Presents Tiffany Haddish

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
It is women we love, andour guest today is author, actress,
and singer Tiffany. We're celebrating andencouraging the vital role of women in American
history. All right, let's dothis. Luca's hear you guys, Tiffany
had it? Do you travel withit on garage? Usually? Are you

(00:21):
a solo flyer? I'm a soloflyer. I came here by myself when
these people was just here. Idon't even know them. They they say
right with me, but I said, Okay, congrats on the top three,
number one movie, you got yourbook, you got your song.
Yes, let's go to number oneand everything. Yes, please, let's
do number one and everything. Wegot to dominate. Yeah. The title

(00:43):
of the song woman Up. Yes. So Diane Warren wrote this song yes
after we sat down. So basically, Diane Warren slid my DMS back in
twenty seventeen. I didn't know tosee it because I was busy looking at
men and my DM and and Ihad ran it to her at a party
and we were talking. I waslike, I would love to work with
you. I would love to createsome me. She was like, I

(01:04):
want to work with you too.So then Uh. Some time had went
by and I was telling my team, guys, I want to work with
Dan Warren and she wants to workwith me, and they're like, yeah,
sure, and I'm like, no, she really wants to work with
me, Guys, I'm telling you. And so then I was like,
get get her, get her,let's do this, and we got together.
It's in the studio. The firstday. We were just talking about
the type of songs that I wantto make. What's the intention? And

(01:26):
so I was telling her, likewhat I go through and how I,
you know, force myself to getup every day and do no matter what
the world is saying, I knowwhat I need to be doing and getting
on top of what I need tobe doing. And I'm woman up,
you know, man out here,manning up. I'm woman up. Put
on your big girl patty drawers,put your pad on and get out here
and do what you gotta do.So then I come back to the studio

(01:51):
like a week later. She hasthree songs for me. I love all
three. Re record all three andthis is the first one of a little
little trilogy. You get three together, so we get more. Tiffany hattish
More visits in the radio. Yeah, So why this one first? Like
how did you select your single?Like you're how you're going to do it?
Well, I selected this one firstbecause I think it's most important,

(02:15):
and I think it's what we alllike as women. We all go through
like there's days we don't want toget out of bed, and I'm sure
men do it too, they don'twant to get out of bed some days
too. But there's more people dependingon us than you, And I don't
care what you men say. There'sa lot of people depending on us,
especially little people that will say thatwe ruin their lives when they grow up.
So you can't you know your childwhat I read this book on like

(02:43):
mental health, development and stuff,and they say, your child will be
as happy as you are. Right, your child will be as happy as
you are. So true. Andhow you carry yourself as a brief they
will pick up on that and theywill start to emulate that. Now,
before my mom's accident, I wouldhave to say she was generally, for
the most part, pretty person.I picked up on those happy moments and

(03:05):
trying to stick to that. That'swhy I wrote my book I Curse You
with Joy, because it's it's somuch unhappiness and so much stress and hardships
going on that you just want tobe a miserable curmudgeon like I'm not.
And it's like, you can't belike that. That's not that's not becoming.
Because yeah, when you be likethat, that's what you get back.

(03:28):
And you're like, why is allthe world coming against me? It's
really you coming against you. Youhave to be strong, and I think
it's so important that we show like, Okay, you can be You can
have your moments of like I don'tfeel like it, but you have to
pull out of that and you haveto move forward to your great you're helping
people. You're helping so many people. Yes, it's called entertainment, your

(03:52):
platform to also do good. Yeah, well my job on this planet.
I figured out what my job wasearly, and that is to bring joy.
And how however I can do that, I'm gonna do it. So
whatever mediums I can use to doso, I'm gonna do it. So.
Yeah, we got social media cool, but music, man, music
really changes moods and it really canlike get you out of a bad space.

(04:12):
I've experienced it many times with manydifferent songs, and so this one
is is now my anthem. It'sbeen my anthem for months now, y'all
just now get me. But someof y'all like, how she how's she
able to do this? She's she'ssober, she's not drinking, she's not
having sex with strangers. No,woman, I'm woman. And how many
strangers do you do? You knowhow many strangers you've had sex with?

(04:35):
Yeah? And they weren't really strangers, like okay, yeah, I mean
like maybe two or three. Idon't know their last names. I know
what I know what name I Davedid that day did? When you say
when you meet people like that,like do you save them in your phone
as like, uh, you knowa nickname Tony, Tony, uh small

(04:56):
feet or whatever? Like I don't. I don't put Tony small feet.
I might put, but I mightput like their career. Yeah, this
person, you know, editor,this person whatever, This person works at
Blockbuster. There is a dude namedBlockbuster in my fund. His name is
works at Blockbuster. He hasn't workedthere in years, but that's where I

(05:23):
met him. That's where his nameis. He doesn't even think he actually
worked there, but that's where Imet him at. It was to say
it was a clearance. What wouldyou say, Tiffany, is your lowest
low in your highest high if youjust had to think, it could even
just be recent, doesn't have tobe all. My lowest low would be
homelessness. And even then you wouldthink I was on my highest high okay,

(05:47):
because that's how I carry myself,like I wanted to know everything is
fine, Everything's gonna be okay.If I keep my nails done and my
hair done, I'm gonna be allright. But in my highest high,
I feel like I keep having higherhighs every day, every day against a
little higher. Uh. Especially,hearing the song is like watching you sing
it. It feels like one ofyour highest highs that I've ever seen.

(06:11):
Really you on social media because youjust seem very free. Well I am
free. I am uh huh yeah, I mean I do. Got a
court day coming up in a fewmonths. God only that the one was
resolved. I blew a point ohthree this one in Georgia. Georgia give
you a hard time. Boys.You got five milli grands of marijuana in

(06:33):
your blood. It's a problem.It is a problem. They don't care
if you own a dispensary in Georgia. Okay, you took a nap in
the wrong community. Man, wedidn't even see you doing it. We
didn't even see you driving. Butwe are gonna get you for that five
Milligrand I feel like you laughing,you laughing, hear it because you in

(06:56):
California, right. But somebody inGeorgia's like she going to But look at
the other people. There's Justin Bieber, Georgia, Rich Witherspoon, Georgia.
Okay, there's a pattern here.They're just trying to make some money.
They're trying to make some money.And they didn't give us the Green Book.
See, we need the Green Book. Even Reese Witherspoon, she might

(07:19):
got a little too much brown inus. You thought you was bopping but
over I mean Theylla, yeah,Elen and I went to see you guys,
to see Joe, and you openedfor Joe at the forum, and
you did this whole thing about howBeverly Hills jail is like you didn't want

(07:40):
to leave them. Let me tellyou something, let me take something.
Ifever I commit a crime on purpose, it will be done in Beverly because
they are funding those police. Okay, they're funding the police there because they
stationed. I've been in jail afew times in life. I grew up
in Foster Cares. I've been insome jail, Okay, okay, and
I'm gonna tell you right now,the best jail is the Beverly Hills Jail,

(08:05):
in the Beverly Hills Police station.It is the best jail. First
of all, in that cell,there's a call button. In no jail,
sir, you ever want the policeto be like office that this is
somebody dead, officer, but notin Beverly Hills. You push that car
button, yes, may I helpyou? Miss? This actually works and

(08:31):
they have the best MAXI pass atthat jail. I'm sorry to best.
Uh, my cycle has started.I don't know, but anybody, any
of a few other females out hereknow where your cycles start. Going to
a car and you be sleepy,You be sleepy. It is what it
is. Well, my cycle hasstarted in there. I was like,
oh, they toilet paper. Now, I don't know what they got in
they toilet paper. I don't knowwhat they use. I think it's organic
rice paper because as soon as youuse it, it disentegrates. Okay,

(08:56):
just disentegrates turns into putt just pudding, and you know it's a woman,
and the things show up and youdon't have your proper equipment. You used
swelet paper, but that couldn't usethat, couldn't use that rice pudding.
I couldn't. It didn't work.So then I called on the car button.
They gave me this max bath,biggest MAXI pat I ever sent in
my life. It went from thetop of my belly button up to my

(09:16):
bras strap. It was huge.It was huge jail pads. I'm now
a sponsored well, Tiffany. Youknow, I feel like you're always working.
Do you ever just take a moment. What do you do to relax?
You still have your garden? Youhad a garden it one time.
Yeah, I still have my garden. I still be out there gardener every

(09:39):
month. I make a big potof collar greens and I share with my
friends. But to relax, torelax, like, I just went to
Saint Martin, this time a weekend. I slept for two days. While
I was there, I was therefor four. I slept for two of
the days and then I and thenI have fun the other two. What
did you do for fun? Idanced by the pool literally danced by the

(10:03):
pool karaoke. I went to aanguilla on a boat, on the little
boat and danced on the beach andslept on the beach and then got back
on the boat, went back toSaint my teen, ate good food,
and slept some more. That's sonice. It was great. Eat sleep
dance, eat, sleep dance perfectly. Are the men there corny and horny?

(10:24):
Girl? You know what's so funny? I posted that for a reason,
I'm gonna tell you. But themen there, I don't know if
they're corny, and I'm pretty surethey horny, but they were very respectful,
very respectful. Now I have postedmen are corny and horny out here
because since since Bad Boys has comeout, Yes, okay, I've only

(10:48):
been getting text messages from lots andlots of men about how good I was
in the movie. But only threefemales have told me that I was good
in the movie, which else methat these men are horny and corny because
he's a guy that I thought wasjust my friends, but apparently I know

(11:11):
they want more than that, wantto be more than friends, and that
corny is hell? How they goingabout very corny? How you going about
it. God, if I wasWill Smith, I would have did what
you asked you that I would havedid that. Oh no, it's like
that same kind of thing. Yeah, okay, God, but is there
a pickup line that's not corny?Though? Like for real? Like how

(11:33):
no one could just throw a lineat you everything. There's no way that
you would fall for any pickup line. Ever, No, I wouldn't fall
for the I mean I would listento you because you did the line right,
and then I would start asking youquestions right, and then by the
time we finished that conversation, Ishould know your credit score because it's important

(11:56):
to know that. Yeah, Idon't. I feel like there's no man
who's enough for you, you justas a woman. First of all,
are you a jealous ass bitch forsaying that? But admiration? What's my
first instinct? Like she don't wantme to have No, you don't want

(12:16):
God made somebody for me. Iwant you to have one amazing. But
maybe I just have three or fourguys. Okay, yes, maybe I
get a combo past. There's somebodyout there I don't know. Yeah,
there definitely is, Like you've gotit. I would think that there'll be
a lot of boxes to check becauseyou're powerful force. I don't know about

(12:37):
that. I don't know if it'sa lot of boxes. My list is
real simple, and I don't reallyeven like checking boxes. I just like
being like, oh, you matchedup with that one thing I prayed for?
Are you matched up with that?Oh? Cool? Okay, all
right? You responsible? I feellike credit score is super important because that's
your grown up report card. Andhow responsible he is with his money is

(12:58):
how responsible he gonna be with yourye Oh damn? Because men't care about
their money. Yeah, and theypretty good. Men are responsible with their
money and they're going to do what'sbest. And I want them to treat
my heart like they money. Don'tdon't squander it? Yeah right, and
if you don't spend it, spendingon something that's worth something, you better
you better be a good damn experience. You better be it. Better be

(13:22):
Saint Martine. Okay, that's apuzzle, right there. Didn't mostly me
sleeping and dreaming about that. Icurse you with Joey, Tiffany Hattish and
to all of us, and especiallywe love Diane Warren too, and I
mean, come on, she's justshe's the best and you had you built

(13:43):
your friendship before this came. Sothat's also nice that you've had this these
years together as friends. Yeah,so she knows you, you know her,
she wrote these for you, andand we love your voice. That's
what we want to play with youwalking in because so it really is it's
an anthem. It's so it's socatchy. Yeah, and we can start

(14:03):
yeah yeah, yeah. And II gather men will be playing this for
their women from time to time andthey're like seeing her down, like,
come on, girl, woman up, you got this. And maybe he
rubbed her feet. You know,there's a this is this is my that's
actually my fantasy. You started thefeet of the head. I love a
head, bro, No, no, I want you to start at my
feet. And can't mess up myhair. I'm a black woman, don't

(14:28):
you can? You can. Youcan massage my scalp when you wash my
hair on Tuesdays. And that's howI want a man that's gonna wash my
hair for me and make me feelpretty. You know, he don't got
to do my hair, but hecan wash it, condition it, detangle
it, you know. Put mywig on the put my wig on,
put my wig on a mannequin headand calm it out for me, you

(14:52):
know, to me, that's howthat's how he could massage my scoff.
But he washed my hair. That'swhat he can do. That's what he
can do. Be of surface.That's my love language, you know,
touch and surface. Oh my god, awesome