Bigger than the baby blues

Life changes don't come much bigger than having a baby. But with the excitement comes stress. Katy Gosset looks at coping with a new baby.

When it comes to life changes, it doesn't get much bigger than having a baby. But with the excitement comes stress. In Episode Seven of Are We There Yet? Katy Gosset looks at coping with a new baby and what to do when you find you're not coping.

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When you're preparing for a baby, along with all the other information you get, there's a thing called a "layette".

It's a funny word (it comes from the Old French term for a drawer) but, essentially, it's a kind of checklist of all the clothes and accessories your new baby will need:

- Nappies

- Babygros

- Tiny woollen vests

- Muslin cloths ... etc etc,.. you get the picture

Shame no-one really tells you about that OTHER post-baby checklist:

- Sleep deprivation (leading to general exhaustion)

- Anxiety

- The sense that you haven't a clue what you're doing

- Did I mention exhaustion?

And so on ...

Obviously, you love your baby and it's all very exciting but it is tiring and the sudden change to your lifestyle can come as a bit of shock.

"When baby arrived it was all sunshine and rainbows for the first few weeks and then reality hit and it all came crumbling down." - Mother of two

"The complete and utter change in your life is quite amazing and that's something you don't really get your head around until it happens." - Father of one

"Some people really love that young baby stage and I'm just a different person and that didn't suit me." - Mother of two

So coping with a new baby can be tough but what happens when we find that, actually, we're not coping?

I'm now finding that all the pressures of life just seem to be quite overwhelming. - Mother of two

For one mother things came to a head when she won a $250 voucher in a prize draw.

"Normally you'd feel pretty excited, pretty stoked that you'd basically won $250 and I just a felt a little bit of surprise, a little bit of disbelief."

She realised that she was increasingly numb and was no longer really feeling emotions.

It made her concerned that she might not be able to appreciate her child's development.

"I thought to myself, how awful would it be if my daughter reached a milestone like rolling over and I just think to myself "Wow, Whoopee." I couldn't stand the thought of that."…

Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details