November 17, 2022 • 13 mins
Bethenny takes on social media as she rips down the curtain on the “perceived” hierarchy. From IG, to Twitter, to Tik Tok...what’s what, who’s who and what’s behind the bots?
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:11):
So Instagram, I guess people were crashing and people were
losing followers. And I saw one person, I think it
was Perez Hilton said that he lost five thousand followers
but they were all bots. And he said Instagram sucks anyway,
and that TikTok is the only platform that's relevant, it's alive, etcetera.
(00:34):
I don't agree with that. I think that all of
the platforms have things that are positive and negative about them.
For me, Twitters where you go to just like throw
a comment, fire a shot, and get into a fist fight,
a verbal fist fight with a bunch of people. Um.
But you also can get like actual news on Twitter
just look at someone's feed or CNNs feed and getting news.
(00:56):
For me, Instagram is where you post fake still photographs
of yourself looking perfect in a slower, more constipated um,
slighter fashion um. But now with reels, I feel like
they've come to play. For me, Instagram feels less of
the wild wild West than TikTok, which feels like you're
(01:17):
walking to a more rocan bizarre and shopping and you
could do really great, but you could also lose a
purse or you know, a hand, So that's how I
feel about TikTok as far as losing followers. I was
excited because I thought that the bots when you were
losing bots, because a lot of people were losing followers,
which translated into them being bots. I thought that all
(01:38):
the boats were probably fake followers, and maybe they are,
but I thought they were bought. I thought boats were bought,
and maybe some of the bots are bought, because if
you go on really famous people's instagrams, you see a
lot of like you gotta try this new financial thing
I did. I made five thousand dollars in two days,
or viagra or diet pills, and there there's like it
(02:00):
can be hundreds in a row, and they're sort of
talking to each other. And I don't understand where all
the bots come from and what they're doing. Besides if
they're advertising something, I get it. But bot trolls to
just troll you. What is their function? Who's hired them?
Like there are people that will come on and troll
me that have two followers and it's like a new
It always as user one to three on TikTok or something,
(02:20):
and I don't know where they are, and then you
look and they have three followers, and they say the
nastiest stuff. So it feels like if they say nasty stuff,
it's coming from some being who wants to say something
nasty to me. So I don't know where that. I
don't know where that comes from. But Facebook is still
the biggest of all of them, and Instagram is still next,
I mean by follower users worldwide. So and Instagram is
(02:42):
coming in. Instagram came in and knocked off Snapchat, which
was massive at the time with stories. We all forget that.
We all forget that that the biggest yogurt was fa
j In Greek yogurt until Chobani came. We all forget that.
You know, years ago, Steve's ice Cream was a little
place putting ice cream on slabs in Great Neck and
(03:04):
mixing top fixings into it until cold Stone Creamery. We
all forget that there were ten thousand spinning places until
soul Cycle came into the mix. So Instagram came in
hot and became Snapchat with the stories, but they weren't
doing it first. So Instagram is now coming for TikTok
with reels. They have more money. They have more money,
(03:24):
so let's not sleep on Instagram. That's all I have
to say, but back to the original matter at hand,
why can't Instagram have a breakdown and people with fake
followers get outed? Because I thought that these bots meant
that all the people with fake followers that they were
being caught with their pants down, and that was rather
exciting to me because I have seen so many articles
(03:46):
in Harper's Bazaar and readers Digest in crepytable um outlets.
That's say that so many people that have millions of followers,
a massive percentage of them are not real. You can
look this up at anytime, and there are companies that
will go look it up. And now I have not
I have bought followers to everybody does um Apparently who
(04:08):
has a lot of followers people that are not that
that doesn't mean they're bought because mine are not bought,
but they could be boughts. I don't know where they
come from. Someone else to educate me on that too,
But apparently if someone is more than twenty five of
their followers are not real, then they're bought. So I
think it's a confusing thing, and I think I welcome
Instagram flushing through people's bought followers. I mean, I would
(04:34):
love to see one of these, one of these massive
multibillion dollar platforms, come through and clean house properly. If
you're gonna take out bots, take out bots. We want
bots and bots gone. We want everything that's not legit
because people what about just like moms that are posting
pictures of their cats and dogs and Halloween costumes, et cetera.
(04:55):
And you know, they don't even know that it's not
even what I mean. If anybody can buy followers, the
whole thing is is a scam. If anybody can buy followers,
then the brands that are paying these famous people are
paying for what's a scam. They're paying to promote their
product two bots. And also these celebrities have gotten brand
(05:20):
deals because of their followers. They've gotten more followers because
of the media about their initial followers, so that's a
scam too. It's just endless. Social media has so many
places to scam, whether you're filtering your face to make
you look like nothing you actually look like, whether you're
pretending you have this following based on bots and bots,
it's just all such a fucking scam, and it's so
(05:43):
disheartening because people are just posting pictures of like costumes
and their dogs and their life, wanting to just compete
in this space that already isn't fair because celebrities run
social media, so now it's even more not fair because
you can just buy it. And I, you know, I
understand exactly why people would buy followers. It's so easy,
you know. I mean, I would have ten million followers
(06:04):
if I had bought followers in the beginning and just thought,
who fucking cares? Because there are articles everywhere no one cares.
You get no credit for doing the right thing. I
get no credit for not filtering my face and then
you end up looking older than everybody. You get no
credit for not buying followers because then you just like
the loser who has you know, not a lot of followers.
(06:24):
It's just historic. You get no credit for not wanting
to post yourself in a fucking thong, because that's how
you get followers is to be like sexualize everything and
be like, look how good and sexy I look, and
how fake I look. It's just all the circular reference
of bullshit. So if I put a thong on and
filter myself and get you know, fake gass and and
(06:45):
and and have fake followers, then I'll be winning in
the celebrity landscape. You can fucking keep it. All I'm
saying is pull everyone's pants down. No filters, no fake followers,
Let's fucking do real. Yesterday I went to my daughter's
(07:11):
last volleyball game. She played the entire game. Um, it
was at a it was an away game at another school,
and Paul and I had an event for the Holocaust Museum,
a charity event, and I told him he would go,
we would go, and his parents were going. And it
involves the hair and the makeup and the dress and
the whole thing. And Brent's last volleyball game. And I
(07:32):
go to all her games and it means something to her.
And I made this rule that I would not miss
the meaningful things. It kills me to miss them. I
think those are really important things. Just the look on
my daughter's face every time she did something great, she
caught something like I would, you know, And you don't
want to be on your phone. You want to be
really engaged, because you see every time she passed a ball,
or when she served perfectly, but then somebody else, one
(07:53):
of her teammates, maybe didn't didn't nail it. And just
so I know that even though they lost the point
that I saw how well she did and I love
and at the end it was like, I know, I
saw everything. You killed it, you did well because she
happened to have a really great game. Um, and I changed.
And then the game was late. It was forty minutes.
They started late because of the kids before. I'm not
gonna like carrying it up and go to the freaking
(08:14):
other school, be like, we gotta get the game on
the road. I have a charity event at Chippy Eye
Ballroom where you know, rich Jewish people are, you know,
donating to a very important cause. It just doesn't feel
like it's gonna land at the fucking volleyball game. And
you know, in middle school. So I'm sweating. I'm freaking out.
We've got to an inexpensive hotel room to change in
(08:35):
in between the volleyball game and the thing, because I
didn't want embarrass her and be like a black tie
down in a sweaty hot middle school gymnasium. Oh my god,
lo and behold, I'm like, we're not gonna make it.
We're not gonna make it. We're not gonna make it.
We're gonna be late to the thing. Then the whole
purpose of us going to this thing is defeated. Now
we've wasted money, even though a little bit of money
(08:56):
for that hotel room. And I'm like, what are we
gonna do? So I'm like, we gotta change here. So
all my clothes, my nice clothes, are in a shopping bag,
like a paper shopping bag. Underwear bras that work with it,
like a black one piece sheery bra. Thing like the
full nine satin shoes, rhyin stone heels with the wrap
around and you have to like unbuckle them. Like So
(09:19):
now it's the end of the day in a in
a middle school that I think might also be a
high school, and I'm trying to find a bathroom, and
there's no men's women there's no men's bathroom, there's no
women's bathroom. There's like a human bathroom, just only a
human bathroom. And soon they're gonna have to be called
hugh women because you can't call it human. So just
a every every being bathroom. So there's an every being bathroom.
(09:42):
And it's just one bathroom in this whole hallway, and
it's got all these stalls and here I and here,
I am like it's this chiffon dress, and I'm changing
from sweatpants and on one of the breaks when like
there's a break, like a time out, that's when I'm
running down the hall and paul And is still in
the gymnasium, so there's still a presence from our family
there to see Brant and I'm down the hall, my
(10:03):
assistants helping me because she kept it. She came, she
came back with my stuff, and I'm just I'm just disgusting.
I'm on the floor, my dresses on the floor. I'm
in a public bathroom at the end of a school
day changing for a black tie event. Forget what I
feel like in my sweaty face after being a sweaty
gymnasium and the hair and like I just can never
do it. So it's polished, Like I look at the
(10:24):
celebrities and they show up on those red carpets and
it's just polished, and mine's always like some pit stained
mess where like I they may think I look fine,
but I've been through a fucking war before I get there.
But guess what, I didn't miss one minute of the game.
I got my black tie down on and I was
out the goddamn door. With my shopping bag filled with
(10:45):
my sweatpants and made it. I did it for Brin
and she saw me the entire time, and she saw
at the end when I had like a gown on
and with a sweater over trying to cover it up,
and I think she really appreciated it. And we got
to the event right on time, and it was an
amazing cause. And like I did it, I just want
to make a note about one thing that I do
not approve of. So you know, we're in the land
(11:07):
of everybody did a great job, and everybody's good and
supporting them, and you know, they still realize they're not stupid.
They realize if they're good, if they're bad, if they're
on a team with people that are pulling the rest
of the team down, if you know, they're just being
given you know, the token ribbon or time playing because
you know, it's middle school and we're not yet you know,
being relentless in how cutthroat we are about sports. But
(11:32):
you know, they have the cheers do it again, Britain,
do it again, you know, after they after they serve,
and they're so rara and everybody's so happy in between
each thing. And yeah, but no, it's okay, did a
great job, don't worry. And everybody's so supportive. I'm gonna
tell you what's not supportive. The opposing team. Every single
time they got a point, Every single time they got
(11:53):
a point on the other team, it was a double
a double clap, a double snap and under the knee. Yeah,
a clap, and so fine, if if we won the game,
let's do a triple clap and under the thing. Great
if if you know, if somebody served and both got
in and that's a special occasion and both both serves
(12:14):
got a point, and that's like a rock star. Okay,
the double snap underneath whatever ra Ross is spoonba. Fine,
every fucking time somebody got a point on the other team,
our team doesn't do that. They just they got a
point and yeah we got a point. Yeah, great job.
You know, Linda wonderful, Like there's a fucking Linda in school.
(12:34):
There's not. It's not a Linda or account, but Linda
for the sake of this discussion. Okay, So the other team,
every we got a point on you funk yourself. Like
every time we we did it, we got it. We know,
we can read, we see the board. You don't have
to shove it up our ass and down our throat,
like every time you get a point. I'm not for that.
So if you work at a school, you're a parent,
(12:54):
you have a team, you're a coach, whatever, you don't
need to do it. You don't need to do a
big fucking dance every time we're getting funked up. Tonight,
we got a point, Like every time we don't just
do it. A couple of dances goes a long way.
You don't need to like troll. That's taunting and trolling.
(13:15):
We were like, I was like ready to be in there,
like enough, we get it. You got another point. It's ridiculous.
I don't like that.
So Instagram, I guess people were crashing and people were
losing followers. And I saw one person, I think it
was Perez Hilton said that he lost five thousand followers
but they were all bots. And he said Instagram sucks anyway,
and that TikTok is the only platform that's relevant, it's alive, etcetera.
(00:34):
I don't agree with that. I think that all of
the platforms have things that are positive and negative about them.
For me, Twitters where you go to just like throw
a comment, fire a shot, and get into a fist fight,
a verbal fist fight with a bunch of people. Um.
But you also can get like actual news on Twitter
just look at someone's feed or CNNs feed and getting news.
(00:56):
For me, Instagram is where you post fake still photographs
of yourself looking perfect in a slower, more constipated um,
slighter fashion um. But now with reels, I feel like
they've come to play. For me, Instagram feels less of
the wild wild West than TikTok, which feels like you're
(01:17):
walking to a more rocan bizarre and shopping and you
could do really great, but you could also lose a
purse or you know, a hand, So that's how I
feel about TikTok as far as losing followers. I was
excited because I thought that the bots when you were
losing bots, because a lot of people were losing followers,
which translated into them being bots. I thought that all
(01:38):
the boats were probably fake followers, and maybe they are,
but I thought they were bought. I thought boats were bought,
and maybe some of the bots are bought, because if
you go on really famous people's instagrams, you see a
lot of like you gotta try this new financial thing
I did. I made five thousand dollars in two days,
or viagra or diet pills, and there there's like it
(02:00):
can be hundreds in a row, and they're sort of
talking to each other. And I don't understand where all
the bots come from and what they're doing. Besides if
they're advertising something, I get it. But bot trolls to
just troll you. What is their function? Who's hired them?
Like there are people that will come on and troll
me that have two followers and it's like a new
It always as user one to three on TikTok or something,
(02:20):
and I don't know where they are, and then you
look and they have three followers, and they say the
nastiest stuff. So it feels like if they say nasty stuff,
it's coming from some being who wants to say something
nasty to me. So I don't know where that. I
don't know where that comes from. But Facebook is still
the biggest of all of them, and Instagram is still next,
I mean by follower users worldwide. So and Instagram is
(02:42):
coming in. Instagram came in and knocked off Snapchat, which
was massive at the time with stories. We all forget that.
We all forget that that the biggest yogurt was fa
j In Greek yogurt until Chobani came. We all forget that.
You know, years ago, Steve's ice Cream was a little
place putting ice cream on slabs in Great Neck and
(03:04):
mixing top fixings into it until cold Stone Creamery. We
all forget that there were ten thousand spinning places until
soul Cycle came into the mix. So Instagram came in
hot and became Snapchat with the stories, but they weren't
doing it first. So Instagram is now coming for TikTok
with reels. They have more money. They have more money,
(03:24):
so let's not sleep on Instagram. That's all I have
to say, but back to the original matter at hand,
why can't Instagram have a breakdown and people with fake
followers get outed? Because I thought that these bots meant
that all the people with fake followers that they were
being caught with their pants down, and that was rather
exciting to me because I have seen so many articles
(03:46):
in Harper's Bazaar and readers Digest in crepytable um outlets.
That's say that so many people that have millions of followers,
a massive percentage of them are not real. You can
look this up at anytime, and there are companies that
will go look it up. And now I have not
I have bought followers to everybody does um Apparently who
(04:08):
has a lot of followers people that are not that
that doesn't mean they're bought because mine are not bought,
but they could be boughts. I don't know where they
come from. Someone else to educate me on that too,
But apparently if someone is more than twenty five of
their followers are not real, then they're bought. So I
think it's a confusing thing, and I think I welcome
Instagram flushing through people's bought followers. I mean, I would
(04:34):
love to see one of these, one of these massive
multibillion dollar platforms, come through and clean house properly. If
you're gonna take out bots, take out bots. We want
bots and bots gone. We want everything that's not legit
because people what about just like moms that are posting
pictures of their cats and dogs and Halloween costumes, et cetera.
(04:55):
And you know, they don't even know that it's not
even what I mean. If anybody can buy followers, the
whole thing is is a scam. If anybody can buy followers,
then the brands that are paying these famous people are
paying for what's a scam. They're paying to promote their
product two bots. And also these celebrities have gotten brand
(05:20):
deals because of their followers. They've gotten more followers because
of the media about their initial followers, so that's a
scam too. It's just endless. Social media has so many
places to scam, whether you're filtering your face to make
you look like nothing you actually look like, whether you're
pretending you have this following based on bots and bots,
it's just all such a fucking scam, and it's so
(05:43):
disheartening because people are just posting pictures of like costumes
and their dogs and their life, wanting to just compete
in this space that already isn't fair because celebrities run
social media, so now it's even more not fair because
you can just buy it. And I, you know, I
understand exactly why people would buy followers. It's so easy,
you know. I mean, I would have ten million followers
(06:04):
if I had bought followers in the beginning and just thought,
who fucking cares? Because there are articles everywhere no one cares.
You get no credit for doing the right thing. I
get no credit for not filtering my face and then
you end up looking older than everybody. You get no
credit for not buying followers because then you just like
the loser who has you know, not a lot of followers.
(06:24):
It's just historic. You get no credit for not wanting
to post yourself in a fucking thong, because that's how
you get followers is to be like sexualize everything and
be like, look how good and sexy I look, and
how fake I look. It's just all the circular reference
of bullshit. So if I put a thong on and
filter myself and get you know, fake gass and and
(06:45):
and and have fake followers, then I'll be winning in
the celebrity landscape. You can fucking keep it. All I'm
saying is pull everyone's pants down. No filters, no fake followers,
Let's fucking do real. Yesterday I went to my daughter's
(07:11):
last volleyball game. She played the entire game. Um, it
was at a it was an away game at another school,
and Paul and I had an event for the Holocaust Museum,
a charity event, and I told him he would go,
we would go, and his parents were going. And it
involves the hair and the makeup and the dress and
the whole thing. And Brent's last volleyball game. And I
(07:32):
go to all her games and it means something to her.
And I made this rule that I would not miss
the meaningful things. It kills me to miss them. I
think those are really important things. Just the look on
my daughter's face every time she did something great, she
caught something like I would, you know, And you don't
want to be on your phone. You want to be
really engaged, because you see every time she passed a ball,
or when she served perfectly, but then somebody else, one
(07:53):
of her teammates, maybe didn't didn't nail it. And just
so I know that even though they lost the point
that I saw how well she did and I love
and at the end it was like, I know, I
saw everything. You killed it, you did well because she
happened to have a really great game. Um, and I changed.
And then the game was late. It was forty minutes.
They started late because of the kids before. I'm not
gonna like carrying it up and go to the freaking
(08:14):
other school, be like, we gotta get the game on
the road. I have a charity event at Chippy Eye
Ballroom where you know, rich Jewish people are, you know,
donating to a very important cause. It just doesn't feel
like it's gonna land at the fucking volleyball game. And
you know, in middle school. So I'm sweating. I'm freaking out.
We've got to an inexpensive hotel room to change in
(08:35):
in between the volleyball game and the thing, because I
didn't want embarrass her and be like a black tie
down in a sweaty hot middle school gymnasium. Oh my god,
lo and behold, I'm like, we're not gonna make it.
We're not gonna make it. We're not gonna make it.
We're gonna be late to the thing. Then the whole
purpose of us going to this thing is defeated. Now
we've wasted money, even though a little bit of money
(08:56):
for that hotel room. And I'm like, what are we
gonna do? So I'm like, we gotta change here. So
all my clothes, my nice clothes, are in a shopping bag,
like a paper shopping bag. Underwear bras that work with it,
like a black one piece sheery bra. Thing like the
full nine satin shoes, rhyin stone heels with the wrap
around and you have to like unbuckle them. Like So
(09:19):
now it's the end of the day in a in
a middle school that I think might also be a
high school, and I'm trying to find a bathroom, and
there's no men's women there's no men's bathroom, there's no
women's bathroom. There's like a human bathroom, just only a
human bathroom. And soon they're gonna have to be called
hugh women because you can't call it human. So just
a every every being bathroom. So there's an every being bathroom.
(09:42):
And it's just one bathroom in this whole hallway, and
it's got all these stalls and here I and here,
I am like it's this chiffon dress, and I'm changing
from sweatpants and on one of the breaks when like
there's a break, like a time out, that's when I'm
running down the hall and paul And is still in
the gymnasium, so there's still a presence from our family
there to see Brant and I'm down the hall, my
(10:03):
assistants helping me because she kept it. She came, she
came back with my stuff, and I'm just I'm just disgusting.
I'm on the floor, my dresses on the floor. I'm
in a public bathroom at the end of a school
day changing for a black tie event. Forget what I
feel like in my sweaty face after being a sweaty
gymnasium and the hair and like I just can never
do it. So it's polished, Like I look at the
(10:24):
celebrities and they show up on those red carpets and
it's just polished, and mine's always like some pit stained
mess where like I they may think I look fine,
but I've been through a fucking war before I get there.
But guess what, I didn't miss one minute of the game.
I got my black tie down on and I was
out the goddamn door. With my shopping bag filled with
(10:45):
my sweatpants and made it. I did it for Brin
and she saw me the entire time, and she saw
at the end when I had like a gown on
and with a sweater over trying to cover it up,
and I think she really appreciated it. And we got
to the event right on time, and it was an
amazing cause. And like I did it, I just want
to make a note about one thing that I do
not approve of. So you know, we're in the land
(11:07):
of everybody did a great job, and everybody's good and
supporting them, and you know, they still realize they're not stupid.
They realize if they're good, if they're bad, if they're
on a team with people that are pulling the rest
of the team down, if you know, they're just being
given you know, the token ribbon or time playing because
you know, it's middle school and we're not yet you know,
being relentless in how cutthroat we are about sports. But
(11:32):
you know, they have the cheers do it again, Britain,
do it again, you know, after they after they serve,
and they're so rara and everybody's so happy in between
each thing. And yeah, but no, it's okay, did a
great job, don't worry. And everybody's so supportive. I'm gonna
tell you what's not supportive. The opposing team. Every single
time they got a point, Every single time they got
(11:53):
a point on the other team, it was a double
a double clap, a double snap and under the knee. Yeah,
a clap, and so fine, if if we won the game,
let's do a triple clap and under the thing. Great
if if you know, if somebody served and both got
in and that's a special occasion and both both serves
(12:14):
got a point, and that's like a rock star. Okay,
the double snap underneath whatever ra Ross is spoonba. Fine,
every fucking time somebody got a point on the other team,
our team doesn't do that. They just they got a
point and yeah we got a point. Yeah, great job.
You know, Linda wonderful, Like there's a fucking Linda in school.
(12:34):
There's not. It's not a Linda or account, but Linda
for the sake of this discussion. Okay, So the other team,
every we got a point on you funk yourself. Like
every time we we did it, we got it. We know,
we can read, we see the board. You don't have
to shove it up our ass and down our throat,
like every time you get a point. I'm not for that.
So if you work at a school, you're a parent,
(12:54):
you have a team, you're a coach, whatever, you don't
need to do it. You don't need to do a
big fucking dance every time we're getting funked up. Tonight,
we got a point, Like every time we don't just
do it. A couple of dances goes a long way.
You don't need to like troll. That's taunting and trolling.
(13:15):
We were like, I was like ready to be in there,
like enough, we get it. You got another point. It's ridiculous.
I don't like that.
Host
Bethenny Frankel
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I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy And Charlamagne Tha God!
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.