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August 7, 2025 β€’ 3 mins

πŸŽ™οΈ Episode 8

Title: “Do Four Guitars Make Me a Musician or Just Sentimental?”

The ADHD art spiral, brought to you by keyboards and one tiny violin.

🎡 [Imaginary intro music: Ukulele strum → record scratch → grand piano flourish → squirrel squeak → whimsical music box fade-out]

Hi. I’m Angela. Queen of Focus-ish.

And I have… a confession.

I currently own:

  • 4 guitars
  • 2 ukuleles
  • 1 baby violin
  • 5 keyboards
    (collected from friends, family, and possibly a neighborhood yard sale where I blacked out emotionally and woke up with a Yamaha under my arm)

Now before you judge me — know this:
I am not a minimalist.
I am an emotional curator.
I don’t collect clutter.
I collect versions of myself I’m not ready to let go of.

🎀 Every Instrument Is a Portal

  • One guitar was from my friend Bobby when he passed. This guitar was the closest thing to actualize my singer songwriter career during my brief stint in Franklin Tennessee.
  • One tiny guitar was for bonding with Cody, who strummed one C chord and promptly wandered off to play Minecraft instead of learning Suzuki Method.
  • The baby violin? Oh, that was aspirational energy. Inspired by a Pixar movie and three YouTube tutorials of kids who could play concertos by 5.
  • And the keyboards? I swear they just… appear. Like piano cats. Needy. Slightly dusty. Occasionally majestic.

They’re not just stuff.
They’re soundtracks to versions of me I miss:

  • 🎀 The artist
  • πŸ₯ The brave one
  • 🎧 The one who believed music could fix everything (and honestly… maybe it still can)

🎢 The Music Spiral

One morning, I decided to “tidy up.”
Just move things around. Reclaim space. Vacuum up some glitter.

Instead, I pulled them all out — every instrument.
I laid them across the room like a music museum curated by a very distracted squirrel.
Then I sat in the middle of it all, holding a sparkly guitar pick, crying to a playlist titled:

“Who Even Am I Right Now”

Because in that moment, surrounded by strings and potential…
I remembered I don’t just own music.
I carry it.

Even if I haven’t played in a while.
Even if my guitar is dusty.
Even if I only know four chords and they’re all moody.

🧠 The Real Breakthrough

I don’t need to master all of them.
I don’t need to form a one-woman ADHD folk band.
I just need to remember:

I am still the kind of person who keeps instruments in the house…
just in case a feeling needs a sound.

I made a little shelf for my ukuleles.
I gently dusted the keyboards.
I gave the violin a nod like, “Not today, friend. But someday.”

And that was enough.

🎡Subscribe to Doom Piles & Distractions.

Next episode: I try to sort my craft supplies… and end up applying for an LLC.

Until then:

  • Play something
  • Even if it’s one note
  • Even if you’re rusty
  • Even if your squirrel squad covers their ears in tiny headphones

🐿️✨
Learn more (or find show notes, playlists, and possibly emotional ukulele content) at AngelaDiCarlo.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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