Men Vs. Food - Gastronomy or Misogyny? - Dating Kinda Sucks

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Hi, I'm Sarah and I'm Adam Heath Avittible. This is
the DKs Podcast, a podcast about love, sex, culture and society.
This week we'll ask the question are men weird about food?

Speaker 2 (00:17):
Whether you're married or fingle borrying and on Wizmaner's back
at your place listen to us and be getting a
tenderbred mumble and plenty of young trying and trying and
happen to luck because we all know.

Speaker 3 (00:30):
Dating kind of sucks.

Speaker 1 (00:33):
Okay, so let's get back to the swing of things
and talk about what Adam loves to rant about most,
which is stupid men and they're so called ways stupid men.

Speaker 3 (00:43):
That's right, My favorite topic. Although this is the funny
thing is this is actually a topic I am very
interested to dive into with you because for once, it's
something I don't really have a concrete opinion on, and
so it'll be interesting. Yeah, yeah, I'm sure I will
form one by the end of the episode. But before
we get into the topic, we're gonna catch up on
what's going on in our lives. We're gonna apologize in

(01:03):
advance for the frequent ad breaks our provider here has
has encouraged us to try to treat this more like
a normal And I think the new podcast standard is
to have ad breaks like commercials, So like every ten
minutes or whatever, you have an ad break. So we're
gonna try that out and see how annoying it really is.
And then we're gonna talk about girl Dinner and finally

(01:24):
discuss men's connection with food, but start off with a horse.
What's going on in our lives? And Sarah, it's been
a couple of weeks since our last episode, and what
kind of trouble have you been.

Speaker 1 (01:33):
Getting into trouble? I haven't been getting into trouble. What
are you talking about?

Speaker 3 (01:38):
Is the troublemaker? Out of the two of us, you're
always the one.

Speaker 1 (01:41):
That's a bold statement right there when we talk about
what you've been up to lately. I'm wrong, but yeah,
I mean the sun is coming out in Seattle. I
have some plans now with Roy we Are. I got it.
So I got invited to this influencer VET in Vancouver,
Canada in a few weeks for the Vancouver Fashion Week,

(02:03):
And originally I wasn't going to go because I've been
in my spending freeze because I just had a three
thousand dollars car repair bill that really sucked to pay.
And so in that time, I've just been not doing
anything fun and staying home. And I got invited to
this and I was talking to ROI about I was like, yeah,
you know, I turned it down just because the extra

(02:25):
money on a hotel and everything. And he looked at
me and he was like, are you for real You're
not going to go. It's like a three hour drive away,
and you like Vancouver and it's an easy weekend trip.
Why wouldn't we go? I was like, oh. So then
I was asking around and everyone kept saying I should go.
So now I'm going. It kind of falls on the

(02:46):
weekend of our five year anniversary of when we first
started dating, so it'll be a nice We'll do the
fashion show and then we'll also, you know, go out
to a couple of nice dinners and celebrate being together
for five years, which is insane. As I said, five years,
is that crazy?

Speaker 3 (03:03):
So my first question is are you going to take
the train into Vancouver? Are going to drive?

Speaker 1 (03:07):
We're going to drive because the train is a lot
more expensive and I didn't pre plan it ahead of.

Speaker 3 (03:11):
The time, right right, Just for listeners, Sarah. If Sarah
doesn't pre plan something as part of her budget, then
it can't happen.

Speaker 1 (03:17):
So that's no, no, no, no I'm saying. I'm saying
if I would have, if I would have planned to
go up a couple weeks ago, the prices probably would
have been a lot cheaper than they are now. Now.
It's almost two hundred dollars to take the train round
trip versus me driving, right, and that's per person, so
Roy would also have to spend that money too, on
top of a hotel and then everything else. So gas

(03:40):
in my car and technically driving is faster too. Even
though I really don't want to drive, I also don't
want to pay two hundred dollars just to take a train.

Speaker 3 (03:48):
That part, it is definitely fair.

Speaker 1 (03:50):
And secondly, giving me shit are saying you and.

Speaker 3 (03:53):
Your nerdy ways, your spreadsheet ways.

Speaker 1 (03:56):
I spreadsheet ways, but they work, they work, and I
save money that way. I again, I spent three thousand
dollars to fix my fucking car, so yeah, I'm a
little tight.

Speaker 3 (04:05):
First, might as well use it this time, I know, right,
if you have the money, you might a little fuck
use it. My second question is remind us what you
did on your first date with with Roy, Well, it
was a five years since you get Yeah, I know,
and I just had just said for listeners because then
I also I remember like a little bit of it,
but I remember a lot.

Speaker 1 (04:23):
It was a so we matched on Tinder. It was
a virtual zoom date and we both had a bottle
of wine and we just drank wine and chatted for
a handful of hours. And our first couple of dates,
I want to say like three or four dates were
all virtual or like either a FaceTime or something like that,
just because we couldn't see each other. It was still

(04:45):
it was still April, so it was one of those
things will be solved by Easter, and that was not
the case. So yeah, our first date was that. And
then after that first date, I ran out of wine
and he jokingly said he would buy me more wine
since he couldn't buy me a drink on our first date.
And then he dropped off two or three bottles of
wine because he went to Whole He was already shopping
at Whole Foods. And that's how he became master of none,

(05:07):
was because he made the whole comedy thing and that
was that was it.

Speaker 3 (05:14):
I had forgotten his nickname actually entirely. So so that's
that's because he's been Roy for so long. I know.

Speaker 1 (05:22):
Yeah, So that's that's where we're at with things. And
now we've moved across the country. We've lived together for
three years and things are good.

Speaker 3 (05:31):
Crazy. So five year anniversary is going to be Vancouver
Fashion show. It's gonna be the weekend.

Speaker 1 (05:36):
Yeah, that weekend.

Speaker 3 (05:38):
It'll be fun.

Speaker 1 (05:39):
Yeah, nothing too crazy. I was just like, Babe, you
gotta I have to figure out what I'm wearing, but
you also have to think about what you're wearing for
this fashion show. So but he has he has nice clothes,
so I'm not concerned. But I just the reminder of
we're going to this fashion event.

Speaker 3 (05:55):
No one, he's not gonna wear a T shirt that
said that says like, uh, I'll fuck that pussy and
then wearing a pair of jeans.

Speaker 1 (06:03):
No, he does have this fish hook shirt though, that
he wears all the time. That's the shirt that I
don't love that he wears. But I can't. It's a finger.
It doesn't say anything. It's just a woman getting pleasured
and there's she had like someone's finger is like fish
hooking her mouth and she's kind of drooling. It's a
band T shirt and he wear it the first time

(06:26):
he met a couple of my friends in Nashville as
his first impression. I remember he got in the car
and I was like, what the fuck are you wearing?
You can't wear that shirt? So he I'm gonna suggest
that he doesn't wear that to this fashion show. I'm
not even gonna bring it up, but I'm I hope
he doesn't. He won't wear it. Watch the photo I
post online he's wearing it. But yeah, so that's that's

(06:47):
about it. And then the next thing I'm looking forward
to is Japan. So probably the next time we talk
will either be right before I leave or after I
get back.

Speaker 3 (06:55):
Okay, that's exciting. Is Roy still rocking the mullet? He is?

Speaker 1 (07:00):
Yes?

Speaker 3 (07:00):
Okay, yes, okay.

Speaker 1 (07:01):
So well, it hasn't gone. I think if I think
that had changed, you would definitely know, and people would probably.

Speaker 3 (07:08):
I guess that's probably true. I guess it's probably true.
You probably be taking more pictures, like, look his hair's gone.

Speaker 1 (07:15):
Yeah it's gone, It's still there. It's funny. My one
friend always will ask me whenever she faced time she's
like he still got it, Like it doesn't even need
to say the word word bullet. I'm like, yeah, you
still got it. She's like, all right, because her boyfriend
right now is rocking this like handlebar mustache that she
absolutely hates, but I think it's a really good look
for him. She's like, do not encourage him. It looks

(07:35):
like shit. And I was like, okay, so that's that's
the question we asked of, Like you still got the handlebars.
She's like, you still got the mullet.

Speaker 3 (07:41):
That's funny, that's great. Now. Originally I think you and
I talked about the fashion show and you were going
to go, but like maybe bring our girlfriend because you
weren't sure if it was something that Roy would do.
But he's he's willing to go check it out too.

Speaker 1 (07:54):
Yeah, I mean, yeah, you're right. I was going to
invite one of my girlfriends to go instead, but he
jumped on the offfic unity. Surprisingly, once I decided yeah
I'll go and I don't really want to go alone,
he was like, oh, I'd like to go, and he honestly,
he really loves Vancouver as a city and he's I
think I've mentioned this before, but he has said time
and time again when people ask him, Oh, what are
your thoughts on Seattle, He's like, I like Seattle, but

(08:15):
Vancouver's better. And I'm like, can you just give Seattle
its flowers and not shit on Seattle and say how
great another country city is, right, I get it. Vancouver's
really cool and we I mean, if we were in
the market of leaving the United States, which wink wink, hintint,
I've brought up to Roy even before we moved out here,

(08:36):
that would be the place that we would go. But
that's we're in the US. Yes, yes, Seattle it is.

Speaker 3 (08:42):
Yeah, No, I even told you that. Like, even though
I'm not like a fashion person going to like a
fashion show like that, it sounds kind of cool. Like
that's like a fun thing to do. So I'm glad
he's going to it because I feel like it's it's
just it's not something you do on a regular basis,
so it's kind of a neat experience.

Speaker 1 (08:56):
Yeah. That and the opportunity to like network with other people.
There could be some networking opportunities for at least for
me and I don't know, something different.

Speaker 3 (09:07):
Yeah, you got any more parties that you're planning in
your future.

Speaker 1 (09:11):
Honestly, now that I put the pole in my office,
I don't want to host any more parties because I
don't want to take the powl down, and to be fair,
it's just so much effort to We probably won't host
until like June or July and do something out outside
in the backyard instead of doing it in my little
office space, just because it's as small space as is.

(09:32):
So I'm anticipating something in the summer, but no big
tea party like I did this time last year. Like
I'm seeing all those videos pop up now and a
lot of people on TikTok are liking that video or
commenting on my tea party video because 'tis the season
for tea parties, you know, spring tea parties or whatever.
But I'm not interested in doing that. Was so much

(09:52):
effort last year with all of the food and all
of the everything that no, we'll do summer parties.

Speaker 3 (10:00):
You could set up a little croquet things and do
a game of croquet in your backyard like in Heathers.

Speaker 1 (10:05):
You know, I thought about that.

Speaker 3 (10:06):
Have you seen Heathers.

Speaker 1 (10:09):
It's been a while. I don't know. I thought i'd
with a non rider.

Speaker 3 (10:13):
It's from it's from the.

Speaker 1 (10:14):
I think, yeah, I think I saw it in high school.

Speaker 3 (10:16):
But like they played croquet, like that's a normal, Like
it's so funny that it's like this thing that they're
doing is playing croquet, but like that's the first time
I've ever seen it. But it feels like a like
a fancy spring thing to do. That's a kind of
like something you do.

Speaker 1 (10:29):
Like ironically, they sell a lot of those at the
state sales. I see croquet sets all the time, and
so when I was yeah, so when I was really
looking for stuff to do for that party, I was
thinking about it, and then I was like, my backyard
is shitty. It's not a nice patch of green grass.
There's all these rocks, and it's a sloped hill down

(10:50):
the back that that doesn't work for croquete.

Speaker 3 (10:52):
It does not lend itself to croquet. Well, no, it
does not, Okay, I was just just curious. Yeah, I
realized I haven't seen your backyard. I haven't actually seeni
your house. Even though I was in Seattle, I didn't
come to your place. But I know I don't know
if I make it there ever again, if I ever
make it out to the Pacific Northwest against too far.
I've been wanting to get hit the road again anyway,

(11:13):
so like, uh for a little bits, like take little
trips and come back. Yeah, yeah, because I enjoyed it.
It's fun. But so what else is anything else going on?

Speaker 2 (11:21):
Is that it?

Speaker 3 (11:23):
Now?

Speaker 1 (11:23):
Dude? That's it? His life is boring. Not when you
are saving money for an expensive car repair. It's crazy
how you just end up not saving or spending any
money and saving because.

Speaker 3 (11:36):
Yeah, that was a good point, excellent point. Yeah, all right,
so your life was boring? Do you have any other like, actual,
let's take a break, let's wrap that up. Any other
the anniversary things you're gonna do or is it just
gonna be the trip? Like are you guys going to
try to like are you doing gifts and stuff too?

Speaker 1 (11:49):
So? Actually I just bought him a gift today and
he walked in as I was purchasing it, so I
closed it and I was like, well, I was getting
you something. He's like for what And I was like
for our anniversary and he's like people do that, but
oh Roy, but typically typically, like last year, he planned
the surprise for our anniversary, so he bought tickets to

(12:11):
the Smith Tower we went and had a cocktail. He
paid for the cocktail. I got the dinner, but he
purchased that experience and it was really nice. So I
don't I mean, a gift would be nice. But if
we go to a super fancy restaurant in Vancouver, like
I'm assuming we probably will, I'll be fine with that.
But I so he has a a recent obsession with

(12:32):
making tiki drinks, that is his. The amount of rum
we have in our house is borderline insane.

Speaker 3 (12:40):
I could get that.

Speaker 1 (12:41):
I like, every time we travel to Portland or we
like we travel anywhere, he's looking at the alcohol prices
and comparing it to Seattle prices and going like, oh,
maybe I should buy this. So we have banana liqueur,
we have pineapple rum. We have, like I want to say,
at least ten to fifteen different flavors of rum. He

(13:02):
got tiki cocktail books for Christmas. He got tiki mugs
for Christmas, and he wants more because it's a fun
collection and the more people we have over all, the
variety of fun tiki mugs and drinks and everything. So
I bought him two new tiki mugs that he's been
touched fun about wanting. So, yeah, when I.

Speaker 3 (13:21):
Used to have the parties at the house, I would
make a punch of rum punch that I call it
pregnancy punch because two different people, two different people that
I knew, that got pregnant after drinking it and going
home that night. But it was like a full bottle
of white rum, a full bottle of dark row. It
was one of those like big gatoray things you would
drink at like after soccer games, you.

Speaker 1 (13:39):
Know, like it was oh my god.

Speaker 3 (13:41):
Yeah. So it was a yeah, full full gallon of
white rum, full gallon of dark rum, a full gallon
of a full jar of one fife, a full hundred whatever,
a giant bottle of malibu rum, so the coconut rum
as well, and then like a pineapple juice, orange juice,
and like a thing of sprite and then all ice

(14:02):
until it mix it all in and it tasted amazing.
It did not taste like alcohol at all. It was so.

Speaker 1 (14:07):
Dangerous and that's why you call it what it is.

Speaker 3 (14:09):
Yeah. Yeah, Basically you'd have a couple of SIPs of
it and be like, oh, this is good, I'll just
drink more of this, and then like two cups in
you'd realize you can't stand so rum is fun like that.
That's what I do. Like RUMA like flavored RUMs like that.

Speaker 1 (14:21):
I mean, I've really been more of a gin girl.
And then now that he's been in this rum phase,
I'm like, oh, I was wrong. I think I like
rum drinks a lot more. He's he started lighting them
on fire. I mean, oh nice, it's crazy. I'm like,
when we finally host the summer party and do maybe
we'll do like a luel or something. I don't know,
He'll definitely have to flex that muscle, because it is

(14:43):
he's gotten so much better just over the past three
or four months.

Speaker 3 (14:46):
The lighting on fire, that's badass too. That's fun. That's
a lot of fun.

Speaker 1 (14:49):
It was crazy. I was like, he just I forget
what he did to the line, but he just like
lit the lime and there was like a little pool
of alcohol in the lime and then just lit it
and it's like, oh, okay, cool, here's your drink.

Speaker 3 (15:01):
Like this is insane.

Speaker 1 (15:02):
You know how much this would be at a bar
in Seattle? That's right, that's right, it's like twenty two
dollars cocktail.

Speaker 3 (15:09):
Yeah, at home, that's funny. Yeah, Well, that's great. That's awesome.
That's awesome. I that's a good way to I just
went to a restaurant recently, really like fancy sushi restaurant,
but they had one drink on that they like that
was that same type of thing. It was like in
these big plastic cups and it was like Malibu rum
and all this like flavored RUMs and they had lucky
terms in it and stuff like that and like the

(15:30):
can of the cereal. Yeah, it was really but it
was so out of character for the actual bar. But
I guess they have enough people that want something that's
a little a little crazy that they do that that's
really cool. So I almost tried one, but I was like,
I don't know if I really want it, like I
want to get I don't think I'm gonna get that
fucked up, Like if I have one, If I have
one of those, like that's gonna knock me on my ass.
If I can drinkvodgaraa ball all day and be fine,
but like one of those will just like get, you know,

(15:51):
knock me down.

Speaker 1 (15:53):
Yeah, there's the way that Roy makes his drinks too.
I probably have seventy five percent of it and then
just give the res to him. I'm like, it's strong
as fuck, and he's like, perfect, this is the extra
I want it anyway. So he ends up drinking what
I don't finish because I feel it really quickly.

Speaker 3 (16:09):
That's funny. That's funny, all right. Well, now that you're
boring life cheese, Hey, Roy saved it with his with
his tiki tricks, like everything I said. That saves it
right there.

Speaker 1 (16:20):
Oh, you've got a cool hobby. I also have cool hobbies.

Speaker 3 (16:23):
It's just not sales and you know, picking up china. No,
the pull dame is cool. We talked about that. Though
there's nothing new. Have you done any new tricks and
a new poll tricks that we don't know about.

Speaker 1 (16:34):
There is this move called a jade and it's there.
You're inverted and you're very splitty on the pole, so
it looks like you're not actually doing a full split
upside down, but it looks like it as you arch
your back and you pull your leg for that skin contact. Yeah,
that that's been probably the Well. I'm taking l three classes,

(16:55):
so I can't even remember half the hard ship that
we end up doing, but that one specific move I
can do pretty well now. And consistently. So that's a
fun party trick.

Speaker 3 (17:05):
That's what. That's what. There we go. You can have
a tiki party, drink some round drinks, and then go
do some upside down pull tricks.

Speaker 1 (17:12):
Honestly, yeah, just please.

Speaker 3 (17:14):
Set up a camera for that, because I feel like
that's gonna be something that should be on video.

Speaker 1 (17:18):
I have my tripod set up in the corner so perfect.
I'm ready, you're all ready.

Speaker 3 (17:25):
Okay, Well we're gonna take a quick break and come back.
We'll you know, talking to about the boring shit I've
been doing.

Speaker 1 (17:31):
And then then oh, Adam said the boring shit that
he's been doing. But Adam has been so busy lately,
just in the Tulsa comedy scene, and I'm so impressed
by how you've gone back out there and built more
connections and now you're like the person people call upon

(17:51):
in Tulsa.

Speaker 3 (17:52):
Yeah, it's it has been. It has been fun. It's
funny that it took me like a year. I feel
like the first the first year I was here, I
really I was going out a little bit, but I
wasn't really kind of pushing. And then I kind of
started getting some opportunities and I made the most of them,
and that's really helped. It is hard when you go
to a new scene to really establish yourself as someone
who has experienced in this because they don't know. You

(18:13):
could just be some random asshole that just says you've
been doing comedy for a while. And I will say
that the people in the scene have seen me gon
on stage at open mics and say, oh, you do
know you're doing just because there's little tell just in
the stage presence, in the way that I know how
to tell till you know a bit, so that it
hasn't But it has been nice, and it has been busy,
and I started a book. It's funny because margin has

(18:33):
been extremely busy where right now in the beginning of April,
my April is almost completely empty. But then May gets
really busy again. So I'm sure I'll book some things
over this month, but right now I don't really have
a lot, which is fine.

Speaker 1 (18:44):
I think you'll get things last minute in April, though,
because that's kind of been the trend for you lately,
is that they need somebody, they call you, you're available,
you hop on and save the day.

Speaker 3 (18:53):
That's right, did I did I talk I talked about
the comedy emergency that I had, right, did the comedy
emergency story? Did I talk about the lost everything? That
was kind of a fun It was kind of a
fun story. I was, Actually it was. It was on
a date. It was a Friday night date, kind of
a date. That's a whole other thing that I'll talk
about a second. But anyways, we went out and we

(19:14):
it was like five We met it like five at
this restaurant and we're sent at the bar, eating food
and chatting, and then from there went over to another
bar and we're there and around. I had my phone
upside down, you know, a face down, not upside down,
face down, and which I guess is upside down if
you'l got it a certain way, but we'll just call
it facedown. Yeah, I guess yes. And at one point
I just flipped over to see what time it was,

(19:35):
and I had like four missed calls from the comedy
club here and and a text, and so I called
the number and into the manager and she says, I
need you here like immediately, And I was like, what
what do you mean? It's kind of an emergency. I
need you to come for the late show tonight. Can
you come and I'm like, well, I've been downtown just
kind of hanging out and drinking. I said, you know,

(19:56):
I can be there, but I want to be fifteen
minutes from now. She goes, that's fine, we're not going
to start the show to the here. So I was
like okay. So I say to my date, I say, so,
there's a comedy emergency, and how do you feel about
taking an adventure. She's like, I'm down for an adventure.
So we go to my car and we just start
heading there and I have my phone on the little console.

(20:19):
I a little magnet thing up there so I can
see it while I'm driving.

Speaker 2 (20:21):
And.

Speaker 3 (20:23):
I told my phone to text, uh, the name of
the manager and the club is called Looney Bin, that
I was on my way, and what my eta was.
It was funny that we drive there. We're just talking
about general stuff and as we get there and we
pull up to the club and my day gets She goes, oh,
it's called the Looney Bit. She goes, I was trying
to figure out, like, let's say that the mander's name is,

(20:44):
you know, like Anna or whatever. It was like, you know,
text Anna Looney Bin that I'm on my way or whatever.
She thought that I like had her like that or
that's how I had her in my phone because she
was crazy or something. It was like I was calling
her a looney bin and she's like, oh, it's the
name of the comedy club, you know. So we we
go in and and we get in there and the
managers like, oh, thank god you're here. I need you

(21:04):
to go up and do about twenty minutes. I was like, Okay,
what's going on, Like this is just crazy And.

Speaker 1 (21:10):
Apparently she didn't tell you that on the phone or
through the test.

Speaker 3 (21:14):
That's fine, that's good. Yeah, that's the twenty minutes. Just
like that's easy. That's like, that's like, you know whatever.
Like someone was just like, hey, I need you to
just stand here for twenty minutes. I mean I can
talk for twenty minutes easily, but I have twenty minutes
of material. So yeah, it was the and not to
I have to tried a little careful with what I'm
saying because I'm not going to say the names of
the comics. Maybe people who did some research might bill

(21:36):
figured it out. But there was a celebrity comic who
was there who was a little bit older, and he
was there for two shows Friday to Saturday was the
originally the plan and apparently the first show on Friday,
which started at like seven thirty normal comedy shows, for
those that don't know, there's a host who usually does
about ten minutes, You've got your feature actor who does

(21:56):
about thirty, and then your headliner usually does forty five
to an hour, so that that way people get there.
It's about a ninety one hundred minute show is pretty
standard for comedy. Well, like apparently the headliner got on
stage and after about fifteen to twenty minutes said he's older,
he's a celebrity. He started crying and having issues and
like saying that like he just couldn't remember. He kept

(22:18):
repeating himself and like say saying that he was so
sorry that people would see him like this blah blah
blah blah, and and like the audience members were like
giving him tissues like this is like it was like
apparently one of the most uncomfortable things ever. And he
stayed up there and just kept and like until eventually
they're they're like, okay, well you know your time is up,
you can get off stage or whatever, and you know,

(22:39):
he just was apologizing and not doing a lot of
material and not doing what people paid a decent amount
of money.

Speaker 1 (22:44):
Or there not funny, right and not funny, not laughing,
And so.

Speaker 3 (22:48):
The manager needed me to go up and do more
time after the host, so that way there was like
less time that he had to be on stage. So
that way, if he was going to do that again,
all he needed to do was be on stage for
twenty minutes, and they've gotten their money's worth it as
like in the one hundred minute show range. So I
go up and I do my you know, twenty minutes
does really well. The audiences loves it, and my Day's

(23:09):
just sit in the audience watching, and then I go
back and I'm like, all right, well we can go now.
And so then we leave and and they asked me
to come back on Saturday and host the shows on
Saturday because they want me to be able to do
like longer times and everything too. So I'm like, sure,
I'll come back tomorrow as well. And as we're driving back,
my Day was of course was like, oh, you're funny.

(23:29):
That was really great, and I was like, well, thank you,
that's great to hear, and she was kind of impressed
by the idea of the comedy emergency like that they
called me. So that was, Yes, that was very exciting,
very very rewarding to have them come to me for that,
and it did happen the next night too. He was like, yeah,
we don't think that he should be doing comedy anymore.
We feel like maybe he's reached a point and then

(23:50):
maybe he's just his either health physical health, mental health,
maybe he shouldn't be doing it anymore. So there was
a discussion later on with his agents and stuff like
that about his ability. So and just recently, actually two
days ago, he just got arrested for drug possession in Burbank.

Speaker 1 (24:05):
Oh fun, which is weird.

Speaker 3 (24:07):
Because he was not like, I didn't see me on
drugs unless he was coming down from drugs. I really
don't know. I can't really speak to that. But yeah,
that was that was definitely a fun, like a fun
experience being able to do that and being able to
like rescue them. And so now I've been there a
bunch of times. I'm gonna be going by there tomorrow night,
not because I have to host everything, but just because
it's good for me to kind of keep giving them

(24:28):
kind of FaceTime show in and just see what shows
need hosts and what shows need and then I can
and then he'd be like, Okay, you want to host
this week and or whatever. So I've hosted a few
weekends since then two and it's been a lot of fun.
I really love the club environment, and I really enjoy
this club too. The only Bin Intelsa is a really
fantastic club, so I like they do and I actually
really like it as well. So I like being a
big part of that.

Speaker 1 (24:48):
That's awesome. Okay, Now back to this date situation that
you led with but said I will get back to later.
What's going on?

Speaker 3 (24:55):
I will. Yes, we matched on Bumble and we're just chatting,
and she just kind of said, she's like interrupted, just
I don't know what we're talking. I'm just gonna be
blunt with you, Like I have some ideas for a
project that I think would be amazing and I would
really like to, uh to work with you on it,
and I think you would be perfect for it, and
I think it just we should probably meet and talk
about it, and so I just I'd rather just get

(25:16):
off the app and do that. I was like, okay, cool,
So we we did. We met and talked and had
a good conversation and she wanted to. She was like,
I just I really like your eye for things, and
I'm trying to, uh, she's trying to get involved in
not involved, but reinvolved, and she just moved to Telsa
in being a finndom. Oh okay, yeah, and she wants

(25:41):
to try to get some photos and stuff like this
she can use and kind of that kind of exude
that type of the type of sense and stuff like that.
She was like, and just like, I looked at your
Instagram and I kind of feel like you could be
someone that would be cool like that, you know, it'd
be really neat, and so I'd really like to, you know,
try that. So we we did. We did get together,
did a photo shoot and someone came out really cool
and she was really happy. And she told me later,

(26:02):
she goes, I'm really usually really uncomfortable around photos of myself,
Like I don't know how to pose stuff like that.
She goes, but I just felt like really like in
tune and safe, and that was great and I appreciate it.
And then she asked me to do some like traditional
photos of her and her friend that are starting a
business and they she asked me to to like do
something they wanted some like kind of casual shots of
them just doing business together, you know, stuff like that

(26:23):
they could use for their website, and which is totally
out of my out of my you know, my comfort zone.
Professional professional wearing clothes. What's what's going on here?

Speaker 1 (26:32):
I don't know, that's weird.

Speaker 3 (26:33):
Yeah, yeah, it's so fucking weird.

Speaker 1 (26:34):
Public setting, isn't ye?

Speaker 3 (26:36):
Public seting? Yeah?

Speaker 1 (26:37):
Public?

Speaker 3 (26:37):
No, Public's fine? Yeah, like, wait, you guys want to
be dressed in public? What the hell is going on here?
So yeah, so that was that was kind of funny.
But yeah, it turned out that they actually turned out
really good. I was really happy with them, and they
were really happy with them too. But so we've been
out a couple of times. We've been to Runch too,
and we've we've had like and we connect really well.
But I don't I haven't been able to get the

(26:58):
since there's an intimacy because I think also when you
get the photos. But I also told her when I
take photos, I turn off anything like that. I want
to make sure I'm very professional. And she she understood that,
and she said, you were like that. But I also
so I don't know because it's like, I don't think
we've gone out that wasn't related to somehow to discussing
the photography. So I guess it depends on when we

(27:19):
get together again, what how things feel?

Speaker 1 (27:22):
Okay? So wait, the first date was your comedy emergency,
second time you hung out was photos, and the third
time was photos too.

Speaker 3 (27:32):
Yes, yeah that's a there's photos. And then and then
I made her and her friend take me out to
the fancy sushi.

Speaker 1 (27:38):
Place for dinner, right right right, yeah, so you just
need a bar, just.

Speaker 3 (27:43):
Let's hang out and yeah, I don't come to karaoke,
Kim do something like that. Yeah, yeah, And then I
had I had a really cool thing happened too. I'm
going to tell you about that when we come back
from this next break.

Speaker 1 (27:55):
Boo, all the breaks, I.

Speaker 3 (27:57):
Know, all the breaks, but you know what I love.
I love the cliffhangers. Just that's the fun part. What's
gonna happen? So tell us. I can't remember if I
actually mentioned anything, so I had, I hadn't. I mean,
I know I talked about the art show. So I
had an art show at this bar called Lot Number six.
It's an art bar that's been around for years and
the owner loves arts. She's an artist too, and so

(28:18):
she does art shows once a month. She'll bring artists
in residence, so all different types of art and allow
them to have their own shows. And she doesn't charge
anything for it. And you get up months and just
hanging your stuff. You can put like R codes, people
can buy stuff. So I had I had one back
in I think it was September of this year, and
I had about eighteen of my pieces, yeah, twenty my
pieces on the wall there and and I sold four pieces,

(28:42):
which was pretty cool, and it was people liked it.
I got a lot of people, you know, mentioning it.
But there were pieces of my models that I did
obviously shot, but also there was the one of me
the giant like twenty four by sixty naked one of
me red all in red on the couch basically like yeah,
I know, you know it, ye yes, And the one

(29:02):
that I was at Nude Night in Orlando too for
a little stint, and it it was very popular that
people kept I would would like kind of take pictures
and tag me in it and be like, well, I've
seen Adam naked now because obviously not ignoring the fact
there's all these other like naked models are awhere, but
just the fact that you know that obviously the art
that I'm there too. Anyways, when the art show finished,

(29:25):
I was talking to the owner and she was saying,
this is like a month or two later. We were
discussing our shows and how much I appreciate it, and
she mentioned that one of her friends and she'd recently
done a show and they'd given her one of her pieces.
One of their pieces is a thank you. And I
was like, oh, you know that that's true. If there's
anything of mine that you want, like, I'd be happy
to give you one of my pieces is a thank
you because I really do appreciate it. And she goes,
I'm gonna be honest with you, I really want that

(29:45):
red piece. She goes, that is one of the coolest
like self shot photos that I've seen in a while.
It's got this power to it. It's got this like
it's like humble but also like really strong and just
it's it's a it's a fantastic piece. I would love
to if I could have it. I was like, sure, yeah, sure,
it's yours, like you're gonna hang in your bedroom. I'm
guessing right, and like above the bed. She's like, I

(30:08):
don't know if my boyfriend I appreciate that one or not.
She goes, but I do want to hang it at
the bar, and so she has been waiting to try
to figure out where she wants to hang it at
the bar because and understandably so, she didn't want to
put it too like load to the ground, where like
people when if no one's paying attention to someone like
like graffiti on it or right on it, or try
to steal it, arguably or do something like that, because

(30:29):
you know, she like that happens. And you know these
drunk bar when people get really drunk, and this is
the bar where people get really drunk and it gets
packed too. So she actually find a spot that was
like higher up on our wall that she had moved
some stuff around, and finally installed it on we're recording
this on tuesdays. She installed it on Friday or Saturday, Saturday,
I think, and she texted me and a picture of
it and said it's on the wall. And so now

(30:50):
it's like permanently, that's cool. Yeah, it's permanently a part
of the part of the bar, and uh, and it's
great and your legends, and yeah, it was like even
when when I'm long gone, like I feel like that
piece is still gonna stay there. That's really kind of neat,
totally funny story about it. For during the during the
actual show, it was closer to kind of like eye
levels about where it was hanging on the on the

(31:13):
art wall. And there's a comedian who's doing a documentary
about Tulsa comedy and like he recently recorded me in
the documentary and he did it in my living room
and as we were looking at the photos that he
took some still photos too, I realized that right over
my shoulder was like one of my photos. So basically
just like there's like Vagina's right you know, like my
head level. And I was just like, that's that's funny,

(31:34):
and so he goes, yeah, you got like you got
the Vaninas. And then I when I recorded Terrell, there
was a naked you in the background. I was like,
what do you mean. He goes, well, we did it
at the bar because he wanted to do it that bar.
And then we realized afterwards that you were in the
background the entire time that we were recording the documentary.
So I thought that was pretty funny too.

Speaker 1 (31:52):
You would that would be the case. I remember when
you were planning for that guy to come over for
the interview and I mentioned your outfit that you should
wear something. But then I was like, where are you
gonna sit? What's the background going to look like? You're like,
I'm not worried about that.

Speaker 3 (32:08):
And of course that's just vaginas everywhere.

Speaker 1 (32:11):
So that's Adam.

Speaker 3 (32:13):
Yes, yes, that's just that's that's my house. Yeah, so
it's but it's been everything that's been going good. Photography
is good. I've got a new project I'm working on.
Comedy is good. People who live anywhere near Tulsa or
Arkansas or Missouri. I'm gonna have shows in Arkansas and
Missouri coming up in May. So if you live anywhere
like that, just check out my Facebook. I have them
on there pinned right now, but or just messaging me

(32:35):
and I'll tell you when and where they are. So
those will be fun shows. And yeah, what else had
I I went and saw the Violent Fems, which I
was really excited about. I told you about that just
last week. That was a fun concert. I don't have
many concerts and that was a fun one and it
was perfectly designed for old people.

Speaker 1 (32:52):
Did you have to stand the whole time?

Speaker 3 (32:53):
Unfortunately? Yes, that was the one thing. There was no
no seats like at the Shrek Rave It was like
everything was standing only. But then there was like three
tables they just had and so like I grabbed a
seat at one of those. Is like I found my home.
I can just sit here and people watch. But nothing
like that of LFMS. But they did it. They, like
I said, they were over. It was such a short
show relatively speaking, because they knew that all their audience
members were older people, so that they didn't want to

(33:15):
keep them out too late on a Monday night. But yeah,
so that's again that's been going on. And was there
anything else? I think that's probably most of my life.
That's that's worth worth mentioning.

Speaker 1 (33:27):
That's a solid update.

Speaker 3 (33:28):
Yeah, solid update.

Speaker 1 (33:29):
That's less boring than me.

Speaker 3 (33:30):
So I accept that yours wasn't as boring. I was
just yeah, so let's uh, I guess we'll go ahead
and take our.

Speaker 1 (33:38):
Let's break and get to the topic of you know,
men and their food.

Speaker 3 (33:43):
Yes, exactly, we're gon We're gonna explore men and food
when we.

Speaker 1 (33:46):
Come back, before we address anything to do with men.
Let's talk about one of my favorite topics and something
that went viral around summertime last year, which is.

Speaker 2 (34:01):
You were on.

Speaker 1 (34:02):
TikTok or on girl Dinner, Girl Dinner. If you you've
probably heard the viral sound at some point or another.
But these videos one, it encapsulated my life pre being
in a relationship because I was known for what eating
shredded cheese over from the bag over my sink, or
putting together you know, pasta with butter and some parmesan

(34:25):
and calling that a meal, just very low effort. And
so in a lot of these girl Dinner videos, it
was women making just snack plates of food. You know,
they'd have their pickles and their grapes or whatever they
could find, and it was it looked like a bunch
of random pantry items on one plate. But there was
low effort, no cooking, no special plating, no planning, just

(34:47):
girl dinner vibes. Maybe it's just a glass of wine,
I don't know. If you're not hungry, then you don't
need to eat something if you're not starving, right, So
what there was there was a conversation around you know,
eating disorders, and people had a problem with that from
some level, which sure, some people are making jokes like
my girl dinner is ice and I'm like, okay, that's
not realistic.

Speaker 3 (35:07):
But that's for the majority.

Speaker 1 (35:13):
But for the majority of people who were actually showing
real meals that they were eating that were classified as
girl dinner, this concept kind of challenged the gender norms
of what women typically do, which is when they're in
relationships is we're gonna cook, we're gonna clean, we're gonna
take care of the home. And the cooking portion of that,
of all three meals you have to have breakfast, lunch,

(35:35):
and dinner, dinner is the most important one because your
spouse comes home from work and they don't have to cook.
It's them asking what's for dinner. So this challenges that
going like, well, fuck it, it's what's ever in the pantry,
and that's what girl dinner is. And that's why I
love this trend because I'm like, it's not just me
who feels this way, it's other women who are like,
I'm not cooking, I'm not preparing anything. It's whatever I

(35:59):
can find.

Speaker 3 (36:00):
Yeah. Well, the funny thing is I think that you know,
maybe in the early days we kind of joke about
you eating the you know, shorategies out of the bag
as like your dinner and then like finding out that
not only were you not alone, but it was a
like it was like an epidemic of people doing that,
of a woman doing that. That that was that was
funny as hell. And to be honest, I'm more on

(36:21):
that side as far as what like I if I'm
hungry and like I don't need to make something like,
I'll like be like, okay, I'm gonna take two string cheese,
you know, unwrap them and maybe wrap a piece of
pepperoni around each one and call it a meal. Like
if it's just something, I'm like, I need food in
my stomach just so I can like continue moving. So
like for me, that like I kind of I love
the concept of it. There's a bar here called Rabbit

(36:43):
Hole that has their a girl Dinner on their menu
and it is it's two chicken wings. It's home. Remember,
it's like two chicken wings, some celery sticks and carrot sticks,
and then it has like, uh, like a couple like
like minor things with it too, Like it's it's like
a couple of pieces of like cheese and then some

(37:04):
of that's like and it's just like, you know, it
just kind of nice, a little like Medley, Yes, exactly,
And so it's their girl Dinner special, and I think
it's great. I think I don't know, like I think
if you with w women who live alone, why do
you know, why do you need to cook for yourself
unless you're like you mena do all the meal prop

(37:24):
and stuff like that. You know, when Roy's busy or
not he not when he's out of town? What is
your what is your normal dinner? Has it changed my
go to?

Speaker 1 (37:35):
So now that I well, part of the reason for
girl dinner for me anyways was because I didn't really
cook a lot, So my just my knowledge of easy
meals I could make and throw together in twenty thirty minutes.
I didn't really have a whole lot to choose from.
But now that that's expanded, I think I kind of
my go to is like I'll do a quick pokeble

(37:56):
which just like crabby some cut up some cucumbers, get
the rice, and throw on a couple other toppings to
kind of dress it up. If that's me being fancy
while he's gone, and that's like lower effort for me.
If I'm if I'm like low, low effort, it's noodles
with it's pasta with butter and parmesan, or it's a

(38:16):
cheesecake cdio with sour cream and some low taste seasoning
from Trader Joe's. Those are my two go tos. If
I really am just I just want a dirty one
potter pan, that's it. Those are my two.

Speaker 3 (38:27):
I feel like that's that's actually bougied up a lot
more than your old days and in Nashville, because the
old days in Nashville were like like would you just
like rice and beans, but like you wouldn't have a
low day seasoning from Trader Joe's back then, I don't think.

Speaker 1 (38:40):
No, No, it would be I'd probably have some kind
of cracker, some triscuit or cracker and some cheese that
I would cut up and I'd eat that, and it'd
be it'd be cheese and crackers with some kind of fruit,
mostly grapes or whatever else I had, And then if
I was still hungry, I'd probably eat more cheese.

Speaker 3 (39:00):
You know, it's good to know that. You know, when
I was married that we were trendsetters because Amy and
I would do that. Sometimes we would just have like
nights where neither of us really felt like anything for dinner.
So we would have like summer sausage and different cups
of you know, like four different types of cheese, and
like two different types of crackers, and then Amy drank wine.
I would have coke zero or something, and then we
would just sit at the table at the at the

(39:22):
like the couch and just yeah, I would not have
to the dinner table, but like sit at the couch
and just have you know, cheese and crackers and little
sausage and just kind of eat until we were full,
you know, like the little snack bites. Usually she had
some mustard and mayo and then you could dab on
there to add a little like you know, condiments, and
then that was that was it. Like it was never like,
oh we need more than that. It was great. And

(39:43):
so that was a I feel like that that's that's
the smart thing to do. That's a clever way to
you know, just to make sure you're full, because I mean,
I feel like food is an obnoxious thing, and I
would kind of wish that we just didn't have to eat.
We just take a pill and never eat, and that'd
be ideal for me.

Speaker 1 (39:56):
Yeah, we've talked about this. Yeah, I just I, especially
during busy times, I don't wanna have to go to
the grocery store and pre plan out all And I
see the benefit of meal prepping for sure, of taking
one day and just making all of this food, basically
all these leftovers for the rest of the week that
because you're preparing so much. I think that's fine because

(40:17):
I'm not having to cook every single day. If I
have to use my brain every single day, it goes
back to decision making, and we just get so exhausted
with having to make so many choices throughout our day,
and this just becomes one more choice of, oh my god,
what am I making for dinner instead of oh, well,
I know, I bought some stuff from the grocery store.
What can I whip together? That's really easy? And I

(40:38):
don't want to clean a lot after I'm done with
my workday either, Like I'm not dirtying ten pans for
one meal that I could potentially be disappointed about if
I fuck it up. You know, that's the other thing.
So I know, girl, dinner, it's gonna at least be
good and satisfy me, and I'll be full and I'll
go to sleep after exactly.

Speaker 3 (40:56):
That sounds pretty pair. Today today, actually up some ground
sausage or not grilled up. I cooked up some ground
sausage for tacos the other day, so I still had
some of that left it in a tupperware. So I
just took toastedo scoops and put them in a bowl,
and then I cut up little pieces of Elveda like
so they were like little tiny cubes, and then sprinkled

(41:16):
it throughout it, and then put the ground sausage, the
cold ground sausage in there, and then just nuked it
for like a minute and a half and I had nachos.
Basically it was perfect. That was my dinner tonight.

Speaker 1 (41:26):
So people online call those poverty nachos.

Speaker 3 (41:32):
Aren't all nachos poverty nachas, Like I feel like the
best kind of nachos are poverty nachos. Like you like,
if the fancier you have nachos, the worst they get,
like they're like, you know, you want it to be
that like cheese that like oozes out and melts and
has like almost a Plasta scene feel to it, because
like that's the only tape of cheese that gets that
like that dips thing that you you know that you
really want.

Speaker 1 (41:53):
So, in my opinion, no, I agree, that is another
girl dinner option for me though, is poverty. Nachos is
just cheese, some salsa, sour cream and that's it. Low ingredients,
low effort, takes two minutes, Max, I'm in.

Speaker 3 (42:09):
You're right. So we've explored girl dinner. I want to
know now, like, what is where did that get to us? From?
From that to this topic that you you'd come up with,
do you want to get into that? Do you want
to take a break and come back and come back?

Speaker 1 (42:24):
We should take a break. We should take a break.
We'll simmer on this, take a break, and we'll be
right back into how this elabrary.

Speaker 3 (42:30):
Amongst yourselves and we'll be right back.

Speaker 1 (42:36):
Okay, The story behind this whole conversation around men and
food and girl dinner is because the dreaded question in
our household, at least for me, is what's for dinner?
And like I said, pre relationship, I didn't give a
fuck what I was eating for dinner. It was whatever

(42:57):
I could find. And so yes, Roy has taught me
a lot of valuable skills in the kitchen that I
am really appreciative of, but there's a level of I
don't want to fucking think about dinner tonight. Can can
you just handle dinner? It becomes this like back and
forth of Okay, well, i'll make dinner two nights a week,
you'll make dinner two nights a week. What are we
doing the other nights? And the extra like hassle that

(43:20):
goes with that instead of just like, can we just
do whatever we want to do and just call it
a meal?

Speaker 2 (43:26):
You know?

Speaker 1 (43:27):
And I just think the expectation of there's going to
be something big for dinner has to have some chicken
or you know what I mean, some kind of chicken
or fish options some yeah, some protein, some carb, some
vegetable in a nice packaged.

Speaker 3 (43:45):
It was the specific, because there was a specific trigger
for this that made you couldn't want to talk about
it because it was one night or something that like.
And that's when you said, hey, we should do this
as a topic too, like something for dinner. He was like,
what are we doing for dinner or something like that,
and he was mad that you didn't want to cook it,
that you weren't like You're like, I don't, I don't
care whatever, and he didn't have time to cook or something,

(44:06):
but he wanted a dinner.

Speaker 1 (44:09):
Well, part of it is so I finished work earlier
in the evening, like typically around four thirty, and he'll
sometimes finish work at like he's supposed to end at
five thirty, but sometimes that will kind of bleed over
into the six six thirty range, and by that point
in time that asking the question what's for dinner at
five or six o'clock is a losing question because I

(44:33):
don't fucking know, Because if we don't have the ingredients
in our house that you want for dinner, if we
haven't planned this a couple days in advance, then we're
doing our own thing for dinner, and it's going to
be a girl dinner for me and whatever you can
find for you. And so I think that's where the
frustration was of He asked the question later in the afternoon,
knowing that neither of one of us had gone grocery

(44:54):
shopping over the past couple of days, and I'm like, two,
you're out of luck. We're too late for this question.
You can't ask that. I I don't have a problem
cooking dinner at least a couple times a week. That's
kind of our agreement is we switch off, which is fine,
but I have to know earlier in the day or
early on in the week so I can buy all
the stuff to know, Okay, you know I'm gonna make

(45:16):
dinner Tuesday and Thursday, because those are the nights I
don't have pole that I can cook it and whatever.
So I buy those things and plan it. And so
it leads into the problem of asking later in the
afternoon and not planning what we're doing for dinner. And
it can't just rely on me planning what's gonna be
for dinner or asking the question to him so that
he thinks about it and then goes out and gets

(45:37):
stuff for dinner, because why am I the responsible one
to think about what's for dinner? Because truly, if it
was up to me for what's for dinner, I'm not
fucking picking anything that you would like. I would be
picking noodles and butter and just something basic. So and
it bothers me.

Speaker 3 (45:56):
Yeah. Yeah, But in Roy's mind, whether whether he's cooking
or you are, like, dinners should be a thing like
it should be like a dinner, like it like not
it's it's not like okay to just have, like you said, noodles,
Like it's like you should have your proteins and you
should have like you want it to, like, you know,
a steak and baked potato and your broccoli or whatever.
Like is that kind of like he just ideally that's

(46:18):
what he pictures his dinner.

Speaker 1 (46:20):
He will never say that. He will never say that,
but there will be times where I'm like, hey, I
don't have a plan for dinner, but I can make this,
And then he sees what I'm making and goes, oh,
I don't want that because it's not because it's not
up to like in my mind, I just think it's
not up to his standard. And I'm like, cool, suit yourself,
figure out dinner for yourself. That if that's because I'm

(46:41):
willing to give you extra you know, all of the
food that I'm already making, which I don't mind, yep,
but because it's something so simple and he's not saying
that this has to be the most outrageous, outlandish meal
for dinner. But there's a lot of like our handful
of meals that we rotate through are poke bowls. Will

(47:02):
do a Southwest salad with either chicken or shrimp. We'll
do he does a salmon with rice and some kind
of roasted vegetables. He'll do a stew. I'll do you know,
tacos and fahtahs, So meals like that that do have
a clearly defined protein instead of just whatever. And I

(47:26):
think that's kind of been the big thing, is actually
having a protein. Where I used to be a vegetarian
for it was very short lived. But I don't need
to have a protein with every meal. So if I'm
gonna whip up something quickly and I think about planning it,
there has to be like chicken sausage in the pasta
for him to be interested in it, because it needs that,
it needs something more, you.

Speaker 3 (47:47):
Know, he's like a subconscious thing. Then the need I
don't like he's has. Maybe it was his at home mom,
the type too always cooked dinner.

Speaker 1 (47:57):
I I would say no, but I don't. I don't
really know the answer to that. Like my mom was
not the one to cook dinner. We would eat out
a couple times a week and then she would do
really quick and easy meals, and so that kind of
translated into me not cooking. Where I think for Roy's
dad and stepmom's side, they definitely do a lot more
of the cooking and preparing, so that's probably where he

(48:19):
got it from. But even then, like, okay, then you
make then if you want something like that, then you
can make the meal. It's never the expectation that I
have to cook all of the meals in the house.
Like we have a very good agreement, but like when
it's not pre planned, it becomes a disappointment for dinner
because I'm not making something that's like up to par

(48:42):
for him, where I'm like, can't you just eat? I mean,
to be fair, he did have popcorn the other night
for dinner because we had a huge lunch and I
was very shocked by it. I was like, I'm just
making popcorn. If you want something else, you can and
he just ate popcorn and had a cocktail and that
was so. I mean, like he did girl dinner recently,
but it's not it's not a normal during the week
thing for him.

Speaker 3 (49:03):
Yeah, And I do think that you know that. I
think that obviously not not and this isn't about Roy,
but I think there are a lot of men who
expect you know their their partner, even even in apparently
even in I've read this, even like in Millennial relationships
which would be more enlightened. As far as gender norms,
women still fulfill more of the household duties than men do,

(49:27):
which is which is interesting. I mean it's just like
it's like you just kind of fall into it somehow.
So I do think that there's probably a lot of men, yeah,
who just like the meal planning is just not part
of their you know, their their daily thing that they
just want to be able to eat. They don't really
want to know, you know, like they don't really want
to have to think about it, but they want it
to be a good something that they like, you know,
it has to be you know, like good dinner, not

(49:49):
just not just food.

Speaker 1 (49:50):
Yeah, and that's frustrating being in a relationship going, oh,
it's equal, well why aren't you. It's it's not even
the fact of, you know, we split the meals or whatever.
It's the planning element that I think men fall short
on of. I'm not going to have nothing in the
fridge until my next grocery trip. I'm at least going

(50:12):
to have a couple of extra things in the freezer
and something in the pantry as an emergency meal to
get me through until the next time I needed to
go to the grocery. But sometimes Roy's not like that,
and he has literally no food for lunch and has
to run to the grocery store during his lunch break
and come back and make something for lunch because he
didn't plan it. And I'm like, this is so preventable,

(50:34):
Why why are we not preventing this? But he doesn't
mind it, but it's like for me, that's just such
a foreign concept. I would never be here.

Speaker 3 (50:41):
But that's what that's why door dash exists in my
in my world, rather than run to the grocery storeups,
you're like, I'm just gonna have somebody bring it to me.
And then then when I do that, I'll usually have
to bring bring me enough that I can eat for
the next two days. Like the other day, I ordered subway,
and I ordered like a foot long sub and then
I ordered one of their like bowls that had like
basically it's a sid essentially, but like one of their

(51:01):
large salads with their sub materials all in there too.
So between the two of those, they ate half the
sub for lunch, half for dinner, and then they ate
the salad for lunch the next day. And I was like,
you know that seems to work out okay too.

Speaker 1 (51:13):
But you didn't go get groceries in the meantime and
prepare yourself.

Speaker 3 (51:18):
For the next time, you're still terribly see's.

Speaker 1 (51:22):
I feel like that's that's a guy problem, like what
what is? What is not computing where you're thinking at
least two days ahead so you're not fucked by the
next time you need to eat.

Speaker 3 (51:33):
Yeah, I'll figure it out when it happens, you know.

Speaker 1 (51:37):
But then you're starving and not thinking rationally, and then
you spent and I'm coming from again a money saving element.
Then you end up spending way more money on food
because of the convenience element because you're starving than just
if you would have had something on hand.

Speaker 3 (51:50):
It's true, I don't have an argument for that. But
I also don't want to go to the grocery store.
I hate the grocery store. So it's it's terrible here.
I mean, and I'm and I guess the thing is
the cost. I can do Instacart and pay somebody else
to shop for me, but I feel like they never
always they never get all the stuff that I actually
want them to get.

Speaker 1 (52:09):
I can't trust that either.

Speaker 3 (52:10):
It's always like you was what I wanted to. I
wanted a cucumber. I was like, I just needed a
cucumber as part of everything else that I wanted. And
they're like, there's no cucumbers and I was like I
don't believe you. Can you please go ask somebody? And
then finally like, oh, yeah, I found them. And I
was like, yeah, of course you found them. I can
guarantee you the Yeah, you just somehow did not cannot

(52:31):
find the cucumbers. That was an obnoxious woman.

Speaker 1 (52:34):
I thought you got that terrible.

Speaker 3 (52:40):
So so yeah, it's interesting, And now what do you
think about things like the meal, the meal prep plan meal,
things like I don't want to give their name because
they didn't pay us for the sponsorship, so fuck that.
Like the one you just got, the places that you
just started that right, so you just got one to.

Speaker 1 (53:01):
So I'm cooking my first one tonight.

Speaker 3 (53:03):
Oh tonight. Okay, you haven't done it yet.

Speaker 1 (53:05):
And the reason I did it was because I got
a gift card through work. This is not something I
would typically do, but I thought, hey, this would be
helpful because if we both like these two meals, we
can just keep this in our back pocket for future
meals and just go to the grocery store and already
know the things that we like. But I think it
should be fine. I mean, I didn't pick meals that
we're going to take a lot of time to prep.

(53:27):
It was like twenty thirty minutes to make the meal.
So that's fine. We'll see how it goes.

Speaker 3 (53:32):
Yeah, okay, I didn't know if you've done it yet. Sorry,
I still I was going.

Speaker 1 (53:35):
To go to night. Okay, yeah, tonight's to night for that.
But I mean I do think for couples that are
struggling with planning and thinking ahead on meals, that could
probably be really helpful. Because the stuff has been in
my fridge for two days now, and I'm like, oh, okay,
and I have a plan for Tuesday, and I have
a plan for Wednesday. That's great. I don't have to
think about it. I'll just pull up the recipe card

(53:57):
and get to it.

Speaker 3 (53:58):
Yeah, yeah, that's not bad. I think. So. I think
like my dad was like he always expected meals, you know,
he always expected dinner. And my mother worked more than
he did, so a lot of times it was like
she would like have dishes for me to put in
the micro or for me to heat up in the
oven and or put the micro they were already. But
when she did come home, she liked cooking meals, but
she also was like okay with like throwing together a
quick thing a spaghetti or something like that, you know,

(54:21):
but my dad still expected it. And I realized that
when I was there and taking care of them, that
dinner was such a big deal. So what do you
want for dinner? Like? And I would ask, usually like
a couple hours before, and then I would literally go
to the grocer store like and then go to their
house and cook. So I'd go buy the groceries for
that whatever meal and then go to their house, which
was really handy and really convenient. And you know, if
you don't have a job, it's great to be able

(54:41):
to do that. Just be like get three in the afternoon,
go grocery shop and pick out some nice fresh things
that you're going to cook, and then bring it to
the house and cook it and clean it all. And
you know, so from three to seven to thirty or
you know, you just took a half your day because
you know, cooking a fresh meal, right like and so yeah, yeah,
so like it's great. Yeah, So I was, I was,
I was glad I was able to do that for
them and that at that point, but it was also

(55:03):
I got I got it annoying after you know, I
didn't like doing it more than maybe three meals a week.
You know. The other meals is like we're doing leftovers
or I want to go pick up food, or I'm
doing a homemade pizza and just throwing you know, shit
like that. But my dad, yeah, like.

Speaker 1 (55:15):
People buy frozen food and just heat it up because
I'm like, I don't want to fucking touch another thing
and mix an ingredient. I'm done, he liked.

Speaker 2 (55:22):
He liked to.

Speaker 3 (55:23):
I was like, well, is there's no vege with this
or whatever, like or no salad or something. I was
like that, like you know you just yeah, your your potato,
Like I gave you a you know, a potato with
a steak, Like is that not enough? And he's like, well,
I just thought we'd have some salad or someone with it.
Can you can you whip can you whip one up
real quick?

Speaker 1 (55:38):
Like legitimately, oh my god, what are you shot?

Speaker 3 (55:41):
Yeah, I know it's funny, So yeah, I do think
it is. It is a it's weirdly like a male
thing that I never really thought about before, Like, and
I don't know that I don't know the rationale behind
it or what you do about it.

Speaker 1 (55:54):
Like I'm trying to think, does your dad like to cook? No? Okay,
so I'm trying to think about the men who do.

Speaker 3 (56:01):
Like I like relationship, and if I was in a
relationship with someone who lived with me, I would enjoy
cooking occasionally. But it's also I don't like to cook
that much for me, but I do like, oh, let
me just whip something up because this I'm in the
mood to cook, not because it's like, yeah, I'm not
gonna cook because it's dinner time and we need to cook,
you know, Like I don't know.

Speaker 1 (56:20):
I'm only in the mood to cook two times a week,
maybe three times max of seven days. Like, it's not
that leaves a huge gap for we got to fill
the meals in for when he cooks and then when
we go out and spend money on food, and that's
not including lunches, you know.

Speaker 3 (56:37):
Yeah, it's just so here's the other I don't know.
I don't know. Here's something else. It's funny though, at
when I had my house and I had the girls
living with me, so I had, you know, four people
living there, and it was I was the only guy.
I would a lot of times, a lot of times
I would I would be like, I'm gonna cook dinner
and for myself, but I'm like, who wants dinner? And
They'll all be like, oh, I want dinner. Like the
would all be very excited to have an actual meal cooked,
because none of them cooked for themselves whatsoever in any capacity.

(57:01):
So like I would make a casse role or I
would make you know, I'd grow some steaks, or i'd
roll make burgers or whatever chicken, you know, And it
would always I'd always make extra so that they could
eat an actual meal, and there were usually were vegetables
and things with it, because I was making enough for
so many people that you needed to have maybe had
four or five people. And that is kind of funny
that that like Accordney, I would like she would just

(57:21):
be like she would literally do like a shred of
cheese or something like that, some you know, some terrible thing,
and she would bring home a cake from the grocery
store and eat like half of a cake for dinner.
But if I was eating, if I was cooking, then
she would eat what I was cooking, so like she
wanted to put as little effort into dinner as possible,
and uh, and I only did it because I was like,
I'm kind of in the mood to eat this, and

(57:41):
so I'm going to cook it just because this is
what I feel like eating right now, not because it's
like this is dinner, but this is what you have,
you know. Just that was just those were not the
same thing.

Speaker 2 (57:51):
Mm hmm.

Speaker 1 (57:53):
Yeah. I just think nobody unless you really I have
a friend who really really he loves cooking and will
make a big meal for himself. He lives alone every
single night. He will dirty up all these dishes and
do all these great things with his cooking because that's
a hobby for him. But if that's not you, and

(58:14):
you're like I kind of enjoyed or whatever, if someone
else is cooking for you or you don't have to
think about it, I think you would you would prefer
that option over having to cook. Everybody would, male or female. Yeah,
Because why the fuck do I want to spend extra
energy after working from nine to five to waste two

(58:34):
maybe three hours if I have to go and run
and get groceries and everything else to make one fucking
meal that maybe I can have leftovers for you tomorrow
for lunch at work. Yeah, it's dumb.

Speaker 3 (58:47):
Have you said that? Australian chef the guy and his
clips are always like, hey, babe, what do you want
for lunch? And then she'll like mentioned something and then
he so he's a chef, so he's made his you know,
his money from doing this. But like he'll just you'll
show him choping everything up, making anything. But like everything
he makes is like from scratch, you know, whatever it is.
She's just like he makes Yeah, and he makes some
great looking meals. But every time I watch him, like,

(59:08):
fucking lunch, why are you doing that? Like why are
you putting in the effort to do that? Like, dude,
that's so many growth, so many dishes right now just
for lunch, Like fuck that.

Speaker 1 (59:18):
Yeah, well, let's take a quick break and then well
we'll give our final thoughts.

Speaker 3 (59:23):
Okay, on time, coming back for final thoughts after this break.

Speaker 1 (59:27):
Final thoughts. So we've talked about the problems of just
being a human and having a features. If you are
in a relation, food must have food. If you're in
a relationship or you're living with a group of people,
and you're trying to plan meals and make it a
better system. What are ways to make it better? One

(59:49):
thing that came to mind for me is how my
brother and his wife do meals at their house that
I think is actually really effective. And on Sunday they
get together. They spend Sunday morning or Sunday before they
go to the grocery store and they write down all
of the things they want to eat throughout the week,
Like Monday night, we're having this for a meal. Tuesday night,

(01:00:11):
we're doing this Wednesday. We'll figure it out because we
have other things going on. And she has a board
in her house and it's just the two of them.
They do not have kids. Of here's our planned meals
for the week. And it's kind of like the men.
It's set up as like a chef menu type of thing,
and then they're in agreement and they're assigned to their
meals and it's all purchased on that Sunday before and planning,

(01:00:32):
but seeing it actually laid out is like, this is
what we're doing. We could switch, you know, Monday and
Thursday or whatever depending on our mood, but this is
the plan and it's out in front of us, and
they just discuss it weekly of what they're going to do.
There isn't like a what are we doing for dinner?
It's it's known, we've discussed it, we've set up you know. Yeah,

(01:00:57):
but it prevents, it prevents the fuckery of two hours
hours before you're going to be hungry, going what's for
dinner and then just pulling together.

Speaker 3 (01:01:03):
I don't know what I wanted to do all the
week long, Like I don't you know, Like I've tried
with those meal plans and like sometimes I've been like
I don't want to eat this, and I like push
off the last minute because I didn't I don't know
why I ordered it in the first place, or like
I don't know. There's just sometimes I'm like, yeah, I'm
not in the mood for any of those types of
foods right now. I'm in the mood for pizza or something.
So I don't know. It's that's the hard part for me.

Speaker 1 (01:01:25):
Well, I think too, if you're doing what I'm what
I'm thinking works pretty well, you're buying ingredients that could
work for two or three different meals and spreading those across.
So you're doing a pasta if you're doing pasta. You're
doing a pasta maybe on Monday and on Friday, but
there are two different types of pasta things with different proteins,
different sauces or whatever. And then you're buying chicken, and

(01:01:49):
the chicken is used for the meal on Wednesday and Monday.
So you're buying, you know, things that will kind of
spread across or can make makeshift meals if you're not
feeling any of those things, but just buying baseline ingredients
that you can easily turn into at least two meals,
right right, Yeah, I mean I guess again, but that

(01:02:10):
goes with plan.

Speaker 3 (01:02:11):
I have to actually a plan. Yeah, that does make sense.
I just I really think for me sometimes and like
I literally will change in my mind about what I
want to eat four times before I actually eat it.
You know, if I go out to a restaurant, if
I sometimes I'll be like I don't know, I'm like
what do I want? And I'll drive around I just
idly like trying to figure it out.

Speaker 1 (01:02:29):
That's crazy to me, because you're the person who said
I don't care about food. I'll just take a picture.

Speaker 3 (01:02:35):
Sometimes I'm just like yeah, but nothing sounds good. So
I'm like, I don't want to eat anything, so but
I know I need something, so like I have to
drive until something looks appealing because sometimes I'm just like
I really don't want to eat anything, Like I just
I have to eat. Sometimes I'll just drink and then
you know, then go to Taco Bell and the two
in the morning instead that I woul doing that recently.
You know, that's that's a great dinner in the morning. Yeah,

(01:02:57):
these new little that's for me.

Speaker 1 (01:02:59):
That's a third.

Speaker 3 (01:03:02):
Have these little Chilupa street tacos now that are like
the street taco side, so they're only like half the
size of normal tacos and then they're like they're fried
with cheese like so they're they're so fucking good.

Speaker 1 (01:03:14):
It's my new thing anyways, But that doesn't solve this problem.
And I don't know if we can solve this problem, honestly,
And I think more people struggle with this we are
aware about, you know, just because it's the unsung daily
battle that you're just trudging through, like just trying to

(01:03:38):
get through the evening to go to sleep for the
next day.

Speaker 3 (01:03:41):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't know. I think I mean,
I think planning does make sense. That is the smart
thing to do. It's just like planning for if you
share a household, household with any sure a household, sorry,
if you share a household with anyone, there's going to
be planning about everything about who does the chores, whose
job it is to do X, Y and z, like,
those are all things that require planning, and meals should
be an aspect of that. Finances are planning, you know,

(01:04:04):
like when you share house with with somebody, there's a
lot of that. When you're single, obviously you have the
burden of everything, so you don't you can get by
without planning anything because it's just you.

Speaker 1 (01:04:15):
But even when you live with people, you are supposed
to plan the finances and who handles what, But that
shit goes untalked about as well. I mean we always
talk about communication being the key. That's something where you
start off with good intentions of like, hey, let's set
a plan, Hey let's talk about this on a monthly
basis and get you know, how are we doing, and
just get a pulse on things, and that shit just

(01:04:36):
falls by the wayside so fast. Yeah, when life happens
and when people are working extra hours at work or
focusing on other things going on in their family life
or whatever the case may be, that that goes away
and you don't unless something is in a dire situation
where you're at the breaking point of fighting about it.
You're not going to just bring it up casually of like, hey,

(01:04:58):
let's go back to setting a plan because we stopped
doing that randomly and you know.

Speaker 3 (01:05:06):
Yeah, the only other solution too, that I can think of,
is to to just get rich enough that you can
have a personal chef.

Speaker 1 (01:05:13):
Okay, well that's not going to be an option for myself,
you or most of our listeners, but thanks for the
get rich, never cook again.

Speaker 3 (01:05:23):
That's right exactly.

Speaker 1 (01:05:25):
I would love that.

Speaker 3 (01:05:27):
Have you seen the of the of the girl who's
talking about her personal chef or her client and her
she's her client, so she she talks about she's like
today today my client wanted blah blah blah, I wanted
to do it. So like I made that bitch some
food and she she like she's chopping, she's making like
decent looking meals. They look really cool, and then like
she's nibbling on them as it goes and everything like that,
and then you finally like even the even though I've

(01:05:48):
seen a couple of times every now and then, and
every then I got fooled until the end when she
shows her sitting down and eating it, that she's her
own client, that she's her personal chef, and but there
it's pretty fun funny concept. And I think that's the
other dude, is if you make food, that's what you do.
You turn it into a until, into an influencer thing.
You turn cooking into weekly, weekly, weekly meals with Sarah

(01:06:08):
and Roy. That's gonna be our new podcast, new podcast.

Speaker 1 (01:06:15):
No, no, you know, And I do think that obviously,
if you're with a partner who's like the expectation is
for you to cook and dada da, you're probably with
someone who doesn't respect you your degree. That's kind of
been unspoken this entire episode. But if there's not a
shared responsibility around cooking, cleaning and household chores, yeah, and

(01:06:38):
there's there's obviously an issue there where you can't go
on forever and not address that problem. So you might
either need to rectify the situation by having a huge
conversation about it or going, m we're not working out
just you and me and I I can't just take
the burden of everything just because I am a woman

(01:07:00):
and you expect me to mommy you and make sure
the house is clean and your laundry is clean and
all your life is put together because that's not my job.
And also I can't help, but wonder how did these
men who look put together now that they're in a
relationship function pre relationship. I'm sure their lives got significantly better,
just like how men's lives typically get better once they

(01:07:22):
get married because the wife picks up all of the
household shit, where the girlfriends are doing wife duties for
free and picking up all of his shit that he
doesn't do. And if he was single, that would all
fall apart and he would be having boy dinner or
whatever the fuck he can find in the fridge or
or nothing air pulp food, sleep.

Speaker 3 (01:07:43):
At the bar basically is what it is. He just
eat dinner at the bar. Yeah, yeah, no, I think that. Yeah,
there's just the yeah we have to that's definitely, you know,
worthwhile that if it is something that someone expects of
you that's not healthy at all, and yeah you should
definitely focus on that. But if it's something where it's
just a weird kind of subconscious need for like dinner

(01:08:03):
to be to be a thing and let's have good food. Yeah,
then yes, exactly. Then it's like man hungry, need good food?
Then yes. Then maybe at that point it's like, okay, well,
how do we make this so it's not an undue
burden on the woman to provide that or to plan it,
but it becomes something that you both like to plan

(01:08:24):
or or figure that out. I don't know.

Speaker 1 (01:08:27):
Again, no one really likes to do it. I don't
think unless you're a chef.

Speaker 3 (01:08:30):
Yeah, and even a chef, you imagine if they if
they chef all day long, they don't want to come
home and fucking cook, you know, they like, they probably
don't want to do that either. So yeah, I don't know,
but I still support girl dinner and I think we
should just make girl dinner a thing. If I was president,
that would be mandated girl dinner forever.

Speaker 1 (01:08:49):
Girl Dinner's never going away. Let's be real, it will.
Girl dinner will live on whether the trend dies. It
has kind of died already, but it is a trend forever.

Speaker 3 (01:08:58):
Well, I'm saying said when I was when I was married,
we were doing girl dinner. So it has been around
for many, many years.

Speaker 1 (01:09:03):
It's not going anywhere, you're right, Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:09:06):
Well I'd love to hear what people have to say
about their dinner needs right and their dinner thoughts.

Speaker 1 (01:09:13):
Or their problems with living with someone and the shared
responsibility of making meals and if they're struggling with my
daily struggle, weekly struggle. I don't know.

Speaker 3 (01:09:25):
Absolutely, yeah, so yeah, let's let's let's hear about it.
You call our hotline at four oh seven five one
nine zero one eight one and let us know your
thoughts on just on meals and dinner, like there anything
we talked about today. Would love to hear what you
think about that, plus any questions you might have about
just for the future, about anything related to relationships, society,
anything where we're open, open, open door. We're open, open, open,

(01:09:49):
but I don't know whatever. We're an open spot for
you to We're a safe place for you to ask
any question. How about that there is.

Speaker 1 (01:09:56):
You can also sound off on our Facebook group at
Facebook slash group slash dCas podcast, or you can always
email us if you wanted to be a little bit
more anonymous at Dating kind of Sucks Podcast at gmail
dot com.

Speaker 3 (01:10:09):
Yep, and if you're listening to this, you can watch
on YouTube YouTube dot com slash Dating kind of Sucks.
You can follow our instagram at dating kind of Sucks,
or Sarah's and Eyes, which is avitable and simply Sarah
g Underscore. And I'm trying to get people to follow
me on Threads and Blue Sky where I'm evitable. No, no,
I'm building up with Dread's audience here. I'm trying to
help me follow me on threads at a visible blue

(01:10:32):
sky not so much. We can still follow me there also.

Speaker 1 (01:10:35):
Oh those all the shameless plugs we have.

Speaker 3 (01:10:37):
We have tiktoks too, but like it's all right. They
can follow us adam avitable at simply Sergy on our score. Yeah.
But if you are listening and you have not yet
rated us on iTunes, it's been eight fucking years. Why
I haven't done it? Please leave us a five star
rating and review on iTunes and actually and follow us
on Spotify. When this episode comes out, there's I want
to say a ninety eight percent chance that we have

(01:10:58):
a new logo.

Speaker 1 (01:11:00):
I would say higher percent chance.

Speaker 3 (01:11:02):
On Okay, I sat, It's not gonna let me publish
the episode without us having the new logo and incorporated.
So we have a new logo. Check it out for
the dcast podcast. Yes, as we slowly transition from Dating
kind of Sucks todcas podcast, we have a new, brand
new logo that is now you'll see on your apps
or whatever. We'd love to hear what you think about
that as well.

Speaker 1 (01:11:22):
And yeah, I just don't tell us you hate it.

Speaker 3 (01:11:27):
I mean you can't if you want to, but we
really would rather not hear that type of that's negative.

Speaker 1 (01:11:31):
Yeah, we want the positive feedback at all, like.

Speaker 3 (01:11:34):
Yes, but we'll be back and uh with in a
couple of weeks, I know, with either one of these
episodes or a different type. I've got some some stuff
on the horizon, So look for that and thank you
for listening.

Speaker 1 (01:11:47):
Until next time.

Speaker 3 (01:11:50):
Whether you're.

Speaker 2 (01:11:52):
Married or praying on with singer your place, listen to
us and be getting a tender mumble of plenty of
young trying and trying and happen to bluck because we
all know.

Speaker 1 (01:12:03):
Dating kind of sucks.

Speaker 2 (01:12:11):
Sarah and Adam are Dulova kind says stupid shit and
she doesn't mind.

Speaker 3 (01:12:14):
They're not doing with this, so don't make any fuck.

Speaker 2 (01:12:16):
Life as a chicken woos, but they'sday bluck. Why does
it work, We'll hear with the Brooks. They all know.

Speaker 3 (01:12:22):
Dating kind of sucks. Dating kind of sucks.

All Episodes

Men Vs. Food - Gastronomy or Misogyny?

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

Stuff You Should Know

Dateline NBC

The Joe Rogan Experience

.css-15opob5{left:0;position:absolute;top:0.8rem;} All Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Men Vs. Food - Gastronomy or Misogyny?