May 4, 2022 • 45 mins
Brendan and his friend Danielle Henderson seek out the je ne sais quoi of the Québécois. Along the way, they learn about the Quiet Revolution, French-Canadian celebrity mags, and local pastries known as “nun’s farts.” Brendan, determined to make his new travel podcast as creative as possible, seeks help from Leonard Cohen’s ghost, while Danielle hides from Montreal’s sub-zero temperatures in a Nordic Spa, where she discovers a masseuse who puts the therapist in massage therapy.
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Speaker 1 (00:15):
Pushkin. What are you doing? I'm shaving my chin hears.
What is that thing? It looks like a little magic
marker for princesses. It's like supposed to be used for
bikini shaving. There was shape. I didn't know that women
had those. We have a lot of secrets, man, We
(00:37):
got a lot of tools in the tool belt. That's
a tool for below the tool belt. I'm got in
my case because when when I go out of my house,
I can actually see my chin hairs in a better
mirror than the one I have in my house. And
I'll hit up a hotel and I'll turn on the
magnified mirror and be like, oh, there's the forest of hairs,
and I'll shave them all. This is the unvarnished travel show.
(00:57):
I haven't wear makeup, but I will shave a chin here.
This is not Lost Look Amazing only wears overalls and jumpsuits.
Now the travel show about going places, define yourself. Each week,
(01:19):
a friend and I go to a new place and
try to get invited to someone's house for dinner. I
feel like you were the turtle back on part. That's
been my signature mood. I'm Brendan Francis Newnham are somehow
and that's my friend Daniel Henderson as there's no boots. Man.
We've just met up at Trudeau Airport. Staring at the
people coming out of the plane. They look Canadian. I
(01:42):
think they would just look like us, but they don't.
They look better. They look like they have healthcare. Episode
one Montreal, we're gonna I think calves are this way?
See that? Oh my god, freezing. Why did we come
to Montreal in the dead of winter. Well, because most
(02:09):
travel shows would come here in Springer's fall. Yeah, I
mean you're talking to someone who flew in from Los Angeles.
I have a bag with my Burgenstocks handles in it
because that's what I was wearing this morning. But I
wanted like authentic Montreal man, Like I think, like this
what separates the Canadian wheat from the Canadian chap. So
we need to establish on this ride that your TV writer,
(02:33):
I am a like audio journalist person and we're both single.
We're on the wrong set of thirty five. We're looking
for connection, creative meaning a hand to hold in this mad,
mad world. My only plan was to get on a
plane and show up. It's rad to see you, and
I think we're gonna have fun. So basically I need
(02:54):
to do this travel pod thing. We also have some
people were going to meet, very excited, and I would
like to hopefully insinuate herself into someone's home to have dinner,
because I feel like that's the real way to meet them.
When you say it like that, I can't imagine anyone
else turning, anyone turning us down. I'd like to insinuate
myself into your hole. Um, I'm gonna switch Mike's, so
(03:15):
don't say anything interesting. Where are you all from? Okay?
I'm from New York. Okay. So that there is the
Olympic Stadium. Yeah, and you will see we are actually
on an island, which is uh, you know, butch all
is cool because we you know, we we are like
(03:38):
Americans without the baggage. We can watch and look kind
of laugh because we're across the border, but we're the same.
Like you might even think I'm from Jersey. I thought
you were from Jersey. What I mean, that's what an
anglophone Quebecer sounds like. Can you say quintessential Quebecer anglophone sentence?
(03:59):
All right, let's go get some put in Oh you
try or smoked meat? All right? Did you get some
bagels yet? Yeah? What about what about of you're just
talking to your family or friends on a Sunday. Well,
since I have three teenagers, I don't talk much to
them because they're they're teenagers. But here you'll notice all
(04:19):
the signs that we have around. They're all French. But
if you notice, there will be some participate in English.
But they have to be. This is a law. A
third of the size. We've got the office d lallon
fan the French police. Yeah, go around and go into
(04:43):
your establishment and measure your sign and make sure you're
comfort Oh yeah, we've we've tried to seceed from Canada.
What time it was real close? I was like, I
think forty nine fifty one. It was like every all
the the head offices and companies just up and left,
and the wealth left, and so what remained was nice, beautiful,
(05:06):
easy to live, lovable Montreal. This is it. My tour
has had the car. I don't, but I'm uber, Daryl,
I thank you. Watch yourself in the eyes. You're welcome
to grab my arm here for these icy regions. Here's
(05:27):
where it gets treacherous, though, because now it's snow on
top of ice. I think you just have to walk
like an old person your entire walk. I just want
to point out that a small child ran past us
like she was just walking on grass, just fully ran
past us while we take our old bones down this street.
(05:51):
In my high school yearbook caption, I wrote a message
to my unrequited crush. It said, dear E, our artists
loft in Canada waits. I'd never even been to Canada
or a loft, but somehow I'd gotten this idea that
it was a place for culture, romance, an affordable real estate,
three things I still long for. He's married now with
(06:12):
two kids, but at least I made it to Canada.
I'll be it in the dead of winter with my friend.
Oh my gosh, there's a cat cafe ten feet from
our door. That's insane. Danielle and I drop off our
bags and head to the Museum of Fine Arts. As
good a place as I need to learn about Montreal's
creative roots. So it was a city where it was
(06:33):
like much more important to be a sculptor than a doctor.
That is really cool, whatever that is. They saw it
last time I was here. My name is Heather O'Neill,
and I'm a local Montreal author. These look kind of
like Jacometti's a little bit right, yeah, like with the
skinny elongated limbs. This is Louis Arschambau. He has sculptures
and parks too. I believe this is like such a style.
(06:54):
I always liked it, but my dad would try and
show me like this is crap. I love the idea
of been bringing you to all these works of public
art just to point out how horrible they are, terrible
phony fony. So we're making our way into the Quebec
Arts Pavilion. You're not a historian. You're not responsible to
explain all this to us. If you read anything you
(07:15):
encounter the Quiet Revolution? Is there a way to summarize
that pretty quickly? The kind of what that was? All? Right? Here,
I go, okay, we'll just go to the sixties when
it started all the sort of good jobs in Montreal,
and all the executive jobs were held by English speaking people,
(07:35):
and a lot of the companies were they were all
owned by anglophones and they would only give English speaking
citizens the jobs. And then what happened was there began
to be a cultural movement where they decided we're just
going to overthrow this predicament we're in so French class. Yeah,
(08:01):
the lower class Francophones were like, this is just enough.
One of the big movements was they made education all
the universities free, So you ended up with this like
massive class of young people who came from working class
backgrounds but were incredibly educated and so obviously that created
like radical thinking. So we're in this permanent exhibit called
(08:23):
the Age of the Manifesto. Do you recognize any of
these Oh, yeah, this is real pal who Yeah, is
sort of our Jackson Pollock. He's incredibly well regarded in Quebec.
Even someone myself came from as lower class as you
get in the city, I still went to McGill University
and had like a top rate education and then was,
(08:43):
you know, kind of thrown back on the street corner.
I was like, what do I do? I've just read
a lot of Henry James. So there's this kind of
irony and there's a humor when you're able to suddenly
talk about your odd, down and out predicament, but in
the language of m and so then it becomes everything
(09:07):
kind of becomes like tongue in cheek an absurd and
you kind of have this like Beckett, like feeling well,
thanks so much for meeting us today. That's what's what's
going on tonight? What are you up to? Oh um?
I have like a deadline. I'm asking because we're kind
(09:28):
of trying to get invited to a dinner party, because
it's a place where you can genuinely get to know
people instead of just being tourists. You know, I would
love that, but I have like a Chihuahua who is
aggressive towards the stranger dogs, but it would just over
overwhelm him. I think, Okay, I'm sorry, like it seems rude.
(09:49):
I know everyone Canadians are nice, but apparently they're no.
But if you bring people by dogs going to bite someone, okay,
that would not be a good outcome. But you have
healthcare for those people. What is your dog's name, Hamlet.
(10:11):
I don't spend as much time thinking about how I'm
going to die alone when I'm traveling, but I get
to travel with someone I love. Oh see, I love
you too, and also we get to eat as much
everything there. I love you too. Mine's a lot of
therapy bills behind that you're so white. I love it.
It's nice. It's nice to kind of it is nice
(10:31):
to travel with. Buddy. This is Arion Saint Laurent. Thank you.
When my last radio show ended fairly abruptly, I was
a little concerned about your mental health. Yeah I was.
I was a little bit lost. You know. I went
from having this rad show where I spoke with Nilde
Grass Tyson and Scarlett Johansson to my Deli guy being
(10:56):
the only person I spoke to on any given day. Yeah,
but now at this show, trying to get myself back
out there, Dude, isn't exciting. Let's play a game, like,
let's just name what comes to mind when we think
of Montreal. I definitely think of poutine, of course, Letter Cohen,
I think you guys, they're everywhere. There is just that
(11:19):
kind of French like undercount where you're like, la la,
What is this like an eighties perfume commercial? Please never
say that to a woman here. I want her to
say it to me. I can never remember who founded Montreal,
(11:48):
whether it was Samuel de Champlain or Jacquet, but what
a fucking idiot like I mean, we're only a six
hour drive from New York that's comedian writer actress Trana Winter.
We're at a restaurant called Lawrence, which is a fitting name.
If this place was a human, it'd be that fancy
kid who dresses like a carefree hemian Lawrence. I try
(12:12):
and fail to tuck a napkin into my cashmere turtleneck.
Montreal winters are not glamorous. It's really hard to be glamorous.
Sorry to be glamorous, like crampons on your boots. Yeah, oh,
here we go, let's cheers. What do you say, salteea?
But I love living here. Yeah. Here. It's the last
(12:35):
remaining affordable North American metropolis. Um. I live in a
one bedroom apartment like smack in the middle of everything,
and it's six hundred dollars a month six hundred Canadian
so that's like four eighty Americans. Yeah. The other thing
that I love about it is just there's just this
(12:56):
sexy vibe and Montreal this pulse, this energy. But I
don't fully know how to articulate, but it's here. I've
been hornys it's the minute I live. There is this
sensuality to it, There is this kind of verve, and
I don't I just think like, oh, it's European, which
is my catchall term for any kind of these. That's
part of it. I think part of it too is
(13:18):
just it is a diverse city, you know, but I
don't think that's special anymore. That's sort of seems to
is that when I travel alone as a black woman,
I feel like that's something that I notice right away
if I feel comfortable or not right, and there are
still some places where I just don't right for sure
at all. Thank you on top you have a little
(13:40):
salad of fresh hurricane Billy gals and coins. That's my
renated enjoying thank you just looks so good. Well, the
things that I like about it, though, I feel like
you're trying here, Like there's a cultural identity that people
are not willing to just roll over and let things happen. Yeah,
that's true, especially on the French side. French side is
very much about protecting their culture. Actually just started to
(14:04):
do comedy in French because I am bilingual. Is there
different things that French people find funny? In Quebec Actually
there's something called Le Calm, which is comedy school. Basically. Okay,
like nine percent of French or Francophone comedians in Quebec
have gone through this school class one is like did
you ever notice, right, yeah, freshman year, and so there
(14:27):
is kind of like this uniformity in terms of comedy style.
So also out of necessity, there is this Quebec star system,
like Quebec has its own Hollywood that doesn't exist anywhere
else because it can't exist anywhere else, it doesn't translate.
But now that I've started performing in French, it's like,
that's become my new dream. You're gonna be a part of,
(14:48):
like the Quebec Star system. I'm like that. My dream
has always been to make it just so I can
be a hasban. What's it called if you never did
anything to be washed up? I never was, like I
never Yeah, you're not as you're never gu So I
(15:14):
got divorced five years ago and I met my ex
husband on an internet comic book forum in the late nineties. Wow,
and he was like my best friend and he was
part of my memory and my heart and I lost
that and I lost all of my confidence. I have
not been on a date or been in a relationship
since then. I've had sex once, no, twice twice in
(15:38):
the past four years. Oh really, Yeah, it's been very
difficult to admit to myself that, like I'm interested now
in being with someone in a real way again, like
sharing my life with them. You're afraid to be We
think we all are vulnerable. Yeah, I don't have too vulnerability.
I've known you for a while and we've pooped around
(15:59):
and traveled a lot, like you do have an appetite
for just like some freewheel and love through. I was
sad a lot whatever Jim Hudson in the seventies. Why
do you want to get laid? But also you're such
a I don't know, you have such a nurturing instinct
and you're you're I hear you're one. I don't know.
I'm not there now of that instinct because I don't
(16:20):
want to take care of man. And it sucks that
the result of that is that I might have to
be alone because that bob is the thought of being
alone bother you though, no me either. It doesn't bother me.
It's only like when I want to get late and
I can't. I don't know how people do it. It
bothers me. It bothers me, it does yeah, um super
in the cuddling, I like I like I like cooking
(16:42):
breakfast half naked like that, I would really take care
of my like, nah, huddling affection. No, how's your drink.
That's great, got some gin and some lime and some booze.
It's good. It looks like I got colder outside in
the time we were eating. I'm a little scared. Yeah,
(17:05):
but you know Montreal, like even in like the most
insane winter weather, you can always count on one asshole
to be on their bike, still going. I'm telling you,
in a blizzard, in a blizzard in the weather, let's
be career street sweepers here, Like there's so much snow
so long. Absolutely, and as a warning before the plows come,
(17:28):
they have these toe chucks driving around blaring this insane siren.
Oh it's not a cop siren, it's not a fire truck,
it's its own unit. It's a plows Far the fuck
out of your siren. So what are you doing this weekend?
What are the plans? Um? I mean, my weekends are
(17:48):
always kind of up in the air. I'm as you know,
I'm very noncommittal a party to go to. You're looking
for a dinner party? I mean, I like you guys,
Let's play it by ear. Is that the name of
your next comedy album? Maybe? Maybe? Yeah? Oh for two
(18:12):
in our dinner party search, or rather point five for
two since China did say maybe. Back at our lodgings,
we brush our teeth, tuck ourselves in, and uploads like
photos to Instagram. Eventually I drift off to sleep with
dreams of six hundred dollars rent going through my head.
(18:48):
Oh my god, let's get coffee. Whoa that is a style.
Guy's got like a slicked back, moosed ponytail. I mean
it is morning, and I'm surprisingly still horny for a
rontreal mosaba suble years. All right, you show me up.
(19:12):
You speak French, I don't May I have one of
these with the feta. Yeah, Rusty and I will have
a latte in your largest to go cup. So today
we're gonna go to the Jean to Lawn market, this
food market with this woman Massam who's a food blogger,
because you know, we gotta get our food for one
(19:32):
one gotta get it some snacks. But I was thinking
to get started, we should go to Leonard Cohen's home
because he's this city's like favorite son. Is it a
museum now or that he's dead or is it just
his house. It's not a museum, and it's kind of
I'm not even one hundred percent positive where it is.
It's like, I know it's on this park to Portugal.
I don't know. I just think there might be a
clue for me up there. Yeah. I mean, you have
(19:54):
to go with your heart, go where your heart leads you.
My heart is leading me to get a massage on
a boat, really, because I think it gets you into
the spirit of well, I don't know. I was gonna
bullshit something about how it gets you into the spirit
of the city, but it's just entirely selfish and I
like feeling good. All right, Well, I'm just gonna take off.
I guess I feel weird abandoning you at this stage
(20:16):
of the game. Look, we're both adults. I'm gonna let
you go stand outside, let her Cohen's house like a creep,
and I'm gonna go get a massage, all right, Helena,
how goes? And if you get arrested, I'll bail you out.
Thank you. Excuse me, I'm looking for Leonard Cohen's house.
(20:41):
A Cohen I'm looking for. Excuse me? Is it your
first time here? Wonderful, well, welcome, very excited to see
what a spa on a river has to offer. And
it's so wonderful. I think it's like parked to Portugal
(21:04):
or something. Oh yeah, you just have to like keep
walking a little bit, turned right and up a few
blocks and me get all right. But there's not like
a sign or anything that says that's where I used
to live. No, no, no, okay, it's fucking freezing out here.
This is one of our saunas Lord of ceiling windows.
(21:26):
Looking over the port. This is unreal jacouzy hot tubs
we call them ba. I cannot get over this. And
this is filled with eucalyptus. Normally I want to live
in this. You're gonna head down to the first stack,
can go for your musage. I'm ready. You're in the bathtub.
Ah fuck, Oh my goodness. You're a very gentle touch.
(21:57):
I'm going through the scar tissue, because we have scar
tissue that builds up in muscles that are oversolicited. You
use your body in different ways in such a treme
tempers and so I'm wondering if that contributes to you
seeing certain types of ailments are over and over again,
or what I see a lot of is definitely low
(22:20):
back and more low back tension which crawls up front
because we're huddled, you know, we're trying to keep ourselves warm,
We're trying to keep centered so that we can navigate
the ice and the snow and the slush and the
puddles and the roads. It's really the march of the
penguins in the winter here, I mean, and you you're
going to see that today, and your guys are going
(22:40):
to giggle to yourselves and you say, yeah, there's the penguins. Yeah,
I see them, you know. And it's because we're so
afraid to fall like a bird on the wire, like
a drunk in the mid night choir. I have tried
(23:01):
in my way to be free. Thank you. Well, this
is it? Just a gray Stone one two three triplex,
(23:24):
pretty non the script, you know, he's sang about religion
and sex and poets and history, and it's weird just
to see a gray house on a little park with
a Honda Civic parked out front of it. I'm not
(23:49):
really sure why I thought it was so important to
come here. All right, it's icy, it's cold, and I
think that's the bigel place he would go to. It's
(24:10):
kind of strange to realize how powerful and healing touch
can be because I don't I don't date, I don't
kind of like engage in that way anymore. And so
I was alone for thirteen years after my divorce and
I met I met someone. What I came to understand
(24:31):
about myself is what stops me from dating is how
well can I hide my wounds? Right? So, my you know,
current partner and I we decided are the philosophy of
our relationship is no masks, full disclosure. So I think
it's about really deciding to have to have that level
of honesty within yourself and the trusting. But when you've
(24:53):
had trauma, trust is so fragile. Yeah. So, so one
of my my big trauma is that my mom left.
She she dropped us off at my grandparents' house for
a weekend and then never came back. And the person
(25:15):
who's supposed to love you and conditionally leaves, and that
will mess you up well because you're gonna always asking
yourself what did I do wrong? Right? And will I
do something wrong again? But what will I do to
make someone leave? Because the assumption is that somebody will
always leave a lot of tension in your calves. Yeah,
(25:41):
but you spoke of your herniated disks so often warm
that up for you. So when you go out and
do the March of the Penguins, you feel a little
more ease in your body. Thank you, Lujenie. What are
you up to this weekend? Because you know Brendon and
I are in town and we're kind of looking for
(26:01):
dinner parties. He's making me ask everyone if we can
eat at their house. Basically, Oh, well, that's unfortunate. I
would love to normally have to meet at my house. However,
I am going on from back. Um, could I just
get a what would you order? Bagel? Bagel with locks? Ye?
(26:25):
Mercy visiting town? How do you know? I'm visiting? Guidebooks?
Kind of a giveaway? Let me guess. Larry Cohen's house.
It doesn't even have a plaque. I just feel like
if that was in America, there would be there would
be an amusement park around, like a Suzanne roller coaster,
like a Leonard Wood. Yeah, they would be selling like
(26:48):
my blue raincoats or something for toddler's right. Maybe that's
a good idea an get out on that. Yeah, I'm Brendon.
By the way, Brendan Francis knew, and I'm doing a
travel podcast thing here. Oh okay, I'm Tim Kingsbury and
I live in the neighborhood cool. I used to have
this podcast you might have heard of called The Dinner
Party Download. Well, I don't know that one, okay, yeah,
(27:10):
I mean it was mostly America. Are you a fan
of Cohen? Yeah, definitely, Like I moved here just to
play music myself. Actually, so you're a musician, yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah right. Uh, what kind of hole does he have on?
Kind of Montreal? Like some imagination, he's everywhere. There's like
(27:30):
a big mural downtown since he since he passed away,
and everyone's got a Leonard Cohen story or he's he's
he's everywhere. Do you do you have a Leonard Cohen story? Uh?
I used to work at a grocery store just down
the road called Warshaw and I was like a bag
boy there and he came in one time and bought
some bananas, just bananas. I think there were bagels too.
(27:54):
That sounds very freudy, and actually that's what I imagined.
Leonard Cohen. Yeah, no, he remember, he was he thought
they were overpriced, and he was right. They were nice.
Nice talking to you. I gotta get going. Oh, by
the way, what what's the name of the band you're in?
Arcade Fire? H is? Is there anything going on tonight? Uh?
(28:20):
I think I'm actually getting out of town and I'm
gonna go up north. Um. Maybe are your friends doing it? Like?
Are your friends doing anything like they out? Uh? Yeah,
they're probably doing something there. We all thank you, thanks,
(28:50):
thank you so much for driving us here. We're getting
dropped off at the city's biggest food markets. So what
should we eat there? Everything? You can't taste everything for free,
in fact, and if you like it, you could buy it.
Thank you. Maybe buying provisions for a dinner party will
deuce a dinner party. Maybe. So nice to meet you. Hey,
(29:12):
I'm Danielle. Nice to meet you, may so. Welcome to
the jan Talent Market. A lot of markets in North
America these days have become sort of a tourist attraction.
They sell a lot of stuff that's not really food.
They sell T shirts and souvenirs and caps. Where's this market?
It's just food, Although we might want to come up
with the T shirt idea while we're here. And we
can make some money. You can't ruin the spirit of
(29:34):
this place. That's so American. Jean Talon, No, no paved
sound delicious. I'm addicted to it. Three of these. Yeah.
MBA is most famous chocolate makers in Montreas. Get a
jar of chocolate sauce. We're going to make friends. The
four generations of Forgers. So his mother, his grandmother, and
(29:56):
her mother before that organic honey. And actually we're standing
right in front of one of my favorite stores, Vice Store.
That's for you and your white people. Vice it up,
white folks, Let's do it. My Caron's with Foi gras inside.
That seems like a French Stonor food. It's really really good.
All right, take the whole trey with me. How about
(30:17):
we buy something instead of you taking the sample tray?
Can I do both? You have such a distinguished mark
commenting on the gentleman's eye brow. Yeah, it's got a
beautiful face. What are you doing later tonight? My friend
is visiting. Then you have the tortier, which is a
typical meatpie in Quebecca. What is the quintessential food Montreal
besides poutine, bagels, besides big maple anything? All right here,
(30:41):
we go trying she's trying a maple tart. Oh yeah,
that is incredible. Are you kidding me? What I need here?
The pets, which literally translated is nun's farts? Why did
(31:08):
I ask? Retract exact amos? See uh hi dough with
butter and brown sugar and they put um some cream
(31:28):
on the on top before cooking it. What does that
have to do with nuns? I don't know. Why do
they call it? It was it was invented. It was
created by nuns, like they were trying to find something
to do with the leftovers. Nuns farts. That's so upsetting,
(31:51):
but I appreciate it. I know I'm very sensitive. So Mazame,
thank you so much for joining us the market. It's
been fun hanging out with you. Now we've got all
these snacks. Do you want to hang out with us?
To name? We throw Donna party in our honor um.
(32:12):
Worst case scenario, you and me at our Airbnb. If
we don't find a dinner party, I'm going to go
out to a restaurant. I mean you hit on the
cheese boy, you mean he hit on them. I said,
I had an interesting face, and then you're like, what
do you do on tonight he was into it La la.
Though It's almost four pm and Montreal's winter sun is
(32:35):
already beginning to set, and our prospects for a dinner
party are dimming as well. Back at our place, things
go from labad to the worse. Daniel's back seizes up
and she might have to abandon our mission altogether. As
I sit at the kitchen table, nibbling on a nunfart,
it strikes me it's going to take a miracle to
turn things around. And where do miracles reside? Well, Mark
(32:59):
Twain said when he visited Montreal, you couldn't throw a
brick in this town without breaking a church window. I'm
with Mark Elsworthy, an architecture buff who works with the
local Ministry of Heritage. So right now we're in the
not Cadam the Bonsacle Chapel. It's the oldest in one
of the oldest churches in Montreal looked dates to the
nineteenth they called the Sailors Church. And my eye is
going immediately to these wonderful boats that are hanging with candles. Yeah,
(33:24):
there's even a cargo ship with containers on it. Oh, yeah,
that is a cargo ship. And so they have two
candles in each of them, green candles, like I kind
of want to. I'm not going to steal them, but
I would hope not. But they feel like someone can't
we instagram it and then start a shop that sells them.
I don't know. I feel even bad taking pictures and churches. No, okay,
you know a harbor town, it's considered usually a honky
(33:47):
punk like red light district and certainly in the Prohibition.
Montreal serve that role to this day, maybe with Americans.
But there's so many churches. It's interesting that there's this.
Caebecers are interesting. On the census, they all still fell
out that they're Roman Catholic and Quebeca has the lowest
church attendants in Canada. Church is really tied into identity
but not practice. Yeah, don't come to the church. They
(34:09):
may have been for grandma's funeral a while back or
maybe not, or you know, but no one does baptisms.
People don't get married in the church. M Are there
any other facets of this chapel or that really that
you're that you like or do you want to point out, well,
we have to light a candle for someone, Oh my god,
actually it should Okay, we could light a candle for
(34:29):
back pain to go away. Yeah, for Danielle who's suffering
a little bit. Okay, good thought. There we are. There,
we are a moment. I usually only light candles a
romantic dinners, but here it could lead to a romantic dinner.
Nobody knows they could. I just felt a pang of
(34:50):
Catholic guilt I when I lit that candle. I did
not light the candle for Danielle's back. I lit the
candle because we need to find a place to eat tonight.
Because the whole point of this show was for us
to learn about the town, but then then get into
someone's home to kind of have a true authentic experience.
(35:12):
And so far, um, we've had a lot of people
are very friendly. But when I've asked him that question,
they've you know, been like, oh, well, maybe contact us later.
And I promised the company paying for this, then I'm
going to get into someone's home. What do you think
it's Saturday night? Even if you just let us in
for ten minutes, could we just after lying in church?
(35:32):
You want to come to my house, I'll confessing to you.
And that's what I wished for when I let the candle.
So if there is a god, you got me on
that one. Okay, Well, can I brought your phone and
then I'll just call my husband? Okay, Um, I think
I don't think. I love that you're paying roaming just
a second. This is Penance. Hello, Um the GISTI eskirt
(36:03):
bounskabis opa my meth playing vain. Let's okay, okay, bye?
So you have to do the dishes and bring wine?
Are you serious? Yeah? He's down. Well I didn't really
(36:24):
give him much choice. Yes, thank you so much. This
is amazing. Hello, come on in? Are you Mark? I
am welcome? Hello? Are you should I just throw this?
(36:46):
He thanks so much for showing you. I am trying.
Have you met Louis whose beautiful house half of a
couple of his? Hello, she's the place I really didn't
think any one we talked to today was gonna come.
I love a surprise. We're doing someone sure, triple Gemini
(37:14):
like Highlie Minogue sculptor who who was also dating the
Leonard Cohens. There are Francophone community elsewhere in Canada that
we bought that the Quebec class store where Danielle hit
on the cheese mon America very handsome. Everyone's handsome like
(37:39):
you were drinking the Peanot noir right eye for me. Okay,
just doesn't really get more montreal than like listening to
Sleen after like a dinner party. Someone didn't pay their titles.
(38:06):
Never leaving is what I'm learning to this podcast. Thank
you for letting us loud enough. Okay, the chorus is
literally just by as play as so you can both
stick along already hit it rale le bas By. This
(38:37):
should be your theme song by Where's driving? But you
(39:09):
can walk up as well. Oh yeah, I mean it's
a bit cold, and yeah, you gotta be caught entering.
I mean we're also we're also to be fair hungover
right now that that doesn't help. But this street will
wind us up to the top of the mountain. And
do people actually come to Mount Royal who live here
love it it is? I guess would be like our
(39:32):
central Park, but it's on a mountain. People are cross
country ski yeah, show snowshoeing. We have a skating rink
on the top. Now we're looking to the east side
of the city, but a lookout is that way? Okay, okay,
(39:54):
be careful on the ice. Oh look at that I've
never seen a snowshoe in action. Oh yeah, what a
weekend like that. We did a lot. We did a lot,
but we were talking about coming as we're coming into
the city, kind of like our love lives and romance
and all this stuff. And I think I'm much more
likely to fall in love with a place than I
(40:14):
am with a person. That's interesting there, it is, there's
a city that you love. We're looking at the downtown,
the Saint Lawrence River. Look at Letter Cohen down there.
You see him. Yeah, there's literally a mural of letter
going down there. Oh my god, I thought you saw
an operation when I was at that Letter Cohne house,
(40:38):
which I honestly did meet a member of Arcade Fire.
You have to believe me. I don't. But it's fine.
I'll play you the tape later if you need that
story to get through the weekend. That's fine being there, honestly, Like,
I'm glad I saw the house, but actually the fact
that it was really not that exciting an anticlimactic in
the sense that it was just someone's home. This is
(40:59):
gonna sound corny, but obviously I've been thinking a lot
about like being an artist or being more creative with
my old show ending, and there's no magical properties to it,
Like even Leonard Cohen just lived in a house and
bought bananas, And it's more about just doing the work
and getting it into the world, you know. But it's
(41:20):
not like me living a certain way will make me
Leonard Cohen or something that's always been the key though
you know that well. I mean, I'm just pretending to
learn it now for the show. I think it is
crazy that Leonard Cohen is staring directly at us. I
think it's crazy that you thought I was talking about
(41:41):
a ghost. Honestly, we didn't go over this, but marijuana
is legal here now and last night did run pretty long,
no comment. You know what I think about when I
look in the skyline now, boyash Boy, you are not
only cheating voyage boy, but you're singing it really poorly.
(42:05):
Boyash Boy, I'm gonna walk that way. I feel free here. No,
I think we'll just fade that the real song into
my singing and people won't notice it. Fun Boy thinks
you're singing a totally different song. I think it's only
(42:26):
going to try to find the lead producer on this.
(43:10):
The pilot episode of Not Lost was the talented Crystal Duhaime.
The show was also produced and written by Me Brendon
Francis Newnham. Our associate producer was Jackson Musker. Special editorial
guidance came from Europert Wintock. The show was sound designed
and mixed by Crystal Duhaime and mastered by Hannas Brown.
A big thanks to my friend and this episode's travel partner,
(43:31):
Daniel Henderson. I highly recommend you check out her memoir
The Ugly Cry. Not Lost as a co production of
Pushkin Industries, Topic Studios and iHeartMedia, and was developed at
Topic Studios. The show's executive producers are me Christy Gressman,
Maria Zuckerman, Lisa Langang, and Latomullott. Production assistance on this
(43:52):
episode also came from Jacob Smith, Amy Gaines and Julia Barton.
Our theme song was created by Alexis Georgiopolis aka arp Voyage.
Voyage appeared courtesy of Desireless. Note this show was recorded
before the pandemic, so a big mercy to everyone we
met up with in Montreal. Writer Heather O'Neill, whose new
(44:12):
book When We Lost Our Heads is out now. Comedian
Tranto Winter the staff at Bota Bota Spa. Tim Kingsbury
of Arcade Fire fact check that one and he wasn't lying.
Also food blogger Maysam Samaha and our dinner party host
Mark and Louie. If you want to peek at our
tinerary or learn about any of our guests, head to
not Lawshow dot com. And if anyone from the Canadian
(44:35):
government is listening to this and they have the power
to grammy citizenship being touched. Oh and here's a trip
we'd like you to take from the comfort of your
own phone or computer. Please head to Apple Podcasts and
rate and review us. I knew you hear it a lot,
but it's a real thing. It would mean so much.
Learn more about Topic Studios at topic studios dot com.
To find more Pushkin podcasts, listen on the iHeartRadio app,
(44:57):
Apple podcast or wherever you listen to podcasts. I'm Brendan
Francis Nunham. Until next time, bon voyage.
Pushkin. What are you doing? I'm shaving my chin hears.
What is that thing? It looks like a little magic
marker for princesses. It's like supposed to be used for
bikini shaving. There was shape. I didn't know that women
had those. We have a lot of secrets, man, We
(00:37):
got a lot of tools in the tool belt. That's
a tool for below the tool belt. I'm got in
my case because when when I go out of my house,
I can actually see my chin hairs in a better
mirror than the one I have in my house. And
I'll hit up a hotel and I'll turn on the
magnified mirror and be like, oh, there's the forest of hairs,
and I'll shave them all. This is the unvarnished travel show.
(00:57):
I haven't wear makeup, but I will shave a chin here.
This is not Lost Look Amazing only wears overalls and jumpsuits.
Now the travel show about going places, define yourself. Each week,
(01:19):
a friend and I go to a new place and
try to get invited to someone's house for dinner. I
feel like you were the turtle back on part. That's
been my signature mood. I'm Brendan Francis Newnham are somehow
and that's my friend Daniel Henderson as there's no boots. Man.
We've just met up at Trudeau Airport. Staring at the
people coming out of the plane. They look Canadian. I
(01:42):
think they would just look like us, but they don't.
They look better. They look like they have healthcare. Episode
one Montreal, we're gonna I think calves are this way?
See that? Oh my god, freezing. Why did we come
to Montreal in the dead of winter. Well, because most
(02:09):
travel shows would come here in Springer's fall. Yeah, I
mean you're talking to someone who flew in from Los Angeles.
I have a bag with my Burgenstocks handles in it
because that's what I was wearing this morning. But I
wanted like authentic Montreal man, Like I think, like this
what separates the Canadian wheat from the Canadian chap. So
we need to establish on this ride that your TV writer,
(02:33):
I am a like audio journalist person and we're both single.
We're on the wrong set of thirty five. We're looking
for connection, creative meaning a hand to hold in this mad,
mad world. My only plan was to get on a
plane and show up. It's rad to see you, and
I think we're gonna have fun. So basically I need
(02:54):
to do this travel pod thing. We also have some
people were going to meet, very excited, and I would
like to hopefully insinuate herself into someone's home to have dinner,
because I feel like that's the real way to meet them.
When you say it like that, I can't imagine anyone
else turning, anyone turning us down. I'd like to insinuate
myself into your hole. Um, I'm gonna switch Mike's, so
(03:15):
don't say anything interesting. Where are you all from? Okay?
I'm from New York. Okay. So that there is the
Olympic Stadium. Yeah, and you will see we are actually
on an island, which is uh, you know, butch all
is cool because we you know, we we are like
(03:38):
Americans without the baggage. We can watch and look kind
of laugh because we're across the border, but we're the same.
Like you might even think I'm from Jersey. I thought
you were from Jersey. What I mean, that's what an
anglophone Quebecer sounds like. Can you say quintessential Quebecer anglophone sentence?
(03:59):
All right, let's go get some put in Oh you
try or smoked meat? All right? Did you get some
bagels yet? Yeah? What about what about of you're just
talking to your family or friends on a Sunday. Well,
since I have three teenagers, I don't talk much to
them because they're they're teenagers. But here you'll notice all
(04:19):
the signs that we have around. They're all French. But
if you notice, there will be some participate in English.
But they have to be. This is a law. A
third of the size. We've got the office d lallon
fan the French police. Yeah, go around and go into
(04:43):
your establishment and measure your sign and make sure you're
comfort Oh yeah, we've we've tried to seceed from Canada.
What time it was real close? I was like, I
think forty nine fifty one. It was like every all
the the head offices and companies just up and left,
and the wealth left, and so what remained was nice, beautiful,
(05:06):
easy to live, lovable Montreal. This is it. My tour
has had the car. I don't, but I'm uber, Daryl,
I thank you. Watch yourself in the eyes. You're welcome
to grab my arm here for these icy regions. Here's
(05:27):
where it gets treacherous, though, because now it's snow on
top of ice. I think you just have to walk
like an old person your entire walk. I just want
to point out that a small child ran past us
like she was just walking on grass, just fully ran
past us while we take our old bones down this street.
(05:51):
In my high school yearbook caption, I wrote a message
to my unrequited crush. It said, dear E, our artists
loft in Canada waits. I'd never even been to Canada
or a loft, but somehow I'd gotten this idea that
it was a place for culture, romance, an affordable real estate,
three things I still long for. He's married now with
(06:12):
two kids, but at least I made it to Canada.
I'll be it in the dead of winter with my friend.
Oh my gosh, there's a cat cafe ten feet from
our door. That's insane. Danielle and I drop off our
bags and head to the Museum of Fine Arts. As
good a place as I need to learn about Montreal's
creative roots. So it was a city where it was
(06:33):
like much more important to be a sculptor than a doctor.
That is really cool, whatever that is. They saw it
last time I was here. My name is Heather O'Neill,
and I'm a local Montreal author. These look kind of
like Jacometti's a little bit right, yeah, like with the
skinny elongated limbs. This is Louis Arschambau. He has sculptures
and parks too. I believe this is like such a style.
(06:54):
I always liked it, but my dad would try and
show me like this is crap. I love the idea
of been bringing you to all these works of public
art just to point out how horrible they are, terrible
phony fony. So we're making our way into the Quebec
Arts Pavilion. You're not a historian. You're not responsible to
explain all this to us. If you read anything you
(07:15):
encounter the Quiet Revolution? Is there a way to summarize
that pretty quickly? The kind of what that was? All? Right? Here,
I go, okay, we'll just go to the sixties when
it started all the sort of good jobs in Montreal,
and all the executive jobs were held by English speaking people,
(07:35):
and a lot of the companies were they were all
owned by anglophones and they would only give English speaking
citizens the jobs. And then what happened was there began
to be a cultural movement where they decided we're just
going to overthrow this predicament we're in so French class. Yeah,
(08:01):
the lower class Francophones were like, this is just enough.
One of the big movements was they made education all
the universities free, So you ended up with this like
massive class of young people who came from working class
backgrounds but were incredibly educated and so obviously that created
like radical thinking. So we're in this permanent exhibit called
(08:23):
the Age of the Manifesto. Do you recognize any of
these Oh, yeah, this is real pal who Yeah, is
sort of our Jackson Pollock. He's incredibly well regarded in Quebec.
Even someone myself came from as lower class as you
get in the city, I still went to McGill University
and had like a top rate education and then was,
(08:43):
you know, kind of thrown back on the street corner.
I was like, what do I do? I've just read
a lot of Henry James. So there's this kind of
irony and there's a humor when you're able to suddenly
talk about your odd, down and out predicament, but in
the language of m and so then it becomes everything
(09:07):
kind of becomes like tongue in cheek an absurd and
you kind of have this like Beckett, like feeling well,
thanks so much for meeting us today. That's what's what's
going on tonight? What are you up to? Oh um?
I have like a deadline. I'm asking because we're kind
(09:28):
of trying to get invited to a dinner party, because
it's a place where you can genuinely get to know
people instead of just being tourists. You know, I would
love that, but I have like a Chihuahua who is
aggressive towards the stranger dogs, but it would just over
overwhelm him. I think, Okay, I'm sorry, like it seems rude.
(09:49):
I know everyone Canadians are nice, but apparently they're no.
But if you bring people by dogs going to bite someone, okay,
that would not be a good outcome. But you have
healthcare for those people. What is your dog's name, Hamlet.
(10:11):
I don't spend as much time thinking about how I'm
going to die alone when I'm traveling, but I get
to travel with someone I love. Oh see, I love
you too, and also we get to eat as much
everything there. I love you too. Mine's a lot of
therapy bills behind that you're so white. I love it.
It's nice. It's nice to kind of it is nice
(10:31):
to travel with. Buddy. This is Arion Saint Laurent. Thank you.
When my last radio show ended fairly abruptly, I was
a little concerned about your mental health. Yeah I was.
I was a little bit lost. You know. I went
from having this rad show where I spoke with Nilde
Grass Tyson and Scarlett Johansson to my Deli guy being
(10:56):
the only person I spoke to on any given day. Yeah,
but now at this show, trying to get myself back
out there, Dude, isn't exciting. Let's play a game, like,
let's just name what comes to mind when we think
of Montreal. I definitely think of poutine, of course, Letter Cohen,
I think you guys, they're everywhere. There is just that
(11:19):
kind of French like undercount where you're like, la la,
What is this like an eighties perfume commercial? Please never
say that to a woman here. I want her to
say it to me. I can never remember who founded Montreal,
(11:48):
whether it was Samuel de Champlain or Jacquet, but what
a fucking idiot like I mean, we're only a six
hour drive from New York that's comedian writer actress Trana Winter.
We're at a restaurant called Lawrence, which is a fitting name.
If this place was a human, it'd be that fancy
kid who dresses like a carefree hemian Lawrence. I try
(12:12):
and fail to tuck a napkin into my cashmere turtleneck.
Montreal winters are not glamorous. It's really hard to be glamorous.
Sorry to be glamorous, like crampons on your boots. Yeah, oh,
here we go, let's cheers. What do you say, salteea?
But I love living here. Yeah. Here. It's the last
(12:35):
remaining affordable North American metropolis. Um. I live in a
one bedroom apartment like smack in the middle of everything,
and it's six hundred dollars a month six hundred Canadian
so that's like four eighty Americans. Yeah. The other thing
that I love about it is just there's just this
(12:56):
sexy vibe and Montreal this pulse, this energy. But I
don't fully know how to articulate, but it's here. I've
been hornys it's the minute I live. There is this
sensuality to it, There is this kind of verve, and
I don't I just think like, oh, it's European, which
is my catchall term for any kind of these. That's
part of it. I think part of it too is
(13:18):
just it is a diverse city, you know, but I
don't think that's special anymore. That's sort of seems to
is that when I travel alone as a black woman,
I feel like that's something that I notice right away
if I feel comfortable or not right, and there are
still some places where I just don't right for sure
at all. Thank you on top you have a little
(13:40):
salad of fresh hurricane Billy gals and coins. That's my
renated enjoying thank you just looks so good. Well, the
things that I like about it, though, I feel like
you're trying here, Like there's a cultural identity that people
are not willing to just roll over and let things happen. Yeah,
that's true, especially on the French side. French side is
very much about protecting their culture. Actually just started to
(14:04):
do comedy in French because I am bilingual. Is there
different things that French people find funny? In Quebec Actually
there's something called Le Calm, which is comedy school. Basically. Okay,
like nine percent of French or Francophone comedians in Quebec
have gone through this school class one is like did
you ever notice, right, yeah, freshman year, and so there
(14:27):
is kind of like this uniformity in terms of comedy style.
So also out of necessity, there is this Quebec star system,
like Quebec has its own Hollywood that doesn't exist anywhere
else because it can't exist anywhere else, it doesn't translate.
But now that I've started performing in French, it's like,
that's become my new dream. You're gonna be a part of,
(14:48):
like the Quebec Star system. I'm like that. My dream
has always been to make it just so I can
be a hasban. What's it called if you never did
anything to be washed up? I never was, like I
never Yeah, you're not as you're never gu So I
(15:14):
got divorced five years ago and I met my ex
husband on an internet comic book forum in the late nineties. Wow,
and he was like my best friend and he was
part of my memory and my heart and I lost
that and I lost all of my confidence. I have
not been on a date or been in a relationship
since then. I've had sex once, no, twice twice in
(15:38):
the past four years. Oh really, Yeah, it's been very
difficult to admit to myself that, like I'm interested now
in being with someone in a real way again, like
sharing my life with them. You're afraid to be We
think we all are vulnerable. Yeah, I don't have too vulnerability.
I've known you for a while and we've pooped around
(15:59):
and traveled a lot, like you do have an appetite
for just like some freewheel and love through. I was
sad a lot whatever Jim Hudson in the seventies. Why
do you want to get laid? But also you're such
a I don't know, you have such a nurturing instinct
and you're you're I hear you're one. I don't know.
I'm not there now of that instinct because I don't
(16:20):
want to take care of man. And it sucks that
the result of that is that I might have to
be alone because that bob is the thought of being
alone bother you though, no me either. It doesn't bother me.
It's only like when I want to get late and
I can't. I don't know how people do it. It
bothers me. It bothers me, it does yeah, um super
in the cuddling, I like I like I like cooking
(16:42):
breakfast half naked like that, I would really take care
of my like, nah, huddling affection. No, how's your drink.
That's great, got some gin and some lime and some booze.
It's good. It looks like I got colder outside in
the time we were eating. I'm a little scared. Yeah,
(17:05):
but you know Montreal, like even in like the most
insane winter weather, you can always count on one asshole
to be on their bike, still going. I'm telling you,
in a blizzard, in a blizzard in the weather, let's
be career street sweepers here, Like there's so much snow
so long. Absolutely, and as a warning before the plows come,
(17:28):
they have these toe chucks driving around blaring this insane siren.
Oh it's not a cop siren, it's not a fire truck,
it's its own unit. It's a plows Far the fuck
out of your siren. So what are you doing this weekend?
What are the plans? Um? I mean, my weekends are
(17:48):
always kind of up in the air. I'm as you know,
I'm very noncommittal a party to go to. You're looking
for a dinner party? I mean, I like you guys,
Let's play it by ear. Is that the name of
your next comedy album? Maybe? Maybe? Yeah? Oh for two
(18:12):
in our dinner party search, or rather point five for
two since China did say maybe. Back at our lodgings,
we brush our teeth, tuck ourselves in, and uploads like
photos to Instagram. Eventually I drift off to sleep with
dreams of six hundred dollars rent going through my head.
(18:48):
Oh my god, let's get coffee. Whoa that is a style.
Guy's got like a slicked back, moosed ponytail. I mean
it is morning, and I'm surprisingly still horny for a
rontreal mosaba suble years. All right, you show me up.
(19:12):
You speak French, I don't May I have one of
these with the feta. Yeah, Rusty and I will have
a latte in your largest to go cup. So today
we're gonna go to the Jean to Lawn market, this
food market with this woman Massam who's a food blogger,
because you know, we gotta get our food for one
(19:32):
one gotta get it some snacks. But I was thinking
to get started, we should go to Leonard Cohen's home
because he's this city's like favorite son. Is it a
museum now or that he's dead or is it just
his house. It's not a museum, and it's kind of
I'm not even one hundred percent positive where it is.
It's like, I know it's on this park to Portugal.
I don't know. I just think there might be a
clue for me up there. Yeah. I mean, you have
(19:54):
to go with your heart, go where your heart leads you.
My heart is leading me to get a massage on
a boat, really, because I think it gets you into
the spirit of well, I don't know. I was gonna
bullshit something about how it gets you into the spirit
of the city, but it's just entirely selfish and I
like feeling good. All right, Well, I'm just gonna take off.
I guess I feel weird abandoning you at this stage
(20:16):
of the game. Look, we're both adults. I'm gonna let
you go stand outside, let her Cohen's house like a creep,
and I'm gonna go get a massage, all right, Helena,
how goes? And if you get arrested, I'll bail you out.
Thank you. Excuse me, I'm looking for Leonard Cohen's house.
(20:41):
A Cohen I'm looking for. Excuse me? Is it your
first time here? Wonderful, well, welcome, very excited to see
what a spa on a river has to offer. And
it's so wonderful. I think it's like parked to Portugal
(21:04):
or something. Oh yeah, you just have to like keep
walking a little bit, turned right and up a few
blocks and me get all right. But there's not like
a sign or anything that says that's where I used
to live. No, no, no, okay, it's fucking freezing out here.
This is one of our saunas Lord of ceiling windows.
(21:26):
Looking over the port. This is unreal jacouzy hot tubs
we call them ba. I cannot get over this. And
this is filled with eucalyptus. Normally I want to live
in this. You're gonna head down to the first stack,
can go for your musage. I'm ready. You're in the bathtub.
Ah fuck, Oh my goodness. You're a very gentle touch.
(21:57):
I'm going through the scar tissue, because we have scar
tissue that builds up in muscles that are oversolicited. You
use your body in different ways in such a treme
tempers and so I'm wondering if that contributes to you
seeing certain types of ailments are over and over again,
or what I see a lot of is definitely low
(22:20):
back and more low back tension which crawls up front
because we're huddled, you know, we're trying to keep ourselves warm,
We're trying to keep centered so that we can navigate
the ice and the snow and the slush and the
puddles and the roads. It's really the march of the
penguins in the winter here, I mean, and you you're
going to see that today, and your guys are going
(22:40):
to giggle to yourselves and you say, yeah, there's the penguins. Yeah,
I see them, you know. And it's because we're so
afraid to fall like a bird on the wire, like
a drunk in the mid night choir. I have tried
(23:01):
in my way to be free. Thank you. Well, this
is it? Just a gray Stone one two three triplex,
(23:24):
pretty non the script, you know, he's sang about religion
and sex and poets and history, and it's weird just
to see a gray house on a little park with
a Honda Civic parked out front of it. I'm not
(23:49):
really sure why I thought it was so important to
come here. All right, it's icy, it's cold, and I
think that's the bigel place he would go to. It's
(24:10):
kind of strange to realize how powerful and healing touch
can be because I don't I don't date, I don't
kind of like engage in that way anymore. And so
I was alone for thirteen years after my divorce and
I met I met someone. What I came to understand
(24:31):
about myself is what stops me from dating is how
well can I hide my wounds? Right? So, my you know,
current partner and I we decided are the philosophy of
our relationship is no masks, full disclosure. So I think
it's about really deciding to have to have that level
of honesty within yourself and the trusting. But when you've
(24:53):
had trauma, trust is so fragile. Yeah. So, so one
of my my big trauma is that my mom left.
She she dropped us off at my grandparents' house for
a weekend and then never came back. And the person
(25:15):
who's supposed to love you and conditionally leaves, and that
will mess you up well because you're gonna always asking
yourself what did I do wrong? Right? And will I
do something wrong again? But what will I do to
make someone leave? Because the assumption is that somebody will
always leave a lot of tension in your calves. Yeah,
(25:41):
but you spoke of your herniated disks so often warm
that up for you. So when you go out and
do the March of the Penguins, you feel a little
more ease in your body. Thank you, Lujenie. What are
you up to this weekend? Because you know Brendon and
I are in town and we're kind of looking for
(26:01):
dinner parties. He's making me ask everyone if we can
eat at their house. Basically, Oh, well, that's unfortunate. I
would love to normally have to meet at my house. However,
I am going on from back. Um, could I just
get a what would you order? Bagel? Bagel with locks? Ye?
(26:25):
Mercy visiting town? How do you know? I'm visiting? Guidebooks?
Kind of a giveaway? Let me guess. Larry Cohen's house.
It doesn't even have a plaque. I just feel like
if that was in America, there would be there would
be an amusement park around, like a Suzanne roller coaster,
like a Leonard Wood. Yeah, they would be selling like
(26:48):
my blue raincoats or something for toddler's right. Maybe that's
a good idea an get out on that. Yeah, I'm Brendon.
By the way, Brendan Francis knew, and I'm doing a
travel podcast thing here. Oh okay, I'm Tim Kingsbury and
I live in the neighborhood cool. I used to have
this podcast you might have heard of called The Dinner
Party Download. Well, I don't know that one, okay, yeah,
(27:10):
I mean it was mostly America. Are you a fan
of Cohen? Yeah, definitely, Like I moved here just to
play music myself. Actually, so you're a musician, yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah right. Uh, what kind of hole does he have on?
Kind of Montreal? Like some imagination, he's everywhere. There's like
(27:30):
a big mural downtown since he since he passed away,
and everyone's got a Leonard Cohen story or he's he's
he's everywhere. Do you do you have a Leonard Cohen story? Uh?
I used to work at a grocery store just down
the road called Warshaw and I was like a bag
boy there and he came in one time and bought
some bananas, just bananas. I think there were bagels too.
(27:54):
That sounds very freudy, and actually that's what I imagined.
Leonard Cohen. Yeah, no, he remember, he was he thought
they were overpriced, and he was right. They were nice.
Nice talking to you. I gotta get going. Oh, by
the way, what what's the name of the band you're in?
Arcade Fire? H is? Is there anything going on tonight? Uh?
(28:20):
I think I'm actually getting out of town and I'm
gonna go up north. Um. Maybe are your friends doing it? Like?
Are your friends doing anything like they out? Uh? Yeah,
they're probably doing something there. We all thank you, thanks,
(28:50):
thank you so much for driving us here. We're getting
dropped off at the city's biggest food markets. So what
should we eat there? Everything? You can't taste everything for free,
in fact, and if you like it, you could buy it.
Thank you. Maybe buying provisions for a dinner party will
deuce a dinner party. Maybe. So nice to meet you. Hey,
(29:12):
I'm Danielle. Nice to meet you, may so. Welcome to
the jan Talent Market. A lot of markets in North
America these days have become sort of a tourist attraction.
They sell a lot of stuff that's not really food.
They sell T shirts and souvenirs and caps. Where's this market?
It's just food, Although we might want to come up
with the T shirt idea while we're here. And we
can make some money. You can't ruin the spirit of
(29:34):
this place. That's so American. Jean Talon, No, no paved
sound delicious. I'm addicted to it. Three of these. Yeah.
MBA is most famous chocolate makers in Montreas. Get a
jar of chocolate sauce. We're going to make friends. The
four generations of Forgers. So his mother, his grandmother, and
(29:56):
her mother before that organic honey. And actually we're standing
right in front of one of my favorite stores, Vice Store.
That's for you and your white people. Vice it up,
white folks, Let's do it. My Caron's with Foi gras inside.
That seems like a French Stonor food. It's really really good.
All right, take the whole trey with me. How about
(30:17):
we buy something instead of you taking the sample tray?
Can I do both? You have such a distinguished mark
commenting on the gentleman's eye brow. Yeah, it's got a
beautiful face. What are you doing later tonight? My friend
is visiting. Then you have the tortier, which is a
typical meatpie in Quebecca. What is the quintessential food Montreal
besides poutine, bagels, besides big maple anything? All right here,
(30:41):
we go trying she's trying a maple tart. Oh yeah,
that is incredible. Are you kidding me? What I need here?
The pets, which literally translated is nun's farts? Why did
(31:08):
I ask? Retract exact amos? See uh hi dough with
butter and brown sugar and they put um some cream
(31:28):
on the on top before cooking it. What does that
have to do with nuns? I don't know. Why do
they call it? It was it was invented. It was
created by nuns, like they were trying to find something
to do with the leftovers. Nuns farts. That's so upsetting,
(31:51):
but I appreciate it. I know I'm very sensitive. So Mazame,
thank you so much for joining us the market. It's
been fun hanging out with you. Now we've got all
these snacks. Do you want to hang out with us?
To name? We throw Donna party in our honor um.
(32:12):
Worst case scenario, you and me at our Airbnb. If
we don't find a dinner party, I'm going to go
out to a restaurant. I mean you hit on the
cheese boy, you mean he hit on them. I said,
I had an interesting face, and then you're like, what
do you do on tonight he was into it La la.
Though It's almost four pm and Montreal's winter sun is
(32:35):
already beginning to set, and our prospects for a dinner
party are dimming as well. Back at our place, things
go from labad to the worse. Daniel's back seizes up
and she might have to abandon our mission altogether. As
I sit at the kitchen table, nibbling on a nunfart,
it strikes me it's going to take a miracle to
turn things around. And where do miracles reside? Well, Mark
(32:59):
Twain said when he visited Montreal, you couldn't throw a
brick in this town without breaking a church window. I'm
with Mark Elsworthy, an architecture buff who works with the
local Ministry of Heritage. So right now we're in the
not Cadam the Bonsacle Chapel. It's the oldest in one
of the oldest churches in Montreal looked dates to the
nineteenth they called the Sailors Church. And my eye is
going immediately to these wonderful boats that are hanging with candles. Yeah,
(33:24):
there's even a cargo ship with containers on it. Oh, yeah,
that is a cargo ship. And so they have two
candles in each of them, green candles, like I kind
of want to. I'm not going to steal them, but
I would hope not. But they feel like someone can't
we instagram it and then start a shop that sells them.
I don't know. I feel even bad taking pictures and churches. No, okay,
you know a harbor town, it's considered usually a honky
(33:47):
punk like red light district and certainly in the Prohibition.
Montreal serve that role to this day, maybe with Americans.
But there's so many churches. It's interesting that there's this.
Caebecers are interesting. On the census, they all still fell
out that they're Roman Catholic and Quebeca has the lowest
church attendants in Canada. Church is really tied into identity
but not practice. Yeah, don't come to the church. They
(34:09):
may have been for grandma's funeral a while back or
maybe not, or you know, but no one does baptisms.
People don't get married in the church. M Are there
any other facets of this chapel or that really that
you're that you like or do you want to point out, well,
we have to light a candle for someone, Oh my god,
actually it should Okay, we could light a candle for
(34:29):
back pain to go away. Yeah, for Danielle who's suffering
a little bit. Okay, good thought. There we are. There,
we are a moment. I usually only light candles a
romantic dinners, but here it could lead to a romantic dinner.
Nobody knows they could. I just felt a pang of
(34:50):
Catholic guilt I when I lit that candle. I did
not light the candle for Danielle's back. I lit the
candle because we need to find a place to eat tonight.
Because the whole point of this show was for us
to learn about the town, but then then get into
someone's home to kind of have a true authentic experience.
(35:12):
And so far, um, we've had a lot of people
are very friendly. But when I've asked him that question,
they've you know, been like, oh, well, maybe contact us later.
And I promised the company paying for this, then I'm
going to get into someone's home. What do you think
it's Saturday night? Even if you just let us in
for ten minutes, could we just after lying in church?
(35:32):
You want to come to my house, I'll confessing to you.
And that's what I wished for when I let the candle.
So if there is a god, you got me on
that one. Okay, Well, can I brought your phone and
then I'll just call my husband? Okay, Um, I think
I don't think. I love that you're paying roaming just
a second. This is Penance. Hello, Um the GISTI eskirt
(36:03):
bounskabis opa my meth playing vain. Let's okay, okay, bye?
So you have to do the dishes and bring wine?
Are you serious? Yeah? He's down. Well I didn't really
(36:24):
give him much choice. Yes, thank you so much. This
is amazing. Hello, come on in? Are you Mark? I
am welcome? Hello? Are you should I just throw this?
(36:46):
He thanks so much for showing you. I am trying.
Have you met Louis whose beautiful house half of a
couple of his? Hello, she's the place I really didn't
think any one we talked to today was gonna come.
I love a surprise. We're doing someone sure, triple Gemini
(37:14):
like Highlie Minogue sculptor who who was also dating the
Leonard Cohens. There are Francophone community elsewhere in Canada that
we bought that the Quebec class store where Danielle hit
on the cheese mon America very handsome. Everyone's handsome like
(37:39):
you were drinking the Peanot noir right eye for me. Okay,
just doesn't really get more montreal than like listening to
Sleen after like a dinner party. Someone didn't pay their titles.
(38:06):
Never leaving is what I'm learning to this podcast. Thank
you for letting us loud enough. Okay, the chorus is
literally just by as play as so you can both
stick along already hit it rale le bas By. This
(38:37):
should be your theme song by Where's driving? But you
(39:09):
can walk up as well. Oh yeah, I mean it's
a bit cold, and yeah, you gotta be caught entering.
I mean we're also we're also to be fair hungover
right now that that doesn't help. But this street will
wind us up to the top of the mountain. And
do people actually come to Mount Royal who live here
love it it is? I guess would be like our
(39:32):
central Park, but it's on a mountain. People are cross
country ski yeah, show snowshoeing. We have a skating rink
on the top. Now we're looking to the east side
of the city, but a lookout is that way? Okay, okay,
(39:54):
be careful on the ice. Oh look at that I've
never seen a snowshoe in action. Oh yeah, what a
weekend like that. We did a lot. We did a lot,
but we were talking about coming as we're coming into
the city, kind of like our love lives and romance
and all this stuff. And I think I'm much more
likely to fall in love with a place than I
(40:14):
am with a person. That's interesting there, it is, there's
a city that you love. We're looking at the downtown,
the Saint Lawrence River. Look at Letter Cohen down there.
You see him. Yeah, there's literally a mural of letter
going down there. Oh my god, I thought you saw
an operation when I was at that Letter Cohne house,
(40:38):
which I honestly did meet a member of Arcade Fire.
You have to believe me. I don't. But it's fine.
I'll play you the tape later if you need that
story to get through the weekend. That's fine being there, honestly, Like,
I'm glad I saw the house, but actually the fact
that it was really not that exciting an anticlimactic in
the sense that it was just someone's home. This is
(40:59):
gonna sound corny, but obviously I've been thinking a lot
about like being an artist or being more creative with
my old show ending, and there's no magical properties to it,
Like even Leonard Cohen just lived in a house and
bought bananas, And it's more about just doing the work
and getting it into the world, you know. But it's
(41:20):
not like me living a certain way will make me
Leonard Cohen or something that's always been the key though
you know that well. I mean, I'm just pretending to
learn it now for the show. I think it is
crazy that Leonard Cohen is staring directly at us. I
think it's crazy that you thought I was talking about
(41:41):
a ghost. Honestly, we didn't go over this, but marijuana
is legal here now and last night did run pretty long,
no comment. You know what I think about when I
look in the skyline now, boyash Boy, you are not
only cheating voyage boy, but you're singing it really poorly.
(42:05):
Boyash Boy, I'm gonna walk that way. I feel free here. No,
I think we'll just fade that the real song into
my singing and people won't notice it. Fun Boy thinks
you're singing a totally different song. I think it's only
(42:26):
going to try to find the lead producer on this.
(43:10):
The pilot episode of Not Lost was the talented Crystal Duhaime.
The show was also produced and written by Me Brendon
Francis Newnham. Our associate producer was Jackson Musker. Special editorial
guidance came from Europert Wintock. The show was sound designed
and mixed by Crystal Duhaime and mastered by Hannas Brown.
A big thanks to my friend and this episode's travel partner,
(43:31):
Daniel Henderson. I highly recommend you check out her memoir
The Ugly Cry. Not Lost as a co production of
Pushkin Industries, Topic Studios and iHeartMedia, and was developed at
Topic Studios. The show's executive producers are me Christy Gressman,
Maria Zuckerman, Lisa Langang, and Latomullott. Production assistance on this
(43:52):
episode also came from Jacob Smith, Amy Gaines and Julia Barton.
Our theme song was created by Alexis Georgiopolis aka arp Voyage.
Voyage appeared courtesy of Desireless. Note this show was recorded
before the pandemic, so a big mercy to everyone we
met up with in Montreal. Writer Heather O'Neill, whose new
(44:12):
book When We Lost Our Heads is out now. Comedian
Tranto Winter the staff at Bota Bota Spa. Tim Kingsbury
of Arcade Fire fact check that one and he wasn't lying.
Also food blogger Maysam Samaha and our dinner party host
Mark and Louie. If you want to peek at our
tinerary or learn about any of our guests, head to
not Lawshow dot com. And if anyone from the Canadian
(44:35):
government is listening to this and they have the power
to grammy citizenship being touched. Oh and here's a trip
we'd like you to take from the comfort of your
own phone or computer. Please head to Apple Podcasts and
rate and review us. I knew you hear it a lot,
but it's a real thing. It would mean so much.
Learn more about Topic Studios at topic studios dot com.
To find more Pushkin podcasts, listen on the iHeartRadio app,
(44:57):
Apple podcast or wherever you listen to podcasts. I'm Brendan
Francis Nunham. Until next time, bon voyage.
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