6 (11:29):
Time for her to go, and you can do whatever
you need to do, but please do it in a
way that she's if you make it so that she's
not suffering. And I felt terrible because the last thing
I said to my cat before I went on this
particular vacation was I would love for you to be
here when I get home. And I understand if.
Speaker 7 (11:52):
You have to go, that you can go, and I will.
Speaker 6 (11:57):
Be sorry that I will have missed you when you go.
Oh but there are a lot of times where you know,
somebody's got a terminal diagnosis and they're laying in bed
and their whole family gathers around and this, that and
the other thing, and they're just like, Okay, we're going
to go get some to eat and we'll come back
when we're done.
Speaker 7 (12:13):
And they leave the room. And then two minutes later
the person dies.
Speaker 6 (12:17):
Why because they said they're goodbyes. And you know, you can,
you can drag it out for an eternity, But when
you've said everything that needs to be said, and you've
communicated your your feelings and the connection that you have
with them, and there's really nothing more that needs to
be said, it's it's okay. My personal belief system is
(12:39):
we're going to see everybody again anyway.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
Are there are there special modalities that you have that
you use when you're dealing with somebody that's in that state.
Speaker 6 (12:50):
Well, I use all the tools I have available to
support on an individual to live their best life possible,
regardless of where they are in their condition that they have,
and to embrace more life even if they are dying.
And it's it's it's important.
Speaker 1 (13:05):
You know.
Speaker 6 (13:06):
I've had lots of patients that have died under my
care and it's not fun and it's saddening and it's disheartening,
and and you know, I think about what I could
have done differently, But I also know that guess what
each person's journey is one hundred percent controlled by them. Yes,
(13:29):
different people come in and out of your lives, and
you can have different people, you know, that are partnering
with you and try to support you and try to,
you know, to keep things moving in the right direction.
And every single one of the patients that I've had
that have ultimately died while they were a patient in
my office due to the circumstances of whatever their situation was,
(13:55):
you know, the family members associated with them being a
patient in my office have all had nothing but wonderful
things and a huge gratitude for the love and care
that I showed their loved one that's no longer here,
and that always makes me feel good. But at the
end of the day, I still feel bad that, you know,
(14:17):
the person's life came to an end.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
So how do you tell you, Taylor, your approach to
caring for them and a patient's individual needs and preferences.
Speaker 7 (14:27):
I ask them specifically.
Speaker 6 (14:30):
I asked their body specifically what it needs, and I
support it based on what the body is asking for,
and I solve the imbalance that they present with and
even by giving them the best that they you know,
I just want them to be at peace with whatever
(14:50):
it is that they're dealing with. The patient that most
acutely comes to mind was a patient friend of mine.
His name was Joe, and he came to me as
a referral from his oncologist with advanced stage four pancreatic cancer.
And I helped turn that bus around for.
Speaker 1 (15:11):
You know.
Speaker 6 (15:12):
I helped him gain a whole bunch of weight after
he had lost over one hundred pounds. I got him
from being confined to a wheelchair and needing physically helped
to be put into the chair to where he was
walking without a walker, without a cane, without all of it,
and he had turned to himself around completely, and then
(15:34):
they felt he was strong enough to undergo a surgical procedure,
and unfortunately the surgical procedure is what ultimately cost him
his life. But when I went to his funeral, I
had five hundred strangers coming up to me and thanking
me for the time that.
Speaker 7 (15:50):
I gave Joe.
Speaker 6 (15:52):
I gave them with Joe before Joe's passing, and everybody
was very grateful for the work that I had done,
and so much gratitude that it for me was uncomfortable
accepting all this gratitude from people for just simply doing
my job.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
Now, do you ever collaborate with something like you mentioned
the death doula? But what about what the hospice or
palliative care directly?
Speaker 7 (16:23):
Not really.
Speaker 6 (16:23):
I have a ninety four year old patient who had
a stroke during COVID and I was prohibited from helping
her because the facility did not want me.
Speaker 7 (16:31):
Helping her get well.
Speaker 6 (16:33):
She now is at home with a home health aid
who takes care of her and helps to get her
more active. And when the time comes that she decides
that she's done, I'm sure hospice will come in, or
she may just choose to pass away without all the hooplah.
That's probably more like what she will do. Knowing I mean,
(16:54):
I've known her for thirty years, and so I would
imagine that that's ultimately what will happen with her. But
you know, everybody has to make their own way out, and.
Speaker 7 (17:09):
I collaborate with anybody.
Speaker 6 (17:11):
Who happens to be involved in the care and welfare
of my patient, whether it's a family member, whether it's
a health aid, whether it's a nurse, whether it's another doctor,
whatever the case happens to be, I'm part of their
support team.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
And so is there a difference between what hospice is
and what palliative care is.
Speaker 6 (17:31):
Palliative care is for the end of the procedure and
recovering to participate in life. Hospice care is for end
of life and supporting the person and transition gracefully and
hopefully peacefully. So palliative care is about recovery and hospice
(17:52):
care is about making the person comfortable.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
Well, this is a really a very fascinating and important
conversation we're having today doctrit. We need to take a
short commercial break to hear from our sponsor, the Alternative
Healthcare Network dot com. But when we get back, I
want to go further with this conversation about end of
life and get into some of the end of life
regrets that a lot of people suffer from.
Speaker 6 (18:13):
Absolutely, but please listen to this commercial from our general sponsor.
You're listening to the Alternative Healthcare Network dot com.
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Speaker 6 (18:24):
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(18:48):
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Speaker 5 (18:51):
You are listening to the Alternative Healthcare Network.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
When someone goes into palliat into Hossa's care, what kind
of support do they get from them?
Speaker 6 (19:02):
A hospice care is supportive care with the primary goal
of comfort and quality of life. For patients with a
terminal illness and a life expectancy of six months or
less as certified by a physician.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
Can somebody leave hospice if their health improves.
Speaker 6 (19:20):
I imagine so it doesn't normally happen as being placed
on hospices for those who are coming to the end
of their life.
Speaker 7 (19:30):
But I suppose anything's possible now.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
In terms of what you do with people, What kind
of ongoing support do you offer as someone's illness progresses? Well.
Speaker 6 (19:40):
I do everything I can to assist a person to
maintain their health and life until it isn't possible. I
had a wonderful patient who passed away. At one point,
he was discharged from the hospital because there was nothing
more that they could offer. I went to his house
and he was simply lying in the bed, not engaging
(20:03):
with anyone, and I did my treatment for him for
what was required, and within fifteen minutes or so, he
was sitting up and complaining about what was on the
television and that he was hungry. I was happy he
was responding and knew he wouldn't be with us much longer.
I told him that I would be back in about
(20:24):
six days if he was still living. By then, and
unfortunately he died the following afternoon, but he did it
in his body and in his much better place than
when I had walked into his house. So he died
gracefully and without suffering, and that in itself was a blessing.
And he came to visit me in a dream three
(20:45):
days later, and he was in a much younger state.
He was driving a car that was appropriate for the
time of his life when he was that age, and
he invited me to get in the car because he
was going to take me to go fishing with him,
because when he was in my care he just kept asking,
(21:05):
you know, when am I going to be able to
go fishing again? And I'm like, well, you've got to
understand what we're up against, and I'd like to get
you there, and I'm glad that you're you're inspired to
want to get there, but we've got work to do.
And so it was fascinating to have him come visit
me in a dream driving a car that I had
never seen. And when I did go to his funeral,
(21:29):
there was a picture of that car that he showed
up with in my dream, and that in itself was.
Speaker 7 (21:35):
It's just it was.
Speaker 6 (21:37):
It was fascinating the experience that I had, but it
just told me that that, you know, our connection was
genuine and uh, you know, just the way that that
God helps people transition through circumstances, both on that side
of the veil and and on this side of the veil.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
As a caregiver and working with people who are in
these various conditions, what do you do to support somebody
or support somebody as a caregiver who is dealing with
somebody at the end of life, Because people do burn
out sometimes in this kind of occupation.
Speaker 6 (22:13):
They do, and so what I would encourage them is
to have a life outside of work and live your
life as fully as possible when not working and as
well as when you are working.
Speaker 7 (22:24):
Being an example for the people to emulate.
Speaker 6 (22:26):
And there are challenges in what I do with helping
the people that I help, and there are certainly days
that are better than other days, but at the end
of the day, I just have gratitude for the opportunity
to help facilitate a better outcome for the people that
I get to deal with. And so yeah, it's important
(22:49):
to just have the right attitude and always have the
ability to recycle and come back fresh, and whether that
requires you to take a vacation, if that requires you
to have a regular routine where you have the ability
to go exercise your stress out, if that means going
(23:10):
for counseling yourself and having somebody that can help create
you know, balance and harmony within you by having somebody
to talk to about it and takes an objective perspective
about what you're dealing with. You know, it's all of
it's about caring for self, especially if you helped care
(23:31):
for others.
Speaker 1 (23:33):
Now, let's talk about when you have to deal with families,
because I'm sure you deal with families that are going
through these things, and you talk about home business that
you've done. What are healthy ways for families and the
family members to talk about the death when they're all together.
Speaker 6 (23:50):
Simply create the space and hold the energy is supporting
each to express what they're feeling about their loved ones
life coming to an end and celebrate what they mean
to you personally and what you've gotten from the relationship.
And if there's any anger associated with at the end
(24:10):
of a person's life, it may be important to express
that anger, maybe not at the person whose life is
coming to an end, but just to express how you
felt about the circumstances or the dynamic of the relationship
that didn't end the way that you would have liked
it to end. And you know, it's just as important
(24:32):
for you to be able to express how you feel
in order for you to turn the page and move
on with your life as it is for the person
whose life is coming to an end.
Speaker 1 (24:42):
What about with children. Is there a difference in how
you would deal with a child that is contending with
losing a family member.
Speaker 6 (24:49):
Well, for me, my perspective has always been is simply
to be honest about it and support them to deal
with the reality and the circumstances and let them know
you will see your loved one again at some point.
And you know, you watch TV programs or see movies
and this, that and the other thing, and you don't
(25:12):
you're not transparent with the child because you don't think
the child can handle it. You don't know what the
child can handle. And I don't know that it's appropriate
for you to shield them so much. I think it
would be important for you to have a conversation with
them about the fact that this particular person's life came
(25:33):
to an end and what that means instead of you know,
I remember from the scene in Forrest Gump, and I
realized that the application of that is not exactly what
we're talking about. But you know, I remember the doctor
that came over to evaluate Forrest, and he was basically
going to have an illicit affair with Missus Gump to
(25:56):
get the approval so that Forrest could go to public schooling.
And you know, the character asks Sally Field's character, you know,
is there a mister Missus Gump? And she kind of
stalls and kind of looks at him and says, he's
on vacation.
Speaker 7 (26:13):
And it's just like.
Speaker 6 (26:14):
I've seen a lot of people say that your dad's
on a special mission and he's on vacation, or you know,
when Charlie Kirk passed, they were talking about, well, how
do you tell your kids that your dad died this,
that and the other thing, and it's just like, well,
he's continuing his mission by going and serving with Jesus,
and that's where dad always wanted to be kind of thing.
(26:35):
And so it's just, you know, I don't think you
need to sugarcoat it. I think that you need to
just be honest, because when you start being dishonest with
your kids, and then your kids learn the truth, then
they're going to be like, well, that wasn't the story
that I was told. And then there's trauma again around
a situation that should have been healed when it happened.
Speaker 1 (27:00):
Thing true for friends or supporting somebody who's terminally ill,
I mean, they don't have that family connection, but they
may be needing to help support somebody through that transition. Right.
Speaker 6 (27:10):
You don't want to be intrusive. You ask what can
be done. People generally bring food and simply hold space,
and it is the best thing to do to be
supportive and to have an empathetic ear if needed.
Speaker 7 (27:23):
But take the time to understand.
Speaker 6 (27:27):
And you can qualify by saying, you know, listen, I
know this is tough time, and I know that there's
probably a lot of it that you want to go
through by yourself. And what can I do to support that?
Do you want me to leave you alone? Do you
want me to hold space? Do you want me to
get your food? Do you want me to just chick
in on you every.
Speaker 7 (27:44):
Once in a while? What would you like?
Speaker 6 (27:47):
And they may tell you that they have no idea
what they want because they're too caved in by the situation,
and so that person I would just you know, probably
spend more time in their presence than not in their presence.
But when a person knows that they just need their space,
hopefully they'll have the courage to say, listen, I just
need a little bit of space. And you know, I'm
(28:08):
not telling you that I don't care about you or
that I don't want your help. I just there's an
aspect of this that I need to do for myself.
Speaker 8 (28:15):
M Now, when making decisions and of life type decisions,
how important a factor should the quality of life be
in making those decisions.
Speaker 6 (28:26):
I think it's the only factor to truly consider. Quality
is so more important than quantity, and we need to
understand that, and we need to embrace that. You know,
they'll they'll do end of life decisions that sustain a
person and keep them alive longer than maybe the person
would want to be alive. And you know, that's why
(28:47):
I think it's really abundantly clear that you put together
what your wishes are, and I would ask people to
be a little bit.
Speaker 7 (28:57):
More absolute and.
Speaker 6 (28:59):
What it is that they want by sitting in front
of a video camera. Yeah, everybody has a phone with
a video camera in it. Good videotape yourself telling your
loved ones what your last wishes are for what happens
after you pass, and then send that to an attorney,
(29:20):
or send that to your family members. Send it to
more than one person, so that you know at the
end of the day they have an understanding of what
it is that you want. I told my parents when
they were having a conversation with me if I would
be okay if my youngest brother was made the executor
of their estate, had anything happened, And I was like, no,
(29:42):
that's totally fine, I said, But at the end of
the day, don't just put it in writing.
Speaker 7 (29:47):
I think you should go home and make a.
Speaker 6 (29:48):
Video of what you want, because you can't misinterpret what
somebody's words are when you watch the words come out
of their mouth. But you can misinterpret what's been written
on paper if it isn't written in a clear way,
and God knows, attorneys can interpret things to be different
from what was the true meaning behind what was said.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
Yep, that can happen. As a healer, what's the role
to help somebody through the emotional journey of living and dying?
Speaker 6 (30:20):
As a healer, It's my job is to meet the
person where they are. It's important to just support the
person where they're at with what you have and what
you can offer to them. You know, I believe it
(30:41):
is the role of a good healer to support the
people as much as you possibly can, which is why
I have the trainings and techniques that help me to
do just that. So I try to be the best
healer that I can possibly be because I understand and
that the people that I serve, it's not about me
(31:03):
at all, It's one hundred percent about them.
Speaker 1 (31:05):
So how do you help your patients with their end
of life decisions? I mean we're talking about that. You
seem to have a good perspective on what people should consider.
Speaker 6 (31:16):
Yeah, I just try to be with them and listen
to what they want and to refrain from making any
of it about me and and what my wants is
and needs are, and and it's it's it's again. It's
it's about holding space, and it's about being selfless in
their final hour of need and their final minutes of
(31:39):
need and their at their end of life need. I
want them to leave their life feeling that they were
supported in their life because there's so many people that that.
I mean, we talked at the beginning. The title of
the show is End of Life Decisions and Regrets. There
(32:00):
are so many regrets that people have at the end
of life, and the last thing that I want to
do is communicate anything that would give them another regret.
So I try to say what I need to say
to people when they're in my presence, so that if
God forbid something happens, then I don't see them again.
Speaker 7 (32:23):
We ended the last communication that we had.
Speaker 6 (32:28):
Very clear and concise in terms of what our relationship is,
and hopefully it's always done, you know, with a sense
of love.
Speaker 1 (32:38):
Yeah, I mean, we were talking about things like that
do not resuscitate order or that somebody might choose, or
the explicit orders that either on a videotape you might want,
or the written orders or you know, last wills in
case somebody can't communicate during those last moments, and deciding
who's going to be making those decisions. But another thing
(33:00):
about potential end of life would be somebody that's decided
to end their life deliberately, something like assistant suicide. What
are your perspectives on that kind of choice?
Speaker 6 (33:14):
My perspective is is that the person wants to be
assisted in ending their life on their terms.
Speaker 7 (33:22):
Honor it.
Speaker 6 (33:25):
Who am I to say, how you want to end
your life. It's not my life, it's yours. This is
what you want to do. Okay, I may have you
write something out that said that, please don't hold me
responsible because you asked me to.
Speaker 7 (33:42):
Help you to end your life.
Speaker 6 (33:44):
And I chose to honor that, you know, just to
cover my butt because when the authorities come to find out, well,
what was the circumstances of you dying, and I say, well,
he took his life, and they're like, well, why didn't
you stop him? Well, it's very simple. Letter here says
that he wanted to end his life and that I
was here as a witness to him ending his life,
(34:05):
and he asked me for my help, So I helped them.
That's what else could I do as a loving fellow
human being is to assist the person. The purpose of
being a human being is to help other human beings.
And if that's the request that you would have for me, yeah,
it would be sad, but I would also feel honored
(34:27):
that you felt enough of me to ask me to
help you end your life.
Speaker 7 (34:34):
So I would honor it.
Speaker 1 (34:37):
Well. I mean, I know that there are particular legal
requirements depending on where you are the states, and there
are actually protocols that are actually established for people to
do that. They have to have a diagnosis, like a
hospice diagnosis of under six months to live, and then
they actually help them find a mechanical ways to actually
(35:01):
go about it. Right, that wouldn't be something that you
would do. That would be something that the patient would
have to do themselves.
Speaker 6 (35:08):
Yeah, the patient and the family members would have to
do themselves. But if they are a patient and they
don't have any other family members and they're asking for
my help, I will consult with the people that I
know that deal with end of life's situations and I
will ask them, you know, what do you recommend? What
(35:31):
is your experience with what is the best way to
go about And again, I'm going to honor the request
of the person who's asking me to help them make
the conscious choice to end their own life. And I'm
going to have them do it with dignity, and I'm
going to have them do it with love and compassion,
(35:52):
and I'm going to help them feel supported because sometimes
people go through life and one of the burdens that
they carry is the fact that they never felt supported.
So the least I can do is support them at
their end of life's decision.
Speaker 1 (36:06):
Yeah yeah, well again, this is a very important conversation
we're having today, Doc Gric. We do need to take
a short commercial break to hear from our general sponsor,
the Alternative Healthcare Network dot com. When we get back,
I want to talk to you about some of the
things that also played people at those last latter times
in their lives.
Speaker 6 (36:25):
Absolutely, but listen to this commercial from our general sponsor.
You're listening to the Alternative Healthcare Network dot com.
Speaker 5 (36:32):
You are listening to the Alternative Healthcare Network.
Speaker 6 (36:36):
If you're currently suffering from any health concern and you're
not getting the results you're looking for, please feel free
to call me directly at area code eight four five
five six one two two two five again eight four
five five six one two two two five, or you
can email me directly at Doc Gric at spine boy
dot that's Doc Riick at spine boy dot com, and
(36:58):
I look forward to serving your health care needs naturally.
Speaker 5 (37:03):
You are listening to the Alternative health Care.
Speaker 1 (37:05):
Network dealing with this whole end of life question, how
do you address the spiritual or existential concerns that someone
has at the end of life.
Speaker 6 (37:14):
Well, it's pretty simple. I support the person to know
they are going to the afterlife and it will be magnificent.
Help them make peace with the life that they are
leaving and to go knowing they did the best they
could where they were with what they had at.
Speaker 7 (37:29):
The time, and we all do.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
I don't know.
Speaker 6 (37:32):
Anybody that purposely does a bad life for themselves. Everybody
is making the best they can where they are with
what they have. And it doesn't necessarily mean that everybody's
life is the same, because obviously everybody's life isn't the same.
But I've had experiences where people that have next to
(37:55):
nothing seem to have the one thing that I personally
am on a journey to find, and that's a sense
of peace. And you know, there are people in this
world that have next to nothing that have found peace,
and I don't want to say that I'm envious of them,
but I I am trying to take the lead and
(38:20):
the experience that they have demonstrated in my witnessing their
level of peace, and that's the most important thing for
me at this stage of my life is just to
get a place, get to a place of just being
at peace.
Speaker 1 (38:36):
Mm hm, Well that sort of leads me to my
next question, which is, you know, how does your attitude
affect the possibility of a peaceful transition.
Speaker 6 (38:44):
I would expect that a person gets to choose their
way of leaving, and attitude is their choice, and hopefully
it's a peaceful attitude when it does finally happen, I
think that we all need to make peace with our
particular circumstances in or for us to leave our body.
Speaker 7 (39:02):
And until we make peace, it doesn't happen.
Speaker 6 (39:04):
Now, it could show up for three seconds just before
you take your last breath, But I think in order
for you to take your last breath and let go
of the physical vehicle that we occupy in our body,
I think we have to get to a place of peace.
Speaker 1 (39:19):
Well, isn't that kind of the ultimate letting go?
Speaker 6 (39:23):
Yes, it is, and that's the whole point. I would
think that we would have to get to that level
of peace in order for us to let go of
the bodies that we were all born into.
Speaker 1 (39:35):
Now, what can make the transition at this point more difficult?
Speaker 6 (39:40):
I would think the word would be regrets and not
wanting to leave even though it is time to leave,
you know, not wanting to leave your loved ones, thinking
that you're that they are not going to be okay
if you happen to leave. And that's something that a
lot of people hold on to, like they'll never survive
(40:01):
without me. So I got a hold on and I
can just about guarantee you that that's the circumstances that
went on with our previous dog, Scout. You know, he
weighed thirty two pounds and he got injected enough for
a dog that weighed one hundred and fifty pounds before
he finally left, And I'm pretty sure that he was
(40:24):
hanging on his side of the equation looking at his
mom because they just were nose to nose, looking at
each other's eyes. And Scout wasn't willing to leave until
they really gave him a dose to where he didn't
have a choice but to leave. But he did not
want to leave my wife.
Speaker 1 (40:44):
Well, now you mentioned regrets, and how do you help
patients come to term with those regrets or the unfinished
business they may.
Speaker 6 (40:51):
Be having again, help them to see that they made
the best decisions that they could at all times, and
that the outcomes are not always in our control. I
help them nurture, nurture compassion for themselves and support them
to know that God does not make mistakes.
Speaker 7 (41:07):
Nor should you believe that you did either, And.
Speaker 6 (41:10):
It's just important for all of us to get to
that understanding that. You know, we develop such a physical
and emotional attachment to our lives, and you know, obviously
there are lives that end abruptly and end before we
believe that it's time, while they died so young, or
(41:32):
what have you, or under these negative, terrible circumstances. And
I continually make peace with myself that when something's happening
that I never intended that there's going to be a
silver lining or even a gold lining or a platinum
lining associated with it, because I always go back to
(41:53):
my faith and I know that God doesn't make mistakes,
and so if it's happening, even beyond my understanding of
why it's happening in the moment, I know that it's
happening because that's God's plan, and I will reflect on
it until it makes sense enough to me.
Speaker 1 (42:11):
Now, can you share an example of where you've used
alternative care to help somebody during this phase. Well.
Speaker 6 (42:19):
Of the cancer people that I've helped all have been
every one of them have benefited by the insights and
the understandings they receive by having a consultation with me
and inviting me to help them with their concerns. Anyone
who consults with me at the end of their life
has always come to a place of peace by speaking
with me and sharing perspectives on death and dying. And
(42:41):
I'm eternally grateful to each and every one of them
that I've had the opportunity to share that with and
they felt highly enough about me in order to ask
for my input on that and to have those kinds
of conversations. And it's very intimate, it's very person and
it's very specific to the individual.
Speaker 7 (43:04):
And I try.
Speaker 6 (43:06):
To foster a space of healing and acceptance and non
judgment in any and everything that I do in my
office in an effort to help the person. If they're
coming to me with a concern, there's no judgment on
my end that they have the concern. There's just like,
(43:27):
what can I do to give them clarity in terms
of why they're experiencing what they're experiencing, and what they
need to do to make peace with it. And I
find that when you make peace with something that it
no longer has control over you.
Speaker 1 (43:42):
Yeah, I mean, one of the things that I was
reading about is that one of the main regrets that
people sort of expressed in those last moments is that
they somehow are not true to themselves. And when you
get to the end of life, I mean, how importance
it is. Authenticity huge peace.
Speaker 6 (44:02):
Being authentic with yourself about yourself is probably the most
honest thing that you could ever possibly do, and hopefully
long before your final act, but certainly as a final act,
I think that would help a person transition from a
(44:23):
place of peace. And so my perspective is is if
you can live a life of peace by always offering
your authentic self and embracing whatever it is that you
get back, and the more you do it.
Speaker 7 (44:35):
The better things are going to come to you.
Speaker 1 (44:38):
You know.
Speaker 6 (44:39):
I have a philosophy about the law of attraction is absolute,
and so whatever you're putting out you get back. But
if you've put out a whole bunch of negative things
before you start putting out positive things, those negative things
are going to come reinforce your need to continue to
be positive in the face of those negative things, and
then that helps to usher in the positive things that
(45:01):
you put out at a later date. But you're going
to have to deal with everything that you put out
into the world. And God bless the fact that we
have a time delay, because if our thoughts manifest it instantaneous,
then we'd create some pretty interesting outcomes.
Speaker 1 (45:18):
Yeah, I mean one of the another one of those
regrets that people get is that they've overworked their whole lives,
and you know that they've neglected some of the other
things that might have been important, and they only realize
that in that last moment. So how do people reframe
or relieve that stress.
Speaker 6 (45:35):
Well, hopefully see the circumstances for what they are and
to make adjustments at the time and not at the
very end.
Speaker 7 (45:41):
And we're all in.
Speaker 6 (45:43):
The process of working on that. I work a lot
of hours, but I love what I do and that
serves a very valuable purpose. And my wife has her
own business and she works a lot of hours, and
sometimes our schedules don't line up. And that's okay because
I need time to recover from give all day long.
And if she's got a late client and I get
(46:03):
home before she gets home, well good, that's my personal
time to get grounded and.
Speaker 7 (46:07):
Release and.
Speaker 6 (46:11):
Basically shake off the stresses of my day so that
when she comes home, I can be present for her
and listen to what stresses went on in her day
and offer her guidance and offer her counseling and be
there for her in that regard. And it works both
ways vice versa, because there were days where I'm working
later than she does, and we just try to take
(46:33):
care of each other and if there's things that I
can do to make her life more convenient, then I
go out of my way to do that, because that's
what a good spouse and that's what a good partner does.
Speaker 1 (46:43):
Yeah, I mean we were talking in the last week
and then we were talking the months before about the
lung health last week about large and testing, about letting
go and this whole process of being able to deal
with your feelings and not suppress them, but to let
them out as a way to begin to keep the peace.
And so how do those suppressed emotions affect a person's
(47:09):
health of that during that transition.
Speaker 6 (47:10):
Well, suppressed emotions are the reason for disease to begin with,
So not being transparent and authentic about your feelings, especially
at the end of life, will make the transition harder.
Based on what I've seen in over the last forty
years of helping.
Speaker 1 (47:25):
People, And we were tired earlier. We were talking about friends,
and another regret that people seem to have towards the
end of life is that they didn't do enough to
keep in touch with their friends. What health benefits can
you have on keeping those friendships alive while you're alive?
Speaker 6 (47:41):
Well, the flow of love and support and camaraderie is
the purpose of having friendships and keeping those friendships strong.
And you know, I have certain friends that I spend
time with at around certain topics, and there are other
friends that I spend with time around other topics. And
(48:01):
sometimes those two topics don't cross paths. And you know,
I know enough and am aware enough to know who
might get along and who might not get along. And
there's a lot of different pockets of friends that I
have that will never meet the other pockets of friends
that I have just.
Speaker 7 (48:18):
Because they're there.
Speaker 6 (48:20):
I deal with those friends and they're completely different dynamics.
Speaker 1 (48:23):
Yeah, I can see how that could be. I mean
another thing, and we were talking about this earlier. You've
been talking about it extensively, about the idea of happiness,
peace and happiness, and how do you help patients choose
to cultivate happiness even when they may be facing death.
Speaker 6 (48:40):
Well, help them to see the good that they did
and the legacy that they've created. And we all have
that to appreciate about our lives, and it's important to
reflect upon your life and to see the goodness of
what you've created, and even if you're going through a
difficult situation. I always do a mathematical exercise with people,
(49:01):
and what I will do is I will multiply the
number of years that they've existed times three hundred and
sixty five, and so that's the number of days that
they've lived. And then I'll multiply that number by twenty
four that's the number of hours that they've lived. And
then I'll multiply that number by sixty and that's the
number of minutes that they lived. And then I'll multiply
(49:21):
it again by sixty because that's the number of seconds
that they live. And when they can see the number
of seconds that they've lived in their lifetime, and it's
a guesstimate because obviously more seconds are accumulating, and maybe
it's not the day of their birth, so maybe they're
I don't know, sixty plus four months or what have you.
But once you get to see the number of seconds
(49:43):
that a person has lived and it's up over in
the billions, Okay, it gives at least from my perspective,
it gives you the understanding of how long you've lived
and how much you've been through and no matter what
God has thrown at you. By being able to see
the number and comprehend the example that I'm giving, you
(50:04):
obviously are alive and you understand what we're talking about,
and then that's a moment of reflection and gratitude for
look at how long I've survived and everything that I've
gotten through in the process, and that's something to be
grateful for.
Speaker 1 (50:19):
Yeah, for sure. I Mean another thing that would seem
that might be at the top of the list of
things that can make this end of lifetime more meaningful
is to understand what they did to live a meaningful life.
Speaker 6 (50:35):
Yeah, and for each person that's unique to them and
the choices that they've made and the experiences that they've had,
and the wonderful thing about life is the fact that
we all make different choices, and we've all had different
experiences and at various times our path cross And you know,
some people are in your life for a season, and
(50:56):
some people are in your life for a reason, and
it's a question of you know, if they make it
through the first season, then they're actually in your life
for a reason. And you know that reason can come
to an end at any time. And it's just it's
about gratitude and it's about being grateful about what it
is that your life is about and who's in your life.
And because again I go back to the same thing,
(51:17):
God doesn't make mistakes. If somebody's in your life, it's
a reason.
Speaker 1 (51:22):
Yeah, And I mean the idea about being able to
be loving, to make loving choices for yourself and for others.
The thing that you're talking about is you're here to
help other people. Yeah.
Speaker 6 (51:34):
The purpose of being a human being is to help
other human beings. And if you can do it in
a loving fashion, with compassion and with understanding and with grace,
then you're living a quality life.
Speaker 1 (51:45):
Yeah. And you know what about to close out our show,
and I know that you know, there are a lot
of different interesting things that you talked about today, and
you do help people not only at the times when
their life is flushed and full and in the in
the throes of the main years of living, but also
(52:06):
when people are near the end of life and when
they have those times where they're confronting perhaps a terminal illness.
And there may be people who are listening to our
show who may have a family member doing that or
maybe facing it themselves, that would be interested in finding
out what that perspective would be in their situation. What
are the best ways to reach you to get that information?
Speaker 6 (52:26):
They should call me directly on my cell phone at
area code eight four five five six one two two
two five again eight four five five six one two
two two five. You can text that phone, but I'm
a little tardy in getting back to text responses just
because my brain doesn't choose to work that way. You
(52:49):
can email me directly at doc Rick d oc riic
k at spineboy dot com, Docrick at spineboy dot com.
You can certainly stop into the office at one thirty
eight Canal Street in Pooler Park, that is in Poolar, Georgia.
We're in sweet four zero four of building four hundred.
Be happy to meet you, happy to shake your hand,
(53:11):
happy to have a conversation, happy to understand what you're
dealing with and share some insights on what it means
and what you can do about overcoming it. But yeah,
I would love the opportunity to meet with you and
try to understand what's going on in your life and
how I can help you assist you in making that
situation better. But this show is called When your Health
(53:35):
Matters because it's not up to me when your health matters.
It's actually up to you when your health matters. So
if you decide that your health matters and you want
to improve your current health situation or maintain the vital
health that you already have, I'm happy to assist in
that process. So I want to thank you for tuning
in this week. I want to thank Mark for helping
(53:55):
put this show together and asking the questions, and I
would ask all the listeners to back in next week,
same health time, same health station. This is doctor Richard
on tune from Advanced Alternative Medicine Center saying I'll look
forward to supporting you when your health mannered.
Speaker 2 (54:14):
See my position he said, you're definitely ill. Then to
the nurse I've seen worse of the doctor just gave
me a pill. Take one of those three times today.
Don't ever stop on till you're nearly dead or always
better keep out of the reach of children. I'm thinking
that might be some side effects, you mean the probably
will well limits of.
Speaker 3 (54:33):
Fact, you can't come back, and I can know one
another pill on top of that, on top of that,
on top of that, on top of that, on top
of that, on top of that, and then he showed
me his bill.
Speaker 7 (54:44):
I put another pill
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