Episode Transcript
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(00:11):
Hi.
Welcome, everyone.
Unstoppable Her finally here.
Alga, congratulations.
Amazing.
Thank you so much.
Moza, this has been such an for the past twomonths, this event has been just created.
It's been at the back of my mind.
And I am so grateful to you for, you know, cohosting with me.
(00:37):
I'm grateful to all the amazing speakers wehave lined up, and to help him women to thrive,
not just survive, but to thrive.
So I could not be more happier than to, youknow, have each and every speaker come on and,
you know, share it to everyone.
Absolutely.
(00:57):
And you know what, this event and just foreverybody who's watching, this event is unlike
any others.
Why?
Because of all of the speakers that we have,they don't just come in and tell you about the
theories of how you know to be successful orachieve things in life.
They've done it.
They lived it, you know, so that is theauthentic, authenticity, And you're going to go
(01:22):
away, you're going to take away with a lot ofgolden nuggets, right?
So I don't know about you, but I have mynotebook ready.
So if you want to get, you know, ready with apen and with a notebook, please do so because
everybody has just a few minutes on stage andyou're gonna just learn so much.
(01:42):
And thank you Alka for creating this spacebecause you know if I had this like ten years
ago my life would have been different.
Absolutely, you know what we all start, we'vegot to start somewhere and it's just so good to
just inspire and empower each and every womanout there if you're listening live on Facebook,
(02:03):
you know that we want to help you and supportyou in every way that we can possible.
Absolutely, and you know give me like I I knowthat you are here Alka and I know that you
usually don't want to say so much aboutyourself, but I would like, you know, for the
guest who, you know, so all of you here, youmay or may not already know miss Alka Schumer,
(02:25):
right?
She is on a mission to have women transformtheir greatest setbacks into the most powerful
comebacks.
With years of experience that she guiding, youknow, women, right?
Especially the post divorce women.
She will bring her practical wisdom in life andin her professional life as well.
(02:46):
And most importantly, her no excuse attitude,right?
And that she will bring on to you when shemeets with you in person or on every stage that
she speaks.
So here she is.
Thank you so much Mosai.
I really appreciate the introduction.
This show is not about me.
(03:08):
This show is about you.
It's about you the viewers and first of all Ido want to acknowledge the viewers, everyone
who's listening live today.
You have taken out your Saturday to be herewith us.
And so for that, we wanna thank you.
I wanna personally thank you.
I want to acknowledge you for taking your time.
(03:30):
So this show is not about me, it's about you.
But Melissa, what you truly have, you know,shared, what you just described is truly the
essence of how I live every day is to empowermyself and empowered in the way that I knew
(03:51):
when after my divorce, like how I felt whatthat truly meant to me, having to navigate
life, you know, on my own, after my divorce,you know, being I was broke.
Absolutely, absolutely.
Financially, mentally and internally broke andhaving to navigate through this difficult and
(04:13):
challenging times is what I want everyone toknow that you are not alone.
You have my support and I want to guide you inevery way possible.
Amazing.
And and we know your, you know, we will learnmore about your story later on.
And ladies and gentlemen, if you are here withus, you will hear more about that story about
(04:35):
her story when when she comes and and take thestage.
So right now, why don't we invite the firstspeaker out there?
Let's do that.
Yes.
Yep.
Let's do that.
So are you gonna introduce her?
Absolutely.
So Lauren, Lauren Chiren, we have Lauren comingup and she is such an incredible, individual.
(04:57):
I've gotten to know Lauren and her story andespecially what she does.
She's on a mission.
Lauren Chibran is the founder and CEO of Womenof a Certain Stage.
And she's the global authority on menopausecertification and training and workplace
(05:18):
strategy.
Lauren is a trusted international policy voice,whereby she is having to she contributes to the
UK Parliament, and has served on the awardwinning BSI communities for the world's first
(05:38):
standard for menstruation.
For menstruation and menopause at work.
So I'm excited to, you know, for Lauren to comeon stage and highlight for us.
Lauren, welcome to Unstoppable Her.
Amazing.
What an amazing opportunity.
And I'm so excited about being here today andan incredible lineup of speakers.
(06:02):
Thank So you so much for inviting me.
I can't wait to share a little bit about how wecan successfully navigate menopause and why it
doesn't have to define us in any negative waywhatsoever.
So yeah, I'm excited to dive in.
Yeah.
Well, the floor is yours, Lauren.
Thank you for Amazing. Being
Being
(06:22):
So look, here's the truth.
Menopause is not the end of your power.
It's the beginning of your prime.
The world tells women at this stage of life toslow down, to fade into the background, and
adjust their ambitions.
And at Women of a Certain Stage, we do exactlythe opposite of that.
We don't survive the stage.
(06:43):
We own it.
We run it like a business.
We drive it like a CEO drives a company,decisively, strategically, and
unapologetically.
Let me take you back to 2014.
I left my job as a senior exec in financialservices thinking that I had it all.
I was a new mom.
I was leading a massive team globally.
(07:03):
I was loving everything that I was doing.
And I had a year where everything just seemedto be harder.
It was like I was walking through Trico.
Everything I tried to do felt like it was somuch more effort.
I wasn't sleeping, concentration was out thewindow.
And ultimately, I left my job thinking I hadearly onset dementia.
I was in my early 40s and I could have beenknocked down with a feather if I wasn't already
(07:26):
sitting down when my doctor told me it was justmenopause.
So my mission as CEO is to give you theblueprint to thrive in your body, your mind,
and your future.
So what do we do at Women in a Certain Stage?
We help you to make sure that whatever you'regoing through, no matter what stage of life
you're at, you are able to successfullynavigate menopause.
(07:47):
We want to reframe the narrative.
We want to acknowledge the reality, right?
We know that people have different symptoms,hot flashes, mood shifts, disrupted sleep,
brain fog, all of that.
They're real.
They are real, but they're not the definitionof menopause.
We want to make sure we replace victimhood withleadership.
And just as a CEO navigates market changes, wecan navigate the hormonal changes.
(08:11):
It's not about strategy, it's about surrender.
And we've got that underdog advantage.
Like every great comeback story, this stagecould be your most profitable in health, in
business and in relationships.
If you stop seeing it as
a decline and start seeing it as a pivot point,The mindset shift that we need
(08:33):
to make for menopause is so, so vital to ourability to successfully navigate.
So if we think about the CEO mindset ofmenopause, we reframe it as the boardroom of
you.
We have different divisions.
What divisions are there?
What is it that we should be looking at?
Well, division one is your health as yourresearch and development department, investing
(08:57):
in the right fuel, the right food, the rightrest, the right training, so your body becomes
an asset and not a liability.
And what does that mean?
What does it mean?
It means listening to your gut and slowingdown.
If anyone had told me back when I was in myearly 40s that by slowing down, I would get so
much more done, I would have laughed in theirface.
But the reality is, because of the decline inoestrogen as we're going through menopause, our
(09:21):
body systems don't react and respond in thesame way anymore.
So we have to start to listen to our body.
We might have to adjust what we're eating andincrease our protein, some healthy fats and cut
back on some of the sweeter foods or thealcohol.
We might want to just be aware of how thosethings are affecting us.
So if we do want to have them, we can indulgein them, but we know that the next day we've
(09:43):
got a little bit more recovery time before wego back to our normal day to day life.
On the movement side, we want to find anactivity, maybe think back to when you were
younger.
What was it that you love to do to move, toenergise your body, to feel joy that you
haven't done since you were a child?
Can you bring it back into your life?
So we want to start thinking about how we canlisten to ourselves and slow down, help
(10:06):
ourselves get out of that fight flight freeze,that hyper mode where it's really good for
getting jobs done, but it's really poor forseeing the big picture.
We want into that relaxed, calm, rest anddigested state.
Division two is brand new, right?
This is the opportunity.
We're only halfway through our life when we getto menopause.
(10:27):
And just like a global brand, you get tocontrol your narrative.
You get to craft your own thirty second powerpitch for who you're becoming, not
who
you were before.
Before divorce, before menopause, before thisstage of your life, no matter what age or stage
you are when you're going through menopause.
You get to choose.
No one else defines you.
(10:49):
And then our third division is strategicalliances.
CEOs don't go alone.
They have a board.
They're surrounded by experts.
Think about three people who can be your boardmembers, someone to support in your health
journey, a financial ally, and an emotionalaccountability partner.
You're not alone.
There's over 1,200,000,000 women in menopauseright now.
(11:11):
And we are collectively full of years ofskills, knowledge, and experience all ready to
give back to ourselves, our communities, ourfamilies, and the wider community as well.
Now, part three is like having a twelve monthpower plan.
And this is, if you think of it like aquarterly business growth plan, if you like, Q1
(11:31):
is audit and align.
We want to track your energy, your mood, yourproductivity over the course of a month.
We want to start identifying patterns so thatyou can schedule high performance activities
when you're feeling at your best.
But if you don't pay attention to the detail,you won't start to see these patterns, and you
won't have that ability.
So we want to grasp them.
(11:52):
We want to map it out.
We want to pay attention to it and reallynotice when we're at our very, very best.
Q2 is a brand and broadcast.
We want to update our profile online, offline,to reflect our future self.
We want to start by what is this image that weare creating going forward?
We want to start speaking about your ownexpertise, your own story, and create your own
(12:14):
platform too.
Q3, monetize your skills.
Turning your life experience into revenuestreams, consulting, coaching courses,
products, whatever your thing is.
How can you, now that you've got yourself in areally strong, powerful, healthy mindset,
robust situation, move this forward?
(12:35):
And Q4 is scaling with certainty.
Add one bold challenge every month, somethingthat forces growth, new markets, new income,
new personal goals so that you become this newyou.
And I just want to say to really close is thatmenopause is not your curtain call, it's your
spotlight.
If I'd known, going back nineteen years agowhen I went through menopause, that I would be
(12:59):
traveling around the world, speaking in globalstages, working with some of the largest
organizations like Mercedes Formula One, HSBC,Deutsche Bank, lots of oil and gas companies,
construction firms globally, I would have run amile at the thought of doing any of that.
You couldn't have paid me enough money to do itbefore menopause because I wasn't confident to
(13:22):
do stuff like that.
But now I know that being through menopause,coming through that challenge means that I've
been able to step into my personal power, boostmy vitality, and increase my impact going
forward.
So I invite you to do the same.
Stop waiting for permission.
Stop waiting for permission to feel good, toearn more, to take up space, think like the
(13:47):
person you want to become.
Execute like your future depends on it becauseit does.
Your boardroom is ready.
The next move is yours and I invite you tobecome unstoppable.
That's amazing, Lauren.
That's amazing, right, Alka?
You know, I am so inspired, Lauren, because,you know, like I'm thinking, you know, as
(14:13):
people that I'm going through menopause myself,right?
I think, you know, I'm approaching that andthen you always have that that, you know, you
know, like, like, I'm afraid, I don't know whatto, you know, expect, but here you are, right?
You say that the first thing is mindset shift.
So we have to shift that, and I love yourenergy.
I love your passion.
And then you say that don't go through italone.
(14:35):
Like, those are the things that is soimportant.
Right, Alka?
What do you think?
And what I love and Lauren, thank you so muchfor sharing, you know, absolutely just
incredible.
Absolutely and what I loved was, know, throughmenopause you don't have to go it through alone
and also you've got to pivot.
You've got to pivot and know as to what do youwant, what do you want to experience, what do
(15:01):
you want to do?
Like I said, you've been traveling and you arejust phenomenal, a global speaker speaking
around the world and people want to, biggercompanies, Mercedes, HSBC, they want you.
So menopause should not stop you fromexperiencing or doing as to what you want to
do.
So I think those for me, Moza stood out Lauren,you know what you shared was thank you so much,
(15:28):
because you know menopause like you said, wethink we are already at that stage and we don't
have to, we want to do something, how can we doit, but it is possible you can do it, so take
that leap of faith and just do, know, like youexactly, you gotta go for it, you gotta take
(15:50):
those chances sometimes, but menopause shouldnot have to define you as to what you want to
do.
So thank you for sharing with us Lauren,appreciate it.
Thank thank you.
Well that was amazing, so that was our firstspeaker, ladies and gentlemen.
Isn't this so wonderful?
(16:11):
And we just get started.
So, the next speaker, Alka.
The next one is
a So
it was Sabrina.
It was Sabrina, but she just messaged me.
So she's having experiencing slight, technicaldifficulties.
(16:32):
She was in another device, but she'sexperiencing difficulties on that.
Okay.
So, why don't we transition and the nextspeaker is Anya.
Okay.
So, so Anya, would you like to introduce her?
Would or would you like me to introduce her?
Yeah, go ahead.
You introduce Anja.
Okay.
(16:53):
So Anja, so I am excited to meet her because Ihaven't met her yet, right?
You know, so.
Yeah.
So just like you, you know, ladies andgentlemen, I can't wait to hear from her.
She has 14, you know, so 14 ago, this is herstory.
Fourteen years ago, she was lost, addicted,broke, and stuck in an emotionally abused
(17:14):
marriage, abusive marriage.
After discovering the destiny blueprint and sayyes to deep spiritual work, she broke free.
And she moved across the continents and rebuilther life from the ground up.
So now, living her dream in the DominicanRepublic.
(17:35):
Wow.
That sounds amazing.
Anya helps ambitious women, mothers, andspiritual speak seekers unlock their energy
blueprints, right?
And her mission, this is I think important forus to know that her mission is to guide
powerful to guide women out of survival modeand into abundance and divine alignment.
(18:01):
That sounds beautiful.
So, if you are ready, she is here and she'sgoing to share with us the energetics of love
and relationships.
Hi, Anya.
Hi, Anya.
Hello, ladies.
I am so happy to be here, so happy to see you.
Amazing.
(18:22):
Thank you for being here with us.
It's my pleasure.
It's my pleasure.
I'm excited.
Yeah.
Great.
Well, Yes.
The is yours.
So the floor is yours.
ANYA Thank you.
Welcome, everyone.
I'm energy coach Anya, and thank you for thebeautiful introduction.
The story is definitely true.
I have been through a highly traumaticexperience.
(18:44):
I got divorced, married and divorced very earlyin my age.
So I kind of fast forward all that because I'llsay my energetic coaches, my life coaches kind
of saved me.
And I just want to do the same thing forothers.
As it was said, I am here because I want peopleto understand.
(19:05):
I want women to understand how much power wepossess.
So my story is just a great example of what ispossible and what the powers that we hold.
I always say when you work on your energetic,when you do your inner work, when you do your
(19:26):
personal growth, there's only few options whenit comes to love life that it happens.
And I live both of them.
The first option, the first option was not athriving and not a very successful marriage
where there was a lot of emotionalmanipulation, where there was a lot of crying,
a lot of pain, a lot of surviving, a lot ofconflicts, a lot of fights.
(19:51):
And a lot of times I talk about that becausemainly women don't understand how this negative
energy exchange within a relationship actuallyinfluences your life in other areas of life.
It influences the money that you make, thesuccess you have in your business.
(20:13):
And what I am very passionate about, itinfluences your physical body as well.
So I used to live in China and my basic, myfundamental knowledge comes from traditional
Chinese medicine, where I help peopleunderstand that everything is energy and
everything's an energy exchange.
And if you're not aware of what kind of energyexchange you are living on a daily basis, not
(20:38):
only it tempers and slows down your financialand business success, but it also with time,
all that negativity usually materializes in aphysical issue.
If you've ever thought about what kind of crazyworld is that we're living in right now is
(20:59):
probably because a lot of people aremisaligned.
A lot of people are stuck in what we wereraised to believe is important and what we are
supposed to be doing.
But again, there's more and more sickness.
Younger and younger people are living thisplanet.
And I want people to understand that your bodyis actually consistently giving you signals and
(21:23):
signs and wants to guide you and wants to helpyou understand where that energy lack is.
But because we were not raised to see thosesigns, what happens, we have to go through all
this pain and hurdle and problems andrelationship issues that we really don't have
to.
So me after a divorce, which was a whole newother topic, we don't have time for it today.
(21:47):
But I focused on myself.
This was the first realization.
I have been successfully sacrificing myself,successfully learning.
And that's what we do women, right?
We in our marriages and then the kids come andthen the business.
And we always give ourselves away when we don'treally pay attention to our energy.
And when you don't pay attention to our energy,the business gets more complicated.
(22:12):
The relationship gets more complicated.
And that's why a lot of people are goingthrough these divorces and very stressful
times, because unfortunately we did notunderstand how important, number one, our
energy is and everything else comes last.
So if I may share this little story and kind ofcome up with a lesson that I want to share with
(22:37):
you today, again, based on my personal story isin my first marriage, I thought I did
everything correct.
And I thought, I mean, and we were a greatcouple.
We were both cute and we're fitting togetherand we were very popular.
But on the inside, everything was broken.
Again, a lot of toxicity.
(22:59):
It's at that time when I realized that I haveto prioritize myself.
And we don't prioritize ourselves, especiallywomen.
We don't know how to prioritize ourselves.
Then we have kids and we want to be successfuland we want to do things.
And when we do not, again, pay attention to howthis different energy exchange happen,
different areas of our life suffer.
(23:21):
So when I learned how to prioritize myself,unfortunately, I was not able inspire or
elevate my ex to the point where he wouldfollow and we would have created a different
kind of dynamic.
So I always say when a woman is a little bitstuck, when you learn properly, prioritize, not
(23:42):
selfishly, not from, I'll say, superficialaspects of life, but trauma, inner work,
energies, emotional processing, regulatingnervous system, learning how to rewire your
subconscious.
That's where shifts happen.
When you come into the world where morepositivity, with more peace, with more
(24:05):
happiness, with more love, with more light, menfollow.
And if they don't follow, it's because theywere never meant to be yours.
So I lived that first version of somebody whowas never meant to be mine.
And we grew apart understanding that we havecompletely different values and how I want to
raise my kids.
So I got divorced and I was a twenty three yeardivorcee.
(24:26):
So who would want to ever marry me, right?
But now I have been in an amazing marriage withmy husband for the past ten years.
We have two kids.
And that was the best part of it.
Not only our relationship and our marriage isimproving every year, including intimacy, it's
a big part of it, but also our physical body,our health and our business is consistently
(24:52):
growing.
We do run multiple businesses here in PuntaCana, but my passion always it's in the
coaching area where I help people understandall these connections so that again, can
leverage it and you can elevate everything.
But the moral of this story is that when I metmy husband, which was again ten years ago, I
(25:14):
already knew how to prioritize myself.
So when we started dating, I still knew whatare the things that are important for me.
I still knew I had to have my energy session.
I need to be loyal to my routines and thingsthat make me me.
And he always knew that he was the secondbecause I am my first for myself, and he is the
(25:38):
second.
So there were specific boundaries establishedwhen we got together.
And we are not together because we have to,because we have businesses or kids or ever, but
we are together because literally every day, weare able to choose each other.
And when you have this positive energy exchangeand especially as a woman, there's magic.
(26:00):
I always say with my clients, when you turnyourself into a muse, you can be a muse, then
everything follows.
It's this magical attraction of creating thereality that you want.
So it's not just the superficial of we have thehouse, we're supposed to do this, we've been
together for so long and let's just keep ondoing it.
(26:22):
But the most important is when you raise yourfrequency, the people that you love around
raise your frequency.
If you are shifting in your life and changingrelationship in the only way that you can, I
will say influence a different kind ofrelationship or a different kind of connection,
(26:43):
a higher quality relationship, it starts withyou?
When you prioritize yourself properly, again,let me put a disclaimer that that does not mean
just weekly nail appointments and massages andgirl dates, but really working on how to
overcome my generational curses and my innertrauma and my childhood trauma and my shadow
(27:09):
work and all these fancy words that you see.
But basically the negativity, the doubts, theinsecurities, the overthinking, the fears, the
limiting beliefs.
When you do your work, your energy becomes moremagnetizing.
And especially in this relationship between awoman and a man, men follow because they fall
(27:31):
in love with that energy and they wanna bearound that energy.
So either you are single and you want toattract, let's call it a more high quality man,
you need to get to a higher frequency where youcan now manifest, attract that kind of a man
into your life.
If you are in a relationship that you want towork on and improve, you need to start with
(27:53):
yourself.
A lot of times I hear, well, he doesn't wannado anything.
I can't do everything by yourself.
And I say, there's so much, so much you can dofor yourself.
And if the universe, God wanted you to betogether, I promise you, he will follow because
just like I said, I lived both of theexperiences.
I have lived when I started working on myselfand the universe showed me that I'm not
(28:18):
supposed to be with my first marriage, thatthat is not somebody I'm going to have kids
with.
But once I found that right person, when theuniverse sent me that right person, my husband
followed and we're going ten years plus strong.
And I am very proud to be an example of what athriving marriage is because I still remember
(28:41):
in my first marriage, I did not understandrelationship.
Thought I knew and it was just not going right.
So all of a sudden I told myself and I said,you know what, if I'm going to be the first
person on this planet, which of course I highlydoubt I am.
But if I'm the first person on this planet toshow what a thriving marriage looks like, I
(29:01):
will do it.
I have no idea how, but I will do it.
And when I made this decision, the universestarted shifting world and material and
opportunities in a way that, again, howmagically I was able to find my husband and how
magically not only, like I said, we have everyyear a more connected relationship.
We are stronger to raise our boys in and be anexample for our boys because obviously our kids
(29:28):
are looking at us.
What are you doing?
How is your relationship?
The children are watching and copy pastingeverything that you do.
But the magical part of it, a lot of peopledon't understand is how your business and your
physical body follows that positive energyexchange within a marriage.
And that's what you want.
You want a thriving marriage.
(29:50):
And when there's a lot of positivity, when youhave this nuclear family of joy and happiness
and just great vibes, that frequency attractsabundance, attracts financial abundance,
attracts anything from clients to, again, neverhaving financial issues and struggles.
(30:11):
And a lot of people don't understand how thisis connected and they focus on the money and
they strive and they grind, not knowing that alot of times the negativity can be in, let's
say, this relationship where there's a littlebit of negative energy exchange.
And just to kind of finish off the story whereyou did mention the destiny blueprint reading,
(30:35):
this is a great tool that I was able to I stillable to share with the universe and everyone
who's interested to understand where yourenergetic blueprints are?
Where is your energy?
What are your blockages?
What are your relationship blockages?
Because on top of this blueprint is reallyunderstanding what it is that my task is here
(31:00):
to do, where I'm bad at, where I'm good at.
Because when you have clarity over that, that'swhen you can strategize.
And that's exactly what happened to me when acomplete stranger did my destiny blueprint
reading.
And I was just flabbergasted to see how allthese things that I'm feeling and I don't even
know how to express is showing in my numbers.
(31:22):
And on top of this clarity, I was able tostrategize how do I don't want to be a slave to
these frequencies and my destiny and justfigure out hope I make it happen, hope I'm
successful, hope I am forever married.
I took these matters in my hands and I said, Iam going to do everything in my power to make
(31:46):
sure that I get that done.
So far so good.
Follow me for the future, of course, to makesure that I keep loyal to my promises.
But yeah, it started with esthaneglucinereading, which is an amazing magic.
It's a combination of numerology andtraditional Chinese medicine.
I still use nowadays with my clients because Ihelp them understand what is your blockage, why
(32:10):
you feel stuck, why is this repeating, why youfeel like you can't break out of this specific
layer in a relationship or in financial area.
And when you have that clarity, you also have,on the flip side, there's always, always a
solution.
But again, strategy, I am done hoping, wishing,and let's see.
(32:35):
I'm here because I want to show that you areunstoppable if you dare and if you're brave to
look within because your material world,everything that you're living, love life,
financial life and health wise is just a mirrorof your inner energy.
(32:57):
Anya, that was Thank you so much for sharingsuch amazing, you know, golden nuggets.
Alright, Moshe?
Yes, absolutely.
And I'm I'm so I'm so relieved, Anya, that yourstory is a happy ending story, right?
And
it is.
Congratulations on your happiness and what I'velearned, Alka, and you can just, you know, tell
(33:21):
me if if this is your takeaway as well that theenergy and when you, the energy starts with
when you decide and know how to prioritizeyourself.
What do you think about that?
Absolutely.
That that that's absolutely true.
And and there was a time in my life I wasn'tprioritizing the you know the energy.
(33:43):
I wasn't prioritizing myself.
Like you know, Annie mentioned, because, know,when we don't prioritize ourselves and I always
say, well, you know, I want that it was money,finances, I would always say, well, you know,
how come and how come I'm not having this orhaving that?
And when Anja just shared that with us that youknow you have, it's all about the energy, how
(34:07):
are we as individuals, how what's the energythat we portray right?
And if that's the negative energy you're alwayslike complaining for example, you're always
like in that mood that puts other people off,well then you're not going to be successful.
(34:27):
So this is what I got from Anya.
And that is so true because, you know, if wedon't do that, then we're just not going to
have as to what we're seeking.
I love it.
Love both of your takeaways.
Brilliant.
Well, thank you very much.
Well, thank you.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
(34:47):
So
ladies and gentlemen, I hope that you gotsomething that that you feel inspired.
Right?
We just got through too.
And trust me, like, you know, like we haveamazing speakers that if you just join us, you
will you you will see that the next speaker isgoing to blow your mind.
(35:09):
I mean, I don't know her personally, but I'mreading to you.
I'm I'm gonna share with you what I've learnedabout her.
Her name is April Porter.
She she is an award winning entrepreneurattorney and a founder of Ask April Porter.
Celebrated for her mission to hip to help womenreclaim their sanity, wealth, and gratitude.
(35:34):
I love sanity Alga.
Right?
That makes me.
I thought I thought
that is so so cute.
As a former judge and accomplished multi unitfranchisee, April offers a powerful blend of
sharp, legal, insight, strategic, businessacumen, and real life experience navigating
(35:55):
reinvention and bold new beginnings.
That exactly what you would like to provide toour, audience.
Right, Alka?
I think that is so aligned.
New beginnings.
Yes.
New beginnings.
That's exactly what the Unstoppable show isabout.
You know, to rewrite the next chapter of yourlife, creating that new beginning.
(36:15):
That's 100%.
So, I'm excited to bring on April because sheis gonna be, she, you know, she's she's just
amazing.
And so I look forward to hearing from youApril, the floor, the stage is yours.
Oh, thank you so much ladies.
It's such a pleasure to be here with all ofthese amazing speakers on stage, but also with
(36:38):
all of you watching.
And I hope that you are taking notes, that you,at the end of today, you have an opportunity to
make a implementation plan from what you'velearned today.
Because anytime you go to something that'sgoing to inspire you, inspiration is great, but
action is what moves you into your future self.
(37:01):
And that's really what we're here to talk abouttoday is shedding when you have gone through a
divorce, you have to shed some of your oldself.
Right?
And you have to step into your new self.
And there's many, many ways, many pieces ofyour life that you can do that.
And one of those ways that I work with peopleis through entrepreneurship.
(37:25):
So many times when we're in marriage, whetherit's a marriage that is strong and stable and
surviving, or if it's a marriage that we haveto let go of either way, when we're in a
marriage, we have to make certain choices basedupon the unit.
(37:48):
And once we're out of that, we make choicesbased upon ourselves.
It gives you some freedom to do that that youmay not have felt like you had before.
And what we like to refer to that as through mycompany is SWAG.
It stands for sanity, wealth, and gratitude.
(38:10):
The reason that we've compiled it into thisacronym is because that's really what everybody
wants in life.
Everyone wants to feel sanity, not live inchaos, not live in tumultuous times, not live
with so many things on your plate that there isno room for you.
(38:32):
Not live with feeling like you have to hold itall together and like you can't let anyone
down, right?
None of that feels good.
We wanna feel calm, secure.
Like we have enough time in our day toaccomplish the things that have meaning for us
and that we are making an impact.
(38:52):
We have that ability to make the impact wherewe wanna make the impact, but we're not being
pulled in a million different directions.
So all of us are seeking sanity.
Also, all of us are seeking wealth.
And there's so many mindset pieces tied up inmoney.
Right?
(39:12):
Money is just one form of wealth.
And we won't even get into all of the differentthings people feel about money, but so many
people are taught that that desiring a highlevel of wealth is somehow greed or bad.
(39:34):
And that's just a mindset.
That's just a belief.
That's not necessarily true.
And so that's Anya's specialty, right, isunderstanding energy and how all of that works
and how those beliefs create your reality.
But, but as we sit here today, I just wannatalk to you about creating wealth in your life,
(39:58):
both monetary, but also wealth ofrelationships, wealth of your personal health.
Wealth is generally the thing that we sacrificefor sanity.
We sacrifice our health in order to try to feelsane.
You get home from work after a long day and youthink about working out, but you're just so
(40:22):
tired and there's just been so much going onand you just wanna sit and you just wanna have
a moment of peace.
And so we don't work out.
On the flip side, we often sacrifice our sanityfor wealth.
During the workday, we're chasing thatpaycheck.
We're stressing out over everything that wehave to do.
(40:43):
We're getting maybe we're working two jobsbecause we're trying to earn that money.
That brings me to the next piece of swag, whichis the word and.
The word and is meant to signify that you can,in fact, have it all.
(41:04):
You can have sanity and wealth.
You don't have to sacrifice one for the other.
And in fact, when you can learn to have abalance then, with sanity and wealth and the g,
which I'm gonna reveal in a moment, then whenyou have that balance, what you do is you
(41:28):
create more space.
Just like Lauren was saying earlier, you get toslow down.
And when you do, it actually creates moreabundance for you, which takes me to the letter
g.
G stands for gratitude.
Gratitude is whether we realize it or not,that's actually the feeling, the emotion inside
(41:56):
that we're seeking.
When we're truly sitting in gratitude, there isno space for fear.
There is no space for distrust.
There is no space for guilt because gratitudeoverrides all of those other feelings.
(42:18):
So what we're seeking in life is the sanity,meaning our actions line up to be sane.
We're not getting pulled in a different bunchof different directions and we don't have a
million things on our plate.
Wealth, we get to we get to experience theheight of experiences in life, which might mean
(42:39):
trips with our family, right, coming frommonetary wealth, but also the height of our
health and the height of feeling that we're inloving relationships and then gratitude.
And that is the opportunity when we feel safeand we feel like we have sanity and wealth, we
feel like we can give back to others.
(43:00):
Filling us with gratitude for all that we haveand our ability to then spread joy.
And when we're full of that, we have no roomfor any of the other negative stuff.
And so this is what, I help people achievethrough entrepreneurship or small business
ownership.
(43:21):
And once someone has gone through a divorce andyou're making a big change in your life, you
might realize that you've always had someentrepreneurial dreams and that you've always
really wanted to own a business but didn't feellike you could.
And it may not be because you were in a badmarriage, but it might have been because you
(43:41):
had obligations in that marriage that made itfeel like you like it wasn't safe to venture
into small business ownership.
Meaning it wouldn't be there's too much riskinvolved.
And now you might be looking at thingsdifferently and you might be thinking, oh my
gosh.
Like, if I'm gonna make a change, maybe Ishould finally start pursuing these
(44:06):
entrepreneurial dreams.
And this is where I want you to focus on swagbecause this is where many many people get this
wrong.
They jump into business ownership becausethey're seeking to escape their former lives.
Usually, it's to escape employment.
Stop working for somebody else.
(44:27):
I wanna be my own boss.
I I don't wanna have to answer for, you know,taking time off or I wanna make the the
creative decisions.
I could do a better job than what this companyis doing.
So we're actually looking to escape employmenttypically when we jump into business ownership.
And what that does is it causes people to tryto dip their toes in and to see the temperature
(44:52):
of the water.
And so people tend to not go all in and theylimp along.
And, ultimately, what ends up happening for themajority of people who actually own businesses
or report that they own businesses on their taxreturns truly own a hobby.
(45:14):
They're working in an expensive hobby becauseit's never giving them the sanity, the wealth,
or the gratitude that they seek.
So if you're looking at entrepreneurship,that's where you wanna start.
You wanna start with what does sanity, wealth,and gratitude look like for me?
What does my work week look like?
(45:35):
How many hours am I working?
How how how many days a week am I working?
What time does the business open and close?
Right?
Because if you own a storefront and a teammember doesn't show up, you have to go in and
cover that.
So if you're open seven days a week from 5AM inthe morning until 10AM 10PM at night, and
(45:59):
you're short staffed, then you're going to bethe one working all those hours.
So you wanna think about that sanity beforejumping in.
You wanna think about wealth.
How much wealth do I want this business to giveme?
If I want my business to truly provide alifestyle, then that may determine that, you
(46:20):
know, selling t shirts one at a time isn'tgoing to get me to that level of wealth.
And so you'll have to make some decisions aboutwhat type of business to get into based upon
what does the wealth look like.
And then finally, what does the gratitude piecelook like?
How do you wanna make an impact?
And can you make a bigger impact by, you know,being in the business, creating the product and
(46:48):
and serving the customers directly?
Or could you actually make a better impact ifyou grew a business so that you employed 25
people across four locations and you werehelping a much wider, bigger community of
people, but you were the boss.
So you wouldn't actually be delivering theproduct or service to the customers.
(47:10):
It's a new way of thinking about it becausetypically when we jump into business ownership,
we are pursuing a passion.
When I became a franchisee for kickboxing gyms,it's because I had previously taught dance and
taught fitness, and I loved kickboxing.
And I love training people.
I love educating people in any topic in orderto help them reach their full potential.
(47:35):
And so I knew that it would be fun and I knewthat that would be fulfilling.
And it was.
But if I had stayed as a trainer trainingindividual customers in that business, then I
would have only been making an impact on a few100 people a year.
So instead I started hiring and I trained otherpeople to do that.
(47:58):
And I opened four locations in less than threeyears.
That's how I became one of St.
Louis' 50 fastest growing companies three yearsin a row.
And but we were making a huge impact, a hugeimpact.
And then I had to ask myself, okay.
Now what's my next level of swag?
And then design a company to take the nextlevel of swag and and diversify into multiple
(48:23):
companies so that I can make a bigger impact inthe areas that are mean that mean the most to
me.
And I have a lot of passions.
That's why I've had such a varied career andI'm sure many of you do too.
And so now I'm involved in multiple differentcompanies that are addressing those different
those different passions, but I don't have tobe involved in the day to day because I get to
(48:47):
contribute through my superpower, which isstrategy, and the team of those companies can
execute.
And I'm still influencing and making thatimpact.
But I have a lot more sanity and a lot morewealth by having designed my life around swag.
So your takeaway from this today is to sitdown, get a glass of wine if you like, a quiet
(49:13):
space, and give yourself time to really calmyour nervous system and dream about your swag.
Write down sanity.
Write down wealth.
Write down gratitude.
And write down that and as well.
I want you to think about what does sanity meanto you.
If your life was complete sanity, what would itlook like?
(49:37):
What time would you get up in the morning?
Would you have a morning routine?
What would you do with your day?
What would you do with your kids?
All of these things, write that down.
The same thing for wealth, and you can think ofthat in monetary terms or beyond.
And then finally, in gratitude.
What emotions would you release if you wereliving in gratitude?
(49:59):
How would you feel?
How would you be making that impact?
What are the other lives that would be changedthrough what what you could do if you fully
lean into your purpose here while you're onearth?
And then I want you to take that and, and Iwant you to think for a moment about why you
(50:20):
haven't achieved that.
Meaning, what are you sacrificing?
Are you sacrificing sanity for wealth?
Are you sacrificing wealth for gratitude?
What are you sacrificing for the other?
And then make that decision that you will nolonger sacrifice and and that you are worthy to
(50:40):
have all of swag all of the time.
So
That's amazing, April.
Well, thank you very much.
So what I gather is that no negativity, right?
That's what I learned, right?
So, no negativity because now, you know, if youhave that attitude, then, post divorce maybe a
(51:06):
great time for you to start your own business,Right?
And I think that is that that is my my and I'msure that, you know, your message and what you
just share resonate with a
lot of people.
I think so many people really dream for a longtime about owning a business before jumping
into that.
Yep.
And it is it's scary.
(51:27):
Right?
So it's a big risk.
If you focus on the swag, then that helps youget over the fear.
Right?
It helps you keep going when things get hard.
Yep.
And if you if you need to figure out, well,what business would I open then?
I kinda wanted an open open a business, but Idid think I would just maybe use my Cricut
(51:47):
machine and sell t shirts.
And there's nothing wrong with that.
You know?
Occasionally, somebody starts that way and theybuild a huge apparel empire, but there's a
faster method for most people.
And so if that's something that you just don'tknow what type of business then would take you
there the fastest, feel free to reach out to meand I'm happy to have a discovery session with
(52:08):
you to help you figure that out.
Absolutely.
And I could see that, you know, you said thatyou love to train people, right?
Like and you want to, you are an educator, andyou are a mentor.
So yes, absolutely.
Well, thank you very much, April.
That was such an amazing talk.
And everyone, so now, we gonna I'm gonnaintroduce a very special guest.
(52:31):
And she is an international speaker.
And she is a mindset strategist and she's acoach for unstoppable women.
So, yes, I'm talking about Alka Sharma andAlka, you know, I have known her for a few
years and her mission and what she holds veryclose to her heart is to help women to
(52:54):
transform their lives after the after divorce,right?
So, Alka has the practical wisdom and thecontagious energy and the no excuses attitude
to everywhere she goes especially on the stagethat she speaks on and she is a living proof
(53:15):
that your next chapter can be your best yet.
And why do I say that?
Because she has a book, and I'm not sure if youread it, and I would love for you guys to have
it, From Cocoon to CEO.
And I would love for everybody to have it.
And, Alka, you know, the stage is yours, honey.
(53:35):
Thank you so much, Moser.
I appreciate the introduction and I want towelcome everyone who is watching us live.
This show is about you.
Let me start off by sharing a quote, and thisquote truly resonated me.
It's in my book, From Cocoon to Living the Lifeof Your Dreams.
(54:04):
If you can change your attitude, change yourlife.
If you can change your life, change who you arebecoming.
Your past doesn't qualify to negotiate yourfuture.
(54:28):
To be unstoppable, to becoming the butterflythat you've always wanted to blossom into a
woman, to blossom into the best version ofyourself?
What does it truly take?
(54:49):
And this is what unstoppable means to me.
And this is why I've created a hosting thisplatform today with all of us here gathered to
be unstoppable.
And so I just want to share with you, first ofall, what that took for me in my life as I was
(55:11):
experiencing the challenges in my life.
My entire life, I was that caterpillar trappedinside a cuckoo.
And no matter how hard I tried to step out tonavigate, it was like a vortex.
(55:32):
It brought me back to where I was.
How did I go from being a caterpillar my wholelife?
I was bullied as a teenager at the age of 15.
I was bullied every single day at school andbeing in school was a very challenging time for
(55:55):
me as well.
I just didn't want to be at school and I didn'twant to be at home.
I was cross in between as to where my life, whowas I first of all, who was I?
I lost my identity in when I was being bullied,I lost who I was and what did I need to do to
(56:19):
become empowered first of all, and then secondof all, to be unstoppable.
Well, let's just take from where I was in thatdark moment of my life being bullied at school.
It was traumatic and that trauma was with me mywhole life.
(56:41):
And so going from being bullied to beingdisempowered, I felt disempowered, I felt, you
know, my life wasn't going anywhere.
I had to be the one to control my life.
I had to be the one to navigate thosedifficult, challenging times.
(57:04):
And most of us, when we are going through thosedifficult challenging times, quit because we
feel how do we even overcome, How do we evenovercome the obstacles, the challenges, the
roadblocks that we have in our life?
(57:25):
And I'm going to share with you that yes, itwas difficult but also I needed to do it and
you have to do it because your life depends onyou.
Your life and the narrative that you and thechapters that you are rewriting today at the
(57:45):
unstoppable hero event is because you aremeant, you are here with us because you are
meant to live the life that you've alwayswanted.
And so from being disempowered to beingempowered, that day when I got the girls
(58:06):
expelled was freedom, was liberating, and Itruly feel that when I took that ownership,
when I seized control of the girls that werebullying me, I was the one to take that step.
And you, my friends, are there to take yourstep forward to knowing you have to, you have
(58:30):
to be the one to always be in control of yourlife.
The next phase of my life and how I needed tobe unstoppable was in my marriage.
My marriage was a very toxic relationship.
It was a relationship that, you know, it was avery abusive, abusive to, to say the least.
(58:57):
And I was never allowed to express myself.
I was never allowed to, fully be who I was.
And when you're not allowed to, you're alwaysdisempowered from everyone around you, it makes
you feel that you're less worthy.
(59:18):
And you know, experiences that we always havewith us, that we are feeling that we are less
worthy, are not, we can accomplish or to besuccessful.
I totally understand where most women do feelthat way.
And so what are the steps, the steps that Itook to navigate my life going forward?
(59:45):
I had to step out, to step away from thatrelationship.
I had to break free.
And when you do break free from that moment,that relationship or with that individual, it
truly liberates you to know that you are onthat road to success, you are unstoppable, and
(01:00:09):
you are navigating your life in the best waypossible.
And so what I want to share with you, as yourpast does not navigate or does not dictate your
future, You are the one who dictates yourfuture.
You are the one who needs to be the one andsay, I am worthy of so much more.
(01:00:37):
Success.
I am worthy of experiences that have led me towhere I am today.
And so your past is the experiences that youalways will have, and your past, the
experiences that you have gone through in yourpresent time, in your future as well, is who
(01:01:01):
you are meant to be, is who is shaping you tobecome the butterfly, that gorgeous butterfly
that always wanted to fly, that is meant tosoar high and fly above the sky.
And it's liberating when you experience thosemoments.
(01:01:24):
And I can honestly say, if I didn't go throughthat experience, didn't go through that divorce
or being bullied, I would not be here to sharemy story.
My story is your story and each and every oneof us has a story to share as through the
(01:01:49):
divorce, the experiences that we have gonethrough totally shapes us.
And the lessons, takeaways from being shatteredto becoming who I am today, being shattered
from the divorce was another trauma of my life,very traumatic.
(01:02:14):
And, and yet I had to be the one to rebuild myidentity when I lost my identity in the
marriage.
I had to rebuild, had to start all over.
After my marriage, I was broke financially,mentally, and internally broke.
And to experience and to go through thatdifficult time wasn't easy, but with one that
(01:02:41):
was necessary.
And so I'm going to share with you that it isnecessary for you to rebuild your identity,
reclaim back your power, and to rebuild theauthority that you hold in yourself, in
yourself, in your life, as you rewrite thisnext chapter of your life.
(01:03:05):
And I'm truly excited to, to share with you andwelcome each and everyone who is ready to
rewrite the next chapter, who is ready to jumpin and say, enough is enough.
I'm ready to take back control.
I'm ready to dominate because domination iswhat you are about my friends because you are
(01:03:31):
worthy and you are successful in every endeavorthat you lay your hands.
So I'm excited for each and everyone.
Thank you for tuning in with us today.
And I could not be more proud for each andevery one of you.
That is so beautiful.
(01:03:53):
And I can see that in the chat, people arejust, you know, sending love to you.
You are a strong woman, right?
Yet you are very graceful and very feminine.
And that is a beautiful combination.
And I think that's why your energy just just,you know, you resonate with a lot of women and
people attracted to you because of that, like,know, in a, in a very healthy way, right?
(01:04:16):
So what I've learned from your talk is that youneed to rebuild.
It's necessary rebuild your identity andreclaim your power.
So if I was a woman who just, know, goingthrough the divorce right now and I don't know
what to do, how do they get ahold of you?
How can they reach out to you?
You can connect with me on Instagramalkasharmaceo and I'll be more than happy to
(01:04:44):
guide you and help you and navigate as you aregoing through this difficult time or you have
gone through experiences but let's connect andI'll be more than happy to connect with
everyone.
Absolutely.
So, yes, ladies and gentlemen out there, just,you know, connect with her.
Alka Sharma.
She's everywhere on social media and just DMher, right?
(01:05:06):
Send her a direct message.
She will reach out to you and you know, just,you know, she put in her heart is that her work
and her heart and her expertise.
So stay connected.
And the next person, would you like tointroduce him, Alka?
Yes, absolutely.
It it's the one and only.
(01:05:26):
That's right.
That's right.
I'm so excited.
I'm so excited.
I've heard great things about him.
Everybody speaks so highly of him, and I justcan't wait.
Exactly.
Well, I say one and only.
He's the only gentleman amongst all thesebeautiful ladies around us.
But it's one and only, it's Toby Potter.
(01:05:49):
Toby Potter is no fluff.
He's a real estate investor, coach, and founderwho has rebuilt from rock bottom to build multi
billion multi billion dollar empires with warbattle tested strategies in creative financing,
(01:06:15):
deal sourcing and mindset transformation, Tobydelivers a real truth for real results.
And he's blending trench earned wisdom with awarrior's conviction.
Toby pushes you to push to no excuses, takeradical ownership of your life and build wealth
(01:06:40):
that truly lasts.
He's a vision driven, faith forged and builtfor impact.
Toby is committed to helping you rise,transform your mindset and claim your financial
(01:07:00):
future.
I'm excited to bring on Toby Potter.
Toby, welcome to the stage.
You know what?
Can I say one thing real quick?
I love when you say that Toby delivers realtalk for real result.
That's powerful.
And that's what Toby is gonna do today.
(01:07:21):
Absolutely.
Toby, welcome.
Thank you.
Thank you so much, Alka, Moza.
What an honor.
What a privilege.
Holy cow.
You're right.
I'm the only guy on this stage amongst a bunchof a beautiful women, and then I have to follow
behind you, Elka.
You just gave an amazing story.
You gave an amazing platform, and then I gottafollow behind that.
(01:07:41):
Come on.
Now that's just not fair.
The floor is yours.
Well, thank you so much.
Thank you so much.
You know, as I listened to these stories fromAnya, from April, from Alka, and I sit here and
I listened to the transformation that tookplace from the past to the present and where
(01:08:05):
they're going in the future, it's unbelievable.
But the power behind it is, is that it can bedone.
And this is what I wanna share.
So, yes, I'm a male, news flash, amongst abunch of women talking about women going
through divorce and then transforming theirlosses to financial freedom, financial
(01:08:29):
security, but more importantly, to spiritual,mental, and physical health.
So, real quick, I've I've been I've losteverything.
I I had an amazing life, an amazing future.
We had built an amazing company, And in02/2008, lost it all.
(01:08:50):
Lost an amazing custom built house, losteverything from the financial crash.
And so I resonate with this feeling of what thehell?
What did I do to cause this pain, to cause thisloss?
What did I do to deserve this?
And I know that as a subject child of adivorced family, that's what my mom felt.
(01:09:13):
What did she do to cause the divorce?
Every woman on here I know has askedthemselves, what did I do?
I felt it personally as a CEO, as a father, asa husband, when we lost it all, something that
I didn't do, didn't cause, but I was subject tothat.
I felt just as empty, just as impacted, just asbroken.
(01:09:36):
And so day after day, I looked in the mirrorand I said, what do I do now?
I've lost it all.
We spent so much time and energy to build thislife, to build this family, to build this
business, and it's all gone.
And every woman on here has said the samething.
You put your heart, mind, and soul into amarriage, into a life, into a family, and then
(01:09:59):
it was gone for whatever reason.
Nobody and here's the thing that this got tohappen.
The thing that has to happen is you have to sayit is what it is and we move on because that's
what I did.
After I got done feeling sorry for myself,after I got done licking my wounds, after I got
done, I said, you know what?
This is not who I am.
(01:10:19):
This is not what I'm destined to become.
There's more to me than this.
And I want that to resonate with every personlistening today, right here, right now.
There's more to you.
There's more for you.
But until you accept who
you
are, the power you have, future that you hold,nothing's going to change.
(01:10:45):
Until you dig deep down inside and say, youknow what, Whatever.
It happened.
I'm gonna learn from it, but I'm gonna becomestronger.
I'm gonna become better, and I'm gonna turnthis thing around because I've now got a story.
Who knows?
I had no idea why we went through that crash in02/2008.
I didn't know why I went from being amultimillionaire to recycling water bottles and
(01:11:10):
cutting coupons out of the Sunday paper.
That's how old I am.
You know how the coupons in Sunday paper.
But that's how broke I became overnight.
Lost it all.
And I didn't know what that was, but now I do.
Now I understand because now I can resonate.
Now I can share.
Now I can say, you know what?
I've been there, done that.
Maybe I wasn't ever divorced, but I lost itall.
(01:11:32):
I let my family down.
I let my wife down.
I let my kids down.
I let all my employees down.
They were devastated financially, emotionally,spiritually.
I was beaten, broken and torn apart internally.
But then I remembered, you know what?
I have a creator who created me in his image.
And he said, you know what?
(01:11:53):
I know the plans.
I know the plans I have for you.
The plans to prosper and not to harm.
(01:12:14):
He said that to every one of us.
That is in the bible.
It's in the scripture.
It's his written word.
Therefore, it should resonate with every one ofus that he built us in his image.
He put into us a fire of aspiration, of of ofglory that we all need to grab a hold of and
(01:12:37):
transform our lives.
And when we accept that and understand thatthat we have that much power, we have that much
authority and that much, ability, once weaccept that, then the next thing is to start
believing it, start living it, and starttransforming.
And when I remember that, when I remember that,instantly, all that pain, all that hurt, all
(01:13:04):
that sorrow went away.
The minute I realized that, you know what?
God put me here for a reason.
He didn't take things away.
He moved me to the next chapter.
He didn't annihilate my life for just becausehe didn't have nothing to do that day.
He put me in the next chapter of my life andsaid, now start all over and show this world
(01:13:27):
how great you are.
How great you are.
And so I did, and we rebuilt.
And today I share that message because everyperson, doesn't matter, divorcee, businessman,
male, female, it doesn't matter.
Everybody has gotten knocked down.
Every person has a loss, family member losses.
(01:13:50):
We just had a very close friend lose herhusband just a few days ago.
And it is it is life.
Life will knock you down.
But the difference is, are you willing to getback up?
Are you ready to get back up and make adifference?
And if you are, then you have to start withnumber one, that is you.
(01:14:10):
Every woman, Anna, April, Alka, they all saidthe same thing.
I had to transform me.
I had to show me love, me time, me respect.
And I'm telling you, every one of you, I had todo the same thing.
I had to quit about all the noise.
I had to forget about what everybody elsethought and say, Oh, Toby Porter lost it all.
I don't care because I'm gonna build it backtwice as big.
(01:14:32):
So will you.
Just like Anna said, her first marriage was notthat great, but her second marriage is amazing.
But simply because she transformed herself.
She dug deep down inside and said, I'm gonna bea better me before I can ever do anything
outside of this.
(01:14:52):
To be a better person, to be a better spouse,to be a better business owner, to be a better
anything, you have to start with the internalacceptance of who you are and what you can
become and how you can transform you.
And when you transform you, mind, spirit, body,first and foremost, then everything around you
(01:15:13):
starts transforming with you.
So I challenge you.
Every one of these ladies that talked before mesaid the same thing.
You have to find a quiet place.
You have to find a quiet time, but you have togive yourself the right to be you.
You have to give yourself the right to believein you and know you are entitled.
(01:15:37):
And it's the only time I ever use that wordentitlement.
You are entitled to an amazing life.
You are entitled to everything you've everdreamed of.
And then now once you accept that, go get it.
But you gotta start every day with you.
And I, in my book, The Unshakable Self and allthe books that we do, I say, if you don't give
(01:16:00):
yourself the first hour of every day, you'resetting yourself up for failure.
If you do not give yourself the first hour ofevery day, you're setting yourself up for
failure because you must get groundedspiritually, mentally, and physically.
Establish a deep, deep relationship with God.
(01:16:21):
Establish a deep, deep understanding of you.
Establish a deep respect for the powers givento you by the creator and then empower yourself
to go fight every battle that you're gonna faceall day long.
And then when you come home, just let it allgo.
Go back to giving back to you.
(01:16:42):
Say, you know what?
I gave it my all and I accomplished so manythings.
I achieved everything I needed to for that day.
And then wash it and start all over tomorrow.
But if you don't, if you are behind schedule,if you get up and you're running behind, you
will see the chaos compound.
So I challenge you, if you're serious aboutbeing the new you, if you're serious about
(01:17:06):
transformation of your new life, if you'reserious about accepting all that life can give
you, then do this challenge.
Start with the first hour of every day.
If you have to get up earlier, then get upearlier.
But start making a disciplined action so thatyou start making a better you facing the day.
(01:17:26):
Spiritually, fifteen minutes.
Mentally, fifteen minutes.
Physically, fifteen, twenty minutes.
And watch the transformation.
And I I I give you this challenge.
Give yourself two weeks.
Do it religiously for two weeks.
And if you don't see transformation, give me acall because I'll tell you why you're not
seeing a transformation.
But I've done it.
(01:17:47):
I went from a a wealth, a lifestyle, amazing toabsolutely being almost living on the streets
with two kids and a wife to rebuilding what wehave today.
And the only thing I attribute it to was that Ibelieved in me.
Nobody did it for me.
Nobody gave me anything but God.
He gave me the power, the spirit, and themindset to say, was created to become something
(01:18:12):
great.
I was created to have an amazing life.
I was created to transform lives.
And maybe that's why I went through thatstruggle.
Maybe that's why I went through that story.
Maybe that's why that chapter of my life isjust so that I can be here today sharing it
with you.
But if I did it, if Anya did it, if April didit, if Alka did it, and the other ladies this
(01:18:36):
kid made me go to here, then you can too.
They're not super women.
I'm not super men.
We're just individuals that understood that theonly thing that had to change was our belief in
us and then live that every second of everyminute of every day.
And when you do that, you will see, as An says,the energy start coming around you and lifting
(01:19:00):
you up.
And then you can start walking on air.
And when you start walking on air, everybodyaround you goes, holy shit.
Look at them.
Yesterday, they were beat down.
Yesterday, they were, you know, doom and gloom,negative Nancy, whatever you wanna call it.
And today, they're walking on air.
And the only thing that changed wasn't theemployees, wasn't the job, it was you.
(01:19:24):
You started seeing life differently.
You started seeing yourself more empowered, andyou started seeing a new glow, a new fire
within you that's now resonating out.
And then everybody around that joined in.
That's about transformation.
That's the thing that these ladies are sharingwith you today.
(01:19:45):
They've done it.
They're doing it.
They're living it, and they're excited toshare.
And each and every person on here needs tounderstand that's all you need to do is start
living for you.
They talk about being, getting to a calmmoment.
April saying about being calm, being incontrol, having structure.
You have to start this in the beginning of theday.
You can't start it at the end of the day.
(01:20:07):
It's too late.
You need to start believing in you and settingthe time aside for you in the first thing of
the day.
And then start watching the day start coming toyou, watching the day start conforming around
your vision, your goals, your dreams.
Right now, every one of you, if you'restruggling, it's cause you're chasing something
(01:20:28):
that you can't have.
You're not ready for it.
If you're not where you need to be emotionally,spiritually, physically, financially, it's
because you're not ready, you're not aligned,and you're not prepared.
And what will happen is another disaster.
Start with you.
Build a better you today, starting right here,right now.
Make a conscious decision.
(01:20:49):
I want more.
I wanna become more.
I'm gonna do more and I am important becauseyou are.
You're created by God in his image to becomesomething amazing.
Everyone on here has that God given right.
So I empower you to run with it, to accept it.
(01:21:09):
Quit feeling sorry for yourself.
Quit blaming the past.
My mom I'm 59 years old.
My mom still blames my dad of their divorcefifty nine years ago.
She's the most miserable person I've everknown, and I hope she watches this.
But see, no good comes at 59 years old.
She's been married three other times, but thosemarriages didn't last.
You know why?
(01:21:29):
Because she was so bitter, so mad, so pissedabout what happened when she was 16 and 18.
So you gotta you gotta move on because if youkeep living in the past, you're gonna keep
being the past.
Be the future.
Be the better you.
Be the empowered you Because I guarantee you, Isee who's on these calls.
(01:21:50):
I see who's on here today.
You all are amazing.
The women that have spoke, the women that havealready given their testimony, the women that
are coming up are amazing.
Every one of us has that opportunity to becomeunshakable, unstoppable, empowered.
And when you now can do that and becomeunstoppable, you gonna help somebody else.
(01:22:15):
And that person sitting next to you, thatperson in the office with you, that person that
you have caught or whatever, they need to bethe one that you can change, you can transform.
And if you just change one person, you've donean amazing task.
But in order to change somebody else, you haveto change yourself.
You have to accept who you are, who you canbecome, and then go get them.
(01:22:40):
I love this platform.
I love what Alka and Moza are doing.
I think it is the most empowering thing thatcan go on because women get left out.
They get misrepresented and the women run.
I'm telling you, I know there's always a manbehind the corporation.
Women run it.
A woman runs my company.
A woman runs my backside.
(01:23:02):
Brenda, who's helping you with Algae.
Women are so empowering.
It's unbelievable And we just don't give themthe credit they deserve.
Amazing.
Toby, thank you so much for sharing.
Moses, didn't I tell you?
Toby, he comes with fire.
He's amazing.
I did not want him to stop.
I know.
For another eight hours.
(01:23:26):
So, and you know what?
Yep.
Go ahead, Alka.
Go ahead.
Yes.
I was just gonna say, Toby, what I truly thetakeaway that I got got away from you, you've
got to be, you've got to start with you, you'regoing to develop that you that was always meant
(01:23:48):
to be more, but because of the circumstances,the adversities is always shoved on the carpet
that we can never be successful.
And also what I truly resonated is you gottalet go, you can't be bitter your whole life.
I mean, if I had stayed bitter after my and Idid not, you know, I would complain or I would
(01:24:15):
just say, well, you know, it was their fault,but I didn't take that ownership.
Right.
My life would not be where it is today.
So you've gotta let go.
You gotta let God because it's all about, youknow, if you have the faith, God makes it work.
So thank you for sharing that.
And I think that that's where, and I know wegotta get to the next speaker, but I think
(01:24:38):
that's where most people won't let go andtherefore they don't let God take over.
It's like Carrie Edwards said, Jesus take thewheel.
Let go.
Let him take the wheel because I guarantee youhe's not gonna put you in the ditch.
He's not gonna put you off the cliff.
He's gonna put you right where he needs you andmove you forward.
And if people would recognize that, realize it,accept it, their life transforms automatically.
(01:24:59):
Yep.
100%.
Yep.
So I just have one thing to tell Toby and onething to tell the audience.
So, Toby, thank you for being vulnerable to us.
When you had that moment, my heart was withyou.
I felt you and I felt the pain, right?
I had tears in my eyes because the pain, youknow, and you're absolutely right.
(01:25:21):
You know, everybody, men and women, you know,would put the heart, your mind, and your soul
into the marriage, into your life, into yourfuture, and all of a sudden, it's shattered,
right?
Affected everybody.
Now, women, if we are going through that stageand we know that the man that you are planning
for everything, going through the same painthat you that you experience, then maybe, you
(01:25:42):
know, we we're going to be a little bit moregreat treat the the the divorce a little bit
more graceful, right?
Right.
Right.
And and then what you said is that what Igather, my takeaway, Alka, is that everything
starts with one decision.
You are one decision away from your nextsuccessful chapter.
(01:26:03):
And number one, you gotta know that you havethe power.
You do have the power.
You claim that.
And secondly, you need to accept that you areentitled for happiness.
You can have this.
You can have this.
And then I love your challenge.
So everybody, you're going to do this.
I'm going to do the challenge, Right?
And if it doesn't work, I'm gonna text you.
(01:26:25):
I'm gonna say, Toby, what is it that I'mmissing?
I promise you this.
Ain't everybody listening.
You do the challenge and you don't like theresults you're getting.
You call me.
I will coach you for free for the next twoweeks, and then we'll see how life takes over.
Because I we do it every day.
And and, Alka, you know what the group that wehave, we do it every day.
(01:26:47):
And it only takes two weeks for you to startseeing it.
Holy shit.
This really works.
So that's what my challenge to you all.
So Alka maybe introduce people to Toby Potter.
So everybody, if you want to connect with Tobyand Alka, make sure that you get in touch back
with Alka.
You so much, Toby.
(01:27:07):
Yeah.
Toby.
Yep.
Oh, that was amazing.
Didn't I tell you Toby has such an incredible
Every single one, Alka, every single one thatyou have.
I am so proud of you.
I'm so happy for you because you know what?
You are surrounded by so wonderful, amazingpeople.
Truly.
Like I'm so I'm so happy for you.
So the next one.
(01:27:27):
Well you know Mosa I'm gonna say I do have tosay it takes a village.
It takes a village to put on this event.
As I said you know this event was created abouttwo months ago and but it takes everyone
together to put on this event but also theviewers watching, I want to acknowledge the
(01:27:48):
viewers because without you and your supportbeing here with us on a Saturday morning,
afternoon means a lot.
So thank you for being here with us.
Absolutely.
So
the next step, the next guest speaker we haveis Marilyn.
So do you want to introduce Marilyn Moser?
Marilyn.
(01:28:08):
She is a sweetheart.
Now, okay.
So, I have not met her yet, right?
So, you're going to jump in if you if youwould, you have other things to say.
Yeah.
But what I've learned is that Marilyn is acapital strategist and she is a mentor and she
is a of co founder of Animal Capital Network, areferral engine connecting borrowers, lenders,
(01:28:35):
and investors across North America.
And she after after exiting a 7 figure pharmacybusiness.
So, you know, she's in the drug business.
I'm just kidding, Marilyn.
She reinvented herself through her eliteecosystem and now work directly with the real
(01:28:57):
estate investor and funder, Toby, of course,right?
So, so they all work together.
That's amazing.
So you want to share what you know more aboutMarilyn?
Yeah, no, read the bio.
Was correct.
That's what she does today.
So yeah, I'm excited to bring Marilyn on.
(01:29:18):
Right.
And now, you know, her she her mission is tomentor power, powerful players, you know, and
then, you know, here she is, Miss MarilynBeautiful and Grace.
And let me see today.
Today her talk will be power reset, powerreset.
(01:29:40):
Madeline, take the floor, excited to hear fromyou.
Yes, thank you so much.
Yeah, so I just had a little video.
I wanted to share a little audio from that fora sec.
You'll recognize it.
We used to fit right here.
(01:30:02):
I'd hold you up to say to your mother, thiskid's gonna be the best kid in the world.
This kid's gonna be somebody better thananybody ever knew.
And you grew up good and wonderful.
It was great just watching.
Every day was like a privilege.
And the time come for you to be your own manand take on the world, and you did.
But somewhere along the line, you changed.
(01:30:25):
You stopped being you.
You let people stick a finger in your face andtell you you're no good.
And when things got hard, you started lookingfor something to blame, like a big shadow.
Let me tell you something you already know.
The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows.
It's a very mean and nasty place.
And I don't care how tough you are, it willbeat you to your knees and keep you there
(01:30:49):
permanently if you let it.
You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard aslife.
But it ain't about how hard you hit.
It's about how hard you can get hit and keepmoving forward.
How much you can take and keep moving forward.
That's how winning is done.
Now if you know what you're worth, then go outand get what you're worth.
(01:31:10):
But you gotta be willing to take the hits andnot pointing fingers saying, you ain't where
you wanna be because of him or her or anybody.
Cowards do that and that ain't you.
You're better than that.
(01:31:32):
Thank you for having me.
It's such a pleasure to be here.
I'm here to talk about power reset, the rightprescription for your next level.
You are one decision away from the life youkeep imagining.
And that decision is about positioning, whereyou stand, who you stand with and how you show
(01:31:55):
up.
My name is Marilyn Adamo.
I create business and life transformations bycombining three things most people never put
together, relationships, strategy, andexecution, all at the same time.
That combination is what turns a good plan intoan unstoppable one.
(01:32:17):
It's what takes you from hoping to knowing, andwhen you know, you move faster.
When you move faster, you get there first.
My mom was a teacher.
She met Doctor.
Wayne Dyer.
She actually met him in her career and broughthome his books and cassette tapes.
(01:32:39):
Throughout the seventies and eighties, theywere playing in my house all the time about
joy, energy, possibility.
I didn't realize it then, but she was plantingseeds.
Seeds that taught me how to see what'spossible, even when others, even before others
(01:33:05):
recognize it's there.
That's why even today, when things feeluncertain, I go back to that foundation.
I ask myself, where's the opportunity in this?
What's the sign?
What am I supposed to learn here?
What am I supposed to do?
Who do I need to be connected to right now?
(01:33:28):
And the answer always shows up when I'mpositioned in the right room with the right
people, 100%.
Years later, I built a pharmacy business fromthe ground up, but the success wasn't just from
filling prescriptions, it was from buildingtrust, solving problems and positioning myself
(01:33:50):
as the go to for answers.
People came to me for more than medication.
They came for the prescription that would workfor their life.
And that's exactly what I do now in business.
I look at the whole person and I help them withtheir life.
That's what I did in the pharmacy.
(01:34:10):
That's what I'm doing here.
I look at where you are, where you were, whereyou want to be, and I help architect the exact
prescription to get you there.
The right relationships, the right capital, theright steps in the right order.
For years, I worked harder thinking that wasthe answer.
(01:34:32):
The truth, hard work without positioning andthe right relationships is just spinning your
wheels.
When I shifted into intentional positioning,when I stopped saying yes to everything and
started saying yes to the right things,everything changed.
Doors opened faster, opportunities startedfinding me and I stopped chasing.
(01:34:58):
I'd love to know, have you guys ever felt likeyou're doing everything right, but you're still
not getting ahead as fast as you should?
That's because speed doesn't come from moreeffort.
It comes from more alignment.
Here's
what
I know.
I have the network.
(01:35:20):
I have the connections.
I have the capital and I have the ability toarchitect and organize a plan that is the right
prescription for anybody.
When you have the right prescription, you stopguessing, you stop wasting time, you stop
feeling like you're on your own.
In my world, we take the guesswork out ofgrowth.
(01:35:43):
We replace it with a plan that's precise,measurable and backed by people who can help
you make it happen.
One of my biggest weaknesses was thinking I hadto do everything by myself.
I'm turning that into my biggest strength.
Whether you're starting over changing careersor scaling what you've already built, you don't
(01:36:08):
have to do it alone.
Imagine this instead of wondering who to call,you already have an introduction waiting.
Instead of worrying if you'll be takenseriously, you walk in with credibility
borrowed from the people you're aligned with.
Instead of crossing your fingers for the rightdeal, you're in the conversations before the
(01:36:30):
deal even exists.
That's what happens when you're positionedbeside the right network.
The right prescription is not just about fixingwhat's broken.
It's about unlocking what's what's possible.
Look at where you are now.
Look at where you want to be in a year.
If the gap between those two places feelsoverwhelming, that's your sign to move now.
(01:36:53):
Position yourself beside people who can makethat leap easier, faster and smarter.
If what I've said today resonates with you,connect with me.
Before you leave this room, we'll be here,we're ready.
We wanna find out who you are.
(01:37:14):
We wanna find out where you are, where you'vebeen, where you are now and where you wanna go.
And we have the connections, we have thenetwork and open doors with possibilities,
opportunities.
Follow me because I have it.
I've got a plan and it's working.
(01:37:34):
And when you cross your finish line, we'll doit together.
I'm not selling anything.
I'm here to invite people to come along on thejourney where we do it together and support
each other.
And when we cross your finish line together,you'll look back and realize that was the
moment everything changed.
(01:37:56):
Thank you very much, and thank you, Akar.
You're welcome, Marilyn.
Thank you so much for sharing.
Truly felt your heart, Truly felt you know whatthat truly meant to you, you know having to
navigate during that difficult time, you knowyou got emotional and I felt you, I got
(01:38:24):
goosebumps when you did get emotional and yougot vulnerable sharing with us as to what that
truly means.
And so I just want to acknowledge you for youknow sharing with us and you know as such a
strong woman you are Marilyn and I've knownyou, we've known each other for quite some time
(01:38:46):
and but I'm so happy for you today to sharingyou know, your story.
So that means a lot.
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
And thank you for the opportunity you gave meand everybody else here.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
So, Mosa, yeah, that was amazing.
(01:39:06):
And were there any nuggets that you took fromMarilyn?
You know what?
I understand that, you know, as I was listeningto Marilyn, I realized that all of us, even
though we are so unique, but the experience inlife, you know, we we share a lot in common,
right?
It sounds similar, yeah.
(01:39:27):
Right.
So, there are like, you know, so then, god,like, you know, Toby believes in god, me too.
I do too and I believe that we experiencecertain things in life, especially, you know,
with dark times and with struggles for areason.
So they at that moment, what do you decide?
Do you decide to stand up and thrive?
(01:39:48):
Or do you decide to lay there and become avictim?
So apparently, you know, Marilyn decided tostand up.
Then she's now, you know, thriving, and now shechooses to to help other people.
That's amazing.
Yeah, absolutely.
And you know what?
Also just wanted to just tag along with whatyou just said because that is what happens.
(01:40:11):
You know, when we go through, when we'reexperiencing those dark times, those
challenges, those roadblocks in our lives, oneoften goes through them the path of I'm gonna
quit, I'm just gonna give up, I'm gonna give upmy life because my life is not worth it.
Or you take the best path and you rebuild yourlife, you rebuild yourself, you rebuild as to
(01:40:39):
the power you have, the strength and resiliencethat you have inside of you that empowers you
to build that new life.
Yep.
So there were two choices we always have inlife when we go through those dark moments, do
we quit?
Do we give up?
Or do we say no, I'm worthy of achieving somuch more?
(01:41:00):
Yeah, I'm wondering like what, what are the,you know, the thoughts that the audience you
know, that you know, watching this, right?
I don't know if you're watching us live andthinking of you being here us live.
Or if you watched a replay, share too, like, doyou agree with what Alka just said?
Do you you know, think that is we are one justlike everybody, you know, that share their
(01:41:21):
perspective today, right?
You're one decision away.
Now, do you choose to stand up and thrive or doyou decide to stay there and blame all the all
the people?
That means you choose to be a victim.
But I am excited to have the next one.
Like, I can't wait.
Heart is working so hard behind the scene, andthank you so, so, so much.
(01:41:43):
And you want to introduce her?
Yes, exactly.
Brenda Ringwood.
Brenda is such a phenomenal, woman that she,you know, she is just incredible.
Said, you said, she is working behind the sceneto making sure that the Unstoppable Her Event
(01:42:04):
truly is a success and it truly is becauseevery one of you who are watching live, you
know, I personally thank you, we want to thankyou for tuning in, especially on a Saturday.
Brenda Ringwood is a renowned, she's renownedfor her BT BY, Be the Best You events, where
(01:42:29):
she delivers in a valuable guidance for thosewho are facing personal struggles.
Attending her events equips you with theessential tools to overcome any obstacle
standing in your way.
Brenda draws deeply from her own lifeexperiences overcoming in incarceration,
(01:42:57):
battling cancer, and navigating major setbacksto bring in powerful messages of resilience and
personal growth.
Her speaking engagements serve as a beacon ofhope for everyone seeking to rise above
(01:43:18):
challenges.
And this is what we just talked about, darktimes overcoming those challenges.
By sharing her transformative insights, Brendaempowers others to embrace change, unlock the
inner strength, and chart a course forward forfulfillment and success.
(01:43:42):
And we're excited to bring on the woman behindthe scenes who is who has been creating magic.
Brenda, welcome to welcome to the show.
Welcome, Talina.
We're excited just to hear you speak, And thefloor is yours.
Let me say one thing real quick before I leavethe stage.
(01:44:05):
JENNAH I can't wait to meet you in person so Ican give you a big hug.
JENNAH Well, I'm going to come right back atyou, I bet you I got a bigger hug for you.
There you go.
Love you so much, and thank you for all of thewonderful work.
So the stage is yours.
Hello, everybody.
I want to talk to you about finding your voice.
(01:44:25):
Look, it's on my shirt.
I talk about this about everywhere I go, butbefore we get into finding your voice, look at
this behind me.
Look at this.
I want to talk to you about your labels.
See, I have that label, but before I could bethe from felon to fabulous label I had a felon
label and I let that label destroy right here.
(01:44:49):
You see I came out of prison from the bars,from the concrete, from the correctional
officers, from the other inmates to beingimprisoned right here.
And what it did to me was it told me I wasn'tgood enough.
I wasn't enough.
Who's going to want to hear anything you haveto say?
Who's going to want to do business with you?
(01:45:12):
Who's going to want you?
But I was wrong.
You see, because this label right here, Felon,if I wouldn't have went through that, I
wouldn't be standing here right now encouragingyou.
I had to find my voice.
I had to find my voice because God told me Ineeded to find my voice.
He told me that I needed to reach other peoplewho are letting fear, doubt, insecurities, what
(01:45:37):
other people say, what they think about you,stop you.
And I'm not going to let that happen to me andI'm going to help others through it.
And first and foremost, I had to find my voice.
You see, when we go back to biblical days, manystories in the Bible talk about finding their
(01:45:58):
voice.
Look at Noah.
Noah had to find his voice.
Noah found his voice through his hands.
You see, God said build the ark.
There was no rain back then.
There was nothing that even resembled rain.
They didn't know what it was.
So they're thinking, man, this crazy old guy,what is he doing?
Look at the size of that.
Look at that monstrosity of a boat.
(01:46:18):
What in the world is he gonna do with it?
But with every board he was putting on thatark, he was giving mankind another chance.
You see, he found his voice.
Then I want to talk about somebody in TheUnited States.
I want to talk about a woman who was born inthe eighteen hundreds and her brothers got the
education because they were men.
(01:46:40):
She was a girl so she couldn't go to school,but she wanted to be a writer.
She wanted to write.
She wanted to be a journalist.
She wanted to share stories and she justcouldn't find anybody to listen to her.
She couldn't find anybody to listen to herbecause she was a girl.
And every, every, every, every journalist,every newspaper, everything that she went to
(01:47:05):
said, no.
Nope, nope, nope, nope.
Go get married.
Go have babies.
Go stay at home.
She said, no, that's not what I wanna do.
So she goes into New York City and she findsthe biggest newspaper there.
And she tells this guy what she wants to do.
(01:47:26):
And he says, I see that in you.
I'm gonna give you a chance.
But the first thing you have to do is you'regoing to go get yourself checked into the same
asylum next door.
It was a women's prison for the insane.
And I say prison because once they got put inthere, there was no treatment.
And what happened when she went there is shesaw it was cold.
(01:47:49):
It was New York City in the winter and therewas no blankets.
They didn't have enough food.
They didn't have enough of anything to sustaina good, healthy and mental lifestyle, which is
why they were there.
They were there to get mentally better.
She almost didn't get out.
(01:48:11):
She also found out that they weren't gettingtheir meds.
And see, when you go today into a mentalinstitution, you can pretty much check yourself
in.
But she couldn't back then.
A doctor had to put you in.
So when she left meeting with this newspaper,she goes home, she puts on old clothes, she
gets dirty, she looks like she's homeless, andshe plays the part when she sees this doctor
(01:48:34):
and she gets put in there.
When she came out of there, she was the firstperson to invent undercover journalism.
Her name is Nelly and I'm a Nelly and you guysshould all be a Nelly and you should stand up
for yourself and you should fight foreverything that you want.
(01:48:56):
Nelly decided that she was going to raise moneyand she was going to exploit what was going on
behind those walls.
She raised over a million dollars, A milliondollars.
That was a lot
of money back then.
It's a lot
of money now.
And she got them what they needed.
She also went around the world in like seventysome days after that.
(01:49:17):
She was blazing trails.
And I decided that I needed to be Nelly.
I needed to make sure that whatever I was goingto do in life was now going to be my legacy.
And I'm not going to leave a legacy.
I'm going to live it.
I'm going
live it right now.
I'm gonna leave it too.
I'm gonna live it right here in the moment.
I'm gonna enjoy life.
(01:49:38):
Because when I walked out of that prison thatprison cell, when I walked out of that system,
I was broken.
Not only was I broken, I was hurt because see,I had destroyed my life.
I had destroyed my family's life.
I had destroyed my employee's life.
I had destroyed some of my friends' lives.
(01:49:59):
And I thought, I'm never gonna be able toovercome this.
I have a label.
I have a label.
I did all these things.
I'm labeled.
Now I'm a felon.
I have a record.
I'm labeled.
How was my marriage gonna be?
I have to come back and I have to fight forthat.
(01:50:19):
I have to show my husband, my man, which by theway, now we've been married thirty eight years,
that I still love him, that we can get throughthis and I still had to capture his heart
again.
So no, I'm not divorced, but I could have been.
No, I am not a single mom.
No, I am not a lot of things but I'm a lot ofother things.
(01:50:41):
And I have a lot of labels.
And now I embrace every single one of thembecause they are allowing me.
Those labels are my stepping stones.
They are my stools, my stair steps to greaterthings because my past doesn't define me.
And quite frankly, what Les Brown says, whatother people's opinion of you is none of your
business.
(01:51:02):
So if I'm gonna worry about what other peopleare saying about me, I'm gonna let it stop me.
But if I don't care, I'm gonna let it fuel me.
And I tell people the tongue in my mouth needsto match the tongue in my shoes from this day
forward.
So the direction that I'm walking better bewhat I'm talking and what I'm talking I better
be doing.
(01:51:22):
And when I'm doing that, there is nothingthat's going to stop me.
So as women, we are queens of our kingdoms.
And I wear a crown because I'm a child of God.
And God said, I have great things for you.
I want you to prosper, prosper, which means noweapon formed against you will prosper.
(01:51:44):
I had formed my own weapon.
I had formed my own weapon and had aimed it atmyself.
But I had to put up that shield and I had todeflect it and had to change the way that I was
thinking.
I had to tell myself I am good enough.
I am going to do this.
I am going to make a difference.
Not only am I going to make a difference, I'mgoing to be the difference.
(01:52:05):
And I started an amazing company calledBecoming the Better You.
Not only becoming the better you for everybodyelse out there but I had to start with myself
and I had to lead by example.
I had to let bitterness go away.
I had to stop blaming other people.
I had to take responsibilities for my ownaction.
And then I needed to step up and do exactlywhat I was telling people to do.
(01:52:30):
If you're not willing to step up and do thethings that you say you're going to do, then
just stay on the couch because if you're goingto stay on the couch, then you're going to get
everything that you deserve.
Get up off the couch, Get up off the couch,walk out that front door and make something of
yourself.
Quit sulking.
Quit using excuses to stop you in your tracks.
(01:52:52):
Stop telling yourself you can't do this.
Start finding the things that you can do andput them in motion.
Not only put them in motion but make them workfor you.
Make them work for others.
And sometimes that means you got to change thatcircle.
Some friends need to go.
You can still associate with them but they'regoing to be different.
(01:53:12):
Don't share your hopes and dreams witheverybody.
Let them see it.
Tell people no.
If it doesn't suit you, if it doesn't suit yourfamily, tell them no.
If it doesn't suit what you believe in, tellthem no because it's just going to hold you
back.
So what if they don't like you?
So what if they don't follow you?
(01:53:33):
So what?
Get around the people who love you.
Spend the time with those who care about you.
Spend the time with those who want to help yousucceed.
Help you succeed, not tear you down, not talkabout you behind your back.
Get inside of your head and make a differencewith you.
And I guarantee you it will make a differencewith everybody else.
(01:53:55):
God calls us.
Jesus had a team, right?
Jesus had a team of 12 people that you wouldnever even suspect to do his work and they're
still doing it today.
That's true leadership.
What are you doing right now that's going tochange your life?
What are you doing right now?
Are you sitting on the couch?
(01:54:16):
Are you making excuses?
Are you letting somebody else tell you how tolive your life?
Are you going to get up and make something ofyourself?
What example do you want for your children?
What legacy are you going to leave them?
Or better yet, what legacy are you going tolive with them right now?
Because I am not going to live and leavesomething bad.
I'm going to live and leave somethingwonderful.
(01:54:38):
But I want to enjoy it right now.
I want to enjoy all the journey and I'm goingto use this label right here to help anybody
else that might be imprisoned in their mindthat might say, I can't.
Oh, so and so said I'm not good enough.
To heck with them.
They don't pay your bills.
They are really not even gonna help you doanything outside to keep you inside of those
(01:55:01):
bars.
So get up off the couch, walk out that door,let the world know.
Let the world know who you are.
Show them your strengths because you alreadyhave them inside of you, but they're never
gonna get better if you never use them.
If you don't use them, what's the point inhaving a gift?
There's nothing worse than having somethingbeautiful that you're hiding.
(01:55:22):
And let me tell you, as women, we are allbeautiful.
I don't care how tall you are.
I don't care how thin you are.
I don't care how heavy you might be.
I don't care anything.
You're still beautiful.
Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder and thereis somebody for everybody.
There is something for everyone and every oneof you are beautiful.
(01:55:45):
And if you would just allow yourself to seethat beauty, if you would just allow yourself
to focus on who you are, then you're going tobecome somebody great.
Don't worry about the person you were.
Worry about the person you are right now.
Don't even worry about it.
Just be who you want to be.
And every day that you're being who you want tobe, your future is going be brighter and
(01:56:07):
brighter and brighter and bigger and better.
One day at a time.
One step at a time.
That's how it is.
That's how you can become the best version ofyourself.
Do not worry about others.
Brenda, thank you so much for sharing.
(01:56:27):
That truly was very I I felt that I truly feltwhat it means to go from being a felon to being
you know a critic of something that you know itwasn't and it wasn't your fault.
It never is of anyone's fault but I truly feltthat.
And what really resonate with what you justsaid was you gotta be yourself.
(01:56:55):
Don't you know take permissions of anyonebecause people don't know and let go of the
people that don't support you, that don't don'tlove you but you know oftentimes we don't see
that and I can truly relate to that because youknow I cut some people off but there was times
(01:57:16):
that I was sharing things with people and eventhough they were the naysayers but you know we
always learn the hard way and now I'm very youknow I guard myself as to who and what do I
want to share especially who And we can'talways rely on people because you know, you
(01:57:36):
never know, might just turn against you for anyreason.
Jealousy is the ugly thing.
And us as women, sometimes we tend to bejealous and we tend to tear down and we should
be lifting up.
And the more that we lift people up, the betteryou're going to be.
If you're tearing them down, that's areflection of you.
Now, granted, we all say things we shouldn't,we all have feelings and emotions that we
(01:57:59):
shouldn't, but we shouldn't be out to harm.
We shouldn't be out to hurt.
And as women though, sometimes we do that.
We want to see other people fail and that's notgood.
Let's be a part of their success.
I don't know why.
I don't know why women have to be catty, butyou know I see that so often especially like in
(01:58:19):
the dance community it's very, very cattypeople are always there to like you know guys
aren't but women you know that I see in thedance world are very very catty.
They just wanna compete with one another butyou know you shouldn't have to be that Kate.
Just know the only one you should be competingwith is yourself to be better.
(01:58:41):
You should just look at yourself and be better.
And I'm going to tell you, you need a spouse.
You need a partner that is going to do thatwith you.
So when you're in a marriage that they'retrying to suppress who you are, that's not
good.
And you should be able to voice your opinion.
I'm not saying it's easy.
I've been married for thirty eight years.
My marriage has not been perfect.
It's not perfect right now.
But what I can tell you is I had to stand upfor what I wanted.
(01:59:04):
I had to stand up for who I wanted to be, and Ihad to make it happen.
If you're not willing to do that then you'repart of the blame.
Exactly, you've got to make it happen.
So women we encourage you to make it happen,raise your voice and to express yourself as to
if you don't like something you know you gottachange it and this is what you know we
(01:59:28):
encourage you to do as to be unstoppable, yougotta do that, you gotta express who you Who
was it?
What are your thoughts And I thought that wasso incredible as to what you really have to do
to change.
Yes.
I love what Brenda said that do not let anyother people stop you.
(01:59:48):
But what I take is that Brenda is thatsometimes the very person that stops you is
you.
So that we need to recognize that and we haveto get yourself out of the way so you can move
on, right?
And then I love what you said that don't buildyour legacy for the future.
Live your legacy right now, today.
At this very moment and it's so inspiring andthank you.
(02:00:11):
That was a powerful talk.
Thank you so much and I hope that the audiencecan feel your energy as well.
I mean, share with us.
Like, what do you think?
Do you now is again, do you want to live yourlegacy right now at this very moment?
It's just one decision away.
Absolutely, you decide to do that, you decideto live your legacy, you decide to rewrite your
(02:00:35):
story every single day.
It's not about taking permissions of anyoneelse because it's you, you are the one
controlling your life today, starting todayespecially, but you are the one controlling
your life every single day.
And what the amazing speakers have shared, whatis that, you know, what's that routine when you
(02:00:58):
wake up in the morning?
What do you do as Toby shared?
What do you do?
So season control of your day is gonna beparamount.
So we encourage you to do that.
Yes, amazing.
And I can wait to see and hear this nextspeaker, right?
I just
(02:01:21):
can't wait.
Right exactly, so this speaker who is going tocome on, she was going to come on in the
beginning but because of slight technicaldifficulties, we decided to put Sabrina second
before last, because she unfortunately hadtechnical difficulties earlier on today.
(02:01:44):
So, you know, she is truly an incredible woman.
I've gotten to know Sabrina and her entirefamily.
I've gotten to know them and they are justincredible.
As a family, they are so powerful.
Sabrina, she is an incredible woman.
And so I'm truly excited to what she is goingto be sharing.
(02:02:08):
But Sabrina Ben Salmi is a renowned businessand personal development consultant.
She's a publisher of multiple award winner, andshe's a dynamic international keynote speaker.
(02:02:29):
She is the founding director of Harris InvictusAcademy and the founder of the Unheard Crisis
of a Mother.
Sabrina's relentless commitment to personalgrowth and community empowers and gathers
(02:02:51):
numerous accolades, including the BlackAchievement Award for the best dyslexic owned
business and the Global Queen Award of 2025.
Sabrina is frequently featured in internationalmedia and is recognized as one of the top 50
(02:03:17):
most inspirational black women in The UK.
And she is passionate about helping familiesand individuals to realize their highest
potential.
And I'm excited to bring on Sabrina Ben Salmi,who is just an incredible force.
(02:03:39):
Amazing.
You made it.
Thank you.
So great.
You know, as I say, make you know, put the bestfor last.
And you truly are an incredible force, Sabrina.
It truly is so inspiring that you could be heretoday with us.
It's a pleasure to be here.
(02:04:01):
I'm so pleasantly rendered speechless byeverybody that has come up.
I'm in awe, the emotion, the passion.
I'm just really feel I'm I'm an empath, so it'sjust I should have went second.
I think at this stage, it's so beautiful.
Well done.
Congratulations.
Well, thank you for being here with us, andthank you regardless of all of the challenges
(02:04:21):
prior.
Yeah.
You are here.
So you show up for everybody.
So the stage is your, my dear.
Thank you.
I think it's to share.
Can it's uploaded.
Can it share here?
It's in
the I don't know
how what I do to click it.
Do I press present?
Maybe.
I don't know.
(02:04:41):
No.
Share.
We needed that prior too.
So no, you cannot.
Oh, you can't.
Oh, okay.
Sorry.
I'll do I'll do it for myself then.
Sorry about that.
Let me just go ahead and oh, can you see me,guys, everybody?
Can you hear me?
(02:05:02):
We can see you and we can hear yes.
We can see you and hear you.
Oh.
Am I audible?
It seems we're frozen.
I don't know what's happened.
(02:05:28):
That's very interesting.
You are frozen, but we can hear you.
You can hear me.
Okay.
Yeah.
Because it's just completely frozen, Lauren.
I'll just go ahead and talk.
So sorry about that.
So my name is Sabrina Ben Salmi.
I'm gonna get the slides to the side of what Iwas gonna talk about.
(02:05:49):
Sorry that it's frozen I have no idea what'sgoing on.
So for me I'm very much connected into energyand I thought it was so interesting that I had
technical issues for absolutely no reason.
I'm actually on my son's computer at the momentand you know, for this to freeze and everything
going on, it's very interesting.
(02:06:10):
But I'll I'll go straight ahead and just diveinto the first essence.
So my talk is all about becoming you.
So becoming you is and building your legacy, Ithink, is the most raw and unfiltered aspect of
how we can show up in this world.
I think often we go through our own experiencesin childhood, in school, in our careers, in
(02:06:34):
education, being told that who we are is notgood enough.
Being told that we shouldn't be so loud or sovocal about our opinions or our natural way of
showing up.
I have no idea what's going on here.
My screen just moved.
So what I'm really passionate about issupporting women to transform their stories
(02:06:56):
into influence, impact, and income.
So, I've got a quote here that I'd really liketo share is, if you can't change your past,
what's really important is put becoming theauthor of your future.
And I think there's something very significantaround some of the aspects of things that have
(02:07:16):
been shared today that we often talk about howwe get stuck in the past, get stuck in the
pain, get stuck in what ifs, shoulda, coulda,or woulda.
And I think it's so important to be kind toyourself during transit, this transition,
because at the end of the day, we are human.
We do have feelings.
And it's so important for us to honor thosefeelings, but while still pursuing who we are.
(02:07:42):
So one of the things I really love to focus onis what is your own story that can really
transform the world?
And I want you to think about that.
Not the story that someone else has given thetitle to, not the story that people assume you
should be showing up for, but what is theuntold story behind the story that really
(02:08:04):
defines who you are?
And I want you to take a moment to just processwhat that is for you.
Take a moment to ask yourself, whilst becomingme, what does that mean to me, And who have I
been all the while?
You see, chances are we become everything toeveryone.
(02:08:25):
But the real question is who are we toourselves?
Now as women, we're often guilty of wearingmultiple hats and being everyone, everything
and everyone to everybody else, but who are wetruly to ourselves?
The label of being the wife, the mother, thesister, the daughter, the friend, and always
trying to over deliver and process how we canbe the best of that for others whilst we're not
(02:08:51):
anything to ourselves.
And it really brings me back to a personalstory of my own that I I didn't start inserting
myself into my own life until I was about 31.
I remember being in a coaching session, and Imy my mentor said to me, Sabrina, what do you
do for yourself?
What is your favorite thing to do for you?
(02:09:11):
And at that stage in my life, I had no cluebecause I hadn't been living myself my life for
myself.
Everything I was was for someone else outsideof myself.
So there was this uncomfortable silence.
Now would you agree that you've experiencedthose moments where you've been so shocked that
you're just been shocked and stunned into thisuncomfortable silence.
(02:09:35):
And it's the silence in between your youhearing the question, you waiting to respond,
but not knowing which how to articulate what'sthat all the noise that's going on inside of
yourself.
Yourself.
Although there's no words coming out, there'sthat silence in between.
But inside, there's so much noise.
You know, that saying when they say thatsilence can often be loud.
(02:09:56):
That's the scenario that I'm really thinkingabout.
Now one of the things I really want us to bemindful of is that 81% of people say they want
to write a book, but fewer than 1% actually dothat.
Are you one of the 81%, or are you one of the1% that actually go ahead and pursue and step
(02:10:19):
into that essence of sharing that legacy withthe world?
So leaders with published books are perceivedas more, at least three times more credible and
five times more likely to attract high valueopportunities.
And this is why us as a family, myselfindividually, focus on we have the consultancy,
(02:10:46):
we do public speaking and various otheraspects.
But when I was going through my own personaljourney, when I did go through my divorce, one
of the things that I found to be reallytherapeutic was giving myself permission to
share my story, giving myself permission towrite the story.
And we do that through Dreaming Big Togetherpublishing, but Dream Big Together is also the
(02:11:08):
consultancy.
And as a family, we've published roughly 75books plus and still counting.
Paulo, who's my second youngest son, he iswinning.
He's published about 36 books under hispersonal publishing house.
Now, what we've been speaking about today aboutgiving ourselves permission and becoming you, I
(02:11:31):
think it's so important for us to be mindful ofwhat season are you in?
You see, as women, we don't just give birth tochildren, we give birth to nations.
We ignite revolutions.
We hold pain in one hand while pursuing ourdreams and aspirations with the other.
We don't just create life.
(02:11:52):
We shape it.
We nurture it.
And we we send it out as a big light.
I myself has been very fortunate to give birthto five precious children.
My oldest being Lachey.
She's in the Korean world.
She's very passionate about cultureconnectivity.
And she, you know, when she was like 15, she'snow 25.
(02:12:13):
One of the hobbies that she had was just todelve into the Korean culture, Korean world.
And she actually has been recognized by thefirst lady of South Korea for some of her work,
which really blew my mind.
And I think sometimes if we surrender tobecoming ourselves, children are great
teachers.
And I'm saying this to say that the example ofour young people in our lives, the young people
(02:12:36):
in the world, can sometimes grant us permissionto go deeper with ourselves.
You have, she's also done a TED talk aroundthat as well and the power that the the soft
power of Korean culture around the world andhow it's helped to heal so many people.
We have Trey Sean.
Trey Sean loves the liberation that financialeducation gives, and his mission is to teach
(02:12:59):
1,000,000 people, young people at thatfinancial education to help give them freedom.
He says that finance gives us freedom, gives uschoice.
My middle child is Yasmin.
She dreams, she's an aspiring plastic surgeonand she's currently doing work experience at
the Royal College of Surgeons here in London.
(02:13:19):
And since a child, she's always loved animals,loved babies and loved life, but always spoke
about love.
My second to last son, who I mentioned a littlebit earlier, is Paulo.
He's my adventurous young man.
He always teaches us to go beyond theboundaries and often to break rules because
he's very curious what lies beyond thatperimeter.
(02:13:41):
Why do people wanna keep us away from that?
And he's all about leadership and mindset.
And my youngest is actually 12.
His name's Amir, and he talks to people aboutexploring what is your dream.
And I really want you to be invited into thefamily dynamics because as a family, it was all
(02:14:01):
about me mothering them.
But although I thought I was just motheringthem, it very quickly changed into them pouring
into me, them blessing me.
And it became this beautiful ecosystem.
And if you're a mother here or maybe you don'thave children, but you've got children in your
life as nieces and nephews, One of the sacredessences that I think is really profound that
(02:14:27):
I've seen is when you invite a young people, aperson into your life to share their raw
nature, to share the the essence of them thatcan somewhat be shut down in the school system,
in society, something very unique starts tohappen.
And if I go back in my own personal story, Irecognize that by becoming me, I gave
(02:14:52):
permission for people to be invited into myworld.
I was able to set up publishing houses forindividuals, for families, some of which some
of them are quite popular clients is ReganHealya.
She's an international transformational coachupon so many levels.
Most of you may have seen her on the Mindvalleyplatform at the moment, and she just does some
(02:15:16):
incredible work.
Well, my eldest daughter is head of youth atRHI Youth.
And I think it's so important when weunderstand, especially as mothers, that our
liberation in choosing us doesn't just setourselves free, but it often sets our children
free.
It often sets everybody who's connected withus.
(02:15:36):
You know that saying that everything attachedto me wins?
And the reality is the moment you choose tochoose you, everything attached to you really
does win.
And I wanna go back to the question I askedearlier.
I just wanna bring some attention to that.
It's what season are you in?
Now when I said it earlier, I'm not sure if ifyou caught it, I want you to write that down.
(02:15:58):
See, You one of the things I think we often dothat's wrong is that we don't do the diagnosis
of where we are.
And would you agree that if we're in summer andwe're wearing our winter coat, it's not gonna
be comfortable?
And I think a similar thing happens when westart calling upon the giant within.
If we don't know what season we're in, is itour autumn?
(02:16:20):
Is it our spring?
Is it our summer?
Is it our winter?
Like, should we be hibernating, or should we becreating?
And I think these are key questions that wehave to be honest with ourselves.
Because the danger is sometimes we're pushingwhen we need to be resting.
Sometimes we're resting when we're supposed tobe pushing and so on and so forth.
But I think when we get to that premise ofgoing on that journey of recognizing who are we
(02:16:45):
and who are we becoming, and becoming youstarts with making everything else secondary.
I know a lot of the speakers today have spokenabout that is you need to kind of drown out the
the distractions.
Drown out the distractions of how people aresaying you should be going along with this.
The reality is there's a vision inside of youthat no one can guide you towards.
(02:17:08):
So it's about you getting used to you.
It's about you getting used to hearing thevoice of your creator deep within you and trust
in that.
Women have this huge capability of intuitiveknow how.
It doesn't make sense to everyone that we justknow like we know like we know when it comes to
our loved ones, when it comes to our vision.
And I think sometimes we distort that when itwhen we're surrounded by so much noise and
(02:17:33):
distractions, and we try to talk ourself out ofthe reality that we do know these things, but
it's just we're not well practiced when itcomes to ourselves.
So I would say that get clarity around your ownstory.
Identify what is the message.
And sometimes we don't know the message as wemight not be at that stage of our life, but the
(02:17:54):
message will always leave clues.
There'll be things that people come to you fornaturally, organically, over and over again.
There'll be things that people just feelcomfortable sharing with you.
You know?
Are you the kind of person that maybe is justin a supermarket, you know, just out in town?
And people just approach you and absolutestrangers end up divulging their whole life
(02:18:14):
journey with you.
These are like indicators about what is thedream?
What is the mesh message and the lesson, thatthat unique perspective that lies inside you
that is like a natural gravitational pull?
And you don't have to overthink it.
And it's about surrendering to what that is.
You so much, Sabrina.
(02:18:36):
Thank you for sharing.
You're welcome.
Sorry, can't see anything, my end.
Thank you so much.
Oh, you're welcome.
I know you kind of slightly froze.
Well, the next speaker I do want to bring up,and I've known her for, we've known each other
(02:18:56):
for quite some time, and she is an she's soincredible that I am so excited to hear her
speak.
She is Mosa Bellatram.
She is hosting with me hey there Mosa oh hi heyI'm gonna
(02:19:19):
be quiet I'm gonna be quiet
Okay.
We'll just talk about Sabrina as well and Ithink the takeaway that I got from Sabrina
first of all, she I mean that was justincredible knowing like, you know, being you
and for most being us, it it it takes a lotbecause you know, how do we become you, be that
(02:19:42):
authentic you?
What was your takeaway?
What what is being you?
What does that mean?
Because it could be challenging.
Okay, how do I need to be me?
You know, it's, you know, it's her her life andher decision is to embrace herself with, her
(02:20:03):
family, right?
With her children.
And I love how she shared each of her childrenwith such And
then her children are amazing.
Our children, they are amazing.
Absolutely.
I I know most of them and they truly areamazing.
But you know what?
As a family, as a unit, they are just anincredible family.
That's great.
Yeah.
And I'm glad that she shares.
So, hopefully that you guys gonna followSabrina and can follow her, you know, on social
(02:20:28):
media and just, you know, continue to to learnfrom her.
I'm sorry that we didn't hear the the ending,right?
You know, how she closed it but I'm sure thatis amazing.
And, Sabrina, thank you very much.
That was a beautiful share.
Absolutely.
The next guest, the next speaker we have comingup, and I know this individual, I've known her
(02:20:53):
for quite some time, we've done a lot of thingstogether and it truly is exciting to have her
co host this show with me.
And, her and I, we have, you know, when wedecided to do this, it truly was, you know,
(02:21:13):
something that I had at the back of my mind andI shared with Moses.
So the speaker that we have coming up now, hername is Mosa Bellatram.
Mosa Bellatram is a powerhouse.
She is a TEDx speaker, a business mentor, andshe is a facilitator of for the unstoppable
(02:21:35):
her.
She is absolutely doing a fantastic job.
And she produces and hosts the hit digital TVshow, Lessons from Failures.
She is featured on Fox's San Diego and p p Pix11 New York.
(02:21:58):
Her ex expertise and story have beenhighlighted by Good Morning, Las Vegas, Fox
forty, Yahoo finances, Forbes, HITV ten and somuch more.
There's just so much accolade that Moza has.
(02:22:19):
She is also the LLC and Forbes Coaches CouncilHonoree for 2023 and 2024.
Mosabella and her team of experts help businessowners rise as the best known, because the best
(02:22:40):
known beats the best in your industry.
And she increases their impact and passion fortheir greatest success.
So with Moses dynamic leadership and passionfor transformation, Mosabella will guide you
(02:23:03):
through every breakthrough moment to be theunstoppable her.
I'm excited to bring a Mosabella.
Mosabella, welcome, my co host.
Yeah, thank you, Alka.
Thank you very much.
Well, thank you for the beautiful share.
But most importantly, everyone, I just want tosay that I am one of you.
(02:23:28):
That's it.
I'm a woman.
A little voice, started with a little voice butwith a big dream.
Alright?
So, today, first of all, a very it's my honorand I'm very humble to be able to share the
stage with all of the amazing speakers and Ihope that you have been with us since we
(02:23:48):
started because every single one brought insuch beautiful experience.
Their talk is very touching and it's soinspiring and if you're watching the replay,
make sure that you, you know, put a commenthere because, you know, this unstoppable her
community that Alka Sharma created is for you,for all of us to be there, to empower, and
(02:24:11):
encourage, and and support one another.
We lift one another up, right?
Because that's all we need.
So, what you what I would like to to to saybefore I start is that I will have ten minutes
with you, right?
And then we're going to close the show.
(02:24:31):
So, stay with me if you, you know, if you canand I you for staying, you know, this long with
us, with all of us.
Everything that you learn, the knowledge youlearn, you are here for a reason.
But the knowledge will become useless if youdon't apply.
So, I'm hoping that you you've been takingnotes just like I did, right?
(02:24:51):
And I've been doing that, you know, pages ofnotes but you need to apply.
You need to take the next step.
So, I'm here my talk in the next nine minutesthat I'm gonna share with you is going to be
about you is about branding.
You are the brand.
The brand before the brand.
And why is that?
(02:25:11):
Because most people will think that branding isabout a logo, a website, a color, or a clever
tagline.
Not true.
Branding is nothing is is nothing to do withwith with what you do.
But everything to do with how you leadyourself.
(02:25:32):
Right?
A few years ago and a few years ago, I wasgoing through my own divorce.
And after that, I met a wonderful person.
We engaged.
And then he died for cancer.
For the longest time, I was a wife.
(02:25:54):
I was a caregiver.
I prioritized everybody else before me.
I was the bottom of the totem pole.
I think that's the evening.
And at that very moment, that was the firsttime that I had to ask myself, what do I live
(02:26:15):
for?
At that point, I decided to start my ownbusiness.
So you see, I did not start my brand or mybusiness by being the the most trendy or the
most loud or the loudest person in the room.
I started my business and my brand in themiddle of grief, in the middle of reinvention
(02:26:40):
when all the polish was stripping away from me.
And the reason that I'm sharing this story withyou is because maybe you have been there
yourself or maybe you are there right now.
Maybe you are just wondering like after thedivorce, what's next?
(02:27:01):
Or even wondering who who you are.
Because now, at this point, without without thetitles, without the expectations, without the
responsibilities, and without all the storiesthat you use to tell yourself.
(02:27:24):
I'm telling you that this is where your truebrand begins, Not with what the world see you.
Right?
Not with what you want the world to see you,but what you believe in yourself, but no one is
watching.
So today, I'm gonna share with you three thingsthat will help you to build your brand the
right way.
(02:27:45):
Number one is your brand is the energy that youlead with.
Your brand is the energy that you lead with.
Here's the truth that most marketing peopledon't tell you.
People don't buy your products.
They buy your presence.
Why do I say that?
People buy your presence.
(02:28:07):
When you walk into the room, is the energy, theemotional energy that you bring with you
regardless if it's online or it is is or or ifit is in person, right?
What people feel is what what what you want isthat what do you want people to to to feel?
(02:28:28):
What you want people to take away afterexperiencing you?
So to to to make my point is that one of myclients that I worked with and she was, you
know, she was a nurse, right?
She's in health care and she created herbusiness by selling the the the first aid kit
and you know, she was struggling, you know, forthe longest time, she put a lot of heart, a lot
(02:28:52):
of expertise into that kit but she couldn'tsell it and then she worked with me and then
we, I asked her like, what is the reason whylike people, what would be the reason for
people to spend 10 times the money to buy yourkit versus going to a drugstore, you know, CVS
or Walgreens to buy it or even get it cheaperon Amazon.
(02:29:14):
After we worked with that, so now she is on theright track.
She is selling more.
She is a speaker.
She was invited on a lot of podcast because sheis so in alignment with what she is doing.
So, for you, after today, right?
Before you post anything online, then askyourself, what is the message?
(02:29:38):
What is the feeling that I want people to takeaway with from my post, right, from your post?
People follow you for three reasons.
For entertainment, for education, forinspiration.
So which one that you want to leave them with?
So that's number one.
(02:29:59):
Now number two.
Number two is your brand must come fromhealing.
What do I say?
Why do I say that?
Because after the divorce, we often try to todo everything fast, right?
To build everything fast.
Build the new image, the new goal, the newpartner, the new life.
(02:30:21):
But if you build it from the place of pain,your brand will speak pain.
But if you build your brand from the place ofhealing, it will become a lighthouse.
So when I, you know, after, you know, I wentthrough my divorce and, you know, after my
fiance died, I wanted to do the same thing,right?
(02:30:44):
I wanted to build everything very fast.
But then at some point, I had to sit down and Ihad to ask, is this what I truly wanted to
build?
And after I died, is this the voice, themessage that I want people to remember?
(02:31:05):
So I had to go back and I had to I had to do myinner work and had to rebuild myself in order
for my brand to be in alignment with my corevalues, with my true belief.
So you so so this is what I would like for youfor you to to take away with.
(02:31:27):
That when you are doing this, because I did itby myself, right?
But we should not do this by by yourself, byourselves.
I did, but I don't want you to.
Now you are here, you have the whole, you know,community and you are in unstoppable hurry.
You in a great community.
If you've heard the speakers, you know that youhave the support.
When you build it with the right support, theright system, and the right strategy, then your
(02:31:52):
brand is going to position you in the rightmarket, in the right position you in the right
way.
When you and remember this.
I want I, you know, I wrote this down.
I would like to share this with you that yourhuge story is somebody else's guidance.
(02:32:13):
Your huge story may be somebody else's survivalguide.
So that leads to the number three that I wouldlike for you to take away with, that you cannot
use the legacy filter.
What do I mean by that?
That I have three questions, and I would likefor you to have those three questions to ask
yourself.
Number one is the business, right?
(02:32:38):
Whatever the business that you're doing, isthis aligned with my future self?
Not your past self, right?
Not who you used to be in the past, but yourfuture self.
Number two, will this create the emotionalexperience that I want other people to have?
(02:32:59):
And number three, will this matter ten yearsfrom now to my children or to the people that I
choose to serve?
The people that you choose to serve because youwant to serve a lot of people.
But who do you want?
Who do you choose to serve?
So when I started my business, I, you know, alot of and and I think you too, and I think,
(02:33:24):
you know, most people can resonate, right?
You try to do everything by yourself.
I did not have this guidance.
If I did, my business would have been verydifferent, you know, a few years ago, not, you
know, not until today.
So, I build this craft your brand legacy guideand it's right there on my bio.
If you go to my Facebook, it's right there andit's free download and I would like for you all
(02:33:47):
to have it.
So, you wouldn't have to struggle the way Idid, you know, years ago.
So, your your story, my ladies, ladies andgentlemen, if you're listening to this, your
story is the gold for your brand.
Your story is the gold for your brand.
(02:34:07):
You are not starting over.
You're starting higher.
And the woman who the and the woman who who isbecoming is she is the brand.
She is the business.
She is the message.
And she is the voice clear and so true.
And I'm gonna leave you with this.
(02:34:28):
When your brand is built with the rightstrategy, the right system, and the right
structure, you will become the beacon of lightto the right client, the right the right
clients, the right opportunities, and most ofall, the right you.
My name is Mosabella, and thank you so much forbeing with us here today.
(02:34:53):
Thank you so much, Melissa, for sharing.
That truly is amazing because the reason why Isay because a branding is everything a lot.
Oftentimes people think branding is your logo,but that is not necessarily the case.
But thank you for just highlighting exactlywhat a true brand, needs to be.
(02:35:17):
Toby.
Toby, great to see you back at Brenda.
Thank you.
We're back.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Putting all of this together behind the scenes,it will not be possible without you.
So thank you.
Oh, I enjoy it.
It's part of what I do.
(02:35:40):
Absolutely.
Well, do you know what?
I I'm gonna be the first to start off sincejust the four of us, but today has just been
just absolute just incredible, you know from astandpoint that when I when I decided to do
this event to put it together was literallyabout two months ago.
(02:36:03):
And it started with a just a vision.
It started with a dream that I truly wanted tohelp and inspire other women.
You know and that's what it truly is that whenwe when I set out to have that at the
forefront, it truly just today has just becomea reality.
(02:36:25):
And so I'm just so grateful to have thisplatform that, you know, I can do this and
without your, with your support, Render andwith all the incredible speakers, I do have to
say, it takes a village, it takes a village toput this event together and it would not have
(02:36:52):
been possible, you know, without everyonesupporting to this and especially the viewers.
And you know I want to I want to thank everyonewatching online.
It truly is incredible to have your support, tobe here with us on a Saturday.
You know, so we just wanna thank you.
(02:37:15):
And I'm excited too.
Everybody was amazing.
Together a great lineup.
Oh, yes.
Everyone has done amazing.
These And
I have some questions for Moza.
That brand before the brand, I'm I'm taking it.
I'm I'm gonna say it's yours.
(02:37:38):
Yeah.
Thank you.
Because you are the original.
Yeah.
That was powerful.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Thank you.
And, Alka, thank you.
I've learned I've learned from all of you.
I'm sorry.
I said that I've learned from all of you, andthis is amazing.
And I would like to say thank you, Alka, forfor for having me and and connecting me with
(02:38:00):
all the amazing speakers because like, youknow, ladies and gentlemen, you know, out
there, I didn't know any of the speakers beforethis.
This is all algae.
Like, you know, this is her network.
This is her her powerful support, right?
And now, she is so generous to share this allamazing individuals with you.
So, you know, I hope that you that you youappreciate that.
(02:38:21):
I appreciate it.
Alka your story is very empowering because it'sit tells us that there's life after divorce.
That the life Your doesn't identity doesn'tstop.
Actually it's a brand new beginning to beanybody or anything you want.
Absolutely.
Your divorce doesn't need to define you.
(02:38:42):
It does not define you.
You know, you take that ownership.
You you dominate and you you own it.
Basically, you rewrite your story.
You know, and if I can share my story everyeverywhere on any platform, on any stages, I
think that is what I would want to do.
(02:39:05):
Absolutely.
You know, you need to be empowered.
You need to be empowered not to be in thatvictim mode.
You need to you know, just shut this off, dustit off, and learn and navigate how we're gonna
move to that next best life.
You know, with with divorce, it's not just likea divorce of a marriage.
(02:39:29):
The the you need a business partner, when abusiness breaks up, when you leave a church,
when you leave a relationship of any kind, it'salmost like a divorce.
It it's it's tough.
It
is tough.
It is tough that a lot of women, you know, whenthey do go through that, most women will just
(02:39:50):
maybe quit or they just, you know, give up.
And I
think yeah.
Go ahead, And I think you're I think you'reabsolutely right, Elke.
And and this is where every woman that spoke onhere today showed the power of of of not
quitting.
And I think that is is the message that has toresonate.
(02:40:11):
And I've I teach it in in all my books.
If you don't quit, you can't lose.
It's it's impossible.
If you don't quit, you can't lose.
You can get knocked down a thousand times.
But if you get up a thousand and one, you'restill in the fight.
And so I think that listening to every lady onhere and again, I wanna say, thank you so much
for aligning me with such a powerful, beautifulwomen because I'm I'm in heaven.
(02:40:33):
I got eight beautiful women that I'm getting tobe wrapped around.
So thank you for that.
But but more importantly, you know, listeningto these women saying, hey, you know what?
I didn't quit.
I didn't give up.
I didn't let that divorce define me.
I defined it.
I found my strengths.
I found my inner core.
I found my passion.
(02:40:54):
I redeveloped and redesigned my internalpassion and then went out and conquered the
world.
That's the message.
Absolutely.
A 100%.
And, Toby, you're very lucky surrounded byeight wonderful women.
That's right.
It's a it's an honor.
It's it's a true honor.
And and and for all the people that are onhere, hearing and seeing all the chatter and
(02:41:17):
the chat and all the that, you you know thatthe message is being resonated.
You know that you're making a difference andwhen you have this many people respond, you
know you're doing the right thing.
And that's the empowerment behind thisplatform.
Absolutely.
And for those of
you who are are still watching, share it out.
(02:41:38):
Let other people see that there's life beyondwhatever it is you're going through.
Right now, whatever you're going through isjust a little blip in time.
I know it feels like the whole world's comingdown.
But it is temporary.
It's temporary.
Exactly.
Being inside that cocoon is temporary.
You're not meant to be inside that cocoon, andthat's my book as well.
(02:42:01):
You're not meant to be in that cocoon forever,but it's to find, get out, break through from
that cocoon.
So, you know
You know, not that emerges from it.
Yeah.
Well and, you know, that's a great analogybecause going through a life struggle like
that, you're in a dark place.
(02:42:21):
You're you're feeling constricted.
You're feeling, powerless.
Inside that cocoon, you're hopeless, helpless.
That is an amazing analogy.
It's just a rezo, that's how slow I am.
But then if you don't quit, if you don't giveup and you break through that, a beautiful
butterfly, a beautiful new transformation takesplace, and now you get to soar the world.
(02:42:43):
I love Brenda, I'm using that in my next book.
Become I see.
The star of the cocoon and become thebutterfly.
Well, here's the thing, though.
You have to make sure that cocoon is destroyedso you don't go back in it.
That's right.
Something bigger and better than that cocoon.
It has to be destroyed.
You have to bury it.
You have to move on and fly away and soar tonew heights.
(02:43:06):
That's right.
I love it.
Yeah.
That's wonderful.
So great.
That was a great.
It was a great event.
Well, thank you again for Alka to meet, youknow, this is your vision.
And, you know, here we are because somebodystarted with a vision, and we all put it
together.
This is a teamwork.
(02:43:26):
And thank you, Brenda, for working, you know,very diligently, you know, behind the scene,
like, not today, like, even, you know, daysbefore.
And Toby, I know that you're you have a verybusy schedule, but you spend time with us from
the beginning to the end.
Like, I really appreciate you.
Tam is the most valuable gift that you evergive to anybody.
(02:43:47):
And you guys, like, you got Toby's gift, youknow, being here with all the women.
That's right.
Hey.
I'm in heaven, guys.
I'm in heaven, and and you guys can all behaters all you want.
I'm loving this.
But, Alka, like I told you, Mosa, I will be onany stage you guys want to put together because
you have such a powerful message that everymale and female needs to hear.
(02:44:11):
I have two books out.
So so and I'm gonna plug real quick because Ididn't plug earlier.
So I have two books out that are all so I havenine books out total.
But when I when I wrote this book, TheBattlefield Mind, and I shared it with a coach,
one of my coaches, they said, hey, that's apowerful book.
That's amazing on that.
But who are you who are you who are youattracting?
(02:44:32):
I said, well, I'm attracting people that needto understand the power of the money.
He said, yeah.
That's the alpha male.
You got a a fighter on there.
You got a male Spartan warrior on there.
I said, you're right.
So I wrote two more books out out of this.
One of them is about that executive womantrying to climb the corporate ladder, has that
(02:44:54):
battle of male stereotypic leaders, all that,and she's trying to overpower that and be
respected in the workforce, number one book.
And then I went one step further and wrote thebook of the mom, mother, wife, spouse, worker.
She has three jobs.
And this is when I was writing that book, itreally, I was like, holy cow.
(02:45:18):
Because I'm a man, I'm a CEO, I have one job todo and that is to to lead and provide, right?
But when you take a woman who is married withchildren and working, she has three jobs, she
has a family to take care of first andforemost, four jobs.
She has a family, she has her children, she hasher husband, she has a spouse, she has a
(02:45:43):
career, and those three things cloud her up somuch that she leaves number one out, which is
herself.
And when I wrote that book, I really tried toempower how important it is for for a female to
be able to rise above all the noise in theworld.
But if they leave themselves out, like wetalked about today, if they forget about
(02:46:06):
themselves because they're so busy taking careof the children, making sure they get off to
school, making sure they get fed, taking careof the husband, make sure he gets fed because
he's the biggest baby of them all.
You all know that the male is the biggest babyof them all.
Even though you all got rid of them, they werethe biggest baby when you have them.
And then they got the career that they'restriving to say, this is me.
(02:46:27):
The career is me.
The career is who I want to be labeled as.
Yes, I love being labeled as a mom.
Yes, I'm okay being labeled as a spouse, butthe career is something I'm doing for myself.
But then where is where is the time given foryourself?
Where is the time given for you to be the bestyou?
And that's what the message was today.
And it's so empowering and everybody needs torecognize and really accept the fact you guys
(02:46:53):
got a lot that you have to face already andwhen you get a bum head male in your life, it
doesn't make things any easier.
And I'm not a bum head but I can be a bum head.
We we send them to you, Toby.
Bring them over here.
Send them.
We'll fix them.
She goes, we'll put them through the unshakableself.
We'll get their shit right, and then they'll beamazing throughout.
(02:47:15):
Okay?
Awesome.
That's a great plan.
I love it.
I love
Love it.
Thank you so much.
I And they won't be trapped inside a cocoon aswell.
That's right.
I'm telling you, when you said that, I waslike, holy shit.
That's powerful.
Because if you recognize inside that cocoon,you're helpless.
(02:47:35):
It's dark.
You have no control over anything.
You're just stuck.
Exactly.
But
you don't give up.
You don't quit.
You break through.
You evolve.
You wait for the right moment in time.
You break through, destroy it, and fly off tonew heights.
I love that metaphor.
Holy cow.
I promise you.
I'm writing a book right now.
(02:47:55):
I showed Brenda last night.
Start writing I'm gonna write another one.
It's gonna be all about the cocoon to abutterfly in life.
I love that.
Isn't it good?
Because, I mean, you know, when I think aboutit, I was, like, protected.
I was sheltered inside that cocoon.
But you know what?
We can break through if we want to.
And I think that's the essence.
(02:48:16):
That's the message that, you know, do youreally want?
How badly do you wanna improve your life?
How badly do you wanna rebuild?
How badly do you want to forge success?
Only if you want, then you can do it.
That's the million dollar question.
That's the million dollar question.
(02:48:36):
And that's where yeah.
If you want it, it's there.
If you want it, the support is there.
If you want it, the products, the programs,everything is there.
But the one thing that isn't there from us,from you, from is the want.
We can't give you the want.
We can't make you want it.
You have to want it.
And then you have nothing but a completesupport system, a complete ecosystem, complete
(02:48:59):
community that will wrap their arms around youand lift you up and drive you forward.
Absolutely.
Yes.
Yes.
We will.
Absolutely.
You know, we can do this all day.
If you guys if you got nothing going on, I Imean, I've already canceled all we can sit here
and sit all day long.
You ain't gonna hurt my feelings.
No.
(02:49:20):
But you know what?
It's been really it's been incredible.
Absolutely.
All of the speakers and I'm just so much ingratitude right now.
It should've been an incredible day.
We've been here for three hours, but threehours just went by so quick.
Like that.
Yep.
Like
that.
Exactly.
(02:49:41):
You know what?
Alka, Moza, start planning the next one.
Start laying it out there.
Start building that that foundation.
We will support you.
We will grow this thing beyond.
Because here's the deal.
I don't know how many watched, how many willsee this hundred, two hundred, 300, 400.
It doesn't matter.
It's just a small percentage of what themessage we need to get out to.
(02:50:01):
It's just a small scratch of the surface.
If if
somebody hears it and does something, that'sall that matters.
That's all that matters.
And so we need to get this message out more andmore and more, bigger and bigger and bigger.
K?
Exactly.
Let's do that.
Let's do it.
Well, I'll tell you that.
Like to
what would you like to tell your viewers, youryour folks that are watching in parting?
(02:50:23):
What's a valuable piece of advice to give them?
Absolutely.
Just want to thank each and everyone who hastaken the time out.
First of all, I want congratulate each andeveryone because this show was not about me,
it's about you.
And you have taken the time to be with us forthe past three hours that has just gone by so
(02:50:47):
quick.
And so that is the essence to me.
That's that's what matters most is that you arehere and you have taken out your valuable time
to be here with us on a Saturday.
We have learnt from amazing speakers.
Each and everyone has shared incrediblehighlights from the energy, whatever you want
(02:51:13):
to attract, whether it's a love life, a career,a business, or finance, it comes down to you.
What is that energy that you exude?
What is that energy or that mindset that reallywill either help you move forward in your life
(02:51:33):
or will hinder you back.
If you're always a complainer, if you're alwaysyour mood is always negative.
Are you attracting to what it is that you want?
Also to being you, being you, being authenticyou, being the the woman who is rewriting her
(02:51:54):
next chapter to being to living a life offulfillment, of authenticity.
And I, you know, for me, that was the biggestlesson in my life when I was going through my
divorce, but I was not authentic.
I was always pleasing people.
I was always being in that mindset that, youknow, I was less worthy.
(02:52:21):
I will not be successful.
But you've heard from everyone the ownership asyou start today to living that life, starting
to rewrite the next chapter of your life and weare so excited for you.
I am so excited for you that you are gonnarise.
(02:52:42):
You are gonna dominate.
Dominate anything that you set out to do.
Why?
Because you've made that choice.
You've made that internal choice that this isyour time.
This is your moment.
You're here to shine.
And I'm gonna take on personal experience.
That was not me.
When I was going through that moment in mylife.
(02:53:06):
But you today, you've got the support, you haveheard from the speakers who are, you know,
sharing with you as to how you can do it andwhy you need to do it.
So in closing, is to become the best version ofyourself possible to becoming the you that you
(02:53:32):
know inside of your heart, you've alwayswanted.
But because of the adversities that you mayhave gone through, it was snipped on the carpet
like it didn't matter.
But today, you matter to us.
And for that, I'm so grateful to each andeveryone who I stayed with that for the past
(02:53:55):
three hours.
So thank you so much to each and everyone.
And Thank thank
you all.
To be unstoppable.
Absolutely.
Thank you all.
Yes.
Thank you.
Make sure you go out and follow the speakers.
Let them know if there's something thatresonated with them.
Share some of your stories.
Find your voice because your story matters.
(02:54:17):
Go check us all out.
Follow, Alka, see what's going on in her life.
Stay in touch with her.
And I'm sure you can stay tuned for anothershow.
For See
you guys.
Yep.
Bye bye.