Peter Meyerhoff

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:05):
Approache production for the record.

Speaker 2 (00:24):
Don't try and make you uncomfortable for the record. You
ain't trying world and stuff for your right for the record.
Lab on me going all the way way for the record.
I ain't trying to link, No trying to waste stuff.

Speaker 3 (00:36):
For the record, for the record, for the for the record,
for the red for the record, record.

Speaker 1 (00:49):
For the record.

Speaker 2 (00:50):
Don't try and make you uncomfortable.

Speaker 4 (00:55):
Season seventeen. How good has this been? And I am
so pumped today. A big shout out firstly to everybody
who's just come across five million downloads is just about
to hit.

Speaker 5 (01:06):
We are so pumped for this season.

Speaker 4 (01:08):
Our episodes have been amazing, our guests a second to none,
and today we have an international guest. Big shout out
to Sideways Serve for your constant support. Pod Shape always
in the background making things happen today, all the way
from the States. This man is somebody whom I truly

(01:30):
love his story and I know that you're going to too.
He's an award winning author, but before he became that,
he has one powerful story and that cost him twelve
years plus of his life.

Speaker 5 (01:43):
Better MAYHFF. Welcome to the clip. Brother, this is truly
an honor.

Speaker 1 (01:47):
I'm hono to be here, So thanks for having me.

Speaker 4 (01:51):
Like I said, you are an award winning author. You're
doing amazing things out here in community today. Your life
is much different to what it once was. But for
those that don't know who you are and the path
that has led you here today, let's take a little
walk down memory lane and give people an insight into
who peteries and where it will begin.

Speaker 6 (02:12):
Absolutely so, nickname is Chappie from a chapsick addiction. And
I got that, you know, when I was in prison.
But I'm going to tell you, guys, how what led
me up to that? You know, so I had well,
I wasn't.

Speaker 5 (02:23):
Going to introduce his Chappy because I know the story
a little bit beyond. And then anybody that called you
chappy literally got light out.

Speaker 6 (02:30):
So you used to have that permission or be an
OJ could call me CHAPPI yeah, for sure. So you
know I could say I had it all as a
kid in the beginning. You know, I was in a
movie as a kid, I had a modeling agent. You know,
I was a top athlete in sports, grew up in
a nice house. You know, my parents were not even
close to risk, but were just average and you know it,

(02:52):
it was good. And then yeah, well mom ended up
leaving my dad for alcoholism when I was like about
ten or eleven years old, and then when stayed with
a single mother and kind of raised myself for the
most part until thirteen fourteen fifteen. You know, she was
a flight attendant and just barely getting by. So flight

(03:12):
attendants fly over night, so you know, three four or
five nights a week. Maybe I was at home alone
as a thirteen fourteen year old, you know, and so
it was tough to get me to wake up to
go to school next day when there's no parent making
you go to school the next day. But ended making
it to high school and I had there's one night
that changed everything for me in high school and that
so led me down to prison. You know, I hate

(03:33):
even talking about this part of it, but I had
a fake sexual assaul when I was fifteen years old,
and me and my best friend back then, he asked
me to take them for the team. You know, my
mom was a flight attendant, so my house was the
party house on the weekends.

Speaker 1 (03:45):
It was freshman year.

Speaker 6 (03:46):
We weren't even driving yet, and he wanted to hook
up with her friend, and he and anybody knew I
could hook up with this chicken any day I wanted.
She was she had lost to Virginia, like in the
sixth grade or something, you know, like one of those chicks,
and we weren't even driving yet. So they snuck her
older brother, picked him up, snuck them out of their
bedroom window, dropped them off with the whole bottle of

(04:08):
Jack Daniels. And that Friday night, I lose my virginity.
We polish off a half the bottle of Jack Daniels.
He comes and picks them back up like four whatever
in the morning, sneak back in Saturday night, we do
the exact same thing, polish off the second half of
Jack Daniels. And I've now had sex twice in my life.
And then don't know to this day what happened. But
Sunday comes around and I was. I get home and

(04:29):
my mom is on the phone with her mother, and
the next words I hear is my mom saying there's
no way my son raped your daughter.

Speaker 1 (04:37):
And I was like, what the fuck? And I grabbed
the phone and hung up, and I'm like, what the fuck happened?

Speaker 5 (04:43):
You know?

Speaker 6 (04:43):
And then cop shop and so I going to I
offered to take a lot of detector test anything they wanted,
did whatever, swabs, all that bullshit.

Speaker 5 (04:53):
You know.

Speaker 6 (04:54):
She refused to take a lot of detector tests, went
got a rape kit and they saw that she had sex,
but nothing was damaged, and she didn't want to press charges,
of course, and then goes.

Speaker 1 (05:02):
To school ragging about it. On Monday.

Speaker 6 (05:06):
To this day, I think she got caught sneaking in
her bedroom window and it was like the first thing
that come into her mind or something. She didn't realize
it was that big, like it turned into that big
of a deal. You know, we're kids, and but you
know that next Monday, they start getting messages out of
school and like halfway through the day and they come
call me up to the principal's office, locked the school down,
and you know, I was a freshman kid, so like
they it was not safe there. You know, they were

(05:26):
getting worried that some bad was gonna happen to me
obviously that day, you know, and they locked me do
they locked the school down, and I decided to drop
out of school that day, you know. And it's it's crazy,
you know, and that now that I have a kid
that my parents just let me drop out of school.
But either way they did. I dropped out of school
and started hanging out with dudes that instead of playing sports,
do drugs. And I got introduced to crystal, myth, smoke, crack,
did ecstasy and everything for my first time, all that

(05:49):
same first week and hanging out with these new dudes,
and crystal meth got explained to me like it was
a fun party drug. That's literally what they said about
crystal meth. And I did not do crystal meth until
I was in treatment like nine months later.

Speaker 1 (06:01):
You know.

Speaker 6 (06:01):
We didn't take that seriously. And the problem with rehab
for me back then, you know, is it was some
dude that had a degree in substance abuse with a
freaking mustache that was trying to tell me how I
felt inside, you know, And I didn't take any of
that shit seriously, you know, which is why it's so powerful.
I feel like what we're doing now, you know, because
especially dudes coming from prison, we don't listen to no
one listen. We feel like you either have or could
walk the shoes that we walked before, you know.

Speaker 4 (06:21):
So, brother, I just want to touch on that because
this is so relevant to what we do here at
the Clink, and each episode is everything is based on
lived experience, you know, and I'm a massive advocate for it,
and I feel that people like ourselves who have lived
walked these shoes, you know, know what it's like, experienced it.

Speaker 5 (06:42):
We carry so much weight.

Speaker 4 (06:44):
I don't know about over there in the States, but
here it's very hard to engage in community service or
you know, giving back to the young people and sharing
your stories because of all the boxes that have got
to be ticked and ticked and all the politics around.

Speaker 5 (07:00):
And I get it.

Speaker 4 (07:00):
I get it because you know, we want to protect
our young people from predators and all this sort of stuff.
You know, we both know what happens to the scum
of the earth that cross those lines.

Speaker 5 (07:11):
Now.

Speaker 4 (07:13):
It makes it very difficult, though, when you do have
people lock ourselves that want to give back. And I
don't know about the States, how do you find that
now with I mean, obviously there's a lot of years
and a lot of great that you've done. Are you
able to be involved in these sort of things now
to inspire young people and others?

Speaker 6 (07:33):
You know, it's crazy, I am in a but a
lot of the more stuff I do is out of state,
because and that's what's crazy, Like Arizona is it's not
the worst, but it's up there with the worst, you know,
with prison time. It's like, and I'm not joking, I
would choose Arizona is probably one of the worst out
of the all fifty states to do prison time at.

Speaker 1 (07:49):
And they don't give a shit.

Speaker 6 (07:50):
About you, like when you're like a you know, Shakoh
and you're like politican on the high yards like that,
there's zero programs. You don't get out for shit, Like
there's nothing for you, nothing to benefit you.

Speaker 1 (07:59):
And like, right now, dude, I can go walk.

Speaker 6 (08:01):
I've been in you know, max yards in California, Utah
speak anywhere like and dude, it's great, Like when I
got the prisons in Utah, like the freaking you, I
walk the yard in the warden, like, lets me go
where every building I want to and I'll go down
the runs with the dudes just to talk to them,
you know. And out here in Arizona it's like and
that's a Maxi yarc, bro, And I'm like, I can't
even I can't go to a single yard out here
in Arizona. And they have my podcast on the tablets

(08:22):
on the yard.

Speaker 1 (08:24):
Think about that.

Speaker 5 (08:26):
Okay, so let's just take that for a second.

Speaker 4 (08:30):
So in America, in the systems, they can have an iPad,
is that correct?

Speaker 1 (08:35):
Or a path the tablets in their cells now, yeah.

Speaker 4 (08:37):
Okay, so they've only just started doing this in the
new South file system here in Australia, one of our
states where they've built these new and I believe they're
privatized jails that are based.

Speaker 5 (08:49):
Off an Americans.

Speaker 4 (08:50):
So think where it is, which is something you guys
have obviously lived with for some time, open open bunks
like fucking what I don't even like being two outlet alone,
having fucking eighty men sleeping and farting and fucking confident
spluttering around. Yeah, and they run a perimeter right safety
where yeah, exactly where the screws look down. Plus the

(09:13):
five million cameras that are measuring every every millimeter you take. Yeah,
that's been something that you guys have had for several
years over there, isn't it.

Speaker 6 (09:23):
I think they got him. Yeah, probably three or four
years ago or something. I had missed all that stuff, dude,
no joke, And I got out. I was still we
were still weren't even allowed CDs and maxim security. I
was bumping cassettes.

Speaker 1 (09:33):
I was bumping cassette tapes ten years ago. We want
now I got out.

Speaker 6 (09:36):
You could have CDs on three and on four, three
and two yards, but Max, you couldn't even have CDs.

Speaker 1 (09:41):
You're still bumping cassettes.

Speaker 6 (09:44):
Wow, I think about that, the old Tupac on cassette
because you couldn't even get new music on cassettes. You
didn't have nothing past like the early two thousands.

Speaker 5 (09:51):
You know, imagine that now?

Speaker 1 (09:54):
Yeah, oh yeah, And then not to mention.

Speaker 5 (09:57):
That they wouldn't know they would They wouldn't known how
to do John, now would they? Oh?

Speaker 6 (10:01):
Yeah, for sure. You got a fight to listen around music.
If you're a white dude, like on the higher end,
you can't just listen to rabb is it?

Speaker 5 (10:07):
What?

Speaker 1 (10:08):
Oh yeah, one hundred percent?

Speaker 4 (10:10):
Uh all right, well, let's I'm looking forward to getting
deeper into this conversation.

Speaker 5 (10:14):
There's a lot of pologics.

Speaker 6 (10:16):
That's funny now too, like me myself, like my wife's black.
There's no way in hell I could have let her
visit me when I was in prison. They would have
stabbed me and shut up after visit, I'm speechless.

Speaker 1 (10:27):
Yeah, Arizona's like that, wow.

Speaker 5 (10:30):
Wow, So okay, you you you've Let's go back to
your initiation into So was there any like youth detention.

Speaker 4 (10:39):
Or anything like that prior to you going to jail?
Or was yours just an instant whack?

Speaker 1 (10:44):
Nothing at all? I had.

Speaker 6 (10:44):
I had a few things right at eight years old,
just back to back, and then got happy with this,
and you know, I stole a Mercedes Benz brand new
from the dealership and that movie gone and sixty seconds
came out they said those cars are unstealed, and I
was like, yeah, I'm all right, I want to go
trans still and since they said that unstealbed me and
I had no idea log I could just came out.

Speaker 1 (11:00):
I had that thing like four hours, so I saw that,
got out on probation, and.

Speaker 6 (11:04):
Then my body the same court event did this thing
back to back, so three months later and I was
going away for twelve years.

Speaker 4 (11:11):
Twelve years, you know, going back here ten years is
what we called a brick, which was a life sentence.
Now yeah, obviously life is life now. So the ten
years basically is just to kick along and everyone's doing
ten years or eight nine, like.

Speaker 5 (11:27):
It's no big deal for you. You're a young man.
What was it?

Speaker 4 (11:34):
Like, I mean, let's go back if you're happy to
talk about it, and it's only.

Speaker 5 (11:38):
Brother, what was the crime and how did it all happen?

Speaker 6 (11:42):
And so that's what's funny, coming full circle and the
crime if that's what I finished the story with. So
when I started, so when that fake sexual thought happens,
if my best friend, best friend just says what happened,
it probably goes away. But he's like, I'm not getting
involved in this stuff. People just such pussies, you know.
So eighteen years old now and now I'm in the drugs,

(12:03):
doing math, stealing jack and I ended up. So he
was out of town, his parents were out of town.
Springbreag should have been my senior high school. And they're
the richest kids and all of our two he the
most spoilled, rotten kids, like fifteen thousand square foot house
with their name across their basketball court on their indoor
basketball court. And my brother and then berglized the house.

(12:23):
I went back with my friends to burglarize the house
that was already burglarized. They were not no guns, no
home invasion none of that stuff. And what I took
was a drill, you know, because tweakers knee drills, a snowboard,
Jordan basketball shorts and the Jordan's sandals and I got
twelve years in prison for that. My buddies has stolen
a bunch of jewelry that was upstairs in the master bedroom,

(12:46):
and everybody, out of ten kids, eight of them told
on me. And I had just gotten out of probation.
So I think I'm this tough ass kid. I'm like,
I ain't saying shit. You know, I was the only
one to wear gloves, but everybody else told on me,
and they just made an example at of me and
gave me twelve years in prison for a non dangerous
briery charge as eighteen years old, and I served eleven
years and ten months straight.

Speaker 4 (13:03):
It fathoms me I've had whom is a good mate
of yours or a mutual friend of ours?

Speaker 5 (13:09):
Sep Ferente, who you know was on here? Who did
you know?

Speaker 4 (13:13):
Massive amount of years for a non volume crime. You know,
it truly blew me away. Yes, I get it, it
was some LSD and you know whatever else that, but
no physical harm, no no weapons charges, no nothing and
he's doing over twenty years like it was just crazy.

Speaker 5 (13:31):
His story just blew me to pieces. And here we are.

Speaker 6 (13:33):
Real quick, let me and just just to put something
in the perspective real quick, and just to shout out
Marvin Haynes if you don't know who Marvin Hanses has
got looking up. But this is what's been like racking
my brain with lately. And I'm not joking since I've
met this guy, Like I've been really emotional, crying really
hard because you can and you might. You probably haven't
thought about it this way, but think about this, you know,
when you're even gang banging or like I consider myself,
no, no it was gang banging, but you know, run on

(13:55):
the streets doing all that stuff, like you know you're
going to get locked up, you know you're going to
spend some time. Your family probably knows you're gonna get
catsous amount of time went.

Speaker 5 (14:01):
Right and possi you know, you know the rules.

Speaker 6 (14:04):
Imagine if you're just a sixteen year old kid, you
did absolutely nothing wrong and then bam, just like that,
they snatch your life away from you. So not only
in that, that's what's crazier too. Imagine like how hard
it is doing time because when you're when we get
locked up, and you probably even thought about this, but
like when we get locked up, we know we're in there,
we're just wait until the release stated it is what
it is, this is what we did. We're gonna gangste
up and do politics or do drugs, whatever we do. Imagine,
if you're innocent, you don't know what to do in

(14:25):
the entire time. Not only you have to do time,
but you have to like fight and just try to
figure out how the hell to get out there. So
not only that I felt like I was so wrong
with my sense, dude, but I'm like so grateful and
I'm like so dude, some people have it so much
fucking worse, man, Like I got absolutely hosed on my sense,
Like I have the worst bogley in Arizona's history for
a non dangerous brewery charge, and I can't hold a
fucking candle to what they did to some guy like

(14:45):
Marvin Haynes or something, you know, And then it's crazy And.

Speaker 1 (14:47):
That's how life is.

Speaker 6 (14:48):
Pros Like people, for anybody that thinks they got it bad,
somebody else has it fucking one hundred times worse than you.
Without and like the in the blink of an eye,
and that's their life, not just a bad time, like
you're going through a bad time right now. This is
this dude's fucking life and this is what they live
every single day. And it's a hundred times worse than
what you're going through right now. And that's just for people,
because I feel like people are so weak minded in
this world and they're so quick to fold and like

(15:09):
just you know, depression is so huge now. It's like
I don't mean out sound cliche, but you know, like
people that think they got it shitty, there's one hundred
thousand dudes.

Speaker 1 (15:17):
That would die to have the life you're living, you know,
Like and.

Speaker 6 (15:20):
I'm working through this myself right now, man, because I
I'm and I'll be real about this, Like this has
been my biggest work right now, because.

Speaker 1 (15:25):
Like I got sober, and like that's my thing with AA.

Speaker 6 (15:28):
I got sober, and I kind of plateaued, you know,
and like I got sober ap for a few years
and then like you get busy working and making money
and you know, now I got a family and it's
just like I did nothing with recovery work after that,
and it's like I just got busy, you know, and
it's just like I didn't fucking heal. It was so
fucked up inside me, you know, and like I'm still
fucking to be honest, Like I've been sad as shit
about it.

Speaker 4 (15:47):
And like.

Speaker 6 (15:48):
My wife's like an All American volleyball player, like grew
up Morman, like just master's degree, like you name it, right,
didn't have a sip of alcohol till college, like one
of those women, you know, and like, yeah, I had
never even met her, and before you know, the chick
I was with was a stripper and she was like
what the hell, Like what would you be doing with
a stripper? And like I always had this mindset that
I was so fucked up inside that no normal chick
like that would date me. Like I told i'd have

(16:10):
a one night standley keeper, like I would never try
to date you, you know, And then I end up
dating her, and then it's just like real life hits you, bro,
And it's like cause she don't put up with the
ship that my ex would put up with it in
two seconds, you know. So like I feel like I
had to grow up on a fly, and not only that,
but now like and then I have a kid, so
like I not only that, but like I have to
grow up on a in a blink of an eye
for my son now too. And it's like really quick,

(16:31):
I realized, holy shit, this is where I picked this
up from, from watching my dad do this shit, you know.
And it's like so now it's just like I have
to grow up overnight. And then I have to like
fix my temper that I didn't fix my I got
sober and like all this other ship that I kind
of brushed to the side because I gave myself a
pass like I'm sober.

Speaker 1 (16:44):
It is what it is, you know what I'm saying.
And it's like I'm killing it.

Speaker 5 (16:47):
That's it. I'm out of here.

Speaker 1 (16:48):
Yeah, that's what I told myself.

Speaker 5 (16:50):
I'm winning. Yeah yeah yeah.

Speaker 6 (16:52):
And I've been like going to be honest, bro, I've
been going through it. I told my wife, is like
I feel like I'm bipolated because like I'm the happiest
I've ever been in my entire life.

Speaker 1 (17:00):
Like I cannot, like I cry sometimes.

Speaker 6 (17:02):
Just pulling up to my driveway, you know, and then
and like I just like I'll lose my temper or
something like that, and I just feel like I'm a
wreck and I'm so mad at myself that I'm not fixed,
and I'm just like and then I have my part
of myself, Like how the fuck can you still be mad?
You know, I'm like, look at your life, you know,
Like when I got out of prison, you do you
couldn't get I couldn't get mad, like no matter what happened.
Like you know, it's like, but people lose that gratitude

(17:23):
and they lose their perspective on life and they fall into
the shit.

Speaker 4 (17:25):
You know.

Speaker 6 (17:26):
I'm a victim for myself and I've been That's why
I'm not joking. I was so excited to do this
podcast here because I've done nothing for the past since
I've had my son, I got married and like built
a house, Like I haven't done any podcasts.

Speaker 1 (17:36):
I haven't done anything.

Speaker 6 (17:36):
I launched the book and didn't even promote the book
because I've been too busy and.

Speaker 1 (17:40):
I need to do like this.

Speaker 4 (17:42):
Yeah, and you know what, Peter, I'm actually very honored
and grateful brother, because look, you are making some massive
waves and you're doing so many good things, and your
story is one fucked up story.

Speaker 5 (17:52):
Like I know you speak about Marvin and listen.

Speaker 4 (17:55):
I don't know whether we can hook Marvin up and
maybe give him a platform here to share his story.
But if you know of any way that we can
network with, sure, please reach out and let's do that,
because I think we have enough network over in the
States now after having some wonderful guests on the clink. Absolutely,
you know we could give him a place to voice
when he's ready. Obviously, you know, going back into what

(18:18):
you said, especially you know that whole self awareness. I
know with myself, my last stretch was six and you know,
in total, it's been fourteen years. It's it's very hard
to come home and we've had this. I've had this
conversation several times with guests before. It took me almost

(18:39):
a year even just to want to come out of
my bedroom. I'd come home from wherever and I would
just go straight into my bedroom, put the TV on
and my bed. But it was like a cell. But
I was safe, I was comfortable, and that was my space.
My wife and my children be like, Dad, you're going
to come out for dinner.

Speaker 5 (18:55):
Ah, yeah, I'll be.

Speaker 4 (18:56):
Out and ment or maybe I might just eating here,
or you know, it got to the point where nobody
could truly understand how traw aumatized and it is. It's
traumatic because we go into a system. And once again
for Marvin, that's not somebody who's lived that life. You
and I live that life. You and I just lived

(19:17):
that street life. You know, like you talk about a stripper. Yeah, okay,
with a stripper, she's probably using your user and she's
providing coin.

Speaker 5 (19:24):
You're getting coin. It's a team effort. Whatever. There's highs
as lowers. That's why you're together because you both have
the similar ways of thinking and lifestyle. It's beneficial for you, guys,
get to be together.

Speaker 4 (19:37):
Now.

Speaker 5 (19:37):
Then you have your beautiful wife and you know, like I.

Speaker 4 (19:41):
Have twenty one years with my children's mum, same lady,
you know, very straight, very you know down the line.
Never brought her into that world and never brought that world.

Speaker 5 (19:52):
Into my other when the couples keep the fucking door
in obviously, but you know what I mean, Like, it's
not something that we here he goes chappy chapping, gotcha,
I see the addictions. Real, that's your sober stick chick.
You should start selling them, brother, maybe you should start

(20:13):
producing them.

Speaker 1 (20:15):
I want to.

Speaker 4 (20:16):
Oh wow, But I mean my point being, you know,
like we adapt, it's in us to adapt. So when
you're confronted with that, you're locked up, you're gone through reception,
you're sitting in cells.

Speaker 5 (20:29):
You know, you feeling that energy, that negativity, just that
heaviness of everybody who's just in limbo.

Speaker 4 (20:36):
Most haven't been sentenced some heavy shit. There might be
beef that fucking comes in off the street. You don't
know who you're.

Speaker 5 (20:42):
Going to bump me in that small little cell of
you know, twenty thirty blokes waiting to get processed. You're
a young man.

Speaker 4 (20:49):
Yeah, okay, you've you know, you've been around and like
you said, you know you've been in an environment. Now
you've been sentenced to twelve years. You're not the same
man that you were prior to that. Your whole mindset
has to shift. I remember sitting on remand for you know,
the best part of twelve months. I played guilty to

(21:11):
commercial importation. I was looking at double figures. But because
I took her an instant guilty plea, I didn't bring
anybody else in there.

Speaker 5 (21:19):
There was no case. It was just I was caught
in the controlled delivery. That was it.

Speaker 4 (21:23):
You got me done. End the story put my hand up,
cut my time. So you know, six years was my
sentence for that, because you get a twenty five percent
reduction for an early guilty please, so you're not taking
the court's timer.

Speaker 5 (21:36):
Oh nice, that was one thing.

Speaker 4 (21:39):
But then my wife was pregnant, so for me, she
was four months pregnant.

Speaker 5 (21:44):
I'm sentenced and I'm going, fuck, that's six years, all right? Cool?
You know, like I heard her in the background in
the in the in the courts go no, and I
turned it. I looked from the box and I'm like,
it's all good.

Speaker 4 (21:57):
It's all good, because in my head I was ready
for a double figure, you know what I mean. And
the cop to six was like, whoa, not that I'm saying,
that's a good thing.

Speaker 5 (22:07):
It's not being tough.

Speaker 4 (22:08):
That was just like mentally, which you understand and many
people who are listening today will get that. That's how
you have to have your mind for someone like Marvel
or anybody else out there that's only going to start
to go through this process. It's not one process. You
want to involve yourself. You do not want to go
down these roads. Talk to us about you and what

(22:30):
it all was like, because man, I know that we've
got some pretty hard sort of jails here in Australia,
and the way our system is is quite full on.

Speaker 5 (22:41):
I don't feel that our gang units or anything like
yours there.

Speaker 4 (22:45):
We do have, you know, a lot of hard men,
and there is a lot that goes on behind the scenes.
But I feel that the America's always held that top
bar and it's just one place you don't fuck with.
I would never want to do a day, let alone
twelve years in the States.

Speaker 6 (23:00):
Yeah, and the consult to California, Amazon, if you asked me,
protext are the worst, pretty and you know, the hardest,
and the California even like at least Texas and California
programming Arizona to shift for you. If you're on the
higher outs, you're just locker and you're never getting out
of there. So and that like my mindset was, and
that's what it was, the exact opposite of yours, you know,
like I was. I was expecting to get four and
a half six My lawyer's home was the top sized kid.

(23:23):
I remember telling Verbania, you fucking promise me, I can't
get six years in prisons, No way I can do
six years in prison, you know. Yeah, And they told
me I was going to get to four and a
half and I was encountering jail like twenty months already,
so I had like almost two years back home.

Speaker 1 (23:35):
I'm thinking I'm out in a year hopefully, you know.

Speaker 4 (23:37):
And so Pete just sorry, I just and Ie if
you could just take his just through that little explanation,
because the system is so different there.

Speaker 6 (23:44):
Yes, state time is just anything if you each state
has their own prisons and stuff. Federal time is anything
like banks involved, You're across state lines, you know, so
it's got to be multiple states involved or like with
banks like our robbery banks. I know for some reason
because I think it's a federal reserve, but those are
federal crimes.

Speaker 1 (24:03):
I'm set front. He like you said, since it was
a multiple state.

Speaker 6 (24:05):
Lines of a Fed crimes and it was I wanted yep, absolutely,
but so and then if not, if you're just no
matter how much drugs or how much whatever you're doing
in Arizona, it's it's just Arizona stuff. You're out there
in Arizona. The Feds are better, if you ask me,
like wait, way way better, way more freedom. They have
way more money because it's backed by the federal government
instead of the brocast states. So like they did I

(24:26):
think steak once a month there you hear all kinds
of shit, man, but they get to wear like nice
khakis and shit, Like, dude, we wear the worst straight
orange nothing else.

Speaker 1 (24:34):
You get three outfits.

Speaker 6 (24:35):
You don't three showers a week where I'm from, Like,
it's nothing like that in the Fed fed You're getting showers,
you get nice sweatpants, all that shit, you know. And
then they, like I said, each complex has like each
yards are known for being the gangster gradiator school yards,
you know, and each complex has them, like even the
you know, central office, which is like the people that
are in charge of where you go and stuff, and
cops know, you know, they send the gangsters to these yards,

(24:57):
you know, and they kind of just like let the
cops have at it with them.

Speaker 1 (24:59):
And those are like and that's right the time, and
you know, it's crazy.

Speaker 6 (25:02):
I hate it at first, I'm claustrophobic, and that at
the end of my send, I loved it because like
I would hate when they'd lock the yard on with
some petty as shit, you know, Like, but when you're
on those gangs, ears grow like I've seen a stabbing
and like the open yard up. Still you'll still got
a chow in the afternoon time. If there's a stabbing
in the morning, you know, it all depends. Like they
didn't like staff the stalls or staff stabbings, they would
fuck with you on that. But like if it was
just one like between the same race and shit like that,

(25:25):
get the weapon off the yard and olden year old
right back up.

Speaker 5 (25:28):
So no lockdowns.

Speaker 6 (25:29):
Yeah, But then at other times, if there's like a
bunch of stabbings where it's like in a race stabbings,
like a black dude stabbing away, do something like that, dude,
you could be.

Speaker 1 (25:37):
Locked down for fucking months. Yeah, wow, literally months.

Speaker 4 (25:41):
How did you find it being And don't take offense
to this, but you were just a skinny white boy going.

Speaker 1 (25:48):
In lest I was one hundred and forty four pounds.

Speaker 4 (25:50):
Big man's I've seen a picture of you and I
was just like, whoa. But then I've also seen, you know,
the pictures of you in the growth of the years,
and obviously your adaptation and your training and so on
like that. You come in and tell tell our listeners
what it was and how you had to go about
stamping your naming there just to basically.

Speaker 5 (26:12):
Know that you know, you were gonna Yeah.

Speaker 6 (26:14):
So that's the thing, because like I was not only
like was I one hundred and forty four pounds, like
the youngest kid, I'm fresh, you know, eighteen.

Speaker 1 (26:19):
I think I was nineteen by the time I.

Speaker 6 (26:21):
Hit the yard, and I used to model I was
in a movie like long blonde hair, like straight, as
pretty as it gets, you know, and like I was
on the like I was running the streets, but like
I was not a gang member, you know. So like
a lot of the game gamers grow up around dudes
that been to the joint stuff, Like I had never
met some one that had been in prison before I
went to so I was still a little naive to
that stuff, you know. And also I'm going off as
like you know what you're here in the county jail

(26:41):
and what you see on that ship, you know, And
all I know is but here's one thing I used
to box luckily, and I'm just going in there with
the mindset like fuck. My mindset was literally like I'm
gonna make God pay forgive me these twelve fucking years,
Like just fucking watch what I did. That was literally
my mindset, and.

Speaker 1 (26:55):
You know, I kind of had to have that mindset
in there, you know.

Speaker 6 (26:57):
And I remember I could just you know, I'm really
really good at vibes and just catching vibes if people
and reading, you know, like I'll look two people face
and I could tell who's line. I mean, who's not
for the most part, you know, I feel like that's
one of my good character traits. And I remember hitting
the yard and I'm and I could just tell, like
they did not fuck with me, and like they just

(27:18):
come to find nothing. I'm thinking I was gay because
I was such a little pretty boy. But the dude,
the dude that was running my building, you know, he
was like the size I was when I got out,
almost you know, two hundred and thirty two hundred and
forty pounds something. I was too sixty when I got out,
but he was just huge, you know, twice my size, and.

Speaker 1 (27:32):
He did not like me.

Speaker 6 (27:33):
We'd live right next to each other and he would
like kind of throw the little jabs at me. Know,
so I was like, I'm going to make an example
of this dude, you know, And we're playing cards and
so on.

Speaker 1 (27:39):
In a prison yard two in Arizona.

Speaker 6 (27:40):
It's like, say there's eight buildings on the yard, you'll
have the there's usually there's like there will be a
north yard in the south yard, and you'll have one
dude that's got the key to the entire spot.

Speaker 1 (27:49):
And then you'll have a lot of times if if
I had it like that, I'd have a dude. You
have a dudeh running each side of the yard for you,
you know.

Speaker 6 (27:54):
But any decisions you they come through you because there's
so much stranger thrown.

Speaker 5 (27:57):
In the yards Austin.

Speaker 4 (27:59):
You know.

Speaker 6 (27:59):
Oh, sometimes you go out to two or two hour
wreck and you only get three RECs a week, and
you don't even get to work out because you have to.

Speaker 1 (28:03):
Talk politics the entire time, you know, and.

Speaker 6 (28:05):
You have a line of races waiting to fucking talk
to you, you know, and oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 (28:10):
That was the worst part about it.

Speaker 6 (28:11):
But then so they'll have like a north and south yard,
and then each building will have someone that runs each building,
and then on top of that, then each building person
will appoint each different run, so a person that runs
each run, and everything runs down the chain of command,
you know, and you want the guys running the buildings
to handle the building stuff. If it's something bigger, obviously
it has to come out to the yard. But so yeah,
a lot of the shit and that's why run in
those yards kind of sucks because it's his drama all

(28:34):
day long.

Speaker 5 (28:35):
But how many men, how many men Peter are each
in each and here in Australia we call them wings.
So is that what you're referring to as a building
or Yeah?

Speaker 1 (28:45):
Pretty much like on a four yard where I did
most of my time, there's.

Speaker 6 (28:48):
Fifty twenty five sales top bottom and then.

Speaker 1 (28:52):
ABC and D pods, so four hundred I think per building, and.

Speaker 6 (28:56):
Each one split in half, so A pod only sees
B pods, seapot only sees D pod and.

Speaker 1 (29:00):
You never see each other. Yeah, And it's like control movements.

Speaker 6 (29:03):
So when you go to childs, you all walk in
one group with Charlie Pok walks itself and then when
dog Pob gets out, the nick come out of the chowhole.
And that's how four yeads are ran. M wow, we're
going to This is how the whole prison career starts.
That's all I was gonna tell you. So I end
up we're playing cards in his house and I tell
him after I tell my little bunky right there because

(29:23):
he said some of him on his playing cards in
his house and there's nowhere else to go, you know.
So it's like, whatever, you're not going to do that.
So I was like, this is where I'm gonna make
it a point, like making a mission. This is I
kind of like gave myself a little it's a little
heart check for them, just to show them like I'm
not like, do you know you're gonna respect me whether
I'm one hundred and forty four pounds of long blonde
hair or not, you know. And he tells us after
count that we're not allowed to play cards in his house,
and I said we are, and he says, and you

(29:45):
know it's crazy. He's the one that ran the rules
down to me when I got there. So he tells me,
he's like, if you even think you're going to get
into with anybody, you take off on him. He's like,
there's no sucker punches in prison. He's like, you know
why they called a sucker punch?

Speaker 5 (29:56):
So you heard this, Yeah, it's like a dog dog
shot like stuff.

Speaker 1 (29:59):
No, do you know why they called a sucker punch?

Speaker 6 (30:00):
So no, this is what he tells me when I
first hit the yard, He's like, because you're the stucker if.

Speaker 1 (30:04):
You get punched. So he's like, if you someone's get
into it, you just fucking take off on him.

Speaker 6 (30:07):
So it's all right cool, So I use that against him,
like when he's like, run his mountain, we're not going
to play cards. And then he literally tells you, literally, young,
punch with something of these, respect your elders and then
goes to take the chew out of his mouth to
turn around. I'm on top of him in four seconds
and just beat the Brakes office dude, right.

Speaker 5 (30:21):
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (30:22):
And then I go from like I told you, I
can tell no one in the yard wanted to talk
to you.

Speaker 6 (30:25):
You're just like you go from like even in school,
I was popular knowing I'm on the yard. Now I'm
like a full on nobody, and I could just tell,
and I was like, this is going to be a
lonely ass twelve years, you know.

Speaker 1 (30:33):
And then the second I beat this.

Speaker 6 (30:34):
Dude up, and then I got the chower and now
there's like the OG's waiting at the building for me
to now meet me and say, hey, there's a little
kid here doing twelve years. You know, they just beat
the brakes off the dude running the building. Some dude
will probably go introduce themself to this guy, nfair of
what his plan is here, you know, And so then
they come out there.

Speaker 1 (30:50):
Now all these dudes want to shake my hand.

Speaker 6 (30:51):
And say hi to me, you know, and then now
the dude running the yard wants to talk for me,
and I go to wreck the next.

Speaker 5 (30:55):
Time, So why would there be drama after that?

Speaker 4 (30:58):
Like I know, from a point of view here, when
it comes to politics, fair enough and rightfully, so you
stand up, you take your ground, and you fucking deal
with it and you come out.

Speaker 5 (31:08):
That's it.

Speaker 4 (31:09):
But unfortunately here there's always some little fucking politic around it.
Like you know, we have an issue with what they
call bup, you know, the the subottexts and all this
sort of stuff that you know, gets shifted around. So
what we're seeing is a lot of people come out
of PC now and they get brought into the main

(31:29):
because they're on the program.

Speaker 5 (31:30):
And then all of a sudden everyone's around him.

Speaker 4 (31:32):
That guy could be a fucking pedophile or a known
full on dog you know, informant, but he's cool.

Speaker 5 (31:38):
He's cool.

Speaker 4 (31:38):
We got him we're sweet. We've locked him down. He's
our boy, you know what I mean. You just keep
spitting it out, buddy, and we just keep looking after you.
How does that work in there? Like, for example, you've
just taken out the main guy. You're a nobody, You've
come in off the street. How did you not upset
somebody in there and then all of a sudden retaliation
for you taking out that main guy.

Speaker 6 (31:58):
No, because he's not the main guy. He's just a
guy around the building, you know, Like it's not like
r here. And also it's when I'm running yards, like
if a dude wants to square up, challenge me, and
it's on me to still fight no matter who it is,
whether it's a kill or not, even if I'm running
the yard, I'll be real. The only people that there's
no hands policy and are fucking untouchable and like literally
no matter what they say goes is actual Arian Brotherhood members.

(32:21):
So and which there's none of them on the yards.
They're all slammed down in SM two. They complete twenty
four hour day lockdown, so none of them are actually
on the yards anymore, you know, and when someone earns
their patch, they're gone right away.

Speaker 1 (32:33):
And they never see the daylight again anyways.

Speaker 6 (32:35):
But so anybody else, you're, yeah, you've got to square
up with someone, and you know, like that's what they said.

Speaker 1 (32:40):
We almost fought again afterwards, but to.

Speaker 6 (32:41):
Be honest, the dude did not want no more smoke
with me, you know, so we didn't fight him.

Speaker 5 (32:45):
But that was it.

Speaker 6 (32:45):
And that's what your dude run the yard said. He
if he has a problem with then it's on him
to fight me again.

Speaker 1 (32:49):
Yeah. Wow fuck yeah.

Speaker 6 (32:51):
So then I like think but that attention was addicting
as a kid, you know. And then I was like
I remember thinking like overnight, I was how am I
like this is gonna be lone last twelve years? Like
I got to figure something out, you know, And then
you get the attention that I was like, all right,
this is what I can do, you know. And then
he's like he ask if I want to start putting
in work and I'm so close. I was like, what
do you mean putting the work? You know, he's like
smashing like snitches or sex ferns. I was like, oh
hell yeah. I was like the only thing I'm not

(33:12):
down to do is I told him from the jump,
the only thing I won't do is no comic ouds
And she's like, I'm not going to stab people in
front of cops and shit like that.

Speaker 1 (33:17):
That's the only thing I said, you know, because I
was even though it was a twelve.

Speaker 6 (33:20):
Riars, was like, I didn't I've always said it was
fifty to fifty.

Speaker 1 (33:24):
I was gonna ever make it out of there.

Speaker 6 (33:25):
Not in the beginning. You know, I still wasn't just
gonna throw in the towel right away, you know. So
that was the only thing I said I didn't want
to do. And you know, I built a name for
myself just fucking whooping dudes asses at first, you know,
for a few of them, you know, and then it's
like it's I mean, it's it's a it's.

Speaker 1 (33:42):
A pretty small world in there, you know.

Speaker 6 (33:43):
Especially in the higher scirity yards, you know, so everybody
talks and you know, and they I mean, there's you know,
big bad dudes around you kind of know, and it's
and then but you know, by the time I was
twenty three years old, I ran my first four and
after that, you know, I would run everything I touched
for the most part, you know, if not like one
of my boys did that have the yard, you know,
older together and I loved that shit, bro I like,
I loved it, and I lived for that stuff, and
that's all I wanted. And it's a dumbiesh in the world,

(34:05):
you know, Like, you know, I just have, you know,
racist shit tattooed across my stomach, you know. And my
wife's black and my son's a core black. And it's
just like you risk years or life sense is earning
that shit, you know, and then burn it off your
body and you get out the most painful.

Speaker 1 (34:18):
Shit in the world, you know.

Speaker 6 (34:19):
And it's like when I met my wife, I had
to tell her that because I had like one session
but it was still on there, you.

Speaker 1 (34:24):
Know, and I was like, like the second what was it?

Speaker 4 (34:26):
What was the sort of tatoos that you would have?
Would it be like Arian brother stall tattoos? So is
that is that your affiliation or White Pride or something
like that.

Speaker 6 (34:34):
I mean, yeah, white pride, but they had like Arian
Brother they have their own patches like a war burd
and stuff. But like, yeah, we get like white pride there.
It's huge out there to get swastikas lightning bolts, like
I had to almost fight them to for this iron
cross right here. They were like trying to make me
put a swastka right there, and I was just like
did I almost did it when I was a kid too,
just because like like but you don't even think I

(34:55):
didn't even know what the.

Speaker 1 (34:55):
Fuck it really was, you know what I'm saying. But
like that's just what they do to you.

Speaker 6 (34:58):
And I feel like they do that so like you
have no chance and you get out, like with those tattoos,
you're always gonna come right back to them.

Speaker 5 (35:03):
You know.

Speaker 6 (35:03):
It's like, yeah, and when you notice, like the people
that I looked up to and there are just the
fucking biggest scumbacks for the most part of them, you
know what I'm saying, And it's just it's just the worst.
I hate prison and everything about it. That's why I
just want to fix it and just trying to help
people have been there.

Speaker 5 (35:16):
You know.

Speaker 4 (35:17):
I love that, brother, And you know that's a beautiful
thing that we do here on the Clink is you know,
we share these true stories. They're not edited, they're not
something that I put apart just to make it sound
all pretty in that this is your journey, this is
your story, and you know it's one of those things
where we have to tell it as it's not to
be glorified, and like you just said, you hate it,

(35:39):
I fucking hate Joe. Brother to me, it's I put
it down now to we're both sitting here in this
moment being able to help people through our lived experience,
and how blessed are we to be able to have
come out the other side and survived. And look, we've
both got our demons, there's no two ways about it.
And things will never leave us. Things will always be

(36:00):
stuck up here that we've got to deal with. You know,
you talk about bipolar on typed two, bipolar, you know,
sexual abuse.

Speaker 5 (36:06):
As a child.

Speaker 4 (36:08):
Like we could go on and on and on, but
is that what we do or do we sort of
go Okay, we've gone through these things to enable us
because of the men that we are, we're obviously strong
enough men and warriors withinside to help those that aren't
as strong, you know, to give them the guidance to
try and bring them to a point in life where

(36:29):
they realize that.

Speaker 1 (36:29):
There is a better way.

Speaker 4 (36:31):
I think that you know, we can sit here and talk,
and I know that we've both sat at the table
with some powerful players over the years and seen a
lot and you know, experienced a lot, and there'll be
a lot that will take to the grave. And that's
just how it is, like it or not, that's life.
But you know you're in an environment where at any

(36:53):
said time you could be the victim of a bashing,
a stabbing. You've put it out there. You know, you've
become physical in the yard. People know you're now a challenge.
You know, like if I come into the and I
can take you out, well I'm the next guy a
because you did exactly that the first time. How did
that feel being a young guy And I know what

(37:13):
you said just a minute ago, that adrenaline feeling of
walking the yard and you know a little bit of
a chest pump, no one knowing your status, knowing your status,
but man, you're a fucking target, bro.

Speaker 1 (37:23):
I was, to be honest, it was nerve wracking. And
that's and that's why I hate Like every day.

Speaker 6 (37:28):
I used to make a joke and I was like,
watch me just get whooped one day by the smallest
dude on the yard. Had a pure bad luck. That's
what That's what I used to joke about. But like,
uh yeah, I mean there is there is and you
that's why you got your shoes tired all the time.
But like when you're the shot car too, so you'll
never be walking the yard by yourself. I always, you know,
rolled the yard with your soldiers there with you. So like,
could I have gotten into somebody, yes, but like no

(37:49):
matter what, if someone's going to try and do some
stupid like these kids would literally rip his face off,
or you'd even get anyone new, you know what I'm saying.
And like if someone tried to say something stupid to me,
like even like on a basket coat, if we got
into a little if a dude say this, if a
white boy like raised his voice out me, like in
the basketport while we're playing a game. My youngsters probably
literally after I we're done, would be like begging me
to get like let them go get them, you know

(38:10):
what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 (38:11):
And I'm like, no, no, liked it. But that's how like,
that's how it.

Speaker 4 (38:13):
Is there so to earn their stripes because they disrespected
the seniority of one of.

Speaker 6 (38:18):
Yeah, and they just want to show that they're down
and loyal, you know, and like a lot of them
are brodcast kids and I'm feeding them dinner every night,
and you know, and they do my laundry, but I
feed them and shit like kids are hungers hell in there.

Speaker 1 (38:27):
You know, they'll do anything for food. Bro.

Speaker 6 (38:29):
What's crazy is that's how so when I told you,
when you become like a brother for the Arian brother
or the Mexican mafia, those the guys that are in
Seme two and they never get out. So when you're
running yard, you have to sell drugs and you have
to make money, like it's a business. So you have
to and what do you do with that money is
you just send it to se Me two. So it
all goes to SME two and we'll send it to
their ladies on the yard, and they give them money

(38:50):
on the commas and they make sure all those guys
are at least at they at least they have food
because they're in there all day and they can't do anything.

Speaker 1 (38:55):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, And they paved the way for us.
Because another thing people don't know about this is like
no joke. Back in like the early eighties and late seventies.

Speaker 6 (39:02):
And century in Arizona was the most dangerous person in
the United States of America. The reason that Aaron brother
was formulated was because white dudes were walking back with
their store sacks and getting their commissary taken and getting
raped by black dudes that were twice their fucking times,
you know, and it was predominantly black.

Speaker 1 (39:18):
Or Mexican back then. There wasn't a lot of white people.

Speaker 6 (39:20):
So as the number, I think the numbers just changing
something like that, and they formulated it. And so, like
I said, that's why when dudes like we bring in
a you know, announce a heroin, they have to break
us off twenty five percent for a yard tax.

Speaker 1 (39:31):
And they don't want to do that. And I'm like, if.

Speaker 6 (39:33):
It wasn't for these motherfuckers, you get your entire shit
snatched from visit, you know what I'm saying. So that's
why they paid twenty five percent yard tax, and then
it's on me. I have to take that money that
drugs can sell it and send the money to se
me too.

Speaker 4 (39:44):
So okay, let's just hypothetically, and we're saying hypothetically.

Speaker 5 (39:48):
Here, I'm out on a visit. Some balloons come in, I.

Speaker 4 (39:52):
Get them through next minute, fucking regurgitate them, shit them out,
you know as they do whatever. Thank straight, you got
someone watching me. You know what's going down, you know
what's coming out, and it goes straight to you.

Speaker 5 (40:04):
And you start to do tribute, then.

Speaker 1 (40:06):
I I break the shit off.

Speaker 5 (40:08):
Yes, yeah, that's my point.

Speaker 4 (40:10):
And then obviously the guy that sort of brought it in,
whether he's brought it in, try to be sly, whether
it's an organized thing, does he get sort of benefits
from it where obviously he's using.

Speaker 6 (40:20):
A quarter and a quarter, so like you use if
you're bringing in an announce and you could say that's
why I used to say, if you you could sit
in a cell and not do any legwork and you
bring announce, you're getting half of it because a half
of quarter go to your attacks or no other quarterbolls
to the mule.

Speaker 5 (40:30):
And do you guys protect that guy though, or can
I still run it on that guy and take what.

Speaker 4 (40:34):
His quarter was, or if I did protecting, he's breaking up.

Speaker 6 (40:38):
And the reason he's and the reason he's breaking up
twenty five percent is because when he needs to get
his money collected, if no one's gonna pay him, who.

Speaker 1 (40:43):
The fuck is he going to run into to get
to the cornet?

Speaker 5 (40:45):
Yeah? Wow?

Speaker 4 (40:47):
Fuck yeah, So it's not too it's not too different
in a lot of ways.

Speaker 1 (40:50):
It's crazy how similar but different everything is.

Speaker 5 (40:53):
Right, people just have no idea to do that.

Speaker 4 (40:55):
And I think this is a midiful thing of being
able to talk to someone like yourself who's lived it
and you know, truly experienced it.

Speaker 5 (41:02):
While we're on the subject, I've got.

Speaker 4 (41:04):
To ask you you you've been in a little bit
of a bit of a war of words with someone
who idea I just think is an absolute piece of ship.

Speaker 1 (41:14):
Besides for sex offenders and sholdlessers, there's not a.

Speaker 5 (41:17):
Hes Watson or something.

Speaker 1 (41:19):
What's Wes west Watson.

Speaker 5 (41:24):
I can't help her bring this guy up like everybody's
so sucked in by his multi million dollar empire. Motherfucker,
I'm the shoe king and I'm the fucking lamball this
and you're just a fat, fucking suck my dick. If
you're fat and you're not, shut the fuck up.

Speaker 6 (41:39):
Yeah, And he served four years and he got shipped
out of state. Like that's what people don't even know.
He didn't even serve ten years. He got he served
four years.

Speaker 1 (41:45):
And someone that's.

Speaker 5 (41:47):
Got some facts, so let's hear some facts, because.

Speaker 1 (41:49):
He served four years. If he said he served four years.
He didn't even do California time.

Speaker 6 (41:55):
He was so non violent they sent him from California
to Arizona. Wes Watson's prison time was served in Arizona
on a minimum security prison yard.

Speaker 5 (42:04):
He fashed all these people. He's a hard man. He's
a shot caller. What are you talking about?

Speaker 1 (42:08):
You got what? Yeah? What a salt case? Anybody getting
a sull case?

Speaker 6 (42:11):
And like I said, just because you got him one
a saw case, just you gotten to fight this me
and you go to the shoe program.

Speaker 1 (42:15):
You know what I'm saying, calls bro the shooter. Shot callers.

Speaker 5 (42:18):
Not he's a shot caller. He's the fucking badass, motherfucker
shot caller. Where's Watson is the fucking king.

Speaker 1 (42:26):
West is the biggest pussy.

Speaker 5 (42:28):
He's mom's so fucking gangster, lit up.

Speaker 6 (42:31):
That's why I said, Wes Watson's mom's fucking more gangster
than that pussy's asset.

Speaker 1 (42:34):
Seriously, Like, and I told him.

Speaker 4 (42:36):
At that, Oh, this is why I'm asking you because
you know, like everybody has this.

Speaker 6 (42:40):
I even told when I saw that video of them
jumping those dudes out of that gym, because I had
a cell phone. He tried to get bad with me
one time, and he thought I was one of those
little internet tough guys, and I I put have checked
that's real quick, as like I'm like, you know, I
told him verbat him. I said, I said, google me, motherfucker,
I'm the dude who claim to be That's what I
told him. And then you fucking checked his words real
quick on me. So I had to cell phone him.
So when I sent him that thing, and I'll show
you the screenshots, but I sent him a screenshot or

(43:01):
I sent him a video of that Ballerbuster thing where
they shared shout out to ballerbus is too, where I
share that video where those four dudes jumped that dude
at the gym, and I was like, fucking pussy as motherfucker,
you're so lucky.

Speaker 1 (43:13):
I wasn't like just threatening his ass. He read it
and didn't say a word back, but it said.

Speaker 6 (43:17):
To see it was nothing good about that, just like
he's like one of those main dudes that just like
anybody in the world when you talk to if you're
not tough, you know what I'm saying. And he built
his entire life and image off a dude like me
telling him what the fuck to do when he was
in prison and figured he'd get out here light enough
people and people have no clue and people are he had,
he had a good niche at first, because people are

(43:38):
fascinated with prison.

Speaker 1 (43:39):
And people are such pussies out here.

Speaker 6 (43:41):
They're scared of anybody that looks like that, and a
lot of dudes are just lame as fucking want to
be yelled at by another grown ass man.

Speaker 5 (43:48):
I mean to me, I love fronting people like that
because I think to.

Speaker 1 (43:53):
Myself, I've been trying to fight him.

Speaker 6 (43:55):
So, like I said, tell everybody, I would love to
set up a fight out.

Speaker 1 (43:59):
Don't it every time? With donating every dollar to charity? Dude, Like,
what the hell? Why not? You know what I'm saying, Yeah,
that's literally hard fights.

Speaker 4 (44:03):
You know what, I think that it be a fucking
fantastic thing. And he's here's the cue, right, You're you're a.

Speaker 5 (44:10):
Stand up guy. You've been there, You've lived your life
and you don't live that life anymore.

Speaker 4 (44:15):
But you don't call uh, you don't call shit, you
call a spade es fate. You're very real, You're authentic,
and your story there.

Speaker 5 (44:23):
Is checked out. So for me, what more could you offer.

Speaker 6 (44:27):
Now you've got to back checks your ship when you're
on Base TV. It's like they'd get suit if they're
loud about my story.

Speaker 1 (44:32):
You know, I was on exactly right.

Speaker 5 (44:35):
What is the fascination with this guy? And what is it?
And and mabe fuck, why can't we get you two
in the ring and create the new like Jake Paul
and Mike Tyson fucking fight, except a proper fight.

Speaker 6 (44:46):
Literally, And I don't know, he's a He's just a
pid dude. Like I said, people just fascinated with prison.

Speaker 1 (44:52):
He blew up off my buddy. He's my buddy, Big
Herb from the Fresh Out series.

Speaker 6 (44:57):
And he lied about that everything you said on there,
like you try to say Keyscher's.

Speaker 1 (45:01):
Paperwork, and like paper work's fifty hundred p long.

Speaker 6 (45:05):
You shove fifty pieces of paper up your ass every
yard you went to fucking lame Like everything he says
is a lot.

Speaker 1 (45:10):
You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 6 (45:10):
That's that's a big shelf, bro, Yeah, that's the person.

Speaker 1 (45:14):
That's the first thing I heard him say. I was like, Oh,
this dude a strike full of shit.

Speaker 5 (45:17):
You know, that's a monster's safe.

Speaker 4 (45:20):
Imagine how to snookde how a snookery.

Speaker 6 (45:24):
I guess maybe he can't what that's what you call
a real solid brief.

Speaker 1 (45:29):
Yeah, literally, but that's what he said. That's why I
knew that dude's whole ship was fake.

Speaker 6 (45:33):
And I didn't say it, to be honest, I never
said anything to him until but I find it. I lookally,
just took a fence when he tried to say that
he did shoe time, and that's when I said something
to him. Fine, and that's when we got into it
because like I was like, dude, I'm like, I'm tough, bro,
I don't need to prove myself to nobody. But like
I just took a fence to when he was acting
like he did shoe time, because like that place almost
broke me, bro, like, and I would have killed myself
if I could have when I was in there, you know.

(45:53):
Like so I just take offence to people act like
they did time out there. Like everybody that's been to
prison out here is like, oh I was on the
higher yards and I was on and like they don't
even say they were like they did half the time
and didn't put in any work, didn't do the politics.
And like the reason I hate those because I did
all that, but I talk against that shit. You know
what I'm saying, Like I don't brag about that shit,
Like it's not cool. Like what's cool is doing what

(46:15):
I'm doing now, And what's cool is changing your life.
And like what's cool is going into the prison now
and tell them to do that.

Speaker 1 (46:19):
That's gangs.

Speaker 6 (46:20):
Listen where it's at. Yeah, for real, and you don't
think that's gangs. Come trying and say something to mend percent.

Speaker 5 (46:26):
And you know what, I'm the same brother. I'll walk
any street and hold my it up high and look.

Speaker 4 (46:30):
You know, naturally, as you know, with the way social
media is, you're going to get the hater.

Speaker 5 (46:34):
Is you going to get the people that right you off?
Your this shit that blah blah blah whatever. They'll never
see you on the street, they'll never confront you, but
they're quick to throw in the comments and they're good
to make these calls.

Speaker 4 (46:46):
By you one hundred percent across the road as often
that as it has happened.

Speaker 5 (46:51):
You know, what, what do you do?

Speaker 4 (46:53):
What do you bring to the table through your lived experience?
It's making a difference in other people's lives because I
know my value, I know who I am. I know
my story as like yourself and hence us being here
today because it's all about trying to make a difference
in other people's lives by sharing our lived experience. So
people don't go down these wrecks because they're worthless. There

(47:15):
is nothing good about being a yard shop caller wasting
twelve or fourteen years of your life. Yeah, at that time,
it's fucking mad. You think you're killing it, but you
know what you're You're easy. Like I say, you could
have been the one getting killed on the yard for
being what.

Speaker 6 (47:30):
And not only that, yeah, not only that, Like do
you see where I am now in life? Imagine how
successful it be if I did something productive with my
prison time. You know, one thing I think we talked
about this before is like people from prison need to
hear from people like us or people that have been
in the trenches and stuff. They need to hear from us,
you know, Like it's not going to be some dude

(47:50):
with a substance a degree telling them how they feel
when they're on drugs or when they're feeling when they're
withdrawing or something like that. You know, it's gotta especially
dudes from prison high yards in prison, like they won't
even on a yard, especially, like they won't even listen
to word you're saying unless you've done on time with
the four or five yard, you know. And it's like
and the more higher yards, the more respect you get.
And it's like and it's that's how it should be,
and it's it's just uh like when I was there.

(48:13):
I remember when I was first on a three yard,
I was like almost not bummed out. I was like
kind of crapped. I was like, God, I gotta go
at higher yards down you know, these fucking fools know
I'm down, you know, Like that was like liter in
my mindset. I was a kid, so I'm like I
got to get there. So my first time going to MAXIM,
I was twenty three, like the Big Dog's Sense unit,
which was the most dangerous prison. Like I was excited
to shit. I was like, finally I can say I've
been here, you know what I'm saying, And like literally

(48:34):
got there, got handed the building the keys to CV
one right when I got there, and it was just
a I always say this, like at least the stuff
in my prison time worked out perfectly. And when I
say perfectly, I mean like completely fucked up, but like
it did the perfect thing it was supposed to do
with building my name and image. So I have a

(48:56):
real story to share it here, and I can get
through to the worst of the worst people, you know
what I'm saying. I'm the only one that goes to
the high high yards out here, you know. And I'll
walk up the high yard with any duck cops anywhere,
you know, and like and there's nobody doing that, you know.
And it's like, you know why, because those guys won't
just listen to anybody, you know. So it takes guys
like us to do that ship, you know, which is
why I'm so passed about working with them, because no

(49:16):
one's ever done that shit before, you know, so, and
it always, just.

Speaker 1 (49:20):
Like anything, like it all falls downhill.

Speaker 6 (49:22):
So if you get the shot callers being good people
and change their lives and being good dads, what do
you think the soldiers are? And then the people that
want to be soldiers? You know, it's like it all
rolls downhill, you know. So if we can get the
all the big top alpha mega guys to make it
cool to be a fucking dad and change diapers and
be sober and just do good ship, Like why the
fuck up man think much out of the world would be.

Speaker 5 (49:40):
I love that.

Speaker 4 (49:41):
I am just on going into the levels that you're
talking about, and I'm just trying to just break it
on down here for our listeners here as well, because
obviously it is a slight difference. So here we have
our classifications. Obviously you've got you know, your your high risk,
your ease, your a's, your you know, supermax, down to

(50:04):
your medium minimum, which is you know, C one, C two, C.

Speaker 5 (50:08):
Three uh, and obviously above that you be.

Speaker 4 (50:11):
Is that what you're referring to when you speak of
three yard four yard signed druck show?

Speaker 1 (50:17):
Yep.

Speaker 6 (50:17):
So we have one yards which are like work camps,
like you got to be two or three years and under,
like some of them don't even have fences around. You
can literally just scape any day if you want it.
Then they have minim security yards, which is like five
years under, which is still pretty much the same shit.
And then you have three yards, which is medium security
and that's as low as life ers can go. So
it's control movement, but it's dorm living and that's like

(50:38):
the that's like a minimum security for lifers. And then
four yards close custody, which is sales, but it's two
man per sell, and there at least they're nice yourself.
They're like, I want to say six by nine or something,
and it's two of you in there.

Speaker 1 (50:50):
And then it's control movement.

Speaker 6 (50:51):
So but you only get three recks three showers a week. Yeah,
so even for it, you only get three RECs three
showers a week. You only go to you get to
walk to chow twice. They even bring your sack lunch
to your sales, so you only leave your thing twice
a day just to walk to chow. Control movement, and
then you have MAX on top of that, which is
MAX is fucking twenty four hour day lockdown. You get
three hour wreck cages a week where they shackle you're

(51:13):
cuffee behind, escort you to a wreck caage, lock in
the wreckage, and you get to walk around in circles
for fucking an hour. And then SMU, which is it's
the exact same shit.

Speaker 5 (51:24):
It's strictly Is that like Strict Management Unit.

Speaker 6 (51:26):
Yeah, it's a shoot program where like they don't even
they take your TV from you, They take everything like that,
so it's like you have literally nothing except except your mattress.

Speaker 5 (51:33):
I'ld I allow you do.

Speaker 4 (51:34):
I let you have a Bible or a Quran or something,
just a bible, just a bible.

Speaker 1 (51:38):
And I remember what I would do in there the
entire time.

Speaker 6 (51:40):
I would just do one and a half steps like
that's that was the entire cell. And I would just
lean because it's usually freezing calls. I'd have my just
blanket wrapped around me and I would just do one
and a half steps to the door.

Speaker 1 (51:50):
And then to the wall, and then to the door,
then to the wall. And I would do that for
twelve hours a day.

Speaker 4 (51:56):
And even doing segro here in Australia, you know, like
you literally you're on a lockdown which is twenty three
and one most days or twenty four. And if they
pull the screws off that wing which is skeleton staff anyway,
and they need them in the central prison, you don't
get access to nothing.

Speaker 5 (52:13):
You get no fucking nothing forget your phone.

Speaker 4 (52:17):
Moment correct, And you know you have this tiny little
square off the back of the cell, which is obviously
walled on either side. It's got a cage off the
back and the only way that we can control the run,
or not control, but communicate on the run was someone
would do a cook up, for example, and you'd get
a rubbish bag, you know what I mean, and you
tie it up, the plastic rubbish bag or something you

(52:37):
contain it in, and you'd run a little bit of sheet,
you know, get the string off the sheet, and you'd
lass do it and it just goes sliding up and
feeding it back up, you know. And sometimes if you're
in with a good crew, someone each day would do
a little cookup. And when I say a cookup, it
wasn't something you'd fucking sit out and eat a restaurant talking.

Speaker 5 (52:55):
Just some tune or in a bit of two minute noodle.

Speaker 4 (52:58):
And if you're able to sort of get an egg
or something smuggled in through someone that you might have
known through what we call here a sweeper, which is,
you know, the guys who have done a bit of
time that take care of the wing in the in
those units, you know, keep it clean, the floors, will
come up to your door, give you a book or
that's about the only communication.

Speaker 5 (53:16):
And then obviously you can do what you need to
do if you now you know you're in the right
click there, but you just you lose all sense of communication.

Speaker 4 (53:26):
And you lose all sense of actual you know, being,
your mental health suffers, and the only thing you can
do is, if you're lucky enough, is read a Bible,
read a Koran, or basically try and keep yourself busy.
And this is the reality of it. And there is
nothing good about it, and there's not there's nothing good
about it.

Speaker 1 (53:48):
It's so bad.

Speaker 6 (53:48):
I never even read, like no joke, when I would
be in that cellarous a button or if I could
did even get a book, I'd never even read because
I'd read a chapter demion Ai. I was reading so
like And that's why I like give myself to be honest,
I kind of props it more now because not only
did I do like horrible the worst time, in the
worst state, and did it gangster as fuck the entire time,
but like I have eighty d so and I couldn't
even read like other people could read, you know what

(54:10):
I'm saying, Like it was horrible for me. So like
those times when I was in those shoe sell or
like just salter with nothing like yeah, I felt every
second I couldn't take a minute of my.

Speaker 5 (54:19):
Peace need to read.

Speaker 6 (54:20):
Yeah, because even I'm reading, I'm scattering thinking when the
fun I'm gonna get out of here and I can't
think about nothing else, you know.

Speaker 1 (54:24):
So I was like, I don't even trying to.

Speaker 4 (54:26):
Read moving forward from that, because there is so much
more to who you are and what you're about today
and what makes me really prouder. I guess to talk
about this next part is you know you you didn't read,
but yet you're an award winning author.

Speaker 5 (54:42):
I mean that right there. That is commendable.

Speaker 7 (54:44):
That is huge thank you's, and you know it's it's
cool because a couple of things I'm most proud about
with that stuff, and that my obviously my son and
my wife or my hands down most prior and joy
like I don't know how like I have anxiety every
day like how I pulled the shot off and I
keep like and it seriously gives me anxiety, like think this.

Speaker 6 (55:02):
This, this, I gotta wake up when there's no fucking
winning my life now, you know what I'm saying, like, yeah,
and that's that's seriously what I what I think about
daily with them.

Speaker 1 (55:12):
But my book is you.

Speaker 6 (55:14):
Know, it's cool because I got out, so they said,
my last eleven months in out here in Arizona, I
was in solitary confinement again under investigation for attempt to murder.
They didn't stabbed the dude, but they said I'd called
the shot on the guy that got throw us to
the NIE.

Speaker 5 (55:30):
And that's because of your your your position in that.

Speaker 6 (55:35):
And so I sign my last eleven months in there,
and I remember telling them the SSU officers, which those
are like the gang detectives in there, So if you're
getting book, it's the SSU cops. So I remember telling
them like, yo, like when am I getting out of here?
You know, like I'm going home after twelve years, Like
I told him, like you can't expect me to like
make it from salitary confinement and then just like get
it when I got out on the streets. You know,

(55:56):
that's how naive I was. And they're like, we don't
give a ship. They're like miss They're like, miss my off,
we're done with you. Like we're gonna let their That's
what they told me for They're like, we're gonna let
the streets have their luck with you. We're done with
her in here. You're gonna sit in this cell until
you go home, like whenever it is you. But you
will not leave that cell till you go home. And
that's what they said. They said, they're gonna let the
streets be done with me. So like I made up this,
you know, Like I when I came down, I always

(56:17):
had to overcompensate, you know, because I was from I
with two and I was a little pretty boy, you know,
and so I was like, I remember, like the OG's
on the yard, like the gangs, Like even the cops
would say, oh, you know they hear so and sols
hitting the yard, and you know, like the.

Speaker 1 (56:26):
Cops were talking about it.

Speaker 6 (56:27):
I remember, like I just want to be one of
those dudes where like fucking cops are scared and they
hear myer house hitting the yard. That was my whole
goal when I when I started putting a work in prison,
you know. And now to have had that reputation and
some and instead of that now like I'll get random
emails or like cop will send me a message on Facebook,
you know, and like dude, can't believe your podcast on

(56:49):
the tablets in here, you know. And it's like so
now my book is on the library and the prison
and my podcast is on the tablets in there, and
they're hearing it from.

Speaker 1 (56:56):
Now where think about this.

Speaker 6 (56:57):
So there's dudes that were sitting in s me too
when I was there, not only like think if they
could have been on the yard when I'm calling the
shops and then ten years later now that this a
podcast and I'm telling them how dumb oh that shit
I did was and which it calls change your life
and being productive. Like that's why it's going to make
such an impact for those guys now because like I
live that fucking life. They know that, you know what
I'm saying. I live that life more to the tea
than they did. You know what I'm saying. If I'm

(57:18):
telling you this is where it's at, this is where it's.

Speaker 4 (57:19):
At, I think that's phenomenal. And the you know, like
like I said, you know that's credit to you. And
giving back is one thing, but actually physically engaging it
and making that conscious effort to be able to make
change is huge because it's hard for us to be
accepted and for us to, I guess, find out our

(57:42):
place because it is hard coming out not knowing where
you really stand in society, or a man that's just
done you know what we call what was what was life?
Ten years As I said in the start, you know,
ten years of brick that was life. It's no longer obviously,
but it's a long fucking time. You know, you are
mentally physically acclimatized to jail life, and it's every day

(58:04):
coming out. You're literally wired to what's going on. Your
ears are wide open, your eyes are wide open, you
do not relax, and at all times you're ready to go.
You can't live like that outside. I mean, yeah, let's
be honest, A lot of it does come out with us.
And I know myself that I'm very alert everywhere I go,

(58:25):
no matter what I do.

Speaker 5 (58:26):
Not for any need or paranoia or anything. It's just embedded.
That's just how it is. You know, you just become
that person. But is it a bad thing? No, because
I feel that it's enabled me to be a better man,
you know, bringing the positive out of a negative.

Speaker 1 (58:46):
Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 5 (58:49):
How does that work for you? Like, do you feel
like when you're I.

Speaker 4 (58:53):
Guess somewhere where you know something kick off, like you
CeNSE it because obviously you would be big on body
language reading and you know back, but your back's always
in the court, you know, you walk out.

Speaker 5 (59:06):
I still to this day.

Speaker 4 (59:07):
Yeah, Yeah, you scan the room before people even know,
you know, who's who in the room and what's what's
what within.

Speaker 6 (59:14):
And what's funny is my family is to drive them
nuts and they be like pay attention to me or
this and that, you know, and like when I'm out
to because I'm like I always put my back and
so I'm looking at everything.

Speaker 1 (59:21):
The whole time. And it's still to this day I
do that, you know.

Speaker 6 (59:24):
And it's like they got to the point where at
least the stop bitching about it, you know, and they
just like make jokes about it now because I'm like
I'm not. I can't help it, Like it is what
it is, like, this is there's no way to not
be this one.

Speaker 4 (59:33):
With your book? What what what is actually in the book?
Let's talk about it and what are we reading on?

Speaker 5 (59:40):
You know.

Speaker 6 (59:40):
So it's it's the longer version. Yeah, it's the longer
version of my full story. And then like really really
how I grew up and like it's it's more in
depth and details, full like autobiography. And then it's like
I got you know, like positive shit that I've learned
from prison, you know, and I put all my own
twists and I wanted people to like listen to that
book and like think or read that book and think

(01:00:01):
that they can take on the world and they can
achieve anything.

Speaker 1 (01:00:04):
And then once you get don't reading that book, not only.

Speaker 6 (01:00:06):
Do you feel more gratitude because like you here how
fucked up my life was and how great my life
is now. And like it's said, like I talked about
before with Marvin, like it makes you think, like, holy shit,
what the fuck was I bitched about it? Like I
thought I had this problem, you know, or like I
was bitching I couldn't get this job because I didn't
have a college degree. So like this dude had an
eighth good education did this so like I wanted to
unlock new potential of people, you know, like the biggest

(01:00:27):
thing that they do. Yeah, so please, if you would
on Amazon against all ours of it, please do go
buy my book, read it and shoot me a DMN
afterwards at what do you think about it?

Speaker 1 (01:00:36):
Please? And then yeah, yeah, yeah, let me know.

Speaker 5 (01:00:38):
What you think.

Speaker 4 (01:00:39):
We link it in with my socials, bro, We'll make
sure that we can get it out there, and we'll
promote it as much as we can for you and
help you, you know, like because I feel that you know,
these these books are good reads. And you know, I've
had a lot of guests that have come on, some
that are still here and some that have passed, some
real ogs that wrote.

Speaker 6 (01:00:57):
I have buddies that know me, like I've had friends,
no joke friends that got the book. And my buddy
Josh Dwayne, who's that He's a really big dude. You
could look him up too. And he literally got the
book one day and read it two days straight and
was like, literally send me a video of him. Dude,
he was like literally walking through the airport read it
still he's walking. He goes, oh my god, I'm mad
this parbab. I can't put this book down, like literally

(01:01:18):
just back.

Speaker 5 (01:01:18):
To back like that.

Speaker 1 (01:01:19):
And he knows me, he knows my story. So like
it's just more in depth than everything.

Speaker 6 (01:01:23):
And I co wrote with another actual author to make
it real professional and stuff. And it's a great book.
I got seller two months after he was out, and
the two things. And I'm like I said, most proudly
besides that is my podcast and that because you know,
the podcast changes so many lives on the streets and
in prison. You know, like I wake up to dms
every day from all over the country of different prisons
that were like, holy shit, I just this this I

(01:01:43):
just got out, or oh my god, I was listening
on the podcast in the tables.

Speaker 1 (01:01:46):
I can't do. This is really you, you know.

Speaker 6 (01:01:48):
And it's like and I talked and I talked to
all of them, Like I said this, I talked to
all of them until I get too big sore. I
can't talk to all of them, you know what I'm saying.
But like I give him, like I'm I'm the people's people, bro.
So like I said, like God saved my life to
give the rest away, you know what I'm saying, Like
I've I've I should have been dead so many times
and my last fetanalvals when I was dead and he
brought me back to life.

Speaker 1 (01:02:06):
He saved my life to do this mission.

Speaker 6 (01:02:08):
And like I'm doing people at disservice if I don't,
and like I shouldn't have had any money or any time,
so I give up all my time to anybody that
needs it. And like I'm the most generous person, especially
when dudes getting out of prison or whatever, Like I
like seriously, because I shouldn't have shit, But I always
keep that mindset and the second I feel my mindset,
I'm stem back ten ten times backwards.

Speaker 4 (01:02:29):
You know.

Speaker 5 (01:02:29):
I respect that.

Speaker 1 (01:02:31):
I respect that ipally other and I was like, I
was like, I love some lady.

Speaker 6 (01:02:34):
I don't remember it was, but it wasn't even crazy
like fifty bucks something like that, and I it was
someone that was struggling like that. And I told him,
was like, listen, I shouldn't have ship. I should be
just like you, like some fucking miracle. I have this money,
like please just take it from you, know what I'm saying.
And that's how I live life. I shouldn't have shit,
and like if you don't, and I feel like it's
a it's good to do that and have that mindset.

Speaker 1 (01:02:52):
You know.

Speaker 6 (01:02:52):
It's like the only like I'm all about being confident.
I'm on the borderline of cocky and confident. But you
always got to be hump with you Know what I'm
saying that you just always remember you come.

Speaker 5 (01:03:05):
I love it, I love it. But you're humble. You're
very humble.

Speaker 4 (01:03:09):
I will and we've had chats offline, so I can
honestly say you you're a very humble man, and you're
an inquisitive man.

Speaker 6 (01:03:16):
I'm a good person more than anything, you know what
I'm saying, Like I don't like to the core, not
only because here's how I look at it now that
I have a relationship with God, Like not only am
I a good person to my wife and to my kids,
but like I'm an even better person when I'm not
around them, you know. And I don't shoot on my
fucking wife, and I don't fucking do disrespectful shit to
women on Instagram to there, and like I'm a great son,
like the best father to my son.

Speaker 1 (01:03:38):
Like I don't know, I.

Speaker 6 (01:03:38):
Wouldn't like I wouldn't smoke a cigaretron him. I wouldn't
do anything in front of him that I wouldn't want
my son to doing. And he's grown up too, you know,
Like I take pride in that, you know, Like I
changed more diapers than my wife when I'm at home.

Speaker 5 (01:03:49):
I don't care how proud you are, look how proud,
well yeah cool, I don't care how long love that.

Speaker 1 (01:03:54):
Yeah, That's exactly what I feel now.

Speaker 6 (01:03:56):
Yeah, because I've always talked about sobriety more and I
feel like I have such a calling out to like
sobriety is what it is.

Speaker 1 (01:04:04):
But like I said once, you get.

Speaker 6 (01:04:05):
Sober disober, then you've got to do more shit than that.
Like I'm I just take such pride and how good
of a dad I am and I I wasn't raised
by the best dat you know, And that's just it is.

Speaker 4 (01:04:16):
What it is.

Speaker 1 (01:04:17):
You know, you don't even I want to.

Speaker 4 (01:04:18):
I want to ask you something, Peter, and when you
talk about sobriety, because we haven't really touched too much
on it, we didn't, you know, obviously suggested that you
got into the drugs in your earlier years. But that
was so much more to your life the drugs, wasn't it.
You were a full blown addict. You were an addict
in jail, like you just said, Fenton All overdose.

Speaker 6 (01:04:38):
So I mean almost last month, Marri, you see that
scar right there, almost got it with one arm. That
was right before I went away too, like a year
before I got on almost last my arm.

Speaker 5 (01:04:48):
What was it like using in jail? I mean, I
know what would okay?

Speaker 4 (01:04:53):
So here's free it's called remissions where you just free.
You're in jail, but you're not in jail, you know.
And this is why Ron will.

Speaker 1 (01:05:00):
Well And that's what I say.

Speaker 6 (01:05:01):
Now, Like I've been having such a hard time because
and I'll be real, and I just only told a
couple of people this later. But I'm just I choose
to be a completely open book. And like I always
thought that it's so sick to even say this, But
like I always thought.

Speaker 1 (01:05:13):
No matter how.

Speaker 6 (01:05:16):
Successful I made it, or how much money I made
or where what peak I got to, I'd always one
day either fuck it up or just smoke myself because
life is stressful as fuck, I hear, you know, And
like the one thing, like I said, that's why I said,
I cold feel bipolaric sometimes because like I had the
best life on earth. But like, dude, I have so
much stress that you can tell you right now, you know.
And like I'll tell you one thing that's not stressful.

(01:05:38):
Sitting on a four yard shooting Heroin, having your youngster
cook for you, through your laundry, do whatever.

Speaker 1 (01:05:45):
I mean.

Speaker 6 (01:05:45):
You only have twelve TV channels, but you're sitting there
just watching the TV channels, and like it's it's not stressful.

Speaker 1 (01:05:50):
What's stressful?

Speaker 6 (01:05:51):
It is, like I said, being a great dat being
faithful to your wife, and this temptation everywhere, like being
the same person that whether if it's God was in
front of me, our wife was in front of me.
You know what I'm saying, it's like, and then when
I'm wrong, realizing that I'm wrong, and like fixing shit.
You know what I'm saying, it's it's like, and then
dealing with emotion where not not only I've never even
dealt with emotion before, because I didn't know that.

Speaker 1 (01:06:09):
When I was in prison, I.

Speaker 6 (01:06:10):
Just snapped on everybody, you know what I'm saying, or
like if I got upset, I'd go get high.

Speaker 1 (01:06:14):
So I have never.

Speaker 6 (01:06:14):
Properly known how to deal with like being uncomfortable, which
is what I am having to learn right now at
forty years old with a kid already, you know, and
I'm like, fuck, I'm gonna fuck this up, you know.
But now that I don't have that seriously, like now
that I have a son and a wife and another
son coming like any day, like, and now that I
that's not an option to smoke myself or to die
or to like it's it's to be honest, it's terrifying.

(01:06:37):
And it's all because like another thing, what another plan
that I had was, I was like, I'm just gonna
go commit some crimes and some other who I say,
like Alaska that has a laxass prison. I do the
rest of my life in there like that and just
chilling and have no stress of doing rest. But those
are my mindsets, Like that's what I thought I'd eventually
end up doing, you know, and now that like I
know that's not an option anymore whatsoever. It's like I'll

(01:06:58):
be really it's kind of scary, and I'm working through.

Speaker 1 (01:07:01):
It as we speak. Like I said, I've been doing
just a lot of self work.

Speaker 6 (01:07:04):
Later that I havn't done any podcast or anything for
almost two years now, and I've just been doing the
family stuff. But like I said, I'm at a point
now where I feel like this helps me as much
as it helps people listen to this too, you know.
So this is the first one getting back out of.

Speaker 5 (01:07:16):
There, and oh mate, and thank you again.

Speaker 4 (01:07:19):
And I just want to say, though, I think you know,
when you hear what you just said, then you're constantly healing,
You're constantly better in yourself, and you're always in a
position where relapse is always very real. You're in recovery
every day. You know, you don't just come out of

(01:07:40):
addiction and just stops. Like you said, there's so many
trigger points in life that can just for that moment
say fuck it, I'm just gonna have one tickle, I'm
just going to have a shot, I'm just going to
have a smoke, whatever it might be, you know, like
just to get over this little hurdle right now that
I can't seem to see.

Speaker 5 (01:07:58):
The end of the line at and there's no light
for me at this moment. But I know if I
got high, I'll feel good. And you know what, Yeah,
you're gonna feel good for that second, for that moment,
for that heat, for that rush, but from beyond that,
there's nothing good coming.

Speaker 6 (01:08:13):
And what's even worse than that is your problem doesn't
go away. Your problems still there the next day, and
then you wake up already having anxiety because you fucked
up and you win against your word to yourself, and
then only that you have anxiety because that fucking problem
is still there, and not only that is probably a
little bit worse the next day, and then you realize,
like fucking getting high didn't do anything, And then you
know what happens usually for me especially, I'm thinking about
all those three right there, and I'm like, fuck it again.

(01:08:35):
You know what, I'm saying, go right back to it.
And then after two days of doing it, back on
the streets.

Speaker 4 (01:08:39):
Yeah, and there guys, all your hard work, and they guys.

Speaker 6 (01:08:42):
Everything thrown away in that and I'm fucking blinking eye.
And this is one thing I want to make this
real clear to viewers and listeners like this, like this
like the one good thing and the reason I've been
able to get to where I am right now is
because like, no matter what, I pause before I do
anything rational, Like there's been times that I wanted to
fucking relapse, but no matter what, I'm like, if it's
the right move, I mean, it's gonna it's gonna be
the right move when my emotion calms down. And that's
the only thing that I've done completely right, is I've

(01:09:03):
not made any crazy decisions.

Speaker 1 (01:09:05):
Because you can.

Speaker 6 (01:09:05):
Throw your fucking life away so fast, so quick, and
be dead and literally a blink of an eye, and
people don't realize that, Like these drugs are too strong nowadays,
and like you can fucking like get a bad thought
and then literally when two minutes go from having a
fucking family and kids to being dead, like in your house,
in your bathroom, Like it's that fast now the drugs
are that powerful, and like people are depressed, Like it

(01:09:27):
happens like that all the fucking time, and like that's
why I just like want to urge people.

Speaker 1 (01:09:31):
Like if you think you got a bad you might
right now.

Speaker 6 (01:09:34):
But it's not forever, you know what I'm saying, And
just hold the fuck on, man, don't go drink and
don't go use. It's only gonna make the problem wors
you know what I'm saying, Like, figure it the fuck out, Seriously,
figure it the fuck out. Sleep on a day, Like
there's always a fucking answer, you know what I'm saying. Like,
because now only can you set yourself as your sobriety
back so far you can be dead and the blink
of a fucking eye.

Speaker 5 (01:09:50):
Parents, And for all the listeners out there who have
been there and experienced it and know better now, because
we do know better, we do.

Speaker 4 (01:09:59):
Know the consequences, we know where we're going to end up.
But as anyone way more dead than gile these days,
you had a better chance of dying from overdosing than
what you have of getting caught, because you know you're
using for months and you're hanging out and you go
commit a crime.

Speaker 5 (01:10:14):
You won't get to that point, you'll be dead. Is
it worth it? It's not, you know, And life is good.
Life is good. I just feel that you know what
we are able to bring. And there's many other people
out there like you and I that have a story.

Speaker 4 (01:10:35):
You know, your story is phenomenal, and you know the
direction you're heading, and like, look how good you talk
with such passion and such pride when you speak to
your wife, your current child and one on the way,
and your sobriety. That's an inspiration.

Speaker 1 (01:10:53):
It's cool, Thank you.

Speaker 5 (01:10:55):
It's a fun all think, but it's really cool.

Speaker 6 (01:10:58):
I'm just glad to be an inspiration for people, you
know what I'm saying, Like serious, I'm just beyond bleasted.

Speaker 1 (01:11:03):
God saved my life this and to be a beacon
to hope for people and to be a.

Speaker 6 (01:11:08):
Positive message and a true just vision for people of
what the fuck is possible?

Speaker 5 (01:11:14):
Speaking of what's possible?

Speaker 4 (01:11:15):
And I know that you know, obviously your focus is
going to be around family for some time yet, and
you know what a beautiful thing and what a gift
from God that you have there.

Speaker 5 (01:11:24):
But what's Peter got in store? What are your visions?
Where do you want to see yourself and what do
you have ahead that's going to help people?

Speaker 6 (01:11:33):
My next my next goals, and I haven't I'm going
to really put effort into doing this podcast again now,
so I'm kicking my show back up, so I'd love
to have you on it once I get going again.

Speaker 1 (01:11:43):
But I'm going to have one of the biggest podcasts
in the world.

Speaker 6 (01:11:46):
I want to be the biggest traveling speaker that just
speaks of crumbs prisons even in other countries, and I
just more than anything I want to be I want
to have a wife that, like in twenty years, is
still in love with me, like years now, and my
kids know that I was like the greatest dand ever
and the best example that they've ever seen, and know
that I've would do anything for them and just know

(01:12:07):
they're like they could always count to me, and I
was the best fucking human that they could ever look
up to.

Speaker 1 (01:12:11):
That's what I saw. My kids wi look up to.
People they're older want to hang out with me.

Speaker 5 (01:12:15):
Fuck, I'm feeling your brother. That's that's all. That's that's him.
I mean, that's real shit. Yeah, Wow, it's it's powerful
all the time.

Speaker 6 (01:12:26):
Now, I give no fucks, bro, That's how you can
tell people are tough, Like I don't know, I give
no shit. I would cry in the yard in front
of people too, Like I've always been an emotional person
and now like this kid just got me so emotionally,
I cry all the fucking time.

Speaker 4 (01:12:37):
It's one thing to have somebody on these shows. And
you was in podcaster and before we sort of say
goodbye for the day, I want to make sure that
we get your podcast out there and we get people
over to listen and hear.

Speaker 1 (01:12:50):
And leave your reviews on them. Please. That's what people
don't ever take the time to do.

Speaker 6 (01:12:53):
Like then for your show too, like if you're listeners,
leave it a review, like it's free.

Speaker 1 (01:12:57):
And you listen to it. You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 6 (01:12:58):
That's huge for this ship, you know, Like people don't
realize how much money that we put into these things,
you know, Like I don't, I don't run.

Speaker 5 (01:13:04):
I'm comfortable.

Speaker 6 (01:13:05):
That's what I spent thousands and thousands and thousands of
dollars monthly just run my podcast for everybody.

Speaker 5 (01:13:10):
You know.

Speaker 6 (01:13:10):
It's like now they charge me to upload my shit
to the prison habits And who do you think pays
that me. You know, it's like all we asked was
leavers leave us a freaking review. And that's what ask
on my podcast, like listen to leave review and other
people are.

Speaker 1 (01:13:23):
Like, oh, listen, I'll leave your review. After I listened
to an episode, I'll say, and I'm like, all right, cool.

Speaker 6 (01:13:27):
Then I guarantee it's going to mean even better view
than you would asked if you to just laugh me
on if that's what you want to do, you know
what I'm saying. So yeah, Like my podcast is row
Cover Chappy and it's on our platforms. Listen, start with
the episode one because I've interview my mom, my dad,
and my stepmom.

Speaker 5 (01:13:41):
I'm going to ask you two tools to leave behind
for today's guests, because that's what I ask of all
my guests in the end about our season.

Speaker 4 (01:13:49):
We have a toolbox of life that basically enables others
out there to understand that they can achieve great things
in their life, no matter how tough or how hard.

Speaker 5 (01:13:58):
Life has been. Peter, what are two main key tools
that have gotten you to this point in your life
today that you would hand down to a young.

Speaker 6 (01:14:09):
I'll tell you Number one is perspective if I can't
tell this a quick story. Why I say this, Sha,
was when I was doing work after I got out
of prison. I was doing this work with this big
foundation out of La the System, Mary's Foundation, where she
gets these lifeers out of prison that were doing life
senses and death row sentences, and she corresponds to them
and gets them out of the right and then they
all work for her nonprofit making minimum ways.

Speaker 1 (01:14:29):
But none of them know how to act as adultshire,
you know.

Speaker 6 (01:14:31):
And so I was doing some work out there for free,
of course, and I remember I pulled up and there
was this og right there and said right in the
hood of La California.

Speaker 1 (01:14:41):
And you guys could.

Speaker 6 (01:14:42):
Tell the dude did a bunch of time, like triple og,
big black dude right and wearing the shitties suffice you've
ever seen. Like it was a dress shirt missing the
bottom part of it, like the buttons weren't even all
on it. You could see his jeans were fifty sizes
too big, and it was a string that was tying
in to it. And he had some like look like
prison work boots, right, And I got out of the
car and I'm.

Speaker 1 (01:14:59):
Like, I'm like, damn, what's up og, I said, what's
going on?

Speaker 6 (01:15:02):
You know what he tells me, Man, Now you're just
and enjoying this fresh air, but he's picking up trash
like with a glove like he was doing on prison.

Speaker 1 (01:15:10):
I was like, right then it hit me.

Speaker 6 (01:15:11):
I was like, holy shit, man, if you can just
be grateful to breathe fresh fucking air and know that
you can do anything you want in this life, no
matter if you think your life shit, you're not right
there that there's other people that don't get that opportunity,
Like you have an advantage on the rest of the world. Like,
think about that and just think if you can break
it down to that dumb perspective on like be grateful
tomorrow to brief fresh air.

Speaker 5 (01:15:29):
Wow, that's powerful.

Speaker 1 (01:15:31):
And then two I would say, like this, create your
own lane.

Speaker 5 (01:15:34):
Man.

Speaker 6 (01:15:34):
If you're young, like, don't listen to nobody else. And
like the most true statement ever is your net work
is your net worth. And that goes to the childhood.
If you're hanging around want to be tough, gangster, shithead kids,
you're gonna end up where I went and where you went.
And if you're hanging around people that are doing positive
stuff and playing sports, you're probably gonna do that, like
you have one shot at this life, man.

Speaker 1 (01:15:54):
And I always tell kids, and I'm working with them.

Speaker 6 (01:15:56):
Like you know, when you're an adult, you can make
millions of dollars or six figures twenty different ways, switch
your career every year if you want. You never get
your childhood years back, you know. And that's the only
thing I'm not at peace with. It's my childhood gers.

Speaker 5 (01:16:06):
You know.

Speaker 6 (01:16:07):
I screwed them up so bad. I never played a
high school sport. And the only thing that gives me
a peace of that is finally now I get to
do it with my sons, you know. So they're the
same exact age and me, my brother, we are apart.
We're both eighteen months. They're going to be eighteen months apart,
two boys. So I get to do it, rewrite my
own childhood right in front of my own eyes.

Speaker 5 (01:16:22):
I love it. Brother. As I said, you are a
very inspiring man, and you're all against the odds, to
be honest. Statistics were against you, life was against you.
You were against yourself, and here you are today inspiring
others through your actions. And thank God for that because
we need more people like you. I want to say
to you, thank you for your time.

Speaker 6 (01:16:42):
Thanks for having me. Go buy my book against a
Lot and listen to the podcast. Thank you for having
me man, this is a pleasure.

Speaker 5 (01:16:47):
Tonana.

Speaker 4 (01:16:48):
There you have it, guys all the way from the States.
What an absolute gentlemen. Peter. We'll have all his details
in our links and please jump across to his page
give him some support. I'll put it up on the
Clink podcast page on Instagram, and remember to go into
sideways surf Clink Ink apparel. Be the best you can be.
Make sure you get in there and grab yours and

(01:17:09):
keep supporting. Thank you for everybody who is new and
to all our regular listeners, thanks for supporting the Clink.
Let's bring on that five million. Peter, You're a legend brother.
Thank you again.

Speaker 1 (01:17:21):
Thank you guys, have a good one. It's a pleasure.

Speaker 2 (01:17:23):
For the record, I don't try and make you uncomfortable
for the record. You ain't try and world under stuff
for your for the record lab on me going hard
away for the record. Ain't trying to link, no trying to.

Speaker 3 (01:17:35):
Watch for the record, for the record, for the record,
for the recon for the record, for the record,

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