Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:15):
Pushkin last time on Where's Dear?
Speaker 2 (00:30):
I could hear her phone and ringing upstairs that she
was not anywhere in the house.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
Julie and I have spent hours and hours and hours
going over every scenario that it could possibly be, and
we came down to the same thing.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
She did not leave of her own a court. You know, obviously,
when you're the last person, this always become the suspect.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
Two days after Dea disappeared, Keith Harper, the man who
says he was DIA's fiance, drives to New Mexico, and
within a week police in San Juan County obtain a
warrant and search a lot dodge fenced in storage building
belonging to Harper. The cops also search Harper's motor home
(01:18):
on the grounds that it's linked to a missing person
or possible homicide. They remove a section of the driver's
seat and sees it as evidence. Several weeks later, Harper
sues the police to get his RV back. He wins,
and nothing else comes of it as far as I know.
(01:38):
Harper eventually returns to the ranch where he and Diana Fedder,
DEA's close friend from Idlewild, have a showdown with DEA's
two kids, Clinton and Krossara. I talked to Clinton about
what went down that day. He's this very tall guy
with dark cropped hair, green eyes, and a bit of
(01:58):
a nervous energy about him, although perhaps that's to be
expected under the circumstances.
Speaker 4 (02:04):
I feel that I have to speak for my mother
because I don't think anybody else really can.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
Around a month after DEA's disappearance, Clinton says that he
and his sister drove up to Beneatha Vista Ranch with
their attorney to take DEA's truck. They didn't want Harper
having it. But that's when Diana stops them in their tracks.
She hands them a piece of paper, a legal document
that has Deer's signature on it.
Speaker 5 (02:36):
She handed us the power of attorney.
Speaker 4 (02:38):
And the power of attorney is shockingly broad if you
read it. I mean it gives them total control over it,
whether or not to sell or buy anything. I think
it even says even while she's alive.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
In other words, DEA's children can't take the truck, and
they also have to turn over their set of house
keys to Diana and Harper, the keys to DEA's kingdom.
DEA's children had only met Harper and Diana a few
weeks before this encounter. Clinton told me he also had
no idea that Harper was engaged to their mother. How
(03:14):
did that feel?
Speaker 5 (03:16):
How did that feel? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (03:19):
Strange, I mean just weird that people I didn't know
were in our family home that we spent millions of
dollars building and exerted a lot of effort on designing.
And I had gone up there ever since I was
a little kid, and my mother always said, you know,
she was building it for Grassara and I. And now suddenly,
(03:40):
you know, other people who I suspect had murdered her
are moving in.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
Clinton is suspicious of Harper and Diana right off the bat,
even though he has no evidence that proves they had
anything to do with DEA's disappearance. This confrontation sets up
something that will continue to snowball for years, a power
struggle that will become so big it will consume Clinton
and Harper's lives. Clinton versus Harper battling it out over
(04:09):
DEA's estate. The more I've learned about DEA's life, the
more I've wondered, how did someone who had a family
and friends and a supposed fiancee end up with all
these people fighting over her estate. How did this glamorous
blonde go from living in her mountain paradise in a
(04:32):
town called Idlewild to completely disappearing. It's been hard to
understand Dea. I've had to craft a picture of her
through the people she left behind, even if I'm not
quite sure I can totally believe what they're telling me.
It can be a bit of a mind fuck, to
be honest, it feels like I'm looking at Dea through
(04:53):
a prism or a warped pair of glasses that distort everything.
But in this episode, I'm going to tell you about
how Dea ended up on a huge ranch in the
mountains at odds with her family living with a man
who says they were secretly engaged. I'm Lucy Sheriff, and
(05:17):
this is Where's Dea? Episode two? She built her own prison.
It took me a while to track Peggy ken Schlow down,
DEA's younger sister, but I did and eventually met her
(05:41):
at her studio apartment in the San Diego suburbs. Right away,
Peggy seemed like the key to unlocking who Dea used
to be before she got caught up with the idlewild crowd.
Speaker 6 (05:58):
She called me piggy Puff, and I called her I
think my mom told me I couldn't say Lydia, so
I called her Gia, and that's how she got Dia.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Peggy told me that she and Dea grew up with
their older brother Jim, in a nice house with an
avocado orchard on a patch of land in La Mesa,
a small inland community east of San Diego. Even though
Dea was the middle child, she was the one given
special treatment.
Speaker 6 (06:24):
I remember my dad bought us all pentos, the cars,
and my brother and I got these like stripped down pinhos,
but Dia got a two toned Pinto that had like
fur like carpet in it. And she even had a radio,
and so she kind of got, you know, she got
the perks for being.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
A middle child.
Speaker 6 (06:42):
And she always said, I'm the middle child. I'm gonna
meat in the sandwich, that's situitious.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
The family had chickens and dogs, and Dia loved her animals.
Peggy remembers one intense moment in particular that happened after
DIA's dog died.
Speaker 6 (06:59):
She had a dog one time named Coco that got
kipped by a truck and she went up there and
scraped up its blood and stuff and second and baggy,
and we'll never forget it was a weird that she
loved her annals.
Speaker 1 (07:12):
Along the way, something changed. Dea became interested in makeup
and fashion and fancy things. In getting out of Le
Masa and leaving that version of Dea behind.
Speaker 6 (07:24):
She was funny, she was hilarious. But didn't she get
this money thing where it was everything everything to her
and it just created a monster.
Speaker 1 (07:39):
Peggy is honest about her older sister, unflinchingly honest, to
the point where I felt almost uncomfortable talking this way
about a woman who's not here to speak for herself.
Speaker 6 (07:50):
You know, she enjoyed money, she wanted more.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
Enter clem Abrams, a much older real estate developer who
was from the wealthy enclave of La Joya, San Diego.
Dea found him in a listing of Who's Who, basically
this old school way of dating where young single ladies
could find local eligible backs.
Speaker 6 (08:10):
We snagged him. D and I did this together back
in Jim's old bedroom. I'll never forget doing this.
Speaker 2 (08:16):
It's called Who's Who.
Speaker 6 (08:17):
I'm San Diego and I called and I would like
flirt with him, and then I'd give the phone to her.
She would flirt with him and it was hilarious.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
And then they met. Clem was old money. Dea had
struck gold.
Speaker 6 (08:29):
Everybody loved Clem. Clem was really down to earth. Comb
used to drive around an old El Camino. No last, no, no,
you didn't have here.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
They have to be. In nineteen eighty four, Deer got
pregnant with Clinton, and so Clem and Dea, who was
four months pregnant, tied the knot in front of a
hundred guests with a reception at SeaWorld, although not before
signing a prenup on Clem's insistence. Deer became this socialite
in San Diego, and her siblings saw her less and
(09:01):
less until one day Peggy and her brother Jim told
me she just cut them out, the only ties she
had left to that life in La Mesa.
Speaker 6 (09:11):
I think what she felt put off by us. We
liked simple things. She wanted grand things.
Speaker 1 (09:19):
And she had her own family by that point, Clem,
the husband, and their two children, Clinton and Chrissara. Clinton
says he was incredibly close to his mum.
Speaker 4 (09:29):
Oh I was a child we were best friends. We
would go shopping all the time. She loved the shop,
and she'd take me with her and I'd help her
pick out clothes and such, and she thought I had
a good fashion sense for a male.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
When Clinton was around thirteen, Dea lef La Joya. I
moved to Idlewild to her Benita Vista ranch without Clem,
though he still supported her financially, and over time cracks
began to show in Clinton and DEA's relationship.
Speaker 4 (10:04):
It just wasn't a day to day interaction really, and
so it was, you know, more sporadic. I talked to
her every couple of weeks or see here, you know,
every month or two months or so, that kind of thing.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
According to her friends, Dea felt the kids didn't make
an effort to see her, although Clinton says that wasn't
the case. Regardless, Clinton and DEA's relationship did come under
strain when Clem's health began deteriorating.
Speaker 4 (10:33):
I didn't feel like she shared the same degree of concern.
At the time, I thought everybody was being callous because
I was so sensitive to him dying.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
Clinton also started to take over Clem's businesses, including the
upkeep of Deer's properties in Idlewild, and he and Dea
disagreed over how to manage them. Clinton is a real
estate guy. He loves land, he loves property. He prides
himself on having good business sense, and he was pushing
(11:07):
Dear to get rid of one of her proper tees.
Speaker 4 (11:10):
It wasn't really a point of contention, but the interest
rate on it was just horrific, and nobody living there.
Speaker 5 (11:17):
It was a large monthly nut to cover.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
I asked Clinton's sister Krisara, to do an interview too
several times, but I didn't hear back from her or
her lawyer, so I can't tell you much more about
their relationship. Still, Clinton says that disagreements were never that serious,
and it was his mother who started pulling away, not
him or his sister, and he doesn't know why.
Speaker 4 (11:41):
From the outside looking in, she had the perfect life.
I mean, the best husband. I mean, my dad was
just so gentle and giving, gave her everything she ever wanted.
You know, she had multiple properties, horses, all the jewelry
that she could ever want.
Speaker 5 (11:57):
You know, she went antiquing, she traveled the world.
Speaker 4 (12:02):
I don't know, I can't explain it, but she did
have a tendency to kind of create her own misery
in a certain certain way.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
But if DEA's life was that perfect, why did she
leave everything behind and moved to this remote mountain ranch.
Maybe her life looked perfect on the outside, but she
must have had her reasons for leaving Lahoya. Dea seemingly
had everything that she'd wanted as a child. She lived
(12:36):
in the glamorous seaside town, so beautiful that it's known
as San Diego's Jewel by the Sea, but she turned
her back on it for the craggy San Jacinto Mountains.
Clinton says she literally locked herself away from the world.
Speaker 4 (12:52):
I would call her paranoid because I always told her that.
I said, you know, you came out here and we
built this beautiful mansion, and it's all of all of
these valuables, because she would have doors that locked from
the inside, so you had to have a key to
get out of the house. And so I would always
kind of say, you know, you have all these guns,
(13:14):
and it's kind of like you built yourself a little
bit of your own prison, like you're guarding, you know,
all these treasures up here in the mountains.
Speaker 1 (13:26):
When I pieced together everyone's different versions of events. I
can see a pattern of estrangement, Dia distancing herself from
those closest to her and where her family was moving
out of the picture. These other characters, her Idol, Wild Crew, Diana,
and eventually Harper started moving in. That's after the break.
(14:24):
In October of twenty sixteen, when Dea was sixty two
years old, something happened that I think shows just how
isolated she felt. Dea needed major back surgery because she
suffered from lower back pain after falling off a horse
years ago. On the day of the procedure, Chrissara went
with her mother to Script's Memorial Hospital in La Joia.
(14:52):
Not only was the surgery intense, Dia struggled during her recovery.
The doctor's notes described Dea as crying, continuously lying on
her side and sobbing, and saying her pain was an
eighteen out of ten. The doctor recomoned seeing a psychologist
for depression. I've looked through the thousand plus pages of
(15:14):
Deer's medical records from that surgery and reading them was
pretty heartbreaking, the doctor wrote in his notes. Quote discuss
discharge plans and having adequate emotional support for her she says,
everybody in her family is too busy. I really feel
for Dear here, this woman who is in her sixties
(15:36):
with a family, feels that she is completely utterly alone
in the world. And it's also this precious moment where
I feel I can almost hear Dea in her own words.
Then there was this other thing that Deer says happened.
Oh wait, I should make that clear. Harper says that
Dear says happened. I know, it's confusing. Sometime after Dear
(16:02):
got out of surgery, Harper says, Dear told him this
story about Clinton coming to visit her in the hospital.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
And she talked about how she was thirsty, and she
asked if he could get her something to drink. And
she said, you know, I was coming out of them,
of the drugs that they had given me, And she said,
you know, I was a little disoriented for a while,
(16:30):
but she said, you know, after I took the drink
and he gave me, I flipped into a very deep
coma and I was in that koma for nearly two
and a half days so far. He came out and
nearly died. They thought that they were going to lose
me and she said, I honestly believe that he administered
me some form drug that was intended to take my life.
Speaker 1 (16:57):
Wow. And did she tell anybody else about that?
Speaker 2 (17:01):
Oh? She told the doctor.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
There was nothing in the medical records about this accusation,
but there was this note in her chart. Found her
unresponsive to name and stimuli, unable to wake up, called
nine one one, and sent to ED for further evaluation.
I had no luck tracking down dear's doctor to find
(17:25):
out more. I did ask Diana about the story, though.
Was she concerned that Clinton may have tried to poison
her while she was in hospital?
Speaker 3 (17:34):
She was adamant that he did well, that he slipped
her something while she was there.
Speaker 1 (17:43):
Of course I asked Clinton about this too, What is
your response to these accusations that you tried to poison
your mother when she was in hospital?
Speaker 5 (17:53):
Just totally silly and not even worthy of.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
A sad Clinton also disagreed with what Dea had told
her doctor, that everyone in her family was too busy
for her.
Speaker 4 (18:05):
I think, unfortunately, she could be mellow, dramane. I don't
doubt that the doctor made the assessment that she was
depressed or sad, because I do feel that she had
some sort of mood disorder.
Speaker 5 (18:20):
But no.
Speaker 4 (18:21):
Both my sister and I am my father visit her
in the hospital multiple times, and we were always more
than willing to take care of her.
Speaker 5 (18:28):
She seldom reached out.
Speaker 4 (18:30):
I mean, she never asked me for help, or I
would have been happy to help her.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
Regardless of what actually happened, the surgery seemed to be
a significant turning point in Dea and Clinton's relationship. Whether
she was growing apart from her kids or not, she
felt like she was. Dea was in a long period
of recovery from surgery for about two months after being discharged.
(19:00):
During that time, according to court records, she created her
own trust, separate from her husband's. In it, she put
all of her anti Peak's guns, jewelry, and property, including
the Bonita Vista ranch. Deer was the sole trustee, she
was in charge, she had control. In the trust agreement,
(19:24):
she had her attorney include this line trust her leaves
nothing but her love and affection to her son, Clinton Abrams.
In the event of Deer's death, Chris Sarah would become
trustee of the entire estate and inherit everything and that
(19:46):
might have been the end of it, except Dea wasn't
finished making changes to her trust more after the break,
(20:15):
although Dia and Clam were still legally married, they lived
their separate lives, and, according to Julie Stanford, Dea had
an active love life.
Speaker 5 (20:24):
She liked cowboys that type.
Speaker 7 (20:27):
Uh, they're mostly pretty boys, you know, and they were useless.
Speaker 1 (20:32):
Julie is the third slice to the Dear Diana Julie Pie,
this tight knit trio who'd been such good friends before
Dia disappeared. Julie and Dea had known each other for years.
Speaker 7 (20:44):
Basically, when I needed rescuing, she helped me. When she
didn't rescue me, that helped her, you know, that kind
of thing, that kind of good friendship.
Speaker 1 (20:52):
Dea confided her love troubles to Julie. She didn't have
a lot of luck when it came to finding the
right guy.
Speaker 7 (20:58):
She would dig guys that were online. And I told her,
I said, Dia, you did these guys. I said, don't
bring them here.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
You know.
Speaker 7 (21:08):
It's like, don't show these people you met online what
you have.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
But that's exactly what Dea did. According to Harper, they
met some time in the spring of twenty sixteen on
a dating site called farmers only. Harper told me about
the first time they met face to face. He had
flown from Colorado to California after months of talking to
(21:32):
Dea online.
Speaker 2 (21:34):
She picked me up at the airport. She had Ruby
in the back, her dog, and I looked at her
and she had hey in her and I said, boy,
you are kentry girl, aren't you? And she said, why
do you ask that? And I you got hey in
your hair and she laughed and said really, he said,
I fed the animals before I come, but I thought
(21:56):
I'd brushed my hair.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
Harper says they spent four blissful days together horseback riding, hiking,
and then the adventure was over. Harper flew back home
to Colorado, but they kept in touch, and then he
decided to come back for another visit, and then another
until the end of twenty sixteen, a couple of months
(22:21):
after Deer's surgery. He says he just moved in for good.
Speaker 2 (22:28):
You know, the ranch was pretty overgrow when I first
came in. You could hardly leave the cabin. But we
started behinding the place up because you know, her camp
was to use it as they airbnb, and it just
needed to work before it done.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
Julie disputes the timeline when Harper moved in, saying it
was more like twenty eighteen. Regardless, when Julie finally met Harper,
she approved. Harper owns land and businesses in Arizona, New Mexico,
and Colorado. He's a soul of the earth kind of guy.
I like the pretty boys Deer usually went for. He
(23:06):
gets his hands dirty.
Speaker 7 (23:08):
Harper he had a do thing, do you care things
work around the match, and that was something she needed
and someone to kind of lean on.
Speaker 5 (23:16):
She was lonely, and that still that's void.
Speaker 1 (23:24):
Harper and Deer had something else in common too. They
both loved money. There was one occasion when Julie and
Deer were showing Harper around Julie's place back then. Julie
lived in a trailer on a beautiful property that used
to be a cattle runch.
Speaker 7 (23:42):
We were so on Harper the place, and we took
them down the road and looked, and he just saw
dollar signs. He said, well, this splace ought to be developed,
you know. So you know, he had the thing about money, money,
money all the time.
Speaker 1 (23:58):
There's this stretch of time where I don't really know
what's going on.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
Up there at the ranch.
Speaker 1 (24:03):
Harper says that after he moved in, they just lived
their lives, traveling around the American Worth managing the ranch.
But then something happened that caused a domino effect of events.
DEA's husband, Clem died.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
She died on December well, two thousand eight, keen, and
she said to me, you know, it's Independence Day. It's
the first day that I actually feel free.
Speaker 1 (24:36):
On that very same day, on DEA's Independence Day, she
went back to that trust she created after her surgery,
and she revisited the part that left her entire estate
to her daughter. I've seen this document. I've seen how
over the name Chrissara Abrams. Dea scribbled four or five
(25:01):
lines in black ink. She wrote, denied, dated it twelve twelve,
twenty eighteen, and added her initials.
Speaker 2 (25:09):
D A.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
Few pages later next to that line, which said quote
trust her leaves nothing but her love and affection to
her son Clinton Abrams. Dia added in her own handwriting
and daughter Krissara Abrams. So at this point in time,
if Dea were to suddenly drop dead, her children would
(25:32):
get nothing. All these changes to DEA's trust reflect in
real time changes she wanted, unlike Will's Trust impact your
life immediately because they dictate how your assets are managed.
(25:52):
In that same crazy month, December of twenty eighteen, as
if enough hadn't happened already, Harper says he proposed to
dea up on a hill overlooking the ranch, on a
rock formation.
Speaker 8 (26:05):
It was up to the butterfly rock. It's up by
the waterfl we would get married. The idea was that
it would be in Jackson, Oul, Wyoming, being.
Speaker 5 (26:17):
There's a little church there. That's where we have identified it.
Speaker 1 (26:22):
He says he gave her a gold engagement ring, but
Dian never told anyone they were engaged, at least nobody
I've spoken with, and Harper claims as a reason for that,
if Dia married Harper, she might lose out on the
financial support provided by Clem's estate.
Speaker 8 (26:40):
When she brought it up to her attorneys, they said,
you're foolish idea, because he has written in there that
if you don't marry, you continue to give benefits. If
you marry, you would find yourself maybe out.
Speaker 2 (26:56):
Of any recourse anything.
Speaker 5 (27:01):
That's the reason we didn't look forward on it.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
Oh, you weren't going to get married.
Speaker 8 (27:07):
We decided not to get married advice of the attorney.
Speaker 1 (27:11):
And here comes another domino. Remember there are two trusts
at play, DEA's and Clem's, and after Clem's death, Deer
doesn't just change her own trust, she takes another look
at Clem's. The entire time Deer lived in Idlewild, Clem
(27:34):
was paying the bills. When he was alive, he provided
for her, made sure she had everything she needed. But
now their children were left in charge of his trust
and in charge of how much money she was going
to get. So although Clem had provided for his wife
throughout his life, now that he was dead, the money
(27:56):
didn't seem like it was flowing in Deer's direction like
it once was. Here's a good example. A couple months
after Clem died, a once in a generation flood hit Idlewild.
Harper says it caused intense damage on the ranch, and it.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Took out the bridge, It took up the dam and
then left cavities everywhere. And when she had at Clinton
if he would help make the repairs, he refused. He said,
you know, if you're eating, that's all you need for
right down.
Speaker 1 (28:29):
Harper also told me that in January twenty twenty, the
kids cut Deer off financially. Clinton says this wasn't the
case at all. He says that he sent his mother
plenty of money.
Speaker 4 (28:41):
She was never cut off, not even for a second.
I didn't know about the flood. I don't recall being
asked to help. I do recall her discussing it as
a potential reason why she couldn't attend Clem's memorial. And
I said, you got to find a way. This is
your husband's and I'm throwing a nice service. That's about
(29:06):
really the extent.
Speaker 5 (29:07):
You know.
Speaker 4 (29:08):
They loved to try and make it sound as if
we were refusing her money or some such.
Speaker 1 (29:16):
Did she make it to your dad's memorial?
Speaker 5 (29:19):
She did.
Speaker 1 (29:19):
Yeah, Again, we have these two opposing narratives. Whatever the
reality of how much money the kids were sending Dea,
we do know that she felt it wasn't anywhere near
what she deserved. To make things more complicated, there was
a change in tax law that affected the amount Dea
stood to gain from Clem's estate. So, as Clem's legal wife,
(29:44):
she was expecting to get around half of his estate
around five million dollars, but after the change, she could
potentially be left with nothing zero. So six months after
Clem died, Dea filed a lawsuit against her own children
to modify Clem's trust and invalidate that prenup she'd sign
(30:07):
with him all those years ago. Dea felt the prenut
was unfair and that she'd been pressured into it. She
wanted six point seven million dollars minimum. Dea and the
kids vollied objections and amendments back and forth through San
Diego Superior Court. The kids did not want to comply
(30:29):
with their mother's demands. Dea was stressed. She texted Diana
about it in April of twenty twenty. I'll tell you
everything that's going on with the kids, Dea texted, it's
anyone's worst nightmare. And Diana remembers another comment Dea made
again about the kids.
Speaker 3 (30:51):
I had already been aware of the different things that
the kids were doing to make her life miserable with
the lawsuit, and she turned to me and she said,
if anything ever happens to me, Clinton did it.
Speaker 1 (31:16):
So we're almost back to that June of twenty twenty,
back to the day when Deer disappeared. But there's one
other thing I've got to tell you. About before we
can close that loop of time, remember that Deer had
crossed Chrissara out of her trust and had very specifically
noted that Clinton would get nothing. Well, Dea made one
(31:40):
more major move. She changed her trust again. Dea named
a new beneficiary, Keith Leslie Harper, and as an alternate
trustee second in command if something happened to Harper was
(32:00):
Diana Feedder. This meant that if anything happened to Dea,
Harper would assume control of her trust benefit from her
entire estate, all her antiques, bank accounts, jewelry, and property
assets worth potentially millions of dollars. Two weeks after Dea
(32:21):
made this change to her trust, she disappeared. Coming up
on Where's Dear, There was.
Speaker 5 (32:36):
A piece of paper that said that she feared for
her life.
Speaker 3 (32:39):
He would constantly call me, constantly text me is the dead?
Speaker 5 (32:44):
Is Dea alive?
Speaker 2 (32:45):
She stays over and over over and over again to
me and others that if I disappear, and if my
son's doing.
Speaker 1 (33:12):
Where's Dear is written and hosted by me Lucy Sheriff.
Our producer is Daphne Chen, editing by Karen Shakerji. Production
assistance from Joey Fish, ground fact checking by Lauren Vespoli.
Our executive producer is Jacob Smith. Original score, sound design
(33:32):
and mastering by Echo Shaw's Where's Deer is a co
production of Pushkin Industries and iHeartMedia. Where's Deer was originally
(33:54):
developed with Truly*Adventurous.