Women Don't Need Men Anymore - The 4B Movement - Dating Kinda Sucks

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
Hi, I'm Adam eath Vitable andI'm Sarah. This is The Decas's Podcast,
a podcast about love, sex,culture, and society. This week
we'll be discussing the four B movementand why women no longer need men enjoy
the show whether you're married, worrying, and I went to man's back of

(00:22):
your place listen to us and begetting a tender and bubble of plenty of
young trying and trying and happened tobuck because we all know dating kind of
sucks. Well, oops, weskipped March. Don't even know what happens.
I would, of course blame Sarahfor her travel schedule, but she
was only partly to blame. Icouldn't come up with a good topic.

(00:46):
We tried and just nothing was reallyhitting with either of us. And I
wasn't feeling the podcast five for amonth, so we took a break.
But here we are. We're stillhere. Did you miss us? I
hope you did. Hope everybody missedus. That's a good thing. Maybe
we're giving you too much of usand now you and now you have to
you have to miss us for alittle bit. We're like trying, you

(01:06):
know, the anxious attachment style withsure, sure, yeah, well yeah,
we are back, and there isan really interesting and exciting movement out
of out of South Korea called thefour B movement that's been around for a
few years that has inspired us toexplore a concept that should be worrying to

(01:26):
every American man with an unwashed assthat women don't need you anymore. Bro.
But before we get into that excitingtopic, we're going to catch up
on our lives since it's been aminute and give you an update on our
latest episode about Passport Bros. Becausesurprise men, passport pros and all that
jazz. But of course we wouldn'tbe here if it wasn't for you,

(01:49):
and your input always helps us somuch. So if you're listening and again
you have a question or a scenariothat you're struggling with, we want to
hear from you. Is the Yearof the Listener, Or you can call
our DKs hotline and leave a voicemailat four zero seven five one nine zero
one eight one, or you canemail us at Dating Honda Sucks Podcast at
gmail dot com if leaving a voicemailisn't really your thing, but Adam,

(02:15):
our last episode was February. Ihope we remember how to do this.
What do you have to say aboutus taking this long of a break.
I know it feels weird, Likeusually it's because oh, you're overseas for
a month, so we can't doit, do it for you know,
for thirty days because you have badinternet or something something ca So just I
don't know. I think I wastrying to do a bunch of other things,
and we like every topic, we'relike, yeah, I mean,

(02:38):
what's the point of doing something thatwe are not even going to be excited
about. We can't expect you guysto give a shit on it either,
you know, Like I would comewith an idea and starts like nah,
and then you'd come up with anidea and I was like nah, and
like we just nothing was really likegrabbing us. We were going to talk
about something not even related to likeyou know what, because we're trying to
shift beyond just datings and relationships,but but that is kind of still the

(03:01):
core of what we talk about,and because I think relationships has so much
to talk about regardless of anything else. But yeah, we just we had
a hard time with that. AndI think and and you I could tell.
Like when I was like, let'sjust take a break, You're like,
okay immediately, yes, yes,yeah, because you've got you know,
you've got your you've got an activelife. And and since coming to
Telsa, my my life has becomemore active. I know, I realized

(03:23):
that I had taken a break fromstand up before starting this podcast, and
now that I'm doing that as well, it's it is it's time consuming.
My my nights that we like torecord, I would, uh sometimes like
to be out on doing something orbe on stage, and so that's a
little bit harder to kind of coordinateboth of those things. So but here

(03:43):
we are and we have something interestingand weird to talk about, which I
think is good and uh and I'mglad to be here. Yeah. So
what else is new and Tulsa outsideof just going to more stand up making
more friends. I keep seeing allyour Instagram posts. You seem to have
a crew now in Tulsa. Yeah. Well, you know, the Tulsa
Remote community is they really try tokind of get you active, which I

(04:09):
admire, you know, I thinkthat's a good thing. And they like
they'll they always have events going on. They have like groups that they'll get
discounts to certain things and just andyou know, all types of things that'll
be like come out and try it, come out and do this. And
it's funny because back in March theywere promoting. Last weekend they were doing

(04:29):
a huge family day at the BasketballArena to watch the Harlem Globetrotters play basketball.
Okay, family Day, Yeah,Like it was like a go meet
up for lunch at a local restaurant. Everybody meet up there like basically taking
over the whole restaurant and then goover and watch. You know. They
had a whole section of the arenaset up or the stands set up for
for tultsa remote people to go watchthe game. I was like, Oh,

(04:51):
that's not bad. And tickets arelike really cheap. They're like ten
bucks each or something like that,fifteen bucks. And I was like,
Oh, that's kind of cool,you know, and I'll get a ticket
because that could be That could befun. Then as the day got closer,
I was like, what the fuckwas I thinking? Like that could
be fun? Like I like goingout with a group of families to lunch
and then going to watch a basketballgame. Like I got sucked into their

(05:13):
their bullshit is what I did.Like they they sucked me in and it
almost got me, but then Igave up my tickets. So I'm surprised
you came to your senses because Iwas questioning why you. I was like
family day. I know, Iknow, I know, I know.
I just think, like I said, they're always promoting all these things,
and I was like, oh,I should be more active, I should
do that. They also they aredoing a thing which I will do where

(05:36):
because a lot of obviously tells remoteis all remote workers, and so they
have a couple co working spaces thatyou can take advantage of that. You
have a you know, free membershiptoo that I have not stepped into once
beyond my initial orientation because I haveno desire to do that. But they're
doing like a lunch thing now wherethey you can sign up and they're breaking
people into groups of like four orfive people and then uh co bring lunch

(06:00):
like once or whatever like and it'syeah, like kind of pre lunch,
just trying to get people of differentbackgrounds to kind of chat and everything.
And I was like, you knowwhat I can do that, I'll get
I can go eat lunch that's finewith me because I can make sure it's
a day that I don't have anywork to do afterwards, and I could
just call I can call it aday after lunch, I can go out
and do whatever, you know,So that'll be my uh, you know,
my excuse the office. Yeah,I know, yeah, exactly.

(06:24):
So, so I am trying toget more involved in those things when they
are suitable for me, right,and even sometimes being fooled by them occasionally.
Yeah, So I've been doing that, And yes, I met my
uh. I have two neighbors thatI become friends with, and since we're
all in the same building, it'snice to be like, hey, you
know, we're gonna walk around thecorner to to you know, grab a

(06:45):
drink coarter, do you want tojoin us? And so that we've been
doing that occasionally, you know,a couple of times a week usually,
and that's pretty nice. It's niceto have like a little just a little
group of friends. Yeah. Andthen of course stand up. I've been
been out there doing open mics andworking on new material and that's been going
well and getting into the comedy scenepretty well. And the comedians, who
are all generally pretty pretty pretty cooland pretty supportive people, and I'm like

(07:12):
enjoying meeting a lot of them,and that's okay, you're meeting you're beating
better comedians because before you were justsaying everybody's got some kind of sex joke
or dick joke. Well, like, so that's open mic. I mean
when you go to open mic,you know there are The very first time
I went to open mic, Iwas like, okay, yes, like
I some of the comics, Iwas like, cool, they're they're terrible.
But as I've been going to more, I'm seeing the few that are

(07:33):
good, that that are that arepropping up, and I'm so, yes,
they're not all terrible, but they'rethe unfortunate things here is that there
are two open mics that are ata comedy club, that's at a two
different comedy clubs, and they arethey're kind of open to anyone who wants
to go out. I mean,they're all open mics are opened anyone,
but they promote so they're like,you know, hey, come on out,
and if you try stand up forthe first time, and so that's

(07:55):
where you get a lot of thereally really shitty ones. The beginner beginners
who shouldn't do it. Who Yeah, there's not much potential. They just
you know, they're giving it atry, and everyone everyone it works as
they're funny, so they're gonna getup and try to, you know,
be funny. And then they realize, oh, unless you work with me
or my friend, you're not gonnalaugh at me. How odd, you
know, but uh right, it'spretty funny. The other night, there's

(08:16):
this kid showing up who's been Imean, I say, okay, he's
probably just I think. I thinkhe's still in college. I don't know
if he's twenty one, I can'ttell, but he lives with his fiance
so so then maybe he is twentyone. But he looks very young.
He looks like the kid from StrangerThings, like the main okay kid,
the one that the one that tolike in the Ghostbusters movie. I always
forget his name, but it lookslike him. And he's got some good

(08:37):
material. But like Monday night,no Sunday night at open mic, he
gets up and he's doing the materialand then he does this this joke about
something something like I always ask myfiancee to to go to Starbucks and place
our order because getting to know becauseif you know you're if you know,
a Starbucks order by by heart,I think that just means you're gay.

(09:01):
I think that was his joke.Oh my god. And I was like,
that's one that's not really funny,but also is gay all of a
sudden a pejorative again in twenty twentyfour, like that, right, did
we not do that? That weI went through that when I was hurt
his age, you know twenty yearsago that you know, you use gay
as an insult, you know,that was not a thing. And then
and then we grew out of that. Uh So then when I was on

(09:22):
stage, I was telling I wastelling a bit about pranks and stuff when
I was in college, and Iwas like, you know when when you're
in college and you're just like acis head white man, you know,
like you know, the jokes youcome up with are basically things you do
are are basically you know, funnybecause you're you're do them like someone who's
not you, you know, likeyou you know, you throw like a

(09:43):
bitch or you know, like thenI was I think the ones I was
saying was like you throw, youthrow like a bit, your music taste
is gay, you kiss like agirl. You cut my balls like a
girl, you suck on my dicklike a girl like that was the joke
I was making. But anyways,but and in that and I was like,
but, you know, but thingshave changed, I said, apparently
unless you're apparently this twink over herewho thinks that being gay is somehow you

(10:05):
know, it's it's still an insult. And the Dawd loved it, like
they because they like the crowd ispretty progressive there, and they were kind
of annoyed with that joke too,And he did not look me in the
eye when he left that night,and neither get his girlfriend or fiance,
because I you know, he's likea comic who's you know better, you
know he obviously I've been around.I've been doing this for a while and

(10:26):
calling him out for having a shittyjoke. But hopefully he learns from it
because his other material is good,and I have no problem calling out shitty
material. So it's just, uh, it came out just I didn't mean
to either, just because I wason stage talking about it was easy,
easy to just to say it.So damn yeah, So I've been uh
been doing that. I even wenton a date recently to look at you,

(10:50):
I know, you know I haven't. I haven't been too active on
the on the apps. Well Iguess since we've talked, I've probably been
on two dates with two different people. Right, Yeah, So one was
we had a good time. Therewasn't really any any like chemistry beyond just
kind of someone really fun to hangout with. And we you know,
she was a day drinker, sowe started day drinking on like a Saturday,

(11:13):
and you know it, it wasquite a night. Like started at
like three pm and then I think, you know, we left it,
like we left the third bar thatwe were at it by like nine pm.
You know. It was one ofthose one of those days. This
one, this day was just someonewho is right now isn't drinking because she
has a friend who's going through sobriety. And she promised her friend that she

(11:35):
wouldn't drink for as long as herfriend didn't in a show of support.
And then she said, she toldme that she goes and I really didn't
think she would last this long.So this has been hard. But I
really didn't think my friend was gonnabe able to stay sober for this long.
But and I was like, well, do you have to stay sober?
You can't have drinks when you're notwith her, Like, how does
that affect her? Like her sobrietyif you're not with her, like it

(11:58):
doesn't matter, And she goes,yeah, you know, I'm thinking it
might be time to talk to herabout you know, some exceptions to that.
But yeah, went out to thislittle local arcade bar and just hung
out for like an hour and ahalf two hours just kind of chatting.
She was a very introverted, veryquiet and on that ass through bubble yea
through yeah, and so we andand we had a good time, good

(12:22):
conversation. Didn't end up going anywhereafter that, but it was you know,
it's nice to it's nice to getout there and just sometimes talk to
people for a little bit. Irealized that when when I don't have the
podcast and if I'm not talking toyou on the phone or out with my
neighbors, I don't talk to anybody. And sometimes like like I realized that

(12:43):
I can not trauma dumb because Idon't have trauma or really worry about but
I can just be like info dumpsometimes just because when I when I meet
somebody new, because I'm like,oh, someone to talk to that I
haven't talked to you in a while. So I had to be very careful
about that and try to keep myselffrom you know, make sure I ask
questions and everything as well than justblah blah, you know, like literally

(13:05):
there's so many things I could talkabout. So but uh, yeah,
it's been good and I think that, uh, this is what this is
April ninth, So yeah, there'sa there's not really much like I have
planned plan going on for the restof the month, except other than just
comedy, I've got a show thatI'm on at the end of the month,
and I'm trying to I said,build this hour. So I really

(13:26):
want to try to get on abunch of shows that It's my kind of
goal is to start doing shows everyweekend so I can really start working on
stretching my material and you know,just getting it from five minutes to fifteen
to twenty to thirty, you know, stuff like that. Very cool.
I'm so happy for you. Yeah, so it's so far, it's been
good. Tilsa has been been agood, good spot for for a But
I don't know how long I'll behere, I said, I said,

(13:46):
I'm giving myself two years, butyou know that that that's fine. I
think in two years I could havea really good time here. Yeah,
totally. What about you, it'suh, I mean, if you've been
busy, I yeah, yeah,I won't even say I guess yes.
Went to Las Vegas. Everybody knows, my least favorite city in the world.

(14:09):
I went for work and did notwant to go because I fucking hate
Las Vegas. And you were sooptimistic and just kept saying, it'll be
so much better, It'll be somuch better. Because I was coming at
it from a corporate conference and Idon't think it got any better because I
was so damn busy and stressed outthe entire time that I didn't again,
didn't really get to experience Vegas.I saw inside the Venetian and inside the

(14:33):
conference halls, and that was itpretty much. Yeah. Yeah, I
was. I was hoping you weregonna have some downtime and be able to
go out and explore something because ofthe things that you enjoyed doing, you
know, which is you know,explore some of the restaurants and go,
you know, you eat some coolplaces, maybe check out a couple of
the cool speakeasies, you know,things like that. Yeah, and yet
not didn't expect you to be Hecouldn't leave, Yeah, couldn't even really

(14:56):
leave the main building. So unfortunate, but you know what, better or
worse than your last experience though,it's so so I thought about that because
Roy asked me that same questions like, wish would you prefer a mental breakdown
or just a work event? Iguess I would prefer the less traumatic ones
to probably work. Let's just saythis again because because that was that was

(15:20):
Canadian John, Canadian bacon, Yeahdianbacon, titty bumps, all types of
things, yes, all types offun and uh you and tears for like
days calling my ex boyfriend just tragicship. Yeah yeah, so yeah,
it wasn't that And I'm happy,So I guess, you know, so

(15:43):
maybe next next, next time it'llbe uh, it'll be worth it.
I really do think that if youwent like on vacation, I would never
I would never go on vacation there, no, never ever, But I
feel you did go with you andRoy went and stayed in like the old
strip, and you were like chosesome cool places to go to. I
feel like you could have a goodtime there, but I'm never going to

(16:03):
do that. And let's be clear, I won't ever go back there unless
I'm forced to because of work.Yes, I know, I know.
So you made that very clear.You originally last year were saying, Hey,
should we do try to do ameetup and try to do it in
Vegas? Yeah, And now I'vecompletely changed my tune on that because I
that's never happening, because I don'tlike the idea. Because we're gonna do
like a chooser adventure where you couldlike take the Saturday and either go with

(16:26):
Adam or go with Sarah, andlike you know, and say people who
came could kind of figure out whichpath they wanted to go for the night,
for the day, drink a divebars, or go on a hike,
basically exactly what I'm saying, Yeah, go check out the Hoover Dam
and go do some nerdy shit,or or go get drunk, you know,
basically, I mean I still wantto do those things, but I
don't want to go back to Vegas, So I don't know. Yeah,

(16:47):
So you survived Vegas. Survive that, and then it was it's just been
a lot of travel and doing shitbecause right after I got home from Vegas.
I then hopped on a flight andwent to New Orleans. Roy's aunt
and uncle live there, and I'venever been to Louisiana in general, so
it was fun to just be therefor what like four or five days,
and we had a blast. Ihave no complaints except for it was just

(17:10):
already hot in March when we went. It's okay, I don't know,
like if it wasn't for climate changeand just being in a swamp. Roy
and I both said, you know, Louisiana, I don't know, even
though it's a red state. That'sthat's the other con But because we had
considered moving there because it was closerto It's only an eight hour drive from

(17:33):
Nashville, so we could still stayin the southeast, but we flipped a
coin and said let's make a bigmove. So mad you made the right
choice. I think we did.You should go back there in July first
and then be like, oh fucknow. A lot of people said that
to me when I made the commentof I was seeing houses that I could
afford, and they said, yeah, I go back in the summertime,
and already I already know I don'twant to fucking be there at that point.

(17:56):
So right, and you were soyou were there, and I mean
they had a parade, right,they had an Easter parade. Oh my
god, it was so fun.They had two Easter parades. One was
more tame and then the other onewas more of like a gay Easter parade.
And we were standing in front ofa gay bar where the parade was
going by, and there was aguy dressed in as Jesus and he had

(18:18):
he had like this strappy little topon and then basically a thong, and
he was handing out communion shots andpeople were taking them and they're like,
thank you Jesus, and he's like, I did it for you, and
he just was taking pictures with people. It was the best fucking Easter I've
ever had. It was a goodtime. That's nice. That's awesome.

(18:41):
Yeah, I think that. Ithink the other thing about New Orleans too,
is that if you were living anywherenear town, you would eventually get
sick of the constant parades, likethe you know, any any chance to
have a raucous, drunken parade throughtown, you know, for every every
minor holiday, Arbor Day, youknow, National Trombone Day, whatever they're
gonna like throw a parade. ButI think, I mean, that's part

(19:03):
of the fun of New Orleans.Though maybe Nashville was different because it's just
drunken bachelorette parties, where this hada little bit more culture thrown into it,
I felt. But I mean,you're right, I would probably with
any city, you're gonna get sickof certain things. So you know,
that was one. They had SaintPatty's Day here, they had like a

(19:26):
block party just about a block awaythat we went to went to brunch,
I mean, my two neighbors brunch, and then we walked around and just
like went from kind of bar tobar and they had a bunch of little
bars sit up. It reminded mea lot of Downtown Orlando when they like
kind of have block parties. Yeah, and they closed down like the you
know, three three different blocks,so you can kind of walk around the
whole area. It was really nice, except it was like just fewer people,

(19:48):
so it wasn't like so insane thatyou can't walk through the crowds,
And it was enough people that theystay busy and they make money and that's
good for them, but also enoughspace that you could actually walk in one
of the bars and like sit atthe bar, you can find a spot
maybe, you know, and thestuff like that, and that was really,
uh, really kind of nice.That's cool. Yeah, so I
just made me think of that too. Yeah. Well, also in New

(20:10):
Orleans, so we travel with hissister. It's funny. So his sister
was mentioning how her and her boyfriendare going on a trip for their anniversary,
and I was like, oh,interesting, because Roy and I are
celebrating our four year anniversary this Friday, which is crazy to think about.
It is crazy four fucking years ofjust going on our first date, right,
not officially like boyfriend girlfriend, butwhatever. Four years. So I

(20:33):
asked him. I was like,oh, that's interesting. You know,
your sister and her boyfriend are doinga trip. What are we doing for
our anniversary? And kind of justput that in his ear when we were
there, and then he's been planningstuff. So we have plans. We're
actually gonna do it on Thursday becausemy friend's coming in on Friday, so
we'll probably just do something more lowkey, but have something to do.

(20:56):
It's good, you know, todo something thing, you know, it
is it's important, Yeah, tohave something there typically don't do well.
We didn't do Valentine's date because Iwas in another country, and we didn't
celebrate last year because I was inanother country and we didn't Most of the
time i'm in another country, it'slike the things to celebrate. So yeah,
it will be nice since you happento be here for once with him

(21:17):
and the same you know, thesame state, same city, same house,
as we'll do something. Yeah,it is hard to believe that four
years ago you went on a reallybizarre, masked picnic date with with Roy
and uh, I don't think wewere well. Our first date was actually
a zoom date. Yeah, thiswas like the zoom date. Yeah.

(21:40):
So this was because I was gonnaI was watching Love Is Blind and I
was gonna unmatch him because he's likeour conversations kind of died. I was
like, yeah, maybe I willunmatch him. And then for whatever reason,
it was like fine, love Loveis Blind, like the first season
that came out. I just gaveit some hope and said, what the
fuck At this point everything sucks anyways, how could this get any worse?

(22:02):
And one on the date with him? Was it your second date? That
was the picnic. It was likefive dates after because I just I just
remember that. You still we stillhave people mad at you before it.
Oh see, I didn't even realizepeople were mad at me for that.
They said something. Yeah, yeah, I know, we knew that.
It was like it was my Valentine'sDay, my birthday. Celebrating my birthday

(22:22):
pissed a lot of people off it. Okay, that's right. Where no
one was at with my two friendsthat were vaccinated was yeah, that's right,
that's what it was. I thoughtit was the day with Roy Okay,
no, no, no, ourfirst our first date. We sat
six feet apart or whatever the fuck, and eight public subs by the river,

(22:42):
and we're afraid to hug one anotherbecause that's what it was in twenty
twenty, public subs. I wishthere was a public serre that. I'll
say. That's one big flaw.None of the fucking grocery stores here even
come close. But well, that'sthat's yeah, okay, that's true.
That's that's that's very sweet. Though. I'm glad you guys going to have
do something, hopefully be something funand you don't know what it is though.

(23:04):
It's just I have no idea.Imagine it's probably gonna be something like
dinner or something. I mean,I feel like you're flying to somewhere random
and on a Thursday night to comeback by Friday. It makes no sense,
no way. Yeah, yeah,so but I don't. I guess
I feel bad because I'm like,should I just go to the store and
pick out a little gift of something? Yes, But you know how I

(23:26):
use this list and he has thislist of things that he wants. Yeah,
I know. But also you knowthat he likes to do things like
he likes to cook, So there'sprobably maybe like a cool ingredient you could
get the like, hey, thefigure might enjoyed messing with this or something
like that. You know, whatthe fuck am I going to get him?
Have you ever got Have you evertried black garlic? I've been I've
been trying to get you to getblack garlic for so long. What the

(23:47):
fuck am I gonna need black garlicfor? Out of what you put it
in your food? But it comes. It's it's got a little bit of
sweetness to it. It's different thanany other not regular garlic, and it's
so good that you're gonna want toput on everything. If someone gave that
to you for a four year anniversarygift, what the stuck would you think
you should put it in a littlebasket with like a couple other like ingredient
things that he might like to use. I don't know. I was just

(24:10):
trying to think of what, likeI mean, I see the vision,
I understand the vision. I wasthinking more, he loves sweets, so
I was thinking more of just goingto a store and just buying a bunch
of sweets and putting it in alittle bag. But I say, yeah,
it's Tuesdays, so it's too late. I was so he could go
to M and MS dot com andyou can actually get M and m's with
little messages on them for a reallycheap, relatively good price. You could

(24:30):
have gotten made if you had plannedthis at all. I know, like
we just don't do. I know, birth well, even just his birthday,
we were just going to go outto dinner and I got him something,
but he wasn't feeling up to goingout, so we just had takeout
instead. And now all right,right, so I don't know, and

(24:52):
I got donuts. I don't know, Maybe I should just buy something nice,
like, yeah, is there likea gourmet donut place or like a
one of those things that, Yeah, something like that might just be a
nice little like you know, inthe morning or whatever that you go get
that and that's kind of like ahappy anniversary or some sweets that you know
he'll eat by the end of theday, yeah, because he uh loves
his sweets. Well, I justdon't think it needs to be this big,

(25:14):
like what big gesture gift am Igonna get? Yeah, I know,
but it's something you know, butit isn't you know, it's important
to celebrate these milestones too, becauseit's you know, I don't disagree with
you, but I'd rather just goout and have a nice date and night
at a nice place that we haven'tbeen before that we've been wanting to try
that experience. And that's kind ofwhere we're different, where experiences are more

(25:37):
important to me than materialistic things andexperiences are important to him. But if
you could have a nice gift thathe wants, he's gonna want that,
you know. But he's also veryparticular, like I am. More like
he has this very specific things thathe likes and yeah, right, so
it's like why buy him just shitthat He's like, what do I need
this for? You know, whatdo I need black garlic for? You
picked up an ingredient? Great guaranteethough, Like if you got some and

(26:00):
you try cooking it, like itwould blow your mind and it would be
He'd be like, this is thebest ingredient I've ever had. Like I
want to put this in everything.I will buy it whatever, But I
just this episode is brought to youby black Garlic. We speaking of that.

(26:22):
It's ridiculous. I was going tosay something before we cut the break,
Yes, before we cut the break. You know, I've been trying
not to buy things because I justlike, I don't want to start clearing
again, and so I'm trying tolimit the limit my purchases to like do
I really need this in my house? Or is something can have on digital
ores somebody can just live without.But the other night, drunk I bought

(26:48):
this is this is the stupidest thingin the world. I pre ordered a
vinyl of Billie Eilish's newest album withlike a limited edition cover on it,
Like it's like a lemon to shitpainted cover and vinyl. Why is that
stupid? Well, I'll give youone guess. Why it's stupid. You
don't listen to Billie Eilish. Thatwould be smart. I love Billy Eilish.
Okay, another, how about anotherreason about a vinyl record? You

(27:11):
don't have a record player. Idon't own a phonograph. Well, I
guess I guess it's time to getyeah, or just have it and it
can hang it on my wall orsomething. I guess maybe it might be
the thing. But yeah, Iwas like, why am I buying a
record? I don't I don't owna record player. Did I really call
it a phonograph? I really did. I wasn't gonna correct you, but
I'm glad you corrected yourself because I'mlike, well, I mean that's what

(27:33):
it's called, right, That's whatit's called. Maybe, but people call
it a record player. Now,Back in whe day we called it a
phonograph. It's not the worst.Back in my day, we ate black
garlic and we called it a phonograph. It's not the worst purchase you could
have made. But yes, itdoesn't really make that much sense. Yeah,
I know, I said it lookedreally cool art and I and like,

(27:53):
she's one of my favorite artists.So I was like, eh,
Okay, maybe someday I'll have aplace where I have a record player and
that'll be the only record I haveand it'll be great. That's okay.
I only have three records. Sothen I had I want a record player.
And then it broke. So,oh I didn't know that it broke.

(28:15):
It a move, That's fine,it was free whatever. Alright,
Well, last question, can youremember what Roy's nickname was when you guys
first started dating. Oh yeah,master of none, Master of None.
That's right. You couldn't remember.I was. I couldn't remember, so
I was hoping you remembered Master ofNone. That's right. That's because he
bought me one. Like I'm gonnago to Whole Foods and pick up a

(28:37):
bottle of wine. What do youwant? Yeah, he used that line.
He did use that line. Allright. Well, with all that,
why don't we take a quick breakand when we come back, we're
gonna do a little update on lastepisode in February. February's episode about Passport
Bros. And so yeah, we'lltalk about that when we get back.

(28:59):
So when we did the Passport Bros. Episode, I did a clip that
I threw up on TikTok and likea little one minute clip that I pull
from our episode, and then onethat I put up on YouTube is a
YouTube short, and our YouTube shortsget people. YouTube YouTube commenters managed to
be still, even even with Twitterturning into x and turning into like an

(29:19):
alt right Nazi playground. YouTube stillhas the worst commenters. It's it's really
amazing just how how bad they are. And so you know this. In
that clip, I was just findingwhat a passport bro was. And I'm
not gonna go through it now becauseyou should have listened to the episode,
and so you should go listen toit if you don't know what a passport
bro is. But anyways, indefining it, I was not very kind

(29:40):
and I got kind. No,I don't I think I think it's a
terrible phenomenon. And nobody thinks passportbros Are some admirable, respectable group of
men. Those yeah, those menthemselves. And I got so many shitty,
you know, like shitty dudes commentingme like you're disparaging the name of
passport was. How dare you?That's not what we're about at all,

(30:02):
you know, we're all about wejust want to find you know, women
who respect us, and we allwant to find women who who you know
who who are going to be submissivein a traditional way and that you know,
that's sort they're trying to promote thatthey want. So we had a
little update on on kind of youknow, what your typical passport bro is
like. And it's a recent newsstory that I'm sure some of you have
probably seen across most of the mostsocial media. See this did not pop

(30:26):
up on any of my social mediachannels really, oh say it was.
I mean I saw literally on YouTube, TikTok, Instagram, and Twitter like
it was. It was literally everywherefor me. Just shows I guess the
you know, the content that Itend to see is related to this type
of stuff. Yeah, well,I guess Apparently what a thirty six year
old from Ohio was hanging around atwelve and thirty twelve and thirteen year old

(30:51):
girls with drugs and they found usecondoms and they let they didn't they detain
him and then they let him goto fly back to the Yeah, so
this is this guy. His nameis Timothy Allen Livingston. We're gonna get
his name out. Oh yeah,I mean everyone's been putting his name out
there. Yeah, he was caught, like a concerned Colombian resident called the

(31:15):
cops and said that they were worriedabout what was happening because they saw him
like in the elevator with this twelveand thirteen, the twelve year old girl
and a thirteen year old girl,and there were drugs related, like some
type of like a drug that theyhad to and so he called the cops,
and the cops go in and likego and to and like detain him.
But because when they got there,there was nothing happening, regardless of

(31:37):
fact that they found a bunch ofused condoms in the trash. And and
also why would a thirty six yearold man be with a twelve year old
girl and thirteen year old that he'snot related to in some way, you
know, like or no was inany capacity. But they they didn't hold
him for some reason and let himgo. And so the next day he
fled the country, immediately left.But he's not guilty. Why would you

(32:01):
no, no, of course not. And what what what made this into
like an international incident that everybody startedtalking about was this lawyer in Colombia.
She does a lot of content aboutlike sex trafficking and exploitation of Colombians,
and she talks about how Americans exploituh, you know, people in Colombia

(32:22):
as well, and passport Bros.As well, and so she wanted to
make sure that this this guy didnot get away with it. So she
usually does like Spanish language videos,but instead she did like an English English
language TikTok that was calling him outby name and and saying, listen,
he's a passport bro. He comeshere to try to, you know,
to take advantage of women and andtry to you know, use his money

(32:44):
to try to you know, tryto get what he wants. And he
cannot get away with this. Thisis not acceptable, and so it has
become such a huge issue now,I mean, like this him his actual
case is now international news. Surprise. Yeah, I know. The only
reason that this is international news isbecause someone's calling him out specifically, which

(33:05):
I'm glad you did on this episode. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah.
But like this happens all the timewith passport bros. Maybe not a twelve
and thirteen year old girl, butwomen in a position where they don't have
the power to speak up or takecontrol over the situation. Because that's they're
dating someone or they're with a guywith the money. And yeah, well

(33:30):
and I mean that's why, youknow, we talked about that too to
an extent too. Is it justthat if you have to go to a
foreign country to try to find awoman who's willing to talk to you,
there's something wrong with you, Likethat makes you that's extremely pathetic. And
then going you know a lot oftimes they they will go to countries where
the age of consent is a lotlower too, like the I think like

(33:50):
Thailan is a is a big popularplace among passport bros. And so there's
some overlap among you know, what'sconsidered sex tourism, which is this deplorable
frame by the way, sex tourismlike and that is not as not a
good phrase, that's like a euphemismfor for you know, what they're doing
and uh and the passport pros andyes, sometimes they go places in there

(34:12):
they're not looking for someone underage,but it doesn't make it any work any
better, Like it doesn't make itany better that they're they're trying to like
impress someone with Oh look I makeI think in our so we say like
fifty thousand dollars or yeah like that, they're like where your salary of fifty
thousand dollars can go so much furtherand try to oppress someone who makes,
you know, a fraction of thatand then try to basically put make her

(34:34):
beholden to you because she wants toget out of a maybe not a great
life, you know, a greatlife, and you're supposedly giving her a
better life when you know it turnsout you're she's just going to be essentially
your slave once you get to theget back to America too. I think
I think it's really good that thishas come out. I think it's because
it does call out passport pros forbeing a shitty concept. And yes,

(34:55):
well it's flat out calling out theconcept, not just a guy and his
actions, but saying he is apassport bro and putting those guys who prop
it up to shame of like,yeah, this is what it is.
Don't try to sugarcoat it and sayit's about cultural whatever experiences. That's not
what you guys are about. Yes, yes, I love and I do

(35:20):
love that everything is calling him passportBro. Timothy Allen Livingstone like it's not
like that that is part of hisname basically and the one one or the
other one and the other. AndI've seen people now like comment on when
people do post like about him,saying, trying to defend passport bros.
That's not what we're like. Youknow, I'll tell if you refer to
anything you do as a bro anyways, you're just a douchebag. Yeah,
that's just to say that too.Yeah, so now they're actually like a

(35:43):
judge of a Columbia judges asked forextradition, and so they are trying to
apparently extradite him to Colombia, andI think that would be fantastic now he
can. It is actually a crimein the United States too, to do
what he did in a foreign country. It's still a crime in the US,

(36:05):
So he's still violated a US law. But I would much rather prefer
that he get extra outed to Columbiaand have to go through their justice system,
because I think that would be ahuge awakening to the passport broke community
if he was if he was stuckin a Colombian jail. Yeah, damn.
So we're going to see what happens. But yeah, yeah, there's

(36:28):
our update on on one hat.We'll see what happens with him, hopefully
you know, of course what's gonnahappen. And this is just me being
randy about this, but of courseit's gonna happen. Is he's going to
become the hero of the GOP.He's gonna be the next Cole written.
Now, I don't say that CruiseTed Cruise is going to be like,
he's an American hero and then likeyou know, they're gonna make him the
next Seedback or some ship like that. This goes against family values. Yeah,

(36:50):
they don't. They don't actually careabout for I know they don't.
But this this tots the line ofjust being a little too controversial that they'll
say no to this one. Imean, Nick Fuentes is a literal Nazi,
and they have him. They likeNazis is okay in their book,
But someone who underage dealing with minorsand things like that, they draw a
lot. That's the one place Ithink they draw. We shall see,

(37:14):
we shall see. But I'm thinking, like in six months time, we're
going to see Lindsey Graham get uphere saying this man is an American hero,
oh God, and he should betreated as such, or some bullshit
like that because I could to seethem doing that. Yeah, I know,
we'll see what happens. But there'sa little update. This is also
a time when normally we would havea voicemail or an email from somebody I

(37:37):
know threatening you. I know exactly, I haven't No, I think I
have one or two more to use, but I just decided to save them
sparingly. But we would really lovea couple more calls. So I'm going
to ask you again, especially whilethe break's going on we're about to go
to break, to please call fouroh seven five one nine zero one eight
one and ask us a question.Tell us about scenario that you want to

(38:00):
get some input into just whatever,just something something related to your life that
you want to share, and youdon't have to give your name, you
can be anonymous. We just wantto hear what you have to say,
So, well, why don't youdo that? During the ad break and
when we come back, we're goingto have what to See with Sarah G.
And she's going to talk about whatI usually call Venezuela, but she

(38:21):
called Oh my god, where Ithought she was for two weeks? But
actually so she's gonna talk about Nicaragua. When we get back, well,
we're back with another what to see, And this week I am exploring Nicaragua,
not Venezuela. If you remember,earlier this year in February, I

(38:42):
was looking to escape the gloomy Seattlewinters and go somewhere a little warmer and
sunnier, and I ended up travelingto Central America and exploring Nicaragua, where
Granada was basically where I made myhome base during the trip. And although
I stayed in Granada for most ofthe time, I did get a chance
to explore a few of the otherssurrounding cities as well. What I did

(39:02):
find interesting when I was just lookingat places in Central America to travel,
and I've traveled to Guatemala before,is that not a lot of people consider
Nicaragua. When I was telling people, yeah, I'm gonna go here for
two weeks, I was met withbut why why would you go there?
When Costa Rica's right next door,or Guatemala or Belize or Panama. Why

(39:24):
would you go to Nicaragua? Andpart of it was, well, why
not. I'm highly motivated by cheapflights, and the flight was cheap from
Seattle, and I figured, youknow, if I could do two weeks
there. They have a coworking space. I've heard good things. It's low
in tourism right now, so I'llget really an authentic feel for the country

(39:45):
when i'm there. So that's whatI did, and I came to learn
during the trip that the locals reallywant tourism. They see, you know,
the bordering countries of Costa Rica andGuatemala. Well Guatemala doesn't border,
but you know, neighboring countries reallypick up in tourism for things like volcanoes

(40:06):
or just so many beaches and somany other things that countries in that region
have to offer. So when Iwas talking with locals there about tourism,
They're like, we're so happy you'rehere. What else do you want to
experience? We want to make thisthe best experience for you. And everyone
was just really friendly, and ofcourse I'm not fluent in Spanish, but
I was able to get by andI just felt really welcomed and I had

(40:28):
a good experience. That being said, I don't think if you're traveling throughout
Central America and you want to kindof hit everything in the region, I
don't necessarily think you need to bein Nicaragua for two weeks. Like I
was, I mostly just stayed inGranada and it is a relatively small city.
But if you just have a weekto explore, I have a lot
of recommendations for just a solid week, and let's just start with volcanoes,

(40:52):
because Nicaragua has twenty six volcanoes,and there are a couple that are actually
worth the visit. The first oneI would check out is my Saia volcano,
located in the town of Messiah.It's about a thirty minute drive from
Granada, where I was, andit is actually the most active volcano in
the country. But I was surprisedbecause it's not your typical volcano where you

(41:13):
look up to the horizon and yousee this big volcano, you know,
and the explosions and all the lava. No, this was nestled underground in
like the not caves, but youknow, it was down there and you
had to look down to see thelava. And it wasn't a type of
volcano where if you went during theday you would see anything. You would
just see a whole bunch of smoke. So when you drive up to it,

(41:37):
I guess the Spanish explorers actually calledit the Gates to Hell because it's
just fired. They didn't call it. Nobody called it the Devil's butthole,
but we can. So I thinkthat's insulting. Actually, I even think
the Gates to Hell is kind ofinsulting for the locals who lived in that
area. But the Devil's bundle Jesusrist. But so if you do go

(42:02):
to the Messiah volcano, I wouldrecommend doing a sunset tour or just driving
up and going by yourself around thattime, because it's the best time once
the sun goes down to be ableto see the lava. I will lead
with a caveat that. If yougo, just in general, make sure
you have sunglasses to protect your eyes, and some kind of face covering scarf

(42:23):
something like that, because my eyeswere fucking burning. Everybody was coughing,
and everyone's standing off the side,leaning over trying to see the lava and
just coughing, and then the windblows. So just bring some protective gear
and don't stand by the crater fortoo long if you go see Messiah.
The second volcano which is my mustmust see is Saro Negro outside of Leone,

(42:46):
Nicaragua. So I didn't realize this. When I traveled over there,
I just thought, you know,this volcano is going to be so cool.
But if you follow any kind ofbucket list travel activities, it's actually
listed on CNN's Travel like Mustdos andMost Adventurous Things as the second most thrilling

(43:07):
thing you could do on vacation.It's like they're little yeah, in general,
it is the second thing. Ifyou type in most thrilling things you
can do on vacation list CNN,it is listed as the second most thrilling
thing you can do because at thisvolcano you can volcano board down it,
which is incredibly unique. And didn'teven realize that was a thing. It's

(43:29):
only like thirty five to forty dollarsto go. You do have to hike
up the volcano, and it's abouta forty five minute hike. It's not
too too hard. You do haveto carry your board with you, or
you can maybe your guide will carryit for a cost or whatever. But
you hike up to the top ofthe volcano, you suit up, you
wear protective gear. You're gonna getso fucking dusty. It's not even funny.

(43:51):
But I've done, you know,snow tubing, and things like that.
So I was really terrified I wasgonna down the volcano and that's the
end of me. But I wassurprised that actually had a lot more control
going down the volcano because you canput your feet on both sides of the
board and lean back and forward tocontrol your speed. So it's about,
you know, a minute to twominute ride down, But it was so

(44:13):
worth it. I mean, fuck, I would do it again. It
was a great time. The onlything. Forty minutes to climb up and
two minutes to go down. Imean, are you surprised by that?
No, that's just it, youknow, That's why. That's why I
don't like skiing. It's same timeof concept. You know, it takes
full song to get up and thenyou go down again. But I mean,
yeah, but the the hike reallywasn't too bad. Plus it's pretty
beautiful around there. But of course, as we're hiking up, like this

(44:36):
volcano last erupted thirty thirty ish yearsago, and I'm hiking up, going
what the fuck am I doing onthis goddamn volcano then? And our guy's
like, no, one, it'sgonna be a while before it erupts again.
I'm like, oh, we're justrisking my life right now, that's
cool just to slide down it likea dumbass, But it was. It
was honestly the best thing that Idid while I was there. Of course,

(44:59):
if al Canos aren't your thing,within both of the cities of Granada
and Leone, there are a lotof really beautiful churches that you can climb
up to the top of and getsome amazing views of the city and take
some photos. There's also a lotof lakes around the area. There's these
lettas, there's I did a wholeit was called the Water and Fire Tour,
and that was like the morning andthe afternoon we spent at the lake

(45:22):
and then we went to that Messiahvolcano. So there's a lot of water
activities if that's something more up youralley. Of course, there are the
beaches on both sides of the country. I just wasn't able to get over
to that side. And then ifpartying is your thing, which I learned
on this trip that is not mything. There there is a jungle party

(45:44):
at this treehouse hostel about twenty minutesoutside of Granada, and this rave starts
at around four pm, so they'llpick you up at four and it ends
at four in the fucking morning.You know, as little as a little
as I like people as much aslike the Spies, people that like a
jungle rave and from four pm tofour am sounds kind of amazing to me.

(46:07):
It does until you're well, okay, so I'm speaking from an old
woman's perspective. I'm an old lady, and I knew this probably wasn't gonna
be all up my alley, butI'm I'm down to try things, and
I think going in with an openmind was a good thing. I was
good for about three hours because youget there, you see the sunset,

(46:30):
and that was why I wanted toget there at four. I wanted to
see you're literally in the jungle,see the sunset, hear the birds climb
around. There's the treehouse area,then there's another DJ station that has other
stuff, and you're in two differenttreehouses. So the setup was really cool,
but the vibes just were not forme. They played a lot of

(46:50):
European house music, and to me, it just sounded like alien music after
a while, and I wanted toblow my fucking brains out. Excuse me,
but that's both. There were somany other Americans there going what the
fuck? And I was so surprisedthat, yes, there were Americans there,
but there were so many more Europeantravelers. I guess doing a Central

(47:10):
American travel trip for three months,and so Nicaragua was part of their stop
and the music was really tailored towardsthem. They played Murder on the dance
Floor and one song from Mama Mia, and those were the two times the
crowd fucking lost their shit, andthen they went back to playing alien music

(47:31):
and I was like, did youlearn nothing? This is what the people
want, and I just kept holdingout for actual music, you know,
I'm there for the vibe, andit just didn't happen. So it was
about forty dollars for a ticket,and it's a high price tag for locals,
so there aren't locals there. There'slocals working the event. So if
you're looking for a local activity,this isn't it. If you like European

(47:53):
house music, perfect just not somethingfor me, but want to throw that
out there. That is something youcan do and it is a big thing.
On Friday nights in Granada, there'sfucking nobody around because everyone goes to
the jungle party, right, Iimagine a lot of they probably don't always
go at four either, Like theyprobably know if they're going for the party,

(48:15):
they probably don't go till ten oreleven. Yeah, and some people
get well, the last the lastbus to get in is eight, so
you have to be there at leastby eight o'clock. And then eleven is
when the first pick up. It'seither ten or eleven the first pickup is.
But at that point, I don'tknow. It's just I could go
on and on about the jungle partyexperience, which I know when you told

(48:37):
me that you were going to oneof those, I was, I was
like, I was so excited tolive vicariously through you, and then you
were so You're like so annoyed there. It was. It was so funny
when you're like on your Instagram storyand then telling me how bad, just
how how annoyed you were about everythingthere. I mean, yeah, it
was. The bathroom situation was probablythe most interesting bathroom I've ever had to

(48:59):
be in. You know, it'sjust like being in another country with a
different set of infrastructure, and you'reliterally in a jungle in the middle of
nowhere, so you're gonna squad overthis thing and hope for the best type
of experience. Are the animals inthe jungles? You know, I'm fucking
sure there are, because I wasasking that question too. And then my

(49:22):
other question was how does this musicand lights affect the animals every Friday night?
This probably fucks them up their nocturnalsystems or whatever. You're like excited
about it. They go dance,That's what No, that's what I was
concerned about, not the people trippedout on whatever the fuck they were on.
I'm worried about the fucking animal right. Anyways, those are some things

(49:42):
you could do. And then asfar as food goes, I ate very
well, especially in Granada, Butif you're very short on time and you
want more of an authentic Nicaraguan dish, you have to go to this restaurant
called restaurant is Comitas Tipicas Emas Granada. We were told by the locals at
our hotel that it was the bestplace for the traditional food, and I

(50:06):
totally agree. The service was great. Just keep in mind in general everything
I spent a lot more cash thanI expected to in the country, and
so this was one of the placeswhere I needed cash, and I was
running low and almost I was worryingabout how I was going to pay because
I did not have enough cash.So bring a lot of cash, or

(50:27):
don't bring a lot of cash,just have a lot of cash on you.
There's ATMs everywhere. But that wasa learning for me because I'm just
so used to barely ever taking outcash unless you know, I have fifty
one hundred dollars worth of an emergency, you know. But overall, a
great country, lots of great thingsto explore people, And yeah, that's
what to see this week. Well, just so you know, there are
jaguars. Oh you looked at don'ttell me that. Oh gusts, Okay,

(50:52):
those are fine. Well those arekind of those are just small jungle
cats. So there's two types ofjungle cats that are that. Are there
sloths? You could have seen somesloths. Oh, I did see monkeys.
I did see monkeys. Yeah,then yeah, and then a lot
there's a few different variations of monkeys, howler monkeys and other types of monkeys.
And then bats, lots of batstoo. It looks like different types
of bats. So just a fyiand what maybe you would have seen if

(51:17):
you were in the jungle at adifferent part of the jungle, or there
wasn't a rave going on. Yeah, And the other interesting thing about traveling
there was well, I had watcheda lot of travel videos before going there
to kind of get a grasp ofwhat my experience might be like. And
some people were saying, and Idon't have a reference point because I've never
been to Costa Rica, but somepeople were saying that Nicaragua was what Costa

(51:39):
Rica was before it blew up withtourism because no offense Costa Rica. I
don't have a big draw towards CostaRica just because it seems too commercialized by
the Western world. I think it'sI think, you know, staying at
one of the resorts and whatever wouldbe a really beautiful experience. But I
do like some of the local experienceswhere you really feel part of the culture

(52:04):
and they have that, you know, that's all of what Nicaragua offers versus
I think coast Rieka is more westernizednow. So I just thought that was
really interesting considering they share their they'rebordering countries, and they share a lot
of similar features as far as volcanoesand lakes and craters and all these things.
So yeah, just keep that inmind. Interesting, right, that's

(52:25):
all. I got. No moreraives for me. That was my last
ray of thirty two. I'm done, Yes, your last rap. Oh,
I forgot to tell you. That'swhat Roy has planned for you as
you guys are going to it EuropeanRave. It's just it's purely Eurovision songs.
So that would be but Eurovision songswould be fucking better than what they

(52:49):
played. How I like house music, I like like I like the just
the building crescendos and of like,you know, that's not what this was.
That's not what this was. Letme reiterate that held On maybe hasn't
described the music a little bit.Can can you sing a little bit for
me? Since since it was justthat the entire fucking nothing. But there
was no building of anything, oflike, there was no fucking beat drop,

(53:14):
nothing, just the same And Icouldn't tell the difference between one song
and the next because it was justnothing. Yeah, like that's you know.
When I went to Iceland, Iand went to an Iceland strip club,
it was like that worthy music wasone long song that I couldn't tell
the difference of when it was beginningand what was ending and the music was

(53:35):
not great, so I will saythat yeah, well yeah, because some
Europeans, really, some people fromGermany really got on my case because they're
like, why aren't you dancing?Like I really don't like this music,
and they're like this is all weplay back in Germany, and I was
like, I fucking hate this.I feel sorry for you. All right,
well, thank you very much,And where are I gonna go take

(53:59):
our final break of the show andwe come back where you're going to talk
about the four B movement and discusshow women don't need men anymore. So
we'll be right back. So lastweek I did a TikTok that said that
I posted that was just basically saying, hey men, you know you're not
competing with other men for women becauseI see so many, you know,

(54:22):
like so many shitty male dating coachesthat are saying things like, you know,
you've got to be you know,you're you're competing against yeah, yeah,
you know, like it's the it'sthe you know, it's that alpha
male Chad who's you know, who'sgetting ninety percent of the women on the
dating apps. Soff like that,I was like, and so I did
this video. That's like, you'renot competing with with other men. You're
competing with peace of mind. You'recompeting with, you know, a nice

(54:44):
night home. You're competing with beingable to wear whatever she wants without being
judged. You're competing without worrying aboutbeing gas lit or assaulted. You know,
you're competing with like, you're competingwith all of these things that have
nothing to do with another man.And that the sooner you can learn that
and and become a person that awoman actually wants to have in her life,

(55:05):
then you realize there's no competition atall, and that's all you have
to do is just become someone thata woman, you know, because women
don't need men. And it didpretty well, and I got a bunch
of comments that women kept saying,uh, like four B four B,
you know, and stuff like that, and I wasn't. I didn't really
know what that was. So thenI googled it and was reading about this
four B movement and uh. Andthen later on in something like something else

(55:28):
you sent me to brought it upas well. It was it was like
men talking about it, of coursein a shitty way or whatever, and
and you know, but you werelike, you should stitch these people too,
yeah, and then I was like, and then we have a topic,
and so yeah, well yeah,and there's been this huge influx of
shitty men on TikTok talking about well, what are you gonna do if you're
not with men and women are stitchingit being like happy, I don't know

(55:51):
a lie, Yeah, yeah exactly. So so like so it's just interesting
that, like, you know thatthe concept that women don't need men is
something we'll get into. But thenlike this four movement is its own separate
thing that's been going on for awhile now, right, Yeah, I
think so. You pulled an articleand it said around twenty fifteen or twenty
sixteen, the no marriage lifestyle wasgrowing in South Korea and kind of just

(56:16):
boycotting men and reproductive labor more ina broad sense. So that's they've had,
you know, almost ten years toreally build up the momentum for this
movement because it's not gonna happen overnightwhere huge groups of women are saying yeah,
we're done, you know, Andyou and I were talking about this

(56:36):
too. I think South Korea isjust ahead of us as far as a
movement where we're not putting up withmen's bullshit anymore. We're we're at the
awakening stage. As for people whoare actually online, not critically online,
but just somewhat online, they're seeingmore content about women. We don't have

(56:57):
to tolerate this anymore. Men.You should be acting like this and calling
out men and their shitty behaviors.Where I think South Korea has just had
a little bit of steam on aheadof us in that sense, and I'm
happy that more people are talking aboutthis and just the expectations of women don't
need men to be happy and everythingthat's been happening in South Korea. I

(57:20):
guess that has been reported because ofthe B four movement. Their government is
concerned because they had to close schoolsdown because they don't have any first grade
students anymore. For like a coupleof schools just didn't have first graders this
year because women aren't reproducing with men. So that's the cause. And I'm
seeing that trickle a lot into Americanpolitics now and conversations in the media of

(57:47):
our birth rates are starting to getlow. What are we going to do?
And it's like, have you consideredany of the options that would make
it more desirable for women to wantto have a child, not only just
a part partner being a stronger candidate, you know, but also child costs
and food prices and cost of allof these other factors. Yeah, all

(58:09):
of these other factors would really makeit more desirable to want to have kids.
Let's just forget about climate crisis andother things going on in the world.
But if we if we've fixed theinfrastructure of those things, it might
be more desirable. But at theend of the day, it's men,
you know, like to reproduce,you do need unfortunately, some kind of

(58:30):
male sperm, So just don't ifthat's not something that's interesting to you and
dealing with men, just don't doit. And of course at America they're
you know, instead of doing thesethings, they're also like, let's just
take away the ability to have abortion, right, because then you can't have
an abortion, you have to havekids. So what's interesting. And so
the South Korean movement because South Koreais more patriarchal in nature, and you

(58:55):
know, there are more there arestricter standards of what women and men are
supposed to do, you know,supposed in quotes by by society, and
that just got overwhelming with people,but I love that. So four B
is actually what it actually stands for, because I was like, where does
this come from? Too? Isthat be in Korean means no, and
so it's it's B hone which meansno marriage, be chusan, which means

(59:20):
no childbirth, B yone, whichmeans no dating, and B sex su
which means no sex. So it'slike they're saying no to these four things,
heterosexual marriage and heterosexual sex basically iswell obviously, but so that's what
four B stands for, which Iwhich that was really interesting because I was
trying to figure out where four Bwas coming from, like having no understanding
of Korean language or like that,I was like, what what does four

(59:43):
B mean? It's like I thoughtit was like a like a law that
said that someone in Korea had enactedthat women were fighting against or something like
that, you know, like thefour B law or something like that.
So it's interesting. But yeah,so it's it's giving Korean women to the
day this many years later now stillthe ability to basically live autonomou and and
that because women have the these womenhave basically come to the conclusion that Korean

(01:00:08):
men are beyond redemption, which likethat I thought that was really a powerful
phrase. Korean men are beyond redemptionand with they have a very high intimate
partner of violence in South Korea aswell, and and and you know,
and they're just instead of asking mento change, they're tired, they're exhausted

(01:00:29):
of asking men to change, likeall right, fuck it, we're done,
no more men. Yeah, Andit's just like that is that is
that's a powerful thing to do.Well. It's like why would you put
up with a system that's not workingfor you? And everything in this article,
everything is built around the patriarchy.How women have to purchase clothing to
look presentable, do their hair acertain way, wear makeup, present in

(01:00:52):
a certain way that's desirable. Ialso think in parts of South Korea,
when you're submitting for a job,you also have to include a headshot and
look presentable in order to be hired. Like there's certain patriarchal things built into
their system. And then of coursewomen aren't paid as much as then the

(01:01:13):
pay gap is so fucking huge thatit you know, so they're abstaining from
dealing with men knowing that they're notgonna make as much. But it's like,
you know, they their culture isbuilt in a way that it's like,
yeah, you marry because you're notmaking as much money as the man
and you're gonna need him, soit sucks to suck. Just just do

(01:01:35):
it. You have no other option. And women are saying, yeah,
I'm fucking done with that. I'lljust I'll just not I'll make do with
my less money, but at leastI'll be fucking happy. Well, and
if you don't have to spend moneyon you know, fashion for men and
on beauty products because you know thatthe men expect you to wear, that
also ends up saving you money too. And I think that that's yeah,

(01:01:59):
the it's it's it's and it's madeof it's made. It's made a statement,
it's made a very very declarative statement. Well, also, the Korean
government hasn't done anything to make thesituation better either, like surprise, Similar
to the US, the Korean governmentlaunched an online national birth map, and
it showed the number of women ofreproductive age in each area and illustrated what

(01:02:23):
it expected of its female citizens.So basically, women were treated like fucking
livestock and they're just mapping out whatwe expect, how many kids we expect
these women to produce for our societyand the whole function of like help us,
help you. It's like, no, you're not fucking helping us.

(01:02:44):
You're just treating us as another numberto build your fucking workforce in society.
We're done, yep, fuck you. Yeah. I think I think I
saw that one one of the womenreplied by creating another map that showed where
all the men with sexual function where, showed the high you know, and
I thought that was that was kindof kind of funny and just a good

(01:03:04):
way to respond to that too.I just saw, actually, maybe you're
the one who said it to meTikTok that I want to respond to,
which was some douche dude saying thatit's a red flag to him if a
woman doesn't want to have children thatto o yea yeah, yeah, so
like yeah, like I thought youdid. And and like that guy was
so like just like I don't know, like I'm watching him just getting mad
listening to him being be like,I mean, she should want to do

(01:03:28):
this, and she should you knowwhat, and just like and and basically
describing a woman as being a breedingmayor for him and having no understanding of,
first of all, the risks ofpregnancy, because even though it is,
you know, it's it's obviously we'renot in the you know, the
seventeenth century anymore. It's it's stilla dangerous thing. It can still women
still die in childbirth. They alsoexperience extreme physical changes to their body,

(01:03:50):
emotional changes and you know, chemicalchanges everything. And he's just dismissing it,
like you should just you should justwant to do this, uh,
you know, because that's right forfor me. And and I'm just like
these guys, the fucking audacity.That just the sheer fucking audacity. It's
the I want to continue my lineage, Like, bitch, who are you

(01:04:11):
the king of fucking England? Whatwhat do you mean? You want to
continue your genes on to the nextgenerations like the Nazi guys. So I
was like, you know, Arianrace is the best race, and you
always look at them and they literallyhave no chin, and you're like,
you, you are the worst exampleof your race. And you know you
should not perpetuate your you in anyway whatsoever. You should you should be

(01:04:32):
able to die out. Yeah Iwish you would, Yes, we all
wish the people like that would.Yeah, and if it's a red and
that's the thing, if you thinkit's a red flag that women don't want
kids, you're the red flag,dude, Like you need to understand.
And I also have heard people onlinetalking about men don't like it that women

(01:04:55):
are saying no to having children becausethey can't fucking control anything around it,
right, They can only really restrictthat. They could not use a condom
and stealth, or they could justI mean, that's really all they can't.
It can rape obviously, which youknow that whole situation, but they
can't control if you're not having sexwith them. They can't do it,

(01:05:17):
can't do anything about it. It'sthe one it's honestly the one thing that
women have should have full control over. Really they do of saying, yeah,
I don't want to have a kid. Minus the laws going on right
now in the country of trying torestrict abortion access in all this but oh
in Arizona, by the way,yeah, just past a or just the

(01:05:39):
Supreme Court said that the only lawon the on the books now because of
Roe v. Wade used to blockit was like eighteen something thirty four or
something. Yep. Abortion is onlya lowed of if it affects the life
of the of the mother, that'sthe only time. So rape and incests
not exception. On the plus side, the Attorney General, who is a
woman, has said that you willnot in any way enforce that law in

(01:06:01):
Arizona. So she refuses to well, yeah, because they're saying you could
be thrown in prison for like acertain amount of Yeah. Yeah, but
she's refused to do that, whichis at least positive in that way.
But yeah, so yeah, Andthat's the thing that's the that's the really
infuriating thing is that men instead ofseeing this happen and say why is this

(01:06:21):
happening? What what can we doto make to make things better? What
can we do, like you said, in providing child care, providing you
know, like, how how dowe make it so so having a child
is more attractive? Yeah, insteadof doing that, instead of you know,
offering like you know, family leaveand and and you know, and
providing better childcare options and better welfareoptions and better you know, food stamps

(01:06:45):
and and and better protection of childrenonce they're alive, you know, and
all of these things, and inschool and all that, improving the education
system all of these things. Let'sjust make it harder for women to have
control over their own bodies, likeand to because that's what they think they
can. Yeah, and it's butit's just like it's it's I I'm not
gonna be surprised when the next movementis goes from being a passive for me,

(01:07:10):
like, you know, just noneof these things to pro castration,
Like it's just gonna become like they'relike, that's that's the next step.
It's just like, oh, soyou want us to take you now,
now you're trying to make it harderfor women to you know, we all
have controller body. Sorry, let'sjust make sure men have nothing left to
uh to impregnate women with. Andlike, I honestly can't like that.
That feels like that's a movement thatI can see happening because of how men

(01:07:30):
have reacted to this. I Yeah, it's infuriating to no end. And
I think it's only with South Koreaas the example. I think this in
the next couple of years is buildingand will be a bigger thing in the
United States. Of course, there'sstill going to be people who want to
be in relationships with men, marrymen have children with men. That's I

(01:07:55):
don't think you're gonna completely eradicate thatwith these movements, but right now,
at least in the US, weare in the awareness phase and we're finding
things out and how other countries aredealing with these situations, and we're going
you know, that doesn't sound likethe worst thing I've ever heard. Being
with a man sometimes is the worstthing I've ever heard. So this is

(01:08:17):
desirable. And and like you said, there's so many people now in comment
sections when men are shitty basically belike four B, four B. I'm
done. This just proves my fuckingpoint. I want nothing to do with
men. And yeah, like thereare there are still there're still gonna be
men who are desirable listen to women, and we'll give them the space to

(01:08:40):
be there, you know, autonomousand all that. But right, and
those men are gay. But forthe most part, I think some men
refuse to learn. And this isthe only way it's going to get through
to you. If you can't findsomething to fuck to ap procreate with,

(01:09:00):
then yeah, the you know,because I think the population in the ends,
so like if we're bring this fromSouth Creator to America, the population
in the US is probably split prettyevenly between men and women. I feel
like, I don't think it's quitefifty to fifty men and women, but
it's it's close. Yeah, Ithink there's slightly more women than men.
But right so that if you dohave even you know, if you have

(01:09:23):
a percentage of women who have decidedthat they are no longer participating, that
means there is a beef and theseonly large number of men who are now
no longer having any any possibilities whatsoever. And you know, of course in
our society, in American society too, women didn't need men they did in

(01:09:43):
the seventies because, which is notthat long ago, they couldn't have a
they couldn't have a bank account,bank account, or buy a house.
I think bank account it was inthe sixties or fifties is when you could
finally open your own bank account withouta man, without your husband present or
your father. And then I thinkbuying a house was the seventies. You
couldn't buy a house as a womanin a recently enough that there are people

(01:10:08):
who are still alive and around duringthat time who like who went through that
themselves, Like that's crazy to me. Yeah, So now. Of course,
women are at this point where they'relike, I don't like now,
I don't need you. I don'tneed you for these things. And and
men, men need to understand thatif a woman chooses to be with you,
like if she wants to be withyou, that is a that's a

(01:10:29):
positive thing, like that's a that'ssuch a that's such a healthy thing as
someone like I am choosing to bringyou into my life because I don't need
you, but I want you.And for a man to not understand that
and instead get insulted and say,well, yeah, you do need me.
Who's gonna kill the spider next timeyou have a spider? Or who's
gonna who's gonna change your tire foryou? Or you know? Or or

(01:10:53):
who do you think built the roadyou're driving on or built that house you
live in, you know, andlike and and and getting defensive and shitty
about it instead of me like,oh, you know, I want to
become the type of man that youwant to be with. Like that that's
the healthy The healthy way to gois to say like, and that's the
rational way to go. But thisirrational defensiveness of these men get is so

(01:11:15):
fucking pathetic, like it is justand and and it's like it serves you
right, dude, Like you arenever going to see or feel a touch
of a woman again for the restof your life because you've decided to be
defensive and you deserve it. Yeah, and you said something important too,
choice where I think there are menwho still uphold the traditional family values thing
we're getting married. Really, it'sa choice in who you choose. But

(01:11:38):
you're getting married regardless. That's notthe choice of getting married or not,
or having kids or not. It'sjust who you're getting married and having kids
with. It was never that wasnever a choice if you got to be
in the game or not. Yeah, And now it's more of a choice
of like, yeah, I don'twant to play this game. I'm fucking

(01:11:59):
out. And because marriage benefits themen in the situation more than the women,
men are even more. I mean, some maybe are noticing my quality
of life isn't what I thought itwould be at the ripe age of thirty
five, because I'm still single,living in a shithole and I've never cleaned
my apartment before or whatever. Youknow, where's the woman to take care

(01:12:21):
of this? To make my housesmell good, and so I have nice
sheets. There are so many fuckingmen on social media complaining and talking about
how when they go over to theirgirlfriend's house, their girlfriend's house is just
so much nicer and so much cleanerthan theirs, and they just prefer to
be over there at their girlfriends.I'm like, bro, you can buy
the sheets, you can clean yourapartment. Those are things you are totally

(01:12:43):
capable of, but always going backto relying on the woman to make you
feel at home, to make youfeel special. Like, do you understand
why women don't want to be withmen? Because and I mean, I
think there's a reason that single womenare happier overall, and that men in
relationships are happier, and it's becausemen in relationships tend to be being taken

(01:13:05):
care of, and women who aresingle don't have to take care of anyone
peace and that exactly. I justhad a friend tell me about a date
she went on that went really well. He seemed really great, and then
there was their fourth date and heinvited her back to watch a movie and
she said, sure, goes tohis place and immediately walks in and it
is the most disgusting place she'd everseen. She had dogs, and there,

(01:13:28):
she said, there was like doghair and piles all across the place.
There was trash everywhere, the disheswere piled up. He opened the
bathroom to go in the bathroom,and just when he opened it, she
could just smell piss. Oh mygod. So he came back out and
she was still standing because she couldn'tbring herself to sit down, and he's
like, oh, do you wantto take a seat on the couch and

(01:13:48):
she's like, no, I thinkI'm gonna go, And she left and
never talked to him again, Andlike, I'm just like, I don't
know how you can live like thatas a guy, Like it's just just
discuss me. But oh my god. To have the audacity to bring a
woman into that and expect her tobe like, have any romantic interest to
you whatsoever when all she's looking aroundand just seeing how literally disgusting you live

(01:14:14):
is laughable. And I don't Idon't understand in that situation either, why
you would think it's a good ideato bring someone over like you think that's
normal. And I remember, earlyon dating, I was so fucking impressed
when I would go over to aguy's house, and his place was nice
because I had been in situations wherehe's got a fucking pull out chair that

(01:14:35):
you like, you know, bringto a baseball game and a TV like
the stereotypical thing, and a coupleof posters of like scantily clothed women basically
on his walls. And that wasit. I'm like, is this an
adult that I'm trying to have arelationship with? So when I would go
to someone's house who had a couchand like a clean apartment, it was

(01:14:56):
a fucking game changer. But youdon't hear men really t talking about women
like that, like, Oh,I went over to her house and it
was fucking disaster, bro, shehad no decorations and just so discussing.
You never fucking hear men talk aboutit like that. Surprising. Wow,
imagine that? Wow? Yeah yeah, so I mean you know that.
I think it's just it really isan idea that, yes, women don't

(01:15:19):
need men, but men, byGod desperately need women. And if this
movement, I mean, people areso mad at this movement and just yelling
and criticizing this movement and not doingthe inner reflection of well, why would
women feel this way and get howwhat have we done for them to get
to a point where they're saying nomore, No, I don't care about

(01:15:42):
that. Change your thoughts. Wrong, wrong, wrong, That's that's all
they want to say. These guys. These guys will go to the gym
for, you know, twelve hoursa day because some other jim bro tells
them to. But how dare awoman suggest hey, maybe you should try
therapy, or maybe you should workon being a better partner. And no,
they don't, you know, theydon't want to do that. These
men are so obsessed with the conceptof being a provider and a protector,

(01:16:04):
even though they're not. They're neithera provider nor a protector. They're just
they're obsessed to the concept of beinga provider and protector, and they refuse
to actually try to be a partner. And I, you know, I
just think this movement is a goodreminder for all men, not even just
the men in South Korea. Allmen do better. Become a better partner,

(01:16:28):
be a man that women like andfeel comfortable around and respected around,
and a trustworthy guy. Yeah,stop trying to impress other men, and
stop listening to other men and insteadlisten to women, try to treat women
like human beings, and then tryto see what they want and listen to
what they have to say, andyou'll be amazed once again how healthy you

(01:16:54):
can be and how much of ahealthy relationship you can have too. Yeah,
it's amazing how a lot of ourtopics it always windows down to like
open communication, but now it's evenmore just listen to women. That's been
a lot of the topics have kindof leaned that way lately. And I'm
you and I obviously because I getso sick of talking about it because I'm
like, we've covered this enough,right, and then Passport Bros. And

(01:17:17):
then this movement, and I'm like, clearly we fucking haven't, because now
everything is dwindling into treat women likeother human beings. Women are not like
women with respect. Just treat themwith respect. That's it. It's real
simple. Yeah, I know.And it's funny because when I do kind
of up with topics like this,sometimes you're just like, didn't we just

(01:17:40):
do that? I was like,well, we did a variation, but
you know, it's so important becauseit's just one of these things that like
I just have to hammer it homefor anyone to even listen and that that's
it's unfortunate, but that's how that'show it is. Yeah, And my
biggest takeaway for this episode because it'snice to have another example outside of the
United States and see how women areresponding. My take way is, let's

(01:18:00):
have this happen in the United Statessooner rather than later. Let's start pushing
back more. Let's get out ofthe awareness phase of things and get into
the action side of yeah, we'rereally done now, We're not just We're
not just done and posting, youknow, tiktoks and things on social media.
We're actively calling more men out abouttheir shitty behaviors and saying, no,

(01:18:21):
I will leave your apartment because itlooks like a fucking mess. I
will leave this date right now becauseyou made me feel uncomfortable, instead of
trying to make men feel comfortable ina situation, because what good has it?
Look at the point where it's gottenus to right now and we're not
fucking happy with that. So Icontinue to make men feel comfortable. Sorry,
they have to be a little uncomfortable. We've been uncomfortable our whole fucking

(01:18:43):
existence. Yeah, yeah, wegotta come up with how we can do
four B and in America in English. I was thinking about that and I
was like, what can the fourbes be birth, betrothal, banging,
and the other one's dating, Soit's not a word for dating. Maybe
birth betrothal and what was the otherone? And banging? Banging? That's

(01:19:06):
pretty good dating dating. What wouldbe the only be related to dating I
can think of is bumble, Butthat doesn't really and bumble there none of
that's actually yeah, there we go, there we go. Yeah, there's
a there's the there's the English versionof four B. It's gonna be birth
patrol, a little bumble and bang. Let's just say no to all four
things and I mean bumble. Probablywon't like them being turned into a bad

(01:19:29):
phrase about that, that's right.Yeah, Oh, well it's for the
cause. It's for the cause.It's for the cause. Well, we
would love to hear your thoughts onthis, I think is this is a
very interesting topic. If you're awoman, love to hear you know what
you think about giving up men comeentirely like, is it something you're ready
to do, willing to do?You can you can call our hotline and

(01:19:51):
talk about it and we'll play yourvoicemail on on air. And that's a
that's at four oh seven five onenine zero one eight one. You can
email us your thoughts and that's Datingkind of Sucks podcast at gmail dot com.
And men, if you have anopinion about this too, and you're
listening, and even if you're hatelistening to this, you're like rage listening
and you want to leave a voicemail, we will respond to it and talk
about it like I want to.I want to hear you. If you

(01:20:12):
have an actual logical opinion, somethingthat you think makes sense that we haven't
considered, please by all means shareit with us, because it's something that
I think would be worth sharing withthe audience. And even if you don't
have a logical opinion, please shareit because it will still be valuable to
the audience. That's true too.And if you want to sound off in
our Facebook group about the four Bmovement or anything else like shitty behaviors,

(01:20:38):
whatever, you can go to ourFacebook group at Facebook dot com, slash
group, slash DKs podcast. Adam'sriding solo in there. I've been locked
down on my Facebook account for twomonths now, so I forgot about that
RPB and of course for five dollarsa month, you can become a patron
on our Patreon at patreon dot com. Slash DKs podcast we're gonna whenever we

(01:20:59):
actually do an episode, record alittle mini episode after that's exclusive for just
our members. Yes, and ofcourse if you want to watch this instead
of listening to us, you can. You can also follow our YouTube short
switcher entertaining YouTube dot com, slashdating kind of sucks, and then on
Instagram. I don't post them onadd dating kind of sucks on Instagram.
I post them on my own Instagram, which is audivitable, but you can

(01:21:20):
follow that too, and you canfollow seras and simply serergy, underscore yep.
And then of course five star ratingand reviews on iTunes if you haven't
already, please, for the loveof God, yes, if you've been
listening you have, We really wantmore because you know, like I said,
reviews have gotten stagnant just because we'vebeen doing this for the We're on

(01:21:41):
our seventh season, so like it'sbeen quite a while, so I understand
that most people have probably given usa review in a rating, but we'd
love for you to do it.If it's new. If you're new to
the podcast, please give us therating, reviews and a follow on Spotify
as well, and a rating andreview on there. They have those two.
That's right, and we will beback in two weeks if we can
find another good top I mean topicslike this I think are valuable to bring

(01:22:02):
to the table instead of just whatis this new dating word? What is
this new sex position? It's likeokay, yeah, yeah, So we
want to try to bring topics thatare that are interesting and and really,
you know, do an episode whenit's something that we feel like we have
it's just worth worth us mentioning indiscussing. So probably two weeks, say

(01:22:25):
two weeks, yeah, before Igo to another country that you don't know
where I'm at, so before shebut yes, so we'll talk to you
that until next time. Whether you'remarried or single or probably are hanging on
with maner's back at your place,listen to us and be getting a tenderman
mumble and plenty of young trying andtrying and happen to luck because we all

(01:22:46):
know dating kind of sucks. Sarahand Anamar Dulama kind says dud and she
doesn't they're not doing with thiss,so to make any fucks life as a
chicken woos feathers, say fus,why does it work, we'll hear.
With the Brucks, they both knowdating kind of sucks. Dating kind of sucks.

All Episodes

Women Don't Need Men Anymore - The 4B Movement

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

Stuff You Should Know

Dateline NBC

The Joe Rogan Experience

.css-15opob5{left:0;position:absolute;top:0.8rem;} All Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Women Don't Need Men Anymore - The 4B Movement