October 22, 2025 • 35 mins
Welcome back girlies! I'm sadly not joined by Jacquie this episode (listen for the full story), but I'm giving you the full rundown of the famous hens weekend on my lonesome. Then, Blakey and I get into more of your dilemmas and do our best to help you out, we were SHOOK by some of these! See you next week when I'm joined by Riley xx
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I was thinking if I told you the real things
that I'm feeling and like, things that I'm angry about,
and you would judge me. Hello, guys, I have sadly
some disappointing news for you.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
Jackie Alexander is not in the room with us right now.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
She is back in Perth recovering from her hands. We
obviously wanted to have her on, but we will have
her on in the near near future, in the next
couple of weeks, so do not fret. But that means
I will have to give you the bachelorette recap all
on my lonesome. And boy, was at a fucking weekend,
all right, We're not here to be demure. I had
a far, far too large night the night before I
(00:41):
left for her bachelorette, so I didn't get to leave
to go to the bachelorette as early as I would
have liked. It was stupid, silly, one of those nights
where you really don't think it's going to be as
big as it is. But I was having a lot
of fun. I was with my friends whatever. I don't
know what I was hoping. I'm not someone that can
back it up. If you know me, I'm like one
day drinker. And then I'm like, don't fucking talk to me,
(01:02):
put my phone on D and D and like, bright hand,
I don't exist. But that was obviously not an option.
So yeah, I didn't get to leave as early as
I wanted to. Luckily, Ava wasn't too far ahead of me.
We were both driping up separately, and what would have
been a one and a half hour drive there was
so many roadworks it was bumping a bumper ntil like
I reckon the last forty minutes. And I've recently discovered
I can't really drink caffeine because it makes me really sleepy,
(01:25):
and I think that's a symptom of pretty sure I
have ADHD, but I need to get that diagnosed, which
is something anyway I will get there. But if you
have undiagnosed ADHD, or if you have ADHD, caffeine can
make you really sleepy. And I've realized recently that like,
I'm worse off when I drink coffee than.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
When I don't.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
Anyway, So I raw dogged that fucking three hour flight.
At that three hour fucking drive, no caffeine, no nothing.
I got a cheeseburger and it made me want to
fucking throw up. And I get there, everyone's ready. Everyone
looked beautiful, The fucking venue is beautiful, and everyone was great.
It was one of those ones where it's like you
don't really know everyone, but then like the moment you
(02:02):
all like have a drink and sit down and have
a chat, like you all get along so well and
it was so much fun. We played that first night
was Cowboys and Caviar, which was really cute. So that
two little fucking cavia cans. How much would you think
one of those cans would cost?
Speaker 2 (02:16):
Blake? Did you see it?
Speaker 3 (02:18):
Like I did. I'm so bad at this because I
actually don't like caviar.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
I do like it. I'm abougie bitch.
Speaker 4 (02:25):
I don't want to embarrass myself. But let's say like
eight hundred dollars.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Oh see, you know what, I fucking hate. You didn't
do this on purpose, but you know when you try
and like say to someone, I guess how much is
stress cost that I just bought? Like it was fucking
crazy and they go like five grand and you're like, no,
it was like eight hundred bucks. But like now it
seems like it wasn't that much because you've just like
over guessed.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
It, so it's going to be like two.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
It was three hundred dollars, okay.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
For two cans, and we ate one of the cans
and then the other one was still sitting there. We
were going to get to it. It was sitting on ice.
The ice melted and the can submerged in the water.
Speaker 2 (03:00):
And got filled with water.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Therefore we couldn't eat it anymore. So that was like
three hundred bucks down the fucking drain because it was fulled. Anyway,
that night was like chill, actually lie not chill, but
we had the big day tomorrow, so we all kind
of went upstairs.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
There was a TV.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
Jackie's sister, Evie had organize all these games, which was
so cute, like she got Jackie to answer these questions,
which she'd also got Jackie's fiance to answer the same
and like see if they got the answers right, or
we all had to send in a funny photo of
Jackie and it was like who sent that? And like
where's that photo from?
Speaker 2 (03:32):
So that night was just fun. Everyone was in a
really good mood.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Jackie was wasted, but in the best fucking way, like
having a blast and it makes you so happy. Like
seeing someone enjoying themselves, like on a day that's like
really meant for them. So then the next day I
was running on fumes. But we move and we keep going,
and that was the beautiful, big long lunch slim Arran's
day I did. Unfortunately, sadly, I did notice that my
(03:58):
name was like, you know, your names, like a suggested
sort of search on like videos. Jackie like would have
a video of like everyone sitting there in the breakfast
like outfits steing, and my name was the search bar.
And I'm like, it's probably because everyone's like, where the
fuck is easy and why is she not in that?
Speaker 2 (04:13):
I was just sleep.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
I needed the sleep, you know, I really did. And
I got up, like actually got up like twelve, and
then we all got ready for the long lunch. The
caterers of the food was fucking insane.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
We had.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
I only say this because like I care about menus,
and I'm not sure if other people care about menus,
but I'll tell you what. We ate mozzarella and tomato
roon greini, which I think easily the best roon genie
I ever had, Like this whipped tocotto eggplant sort of
crostinything and then steak with Jimmy Tueri Volkarrigatoni Pesto passed up.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
Fuck, I'm so hungry.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
This is like your version of parents, I know, I know.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
And then salad, which you know we put on the plate,
but do we actually eat anyway. It was incredible. There
was a drag queen that came. She had so much fun.
Everything like it was very smooth with sailing, like there
wasn't the drama that I feel like usually comes with
like a big group of girls being away on something.
But I think when you're all there for like a
common fucking cause of like make sure this girl has
a good time, there isn't gonna be any issues, you know.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
Yeah, and there wasn't any.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
But then the wake up at nine am was brutal
to clean the house and drive back fucking home.
Speaker 4 (05:18):
So we actually we have house parties at ours. We
have a rule now at the end of the night
when we were so drying clean yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
Yeah, no, no, people did do that. And look, I
sound like a fucking cow. I can't take credit for it.
Speaker 3 (05:31):
N I'm not a good cleaner.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
I will clean whatever you need me to do if
you tell me what to do. Yeah, if it's not
my house, I don't really know how to clean it.
And I know that's really fucking crazy, but like clinician, I.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
Don't know where anything goes. I don't know what you
want me to do with this.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
This there was a lot of stuff that was like
half of them were the houses things, and half of
them were stuff that girls were taking back home with them,
like glasses and things. And there's like sixteen people there
and I'm like, you, guys, I'm gonna be honest with you.
You wouldn't You don't want me there, No, you will
get it done easier if I'm not in that room
with you.
Speaker 4 (06:03):
It's literally like I won't be any help. And also
I feel like in a group setting there are like
very assumed leaders, and there.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Are leaders and they take that role and like I'm
there for the var like you, you don't bring me.
Speaker 4 (06:15):
Along to clean and I like to have fun when cleaning.
Let's talk.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
Yeah, And I was on my deathbed.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
I'd had less sleep than I think I've ever had
since I've been to a festival. Like that was like
giving festival for me because of that stupid fucking Thursday night,
which was all my faults so like there was no
complaining to be had. I did it to myself. Let's
fucking pick up. Yeah, but it was. It was so
much fun and it was beautiful and yeah, everything went
really well. But that drive home was hell on a stick,
(06:43):
to be quite. Frank got home, lay horizontally Watchhouse of
the Dragon with Riley and Tessa, and had Bolona's for dinner.
Speaker 3 (06:51):
Sunday. Sunday.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
That was Sunday.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
Okay, how are you recovering now?
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Monday? Oh, Monday, I didn't have.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
I usually I have my PTE at ten thirty, so
that would that would have been canceled. I'm gonna be
completely honest with you, but I didn't. My first thing
I had on Monday was actually my psychologists appointment at
one amazing. So psychologist and patient confidentiality doesn't really count
for me, do you know what I mean? Like I
can tell you guys, like what she was annoying me. Okay,
(07:21):
So so I went to my first psychologist a moment
probably in like four years last week, and it was
a new tick. And psychologists are like dating, you really
need to find that chemistry with someone like it might
even take like a couple people to meet before you go, yeah, okay,
this is someone.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
That I feel like I can actually talk to.
Speaker 1 (07:40):
The first the Chickasaw last week made me feel like
I was the craziest person alive. Like, so I walk in,
I'm late always, I'm probably like three minutes late, like
nothing heck, but I did text ahead of time and
say I'm running. Five minutes later, I walk in. There's
no one at like the front desk or anything.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
So i'm a little bit.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
It's really dark, like sort of moody. That made it
like moody calming.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
It was cool. And then my dad calls me. I
don't like, fuck really right.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
Now, but I answered because it was coming from a
number that it didn't say dad, like it was a
random number, and.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
So I thought maybe it was her, and I was
gonna be.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Like, hey, like I'm right here, So I answer, it's
my dad.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
Send me the Apple code, Send me the Apple code.
I'm like, whoa, whoa. The whole room.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
This is like a quiet, quiet, quiet building. And he's
I'm like, why are you so fucking angry right now?
And my Dad's like, not some crazy angry person, he
was just he gets really frustrated because our Apple TVs
have been basically, if he ever needs to get a
code from Apple on his phone or computer, it randomly
comes to my phone and we do not know how
to fix it. And it's been like that for five years.
So he and he gets angry at me, like he
(08:42):
thinks I've done it on purpose, like I've linked him
to me.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
And parents, hay when things don't work, Yeah, and.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
We don't know how to fix it.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
And I'm like, I don't want this life either that,
you know what I mean, Like, you can have your
fucking Apple codes.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
So I go, Dad, I'm.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
About to walk into a psycholgist moment. At this moment,
the lady opens the door. She's staring at me. She's
downing there, she's not saying anything, and Dad still screaming
in the phone.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Set me the up, God, send me the app. I
gotta go down.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
I'm brought the walking door, frock. It's like, oh, just
want to stop. And this lady's just standing there and
listening to me. And then I walk through the door
because she kind of rushes me through silently, and I
Dad's like, I don't care, I go down.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
I'm literally in the room right now.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Can I please call you back after No, it's come
there on the phone right now. I checked the phone.
There's no code. I say, no code, hang up. Lady
doesn't say anything. I sit down.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
She goes, wow, really just seems like you've just landed here.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
I was like, oh, I kind of took it as like,
you know, when someone's a bit chaotic and it kind
of seems like like they kind.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
Of just whoof PLoP themselves down.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
So I kind of took it more as that, and
I was like, oh, yeah, Like I feel like my
life is a bit My life is a bit chaotic,
like my mind and the way it works. Everything's always
like go, go go, and it's a bit like whoa.
I'm like, oh yeah, I feel like that tends to
be like me, you know, I'm always just like that
your turn, Your turn, Lady respond, do you know what
I mean? Give me something?
Speaker 3 (09:58):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (09:59):
Hello?
Speaker 1 (09:59):
Nothing nothing, no response. I'm like okay, Hi, She goes hello.
I'm like, fuck, I've got an hour of shit. She
was like a movie psychologist where they like leave that
open space for you in the hopes that you respond,
and I'm like, no, I'm done.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (10:15):
Like I've said you're not firstly really asking me anything,
except now you've asked me about my relationship with my
dad because for some reason that you think there's a
problem man, and there isn't. I'm like, okay, I guess
I guess I'll go. So I start talking for like
a couple of minutes and then probably thirty seconds, and
then I'm like I stop because I'm like, your turn,
I'm your mind.
Speaker 3 (10:36):
You're meeting, this is your first time.
Speaker 1 (10:38):
Yeah, you know, like, ask me some questions, get us
talking into like the root of why I'm here or
what things I want to fix. No, I guess I'm
taking the lead on this one.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
Woman. I'm like, fine, son.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
She leaves the silence, and I'm like, you know what,
I'm going to leave the silence too, So I don't
say anything either, God, And we sit there for ten
seconds and then she goes starts talking, and I'm like,
you could have done that ten seconds earlier and we
wouldn't be feeling this awkward. And I said to it,
I actually said to her because at this one I
was really annoyed because like I knew we weren't connecting.
(11:10):
I was thinking, if I told you the real things
that I'm feeling and like things that I'm angry about
and stuff that I want to solve here you would
judge me. So I knew immediately, like this is not
the right fit for me because I've had some amazing
psychologists that really helped me, and like I felt like
we were having a conversation, whereas I feel like you're
trying to make me show how crazy I am.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (11:30):
Like you're like waiting for me to crack and have
some like yelling and screaming fit and then you've like
you've earlier like I've done it.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
I've fixed her, she's hit it. No, I'm fine. I
need you to respond to me.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
And how much older was she if you don't mind me.
Speaker 2 (11:44):
She was probably thirty five.
Speaker 4 (11:46):
Yeah, it's interesting. It was just like how she opens,
it's actually trying to pull you back down to that.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
Yeah, okay, I've.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
Had you're making me feel weird.
Speaker 1 (11:55):
Like so I actually said to her, I know that
you guys do that thing where you like leave the
silence so I'll feel it. But like I'm kind of
done with what I've said, so like, if you can
help me out here, do you know what I mean,
like I could just talk to my fucking I could
just do this right now and talk to myself for all,
like I'm paying you to tell me what I need
to do. Yeah, anyway, I swore, and I was like,
(12:18):
you know, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Some people don't like swearing, and that's fine.
Speaker 1 (12:21):
But I said, I'm sorry, excuse my swearing, Like I
swear a lot, a little, I swear a little bit.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
She doesn't say anything.
Speaker 1 (12:29):
I'm like, fuck, oh my god, okay, fine, And then
I told her about my two breakups, as in very
briefly how they ended, because I think if you hear
them back to back, you're like, shit, go like, you
haven't had luck in the relationship department, do you know
what I mean? And she goes completely straight face like
she hasn't responded or she been shocked or anything. She
(12:50):
didn't even laugh. She goes, usually I tend to school
my features, but that is really shocking. I'm like, you
did school your features. You haven't done anything with your
face since I last started speaking. And then ten minutes left,
six minutes left, two minutes left. Whoa, You're meant to
make me lose myself in this hour and just like
(13:12):
chat and chat and chat.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
You're giving me a fucking countdown.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
I think I would have like actually drove myself.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
No, I was angry, And I think it's because I've
had some really good psychologists and I'm like, you're not it.
Maybe for some people, that is the route that people need,
but I don't want that movie psychologist that goes and
how does that make you feel?
Speaker 3 (13:32):
I've like I have had that.
Speaker 4 (13:34):
I feel like they all sadly fall into that because
they've been trained to do exactly that. Yeah, at least
get to know me and like I have gotten in
the very comfortable space with my therapist before they've leant
into that.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
Yeah, And I'm like, right now, I just feel like
you are trying.
Speaker 2 (13:51):
She was trying to be some really.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
Amazing psychologist that's like finding the solution, Like how does
that make you feel? And then yeah, everything will just
tell out of me and then I'm like, oh, I'm fixed. No,
I need you to actually like I need someone that's
going to like laugh with me of like something's fucked,
or like if I say, yeah, that girl's a huge bitch,
I want you to be like, yeah she is.
Speaker 4 (14:11):
Yeah, but you know what I mean I feel like
my last therapist as well, he would kind of like
structure our sessions.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
It's like this session I want to learn about high school.
I feel like I haven't heard enough about that.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
Yeah, even like pro and like asks you questions about it.
Whereas she left everything so open ended that I'm like,
this is the first time I've gone to therapy where
I don't have a specific solution I need fixed. I'm
going there because I feel like it's healthy and I
have a lot of things that run through my mind,
and I'm like, you know, it would be nice to
talk to a professional that can maybe like help me
clarify a lot of these thoughts.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
So when you just leave.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
It open ended like that and don't ask me anything,
I'm like, well, this really annoys me. But then I
have this as well, and then this person I really hate,
and then do you know what I mean, I'm like,
I don't know where to go from here. And then
when she counted me down and fucking tick see her,
she goes, all right, well, I think we book in
this appointment for next week. I'm like, yeah, you wish, buddy,
So I said, okay. I was trying to find an
(15:06):
email because she scares me, and I was like, I
need to cancel disappointment because it's.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
Not going to fucking happen.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
And I mum, then, because she's the one, like I
said last time, and it's like, you need to fucking
see someone. So I was like, okay, that she didn't work,
can you find me another one. She then finds me
another one and lo and behold. I was like, I've
recognized this name and it was the lady that helped
me through my breakup with my ex boyfriend and I
really liked her, so I was like, great, I will
just go back and see her. She was amazing. She
was a little bit older, probably like fifty something. She would,
(15:36):
you know, laugh with you and kind of make you
feel like what you were feeling wasn't crazy, and like
help you through things. So I was like, great, that
lady is amazing. I want to see her again. So
that was my excuse. I couldn't find an email, so
I was like, fuck, I'll have to call them. What
if she picks up? So I call and it's after
and like, according to Google, the place's closed. So I'm
(15:56):
like great, I'll leave a voicemail. Nope, they answer. I'm like, okay,
was it the same chick? It wasn't to be fair
In fairness, I don't know her name, so it could
have well.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
Been, but I don't think it was.
Speaker 1 (16:06):
And then I said, hey, like I want like thank
her please for a time.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
She was great.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
I just found out my old psychologists available, and I
think that that's a better fit for me. Can I
cancel that appointment? Like blah blah, thank you so much,
no worries. But I'm going to be passing this information
on and she might want to give you a call.
Speaker 3 (16:26):
No one does that.
Speaker 1 (16:27):
No. The whole problem is that me and so and
so let's call it Sarah can't commerse very well. So
I'd really prefer it if she didn't give me a call.
Speaker 3 (16:37):
Is she a text? Because I think she can text me.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
I won't reply.
Speaker 3 (16:40):
We have more chemistry, though we probably.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
Would at least she doesn't leave all those awkward silences
fuck me anyway. So that was I just want to
say it might not always work out the first time,
and that is okay. Yesterday I went to see my
old psychologist and it was weirdly so nostalgic because like
last I was there, I was in like a totally.
Speaker 2 (17:02):
Different place in my life.
Speaker 1 (17:03):
Like I was working at Lulu Lemon like once a
fucking week, fucking crying about God. We know, we all
know who. And she was like, oh, like I we're chatting,
and she's like, you tell me you don't still talk
to him.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
I'm like no, god no.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
But she was great and immediately like she just focused
on like one thing, and that was like my compulsion
and like all my fucking alarms and like my checking things.
Speaker 3 (17:26):
She's already like looking whereas this was just like.
Speaker 1 (17:29):
She remembered things about me, but she focused on like
one thing and was like, today we're just going to
focus on like breaths and taking like mindful breaths when
you feel overwhelmed and go that can wait till later.
I need to focus on the present I'm in right now.
And I'm like great, she's great. So that is a
journey that we'll be going through. But I'm like, I
don't enjoy psychology. But I'm like, like I don't enjoy
(17:50):
going to see a psychologist, you know, like no one does.
Speaker 3 (17:53):
I actually weirdly do freak, but I haven't been in the age.
Speaker 1 (17:57):
No, But it's like, yeah, it's not going to be
something that everyone loved to do. But I'm like, it's
gonna be helpful, and I do feel why not, Like
I feel like when as you get older, so many
moving parts in like life, and I'm like, I definitely
don't have a fucking hold on my life or things,
and my brain is always in overdrive and there's so
many different things going on that distressing me out at
all times. And I'm like, there's no harm. So I
(18:18):
think if you're thinking about it, you may as well
give it a go. And if you have a bad
experience like mine, at least it's a funny story.
Speaker 4 (18:22):
So yeah, And I think everyone's been through a therapist's breakup.
I had one. She was such a nice woman.
Speaker 3 (18:28):
I felt really bad like letting her go. But she
had this thing of like, whenever you're getting anxious thoughts,
speaking an Elmo voice at all?
Speaker 2 (18:37):
Oh no, what's an Elmo voice?
Speaker 3 (18:40):
Like you have to pretend you're anxious thoughts at Elmo
in your head And then I just like that instantly
gave me.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
The ear and I'm like, I don't like that, and
she revisiting them.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
Everything seemed a little bit childish, but.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
Like you're like do you know that I'm not twelve?
Speaker 4 (18:54):
Yeah, no, even like skewed younger. I was just like,
this seems like I mean hindergarten.
Speaker 1 (19:00):
Yeah, and it's like I don't feel like you're going
to really help me get the crux of my adult issues.
Speaker 2 (19:06):
Voice.
Speaker 3 (19:06):
I moved on to a super hot guy and he was.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
I couldn't see if I had a super hot guy,
I'd be like, I'm perfect.
Speaker 2 (19:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (19:14):
No, I was like I played into I don't think
I was being authentic.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
Yeah, it's like, oh, you'll know why I'm here. I
don't know. I'm pretty perfect. Everything's really good, Thank you.
Speaker 3 (19:25):
How are you?
Speaker 4 (19:25):
He would like explain things to me, and like at
points back Blake and I'd just like la la la
name back there wasn't getting very productive and it's like
double rand paying therapy.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
Therapy is fucking expensive, so pricey.
Speaker 3 (19:41):
Yeah, like I do want to go back.
Speaker 1 (19:43):
You should get a mental mental getting a mental health plan.
Like it's like a ten pack where I feel like
they're way cheap because you get them back on Medicare
or something.
Speaker 4 (19:49):
So I don't want to spread misinformation here, but i'd
actually like to hear if anyone has a similar experience.
I have every time been on the ten step mental
health care plan. Either I can't act us my Mandy care,
which is a huge possibility, or it just doesn't change
any thing. It has not changed my fees and I've
never got money back. Right, Well, I love it that car.
Speaker 1 (20:11):
Yeah, you feel like you're you leave that room and
you're a better person, even though you've like, even if
you don't take any of the steps on board, you're like,
I am working towards a better meat. Tap that car.
Speaker 3 (20:21):
Yeah. Yeah, in that session, you've talked about how you
feel like a piece of shit, but you've walked a
piece of shit.
Speaker 1 (20:26):
But I'm aware, I'm a self aware piece of shit,
and you come out of the house. So yeah, that
was my Monday. And I did some other things but
nothing important. But that is enough about me. Now we
are getting into your problems and doing it helped me out.
Part two. All right, Number one? How is it love
(20:48):
the body? This happened a few months ago now, but
I'm really interested in your opinion and how you would
have handled the situation. I want to preface guys, the
situations I went through when I was younger.
Speaker 2 (20:58):
I did not.
Speaker 1 (20:59):
Handle well I do actually think now I handle it
like I am handling situations far better as I grow up.
But like, give yourself a break if you handle something badly,
because like sometimes you're just angry, and I totally get it.
I've been part of this friendship group since grade six
and all throughout high school, so we've all been best
friends for about eight years. I'm closest with one girl
(21:20):
named Beth. It's a fake name for context. I work
in the busiest pub in our town. There's something inside
me that would love to work at a busy pub
because it's like men help men everywhere.
Speaker 3 (21:31):
I went to a pub on Sunday and it was
just really like jolly hot. Wait. I was a Bridge
Hotel Richmond. I was like, you have the fucking best life.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
And it's like if you're single, like boys are gonna
hit on you left and right.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
Yeah, even if you're not single. Probably.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
I work in the busiest pub in our town, so
everyone is there on the weekends. One night, I'm working
and see this guy who I think is so hot,
let's call him Jack. Jack is with best's boyfriend at
the time. So I'm talking to Jack and Beth's boyfriend
pretty much all night, and I end up getting Jack's number.
We go home together once I finished work eight.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
Late.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
I'm driving Jack and I home. He's super drunk and
has clearly had a lot of beers. I'm already feeling
iffy about taking him home because he's so far from
a souper state. I've made up my mind on the
drive home that nothing would happen between us tonight besides
the cuddle. That's fine because then it's like you don't
really get anxiety and you get to kind of know them,
and you haven't gone like fuck, yeah, what did I do?
Let's see how we go. Once we arrive at my house,
(22:27):
Jack goes fully nonverbal. I'm assuming because of the state
he's in. I wish I could go non verbal. I
have a shower and get ready for bed, while he's
literally just standing there snapchatting people in my room.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
You know how I feel about snapshat.
Speaker 1 (22:41):
I eventually get into bed and trying to make conversation
with him, but it's pretty one sided.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
I'd be like, get.
Speaker 3 (22:47):
Out, why are you here?
Speaker 2 (22:48):
Like why are you actually here?
Speaker 1 (22:49):
Then?
Speaker 2 (22:49):
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (22:50):
You would have probably rather just left it as like
a fun night chatting at the bar and then been
like cool, like take me out for a drink.
Speaker 3 (22:55):
Now, yeah, no, this figure in my room I have to.
Speaker 1 (22:57):
Look Yeah like sleep rolls demen. I'd roll over and
just start scrolling on TikTok. I'll speak you the details
of how we got here, but I but I start
giving him the gluck, like nine thousand girl, I wish
I had the details on how you got from where
you were to their so casually like, I need to
know how you got from one to the other, so
(23:18):
please do a follow up just for me.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
I won't read it. And notice he's on his phone.
Speaker 1 (23:24):
I tell him to get off his phone orro'll stop
fair he gets off his phone, you fucking hope, so
you should be goddamn grateful and all is well until
about two minutes later I noticed he's on his phone again,
trying to secretly film me.
Speaker 2 (23:37):
What would I do in that situation? I would slap
the phone out of his hand and be like, you
get the fuck out of my No.
Speaker 1 (23:41):
I would grab it, delete from the deleted album, and
be like, fuck out of my house right fucking now.
Speaker 3 (23:47):
I would literally just snap the phone across.
Speaker 2 (23:49):
Would I think I throw it and break it.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Yeah, and you're not getting this phone now, you don't
deserve it.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
I instantly snatched the phone, delete all the evidence could,
yell at him and kick him the fuck out of
my house.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
Good.
Speaker 1 (24:02):
I was so shaken up after this, so of course
I confided in my friends, especially Beth, since she's been
through something similar. A few months go by and Beth
tells me that one night she got really drunk, Jack
messaged her and they hooked up. She'd broken up with
her boyfriend at this point. Okay, I was about to say, Beth, girl,
she was really sorry and sent me what I thought
was a truly heartfelt message expressing her regrets.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
Yeah, because that is true.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
It's a guy that like, yeah, maybe if you just
gave him the GLO got nine thousand and that want
to be that big a deal. But it's like he
violated you and tried to film you. So it's like
he's done something really terrible to you. You would hope
your friends would like be like, steer clear of that
fucking guy.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
Yeah, you know, and like this case where you're able
to notice someone's filming, it's rare, like people actually get
away with it and could have been so much.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
Well, yeah, so it's like you should steer clear of
someone who would do that to a friend, you know,
and why would you want to sleep with a guy
like that. I took some space and then I forgave her.
A couple weeks after that, I'm at at an event
and Jack is there. I wouldn't even know how to
fucking react and sit.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
You or something like that.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
He comes up to me trying to tell me that
he never took a video of me, even though I
literally saw the video, and that he and Beth just
want me to get over it so they can start dating.
So this whole time, Beth and all the other girls
in the friendship group knew they were hooking up and
in a situation ship behind my back.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
I feel so betrayed and embarrassed.
Speaker 1 (25:15):
I sent Beth a message saying our friendship was over
and haven't spoken to her or any of the girls since.
I've seen them a few times around town. They've given
me dirty looks like I am the one in the wrong.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Oh. Girls are so mean.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
Sometimes I couldn't be more grateful for the other friends
I have, But sometimes I wonder.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
Am I in the wrong. I love your opinion on
this girl.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
No, there's sometimes just one of those girls that can
kind of like control the way that the group works,
and everyone would rather be a bit mean to stay
on their good side than be the one pushed out
in the outs. And I feel like in a situation
like this, that's more what that's looking like is why
everyone else is like jumping on the hate train. But
you're almost lucky you got out of friendships like that
(25:54):
when you did, because who wants friendships like that when
you're older.
Speaker 4 (25:57):
No, it's like your friend's duty to protect you and
ride adorned for you.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
And I think you got lucky. You're definitely not like
you didn't get lucky. Like it will fucking suck, and
it did suck, And like I've gone through a period
where I lost like my whole fridship group, and I
was lucky that I had a few other girls and
they ended up. They saw my friends today and they're incredible.
And I look back and think how fucking grateful I
am that it ended the way that it did and
that I was able to kind of get out of that.
(26:22):
So I just think keep looking forward people like that
karma is going to be a bitch to them anyway,
so you just have to wait for that. But you're
definitely not in the wrong goal, And I'm sorry and
fuck Beth.
Speaker 4 (26:32):
Yeah literally, the only like they would see you doing
wrong in the sense that you're inconveniencing what Beth was.
So she's like trying to villainize you to her friends
and everyone around her.
Speaker 2 (26:43):
Why doesn't she just get over it? Excuse me?
Speaker 1 (26:45):
Like, if that happened to any of you, I feel
like you, I fear you would feel slightly differently.
Speaker 4 (26:50):
Yeah, and I'd love to know how Beth would react
if this lovely listener hung out with her ex boyfriend.
Speaker 2 (26:55):
Yeah, hey, was best Bes's boyfriend and nice guy?
Speaker 3 (26:58):
Was he hard?
Speaker 2 (26:59):
Was he hard?
Speaker 1 (27:00):
So maybe when he's at your pub next you should
float with him a little bit and see shows?
Speaker 2 (27:07):
Okay? Hi?
Speaker 1 (27:08):
Is he obsessed with you and the party? It's about
three months ago. I went into state for a wedding
my friend from home, let's call her Sophie. He decided
to meet me there after the wedding for a girl's weekend.
Keep in mind, Sophie is single and living her best
single life. But I'm in a very loving and healthy relationship.
We went out and she kissed a guy a few
years older than her, which I was totally fine with,
despite having to make awkward conversation for a couple hours
(27:30):
with his friend. I hate that shit, but I like
you're a good friend for doing it. Those two guys
then left and she met another guy, let's call him Brad.
Brad was off his face and they exchanged socials. The
next night, we planned to go to dinner and then
she was going to meet Brad for a couple of
drinks at the barn next to the restaurant. While she
did that, I went to visit my family friends at
their hotel. I thought I'd only be gone for two
(27:52):
or three hours. Two hours go by, and having her
from Sophie, I check her snapmaps and they're magically turned off. Like, girl,
I don't care, I'm not your mum, but I didn't
know where you are because I didn't know that you're safe.
Speaker 3 (28:02):
And I need a fucking answer for you.
Speaker 1 (28:04):
I know you hate snap fan, but a girl's not
out of her snaphase yet.
Speaker 3 (28:09):
It's okay.
Speaker 1 (28:09):
S Snapmaps used to be the fucking main of my existence.
Like that shit caused me so much fucking angst and tears,
and because my ex boyfriend, like when I was younger,
would have it on and he'd always I'd be like,
where the fuck are you? You know, and they leave
it on purpose and then turn it off on purpose,
and it's like such a mind game.
Speaker 3 (28:26):
And I've caught a guy out for a while.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
Yeah, Snapmaps was demonic and very toxic. Quite frankly, we
were in a state we weren't familiar with, and she
hadn't responded to my messages. An hour goes by and
I start stressing that she's being kidnapped or something fucked
has happened. Ten minutes later, so if he messages me
saying she and Brad out at the front of my
family's friend's hotel to pick me up, then Brad's taking
us back to our hotel. Okay, the most awkward five
(28:50):
minute car right in my life. We get back, and
so if you proceeds to tell me that she left
the bar with Brad, who she's known all of five minutes,
to go back to his house thirty minutes away and
sleep with him. First ladies, at the time, I just
laughed it off and went to bed. But since we
got home it's just not sitting right with me. I'd
never leave my friend on a trip to go home
with some random guy and not tell her where I was.
(29:10):
Since I've been home, Sophie and I have been distant.
I've taken a step back, hoping that she'd asked what's
going on because I hate confrontation. But she hasn't. She's
just acting normal. Am I being dramatic? Do I bring
it up even though it's been a couple months, or
do I just forget about it? Firstly, I don't think
you're being dramatic, And I think the reason that Sophie
maybe isn't bringing it up is there because there's probably
a slight embarrassment.
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Around it, do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (29:32):
Yeah, an uncomfortable nurse of Like, yeah, what she did
was probably a bit fucked, and it is a bit
fucked really like you were with your family friends. I
get that, But it's also like you do have sometimes
I have those friends where you just look at them
and go, girl, where does it end?
Speaker 2 (29:47):
Do you know what I mean? Like you're putting yourself
into ageous.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Situations again and again and again, and like everyone has one,
and I think my friends have grown out of that,
But there was definitely periods where I'd be like, do
you want to be kidnapped? Because that's how you fucking act,
And it's like you kind of there's really not much
you can do unless you kind of sit down and
explain it to them, and they will end up continuing
what they want to do.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
But I would bring it up.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
I don't think she's going to because yeah, maybe there
is a bit of embarrassment that she's like, oh, maybe
she's acting weird with me because I did that and
that was a bit weird and it was a bit
unsafe and like fuck, like so I'll just brush it
under the rug. So I would just mention it and
say you obviously worried about her, Like there comes a
point where you know you just want her to be
safe and you felt like her, you'd never ditch her,
you don't want her to.
Speaker 3 (30:29):
Do it again.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
I'd talk like, if you value it friendship and you
want to be friends with her, like, absolutely, mention it
to her.
Speaker 4 (30:35):
Yeah, I have a friend who is very similar to
what you were.
Speaker 3 (30:38):
Saying, is he and they're one of my.
Speaker 2 (30:39):
Favorite humans And you're like, girl, you want to die?
Speaker 4 (30:42):
Yeah, And I don't even get angry, and they're like,
I'm judging what you're doing way I don't want you
to well, i'd kind of done.
Speaker 2 (30:48):
Sometimes I do judge you.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
I'm like, you want You're putting yourself in these unsafe
situations again and again and again, and it's like you,
I want the best for you, and like I'm getting worried.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
Yeah, there's some people that have people like I.
Speaker 4 (30:59):
Don't know if it's a control thing, but I'm now
like I actually can't drive myself insane worrying about you.
Speaker 3 (31:04):
I don't know if that sounds bad.
Speaker 1 (31:06):
No, there's a lot of Like I think that's quite
common that you hit a point where you're like I
can't help this anymore. You're not listening to me, Like,
just know that I'm here if you need me to be,
you know.
Speaker 4 (31:17):
I think with this friend, it's like others around us,
and people will be so direct with her like she
is aware.
Speaker 3 (31:23):
That's a bit of a thing.
Speaker 4 (31:24):
I think every time I get concerned for her, I
just try and lead first with like I'm concerned for
your safety.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
I just really lead.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
It with safety, like not like embarrassment and like, girl,
don't go home with a guy you've met, Like, just
be like, don't turn your snap maps off. Like I
was really worried about you. I wish I knew where
you were, Like I would have liked to be in
the loop. You know, I'd never judge you.
Speaker 2 (31:45):
Yeah kind of thing.
Speaker 4 (31:46):
And it's even like, if you didn't like Brad, let's say,
it's almost not even worth bringing that up.
Speaker 3 (31:50):
I think bringing him into it.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
It's just like this is it could be any fucking guy.
Speaker 1 (31:55):
It's like, you just want to know that your friend's safe,
and I think you more lead with that and just
tell her that that's why you've been feeling because you
didn't really like how that situation made you feel.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
Good luck, girl, and good luck.
Speaker 3 (32:06):
He's done the follow up. We love follow up.
Speaker 2 (32:08):
Yeah, we do, all right.
Speaker 1 (32:09):
I met a boy when I was in Bali last
and I met you too cute, so sweet Anyway, I
genuinely thought it was just a holiday romance, but I
was telling all my family and friends he was the
love of my life. We hung out almost every night
in Bali until I flew back home. I'm from wa
and he's from Sydney. I've never had.
Speaker 2 (32:28):
Like a holiday fucking romance. I'm my dream.
Speaker 3 (32:31):
They seem a bit normal.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
Everyone has them. I'm like, it would be so much fun.
I've never had one.
Speaker 1 (32:38):
It's because I'm like. He got really unwell after I
got home.
Speaker 2 (32:42):
He's still in Bali.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
So I told him to fly to Perth because it's
quicker and I'd take care of him, not thinking he
actually would.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
He did. Oh my god, that's slay. He booked a.
Speaker 1 (32:52):
Flight, came to Perth, stayed at my family home for
about five days, came out to a friend's birthday and
we had a great time. Despite him still not being
one hundred perm that sounds really cute. Fast forward a
few weeks, he's begging me to go to Sydney. He
booked me a flight and off I went. I met
his family, his friends, and again we had a great time.
It's now been about a month of messaging and is
starting to die down whatever it was that we had.
(33:15):
I don't know if it's just because we haven't seen
each other, or if it's because it's fading. I also
don't know how long distance could even work. Hit me
with your advice, because I really did think he was
the one. I think long distance can work, especially state
to stay. But I think starting long distance, like starting
at long distance would be a.
Speaker 3 (33:33):
Chance you need to go trust before you Yeah, I
have taking that.
Speaker 1 (33:37):
I think you need to just give it some time.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
See if the mess.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
I think if the mess just continue to die down,
you kind of just have to let it die down. Yeah,
but I don't think do that whole like you know,
petty or he hasn't been fled in four hours to
well wait five, like text him and see if you
can kind of keep it going and maybe he's busy,
maybe he's doing things. But like if it dies down,
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but
I think you kind of just have to let it.
(34:05):
You live in different states, and it's not like you
can be like, let's go grab a coffee.
Speaker 4 (34:08):
Well this is like easy for me to say, but
like this is where distance is preferable because like you're
not going to walk into him in the street if
maybe he does say, you know, I'm not feeling the
same way anymore.
Speaker 3 (34:20):
Yeah, I feel like you can actually be so much
more direct suber message.
Speaker 1 (34:24):
Yeah, it's like because there's no worry that you're going
to run into But it's like, honestly, wo were easy.
But if it's meant to be all end up finding
its way back together. You never know, but I think yeah,
for now, it's like, don't be like hey, hey, hey Wayne,
you responding to my messages, but like see if you
can keep the convo going and if he starts putting
the effort in back, and if.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
He doesn't, you kind of just have to yeah, let it.
Speaker 4 (34:45):
It hasn't been that much time either, and no, nothing's
ever going to like things do have to level out.
You've had this like crazy stuff, yeah, oh my god,
like you've met something.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
Like I'm in love with this man.
Speaker 3 (34:55):
Yeah, and yeah, already traveling, which sucks.
Speaker 1 (34:58):
Don't get me wrong that it would be a rutal
feeling to think that it went from all of that
to possibly nothing, but it also sadly is the case
that that happens.
Speaker 4 (35:06):
Yeah, but I was going for bloody dates once a
week with my boyfriend and the lead.
Speaker 3 (35:10):
Up to us dating.
Speaker 4 (35:11):
Yeah, you're bloody traveling per Sydney, balih all around the globe.
Speaker 3 (35:16):
Like that's a hectic start. Yeah, I feel like it's
always going to seat.
Speaker 1 (35:20):
It's going to feel like a lull now that that's done,
because you've only ever known each other kind of being
in the same place. So maybe this is what if
you were to be long, This is what that would look.
Speaker 2 (35:30):
Like for you. Do you know what I mean? Yeah,
but you can't.
Speaker 1 (35:33):
Just have to see how it goes over the next
couple days and weeks, and if it continues to drop
off and drop off and he's not making any effort,
then don't make any happorad either, girl.
Speaker 3 (35:43):
And get that ass back to Balin, get that Bali.
Speaker 2 (35:45):
And finds O a new one.
Speaker 1 (35:46):
All right, guys, I love you so so much and
chat to you next week. We will have my stinky
stinky sister on Okay, Bye,
I was thinking if I told you the real things
that I'm feeling and like, things that I'm angry about,
and you would judge me. Hello, guys, I have sadly
some disappointing news for you.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
Jackie Alexander is not in the room with us right now.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
She is back in Perth recovering from her hands. We
obviously wanted to have her on, but we will have
her on in the near near future, in the next
couple of weeks, so do not fret. But that means
I will have to give you the bachelorette recap all
on my lonesome. And boy, was at a fucking weekend,
all right, We're not here to be demure. I had
a far, far too large night the night before I
(00:41):
left for her bachelorette, so I didn't get to leave
to go to the bachelorette as early as I would
have liked. It was stupid, silly, one of those nights
where you really don't think it's going to be as
big as it is. But I was having a lot
of fun. I was with my friends whatever. I don't
know what I was hoping. I'm not someone that can
back it up. If you know me, I'm like one
day drinker. And then I'm like, don't fucking talk to me,
(01:02):
put my phone on D and D and like, bright hand,
I don't exist. But that was obviously not an option.
So yeah, I didn't get to leave as early as
I wanted to. Luckily, Ava wasn't too far ahead of me.
We were both driping up separately, and what would have
been a one and a half hour drive there was
so many roadworks it was bumping a bumper ntil like
I reckon the last forty minutes. And I've recently discovered
I can't really drink caffeine because it makes me really sleepy,
(01:25):
and I think that's a symptom of pretty sure I
have ADHD, but I need to get that diagnosed, which
is something anyway I will get there. But if you
have undiagnosed ADHD, or if you have ADHD, caffeine can
make you really sleepy. And I've realized recently that like,
I'm worse off when I drink coffee than.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
When I don't.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
Anyway, So I raw dogged that fucking three hour flight.
At that three hour fucking drive, no caffeine, no nothing.
I got a cheeseburger and it made me want to
fucking throw up. And I get there, everyone's ready. Everyone
looked beautiful, The fucking venue is beautiful, and everyone was great.
It was one of those ones where it's like you
don't really know everyone, but then like the moment you
(02:02):
all like have a drink and sit down and have
a chat, like you all get along so well and
it was so much fun. We played that first night
was Cowboys and Caviar, which was really cute. So that
two little fucking cavia cans. How much would you think
one of those cans would cost?
Speaker 2 (02:16):
Blake? Did you see it?
Speaker 3 (02:18):
Like I did. I'm so bad at this because I
actually don't like caviar.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
I do like it. I'm abougie bitch.
Speaker 4 (02:25):
I don't want to embarrass myself. But let's say like
eight hundred dollars.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Oh see, you know what, I fucking hate. You didn't
do this on purpose, but you know when you try
and like say to someone, I guess how much is
stress cost that I just bought? Like it was fucking
crazy and they go like five grand and you're like, no,
it was like eight hundred bucks. But like now it
seems like it wasn't that much because you've just like
over guessed.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
It, so it's going to be like two.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
It was three hundred dollars, okay.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
For two cans, and we ate one of the cans
and then the other one was still sitting there. We
were going to get to it. It was sitting on ice.
The ice melted and the can submerged in the water.
Speaker 2 (03:00):
And got filled with water.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Therefore we couldn't eat it anymore. So that was like
three hundred bucks down the fucking drain because it was fulled. Anyway,
that night was like chill, actually lie not chill, but
we had the big day tomorrow, so we all kind
of went upstairs.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
There was a TV.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
Jackie's sister, Evie had organize all these games, which was
so cute, like she got Jackie to answer these questions,
which she'd also got Jackie's fiance to answer the same
and like see if they got the answers right, or
we all had to send in a funny photo of
Jackie and it was like who sent that? And like
where's that photo from?
Speaker 2 (03:32):
So that night was just fun. Everyone was in a
really good mood.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Jackie was wasted, but in the best fucking way, like
having a blast and it makes you so happy. Like
seeing someone enjoying themselves, like on a day that's like
really meant for them. So then the next day I
was running on fumes. But we move and we keep going,
and that was the beautiful, big long lunch slim Arran's
day I did. Unfortunately, sadly, I did notice that my
(03:58):
name was like, you know, your names, like a suggested
sort of search on like videos. Jackie like would have
a video of like everyone sitting there in the breakfast
like outfits steing, and my name was the search bar.
And I'm like, it's probably because everyone's like, where the
fuck is easy and why is she not in that?
Speaker 2 (04:13):
I was just sleep.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
I needed the sleep, you know, I really did. And
I got up, like actually got up like twelve, and
then we all got ready for the long lunch. The
caterers of the food was fucking insane.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
We had.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
I only say this because like I care about menus,
and I'm not sure if other people care about menus,
but I'll tell you what. We ate mozzarella and tomato
roon greini, which I think easily the best roon genie
I ever had, Like this whipped tocotto eggplant sort of
crostinything and then steak with Jimmy Tueri Volkarrigatoni Pesto passed up.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
Fuck, I'm so hungry.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
This is like your version of parents, I know, I know.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
And then salad, which you know we put on the plate,
but do we actually eat anyway. It was incredible. There
was a drag queen that came. She had so much fun.
Everything like it was very smooth with sailing, like there
wasn't the drama that I feel like usually comes with
like a big group of girls being away on something.
But I think when you're all there for like a
common fucking cause of like make sure this girl has
a good time, there isn't gonna be any issues, you know.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
Yeah, and there wasn't any.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
But then the wake up at nine am was brutal
to clean the house and drive back fucking home.
Speaker 4 (05:18):
So we actually we have house parties at ours. We
have a rule now at the end of the night
when we were so drying clean yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
Yeah, no, no, people did do that. And look, I
sound like a fucking cow. I can't take credit for it.
Speaker 3 (05:31):
N I'm not a good cleaner.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
I will clean whatever you need me to do if
you tell me what to do. Yeah, if it's not
my house, I don't really know how to clean it.
And I know that's really fucking crazy, but like clinician, I.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
Don't know where anything goes. I don't know what you
want me to do with this.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
This there was a lot of stuff that was like
half of them were the houses things, and half of
them were stuff that girls were taking back home with them,
like glasses and things. And there's like sixteen people there
and I'm like, you, guys, I'm gonna be honest with you.
You wouldn't You don't want me there, No, you will
get it done easier if I'm not in that room
with you.
Speaker 4 (06:03):
It's literally like I won't be any help. And also
I feel like in a group setting there are like
very assumed leaders, and there.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Are leaders and they take that role and like I'm
there for the var like you, you don't bring me.
Speaker 4 (06:15):
Along to clean and I like to have fun when cleaning.
Let's talk.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
Yeah, And I was on my deathbed.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
I'd had less sleep than I think I've ever had
since I've been to a festival. Like that was like
giving festival for me because of that stupid fucking Thursday night,
which was all my faults so like there was no
complaining to be had. I did it to myself. Let's
fucking pick up. Yeah, but it was. It was so
much fun and it was beautiful and yeah, everything went
really well. But that drive home was hell on a stick,
(06:43):
to be quite. Frank got home, lay horizontally Watchhouse of
the Dragon with Riley and Tessa, and had Bolona's for dinner.
Speaker 3 (06:51):
Sunday. Sunday.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
That was Sunday.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
Okay, how are you recovering now?
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Monday? Oh, Monday, I didn't have.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
I usually I have my PTE at ten thirty, so
that would that would have been canceled. I'm gonna be
completely honest with you, but I didn't. My first thing
I had on Monday was actually my psychologists appointment at
one amazing. So psychologist and patient confidentiality doesn't really count
for me, do you know what I mean? Like I
can tell you guys, like what she was annoying me. Okay,
(07:21):
So so I went to my first psychologist a moment
probably in like four years last week, and it was
a new tick. And psychologists are like dating, you really
need to find that chemistry with someone like it might
even take like a couple people to meet before you go, yeah, okay,
this is someone.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
That I feel like I can actually talk to.
Speaker 1 (07:40):
The first the Chickasaw last week made me feel like
I was the craziest person alive. Like, so I walk in,
I'm late always, I'm probably like three minutes late, like
nothing heck, but I did text ahead of time and
say I'm running. Five minutes later, I walk in. There's
no one at like the front desk or anything.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
So i'm a little bit.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
It's really dark, like sort of moody. That made it
like moody calming.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
It was cool. And then my dad calls me. I
don't like, fuck really right.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
Now, but I answered because it was coming from a
number that it didn't say dad, like it was a
random number, and.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
So I thought maybe it was her, and I was
gonna be.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Like, hey, like I'm right here, So I answer, it's
my dad.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
Send me the Apple code, Send me the Apple code.
I'm like, whoa, whoa. The whole room.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
This is like a quiet, quiet, quiet building. And he's
I'm like, why are you so fucking angry right now?
And my Dad's like, not some crazy angry person, he
was just he gets really frustrated because our Apple TVs
have been basically, if he ever needs to get a
code from Apple on his phone or computer, it randomly
comes to my phone and we do not know how
to fix it. And it's been like that for five years.
So he and he gets angry at me, like he
(08:42):
thinks I've done it on purpose, like I've linked him
to me.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
And parents, hay when things don't work, Yeah, and.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
We don't know how to fix it.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
And I'm like, I don't want this life either that,
you know what I mean, Like, you can have your
fucking Apple codes.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
So I go, Dad, I'm.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
About to walk into a psycholgist moment. At this moment,
the lady opens the door. She's staring at me. She's
downing there, she's not saying anything, and Dad still screaming
in the phone.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Set me the up, God, send me the app. I
gotta go down.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
I'm brought the walking door, frock. It's like, oh, just
want to stop. And this lady's just standing there and
listening to me. And then I walk through the door
because she kind of rushes me through silently, and I
Dad's like, I don't care, I go down.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
I'm literally in the room right now.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Can I please call you back after No, it's come
there on the phone right now. I checked the phone.
There's no code. I say, no code, hang up. Lady
doesn't say anything. I sit down.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
She goes, wow, really just seems like you've just landed here.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
I was like, oh, I kind of took it as like,
you know, when someone's a bit chaotic and it kind
of seems like like they kind.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
Of just whoof PLoP themselves down.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
So I kind of took it more as that, and
I was like, oh, yeah, Like I feel like my
life is a bit My life is a bit chaotic,
like my mind and the way it works. Everything's always
like go, go go, and it's a bit like whoa.
I'm like, oh yeah, I feel like that tends to
be like me, you know, I'm always just like that
your turn, Your turn, Lady respond, do you know what
I mean? Give me something?
Speaker 3 (09:58):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (09:59):
Hello?
Speaker 1 (09:59):
Nothing nothing, no response. I'm like okay, Hi, She goes hello.
I'm like, fuck, I've got an hour of shit. She
was like a movie psychologist where they like leave that
open space for you in the hopes that you respond,
and I'm like, no, I'm done.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (10:15):
Like I've said you're not firstly really asking me anything,
except now you've asked me about my relationship with my
dad because for some reason that you think there's a
problem man, and there isn't. I'm like, okay, I guess
I guess I'll go. So I start talking for like
a couple of minutes and then probably thirty seconds, and
then I'm like I stop because I'm like, your turn,
I'm your mind.
Speaker 3 (10:36):
You're meeting, this is your first time.
Speaker 1 (10:38):
Yeah, you know, like, ask me some questions, get us
talking into like the root of why I'm here or
what things I want to fix. No, I guess I'm
taking the lead on this one.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
Woman. I'm like, fine, son.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
She leaves the silence, and I'm like, you know what,
I'm going to leave the silence too, So I don't
say anything either, God, And we sit there for ten
seconds and then she goes starts talking, and I'm like,
you could have done that ten seconds earlier and we
wouldn't be feeling this awkward. And I said to it,
I actually said to her because at this one I
was really annoyed because like I knew we weren't connecting.
(11:10):
I was thinking, if I told you the real things
that I'm feeling and like things that I'm angry about
and stuff that I want to solve here you would
judge me. So I knew immediately, like this is not
the right fit for me because I've had some amazing
psychologists that really helped me, and like I felt like
we were having a conversation, whereas I feel like you're
trying to make me show how crazy I am.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (11:30):
Like you're like waiting for me to crack and have
some like yelling and screaming fit and then you've like
you've earlier like I've done it.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
I've fixed her, she's hit it. No, I'm fine. I
need you to respond to me.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
And how much older was she if you don't mind me.
Speaker 2 (11:44):
She was probably thirty five.
Speaker 4 (11:46):
Yeah, it's interesting. It was just like how she opens,
it's actually trying to pull you back down to that.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
Yeah, okay, I've.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
Had you're making me feel weird.
Speaker 1 (11:55):
Like so I actually said to her, I know that
you guys do that thing where you like leave the
silence so I'll feel it. But like I'm kind of
done with what I've said, so like, if you can
help me out here, do you know what I mean,
like I could just talk to my fucking I could
just do this right now and talk to myself for all,
like I'm paying you to tell me what I need
to do. Yeah, anyway, I swore, and I was like,
(12:18):
you know, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Some people don't like swearing, and that's fine.
Speaker 1 (12:21):
But I said, I'm sorry, excuse my swearing, Like I
swear a lot, a little, I swear a little bit.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
She doesn't say anything.
Speaker 1 (12:29):
I'm like, fuck, oh my god, okay, fine, And then
I told her about my two breakups, as in very
briefly how they ended, because I think if you hear
them back to back, you're like, shit, go like, you
haven't had luck in the relationship department, do you know
what I mean? And she goes completely straight face like
she hasn't responded or she been shocked or anything. She
(12:50):
didn't even laugh. She goes, usually I tend to school
my features, but that is really shocking. I'm like, you
did school your features. You haven't done anything with your
face since I last started speaking. And then ten minutes left,
six minutes left, two minutes left. Whoa, You're meant to
make me lose myself in this hour and just like
(13:12):
chat and chat and chat.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
You're giving me a fucking countdown.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
I think I would have like actually drove myself.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
No, I was angry, And I think it's because I've
had some really good psychologists and I'm like, you're not it.
Maybe for some people, that is the route that people need,
but I don't want that movie psychologist that goes and
how does that make you feel?
Speaker 3 (13:32):
I've like I have had that.
Speaker 4 (13:34):
I feel like they all sadly fall into that because
they've been trained to do exactly that. Yeah, at least
get to know me and like I have gotten in
the very comfortable space with my therapist before they've leant
into that.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
Yeah, And I'm like, right now, I just feel like
you are trying.
Speaker 2 (13:51):
She was trying to be some really.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
Amazing psychologist that's like finding the solution, Like how does
that make you feel? And then yeah, everything will just
tell out of me and then I'm like, oh, I'm fixed. No,
I need you to actually like I need someone that's
going to like laugh with me of like something's fucked,
or like if I say, yeah, that girl's a huge bitch,
I want you to be like, yeah she is.
Speaker 4 (14:11):
Yeah, but you know what I mean I feel like
my last therapist as well, he would kind of like
structure our sessions.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
It's like this session I want to learn about high school.
I feel like I haven't heard enough about that.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
Yeah, even like pro and like asks you questions about it.
Whereas she left everything so open ended that I'm like,
this is the first time I've gone to therapy where
I don't have a specific solution I need fixed. I'm
going there because I feel like it's healthy and I
have a lot of things that run through my mind,
and I'm like, you know, it would be nice to
talk to a professional that can maybe like help me
clarify a lot of these thoughts.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
So when you just leave.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
It open ended like that and don't ask me anything,
I'm like, well, this really annoys me. But then I
have this as well, and then this person I really hate,
and then do you know what I mean, I'm like,
I don't know where to go from here. And then
when she counted me down and fucking tick see her,
she goes, all right, well, I think we book in
this appointment for next week. I'm like, yeah, you wish, buddy,
So I said, okay. I was trying to find an
(15:06):
email because she scares me, and I was like, I
need to cancel disappointment because it's.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
Not going to fucking happen.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
And I mum, then, because she's the one, like I
said last time, and it's like, you need to fucking
see someone. So I was like, okay, that she didn't work,
can you find me another one. She then finds me
another one and lo and behold. I was like, I've
recognized this name and it was the lady that helped
me through my breakup with my ex boyfriend and I
really liked her, so I was like, great, I will
just go back and see her. She was amazing. She
was a little bit older, probably like fifty something. She would,
(15:36):
you know, laugh with you and kind of make you
feel like what you were feeling wasn't crazy, and like
help you through things. So I was like, great, that
lady is amazing. I want to see her again. So
that was my excuse. I couldn't find an email, so
I was like, fuck, I'll have to call them. What
if she picks up? So I call and it's after
and like, according to Google, the place's closed. So I'm
(15:56):
like great, I'll leave a voicemail. Nope, they answer. I'm like, okay,
was it the same chick? It wasn't to be fair
In fairness, I don't know her name, so it could
have well.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
Been, but I don't think it was.
Speaker 1 (16:06):
And then I said, hey, like I want like thank
her please for a time.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
She was great.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
I just found out my old psychologists available, and I
think that that's a better fit for me. Can I
cancel that appointment? Like blah blah, thank you so much,
no worries. But I'm going to be passing this information
on and she might want to give you a call.
Speaker 3 (16:26):
No one does that.
Speaker 1 (16:27):
No. The whole problem is that me and so and
so let's call it Sarah can't commerse very well. So
I'd really prefer it if she didn't give me a call.
Speaker 3 (16:37):
Is she a text? Because I think she can text me.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
I won't reply.
Speaker 3 (16:40):
We have more chemistry, though we probably.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
Would at least she doesn't leave all those awkward silences
fuck me anyway. So that was I just want to
say it might not always work out the first time,
and that is okay. Yesterday I went to see my
old psychologist and it was weirdly so nostalgic because like
last I was there, I was in like a totally.
Speaker 2 (17:02):
Different place in my life.
Speaker 1 (17:03):
Like I was working at Lulu Lemon like once a
fucking week, fucking crying about God. We know, we all
know who. And she was like, oh, like I we're chatting,
and she's like, you tell me you don't still talk
to him.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
I'm like no, god no.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
But she was great and immediately like she just focused
on like one thing, and that was like my compulsion
and like all my fucking alarms and like my checking things.
Speaker 3 (17:26):
She's already like looking whereas this was just like.
Speaker 1 (17:29):
She remembered things about me, but she focused on like
one thing and was like, today we're just going to
focus on like breaths and taking like mindful breaths when
you feel overwhelmed and go that can wait till later.
I need to focus on the present I'm in right now.
And I'm like great, she's great. So that is a
journey that we'll be going through. But I'm like, I
don't enjoy psychology. But I'm like, like I don't enjoy
(17:50):
going to see a psychologist, you know, like no one does.
Speaker 3 (17:53):
I actually weirdly do freak, but I haven't been in the age.
Speaker 1 (17:57):
No, But it's like, yeah, it's not going to be
something that everyone loved to do. But I'm like, it's
gonna be helpful, and I do feel why not, Like
I feel like when as you get older, so many
moving parts in like life, and I'm like, I definitely
don't have a fucking hold on my life or things,
and my brain is always in overdrive and there's so
many different things going on that distressing me out at
all times. And I'm like, there's no harm. So I
(18:18):
think if you're thinking about it, you may as well
give it a go. And if you have a bad
experience like mine, at least it's a funny story.
Speaker 4 (18:22):
So yeah, And I think everyone's been through a therapist's breakup.
I had one. She was such a nice woman.
Speaker 3 (18:28):
I felt really bad like letting her go. But she
had this thing of like, whenever you're getting anxious thoughts,
speaking an Elmo voice at all?
Speaker 2 (18:37):
Oh no, what's an Elmo voice?
Speaker 3 (18:40):
Like you have to pretend you're anxious thoughts at Elmo
in your head And then I just like that instantly
gave me.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
The ear and I'm like, I don't like that, and
she revisiting them.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
Everything seemed a little bit childish, but.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
Like you're like do you know that I'm not twelve?
Speaker 4 (18:54):
Yeah, no, even like skewed younger. I was just like,
this seems like I mean hindergarten.
Speaker 1 (19:00):
Yeah, and it's like I don't feel like you're going
to really help me get the crux of my adult issues.
Speaker 2 (19:06):
Voice.
Speaker 3 (19:06):
I moved on to a super hot guy and he was.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
I couldn't see if I had a super hot guy,
I'd be like, I'm perfect.
Speaker 2 (19:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (19:14):
No, I was like I played into I don't think
I was being authentic.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
Yeah, it's like, oh, you'll know why I'm here. I
don't know. I'm pretty perfect. Everything's really good, Thank you.
Speaker 3 (19:25):
How are you?
Speaker 4 (19:25):
He would like explain things to me, and like at
points back Blake and I'd just like la la la
name back there wasn't getting very productive and it's like
double rand paying therapy.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
Therapy is fucking expensive, so pricey.
Speaker 3 (19:41):
Yeah, like I do want to go back.
Speaker 1 (19:43):
You should get a mental mental getting a mental health plan.
Like it's like a ten pack where I feel like
they're way cheap because you get them back on Medicare
or something.
Speaker 4 (19:49):
So I don't want to spread misinformation here, but i'd
actually like to hear if anyone has a similar experience.
I have every time been on the ten step mental
health care plan. Either I can't act us my Mandy care,
which is a huge possibility, or it just doesn't change
any thing. It has not changed my fees and I've
never got money back. Right, Well, I love it that car.
Speaker 1 (20:11):
Yeah, you feel like you're you leave that room and
you're a better person, even though you've like, even if
you don't take any of the steps on board, you're like,
I am working towards a better meat. Tap that car.
Speaker 3 (20:21):
Yeah. Yeah, in that session, you've talked about how you
feel like a piece of shit, but you've walked a
piece of shit.
Speaker 1 (20:26):
But I'm aware, I'm a self aware piece of shit,
and you come out of the house. So yeah, that
was my Monday. And I did some other things but
nothing important. But that is enough about me. Now we
are getting into your problems and doing it helped me out.
Part two. All right, Number one? How is it love
(20:48):
the body? This happened a few months ago now, but
I'm really interested in your opinion and how you would
have handled the situation. I want to preface guys, the
situations I went through when I was younger.
Speaker 2 (20:58):
I did not.
Speaker 1 (20:59):
Handle well I do actually think now I handle it
like I am handling situations far better as I grow up.
But like, give yourself a break if you handle something badly,
because like sometimes you're just angry, and I totally get it.
I've been part of this friendship group since grade six
and all throughout high school, so we've all been best
friends for about eight years. I'm closest with one girl
(21:20):
named Beth. It's a fake name for context. I work
in the busiest pub in our town. There's something inside
me that would love to work at a busy pub
because it's like men help men everywhere.
Speaker 3 (21:31):
I went to a pub on Sunday and it was
just really like jolly hot. Wait. I was a Bridge
Hotel Richmond. I was like, you have the fucking best life.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
And it's like if you're single, like boys are gonna
hit on you left and right.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
Yeah, even if you're not single. Probably.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
I work in the busiest pub in our town, so
everyone is there on the weekends. One night, I'm working
and see this guy who I think is so hot,
let's call him Jack. Jack is with best's boyfriend at
the time. So I'm talking to Jack and Beth's boyfriend
pretty much all night, and I end up getting Jack's number.
We go home together once I finished work eight.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
Late.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
I'm driving Jack and I home. He's super drunk and
has clearly had a lot of beers. I'm already feeling
iffy about taking him home because he's so far from
a souper state. I've made up my mind on the
drive home that nothing would happen between us tonight besides
the cuddle. That's fine because then it's like you don't
really get anxiety and you get to kind of know them,
and you haven't gone like fuck, yeah, what did I do?
Let's see how we go. Once we arrive at my house,
(22:27):
Jack goes fully nonverbal. I'm assuming because of the state
he's in. I wish I could go non verbal. I
have a shower and get ready for bed, while he's
literally just standing there snapchatting people in my room.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
You know how I feel about snapshat.
Speaker 1 (22:41):
I eventually get into bed and trying to make conversation
with him, but it's pretty one sided.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
I'd be like, get.
Speaker 3 (22:47):
Out, why are you here?
Speaker 2 (22:48):
Like why are you actually here?
Speaker 1 (22:49):
Then?
Speaker 2 (22:49):
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (22:50):
You would have probably rather just left it as like
a fun night chatting at the bar and then been
like cool, like take me out for a drink.
Speaker 3 (22:55):
Now, yeah, no, this figure in my room I have to.
Speaker 1 (22:57):
Look Yeah like sleep rolls demen. I'd roll over and
just start scrolling on TikTok. I'll speak you the details
of how we got here, but I but I start
giving him the gluck, like nine thousand girl, I wish
I had the details on how you got from where
you were to their so casually like, I need to
know how you got from one to the other, so
(23:18):
please do a follow up just for me.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
I won't read it. And notice he's on his phone.
Speaker 1 (23:24):
I tell him to get off his phone orro'll stop
fair he gets off his phone, you fucking hope, so
you should be goddamn grateful and all is well until
about two minutes later I noticed he's on his phone again,
trying to secretly film me.
Speaker 2 (23:37):
What would I do in that situation? I would slap
the phone out of his hand and be like, you
get the fuck out of my No.
Speaker 1 (23:41):
I would grab it, delete from the deleted album, and
be like, fuck out of my house right fucking now.
Speaker 3 (23:47):
I would literally just snap the phone across.
Speaker 2 (23:49):
Would I think I throw it and break it.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Yeah, and you're not getting this phone now, you don't
deserve it.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
I instantly snatched the phone, delete all the evidence could,
yell at him and kick him the fuck out of
my house.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
Good.
Speaker 1 (24:02):
I was so shaken up after this, so of course
I confided in my friends, especially Beth, since she's been
through something similar. A few months go by and Beth
tells me that one night she got really drunk, Jack
messaged her and they hooked up. She'd broken up with
her boyfriend at this point. Okay, I was about to say, Beth, girl,
she was really sorry and sent me what I thought
was a truly heartfelt message expressing her regrets.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
Yeah, because that is true.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
It's a guy that like, yeah, maybe if you just
gave him the GLO got nine thousand and that want
to be that big a deal. But it's like he
violated you and tried to film you. So it's like
he's done something really terrible to you. You would hope
your friends would like be like, steer clear of that
fucking guy.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
Yeah, you know, and like this case where you're able
to notice someone's filming, it's rare, like people actually get
away with it and could have been so much.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
Well, yeah, so it's like you should steer clear of
someone who would do that to a friend, you know,
and why would you want to sleep with a guy
like that. I took some space and then I forgave her.
A couple weeks after that, I'm at at an event
and Jack is there. I wouldn't even know how to
fucking react and sit.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
You or something like that.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
He comes up to me trying to tell me that
he never took a video of me, even though I
literally saw the video, and that he and Beth just
want me to get over it so they can start dating.
So this whole time, Beth and all the other girls
in the friendship group knew they were hooking up and
in a situation ship behind my back.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
I feel so betrayed and embarrassed.
Speaker 1 (25:15):
I sent Beth a message saying our friendship was over
and haven't spoken to her or any of the girls since.
I've seen them a few times around town. They've given
me dirty looks like I am the one in the wrong.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Oh. Girls are so mean.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
Sometimes I couldn't be more grateful for the other friends
I have, But sometimes I wonder.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
Am I in the wrong. I love your opinion on
this girl.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
No, there's sometimes just one of those girls that can
kind of like control the way that the group works,
and everyone would rather be a bit mean to stay
on their good side than be the one pushed out
in the outs. And I feel like in a situation
like this, that's more what that's looking like is why
everyone else is like jumping on the hate train. But
you're almost lucky you got out of friendships like that
(25:54):
when you did, because who wants friendships like that when
you're older.
Speaker 4 (25:57):
No, it's like your friend's duty to protect you and
ride adorned for you.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
And I think you got lucky. You're definitely not like
you didn't get lucky. Like it will fucking suck, and
it did suck, And like I've gone through a period
where I lost like my whole fridship group, and I
was lucky that I had a few other girls and
they ended up. They saw my friends today and they're incredible.
And I look back and think how fucking grateful I
am that it ended the way that it did and
that I was able to kind of get out of that.
(26:22):
So I just think keep looking forward people like that
karma is going to be a bitch to them anyway,
so you just have to wait for that. But you're
definitely not in the wrong goal, And I'm sorry and
fuck Beth.
Speaker 4 (26:32):
Yeah literally, the only like they would see you doing
wrong in the sense that you're inconveniencing what Beth was.
So she's like trying to villainize you to her friends
and everyone around her.
Speaker 2 (26:43):
Why doesn't she just get over it? Excuse me?
Speaker 1 (26:45):
Like, if that happened to any of you, I feel
like you, I fear you would feel slightly differently.
Speaker 4 (26:50):
Yeah, and I'd love to know how Beth would react
if this lovely listener hung out with her ex boyfriend.
Speaker 2 (26:55):
Yeah, hey, was best Bes's boyfriend and nice guy?
Speaker 3 (26:58):
Was he hard?
Speaker 2 (26:59):
Was he hard?
Speaker 1 (27:00):
So maybe when he's at your pub next you should
float with him a little bit and see shows?
Speaker 2 (27:07):
Okay? Hi?
Speaker 1 (27:08):
Is he obsessed with you and the party? It's about
three months ago. I went into state for a wedding
my friend from home, let's call her Sophie. He decided
to meet me there after the wedding for a girl's weekend.
Keep in mind, Sophie is single and living her best
single life. But I'm in a very loving and healthy relationship.
We went out and she kissed a guy a few
years older than her, which I was totally fine with,
despite having to make awkward conversation for a couple hours
(27:30):
with his friend. I hate that shit, but I like
you're a good friend for doing it. Those two guys
then left and she met another guy, let's call him Brad.
Brad was off his face and they exchanged socials. The
next night, we planned to go to dinner and then
she was going to meet Brad for a couple of
drinks at the barn next to the restaurant. While she
did that, I went to visit my family friends at
their hotel. I thought I'd only be gone for two
(27:52):
or three hours. Two hours go by, and having her
from Sophie, I check her snapmaps and they're magically turned off. Like, girl,
I don't care, I'm not your mum, but I didn't
know where you are because I didn't know that you're safe.
Speaker 3 (28:02):
And I need a fucking answer for you.
Speaker 1 (28:04):
I know you hate snap fan, but a girl's not
out of her snaphase yet.
Speaker 3 (28:09):
It's okay.
Speaker 1 (28:09):
S Snapmaps used to be the fucking main of my existence.
Like that shit caused me so much fucking angst and tears,
and because my ex boyfriend, like when I was younger,
would have it on and he'd always I'd be like,
where the fuck are you? You know, and they leave
it on purpose and then turn it off on purpose,
and it's like such a mind game.
Speaker 3 (28:26):
And I've caught a guy out for a while.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
Yeah, Snapmaps was demonic and very toxic. Quite frankly, we
were in a state we weren't familiar with, and she
hadn't responded to my messages. An hour goes by and
I start stressing that she's being kidnapped or something fucked
has happened. Ten minutes later, so if he messages me
saying she and Brad out at the front of my
family's friend's hotel to pick me up, then Brad's taking
us back to our hotel. Okay, the most awkward five
(28:50):
minute car right in my life. We get back, and
so if you proceeds to tell me that she left
the bar with Brad, who she's known all of five minutes,
to go back to his house thirty minutes away and
sleep with him. First ladies, at the time, I just
laughed it off and went to bed. But since we
got home it's just not sitting right with me. I'd
never leave my friend on a trip to go home
with some random guy and not tell her where I was.
(29:10):
Since I've been home, Sophie and I have been distant.
I've taken a step back, hoping that she'd asked what's
going on because I hate confrontation. But she hasn't. She's
just acting normal. Am I being dramatic? Do I bring
it up even though it's been a couple months, or
do I just forget about it? Firstly, I don't think
you're being dramatic, And I think the reason that Sophie
maybe isn't bringing it up is there because there's probably
a slight embarrassment.
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Around it, do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (29:32):
Yeah, an uncomfortable nurse of Like, yeah, what she did
was probably a bit fucked, and it is a bit
fucked really like you were with your family friends. I
get that, But it's also like you do have sometimes
I have those friends where you just look at them
and go, girl, where does it end?
Speaker 2 (29:47):
Do you know what I mean? Like you're putting yourself
into ageous.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Situations again and again and again, and like everyone has one,
and I think my friends have grown out of that,
But there was definitely periods where I'd be like, do
you want to be kidnapped? Because that's how you fucking act,
And it's like you kind of there's really not much
you can do unless you kind of sit down and
explain it to them, and they will end up continuing
what they want to do.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
But I would bring it up.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
I don't think she's going to because yeah, maybe there
is a bit of embarrassment that she's like, oh, maybe
she's acting weird with me because I did that and
that was a bit weird and it was a bit
unsafe and like fuck, like so I'll just brush it
under the rug. So I would just mention it and
say you obviously worried about her, Like there comes a
point where you know you just want her to be
safe and you felt like her, you'd never ditch her,
you don't want her to.
Speaker 3 (30:29):
Do it again.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
I'd talk like, if you value it friendship and you
want to be friends with her, like, absolutely, mention it
to her.
Speaker 4 (30:35):
Yeah, I have a friend who is very similar to
what you were.
Speaker 3 (30:38):
Saying, is he and they're one of my.
Speaker 2 (30:39):
Favorite humans And you're like, girl, you want to die?
Speaker 4 (30:42):
Yeah, And I don't even get angry, and they're like,
I'm judging what you're doing way I don't want you
to well, i'd kind of done.
Speaker 2 (30:48):
Sometimes I do judge you.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
I'm like, you want You're putting yourself in these unsafe
situations again and again and again, and it's like you,
I want the best for you, and like I'm getting worried.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
Yeah, there's some people that have people like I.
Speaker 4 (30:59):
Don't know if it's a control thing, but I'm now
like I actually can't drive myself insane worrying about you.
Speaker 3 (31:04):
I don't know if that sounds bad.
Speaker 1 (31:06):
No, there's a lot of Like I think that's quite
common that you hit a point where you're like I
can't help this anymore. You're not listening to me, Like,
just know that I'm here if you need me to be,
you know.
Speaker 4 (31:17):
I think with this friend, it's like others around us,
and people will be so direct with her like she
is aware.
Speaker 3 (31:23):
That's a bit of a thing.
Speaker 4 (31:24):
I think every time I get concerned for her, I
just try and lead first with like I'm concerned for
your safety.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
I just really lead.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
It with safety, like not like embarrassment and like, girl,
don't go home with a guy you've met, Like, just
be like, don't turn your snap maps off. Like I
was really worried about you. I wish I knew where
you were, Like I would have liked to be in
the loop. You know, I'd never judge you.
Speaker 2 (31:45):
Yeah kind of thing.
Speaker 4 (31:46):
And it's even like, if you didn't like Brad, let's say,
it's almost not even worth bringing that up.
Speaker 3 (31:50):
I think bringing him into it.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
It's just like this is it could be any fucking guy.
Speaker 1 (31:55):
It's like, you just want to know that your friend's safe,
and I think you more lead with that and just
tell her that that's why you've been feeling because you
didn't really like how that situation made you feel.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
Good luck, girl, and good luck.
Speaker 3 (32:06):
He's done the follow up. We love follow up.
Speaker 2 (32:08):
Yeah, we do, all right.
Speaker 1 (32:09):
I met a boy when I was in Bali last
and I met you too cute, so sweet Anyway, I
genuinely thought it was just a holiday romance, but I
was telling all my family and friends he was the
love of my life. We hung out almost every night
in Bali until I flew back home. I'm from wa
and he's from Sydney. I've never had.
Speaker 2 (32:28):
Like a holiday fucking romance. I'm my dream.
Speaker 3 (32:31):
They seem a bit normal.
Speaker 2 (32:33):
Everyone has them. I'm like, it would be so much fun.
I've never had one.
Speaker 1 (32:38):
It's because I'm like. He got really unwell after I
got home.
Speaker 2 (32:42):
He's still in Bali.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
So I told him to fly to Perth because it's
quicker and I'd take care of him, not thinking he
actually would.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
He did. Oh my god, that's slay. He booked a.
Speaker 1 (32:52):
Flight, came to Perth, stayed at my family home for
about five days, came out to a friend's birthday and
we had a great time. Despite him still not being
one hundred perm that sounds really cute. Fast forward a
few weeks, he's begging me to go to Sydney. He
booked me a flight and off I went. I met
his family, his friends, and again we had a great time.
It's now been about a month of messaging and is
starting to die down whatever it was that we had.
(33:15):
I don't know if it's just because we haven't seen
each other, or if it's because it's fading. I also
don't know how long distance could even work. Hit me
with your advice, because I really did think he was
the one. I think long distance can work, especially state
to stay. But I think starting long distance, like starting
at long distance would be a.
Speaker 3 (33:33):
Chance you need to go trust before you Yeah, I
have taking that.
Speaker 1 (33:37):
I think you need to just give it some time.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
See if the mess.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
I think if the mess just continue to die down,
you kind of just have to let it die down. Yeah,
but I don't think do that whole like you know,
petty or he hasn't been fled in four hours to
well wait five, like text him and see if you
can kind of keep it going and maybe he's busy,
maybe he's doing things. But like if it dies down,
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but
I think you kind of just have to let it.
(34:05):
You live in different states, and it's not like you
can be like, let's go grab a coffee.
Speaker 4 (34:08):
Well this is like easy for me to say, but
like this is where distance is preferable because like you're
not going to walk into him in the street if
maybe he does say, you know, I'm not feeling the
same way anymore.
Speaker 3 (34:20):
Yeah, I feel like you can actually be so much
more direct suber message.
Speaker 1 (34:24):
Yeah, it's like because there's no worry that you're going
to run into But it's like, honestly, wo were easy.
But if it's meant to be all end up finding
its way back together. You never know, but I think yeah,
for now, it's like, don't be like hey, hey, hey Wayne,
you responding to my messages, but like see if you
can keep the convo going and if he starts putting
the effort in back, and if.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
He doesn't, you kind of just have to yeah, let it.
Speaker 4 (34:45):
It hasn't been that much time either, and no, nothing's
ever going to like things do have to level out.
You've had this like crazy stuff, yeah, oh my god,
like you've met something.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
Like I'm in love with this man.
Speaker 3 (34:55):
Yeah, and yeah, already traveling, which sucks.
Speaker 1 (34:58):
Don't get me wrong that it would be a rutal
feeling to think that it went from all of that
to possibly nothing, but it also sadly is the case
that that happens.
Speaker 4 (35:06):
Yeah, but I was going for bloody dates once a
week with my boyfriend and the lead.
Speaker 3 (35:10):
Up to us dating.
Speaker 4 (35:11):
Yeah, you're bloody traveling per Sydney, balih all around the globe.
Speaker 3 (35:16):
Like that's a hectic start. Yeah, I feel like it's
always going to seat.
Speaker 1 (35:20):
It's going to feel like a lull now that that's done,
because you've only ever known each other kind of being
in the same place. So maybe this is what if
you were to be long, This is what that would look.
Speaker 2 (35:30):
Like for you. Do you know what I mean? Yeah,
but you can't.
Speaker 1 (35:33):
Just have to see how it goes over the next
couple days and weeks, and if it continues to drop
off and drop off and he's not making any effort,
then don't make any happorad either, girl.
Speaker 3 (35:43):
And get that ass back to Balin, get that Bali.
Speaker 2 (35:45):
And finds O a new one.
Speaker 1 (35:46):
All right, guys, I love you so so much and
chat to you next week. We will have my stinky
stinky sister on Okay, Bye,
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Are You A Charlotte?
In 1997, actress Kristin Davis’ life was forever changed when she took on the role of Charlotte York in Sex and the City. As we watched Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte navigate relationships in NYC, the show helped push once unacceptable conversation topics out of the shadows and altered the narrative around women and sex. We all saw ourselves in them as they searched for fulfillment in life, sex and friendships. Now, Kristin Davis wants to connect with you, the fans, and share untold stories and all the behind the scenes. Together, with Kristin and special guests, what will begin with Sex and the City will evolve into talks about themes that are still so relevant today. "Are you a Charlotte?" is much more than just rewatching this beloved show, it brings the past and the present together as we talk with heart, humor and of course some optimism.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.