Worrying times

Anxiety can silence many children and, as the anxiety gets bigger, people's lives get smaller. Katy Gosset looks at how to help kids face their worries head on.

Anxiety, anxiety everywhere, but not always a lot of help for parents trying to get their kids through it. Katy Gosset talks to a clinical psychologist about how to help children face their fears head-on.

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First things first. If your child is anxious about ...

Social rejection... driving a car... feeling pressured ... dogs... performing... earthquakes ... being perfect ... staying away from home ... wind... spiders...

You are not alone.

These are just some of the many themes troubling young people today.

"My son had quite, not extreme, but moderately difficult anxiety. If he was at school and had to take a message to another class he would be panicking, even if he knew the teacher" Mother of two.

"Anxiety, that's a big issue, with our youngest one. It came after the quakes. Then wind and rain. She had trouble going to school a lot of days." Mother of four.

"If we go somewhere and people are trying new things she will sit back, afraid of people watching her so it's a self-esteem thing. She worries that people might laugh at her." Mother of three.

And sometimes the anxiety brings on a physical reaction.

"It's almost like she just freezes. I know the signs in her straight away when she's starting to feel a bit uncomfortable and panicking." Mother of three.

This can make parents want to step in and protect their children.

"It's really holding her back in quite a lot of things which is frustrating for me to watch but I can understand how she's feeling so I do the best I can to help her through it." Mother of three.

Understanding It

So the good news first: Anxiety is hugely common.

OK, that's not really good news but anxiety is also both normal and completely necessary.

So says clinical psychologist, Catherine Gallagher, who regularly sees young people with anxiety issues.

Mr Gallagher says it's completely understandable that parents want to protect their children by stepping in and reducing uncomfortable feelings and experiences.

But there are other things they can do.

Number One is gaining a solid understanding of what actually drives anxiety.

Raising the Alarm

It all starts with our built-in alarm system.

"Like most living people we need an alarm system to signal threat."…

Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details