Senior Living: Unique Resident Journeys

Residents are sharing what it's like to join a senior living community. Suzanne Newman on the Answers for Elders podcast is joined by Judith, a resident at Chateau Pacific in Lynnwood, Washington. It follows conversations with resident Ann and her daughter Jen.

Judith says, "I was born and bred in South Africa. My family had been there for a few quite a few generations. So I left there, and I was married and had two children, one son, one daughter, and eventually that broke up. After my daughter finished university in Johannesburg in South Africa, she moved across London to do a two-year sabbatical, which was the fun thing to do for graduate at that stage. And one Friday night at the pub there, she met this American guy who was there on vacation. So one thing led to another, and of course, he came back. He lived in Portland, Oregon, at the time. But they exchanged life stories via email and so on. And a few months later, she was planning to go and vacation to the U.S. anyway. So she included both in dinners, they and his mother when he met her. His mom would say to him, If you don't want to lose this girl, you'd better ask her to marry you.

"And he did... so long story short, I visit her a few times from South Africa. Visited a few times here. And eventually she moved to Seattle. When her son was born, I came over to meet my new grandson. And that's when she said to me, Mom, what are you doing all on your own in South Africa? Why don't you come and live here in Seattle? I thought that was an excellent idea. Why not? That was 19 and a half years ago.

"If I had wanted to practice psychology here in the US, I would have had to go back to school, and I didn't feel like doing that. So I got a great job at the University of Washington in a specific department working with postgraduate students and guiding them, that sort of thing. And I was with UW for 15 years until I retired. And shortly after I retired, I had been living on my own in an apartment. And so after a while, my daughter said, Mom, maybe it's time for you to move into some sort of community, because she didn't think it was very safe for me to drive any longer.

"So she did find another place for me, where I moved in. And after I was there for one day, I said, 'You get me out of here. I can't stay here.' The complex was like buildings, with long rows of rooms in a particular corridor. And all the people in that particular section would sit and have dinner together. So every time you had a meal, it was with the same people. And the food, the food was brought in. You had no choice of food. If you didn't like what they served, you went hungry type of thing. So I said to her, 'I can't stay here. Find me another place.' So I was there for exactly two weeks, because she had done a lot of Internet searching.

"And she found this place, Chateau Pacific. She said, 'Mom, Let's go and have a look at Chateau Pacific. That can accommodate you.' And the minute we walked through that door at Chateau Pacific, I felt like, 'Oh, this is the place for me. Yes.' And everybody was so friendly, and they treated us to a meal and we saw that they had various choices. If you don't like what’s the special of the day, you have many alternatives to choose from.

"So we decided this is the place for me to stay. And I was here maybe three or four weeks, and somebody suggested that I would be the perfect person to be the president of our resident society. So I might as well... So I was voted in."

Judith adds, "When I first moved in here, I had signed up for three meals a day. But breakfast here is at 8:00 in the morning. So I had to set my alarm for 7:30 in order to get up and get dressed. I'd go down and have breakfast at 8:00. And then after a few weeks, I decided, Good Lord, I am retired. I do not have to get up with an alarm clock every morning anymore. So I canceled the breakfast thing. I get up around about, I don't know, 10:00 or so. I make myself...