Was it just a Fight or Are They Toxic?

Episode Transcript
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(00:01):
Hi, I'm Sarah and I'm Adam, meath a visible. This is DKAS
podcast podcast about dating, sex andrelationships. This week we'll be talking about
arguments. Is it a fight oris the other person just toxic? Enjoy
the show whether you're married, ourfingle or Paul right hanging on with's manufact

(00:22):
of your place listen to us andbeing a tender and mumble up plenty of
young trying and trying and having tolook because we all know dating kind of
songs. Thanks for joining us foranother episode of Dating Kuna Sucks. If
you're new to dCas, my nameis Adam and I'm a comedian, writer
and misogynist turn feminist, joined bymy co host Sarah, who is a

(00:44):
millennial travel junkie and serial dater nowin a committed relationship. We're not professionals,
doctors, or experts, just twopeople sharing our perspectives on the world
of dating, sex and relationships.The first half of every episode is spent
catching up on what's happening in ourlives, and the second half is reserved
for the episode's main topic. Soif that's all that brought you here,

(01:04):
you can skip through the halfway mark, or you can stick around and enjoy
the whole show. Let's get started. Hi, Adam A long time no
see? Oh yeah it's been Whydon't I just face time with you?
Yesterday? This morning? Today?Was it this morning? Professionally A long
time no see? Yes, professionally, I know, because you are all

(01:27):
the way in Chile right now,I am. Yeah, I'm the first
time south of the equator, sothat I guess that's kind of cool.
It's fall here, yeah okay,and so what's what's that weather? Like?
A's seventy and sunny every single day, So I'm not complaining you out.
You must love that so much morethan in Seattle right now right now?
Yes, yes, everyone, I'mhere with the group, and everyone's

(01:51):
like, what are you doing thissummer? I keep saying, I'm staying
in Seattle where it's nice. I'mnot traveling anywhere else. I'm staying home.
But they're like, no, Iunderstand that that's when it'll be nice.
But getting the travel up early thisyear. Yeah, so yeah,
so you're that's that's so crazy.I mean, it's you know, and
and I know logically it makes nosense, like it makes no sense,
but I always keep thinking that somehowthere's some other adjustment to the time zone

(02:13):
difference from being south of the equator, like like, you know, just
like somehow it should change things,and I like it should now be night
and not morning, which I thinkit you know, it's not. It's
at different time, which is it'sweird to me because you just think of
the right. I know, Iknow, I know, it's just a
it's kind of kind of odd sometimes. So h you're hanging out in Chile
um for for a while, you'rehere for them for there for a month.

(02:37):
Ye back to Seattle probably to twodating kind of sucks episodes from from
Chile. I'm I'm getting if weprobably most likely, Yeah, well that's
nice. I'm I'm not in Chile. I'm it's just actually still in your
tah just snow to eight inches overthe last day, which I mean,
I love the snow as long asI don't have to like go out in

(02:59):
it. I'm I like it.And so that's been nice. I Like,
I really thinking maybe I should justmove somewhere that just snows all the
time, as long as I don'thave to ever leave. I thought you
hated because of that. No,Vermont was nice too when it snowed.
When it was snowed, it wasamazing, like it was so quiet the
snow. Well, that's that's that'sobviously the problem. I need to make

(03:20):
a house where I don't ever haveto leave. So I just need a
house where I have everything I needor get things delivered, okay, and
everybody just come to me. That'sthat's the that's I think, that's my
new life motto is just make everybodycome to me. That's that's I'm not
I'm not going. I'm not goinganywhere anymore. I mean I already had
that. You haven't changed that mentalitysince like we met, that's always kind
of been. I'm not driving morethan five minutes for a date. That's

(03:43):
stupid, but it's true. Idon't think I thought it was stupid.
I just said that I wasn't.I didn't want to go further. I'm
not doing it. I don't understand. I understand why people would. I
just don't want to full five minutes. I know, well, I'm not
even so I even even at adate last week, last week, two
weeks ago. I don't know time. Time is a construct, does not,

(04:04):
it's not real. But I hada date and she came out to
me. She drove, drove overthrough the mountains, UM and came which
is of course the biggest issue hereand where I am, and enjoined me
at my version of ale House here, which is a bar called Melvin's Millers.
It's Melvine, yeah, it's Millers. Yeah, it's Miller's Alehouse.

(04:26):
This is Melvin's public House. UM. And so she met me there and
she was great, and we hada great conversation. And you know,
she didn't drink because she had todrive back through the mountains, so she
just was drinking like Gingerrell while weate some food and chatted, great conversation.
She was really cool. UM thoughtabout maybe trying to play in something
next time, maybe me going overthere. Even mentioned that, you know,

(04:46):
I was like, you know wehave She was like, well,
I like, I have a couch. She goes, I also have a
big king bed. You can alwaysjust crash here if you want. That
was very nice, and she sheseemed cool. But nothing. That's the
thing that there's no butts except justlike I'm I'm the butt. I guess
I just we chatted a little bitafterwards. We've we texted a couple of
times, and then I just kindof went silent, and I mean,

(05:09):
I'm sure i can reach back outany many minute now, and I'm not
going to ghost or ghost like Iwill reply. But no, we we
did. We texted back and forth, and then she had invited me to
um Saint Patty's Day, something thatshe was doing in Saint Patty's Day,
and I said no, I thinkI was just going to stay in for
Saint Patty Day. But I appreciatedit. And then I don't think I

(05:30):
heard from her since, and Ihaven't said anything back, but I I,
you know, I think she shemade it pretty clear that she likes
like she works hard during the duringthe week, like her job is like
a you know, pretty nine tofive sheep, but she's existed. Yeah,
she's just exhausted when she gets homeand she's ready just to relax.
And then her weekend she likes togo out and be social and that's what
she wants to do. And soI think that my the fact that I

(05:53):
like to just be a hermit,that's probably an issue. But yeah,
I just I just started thinking,you know, I'm only going to be
here till the end of May.And then I'm leaving and I have a
lot of things that I'm trying totrying to do in the meantime, and
I'm like, why why am Ieven trying to meet people? And it's
like meeting people though I think it'swhat it is. I enjoy meeting them,

(06:13):
like I enjoy when I get outand say hi, but then like
it's the it's like doing that thatextra stuff of meeting them a second time.
I'm like, oh cool, Imet them, like and you're great
and it would be fun to hangout again. But like that second time
I feel like just adds an extrastep of something to to the to the
dynamic. Maybe I don't even knowseriousness because it's a second you know,

(06:35):
it's a second date basically, Iknow. So I I really don't know.
I don't know what it is,but yeah, and so I I
just I've just been my normal hermitself. I was talking to somebody else
on on bumble too, and okay, just delete. What do you do?
But they're fun to meet people,like that's the that's the want to

(06:57):
because you don't want to meet asecond time, So just fucking lead him
until you leave Utah. What areyou doing. Literally just said what you
were going to do, and nowyou're still on the apps. That's done,
and I'm still in the apps.It is. It is dumb.
It's absolutely dumb. I know that. But I just, yeah, I'm
trying to figure out a balance,because every now and then I do feel
like being social. Once every threeweeks I'm like, I'm ready to go

(07:18):
meet meet some people. Well,then hit up the people that you've already
met once or twice and do that. I could do that when you were
going to go bowling with a groupof people and you said, nah,
I don't really feel like it.Where's that group of people? Yeah?
I met them actually at the brotherof the night they were actually they were
there on that night that I wasthat I was there for the date.

(07:38):
After my date left, there wasthe guy sat down and the sea where
she was and we were chatting andhe goes, oh, yeah we met
before. And I was like,yeah, you were talking about the bowling
and he goes, yeah, youdo you not come by any time?
You're welcome to join us, andblah blah blah. You know, and
you know, we always have league, We always have somebody. We need
a spot to fill in and everything. And I was like, oh,
that sounds really really cool, andno, I'm never going to go,

(08:01):
not even just to talk to them. You don't have to bowl. I
just feel so awkward. I'm toomuch of an introvert to just show up
a ball. You just but youjust fucking said. Sometimes I get normally
and I want to do but youall do that, and that's already people.
That's when I'll go sit at thebar and I'll talk to the bartender
and that's that might be the extentof my SOLI. But but I like
meeting people. And then I getin this mindset, oh yeah, I

(08:22):
could do this, and then aftera little bit, I'm like, no,
I really don't want to do this, and it said, that's what
it is. I psych myself up, and then I realized that I'm an
idiot for even drawing in the firstplace. I feel bad because I don't
want to waste people's time. Butyou know, it's yeah, it's good
for my it's good for my mymental health to meet people. I know
that. But I know also I'mgonna be hitting the road again, and

(08:43):
when I'm on the road, I'mnot going to be meeting anybody really like
it's because it's not really worth it. So I'll be seeing people I already
know, like when I obviously I'mgonna come up to the Pacific Northwest,
I'm gonna see you. I'm goingto see friends that I have out there,
and uh, you know, andI'll see them, but I'm not
going to try to meet new people, because what's the what's the point.
What's the fucking point? Okay,there is the whole conversation just fun around

(09:11):
and yeah, yeah, so that'smy life right now. Cool, Well,
I guess you can go on.So it's so funny. So sometimes
like on TikTok or something, someonewill be like that, you know that
I really like your videos, youknow. Um. Then they'll say something
like, um, are you single, and I will probably be like yes,

(09:31):
but of my own design. Andthere's you know, there's a reason
like wow, I would totally datesomeone like you, and I'm like,
no, you wouldn't because I wouldjust be a hermit. Like that's the
thing. And like the person Italked to, h I'm sure she would
love to go out and you know, probably go out every weekend. But
here I might might say if shewants to go out something, not this
coming weekend, but me the weekendafter, because that might be when I'm
ready to like make the effort again. And you know, so if she's

(09:54):
okay with every six weeks as youknow, meeting up, then then maybe
you know the that's fine. ButI just otherwise, yeah, I know,
I know that. So yeah,it's just it's funny that sometimes people
ask me that I would say thatI'm TikTok and everything, and I'm like,
yeah, no, I'm like,yeah, I'm not. I'm not
toxic in those ways. But thenyou come to like my my social ability,

(10:16):
and unless unless you're willing to justto move in here and you know,
and hang out here all the time, then then I we're not going
to be incompatible at all. Soyeah, there we go, poor Adam.
But not because you do it toyourself. I dude to myself.
Yeah, I know it's my ownfault. I know that, and I'm
well aware. So oh God,when we last left you and I was

(10:43):
wrong, I eventually yes, yes, So I want to appreciate what I
do. Appreciate that. Um,yeah, we you were about to head
to a bachelor party in Austin,Texas and where you were going to be
the oldest, and you were alreadykind of worried about that because you didn't
want to drink a lot and youdidn't like you you know, you're not

(11:05):
in that bachelorette party kind of mentality. But you're like, no, it'll
it'll be good. So yeah,other than saying I was right, why
don't you tell us how? Okay? So I listened back to that part
of the episode earlier today and Ijust want to say I was invited to
the bachelotte party, obviously by afamily member, and with the preface of

(11:26):
you could be with the group,you don't have to join if you don't
want to for certain things like you'refree to move around as as you please.
And I've listened to other people goon bachelotte parties and it's anything the
bride wants to do or die,like, there's no other options for things
you could do. It's only it'syour job to make sure the bride is
happy. Twenty four to seven.That is the plan. So when I

(11:48):
got there, clearly that was notmy fucking mentality. It was have a
good time, explore Austin, havea good time, spend time with family.
That's cool. But I got thereand one of my other family members
showed up and she was like,well, I'm doing whatever she wants to
do. And I was like,oh fuck, I fuck this. Fuck.
Maybe I'm the bad Maybe I'm thebad guy here. So I was

(12:09):
like feeling like I wasn't super supportivein moments, but I also felt really
uncomfortable. So there's that, I'llthrow that out there is maybe I'm not
the best person to attend a bacheloretteparty, which is probably my last one
I'll ever attend. And previously Iattended my sister in laws and she was
super chill. She was like,do whatever the fuck you want. I

(12:31):
don't care, just show up tothis bar at this time, so she
was no plan, slow effort,and this was the opposite of that.
So typical of what I think youwill think of when they think it,
like the bachelor red event, right, yeah, my bad. So yes,
I was the oldest of the group, which that's fine. Whatever,
they're going to drink harder than me. Whatever. When I arrived, I

(12:52):
arrived. I flew in a redeye, so I napped when I got
there because I arrived at six inthe morning or something like that, nap
and then I met everyone up forbreakfast and we went shopping or whatever,
and I met two of the therewere seven of us total on the trips.
I met two of her friends andeverything was fine. And that night
it was pajama knight and play gamesand wait for everyone to arrive and have

(13:16):
pizza. And that's when I startedto see divides and oh, interesting,
interesting someone would say that, andI'm not going to name anyone, but
I'll say there was one individual onthe trip. She was a teacher,
So I'm just going to call herthe teacher who I just did not fucking
like. And I was trying tothat bitual, okay, but that bitch,

(13:43):
I just didn't like her. Andit started off really slow, and
I had to check myself up.Am I being crazy for feeling this way?
Or is she just really not thatlikable? So it started with she
was obviously a teacher, and shewas telling a story about she just got
engage, and she was like,yeah, my one student said this,
and my one student said this,and my black student said that. But

(14:05):
what her black students, but whather black student said didn't like. She
did not need to insert race intothat. So she makes that comment and
everyone just kind of nodds their head, and I'm thinking, what the fuck,
Like, what the fuck? Okay, cool, We're just I'm not
gonna say anything. So I'm I'mfucking texting You're just like, I feel
fucking crazy. Whatever. So thenlater that evening, we're playing a card

(14:26):
game and it's you're trying to collectthe most amount of cards. So some
of the cards like keep this cardif you've ever had a one night stand,
keep this card if you've ever diddada or passed the card to someone
who did dada. So I gota card that said keep this card if
you've ever eaten ass, So Ikept the card. Well, the fucking
teacher, it's like, oh mygod, you've eaten as. I was

(14:48):
like, oh my god, Iknow we're not fucking king shaming or sex
shaming anybody here in this room rightnow. Like I was just like,
oh no, we're not fucking doingthis shit. And so the rest of
the night she just kept saying stufflike, oh, because Sarah likes to
eat us, and I'm just like, oh, I'm sorry, Like,
your favorite position is fucking missionary.Shut the fuck up. Like I was
just like I was not fucking havingit with this bitch. So everything's still

(15:11):
chill, like not everyone's there yet, and everyone's also drinking heavily, and
it's Thursday night. We have tobe there till Sunday. So I'm just
drinking water and I feel like I'mgetting again could be made up in my
mind, but I feel like Iwas getting a little bit of Oh,
you're not gonna drink, Oh you'renot gonna drink, and I was like,
no, Like, I'm can drinkwater if I want. You know,
my goal is to make it throughthe weekend, not to get ship

(15:33):
based on night one, because Idid drink other nights. So there was
that. So that was the firstnight, and then drama ensued when my
I don't even Adriana, she's ashe's a family member. Her and I
we went out to get breakfast.We didn't know what time things were going
on. We just know knew thatwe needed to be at the Pedal Tavern
at noon. So we're like,perfect, we're gonna grab breakfast that we're

(15:56):
gonna go back and change and thenwe're gonna uber over to the place.
Perfect. Great, wonderful. Sochick Fila was closed at at ten thirty,
no more breakfast, so we wentto eat at another place, went
to CBS grab stuff, and weget a text like, hey, we're
leaving in fifteen minutes. It's likeeleven ten or something like that, not
even you know we had time,and I'm still in PJ. We're just

(16:18):
rocking it and Pj's just woken uptype of vibe and we're like, well,
fuck, we're not ready. Sowe rushed back to the hotel and
we noticed that they're still in theirrooms getting ready, even though they said
they were leaving in ten minutes.And as we walked past their room,
we hear the bride go well,that's so on brand for them, and
I'm just like, oh cool,Like we're talking shit, Like we heard

(16:41):
a little bit of the intro oftheir conversation, but that's what we heard,
and I was like, oh,okay, cool heard the ship being
talked. So Adrian and I arejust fucking I'm laughing. She's fucking pissed,
and I'm just like whatever, we'regonna get there on time. We
get there two minutes before we neededto fucking be there, and I walk
out of the uber and I'm justlike, I'm just gonna say fuck everything

(17:02):
to all of y'all. And I'mlike, oh my god, so on
brand of us of being late,just like dropping the phrase on brand like
it was I don't even know,just saying it so like just every every
other words, just oh, that'sso on brand. Oh that's so on
brand. And the vibe just Imean, I'm the bad guy right like,
I'm just like, fuck this shitwhatever, I am the bad guy

(17:25):
basically ruin the rest of the daybecause that was just the drama of every
bar we stopped up for the PedalTavern, Like my cousin was like,
oh, why couldn't you just checkyour email and make sure you were on
time? And I was like,is this the fucking hill we're gonna die
on? We were on time andyou guys were talking shit about us and
we heard you, so how abouteveryone just shut the fuck up and just

(17:45):
drink? But it was just likesoft spoken drama instead of just dealing with
a head on I'm like, bitch, just throw hands if you're mad,
don't don't be like, oh,everything's fine and then talk shit behind my
back. I don't fucking play thatgame, like, I'm grown. If
you have a problem, say itto my fucking face, like, let's
score up, bitch. So clearlyand throughout all of this I'm getting I'm

(18:06):
getting text commentary. By the wayof all of this, I'm just like
this fucking bitch over here. Theysaid eating nas again over here, So
I'm just like, uh, oh, so that was that? Was that?
Um? Never doing that again?Right? So now I remember that
there was one that was this theteacher, the one who told a guy
that he should eat her pussy.Fuck. I don't even remember. Oh

(18:30):
that was the that was the Maidof Honor. She she was hot and
cold, Yeah she was. Shegot shit faced the entire time. If
we couldn't find her, we justknew she was vomiting somewhere, which,
oh my god, not a goodlook in my opinion, but who's to
judge. Um, But yeah,she was because she was the youngest and
she's I mean, there were acouple of other single girls, but she

(18:52):
was trying to navigate the crowd,get drinks for free, do all of
that. And so was the teachertoo. Oh good story about the teacher.
First night, the teachers like we'reall getting free shots. I never
I never pay for drinks. AndI'm like, okay, honey, like
you're not. I'm gonna be mean, you're not that fucking cute, but
okay, you never pay for drinks, that's cool. So she's like,
yeah, we're not paying for drinkshere. So she starts handing out these

(19:15):
shots and she's like, well,the bartenders giving us these shots for free.
And I was like I don't fuckingwant, Like I'm not drinking tonight,
I don't fucking want your drink.So she's like, okay, let's
all take shots. So I liketake a step. I'm like not interested,
And five minutes later, the bartenderwas like, yeah, you have
to pay for those I'm not givingyou those shots for free. So she
got hit with like a bill ofeighty dollars and she was mad as fun.

(19:37):
So she turns to like our groupand she says, oh, don't
worry, like Sarah will get thenext round at the next bar. And
I was like the fuck, I'mthe fuck I'm not doing that. I
don't buy rounds of shots for peoplein a normal occasion, Like no,
like you play stupid games, winfucking stupid prizes. I'm sorry you thought
you were getting something for free.So she was mad the whole time,
and it just translated like everything else. It was like when we had to

(20:00):
split the bill. When it wasanything like that, I always got cheated
and she always ended up like countingthings down to the penny to make it
work for her. And I wasjust like, no, fuck this shit.
You know, I'll venmo you thatwrite him out, But don't try
to say I need to pay thirtydollars more than what I actually spent on,
so I'm not doing this shit again. Well you were. You were
mad too, especially because you weren'tdrinking as much, and so you'd go

(20:22):
to dinner and you might not evenhave a drink, or you might have
one, and everyone else has acouple of rounds, and then it comes
out to split the bill, andthey're like, let's just split it evenly.
Yeah, I'm like, I didn'thave two fifteen dollars fucking cocktails.
I had a water and an appetizer, Like the fuck. So, yeah,
there was one meal. I didn'tknow what to do. It was
actually the first bill we fully split. I didn't know what to do,
so I ended up paying you know, thirty forty dollars more than what was

(20:45):
actually what I had spent on,and I was really fucking pissed about it,
and I was like, it's fine, like, don't cause that was
early on. I was like,don't cause any issues, just keep your
fucking mouth shut. And then thatnight at dinner, the same thing tried
to happen. I was like,I'm not doing this shit again, like,
fuck you, I'm only paying whatI spent money on. This is
ridiculous. And yeah, if youI have money to spend on stuff,

(21:10):
and I don't mind spending money onthings, but don't try to like get
the better deal when you spent moreof it. I don't know. I
just think that's that's kind of rudeand unfair in my opinion. It is,
it is, and it's one ofthose things that's I mean, especially
with the most restaurants in places toonowadays, are so easy to try to
make things, I mean, tosplit things, and it's so easy to
do that and everyone else calculators youlike, how dumb would you have to

(21:33):
be to not be able to splitthe bill properly? Too? Well,
it was the teacher who couldn't splitthe bill, and so then the joke
that for the night was I guessshe's not a math teacher. So I
was just a cunt the whole trip. And that's fine. Did you actually
ever say that publicly? Because Itexted you that, that's so good?
I did say that publicly to goodpeople, and I was like, that
joke fucking landed. Obviously I didn'tsay it to her, but yeah,

(21:55):
I was pretty I wish you hadsaid it to her. That would have
been fantastic. I mean, Iguess I guess you're not a math teacher.
Are you like just that that wouldhave been That would be those great
I was. I was proud ofthat one when it was a good one.
I'm like sitting here like texting youthings to say. I'm like,
oh, call her this, tellher this, Like yeah, so you
managed, you managed to survive.So but but yeah, so not doing

(22:21):
a bachelorette party again. I thinkthat's my my last one. I can't
see myself going on another one likethat ever in my life. Yeah.
Yeah. Do you think it's becauseeveryone was in their twenties that that mcconna
was the reason, or do youthink it was just the mindset of a
bunch of like Florida Republicans, bothboth both. Yeah, yeah, it

(22:45):
was interesting, you know that firstnight. I mean, I can talk
you and I disagree on the lineof if you vote Republican or whatever,
but I can talk pretty openly andhave strong conversations with family members who did
vote for Donald Trump and who doswing more not super to the far far
right, but more in between,but moderate. And we actually had some

(23:07):
pretty good conversations. But then Irealized, oh, no, your audience
know where you are. Some peoplemight feel more one way than the others.
And then I kind of shut upafter that. But we were talking
about just banning books and abortion andyou know, the same old things that
the fun topics of a bachelorette partylove to talk about. Hey, if
you can present on this trip,are you going to have an apartment?

(23:30):
I don't know, so yeah,yeah, okay, So does that mean
you won't have a bachelotte party ifyou ever get married? No, I
said, if I ever have aIf I ever get married and want to
have a bachelotte party thing, I'mjust going to spend the day at the
SPA with two three other people.Max. Yeah, sit by a pool,

(23:52):
drink some champagne or mimosas, andthen go through three or four spa
treatments and it's going to be aone day thing, you know. Nothing.
Something wild speaking of getting married too, was that you were part of
our last episode a couple when itwas like three four episodes ago about marriage,
talked about about about marriage, aboutyou and Roy and everything and things

(24:14):
that you were going to be facingwhen you went to Florida for the wedding,
which was what this bachelorette party wasfor. Any news on that front
about me about going to the wedding, Oh yeah, no, I'm not
going to the I've ruined everything.Let's let's be real. You didn't ruin
everything. No, But I justfeel like my relationship with my family members
after that bachelotte party is a littlebit on edge. And I might have

(24:37):
just like dropped several bombs into thewater and they all just exploded at the
same time type of vibe. Sothere's that. And then also I owe
the i r s a lot ofmoney, Like terrible timing to be in
another country on a trip, butI started doing my taxes before I left

(24:59):
to realize I owe the irs abouteight thousand dollars because of a someone put
that I was exempt for paying federaltaxes and I am not. I didn't
put that though someone else saw myw ford clicked the wrong button on the
back end. But oh wow,and uh so no, I you know,
Uncle Sam some money. So yeah, I won't be going to the

(25:21):
wedding in Florida, and I'll justbe staying home with Roy instead. So
no one will be asking me whenI'll be getting married because I won't be
going. That's right. So well, you know, I look at that
things resolve themselves. Yeah, youknow, the bachelorette party has, you
know, at least you get tosee your cousin, even if like adding,
no, I'm talking shit right now, things did not go well during

(25:42):
that trip. And then I justsaid, nah, fuck it, I'm
not going to this fucking wedding.I mean, I don't know, I
feel like that looks a certain looksand sounds a certain way. Yeah,
I'm a count. That's it.That's it. That's what. I don't
think you're as bad as it isyou think you are. But I don't
know. I refuse to go toweddings anyway. So it doesn't matter unless
I'm the one officiating and I'm notgoing. After the team went on at

(26:04):
the beginning, no one is surprisedby that tantro not even going out on
a date. Yeah, well thenof course I'm not gonna go to a
fucking wedding. Yeah, that's true. Weddings are stupid. I mean,
you know, they just generally areand just a waste of waste of time
and effort, you know, soI really just send a gift and not
go. Yeah, but seeing peopleis nice. Who that's a great family

(26:26):
members that I haven't seen the time, my grandpa who's ninety three, and
I feel like you saw your grandpayear ago. Okay, only saw your
brother recently. Yeah, but Ionly see my Florida family members once a
year, so it just, youknow, that kind of sucks not seeing
people that often. But I guessthat's just getting older and living three thousand

(26:48):
miles away that I chose to dobecause I hate Florida. So that's what
FaceTime is for. Do you thinkno, no grand can't facet No,
my other grandparent can. But no, Well I think I think going to
the wedding would have been I mean, I can't. I can only imagine
the drama that would happen if youwent to the wedding, just because because

(27:11):
I would have thrown hands on thatteacher for one, oh yeah, like
and I just feel like it justwould have been It would have been interesting.
You would have had some fucking storiesif you had gone to the wedding.
Glad I'm not going, I guess, but yeah, thank you for
the best so positive. Sorry familywho just listened all of this and hates
me even more. Now you can'tsay anything that bad you're thinking about about

(27:33):
your own family, just about justabout that teacher. She's not related to
you, no, thank god?Yeah, say so there we go.
Fuck that teacher. I feel badfor her kindergarteners. That's all I gotta
say. Yeah, I can't imagine, like, yeah, it's to be
yeah, and she needs to maybeenhance her sex life a little bit more
too. I think it sounds like, oh oh, another thing. So

(27:55):
she had a ring pop. Weall had ring This is kind of gross,
but we all had ring pop upthat first night or whatever. And
she had a blue ring pop andI had a green winner or whatever.
I brunched the next day. Shestill had a full on blue tongue and
she's like, oh my god,how is my tongue still blue? It
was like, because you don't fuckingbrush your tongue or brush your teeth like
it was just really awkward, andI kind of looked around and everyone just

(28:18):
kind of looked back, and Iwas like, no one's gonna say anything,
but that was weird. Okay,what I was saying that she needs
to enhance her sex life and thenyou start talking about a ring pop.
My mind was going all types ofplaces and not that, but uh,
it just went there. But that'sthat's pretty nasty. So, yeah,
she sounds like a winner. ButI don't like people. You really know,
I don't like people. Story.Yeah, you don't hide it at

(28:41):
all. I can't neither do I. So I understand that. Anyways,
let's move on for being negative,all right. Well, as you know,
because last episode we asked for peopleto call into the DKs hotline.
We've got a few calls and we'dlike you to keep calling in. We
need to. We'd like to havea nice roster of calls. We can
go through that number. You cancall in right now. You can pause

(29:03):
the episode and call in and leaveus a question about about your you know,
anything related to dating, sex,relationships, travel, whatever, like
anything you just might want to talkabout. We did get one that we're
not going to air. That wasa compliment. It was just someone who
just called in to say I loveyou guys, and you know, nothing
nothing to ask, but thank youfor thank you for doing the podcast.
You know, I listened to everyepisode, so that was very nice.

(29:23):
Why does say thank you to thatone? But you can call right now
at four oh seven five one ninezero one eight one, and that is
our our voicemail line, and justleave a voicemail with your question and we
will go through them. And we'regoing through them and playing them on air
and answering them. And so ifyou haven't done one, we'd love for
you to do one. That's ournew review. If you haven't done fun

(29:47):
yet, please do it. That'sright, right. So so this one
here, it comes from from ananonymous woman who left it um and so
let's go ahead and listen to herquestion. Hey, Adam n Sarah,
So, I am a woman inmy late thirties. If matter has ever
been married, I am single andI have recently started dating a friend of

(30:07):
mine. We've been friends for abouta decade. This is the first time
that we're both single at the sametime, and after some hemming and hawing
about it, we decided that,you know what, We're gonna give this
a try. And so far,so good, except that I'm realizing how
different we are, which I knewbeforehand. But I guess it never bothered

(30:29):
me when we were just friends.For example, we have very different taste
in movies and TV shows. Wehave very different day to day schedules.
We have very different political views.He keeps his house at a freezing cold
temperature and I am always cold whenI'm over there. You know, things
that never really bothered me when wewere just friends, But now that I'm

(30:51):
looking at a potential future, I'mlike, are these deal breakers? Maybe
these are things that cannot be overcome. But at the same time, we
have great conversations We've never you know, we always talk about how we never
really run out of things to talkabout. We get along really well.
Oh, he's allergic to cats andI love cats. The idea of not
having cats in my house in thefuture makes me kind of sad, But
yeah, so I guess my overallquestion is how much do you need to

(31:15):
have in common with a partner,how much can you compromise versus how much
just needs to sort of align better. Thanks later, Well, I definitely
don't think any of the things youmentioned are actual deal breakers, Adam.
I know you're going to say politicsis probably one, but overall, it
just sounds like those are potential bumpsin the road that you'll have to talk

(31:40):
through and then find compromises to makeyour relationship just flow a little better.
And I don't think it's a problemthat you don't have a lot of things
in common either. Sometimes it's goodto be your own person, have different
interests, and then when you cometogether things are good because overall you're having
good conversation. It seems like there'smutual respect and trust. So not everything

(32:00):
has to be the same or perfectperfect. I think you learn and grow
more in a relationship when you don'talways see eye to eye on things,
but you're knowing that you were workingtoward a common goal. And yeah,
I will, I will disagree toa couple of those things, but I
mean I would say, like everythinglike you know, keeping the house cold
and you're always cold when you're withher. I think that's that's like almost

(32:21):
like a almost like a stereotype thatmen keep the house colder than women and
women are always freezing. I feellike it is. It feels like it's
just one of those things that womenare always freezing and men always have like
you know, just that they're alwayshot blooded or something, so like they
always keep the ac cooler. Idon't know, unless you're like a dad
and then you keep the ac atlike ridiculous stupid temperatures because you know,
you got to pay the electricity bill. But like, I feel like there's

(32:42):
just this thing mentality, and solike that's not really big thing. And
having different day to day schedules.I mean, that can be a little
frustrating for seeing each other, butyou're not living with each other, and
so you know, you make thetime to see each other, which is
where I think the two things thatdo sound a little bit of an issue
to me. One would be thepolitics, and that is that is important.
It wouldn't have been important five sixyears ago. I don't think it

(33:05):
would have been such a big deal, but now it's shifted to such a
degree that if you differ on politics, then you essentially are differing on human
rights and bodily autonomy and women's rightto exist. I mean, I agree
with you there, but I'm sayingyou right marginalized and oppressed groups to exist.
No, no, but I'm sayingyou could still have cover. You

(33:27):
might not see eye to eye rightnow, but you could still have intelligent
conversations about where you stand and educateone another on your point of view.
Maybe. But if someone doesn't thinkthat you should have the right to bodily
autonomy, then where is their commonground to start with? Fair? I
mean, maybe he's you know,he falls some things that are Maybe he's
a libertarian, which means he's afucking pussy. Okay, that's not helpful.

(33:52):
Won't make a fucking choice about abouthis actual political leanings. Yeah,
anyways, Yes, Liberts are worsethan Republicans in my opinion. So okay,
so that can be. It dependson the actual political you know,
on the actual political views. Butthe fact you mentioned that. But and
it's funny that even more than thatto me is having completely different tastes in

(34:14):
movies and TV shows, Like Ialmost feel like that's a bigger deal breaker
because in your limited time on thefact you have limited free time because your
schedules. It's like, you know, catching up and you know, watching
a show together or go to themovies or like or like, you know,
just snuggling on the couch and puttingsomething on is a good way to
spend time with each other when youhave limited time together. And if you

(34:36):
can't agree on, you know,what you like to watch, then that
could that could be I feel likethat for me, that would be that
would be an issue. No,it's it's saying, oh, like,
oh, I haven't seen that before, it might interest me and watching it.
It's not like they might like animeand you might not like anime,
so that's just something he won't playaround you. But there's other things that
you libertarian it likes anime, solike that just seems she's no, I

(35:04):
mean, but but she says,you have very different taste in moon movies
and TV shows, so like,apparently it's very very I can learn to
like some of those things. Oryou know, you try it out and
you say, oh, not mything, and then you find some other
things. You all go off inyour separate rooms and watch your own separate
shows and non never actually it's beentime together. I guess it's not a
red flag, Like, it's nota deal break a red flag. Yeah,
I misspoke, it's not. It'snot a deal breaker to me.

(35:27):
I think it's an opportunity to learnsomething new about that person and see,
oh, this might be something I'minterested in. At least try it out.
And if it's really not your cupof tea, then you search another
genre and find other things you mightlike. It's not Bryan, I literally
have fucking nothing in common. Wedon't like the same music. We don't
watch the same fucking shows we Ido now though. That's the thing is,
like you guys have started to likeyeah, because now we do.

(35:51):
But I had to like slowly easy, and he had to easy. There's
shit that I like that he's nevergonna like, and I accept that,
and he feels the same about certainthings. But we've ease into I'll give
it a try, you know,I'll watch a couple of episodes with you,
and if I don't know, Ithink we've learned more about each other
just from learning these different things andexperiencing different things. I mean, as

(36:13):
long as they're open minded to watchingsome of those things. Maybe like into
doing that. And yeah, thecats thing I think is a big deal
either, because like you can fuckingtake Claridon. Like, if it's really
important for you to have a catand he's allergic, he can take Claridon.
It's not you know, even mostmost people I know who have cats
are allergic. Anyways, right,yeah, yet he's fine with the cat.

(36:34):
Roy likes the cat more than youdo it, Right, So I
think people change for the better andcan learn and grow. Yeah, I
guess unless you're a libertarian anime watcher, I guess it's impression. Is that
your impression of me. We're nothaving a microphone in front of you,
so I'm like, I have allthis space to just act out like I'm
Adam. I don't know. Wellthat's the funny thing too, So you

(36:57):
know, because you're in Chilia,your internet isn't is it is, Okay,
it's but it's not like yeah,so every now and then your video
will freeze and like these really fantasticpositions like where your face is making these
crazy faces and I'm hoping it sticksthat with you for the YouTube video because
it'll be funny cool. But anyways, so that's that's how So Sarah and
I don't necessarily agree completely, butwe do agree that it's not these are

(37:20):
not you know, nice deal breakers. This is you know, without more
details, but it does sound likethis sounds like okay, sounds like dating,
and you know, you can seelater on if they're just not compatible,
you know, as you progress,but right now it sounds like it's
still okay. Um, you don'tmention anything about it if the sex is
good, and I think that's that's, you know, kind of a part
of this too. If you're havinggood sex, then a lot of that,
you know, is then that thathelps. Um, you know,

(37:43):
he's you know, he's the entryof the other things like yes, but
you don't need everything to be perfect, and it's not like you're trying to
have shit locked down in the nextsix months or whatever. It's just dating
and figuring out what you like.So I don't think you need to make
a call right now if you're happywith where you're currently at. I agree,

(38:06):
I agree, So thank you forthe call, And if you also
want to call in, you cancall in with your question at four oh
seven five one nine zero one eightone, and we are going to take
a quick break and we get back. We're going to have a segment,
of course, What to See withSarah Ge in Savannah, Georgia. This
week's What to See with Sarah Ge. As Adam said, we are exploring

(38:30):
Savannah, Georgia. It's actually oneof my favorite weekend trips, especially when
I lived in Florida. It wasabout a four hour drive from Orlando,
So you know, if you're flyingin from when I was in Nashville or
anywhere else in the East Coast,it's a really quick city to get to
and it just feels really romantic whenyou're in Savannah, just the manicured parks,
the horse drawn carriages, the cobblestonesquares. Actually considered living here myself,

(38:54):
but it's a little too small forme to live here long term.
But I think, like I said, it's the perfect getaway. Some interesting
facts about the city. It wasone of the first planned cities in the
United States with the help of JamesOglethorpe's You'll notice that the city is actually
laid out in a grid system withreally wide streets and twenty two squares located
within the grid. And from thatgrid system, a lot of locals talk

(39:16):
about Because of it, Savannah hasactually been able to avoid a lot of
destruction from hurricanes just from the layoutthe positioning of the city because it's probably
twenty minutes from Tybee Island and thebeach area there, so definitely in the
path of some hurricanes. But justfun fact there and unfortunately it is located

(39:36):
in the south and there are statueserected by the Daughters at the Confederacy that
still exists today. The most notableis the Civil War monument that displays a
Confederate soldier at the top. Soit just things to know before you visit
Savannah. It don't let those thingsstop you. Though. Let's talk about
where to stay. I think ifyou're picking anywhere in Savannah, they're all
going to be pretty solid accommodations.I've stayed downtown hotels. I've also stayed

(40:00):
at airbnbs. They're pretty similar experiencesof the hotels though. The Kessler Collection
Hotel company has a great property calledthe Mansion at Forsyth Park, which you
guessed it is right next to thenotable park that you have to visit when
you're in town, and the upscaledesign of the property and the claw Foot
tubs are definitely benefits to the room, and it's just a little fancy.

(40:21):
If you're wanting to stay around theRiverwalk area, which is surrounded by bars
and restaurants in a little bit morefoot traffic, the Hyatt Regency or the
Bohemian Hotel are great options. Nowhave your hotels stay. That's great.
Let's talk about things to do.One of the most popular things I really
like is that you can hop onand off of their trolleys, and this
just kind of helps you get abetter lay of the land, get some

(40:43):
history, and just see what youlike or what you don't like. This
is something that Roy hates to do. I don't know, do you like?
You like trolley tourists? Can youever see me on a fucking trolley?
Like I'm sorry, like Roy,I'm with Roy on this, Like
I don't understand the point of abut yeah, that's not terrible. I
think they're fun. You can getsomething out of it. You don't have

(41:04):
to walk everywhere, especially if yougo in the summertime when it's hot and
you want to go from place toplace. You don't have to walk through
everything. You could just hop onthe trolley and hop off and if you're
into ghost tours, they also havea ghost trolley tour too, so you
can check out the haunted areas ofthe city. Or you know, instead
of walking through all the cemeteries atnight, you can just hop on and
off if you get too scared,you know, maybe yeah, I've been,

(41:28):
I've been to the cemeteries, butbut yes, I'm never doing a
trolley tour, okay in my life. Well, I had to. I
had to bring it up because itis a popular thing and I think it's
fun. As far as places toeat, um, Gryfen, I think
it's called Gryfin. I always fuckit up every time I go there.
Griffin maybe it's Griffin. Probably Griffin, but it might be I'm not sure.
It's right next to scad and it'smy favorite place to eat in Savannah.

(41:52):
The building itself used to be anold pharmacy and inside is filled with
wooden bookshelves, stained glass, andan upscale seating environment. I took my
mom and my brother here for brunchand tea time and we both had separately,
and we both had an absolute blast. So make a reservation if you
don't want to wait and you wantto make a visit there. Tea time
is extremely popular and it's the perfectenvironment for tea and they they serve your

(42:15):
check in a little book too.I know that's other places do that,
but I was impressed by that thefirst time. I was like, oh,
my checks in the book. Anothergreat food option is the Collins Quarter.
It's a pretty popular spot but forgood reason. You can visit here
for breakfast, lunch, or dinner, and they have two locations in the
city. And then if you're wantingto hit up the bar scene, be

(42:37):
sure to visit Abes on Lincoln.It definitely has a divy feel, so
I think Adam will really like ithere. But why it gets the name
Abes on Lincoln, Well, it'son Lincoln, but there's a bunch of
hand drawn pictures of Abraham Lincoln pinnedup all over the bar. Through you
just grab a cocktail napkin and getto drawing on a stabe and your artwork

(42:57):
will be displayed on the bar.That's kind of cool. And then outside
of bars for me, because Iknow Adam has some recommendations, you can
honestly spend hours white walking or bikingaround the squares of Savannah, which I
highly recommend while you're wandering be sureto check out the Cathedral of John the
Baptist. It's the oldest Roman Catholicchurch in the city, and wall services

(43:19):
aren't going on, you can takea step inside to view the beautiful stained
glass windows, bronze columns, andarchways. It's actually for me. I
was like stunned when I saw itthere. It kind of I've never been
to New Orleans, but I feellike it's kind of similar to just like
the size of the big church inNew Orleans. I'm probably wrong, but
I don't know. I was justreally impressed by how high the arches were

(43:43):
and how regal it felt to checkthat out. And not too far from
that church is actually Forsyth Park,which I mentioned earlier. I also know
this is like the engagement spot ifyou want to go to Forsyth Park and
then propose in front of the fountain. I don't know if that's on your
to do list, Adam. Sothere's an engagement idea there. But of
course, if you're not there topropose to anyone on any given day,

(44:05):
you can sit down at the benches, find local art vendors filling the sidewalks
and local artists and just rest yourfeet and enjoy the fountain. It's a
and then you know the fountain duringSaint Patrick's Day. I know we just
passed Saint Patrick's Day, but Savannaactually turns all of the fountains green,
which is another cool thing. Soif you're there during that time a year,
you can see the green fountain.And then down by the riverwalk,

(44:27):
be sure to visit Savannah Bee Company. This shop offers fun products made from
local honey, but in the cornerof the store you can taste some of
their needs for around ten dollars atasting, or at least that's what it
was when I pissed it. Butthose are some of my favorite places to
visit in Savannah, Georgia. Savenit's pretty great. Been there a few
times, once with a girlfriend andthen a couple times with doing comedy,

(44:50):
and then once with a friend duringthe pandemic drink the middle of the pandemic,
we decided we had to get outof town and we went there and
so not everywhere was open, butthere's a great bar there. We did
comedy called Chucks and it was itwas fantastic, And I used to do
comedy there m all like all thetime, and I really loved it,
but then they closed, unfortunately,and that was those very sad. A

(45:12):
couple of places to stay. Iwould stay Hotel Indigo. I stayed there
right in the hard of downtown.It's like really easy to get wherever you
want to go with it was justwithin walking distance. And that's my walking
distance, not Sarah's version of walkingdistance, and so very different. Um
and I was comfortable walking wherever Iwanted to go. And then the hotel
was nice. But then I alsostayed at the High right on the river
Walk, which was incredible because riverWalk was great for just the restaurants.

(45:34):
There's a place called Hue's I thinkthat has really good food and then a
little price here but good but likedrinks wise, we went to I remember
like Bernie's Oyster House, went tothe Bayou Cafe, Warehouse, Bar and
Girl, which I'm pretty sure wasgoing on the renovations, and the place
called the Jinks, which is amusic venue and we were there during their
last couple days of opening and thenthey they're reopening a new venue, but
you should check that out. Andthen there's the the old Pink House,

(45:59):
which is probably the one more famousrestaurants in Savannah. I would say you
have to make reservations to eat there. Um. It is definitely kind of
a higher scale, a little bithigher price, but it's really good food,
fantastic food, and um, youknow, I don't even remember what
I ate, but I loved it. And I remember our set when I
was there drinking during the pandemic.Our first night, we were out till

(46:19):
four in the morning, and thenwe got up around like noon like we
need needs something, so we werelooking for somewhere. We found this place
called Molly McPherson's, which is likea Scottish bar or Irish bar, and
go in there to have a drink, and then they have they had had
a food menu, and they hadthese Scotch eggs that were like the best
Scotch eggs ever had in my entirelife. Then I will remember that,

(46:40):
like I want to go. Youdon't know what a Scotch egg is.
It's so it's like you take anegg and you I think they poach it
and then they deep fry it,and then they usually deep fry it like
two or three times. So it'slike yeah, so you like you cut
it open and it's like that,Yeah, it's it's got egg and breading,
and the breading is like usually reallyflavorful. So yeah, Scotch eggs
are incredible, but this one,like they made the best Cotchecs we've ever

(47:00):
had, and it saved us sothat we were able to keep drinking all
day so for you too, sothat was good. It was good for
the cured our hangovers. And itwas fantastic U and uh yeah, and
there's lots of cool little cemeteries andthat. I went through and took a
lot of photos in lots of coolparks as well. But I really like
the Riverwalk because Riverwalk you can justgo up and down. There's bars and
restaurants. There's a lot of touristyship like you know, like the fake

(47:22):
touristy crap of like like like almostlike Daytona Beach has where like it's like
every place that has the same massmanufactured like trinkets and things like that.
But within there there's some really coollittle shops too. And I remember there's
like a two story bookstore that's rightoff the river Walk that's really neat.
That's um just packed full of usedbooks. So if you like secondhand books,

(47:44):
you should check that out as well. Very cool. Yeah, yeah,
It's the perfect little weekend get away, especially if you've already live on
the East coast of the US andif you've been there before and you're looking
for more to do. Charleston's onlylike an hour away, and so you
can actually go to Charleston while you'rein Savannah, which is what I did
one week at and then go toyou know, go spend a little bit
of time in Charleston, have lunch, and then come back to Savannah too.

(48:06):
So like it's it's it's nice youcan kind of visit too in cool
towns and one. Yeah, wellthere we go. We just traveled to
Savannah. Yeah all right, wellhold out this part and we'll get back
to arguments. Are they toxic orjust hard to communicate with? So I
am a huge proponent of just cuttingpeople out of my life if I find

(48:30):
that they're toxic, if I feellike they don't have any value, that
all they contribute is drama or stressor just anxiety at any type of any
type of like emotional upheaval, andthey're just not worth it, that they
don't they don't provide anything that makesme want to stay, you know,
stay friends with them that I'm Ireached a point years ago where I was

(48:51):
like, I can cut those peopleout and and it saves you so much
sanity, like just just in mentalhealth to be able to do that.
So I thought it might be interestingto talk about, you know, when
do you know someone's toxic? Like, how do you how do you figure
out if you know? You getinto a discussion with a friend, um,
And this can be about relationships orfriendships, and is it something that

(49:13):
it's just a you know, justa fight. Is it just like you
know, okay, you just disagreeand everything's gonna be okay. Or is
the other person toxic and it's timeto cut them off and get them the
fuck out of your life. Sothat's kind of where this topic idea came
from. Yeah, and I thinkit's harder to know if somebody is toxic
or if it was just an argumentthe first go around and when you slowly

(49:37):
compile, hm, that fell off. I didn't like how they said that,
or this argument seems to linger onafter I thought this was resolved.
Then I think you can make thosedecisions and say Yes, that person is
toxic. I should not have themin my life anymore friendship or relationship.
Yeah, And it also depends onI think that the you know, like

(49:57):
what is the fight about and howdoes it get resolved? Who are there
times where maybe you've bet your tonguewhen there should have been a fight as
well? Yea, that can kindof help you decide if you know,
like maybe maybe this has just neverbeen a good dynamic. Now. Of
course, there are ways to knowsomeone toxic even if there's no fight.
You know, if it's just oneof those things where every time they show
up in your life they blame youfor something, they attack you or something

(50:21):
like that, obviously that person isjust a toxic person. There's no point
in even you know, you're notgetting into a fight. They're just constantly
on the attack and you're constantly onthe defensive. That's just not somebody that
you want to be around. Andthat can be family members, that can
be whatever. And I think thatwe have to learn as as as human
beings. We're kind of taught totone police ourselves and you know, accept

(50:46):
people because of X, Y andZ whatever they're well, we've always been
friends or I've known them for solong, or they're my uncle's cousin by
marriage, or we know, likewhatever, like whatever excuse we give ourselves.
Yeah, right, and and andit's okay to reach a point and
be like, no, they're justfucking toxic people and they are not worth

(51:07):
even get you know, like they'rejust not worth it. And they're gonna
say you don't have to keep themin your life. And I think that
that is a decision that when youmake, you start to feel so really
empowered about maybe some control you haveover over your life a little bit too.
I mean for me, like inan instance, it was like waking
up one day and being like,holy shit, I let all of these

(51:29):
things slide in the past because Iwas keeping up with the relationship and that
was just what the relationship was,and that was that was our normal of
comments would be said. I wouldn'tfind it to be passive aggress you know,
things like that where it's like,wow, that's not a big dealer,
Oh that wasn't really a fight.That's just kind of who they are.
And then whether it's a blowout conversationwhere you're like, oh, what

(51:52):
the fuck, how do we recover? From this, or it's you've hit
that breaking point of them doing itso many times where you're just like you
can't ignore it in anymore, andthat's when you realize, Yeah, not
a good person to be in mylife. So well, yeah, let's
actually, let's maybe a good goodthing to discuss would for each of us
maybe to talk about a time thatwe've maybe cut somebody out and like what

(52:13):
led to that? You want toYeah, I mean, I mean I
recently ended a friendship last September umand it was a friendship of fifteen plus
years, and I thought that personwould always be in my life, and
unfortunately, now looking back, Isee things that were was said about my
partner, that was said about mycharacter, just like poking fun at me,

(52:37):
like and kind of tearing me downin certain ways that I always thought
it was like fun and catchier,like endearing because they cared about me and
they were just jokes. It's notit's not that deep, it's it's it's
just all fun and games. Andthen unfortunately we had a huge blow up
fight and I like I hadn't Mybody had processed it before my mind did,

(53:00):
because as we were going through thefight, I just it's like either
fight or flight. We were arguing, and I was like, I gotta
get out of here. I gottaget out of here. And as soon
as I left, I just hita wall of tears and emotion. And
then I realized, this is thelast time I'm ever going to see this
person. We're done. Like,even though the argument just happened two seconds
ago and it could have been technicallyrecovered, I knew right then, and

(53:22):
they're like, you've had enough ofthis, like and then then it all
then all came rushing back of yeah, this, this, this, this,
and this, Like I already knewdeep down that it wasn't right,
but I just needed that one blowoutmoment to really solidify that this is over.
And whether that person sees me asa toxic person or I see them
as a toxic person, we justdidn't at the end. You know,

(53:46):
it might have started out okay ina healthy relationship, we didn't end well.
You know, the last couple ofyears of our friendship just weren't as
great as what they should have been. And that's okay. To grow and
be a different person in years downthe road, and there are people you
can grow with and learn from andlike continue that friendship or relationship. But

(54:07):
if you're making fun of that personfor growing or taking dits at them for
taking a different path and you know, doing things a little different from when
you first met them, that's asign that like maybe you shouldn't be friends
with them, you know, likeif you're constantly criticizing them or whatever.
So yeah, I just think itwas it was hard to identify at face
value that it was a toxic environmentto be in until like my eyes were

(54:31):
just open from one massive fight.Yeah, yeah, I think that's sometimes
it's what it takes. I had. I had a blogger friend years ago
that you used to used to justbe mutual friends. We would chat all
the time, just like get along, I mean very well, would see
each other. She lived in LosAngeles, so would see each other at

(54:52):
conferences. Basically would be the onlytime I'd really see each other. And
we would have a blast, Likewe would basically like just go out and
drink and hang out and just youknow, And she was always like filled
with um like all the like allthe tea on all the other bloggers and
what's going on. She was somehowshe always knew everything was going on with
everybody and uh, you know,and and she had you know, and

(55:13):
she had some harsh words for somepeople sometimes, but you know, it's
like it wasn't me, you know, and it was fine, right,
And so we'd hear her, youknow, which I would, and she
would gossip about all these people andI'd be like, oh, this is
this is great. And then sheactually was in Florida for a conference and
introduced me to Jessica, who Iended up dating. And that's when I
was dating. Um. Jessica livesin San Francisco, and so I would

(55:35):
fly to so yeah, I guessactually she lives in the Bay Area too,
didn't she not in LA? Butanyways, um, and so I
would fly to Sanrancisco and we weredoing kind of a long distance thing.
And that's when I had that periodwhere she um stopped replying to me.
And I've talked about this before whereI just I went, like my anxiety
went out through the roof and Ilike called her and left her like a
hundred messages and I was just like, please just let me know what's going

(55:58):
on, and just like you know, flipped out and everything like that,
and uh, and it had startedgetting feeling weird with this other her name
was Jenny. Uh, this personand Jenny. I remember one time I
was like, uh, they wereall going out and sending me pictures that
they were all going out in theBay Area, and I was like,
oh, have fun. I said, wish I could be there, Um,
you know whatever, and I saidsomething and uh like, um,

(56:22):
give her give her a hug forme, or give her a kiss for
me, or something like that.Give Jessica kiss the girl I was dating.
And Jenny Rebackett said that's weird.I'm not going to do that,
and just like a kind of weirdabout it. And I was like,
all right, whatever. And thenwhen this whole thing happened, all of
a sudden, like Jenny started likeit just attacked me and just like and
started like attacking me online and uhand personally like back and forth, just

(56:43):
saying you know that was you know, um just like basically like turning what
was happening, which was me havingan anxiety attack because Jessica decided she couldn't
she didn't want to reply to meinto something that was like just much worse
into like this huge, overblown thingand and started like really attacking me,
and then I found out that shewas, like I heard from all my
friends that she's like going around tellingeverybody like everything that she and I had

(57:07):
ever talked about, like all ofour like things. She basically was sharing
the same things, the same gossipingand you know, and stuff like that.
And it made me realize that ifsomeone's willing to gossip about everybody,
then they're going to gossip about you. Like if they're willing to be really
shitty about all, you know,all these people, then they're they're going
to be equally shitty about you.And they probably have been from the beginning,
you just didn't know it. Yeah, And so finally, at you

(57:28):
know, one point, I justrealized. I was like, I can't
even like be an acquaintance with thisperson anymore. Like that that last fight
was like, you know, shewasn't willing to even listen or think about
things at all, and you know, and Jessica and I made up,
like we we talked to each otherlater and Jessica apologized for everything and that
was it. But Jenny just continuedto attack me, and so I was
like, that is a that's it, that's a toxica. That is absolutely

(57:50):
toxic. And I, you know, cut her out completely and actually cut
out her entire circle of friends,like anyone that she associated with consistently.
I was like that entire group,I just I can't even be I evenna
try to be friendly to any ofthem, going to talk well and that
and like. But the thing is, and I know that each of them
probably eventually learned a lesson, Andactually I know that they did because I

(58:12):
know that jess Jessica told came backto me letter on when she apologized to
me and said, yes, shefound out that Jenny was talking shit about
her, you know, and andso like she learned too that you know,
that it was one of those thingsand she got kind of sucked into
this like just vile circle of gossipand uh, and so she eventually stopped
talking to her as well. Butyeah, I realized I just had to
cut them all out and not eveninvolved, you know, being involved in
any capacity. And it was toughbecause, you know, because all of

(58:37):
us being perpetually online, I hadto I had, you know, I
have extra accounts and stuff like that. Well I did in the fact that
I cut them out, I blockedthem like that. But every now and
then, I'd still log in andlike on my other accounts and go through
and see if they were still talkingshit about me that I didn't know about.
Yeah, because I just like,I was still trying to figure and
figure out what the fuck they weresaying about me. But it was it

(58:57):
was tough because I was also Ithink, very at that point, very
emotionally immature, and very worried about, well, what are they saying about
me? And do I have tocorrect? Like I have to correct everybody?
Let them know what the actual truthis and everything you know. And
eventually I was like, no,you know what, it doesn't matter.
People who know me know me,and people want to listen to her,
well, that's their loss, youknow. And so that was a that
was an important lesson that I learned, And but cutting her out made my

(59:20):
life so much easier. I nolonger had to worry about anything she had
to say, and I think thatmade life so much simpler. Yeah,
that's crazy too, when you say, you know what people are saying about
you or checking their social media tosee if she's mentioning you or whatever,
and it's like you're not. Youand her know the story of what happened,
and it doesn't do you any goodto like prove yourself. It's just

(59:43):
all this extra wasted energy for what. It's not going to get that friendship
back, it's not going to fixthe problem, So why be involved in
it? I think, Yeah,it's easier now being older and like more
mature about it, but like youngerin my earlier twenties, I would be
like, I want to save myname out there. I want people to
know that I'm a good person.And it's like back to what you said,

(01:00:05):
if people know me, they knowyou know, they know me,
and like if they want to listento her, that's fine. But I
do and I know what happened,and I don't care about proving to somebody
else exactly. Yeah, and soyeah, it was, it was It
was nice to kind of get ridof that. But that was an important,
you know, important choice that Imade. And uh, and I
think that kind of informed later onover the years when I realized, you

(01:00:27):
know, what's as someone's is thisfriendship or this dynamic worth preserving And you
start looking back and you're like,no, no, it's not like this
person is a toxic person. AndI think one of the ways that we
could know about this is and thisis what Jenny did to me, was,
Um, if they try to uselike anything that you've ever told like,
they try to use your your likeanything you've shared with them, anything

(01:00:49):
that's private against against you, anythingvulnerable that you've told them, anything like
that. When they use your vulnerabilitiesagainst you, that's a good sign that
they're toxic. Like um, becauselike you know, if I knew something
you know extremely personal and like whenyou and I have got into arguments we've
it's never become a thing where we'relike throwing back ship that we've talked about
that is like personal stuff, becausethat's not like that because I, at

(01:01:13):
the end of the day, Istill have respect and love for you,
you know, Like that's and sowhy would I do that like that?
That's what you do somebody that youdon't care about, That's that's you bring
up. You use somebody's vulnerabilities toattack them when you don't love you don't
love them, you don't care forthem, and you don't respect them.
That that's that's so why would yousay something that hurtful? Then you know,
yes, exactly, and so that'sa good sign of of toxicity um.

(01:01:38):
And I think is you know,in any anytime someone does that,
and I think that's what a lotof in relationships I'll see. I'll see
men post on TikTok that they're worriedabout sharing with their partner because that it's
going to be thrown back in theirface. But I think women, more
than all, more than often thanmen, have that happened where they will
share something like um, like asexual assault or something with a partner,
and then that partner will throw itback in their face. It's point like

(01:02:00):
you know, well, you know, I bet blah blah blah, and
like somehow make it their faults,blame them and like and make it into
this thing like, well, thatperson never liked you if they if they
did that, that person is nota good partner. If they're willing to
do that. What's the point ofhaving someone in your life if you're just
collecting things to use against them.That's not that's like not fucking healthy at
all for you to have the upperhand. And what because you're not going

(01:02:21):
to have a friend at the endof it. You're not going to have
that person, So why would youwant to, like if you're that person.
Why would you do that? Whatdo you gain? Right ego?
Say oh I'm better than them?I mean, fuck that, who cares
exactly. The other thing to meis like when you're arguing with someone who's
toxic. It's the same fucking conversation, just a different font. It's like,

(01:02:43):
Oh, we're gonna bring this upagain, but spend another situation around
it. Oh we're clearly we haven'tever all these apologies and things in the
past clearly weren't true, Like you, we didn't resolve it because you can't
let it go or you have tokeep bringing these issues and anytime you want
to work on something with that person, it's like, well, remember when

(01:03:05):
da da da dada, And it'slike, okay, like that was five
fucking years ago, Like why arewe bringing that up now? Like I
thought we saw that right before.No, Like why are you holding onto
things that don't make any fucking different, Like they don't matter anymore. We
should be moving forward together, notfocusing on some of the things in the
past just to tally your score upthat you're better than someone, right.
I definitely think if if someone isis in a place where they you know,

(01:03:30):
you've had passed fights and then they'vesaid they're fine and things are okay,
and you've moved on and changed fromit, like it was a you
know, whether even if it waslike you know, the you came home
too drunk that one night and petein the closet or something like that,
I don't know which. I havea friend who always get drunk and be
in the closet, Like that's whathe would do, and he and his

(01:03:50):
spouse would fight about it, youknow, and then they fight about it,
and then he's like, all right, you know what, I promise
I'll never do that again. Butthen like a couple of years later,
she brought it up again, asif it was something that like he was
still doing, and he was like, I had, you know, I
took that to heart because it reallybother you and because you care, you
know, and so I made itmade it made a change, and I
don't I've never I haven't done thatsince. And I think that when you

(01:04:11):
bring up those those old things,it's showing that you were being disingenuous about
moving on in the first place,which means that you were just you know,
you weren't recially necessarily being a good, good friend or partner at all.
Yeah, because if you have unresolvedissues, you should talk about them
until they're resolved or you know,until you can until you personally can handle
them. Yeah, but it shouldn'tbe on the other person to make sure

(01:04:33):
you're okay, you know, ifyou truly are like, yeah, I'm
good, this is fine. Wecan move on from it. Let that
be the end of it and moveon from it. M Yeah, it's
it's it's one of those things.Um. And I think that I had
a friend whose partner was flirting witha with a girl on Instagram and she

(01:04:54):
caught him and he apologized and saidhe, you know, wouldn't do it
again, but then said, youknow that she was really concerned about it
because he was kind of a fuckboy before she met him, and so
she was like, I just don'tknow if I trust. She goes,
well, I'll, you know,i'll make sure that you you know where
I am, and i'll you know, i'll be in touch with you and
stuff like that. But then everytime and he's like, that's fair because
I love you. I want youto be you know, happy, And

(01:05:15):
then every time she'd be like,oh, so what are you up to
tonight? He's like, why areyou? Why are you checking on me?
Like, and he would like getvery defensive about all of it.
And then when he he was abartender, so when he wasn't, you
know, like he would get offhis shift and then wouldn't show up back
at the place until like six inthe morning sometimes, and she'd be like,
well, where were you? Andhe would get all defensive again,
and it's like, you know,you know what, you're being toxic,

(01:05:35):
and yeah, it's fine, Yeahhe kept but he just kept getting defensive.
And that turns out he actually wascheating on her the whole time.
Um, of course, because likethat's that's how it is. But I
think that that, you know,so I think that toxic people will get
defensive. I think toxic people willget they'll turn it around on you.
They'll try to use gad, they'lltry to gaslight. You're gonna see gaslight

(01:05:57):
and you're just see manipulation. You'regonna see them using the most painful things
they can about you against you andbuilding themselves up to be the superior one,
like they're the victim that they've donenothing wrong and they're the victim,
and you should be groveling, evenif it's on them for something. You'll
never get them to actually say,you know, i'm sorry, I shouldn't

(01:06:17):
have done that. You know it'llbe This is the other thing of just
like an apology from like what Iwas explaining it like earlier, it was
like the apology I got the dayafter was I'm sorry, I'm sorry you
felt that way. I'm sorry Imade you feel that way, instead of
just i'm sorry for my actions likeinserting i'm sorry and then whatever random stuff.

(01:06:38):
Isn't always an apology, you know, like it actually has to be
sincere, and if it's not sincere, like that one wasn't like i'm sorry
I made you feel some way.I was, like, that's not taking
ownership for your actions or what happened. So you have to do that.
Like, if it's going to bean apology, it needs to be a
real apology. And if it can'tbe, then they're not They're really not

(01:06:58):
sorry, and it's it's a bandaid for what's going to continue to snowball
in the future for more toxicity.Yeah, yeah, say the whole i'm
sorry you felt that way is sucha bullshit type of you know, apology,
because it's basically saying, you know, you're you're not trying to you're
you're absolving yourself of any responsibility.And while intent does matter to a degree,

(01:07:20):
how people take things is also important. And it's important to understand that
if you know, you probably knewwhat you were saying. If if someone
actually took it in a way thathurt them, it was very unlikely that
it was. It was completely unintentionaland even but if you're genuinely sorry,
then you're not going to do itagain anyway. So you're gonna say I'm

(01:07:41):
sorry I did that, I'm sorrythat what I did shouldn't have gone that
far, should have yeah, orresulted in this. This wasn't you know,
I and I would I would neverhave done that if I had thought
about that or realize that, youknow, Like that's that's the apology,
not I'm sorry you felt that way. I'm gonna then putting the burden back
on their shoulders. It's just addicthing to say. It's like an eager
thing to say just that sentence ingeneral. Oh yeah, It's like it's

(01:08:04):
like yeah, it's like he waslike, oh, well, I'm sorry,
you had to overreact to what Isaid. You know, it's like
this very douchey thing to say.I think you'll also find that with most
toxic fights that the person what they'reactually fighting about has nothing to do with
the topic. That you'll either findout later or you'll know down in your
subconscious that it's entirely about them,that it's about something that they are defensive

(01:08:30):
about. It's about something that theyare embarrassed about, something that they are
hiding, something that they are Whateverthey're accusing you of is something they're doing.
Like it's it's always some type ofprojection or defensive action, and that's
that's toxic behavior. Yeah, usefor control, Yeah, yeah, exactly.

(01:08:50):
Yeah. I think another thing isjust like if you're not only fighting
about the same thing, but it'sconstantly screaming and crying and so much emotion
on things instead of actually having aconversation about a disagreement, and it goes
from zero to a thousand in twoseconds when one thing goes wrong and you're
like, bro, what the fuck? Like, what is why are we

(01:09:11):
getting like so heated right now?How did we get there? I think
that's a pause of going okay,Is everything okay here? Because it doesn't
seem like it. That might bea toxic situation that you're in and and
you know, and that's that's true. And I think that it's also important
to remember that sometimes toxic doesn't meanthat someone is doesn't mean like they're like

(01:09:32):
a narcissist or doesn't. It justmeans sometimes that they're just toxic emotionally,
like they're just right, they don'thave the emotional intelligence or depth to handle
things, to be a real adult, or to be in a relationship or
even a friend, a good friend, which means that if if everything every
time you try to talk to themabout it's something they get hysterical and they

(01:09:53):
go like they go in to hystericsabout it. They get they all turned
into screaming and crying and they're like, I can't even talk about this,
and they don't. If they don'thave the even emotional toolbox to work through
it on their own, that's toxicityin its own way. It doesn't you
know, it might mean that theyjust have really bad anxiety and so they
can't handle it. They can't handletalk about things, and anxiety is not

(01:10:14):
their fault, but how they howthey deal with it and how if they
let it affect other people, isthat is their responsibility. And so if
someone is so incapable of even havingan adult conversation, that can be a
toxicity of a different level. Um, and that's that's It's also okay.
You don't have to feel bad.I mean, you can feel bad for
them, but you don't have tocoddle them. You don't have to like

(01:10:36):
welcome back just because they can't emotionallybe mature enough to talk to you about
it. You can also cut themout of your out of your life,
and it will it'll solve so manyproblems in your life if you do,
y, Yeah, you'll notice thatyour life is so much better and things
will just align easier once they're gone. Like they added stress of going oh
where they're upset and they just can'teven talk about it right now, Well,

(01:10:59):
maybe I need to take a pause. It's like no, like I
handled myself with the right tone,with the right like mentally, I'm like
ready for this conversation. And whenthey spiral out of control saying they can't
talk about it or this is toomuch screaming, yelling, whatever the fuck
it may be, it's like,I'm calm about this, can have a
discussion. If you can't, thenlike we can't even have an entry communication

(01:11:21):
level here on this discussion. SoI'm just going to literally leave then because
there's no point and if you haveto pause it and then but then you
come back and they still can't doit, Like that's the thing is like,
so because maybe someone might get overlyemotional and you're like, Okay,
we'll talk about this later, andbut when it comes to later and you
try to talk about it, likedo we even have to talk about that
now? Like and like they keepbecause or they're not willing to discuss something

(01:11:46):
that is a legitimate issue, Thenthat's not that's not healthy. And so
that that's that's when you have tolike really assess whether or not that person
is worth keeping in your life.Yeah, I mean that kind of plays
into the silent treatment to a degreetoo. I mean if they're mad and
then they silent treatment you and thenthey just never bring it up again.
Yeah, I mean I don't thinkI don't think I mean it's toxicity.

(01:12:10):
I think I mean, I thinkit does mean processing U as long as
it's something that eventually gets resolved.I think that's that's part that's important because
well we all know that, well, that's what I do. And I
feel like sometimes it's it's seen aslike the immature thing to do. And
I'm not saying it's always the maturething, but it's like sometimes I just
I need to see outside of justlike my perspective and take a step back.

(01:12:30):
And that's happened so many times withlike frustrations with Roy on things,
and I'm just like I'm mad aboutthis and I can only see my point
of view and we're arguing, andI just like, you know, I'm
just like, Okay, I can'ttalk about this anymore because I have to
think, like where does he stand? And like I'm not going to get
that answer by us arguing, soI need to just leave and process,
and then, you know, hourslater, come back and say, Okay,

(01:12:54):
I had time to think about this. I can understand where you're coming
from. Here's where I'm coming andlike, actually have it a normal conversation,
an intelligent one versus like spiraling andjust like not doing anything that's helpful,
right right, I think I feellike you've gotten better about it too
over the years. I mean nowthat I realize it's I mean, it's
like a level of it is maturityfor sure, and then the other level

(01:13:16):
is like try I know that ifI say something I can't take like something
nasty, I can't take those thingsback. So it's like, well,
before I say something nasty and notunderstand how that person might be feeling,
maybe I need to take a seatand think about what I want to say,
to collect my thoughts, not inlike I'm not ready to have this
conversation, but in a like savemy ass, like not not say anything

(01:13:41):
like super hurtful just off the tipof my tongue, because that those things
can't happen. Yeah, yeah,absolutely, And I think I think the
thing that I do that's worse isI get very condescending when I get into
fights. I use my basically authoritativethat I'm already authoritative, and I just
will get extremely condescending in the waythat I approach things just because like it's

(01:14:03):
it's just such a cheap way towin an argument sometimes and I think that
that's that's something I don't do veryoften, but when when when it does
happen, that's what I'm on.I tend to do. Yeah. I
think overall, like if you're ina if it's just an argument and it's
like a healthy argument where you're notseeing side to side, there's some emotion

(01:14:24):
built in there. I think ifyou mid argument, under try to say
like, I see what you're saying, but here's why I'm at or you
you you use some language to saylike I don't fucking hate you, I
don't think you're a shitty person.We're just disagreeing on this thing. How
can we solve it together? Thenthat's normal, Like, that's normal.
Everyone's going to have arguments over littlethings here and there. But it's it's

(01:14:45):
stating like I'm not attacking your character. I'm not called like diminishing you every
word coming out of my mouth.It's like I respect you. I just
don't understand why you feel this wayright now, help me understand. That's
that's okay. Yeah. I thinkif you if you're seeing any any signs
of empathy and during the discussion fromeither side, then it's it's unlikely that

(01:15:09):
it's toxic because the person is tryingto trying to express themselves while also trying
to see your your your perspective atthe same time, and I think that's
the healthiest type of fighting that canhappen. Obviously, arguments are going to
happen no matter what they do,happen, and it's important. The most
important thing is that if you reacha point that it's about to get to
an argument, that you feel comfortableexpressing yourself, you feel safe expressing yourself,

(01:15:32):
and that you know that if whoyou're expressing yourself too is going to
take it seriously and listen. AndI think those those are the important things
that if you if you feel thatway even before you go to a fight,
that you know that you can like, hey, I need to talk
about this, and you know itmight turn into something, but you're still
comfortable and safe enough to do it, then it's not toxic. And I
think that's that's kind of like asubconscious way that to know. But if

(01:15:53):
you're terrified about bringing it up becauseof what might happen, then that's a
really good sign that it might bea toxic environment. Yeah, that's so
true. And obviously I know wedidn't say this, but anything that gets
physical, oh yeah, I meanwe didn't mention that. I think that
kind of goes without saying. ButI'll mention it. Yeah, that's that's
very true. Yeah, there's anyany type of physical violence at all,

(01:16:14):
and that's very, very, verytoxic immediately. Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Yeah. I think it's at theend of the day, it's like
easier said than done for some things. But I think over time, you
might care about that person, butnotice trends and arguments or the way that
they make you feel or subconsciously.But like you said before, you get
into an argument with that person andyou kind of gather all of that information

(01:16:36):
up and go, something's not righthere. Right, Let's let's remove myself,
remove that person or remove myself fromthe situation because it doesn't make me
feel good and I can't actually havean honest conversation with them or argument with
them. Yeah. Absolutely, Imean I think we recover that pretty can
pretty thoroughly. Anything else you wantto add to it, Cut the toxic

(01:16:58):
people out? I got nothing else. Yeah, that's right, cut them
out. Good thing, it's cut, is it? Dave? Dave?
What was that? Dave? COOLiI can't believe we just thought of the
same thing. I know that,Well, that's what it is. Full
house. Yeah, that's right.I knew I knew I knew it from
somewhere. Yeah. No, Ithink that you know that that that that's
that's really the extent of it is, if it comes down to it,
cut them out, um, andI think that's the you'll make your life

(01:17:20):
much easier. Yeah. Well,if you have a toxic situation that you're
in or want to share just anargument you had and you need help talking
through something, you can always callour DCS hotline. That number is four
zero seven five one nine zero oneeight one, and we'll always do that
in the first part of the showand kind of talk through whatever you're going

(01:17:40):
through. Yep. You can alsoemails. We've got a couple of emails
recently that we're also adding to ourqueue to talk about. And that's a
Dating kind of Sucks podcast at gmaildot com. Um. You can always
message us if you want to dM through Instagram at either our personal instagrams
or at Dating kind of Sucks UM. And then of course if you know
you want to watch, just don'tleave a comment on YouTube because our YouTube
comments are always lovely, because YouTubecommenters are scum of the scum of the

(01:18:05):
earth. You're sure, oh my, yeah, the my YouTube shorts that
I post piss off so many peoplebecause I put my tiktoks off with YouTube
shorts. And there's all these littlecrusty ass unwashed in cells who who leave
comments all the time, and uhand it's it's so great that they are
all like little little turds. Butum, yeah, you can leave positive
comments you want at YouTube dot com. Slash dating kind of sucks. And

(01:18:27):
if you want to show support toDCS podcast, you can join our Patreon
for as little as five dollars amonth. We do after each episode bonus
episodes and put fun content on there. That's Patreon dot com slash DCS podcast.
Sorry. We've been pretty good abouthaving bonus episodes at least once a
month, um, so that thatyou know you'll get at least a fun

(01:18:48):
little behind the scenes it's always kindpeople soon to enjoy them. You can
join us on TikTok as well.I'm at adam Viable, sarahs at Simply
Sarah g Underscore, and you canalso join our Facebook group where you can
get advice, talk with other peopleoffer advice. Um. That's Facebook dot
com slash Groups slash dcast podcast.Sorry, I froze, so I don't

(01:19:11):
know, I wasna I was gonnaeventually. We talked about religion the last
time. But you can just cuton that out, you can, you
can queue us out and I'll justit's fine. I don't know what you
said. So yeay Internet, YayChilean Internet. Um. But also if
you're watching this or listening to thison iTunes, we would love for you

(01:19:31):
to give us a five star ratingreview and of course follow us on Spotify
Spotify. But with that, withall that the internet, which we're just
keeping this in there by the way, with freezing like that because it doesn't
it doesn't matter. Um, it'llbe fine. But thank you for joining
us, uh and uh. Wewill be back in probably two weeks with
a brand new episode. Until nexttime, whether you're hanging on with back

(01:20:00):
at her Places, listen to husas be getting a Tinder and bubble up.
Plenty of youngs trying and trying andhaving a block because we all know
dating kind of sucks. Sarah andAdam are duobi kind, he says,
stupid chit and sheet is of mind. They're not doing this so to make
any fuck life as a chickenhoos becauseas they bluss, why does it work,

(01:20:23):
we'll hear with the cruck they bothknow dating kind of sucks. Dating
kind of sucks.

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