How to Tackle Student Loans, Build Wealth, and Still Breathe Easy

BA Fam, we’re back at the Brown Table!  This week, Mandi is joined by our faves Yanely and Naseema for a good ol' catch-up and trust, it’s been a minute. We're talking about all things mental health, money moves, and why Naseema’s plotting a mini-retirement (yes, you heard that right).  

Plus, we dive deep into the messy student loan situation (spoiler alert: the bills are coming due) and what you actually need to know before you freak out. 

We also show love to some brilliant Black authors and entrepreneurs making big waves in the mental health and financial wellness space. 

Oh, and we might get a little sidetracked talking about breathwork,  the movie that everyone is talking about Sinners, and why leaning on your community is the biggest flex right now. 

Pull up a seat, you’re gonna want in on this one. 💛

Links + Resources:

📲 Follow on Yanely Instagram -https://www.instagram.com/missbehelpful/

📲 Follow on Naseema Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/financiallyintentional/

LET’S STAY CONNECTED

Instagram: [@brownambitionpodcast](https://www.instagram.com/brownambitionpodcast )  

Website: [brownambitionpodcast.com](https://www.brownambitionpodcast.com )  

Subscribe & leave us a review—because we love hearing from our BA fam!

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
A student loan? What are we calling it beginning May fifth?
If you have been on default on your loans, like
it's going to show up on your credit report. When
you look at the populations that are going to be
most impact, it's going to be underserved, like minority students.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
But my what I'm confused about is is their Department
of Education still.

Speaker 1 (00:21):
Over this?

Speaker 3 (00:22):
Yes, it keeps saying that the partner of Education is going
to start collection starting my fifth I'm.

Speaker 2 (00:26):
Like, what the head of the doe is? The is
the wrestling lady? That's ok?

Speaker 1 (00:34):
Even hey, the a fan, Welcome to the Brown table.
We haven't had one of these in a minute. It
feels like I've been over here just interviewing people I've
been in like my you know, my podcast host back,
just getting incredible thought leaders. I do have a couple

(00:57):
of do you you know, going on iconic radio stations
and such like that, like so like that. No, but
I've been preparing very hard for Mental Health Awareness Month,
which is happening in May. And you'll know, some of
these like months like they can be a little you know,

(01:19):
lip service, corny whatever. But because I have had such
a pivotal year in my own mental health journey this
past year. So I'm kind of celebrating the year of
me saying yes to my mental health resources and like
seeing such you know, great progress. I said, let me
put together some shows where we can really like look

(01:41):
at the link between our mindset and our finances, which
is such an obvious like they're on the same path
in my mind. Right, So I got some good.

Speaker 3 (01:51):
Pay attention enough I feel like to that, like we'll
say it over and over and over again, but people
still want to skip to Okay, so how do I
get my credit?

Speaker 4 (01:56):
Right's exactly.

Speaker 1 (01:59):
Yeah. It's also the hardest thing to coach people in.
So I've got I'm going to talk to Aga Evans,
who's a financial therapist. You know that's my boom.

Speaker 2 (02:10):
So okay, good because when I name dropped somebody on
the show, you know, she's amazing, soon to be what the.

Speaker 1 (02:17):
Way, soon to be cousin.

Speaker 2 (02:21):
She marrying your kid, no having your baby, never mine?

Speaker 1 (02:34):
Okay, long time was here. We did get a little
bit of t out of her about her dating life right.

Speaker 4 (02:41):
Along the way, like we're supposed to call over her
little trail.

Speaker 1 (02:43):
Of the uncertainty is not good for my mental health. Okay,
so let me just keep moving. Asia, who is the
author of a book that I can't remember the name.
You're gonna have it right finance. Well look at there
we go that you. I mean, it's almost like we

(03:05):
did not plan that. We did not I just literally
have to sit in here. That's when I know I
pick a good one.

Speaker 4 (03:12):
She's oh good.

Speaker 1 (03:14):
I've got Asia coming on to Like I did a
poll on my on brown Ambition's ig just asking folks,
like what kinds of questions are you having? What's what's
really like keeping you up at night? So we go
and talk about that. I've also got unessima. I told
you I was going to talk to doctor j Blackstock.

Speaker 2 (03:30):
Yeah and yeah, and Ellie, I know you'd be excited
about that too.

Speaker 4 (03:34):
Yay, Yeah, give me so.

Speaker 1 (03:39):
Yeah. So those who don't know she wrote this New
York Times bestselling book a year ago called Legacy A
Black Physician Reckons with Racism and Medicare Medicine. I almost
did it. I almost remember the whole title. You the
Good So I interviewed her along with doctor Jessica M. Shepherd,
who is a menopause and obg YA expert from the

(04:01):
West post. So we're getting into that interview ended up
being more about like their mental health because they are
two such incredible advocates for us, so I wanted to
like get real with them about and they are both
like doctor Blackstock is talking about how these you know,
this huge effort to undo DEI across America. It's impacting

(04:23):
her business because she's not a practicing physician anymore. She
has it's a well, it's a consultancy firm, so she
gets paid to speak and you know, do DEI trainings
and things like that. So we get into that. It's
a really good one. I've got the author of Black
Girls Breathing.

Speaker 2 (04:41):
Jasmine Marine, so she and I So Black Girls Breathing
is all about she actually runs this incredible network of
breathwork specialists and she trains them.

Speaker 1 (04:50):
And we're going to talk about how breath work, which
has become a really crucial part of my mental health journey.
This has been the year of it takes more than therapy. Yes,
So she's gonna we do a breath work exercise.

Speaker 2 (05:03):
She talks about like how it's helping you know, like
we talk about how how do you like get to
the root of your like your mental health challenges and
how it could impact your finances. And it ain't got
nothing to do with the calculator all, you know, sometimes.

Speaker 1 (05:17):
Like your budget, so we get into that and what else.
I have so much good stuff. But those are just
a few episodes. So stay tuned b A for all
of May. We're kicking off this Friday. When you listen
to this Friday's episode, we're gonna kick off with Ba's
Month of Mental Health and joy and fun.

Speaker 4 (05:34):
I love that. That's amazing.

Speaker 1 (05:35):
We need it, yes, definitely. So what's new with y'all
and Nasima? We haven't seen you since February when you
joined the Brown Table. I know, I know, got cuter,
if that's possible.

Speaker 2 (05:46):
Oh, it's it's the headphones that are really doing it,
you know.

Speaker 1 (05:52):
Yeah, I feel like they're bringing out something.

Speaker 2 (05:56):
These are my two year olds, by the way, but
so starning stuff coming down the line. Like I was
telling you before we started recording, I am going to
try to navigate a little mini retirement, which I won't
fully pull away from work, but I definitely won't be
working as much. More like working, going from working three

(06:20):
to five days a week to maybe six or five
or six days a month and navigating that to focus
on my family and maybe world schooling my kids, and
what that looks like is you know, using the world
as your classroom. So for example, a couple of years ago,
we went to London and you know, we went to

(06:43):
the British Museum and we talked about the British Museum
and all the things in the museum and the artifacts
where they come from. But also it was very interesting
while we were there the British Museum was robbed of
a lot of the artifacts, and then we can talk
about like, well, yes, well actually they stole all that
stuff anyway, so it's true people getting this stuff back

(07:07):
and then what that meant and you know, so like
doing things like that more interact black panther, I know
what you're talking about exactly, and you know as appropriately,
no not you wear the black panther. Oh that's the
real black panther, you know, you know, but it's just
about me representing you know, anything that says Oakland on it.

(07:28):
But my dad was a panther ironically, so yeah, wait,
so remind the b a fan. So you are a
nurse by trade, hospital nurse. What's the exact title I'm
a labor and delivery nurse my trade. Yes, I deliver babies.

Speaker 1 (07:46):
You know. My when I had my baby a couple
of years ago, the nurse who saved day as me
the same day as you.

Speaker 2 (07:56):
Shouldn't you remind me every time? Uh, we have dem nights,
twin babies, so the same day as you.

Speaker 1 (08:02):
I had one of those those like minim what did
you call it, mini retirement? I had a mini retired
nurse who was incredible nurse.

Speaker 2 (08:10):
She's like, oh, that's like twice a month, and I
just happened to the per day and I was so
happy because she was the best exactly.

Speaker 1 (08:17):
And you come to work like so happy to be.

Speaker 2 (08:20):
There, like we love what we do. But the burnout
is really real. Yeah, the job stress is real. So yeah,
I just saw.

Speaker 3 (08:28):
The study that said that the highest trusted profession in
the United States is a nurse. Yeah, when you burn out,
it's you know, that's why people have so much trust
in nurses. You go above and beyond your working so hard,
crazy hours, and when you have a good nurse, it
makes the.

Speaker 4 (08:46):
Entire hospital experience so different. So it makes sense.

Speaker 2 (08:49):
But yes, that burnout, Yeah, it definitely makes her break
a hospital experience, and especially in labor and delivery, where
you never forget right when you have a baby. Yeah,
I mean you're also such so much more than that.
You have four baby girls.

Speaker 1 (09:06):
I have three. Okay, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, unmanifest which
is still incredible. Three baby girls amazing, And you've created
this brand financially intentional, and I've as a mom myself.
I just love I love seeing how you have invested

(09:28):
for their futures and got some six figure naires already already. Yeah,
so what's that going to look like? So then are
you living off the have you been investing in savings?
So you're gonna like partially live off of that, and
then whatever income you get from financially intentional exactly exactly,
and then maybe a little bit of commingling of funds,

(09:51):
like combining some funds and you know, just some.

Speaker 2 (09:58):
Very special person with with who escalated February.

Speaker 1 (10:05):
Maybe it's cousin, you know. Oh no, literally you're going
to be here. Are you engaged?

Speaker 2 (10:12):
No?

Speaker 1 (10:13):
Not yet?

Speaker 4 (10:14):
Oh say wait a minute, I'm cool.

Speaker 1 (10:18):
You're cool. Although Ellie, I know I look like a
news anchor, but my I disassembled my mic stand and
this is just how it's going to.

Speaker 4 (10:25):
Be, reporting live, making it work.

Speaker 3 (10:28):
Yeah, I'm so happy for you to hear that, because
I just feel like that is the number one reason
why high achieving women step away is burnout.

Speaker 4 (10:41):
You pour so much into the work we do.

Speaker 3 (10:44):
So like the fact that you're figuring out a way
to still do what you love, still make that impact,
still do the work, but do it in a way
that works for you, Like I'm all here for many retirements.

Speaker 4 (10:53):
I love it.

Speaker 2 (10:54):
And also to be able to spend time with my kids,
who I actually really like, I really enjoy them, and
like I'm never First of all, I never even wanted
to have no kids, So let's start there. I got three,
and I know I'll be looking at them like where
the hell these kids?

Speaker 1 (11:11):
I am?

Speaker 2 (11:11):
You know how they say you're your ancestry's wildest dream,
I am my past selves nightmare baby man, who would
be appholled We live where DJ's does the excursion of
the week, like we like the babies.

Speaker 1 (11:31):
But it's true though.

Speaker 3 (11:32):
Because the kids this is the age, like, this is
the age that makes all of they are so impressionable.

Speaker 4 (11:39):
At this age, this is the age that you.

Speaker 3 (11:41):
Enjoy most and remember most this that young age, Like
I remember my thought. My memory is always with my
mom because my dad was always working. He will only
be home one day week, and that one day that
he was home not working, of course, he was sleeping
all day because he's exhausted. So I feel like I
don't have childhood early memories of like my dad being
that playful dad that he is now as a granddad,

(12:02):
I see him as an a whelo with with my
niece and nephews, how he is with them. I'm like, oh,
you know, I never got that experience with him as
a dad because he was always working right just to
get of them table. So for you to be able
to step away for that reason, to be like no, no,
my girls are gonna remember me this way, it's like beful.
That is what all of our ancestors have wanted for us,

(12:23):
I'm sure forever because it's a beautiful thing.

Speaker 4 (12:25):
It's such a gift.

Speaker 2 (12:27):
Yeah, I'm excited about it.

Speaker 1 (12:30):
So what's the timeline for this many retirement.

Speaker 2 (12:33):
Well, I'm figuring that out, hopefully within the next couple
of months. Like I was telling you, if you guys
don't know who Jillian Geschard is, I mean Jillian John's route.

Speaker 1 (12:42):
I used to say her name.

Speaker 2 (12:43):
Jillian John's Root is author of Retire Often, which is
coming out in September. It's not a plug, but she
has a retire Often podcast and she's retired several times
and coaches people through it and so just figuring things
outgos with her. Initially it was gonna be June, which

(13:03):
is very soon, but I'll figure it out in the
next couple of weeks. I'll have to update you. I'll
know by mid May what my timeline is looking like
and what my trajectory will be.

Speaker 3 (13:17):
Oh, I love that contract about retire Often list.

Speaker 2 (13:22):
My goodness, I don't know on my radar, No on
my list. Now billion is the bomb? Like I thought
everybody knew Jillian in this community. Yeah, yeah, I'm under.
I'm under this book right now.

Speaker 1 (13:36):
I don't. I'm lucky. I remember, y'all and the fact
that we don't have a kid a book. My manuscript
is due today, y'all. I do not know why I
booked this, but I'm really happy I did because I
have Literally I have been in my basement since five
a m. Finalizing the menu.

Speaker 2 (13:54):
Have to Yeah, Oh my god, that the book that
I wrote. I don't even market it because it's so
much trauma bond, like so much PTSD. Yay, you got
another one that I'm enjoying. I definitely, I definitely have
a big, bigger one and a different one. I did

(14:15):
it a little bit unconventionally so and it was just
like my way to get exposed to it. But I
was just like ooh, I needed yeah, I mean, and
mind you, it was like an eight week timeline during
COVID girl, while being a nurse full time, while my
daughter was in kindergarten and out of school. So I

(14:37):
ve the way you say kindergarten, kindygarden, How do you
say that kindergarten exactly as you did, keep going, we
don't know kindergarten.

Speaker 1 (14:50):
And then.

Speaker 2 (14:52):
And you know, she couldn't read how to do her homework.
So I would go to work for twelve hours, come home,
and then and you know, be her teacher, and then
do it all again. And I was I was fortunately
the only one to never get COVID on my.

Speaker 1 (15:07):
Unit, and I still haven't gotten COVID that.

Speaker 4 (15:09):
I know of.

Speaker 2 (15:10):
But so I was always working because everybody was sick.
Everybody kept on calling out six so it's like, can
you come in? Can you come in? And writing his book?
So a lot of a lot of a lot of
trauma around it. Jesus deserve many retirements.

Speaker 4 (15:24):
About time you needed one a couple of years ago.

Speaker 2 (15:27):
Yes, yes, yes, And there's about the stuff happened on
top of that that like kind of broke up my family.

Speaker 1 (15:32):
But uh, you know it these five years, I mean
I think everyone's journey, that everyone's got a book. After
these five years, I feel like, oh for sure, you know, sure, Sorry,
I'm purshing mine from my body, and it has been
I needed more than eight weeks. I'll tell you that
I needed. I think I got this book deal the

(15:53):
week before the month before I gave birth to more
Gemini baby. So it's been two years and this is
the manuscript. So I have all these edits to do.
But anyway, speaking of Oakland and why you love it
and you always were up so hard, how excited are
you for your boy Ryan Cougler? Oh my god, seeding
in this way, it would have been awkward if you

(16:13):
were like, who, I don't know. No, For first of all,
Ryan Coogler is everything.

Speaker 2 (16:19):
He's just like, first of all, he's from Oakland and
he also went to USC which is my Olmer model
double time. So you know our ride for Ryan Cougler.
You know he a little bit younger. If he was
a little bit older, you know, it would be really
all talking about younger, you know, when you're in college
and you like a senior and.

Speaker 1 (16:38):
In the freshman Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.

Speaker 4 (16:42):
He's not even forty yet, y'all. He's up there at
thirty day.

Speaker 1 (16:45):
Yeah, he's almost Have y'all seen Centners? Planning to see it,
like in a couple of hours, so you haven't seen.

Speaker 4 (16:57):
It, I have not.

Speaker 1 (16:58):
Alright, no, scholers, no ready, I've been waiting for this moment.

Speaker 4 (17:05):
It is so freaking good.

Speaker 3 (17:07):
I beloved to everybody I know that you have to
go see it, like you must.

Speaker 4 (17:12):
We went last.

Speaker 3 (17:13):
Weekend on a date night, and it's well because my
boyfriend was literally like not trying to do anything. I
was like, Bay, let's go, let's go it, let's go
out listen to He's like, no, no, and I was like,
we gotta go see Sinners.

Speaker 4 (17:22):
Now. His thing is as soon as I see I
say like I want to go see.

Speaker 3 (17:25):
A movie, his immediate thing is like he's gonna go
look at rotten tomatoes.

Speaker 4 (17:29):
H that is not that person.

Speaker 3 (17:31):
That person and if so written tomatoes number is not
looking like one hundred percent, it's a no. But Sinners
is damn near one hundred percent for both. It was
percent for both for both for those critics ready and
the tomatometer like that is unheard of for a movie
to get so high in both. That's how I was
like able to convince him, and we went straight to

(17:51):
the movie theater.

Speaker 4 (17:52):
I was so excited.

Speaker 1 (17:55):
I treated myself the day after I got back from
that road trip. The two died that I'm trying to
forget it about so hard, so stop talking about it, Mandy.
I got back from this long anyway events, and yeah,
I went on a Monday by myself to an IMAX
theater near me, and apparently it's not in every theater,
so I think I'm lucky to live next to one
that has it. Oh yeah, but you know, I was

(18:17):
a little afraid, y'all. I didn't think I liked it.
I really left the I left the theater so like
I had just gone through something. I felt so raw.

Speaker 2 (18:27):
I think I was also, you're tired that it was
intense AF I don't think it's a spoiler to say
stay through the credits. At this point we all know
stay through the credits. But I wouldn't have gotten up
if you had paid me. I was so cemented to
my seat with just what did I like so much?
Like the weight and the gravity of it all. I

(18:49):
need to go see it again.

Speaker 1 (18:51):
And I texted my brother right after and I was like,
sinners And he's like, what did you think? He had
also seen the night before.

Speaker 2 (18:56):
Yeah, and I was like, I don't know that I
loved it, and it's not because like I think that
it's almost It doesn't do it justice to put it
in like the I liked or didn't like a category.

Speaker 4 (19:08):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (19:09):
I have thought about that movie every hour of every
day since I saw it, just about I've had dreams
about it. I thought about different scenes. It was art,
I mean, it definitely is. Yeah, It's definitely an incredible film,
a huge film, like a phenomenal film. Am I gonna

(19:31):
want to watch it? Like you know, it's not gonna
be my comfort movie. I'll tell you that for free
and not when I'm having a bad day. But it
was beautifully done and I.

Speaker 3 (19:43):
Just have never seen a movie that approaches the topic
in that way, like it's usually you see vampire movies'
is like oh, monsters versus victims. Ah, Like no, this
is like so complex and dynamic, like power, oppression, racism,
Jim Role, Survival of Black Americans in nineteen forty, nineteen thirty,

(20:03):
nineteen forties Mississippi, like what and.

Speaker 2 (20:06):
Vampires, music, music, musical vampiresm.

Speaker 4 (20:11):
Music, dancing. The cinematography was amazing.

Speaker 2 (20:14):
Michael Jordan's movie Michael Not One.

Speaker 4 (20:20):
But Girl I loved.

Speaker 3 (20:20):
I thought it was incredible in terms of artistic and
creative expression, the interweaving of like the message around the
music and black culture, and it being taken by not
coincidentally a white vampire.

Speaker 4 (20:35):
No white white man vampires were.

Speaker 1 (20:38):
Given to him by a by a one movie or line.

Speaker 4 (20:46):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was just it was a lot.
It was a lot of layers.

Speaker 2 (20:50):
I can't like no spoilers, I know, I was okay,
I'm really excited.

Speaker 1 (20:54):
I'm really hyped up.

Speaker 4 (20:55):
Yeah yeah, girl, I think you're going to have a time.

Speaker 1 (20:57):
You going with your booth, hag or are you going? No? No, no, no,
he doesn't live here.

Speaker 4 (21:02):
Oh well, you're gonna love it regardless. It's definitely the
type of movie where. Actually I was just talking to
my friend.

Speaker 3 (21:07):
If y'all don't follow him, definitely go ty Alan Jackson
on and stuff.

Speaker 4 (21:11):
He does children's books for.

Speaker 3 (21:13):
Financial literacy and also just black fiction children's books like
by comic books.

Speaker 4 (21:17):
Anyway, he's amazing.

Speaker 3 (21:18):
So I was talking to him and he was like,
I'm going to see it. I went by myself the
first time. The theater was empty. He sat in the
theater alone, okay, and then he's like, I'm going back
again tomorrow to see it again.

Speaker 4 (21:31):
Like I was like, dang, but I see it with people.

Speaker 1 (21:34):
I really do. Yeah, I'm scared to see it by myself.
But it's not. But it's scary, but I want to.
I want to talk about it, like I like to
get in the weeds. I wanted someone to talk about
it with immediately, and everybody in the theater was just
like me. We were all shell shocked and we all
just left. It was silent. It was like a funeral dirge.
It was weird.

Speaker 4 (21:51):
Oh my gosh, Okay, see that's not how it was.
But we left the theater.

Speaker 3 (21:55):
Now, granted this is Miami, so like, yeah, the theater
going is weird depending our neighborhood you go to.

Speaker 4 (22:00):
But it was definitely a buzzing.

Speaker 3 (22:02):
Everybody was talking chatty like when we left, Wow, so
it was no. I think it's it's different depending on
the aura, the environment, the vibe of the theater. You
see it in what's his name? Ty what Alan Jackson?

Speaker 4 (22:16):
He has a kid's book called.

Speaker 3 (22:18):
Uh, Make your Own Money, How Kids can earn and
spend it entry big. So if you've got a kid
I love, then he's great make your Own Money. And
then also he has another kid's book called Danny Dollar.

Speaker 1 (22:30):
I gotta get Rio that. The other day Rio told
me he wants to He says he wants to be
a millionaire. I was like, what have they been talking
about it?

Speaker 3 (22:38):
After Danny Dollar Danny Dollars Break.

Speaker 4 (22:40):
It's like the Lemonade Escapade.

Speaker 3 (22:42):
It's a little black boy who has a business to
sell lemonade and then there's drama, but then he gets
to meet the mayor and he's the goal is to
be found a millionaire because he wants to own a
sports team.

Speaker 1 (22:51):
I love that book. It's so good to.

Speaker 3 (22:52):
Read aloud, Like if you have a younger kid that
you read aloud to them, or if you have like
a fourth grader and third fourth grader up that they
can read it on their own.

Speaker 4 (22:59):
It's like a chat to book. But I love love
love Tie. He's great.

Speaker 1 (23:03):
Oh the book wrecks are hot. Hey, ba Fam, We're
gonna take a quick break, pay some bills, and we'll
be right back. All right, ba fam, we're back. So
news wise, I am like thinking about my buzzworthy topics,
and the one that BA fam has been dming about

(23:24):
the most has been like the student loan. Uh, what
are we calling it? Come to GMSS? Is it a mess?
So the latest I had seen was that beginning May fifth,
you're if you have been on default on your loans,
like it's going to show up on your credit report. Right.
Oh wow, the chickens have come home to roost. The

(23:47):
honeymoon is over. And also this just means there's not
a presidential election close enough for it to sway votes.
So they're finally okay with like letting it go. Listen,
Joe Biden, we appreciate you, but I know you kept
it alive. You tried, you did, I mean you did
it frisbe in five years now since the pandemic. Yeah,

(24:08):
so like what do y'all think? I mean, I feel
like the only thing you can do is go to
your student loan services website asap and figure out where
your loan stand find out where they're all at. Yeah,
with student loan stuff, it's so complex that I always
try to encourage people to work with a consultant, like

(24:31):
a student loan planner or something like that, who can
really dive in, especially if you have a whole lot
of federal student loans, who can really dive in the
back end and just like see like what your best
options are because that I feel like you can get
caught up in some mess, especially right now.

Speaker 2 (24:47):
But what I'm confused about is what is their Department
of Education? Still, like, who's Who's like over this?

Speaker 4 (25:02):
Yes, it keeps saying that the partner of Education is
going to start collection. Starting my fits, I'm like, what
which department of the ones?

Speaker 2 (25:07):
Not the one that they dismantles, Like, yeah, I can't
keep up.

Speaker 1 (25:14):
I'm over here. Yeah, I know you have to look
at the latest. And I was like, I mean I
feel like I knew what was happening on Friday, but
now it's been a few days since then, so I
feel the need to. I think, well, the student loan,
I mean, the government itself does service some loans. So
the Department of Education like website, we can post a
link in the show notes for y'all. Studentad dot gov

(25:36):
is where you would go to like find out what's
happening with your federal student loans. But sometimes, like when
I had student loans, they were serviced by another company,
So the government would contract with these big loan servicers,
so I used to have nail Net. Of course, then
there's like Sally May and not all these big ones,
so they all service federal student loan debt. And the
thing is, like, you know how sometimes when you get

(25:58):
a mortgage, they yeah they sell the debt. Yeah, yeah,
they sell the debt, so it may not be the
same servicer as you remember. It's just really really important
no matter. I know. What's confusing, and the unfortunate thing
is that it doesn't feel like there's a grown up
at the steering wheel. So we really have to like

(26:19):
take it on ourselves to go and figure out what
all we have.

Speaker 2 (26:23):
And yeah, yeah, there's some good accounts to follow that
really track it. Like I said, if you just follow
student loan planner. It's not the stans, just student loan planner.

Speaker 1 (26:34):
And then.

Speaker 2 (26:36):
Oh my god, why am I blanking on the lawyer
that's also doing student loans? Really tall life skin dude,
I'm gonna tell you a lawyer. Yeah, he's a student
loan lawyer from he's instilly. The head of the doe
is the is the wrestling lady.

Speaker 1 (26:57):
That's the thing I can't even right. So the real
fear among people like ba fam I was just looking
at the comments is like wage garnishment, which can happen
if you're severely delinquent. So that means like you're you've

(27:17):
missed two hundred and seventy days or more of your payments,
So that's months and months of missing payments, almost a
full year. So at this point, I mean, it's not
just wage garnishment. It could they can also take money
from your tax refund yep that you may be owed
and may not see next come next tax season.

Speaker 2 (27:39):
So social security benefits. We have our our older kings
and queens.

Speaker 3 (27:46):
Still paying student loans because that's the reality, that's the
world we live in.

Speaker 2 (27:50):
Yes, yes, I can say I am very happy to
have paid them off. At first, I was max. I
was like, so I had got all these forgiveness programs,
all of that stuff, And then I'm just like, well,
I mean like, if they hadn't forgiven them now, I
would have been in a whole world of hurt. But
you know, I'm very glad I have no more student

(28:13):
loans that two hundred and twenty thousand or two hundred
and fifty thousand that I actually paid off. Congratulations because
you're so clear and beautiful and you are like, yuh
name you know how to? I mean like, I don't
understand how you've lived this many lives and accomplished so much.

Speaker 4 (28:37):
That is wild, girl.

Speaker 1 (28:39):
You deserve that. Retire girl, I bet I.

Speaker 2 (28:42):
Have been moving like I don't think people understand. I'll
be like, listen, just scirl Instagram. You'll see a whole
lot of shit you been playing around?

Speaker 1 (28:52):
Nellie? What about you, miss Ivy League? Did you have that?

Speaker 3 (28:55):
I had one small student loan because I did get
a full ride. I was just that nerdy kid, so
my scholarship covered all my tuition and stuff. But I
did have a student loan for my summer study of
bar program that was.

Speaker 4 (29:05):
Not governed by the scholarship.

Speaker 3 (29:06):
So I did take out a student loan for that,
but it was a small it was like under seven K.
So when I graduated, I feel like I was like
of under student loans. But I did have a bunch
of credit card debt. That's another story. I did pay
off the student loans. I do feel like it's really scary,
Like I have a sister who was dealing with almost
one hundred thousand dollars of student loan debt, and I

(29:26):
just feel like we didn't have a lot of guidance
and she wasn't lucky like me to get the scholarship.
So it's either especially when you're a really low income kid,
it's like the low income kids and the high high
high income earners that kind of cost when it comes
to college expenses, because like your family either got it.

Speaker 4 (29:41):
They just drop a forty K check.

Speaker 3 (29:42):
And it's fine, or you get a full scholarship because
your low income and high achieving. But it's the middle income,
right that just gets screwed end up with stacks and
stacks on stacks of student loan debt, and it's just
it's so hard.

Speaker 4 (29:56):
I feel like that's the biggest frustration.

Speaker 3 (29:58):
But my sister was able to get a lot of
her student loan debt forgiven because she works in higher
edge so she was able to qualify for the federal
federal Public Service Loan Forgusness program. But if you don't
work in public service, obviously that's not an option. And
there's really not a lot of other types of forgiveness
out there, like they're not really trying to wipe debt.

Speaker 2 (30:15):
So I do that actually, actually, actually, what I have
learned is that there are hundreds of long forgiveness programs.
Public service loan forgiveness is just the biggest one. That's
why I always defers to like specialists because it's a
lot of stuff you don't know unless you follow the
legislation and all of the programs to the t, and

(30:39):
you know, with other persons with.

Speaker 3 (30:41):
Me with most tax things, that's how it isn't like
when you look at the exact policies and stuff. But
I mean, look, it's a it's a good thing that
so many people got forgiveness because there was a lot
of a corruption, There was a lot of like lack
of clarity. There was a lot of fun in just
things happening with like not being being actually informed about
interests or how it works, or being told that your

(31:03):
loan was unsubsidized or subsized when it was unsubsidized. I
mean there's a lot there were. There was also predatory stuff,
like people straight up calling my sister her to just
sign up for defermit, sign up for forbearans, don't worry
about it, just put it into four burns. Just sign
up for this. I'll help you do it right now,
not explaining what does that mean. Because the interest keeps
a crewing baby every single day. They don't pause the interest,

(31:25):
so you don't really fully understand. So I do think
that because of that it was important to do a
lot of forgiveness. But even still, like I do think
people are just straight up scared now, and I argue
in the SEMA like you got to get ahead of
it because the government can garnish up to fifteen percent
of your wages.

Speaker 4 (31:40):
They can't.

Speaker 3 (31:41):
They will come for that paycheck, but only right, but
only if you have not taken any steps to try
to set up a payment plan or set up something first.

Speaker 4 (31:50):
If you even if you if you do outreach and you.

Speaker 3 (31:53):
Set up something as small as that might be, that
alone is enough to not put you in the wage
garnishment category or in any of these other like horrible
for your credit and things like that, because you're working
with them. But the problem is so many of us,
when we have really like a death situation that's really scary,
we try to do like the Ostrich and like bury
ourselves up under the sand and just try to like
avoid their calls, don't reach out to them, try to

(32:14):
pretend it's not just going to magically go away, Like
this is one in particular where they're coming down hard
on it because it's been five years that they haven't
collected a penny of interest on these loans, and.

Speaker 4 (32:24):
So they're really trying to buck down on it.

Speaker 3 (32:27):
So we just, I just think, just get ahead of it,
and like Nasima said, if you need help, there are
certifications and designations specifically for people who are like c SLP,
which is Certified Student More Professional, not just a rando
on Instagram, like how can I help you with, you know,
student Home Professional y'alls.

Speaker 2 (32:44):
And student loan lawyers. The student loan lawyer I was
thinking about his name is Stanley Tate.

Speaker 1 (32:49):
Yeah, Stanley Tait okay mm hmm Yeh's actually helpful if
you're trying to challenge a wage garnishment, which oh yeah,
and he has he has done that.

Speaker 2 (32:59):
You know, you can't have student loans removed from your
your credit and all of that stuff, and it's with you.

Speaker 1 (33:05):
He has taken those.

Speaker 4 (33:08):
They can't.

Speaker 3 (33:08):
They also say that you can't have it written off
in a bankruptcy.

Speaker 1 (33:12):
Yes, but again, if you have a lord, I'm.

Speaker 4 (33:13):
Working with you.

Speaker 3 (33:14):
There are certain cases of undo hardship that in certain
cases your situation is so specific to you, don't just
go on you know, social watch these videos and think
it applies to you. Your situation is very specific that
one on one can be really helpful.

Speaker 1 (33:29):
Yeah, Studentaid Dot of y'all. That is the Department of
Education's website. It's just such a you know, it's just
such bullshit because they wait until the CFPP has been dismantled.
So that's like the Consumer Protection Bureau, which that protected
students in the wake of the financial crisis from eight
who were being taken advantage of left and right by

(33:49):
these servicers charge fees. You know. Also, you know our
President Orange himself and his Trump University, you know bs
that that was also like he was also sued for scamming.
Oh yeah, that private school staff. Oh yeah, that for
profit school.

Speaker 4 (34:07):
Like yeah, all kinds of the history of vier.

Speaker 1 (34:10):
Education being a scam for so many people is there.
It's a shame. So we have to Yeah, we have
to protect ourselves. And I love that y'all shared some
additional resources. But the first step is just figuring out
where your loans stand studenta dot gov and then we'll
put it. That's where you pull all of that, that's right, Yeah.

Speaker 3 (34:27):
And if you don't, if you're like, look, I really
want to work with somebody one on one and I
don't have money to hire like a certified person, there
are some places where you can get free advice for
your student loans. I know one of them is the
Institute of Student Loan Advisors, but it makes sure like
usually it's going to be nonprofit or affiliated with a
local government agency, because the reality is, I mean, if
it's not a nonprofit, like, they're gonna have to make

(34:49):
money somehow from this. So I would say look for
free advice if you really are in a situation where
you're like, I can't even pay my loans, how am
I gonna pay somebody to help me? Not pay my loans.
I don't have money, So I get that, but don't
just like quit and give up. Like there's so many
re resources out there. You just really have to do
the digging and put in the time.

Speaker 2 (35:06):
And then also I have to say, even if you
are paying for service, first of all, make sure that
it's a credible service. But the thing is is that
you're saying you can't pay your loans. The fees are minimal,
like a couple hundred dollars. But for example, if I
would have worked with them before I paid off my
student loans, it would have saved me eighty thousand dollars.

(35:28):
So I mean, like in the whole scheme of things
like look at it, oh, really just based on like
how much interest you paid, just on how I paid
it off. If I would have strategized it, if I
would have optimized my strategy, I could have saved eighty
thousand dollars over the course of the time.

Speaker 1 (35:44):
So that ain't no small change, honey.

Speaker 3 (35:47):
Oh, year's worth the salary for a lot of people
out there, the salary for a lot of other people out.

Speaker 1 (35:52):
There, exactly.

Speaker 3 (35:54):
Yeah, yeah, that's wild, But yeah, I think I think
a lot of the confusion right now is also like
the safe plan, like is it even a thing anymore?

Speaker 1 (36:02):
Like what are the options?

Speaker 4 (36:04):
That's the confusing part.

Speaker 3 (36:05):
So I do think that you can just wrap your
head around it by going on a studay dot gov.
Some of it it's not so clear, but you know,
for the most part, if your income is at a
position where it's like, okay, first of all, my salary solo,
my income is solo, Like that's the part that's really hard.
Then they have the income driven repayment plan, and I
do feel like for a lot of people that usually
is going to be.

Speaker 4 (36:24):
A first solid place to start. If you are in
a situation right now you're like, I don't even know
how I'm supposed to pay.

Speaker 3 (36:28):
Just start with the day driven repayment plan while you
start figuring out if there's a better option of a plan,
because that is directly tied to your income. If you're
in a low income environment right now, that's going to
help you at least to make sure it's limited to
a small percentage of your income, which is already.

Speaker 4 (36:41):
Low as it is.

Speaker 3 (36:42):
So you start there right and then you can kind
of start getting some clarity and looking for next steps.

Speaker 4 (36:47):
From there on.

Speaker 1 (36:48):
Yep, it's no wonder why HBCUs are having a hard
time recruiting, especially black men right now. It's a hard
case to make. I mean, there's definitely still a case
to be made for why education is crucial, can be
crucial for your professional journey and to get like you know,
to get the best access to high paying jobs. But
it's not the end all be all. I think the
jig is up, like people are realizing that, but we are,

(37:12):
Like when you look at the populations that are going
to be most impacted, like you said, the people caught
in the middle between the low income and the high
it's like it's going to be underserved, like minority students.
So it's more so if you have cousins, you know, siblings,
younger siblings who are heading into college. Just make sure.
I wish that I had.

Speaker 2 (37:31):
I got lucky that I was too cheap to pay,
Like I don't know, my mom told me not to
like take out student loans for my housing and stuff
like that, so I only graduated with like eight K
as well on Elie, But I feel like if I
had just gotten some counseling even out my own campus
y before I said yes, and let me re up
this loan semester for semester. Yeah, I think that, like

(37:55):
you said, that is so missing, But does it really
incentive the school to have somebody there to do that.

Speaker 1 (38:03):
That's the whole thing for me.

Speaker 2 (38:05):
What ended up happening was I went to USC was
private school at that time. You know, I'm old, so
twenty two years ago, well that was when I graduated,
so twenty six years ago. It was forty thousand dollars
a year, and like, they hit me with that bill

(38:27):
because we fell in that middle that you were talking about,
Yan Nelly, and my dad was like, I ain't got
iron the.

Speaker 1 (38:32):
Moss pay this.

Speaker 2 (38:33):
And so I went to the office and I said,
my daddy said, he's not paying for it, and they
was like, I said, to tell you, and they said, okay,
we'll just give you a grant. So I graduated from
six years at USC undergrad grad school with only forty
thousand dollars a debt considering because.

Speaker 4 (38:56):
School right that was nursing school or nursing school.

Speaker 1 (39:01):
Nursing school.

Speaker 2 (39:02):
Yeah, so after that at the state school, by the gotcha.

Speaker 4 (39:06):
But a lot of people take that on per year.

Speaker 1 (39:09):
Yes, exactly.

Speaker 4 (39:10):
At that total.

Speaker 3 (39:11):
But you make a good point. You make a really
good point, Mandy about HBCU struggling. Right now, my sister
fell out with my sister who is the VP of
data analytics at Howard University.

Speaker 4 (39:22):
That's right, My sister is doing the damn thing though
she's about that year mark, kiddos, you know.

Speaker 1 (39:29):
We work hard.

Speaker 3 (39:31):
But so my sister actually recently told me that a
lot of the data shows and it's not like this
is some internal thing, like it's very public data that
the challenge is financial for most students that go to Howard.
And what you see is that four years. They call
it a four year degree because most people do a
bachelor in four years, but a lot of students at
Howard take five or six years to do that four

(39:52):
year degree because the finances because personally they end up
getting like they can't so they pause and they come
back and they have to extend. So it takes much
longer because of the finances.

Speaker 4 (40:02):
And that's I think.

Speaker 3 (40:03):
Is a huge piece of this puzzle that even though
you could you could do all the wiping and forgiveness
that you want on all the student loans that exist.
But moving forward though, like what is happening to these
droves and droves of incoming students that it's not being addressed.
It's like, Okay, well, we're gonna fix this problem over here,
but we're not gonna get to the root of it
when we keep bringing new students into a system that

(40:24):
is burdening them with that in the first place.

Speaker 1 (40:28):
Hey, ba, fam, We're gonna take a quick break, pay
some bills, and we'll be right back. Welcome back, bea fam.
Let's get back to the show. And then they're under
attack by their own by their own government at the same.

Speaker 4 (40:40):
Time, at the exact same time.

Speaker 1 (40:42):
Let's not have a psychotic spiral, because it's all happening
all at once. That's the whole thing. It's all happening
all at once. How are y' all coping it is?
We're heading into mental health months? This is That's it.

Speaker 2 (40:57):
Like the only thing I'm like looking for or too,
is like being able to escape the rat race and
what that looks like for me, Like that's the only
thing holding me together right now.

Speaker 1 (41:07):
I ain't gonna lie And you're gonna take charge of
your kids education?

Speaker 5 (41:12):
Yes, yes, So when I did teach for America, they
taught us in this like super speedy like training program
they call Institute Summer Institute training.

Speaker 4 (41:23):
So you basically if you do teach for America, you
don't get the four years to study education.

Speaker 3 (41:28):
Most people just come in and do two years of teaching,
but they have to give you like a master's in
education in like four weeks over the summer and then
you're in the classroom.

Speaker 4 (41:36):
So I know, the really fast like program.

Speaker 3 (41:39):
But one of the biggest things that I got from
that training program was it's not just apply. It doesn't
just apply to teaching, But it was this idea that
as a teacher, there is so much going on because
you're in a school building that's part of a larger
school district of many different schools, that's part of a
much larger state with lots of schools, much larger national
education system.

Speaker 4 (41:58):
But you're in your classroom. And so what you can
focus on, which you.

Speaker 3 (42:01):
Should allow yourself to really put energy towards, is what's
in your locus of control. Anything that is not within
your locus of control, it is literally pointless, a waste
of your time, energy resources, mental energy, Like it is
a waste to even consider it because it's not in

(42:24):
your locus of control at.

Speaker 1 (42:25):
All, locus. I like that, you know what I.

Speaker 3 (42:30):
Talk with you about, the locus of control thing, because Nasima,
that's what you're saying.

Speaker 4 (42:33):
Like, like, what is in my logos of control?

Speaker 3 (42:35):
What I do with my time, what I do with
my income, with my savings, with my network, what I
do with my daughters in my home and for me,
it looks similar in Miami, like I don't have kids
and all that, but I've been spending a lot more
time with my friends.

Speaker 4 (42:46):
My friend groups are mostly.

Speaker 3 (42:48):
All people of color, all a lot of them are
LGBTQ I A plus like we it's a pretty diverse mix,
especially for living in Miami. In Florida, it's rough out here,
so we have to find each other. We've been doing
like brunches at each other's places, getting together to do workouts.

Speaker 4 (43:05):
I just did yoga with to with my girls the
other day, Like we have to.

Speaker 3 (43:08):
I just have to lean on my people because that
way it reminds me like even though the new cycles crazy,
even though a lot of these people around us do
have backwards thought processes and beliefs, but like we got
each other, and we all we got and we're here,
like let's lean on that because it's gonna get us
through these couple of years. Is as wild a is
it gonna get like your people are all you got,
And like, for me, I've been doubling down on that

(43:29):
and just like helping us as I can with what
I can offer them, which is like, hey, let's sit
down and help you with your finances.

Speaker 4 (43:35):
You know.

Speaker 3 (43:35):
I just had a call the other day with one
of my friends who's like, I'm doing a gig through
my consulting business with Google. They're gonna pay me six
figures to do this mentorship program with a lot of
students doing this Google coming into Google, and I don't
know what to do with the money.

Speaker 4 (43:48):
I was like, gir, I got you. We're gonna speak
and I was zom for an hour talk about all.

Speaker 3 (43:52):
Like let's just be there for each other and hold
each other down, because that's to me always the best
thing I can do.

Speaker 4 (43:58):
That is in my locus of contry.

Speaker 1 (44:00):
I love it, maloucas my area of control. Yeah, I mean,
I mean, not not my entire computer off my hodgepodge
of books that they're standing on, you know. I was.
I was talking to Tiffany recently, Yes, my Tiffany are Tiffany,
And she was like, I think we're one of us

(44:22):
was having an off day and I was like, if
it wasn't for my kids, I think they are like
a meditation in and of themselves because they forced you
to just if you do it right, just like focus
on whatever they're focused on. So that helps. Is like
actually being on the floor playing for me. But to
your point you Ellie about community. Oh, one of the
interviews that I'm really excited about I have Nicky No

(44:44):
Mickey Kendall, the author of Hood Feminism, which came out
during the pandemic. It's a great book if you guys
haven't read it. She's working on a new book that's
incredibly depressing. We're talking about it and it's like no, no,
even She's like, I don't know how to find uplifting
part at the end I thought I would come to
it's all very dystopian, but it's basically about how the
American dream is gone. Uh it was a lie, which

(45:07):
we all know. But towards the end of our conversation,
she was I was. I asked her. I was like, well,
what do you think is the answer? Like, how do
we get through this if you she's predicting civil war
and all these things. Uh. And she said it's community.
And she came up with an example of like even
in like it's going to be hyper local, Who were

(45:27):
the people in your neighborhood? How are y'all bartering and
trading skills and you know sharing resources? Who has you know,
who has something to offer other people? And what can
you share amongst each other? And by the time I
was done talking to her, I had a group chat
going with my two neighbors who like me, attempt to
garden each year.

Speaker 4 (45:47):
And have varying results at gardening day.

Speaker 1 (45:52):
I was like, no, we're gonna well, since then it's escalated,
I went and I got. I passed by this restaurant
all the time where they've they've shut down, and fortunately
it was a great restaurant. But they have all these
beautiful like these these big like cedar planting beds, like
raised garden beds in the front of their restaurant, and
they're just empty. And I happen to know someone who
had the email for the owner. Long story short, He's like,

(46:14):
I'll donate three of our these giant planter beds to you,
and this community garden project, which at that point was
a text that I started with my friends. So now
I have a community garden. And now we've chosen like
my neighbor who's across the way from me, she's gonna
put it in her yard. She gets the best light,
and then we can all access it and we're just
gonna start planting. We're each gonna like take a couple

(46:37):
of crops. Yet I've got tomatoes and some herbs, and
then my other neighbor's doing corn and eggplant. Like we're
trying to spread it so that we're not all trying
to grow, Like I'm trying to grow all these things
and I'm failing at it because I can't keep track.
And now we can like tend to the garden together,
and we've got co parents for our plant babies, so

(46:58):
like if one of us is vacation, the other one
can show up and like water them or whatever the
hell you got to do to plans. I don't know, Yeah,
pick off the big caterpillars that try to eat them.

Speaker 3 (47:08):
I love that we need that, and we need that
that model, Mandy, I feel like that model applies to
so many other contexts.

Speaker 4 (47:14):
Like I just heard.

Speaker 3 (47:15):
I was watching Instagram content from Delina Meddin. She's a
good friend of mine. She's also a celebrity makeup artist,
and she was talking about how within her space, like
beauty and makeup in that industry the hardest thing about
trying to tell people to do community and like small
businesses and like black owned women brands and Latina on
women brands, Like it's hard because of shipping. The shipping

(47:36):
and handling is like the most expensive part. Like you
might order a mescarra that costs her twenty thirty bucks,
and all of a sudden, the shipping is like seven dollars,
and all of a sudden, a third of the price
is gone to shipping, and you're like, nah, I'm gonna
just get this on ambagon Amazon. That's so it's so
hard to like leave. But her message, which I loved,
I saved her real about this because I was like

(47:57):
I got to come back to this was like we
didn't get in our group chat. All the girls we
all buying the same as Cat, We all buying this,
you know, buttery skin whatever, were all doing it, So
why don't we all get in here and go like
all right, I'm gonna place the order. What do y'all need?

Speaker 4 (48:11):
Well, I'll get it all. We split you all paid.

Speaker 3 (48:13):
We're paid out just like a dinner or a bunch
of a birthday event. And then we split the shipping
and handling so it's a couple bucks each instead of
each one of us placing a separate order. And then
we can actually use Amazon less or have the goal
aspiration within sight to eventually not use it. And I
just thought that was so powerful because, like you said, Mandy,
like you so simple, It seems so simple, right, it's just.

Speaker 1 (48:35):
It, that's other people for help.

Speaker 3 (48:37):
Yes, And we all already doing a lot of this
stuff anyway. We just got to like unsilo the way
we do so we all doing stuff in silos like
why why?

Speaker 2 (48:47):
Well, that's exactly what I was about to say, Like
then we have to kind of question, like when did
we give from this community model that we all have
used to know into like these hyper independent like structures
where it's just like you and maybe one other person
or you by yourself.

Speaker 1 (49:03):
Especially for black.

Speaker 2 (49:04):
Women, I don't know, like that's been shoved down our throat,
like independent women, you can do it yourself, you don't
need nobody. All that kind of stuff like where did
this hyperindependence come from? When we know like everything has
traditionally been rooted in that village structure, in that family
and community structure. It's almost like it's intentional. Oh, it's

(49:25):
quite lucrative for companies if we're all buying one of everything.

Speaker 3 (49:29):
Right well, and politically, yeah, when we think about what's
going on with politics right now, the world, the way
things are moving, it sounds a lot like what's in
alignment to these ideas of like self sufficient, yourself, up
for yourself, do for your own, worry about yourself, and
it's like.

Speaker 1 (49:46):
There's not enough for us all. We must all protect
our own.

Speaker 3 (49:50):
Yes, you're off it, because then it affects your mindset
and roots into thinking that like.

Speaker 1 (49:54):
We're coming for yours. It's only yours, and they're coming
to take it, and.

Speaker 3 (49:59):
I can't be thinking about nobody else. And it's like wait,
if we actually take a step back and like reflect
on the bigger picture, the only way is to do
that super hyper local, community driven stuff, because at the
end of the day, when you do find yourself completely
in a siloed doing things for yourself by yourself, that's
where the frustration sets in that's when you don't see

(50:19):
yourself making any progress.

Speaker 4 (50:20):
That's when you start to get negative and that negativity festers.

Speaker 3 (50:23):
It's like, nah, that's not that's not what brings It
is not what brings peace. That's not good for your
nervous system. Like that's not what Like that's why we
have so much anxiety.

Speaker 1 (50:34):
Honestly.

Speaker 3 (50:34):
So I just I feel like I am with you
on this, Mandy, if I want that model to like
apply to all other aspects, all these other aspects of
our life, to our finances, what the stuff we shop for,
get groceries, like all this stuff, because I'm like, one
of the biggest things I've been trying to do.

Speaker 4 (50:48):
Is reduce the plastic that I use.

Speaker 3 (50:50):
And it's so hard because every time I go to
a supermarket, everything's in plastic, little kate little plastic things.
Everything's bagged up, individual rat plastic, and I'm like, oh my.

Speaker 1 (50:58):
Gosh, it's hell about it. Europe too. I didn't realize.
I didn't realize.

Speaker 2 (51:03):
Like even when I go to the grocery store, when
I get produced, like you know, people put everything in
a little back. I don't do that, Like I just
group everything together and then I have a bad one.
But everything in Europe is like package like that. But
I don't know if you guys know, but there are
these like like fire communities. I don't know if you
guys follow, you know, the campi Fi Steven Bauer like

(51:23):
he has created like these communities in like the Florida
and Georgia areas where it's supposed to be a collective community.
So you know, there's one community lawnmower, there's a community
center that everybody goes to and shares everything and cooks
mills together, you know, co opting parenting situations, co opting education,

(51:47):
like all of these stuff. So these houses are built
in a subdivision or they bought like a block, right,
but everybody in there has this like covenant that this
is a community and this is how and we are
sharing in all of these resources. And it's very financially intentional,

(52:07):
very community minded. It's not very diverse right now.

Speaker 1 (52:14):
But but it can be.

Speaker 6 (52:19):
It can be so, but it's just because we don't
know what we don't know, right and so a lot
of this stuff has been happening in other communities for
a long long time, but unfortunately we haven't had access
to that information.

Speaker 1 (52:36):
So you know, that's why our platforms exist. I can
already hear people who are thinking, I've tried, but I
don't have that kind of neighborhood. I don't have those
kind of neighbors. What would y'all say to that, that
fear or that.

Speaker 2 (52:50):
I guess always we always, you know, we're experts at
the naysayers and the and the doubters and all that
kind of stuff. I think it comes with the territory,
But I think it's it's about exposure, right. The more
you see something normalized by people who look like you
or have shared experiences as you, the more you know
it's possible. So we just got to keep on leaning

(53:12):
into these messages and keep on sharing, like we share.

Speaker 1 (53:15):
So that people know that they can do that.

Speaker 2 (53:19):
And I always share my story to the fullest, Like
you can hear about my divorce, my bankruptcies, my foreclosures,
my failures, my domestic violence, like all that kind of stuff,
and say like if she could do and shit, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (53:38):
You know the body that you didn't promote because it
was so traumatic. See, it doesn't have all of that
stuff in there, so you.

Speaker 2 (53:45):
Know, oh wait, yeah, we're gonna we're gonna write that
book you Gotta bring Coffy reds Foot Feminism by Niki Kind.

Speaker 1 (53:52):
No, no, no, no, I'm gonna. Oh, I think you'd
like it a lot.

Speaker 3 (53:55):
Yeah, so important because it does address all like it's
a disc service to only post what you've accomplished and
not all the adversity that you had to overcome to
be to be a success.

Speaker 4 (54:07):
Story, because at the end of the day, it makes
everybody think, oh, Okay, here's a goodie, go to app
No it's not.

Speaker 3 (54:12):
It's not that, And that's the only way to actually
do it in a way that serves everybody who watches
your content to know the real deal, to know what
actually happened and the whole picture, not.

Speaker 4 (54:21):
Just the social media pretty parts, right, because that's that's important.

Speaker 3 (54:25):
But I really, honestly, I do feel like if you
live in an area that's not really like, that's not
designed like that, just go a little bit further out,
like it's for example, in Brooklyn, like where I grew up. Honestly,
I'm not gonna lie in Bushwick. It probably wouldn't have
worked necessarily unless it was a very specific group of
like families, because once I started growing up Bushwick started
changing so much and gentrification hit hard. So I would

(54:47):
see people and then like a couple months later, they
wouldn't live there anymore.

Speaker 4 (54:50):
I'd be like, wait, what's going on? All they sold?
They left? Oh there's you know this new business took over.

Speaker 3 (54:53):
The bodega is now a bakery. And it's like it
would change so fast it was hard to get a
sense of like that community. I still feel like if
you go a little bit further out, like five Boroughs.
While it's a little far to go from Brooklyn to
the Bronx or whatever, even that is enough to find
people that are serious about Like if it's a Facebook
group for like the Five Boroughs no spend, like you know,

(55:16):
no trying to like do no spend where like oh,
you know, we have this uh stroller, our babies doesn't
need it anymore instead of like you know, putting it,
throwing it outside or putting it in the garage.

Speaker 2 (55:30):
Like yeah, the buy the buy nothing groups, that's huge.

Speaker 4 (55:35):
Way.

Speaker 3 (55:36):
My brother's wife, my sister in law, she recently joined
the buy nothing group for the Five Boroughs and she's like,
you don't understand, this is amazing. Little things, little things
like a little toy that she saw on there. There
was like anybody who can come by and pick it
up is yours.

Speaker 2 (55:50):
I just got bikes, I've gotten everything, bikes, strollers, and
I've given away the same thing, like and then you
I find somebody that like pass down my kids clothes
to like that means everything versus.

Speaker 1 (56:03):
Like giving stuff to the good will, Like.

Speaker 4 (56:06):
Right, it's a girl.

Speaker 3 (56:08):
A lot of my sisters, they all of my sisters
have children except for me, every single one of them.
When they've gone through the process, they will bag up
all the clothes from their youngest and pass it down
to the next sister who just had a baby, so
that there's not this constant we have to go out
and buy a whole bunch of new stuff for this baby,
a whole bunch of It's been a lot of hand
me down stuff. And I feel like there's sometimes when

(56:30):
I'm in certain certain environments, bougier kind of groups, there's
this ick, like it gives them this ick to think like, oh, no,
I'm buying my my stuff new. I don't know, child,
that's what they want you.

Speaker 2 (56:43):
To wash your machines, Like those clothes are probably cleaning
and the clothes you're getting off the rack, honey.

Speaker 3 (56:48):
But that's also how they want us to think, because
that way, the more Amazon prevails, the more the more new,
brand new new stuff, and it's so bad for us
in so many ways.

Speaker 4 (56:58):
So I just feel like the more we.

Speaker 3 (56:59):
Can go in the opposite direction, the better it is
for us in all these aspects of our lives that
we're talking about, right, like the environment, your finances, your
mental health, your feeling of connectedness to your community.

Speaker 4 (57:10):
There's so many things. Just that small interaction.

Speaker 1 (57:12):
Right.

Speaker 3 (57:13):
My sister in law was telling me she left school
and she routed her drive back home to stop along
the way at the house of this woman and the
buy nothing group where she could pick up the little
toy for the baby. And when she stopped by, she
had a quick, just a ten minute chat with this woman.
They had a cute little conversation. She got the toy,
she was like, thank you so much, and that little thing,
just like that little interaction that normally wouldn't happen, she

(57:34):
would just go straight home, right, It just uplifted her spirit.
That day was so much better. She made a connection.
She met this woman. She stopped on a different route
on the way home, like These are the tiny little
things throughout life that cause life can just get so grueling.

Speaker 4 (57:45):
It's like day in and day out them and not
any of it. Oh and then we get so unhappy.

Speaker 3 (57:50):
And these tiny little things to change up your day
can make a big difference on how your mindset, like
how you start to feel, how you think, and it's
all up here of course, but just even just that joy, bro,
we need a little bit of that joy back in
our lives.

Speaker 1 (58:03):
Mm hmm. Amen. Well, I think that's a wonderful message
for be a fan. Like I want to hear about
your community gardens. I mean, like also your struggle gardens,
because I think the real real like me, And what
no I spoke about with Mickey was like how people
want perfection in their communities, like even you, you know,
put the asterisk with the campfire, dude, and like you

(58:25):
know it not being diverse listen, like it's going to
be imperfection everywhere while we try to figure it out.
And you know, I think conflict is gonna come with
I think, you know, interpersonal conflict, Like we're all gonna
get the more we lean into community, the more we're
gonna have to anticipate there's gonna be conflict. We're gonna
have to get through things together and learn how to.

(58:48):
And I think that that friction is what people have become.
It's not even about like the money sometimes or you know,
it's like, oh, I don't want it to deal with people.
I don't want to and like what if people are
like what if they are inconvenient to me? But I
think that's a muscle that we need to be working
like that is what community is putting yourself maybe a

(59:11):
little bit out of your way or out of you know,
doing something inconvenient for the good of the community. And
that's like a mentality anti consumerism to me that I'm
excited to like model for my kids and for myself.
And I'll keep you out posted on the garden and
we'll let you know how it goes. If you'll be
like we're fighting over the tomato hall, like who knows right?

(59:32):
If well Kanie messes up the corn, we're all gonna
like ouster, I'm getting it'll be fine.

Speaker 3 (59:39):
But they use the model too, because like I do
feel like we have the model interacting with other humans
that we don't you know, like yeah, kids nowadays is
so stuck to the iPad. It will stuck to the phones.

Speaker 1 (59:48):
Like they don't know how to interact out.

Speaker 4 (59:51):
And interact with other people. Your child will see you
doing that.

Speaker 2 (59:54):
All this is I ill myself to interact for twelve
hours in the car.

Speaker 1 (01:00:00):
I admire you. I'm gonna clap let's clap it up
for that girl. It was a tour de force. But
by the end of it, my little five year old
he was reading books by himself and continuing that, like,
it really does make all the difference. It's so goddamn hard.
But I also feel like, well, I didn't have these kids,
so it's up to me.

Speaker 3 (01:00:21):
But also you didn't have I've had when you were
five years old in the car with mom and dad.

Speaker 1 (01:00:26):
Like I used to spend a lot of time with them,
Giga pets, though they only did like three things what
I could think. They got the Pokemon game Boy. I'm
like that had like one level. But I was sad.

Speaker 3 (01:00:42):
But we got to go back to all that. Listen,
the simplicity of it having in the car, having books car.

Speaker 4 (01:00:49):
We can do it, y'all, we can can't.

Speaker 1 (01:00:51):
We can do it, but you know, for the emergency
times you keep those headphones in the ema and you
keep them ready for the car in the car all rights.
Thank y'all so much for joining me on the brown
table today. Thanks for getting me out of my book cave.
I'm about to go back in it.

Speaker 2 (01:01:09):
The clock is ticking, so I got to pick up
those children. This girl's two forty.

Speaker 1 (01:01:14):
I gotta have the rest of the manuscript done in
two point one hour or so. Oh, let's go. You
got this, you got it. I'll eat later, all right,
ba fam. Until next time, please stay tuned for all
the fun content that I'm planning for mental health May
and yeah, just thank y'all. Where can they find y'all?
Y'a Ellie and Nsima? Where are you at?

Speaker 4 (01:01:36):
I'm helpful?

Speaker 3 (01:01:38):
Am I sspe helpful? And you can get a both
mind your money book dot com?

Speaker 2 (01:01:43):
Yay, yes, and I am at financially intentional. We'lltly on Instagram,
but look up Nesima, google me, you'll find me.

Speaker 1 (01:01:53):
You have a future. I feel like and like like
voiceover work. I feel like you.

Speaker 3 (01:01:57):
That's that's good, that's so true.

Speaker 4 (01:01:59):
You have.

Speaker 1 (01:02:02):
AI now like close my eyes because it's twelve different people.

Speaker 2 (01:02:07):
You could Trindy Garden, Inky Garden all right, you go
have the good time that sinners.

Speaker 1 (01:02:12):
I want to know what happened. I want to know
how you like it? Oh, yes, for sure? All right
bye everybody, Okay va fam, Thank you so much for
listening to this week's show. I want to shout out
to our production team, Courtney, our editor, Carla, our fearless
leader for idea to launch productions. I want to shout

(01:02:34):
out my assistant Lauda Escalante and Cameron McNair for helping
me put the show together. It is not a one
person project, as much as I have tried to make
it so these past ten years. I need help, y'all,
and thank goodness I've been able to put this team
around me to support me on this journey and to
y'all be a fam. I love you so so so

(01:02:56):
so much. Please rate, review, subscribe, make sure you're sign
up to newsletter to get all the latest updates on
upcoming episodes, our tenth year anniversary celebrations to come, and
until next time, talk to you soon. Ba bye